you're too precious for your own good

8

An AU where everything is all fine and dandy, and they go to school like normal kids do?? that’s all I ask for c’mon

Part 2

Pandora Hearts who should you fight?
  • Oz: Are you fucking kidding me? Why would you want to fight the sweetest, most precious angel ever? Oh, but be warned, he's fucking B-rabbit, big huge black rabbit that can stab you to death with chains; this boy can destroy the entire world if he wants with his giant scythe. Do not fight him, he'd rather be friends with you. FRIENDS. DO NOT FIGHT OZ.
  • Gil: are you kidding me? Gil's the most innocent man ever. Actually, no, no he's not. Go ahead, he'll shoot the crap out of you or burn you up. And if you touch Oz, you're dead, too. You'll lose.
  • Alice: Are you kidding me? This girl stabbed herself with scissors and is still alive. Don't fuck with her. She'll kick you into next week or use Oz's powers to utterly destroy you. She'll make meat out of you. Don't fight Alice. Don't.
  • Break: You've gotta be screwing around here. He may be old, but he'll literally kill you. He's a murderer. He might be blind, but he will chop you into pieces so bad no one will find the body. He has Mad Hatter, after all. You'd have to be mad to harm an innocent old man and his sweets fetish. Don't.
  • Sharon: You want to hurt her? Her horse can teleport her anywhere and she's a sadist with a fetish for beating up men. You've been warned. You'd better play her tea parties of pretend or else get the harisen of doom. Do not fight Sharon.
  • Oscar: You're so evil! This old man is so nice, what did he ever do to you?
  • Zai: You're asking to die, aren't you? Zai will dissect you with his Gryphon and feed you to it for dinner. Especially if you're dumb enough to touch Ada first.
  • Ada: Ada's a sweet cinnamon roll, why would you touch her? Zai will kill you, that is if Vincent or Oz doesn't first.
  • Echo: Ooh boy, Noise will come and fuck you up. You're gonna be a PUPPET AND IT WON'T BE PRETTY. Don't fight sweet little innocent Echo.
  • Elliot: Do you want to be owned by Humpty Dumpty? Do you want a giant creepy blob to attack you? Didn't think so. Don't fight Elliot. Especially over Holy Knight. Don't. Fight. Elliot. Because if you hurt him, Leo will kill you.
  • Leo: Don't fight Leo. Don't. He has a dragon that can kill you in ten thousand ways. He can send you to hell and laugh, too. And he will.
  • Bernice: don't fight her. Don't. She'll stab you.
  • Vanessa: She'll bitch-slap you to hell, wtf, man? Why attack such a nice girl?
  • Marie: She's gonna stab you to death a thousand times. Stay away from her and Rytas-sama. Seriously.
  • Cheshire: You're dead. He'll slice you up into pieces. That, or let you drift among memories for eternity.
  • Alyss: Are you kidding me? You wanna hurt the sweetest, gentlest cinnamon roll in all of PH? She's gonna stab you in the eye, or she can literally make you explode just if she wishes it. And she'll dance in your blood if she wants. Go ahead and fight Alyss. It's your funeral.
  • Lacie: You're dead. You're so dead. She'll cut you up with her chain. And if she doesn't kill you,then Oswald or Jack certainly will for touching their precious girl.
  • Jack: You're mad. You're fucking mad. Why would you mess with the psycho who tried to destroy the world? He'll use Oz to kill you in a horrifying manner and he'll just sit there and smile. Oh, and if you've hurt Lacie, he'll kill you even more. You don't know fear unless you meet Jack. Stay away from him. He's a precious cinnamon roll, too.
  • Lily: See cute child. Don't shoot cute child. Cute child will fuck you up and have you for dinner, courtesy of cute dog Bandersnatch.
  • Lottie: Are you nuts? She's a sadist and dominatrix. She'll kill you before you touch her. Leave her be.
  • Noise: She's gonna kick your ass.
  • Vincent: You're mad. Vincent will just kill you, painfully. Especially if you mess with his brother, first. Vince no like people who hurt his precious Gil. Be prepared to be beheaded.
  • Miranda: She's toxic. She'll poison you before you even touch her. WTF, man.
  • Rufus: Are you kidding me? He'll make toast out of you. He'll expose your secrets to the world.
  • Sheryl: Stay on Grandma's good side, please.
  • Oswald: You're nuts. He has four chains. He can own you with less than four. Be prepared. Be very prepared.
  • Fang: Too sweet. Why hurt nice Fang?
  • Dug: He'll crush you. Don't even try.