Now, isn’t it interesting that Dean didn’t tell all the hunters there this story? When he just spent five hours telling Jody the story? I think the reason this whole “people tell stories about you” makes him so uncomfortable is that he has no control over these stories. He doesn’t know how much of the truth they tell and in what light they portray him.
It is also interesting to see he told Jody about killing Hitler, but not that their mother is back from the dead. Because one is the story of a victory - there is no denying that Hitler was evil and killing him prevents the world from a lot of awful things. Dean is the hero of this story. With Mary though… what started as something incredible beautiful, the one thing Dean wanted the most, turned sour. Not because Mary didn’t turn out the way Dean remembered her, but because she left. Dean didn’t tell this story, because from his perspective it is no longer a happy story. It is just yet another reminder of something he knew all along - everyone he loves will leave him evetually. And of course he thinks he is the one to blame.
Like, Dean’s whole reaction to Bucky telling him that the stories people tell about him are wilder than the ones they tell about Asa is to look…I don’t know if haunted is the right word, but he definitely doesn’t look pleased or satisfied with that knowledge.
On some level he’s still trying to be proprietary about Mary, but now that she is living and real he can’t be in charge of her memory.
Dean is no longer in control over Mary’s story. Ever since John’s death he was the only one who left who remembered her. He was the only source of knowledge about her to Sam. Now that she is alive she writes her own story and rewrites the story Dean had made up about her, the one about the perfect mum and housewife he needed to believe in.
This episode is not only about “the story became the story”, but about who is telling the story and who has contro over the story. It is the difference between someone else telling your story and yourself telling your own story.
Right. He’s had the rug pulled out from under his own assumptions, his memories that kept him going. He’s mourning, in some ways, the Mary he’d kept alive because the real one has arriving has killed her.
Also, both of your comments are great because they nail something absolutely critical: we all want control over our own stories, and losing that control is distressing.
Knowing he’s the subject of hunter gossip makes him twitch. Losing control of Mary’s story – which is his origin story, really – is a struggle for him.
I should stress that neither of those loses is bad. We can’t control how people react to us. We have to learn to deal with that. Likewise, we can’t expect people not to be who they are, or to exist only to give us meaning. We have to grow past that.