you're messing with the wrong guy

Getting texts from Joker before and after running away (Mission gone Wrong!)
  • (Before running away)
  • ♥️Y/n: I didn't mean too! I didn't expect Robin to sneak up behind me like that!
  • 🃏Joker: You stupid Bitch! You're a fucking assassin! How the FUCK do you not know when there's a person behind you?
  • ♥️Y/n: Don't Fucking blame this on me J! Your guys are the ones who actually messed this up! How the fuck did they not see someone coming right in front of them? Are they blind?
  • 🃏Joker: You're just saying this because it's on text! If you have the guts, say these shits in front of my face!
  • ♥️Y/n: FUCK OFF!
  • ♥️Y/n: You fucking broccoli looking face! IM NOT FUCKING STAYING WITH YOU ANYMORE! FUCKING PHYCHO!Can't even kill the bat when he's right in front of you but can act tough when he's gone!
  • 🃏Joker: You know what! Stay at my penthouse! I wanna see you! I'm sorry for putting so much pressure on you and calling you a bitch! It wasn't you, it was my guys who messed up!
  • ♥️Y/n: It's okay! I'll wait for you!
  • (After running away)
  • ♥️Y/n: YOU STUPID IDIOT! You think I'm gonna stay and watch you kill me? That's bullshit! And I thought you were smart enough to catch onto what I was saying.
  • 🃏Joker: Oh you messed with the wrong person doll! I'm not the one ANYONE including YOU should mess with. I will find you and make you pay!
  • ♥️Y/n: Pay for what? For your gas? Fuck that shit I'm outta here! You ain't gonna find me because I'm not even in the same country as you!
  • (You are in fact in the same STATE as him!)
  • 🃏Joker: Babygirl! You know daddy is sorry for what he did to you! Why don't you come back and play with him! After all, I'm the only one who can please you!
  • ♥️Y/n: Fuck you asshole! Although I hate you, I would still love to Fuck you but looking into the future, it doesn't look like I'm with you anymore!
  • 🃏Joker: I'm gonna find you, and make you mine after punishing you!
  • ♥️Y/n: I'm not fucking Harley to stick around with you after all the abuse! You can't find me! Until then, peace out Joker!
  • (No hate to Harley Quinn❤️💙)
  • 🃏Joker: See you soon Babygirl!
Signs as Shit my Philosophy Teacher Says:
  • Aries: "Don't bring me that smoothie bullshit, I want real, authentic, Indian food!"
  • Taurus: "Yo, I know you're the head bitch here, but you're wrong"
  • Gemini: "We are still suffering, bitches"
  • Cancer: "Guys, you need to know the bible"
  • Leo: "That guy isn't compassionate, he's a dick"
  • Virgo: "You don't deserve shit!"
  • Libra: "Gotta learn how to love it, gotta learn how to hug it"
  • Scorpio: "We are all messed up, we are all broken"
  • Sagittarius: "That's bullshit just keep the money"
  • Capricorn: "Someone has peeled an onion here right- Are. You. Kidding me?!"
  • Aquarius: "Hey man I'm depressed and that sucks"
  • Pisces: "Shut up! I'm good at art guys!"


Happy Endings Sentence Starters
  • "You're sweating on my bruschetta."
  • "I just thought it'd be better to have an actual professional, not somebody who wears a turtleneck he found on the ground."
  • "Aha! This is a mock turtleneck and I found it in the garbage."
  • "I bartered for this outfit using only illegal Mexican candy, I think I got this."
  • "I look like a quaalude dealer."
  • "He messed with your V necks? That's like messing with a straight guy's crew necks."
  • "Damn you're one hot skinny little witch."
  • "It's called Hollywood, not Hollyfriends."
  • "I picked up my knitting again and you better believe I don't stick to conventional stitches."
  • "Egg nog is delish! Dairy and liquor are really one of those underrated combinations."
  • "Even I think that's gay and I had sex with a dude last night."
  • "Give me that knife and like me more!"
  • "TV really is nature's babysitter."
  • "What's wrong? Did you push the Qtip in too far again?"
  • "Only you would spend hundreds of dollars to get a free 99 cent food item."
  • "My smoothie budget is out of control. Daddy don't do domestic papaya!"
  • "Seriously I got stuck with the check again? What's the point of having white friends?"
  • "Between you and me, I don't think he should be Santa. He has many drawers...sinful drawers."
  • "I wouldn't turn my nose up to dating a mugger, they're entrepreneurs."
  • "I'd rather be surprised by a disappointment than happy with what I expected. It's why I never ask if a pool is heated."
  • "You make a sexy sandwich."
  • "You've been cooped up here way too long. You're starting to "Rear Window" and make stuff up."
  • "What was so important that you had to call us over here, I was right in the middle of doing nothing."
  • "You look like Carol Brady right before she got arrested for molesting Bobby."
  • "You guys are addicted to these addiction shows."
  • "Don't change for a guy, meet a guy and change him."
  • "Every choice you make in your life about everything is monumentally wrong."
  • "This is not the time for jokes guys. Especially when this is the fattest I've ever been. How could you let me out of the house looking this fat?"
  • "C'mon guys, you always leave me hanging with the dirty sound effects."
thinkin about cromartie persona again
  • shadow yamaguchi: hmph. you're pathetic. all this talk about becoming a comedian is really only to hide how worthless a fighter you are. your desire to make people laugh is only a reaction to your own uselessness in all facets of your life, and the reason you over-analyze your own comedy is that you're afraid of messing that up, too. the truth is that everyone around you is funnier than you are and you won't even acknowledge it
  • yamaguchi's internal monologue: well, this guy's basically got me pegged to a tee, honestly. i really do think like that sometimes, and i feel like engaging with these problems head on would be good for me. but... wouldn't it be funnier if i go against that and completely deny him right off the bat? no, no, no, i'm thinking about this from the wrong perspective. everyone else is expecting me to outright deny him... so that means accepting him immediately would be a funnier punchline. no... are these really the only options i have for a punchline? i need to think more outside the box, here
  • ishikawa: n-no! you're not me!
  • yamaguchi: hrnk...
  • yamaguchi's internal monologue: wow, i almost flew off the handle and said something like "of course you're not him, you idiot! he's supposed to be me!" i don't want to be the straight man in this bit! ishikawa sure is a comedic force to be reckoned with, nowadays...
  • kamiyama: shadow yamaguchi, i hate to admit it, but you're right. i AM useless in a fight, and i use my comedy as a crutch to feel like i'm accomplishing something when all i'm doing is thinking up jokes that i won't even share because i'm too afraid. i'll gladly accept you as part of myself and use this experience to grow stronger in all aspects of my life
  • Shadow Yamaguchi became Kamiyama's new persona, Sukuna-Hikona.
  • yamaguchi: ?????????????

“I really wasn’t expecting this. I am in such a strong category with such incredible actors. I’ve spent all the time since the nominations convinced that everybody else was gonna win. Tim, Richard, James - incredible people. I’d like to say, a huge thank you to David Lan, for having the foresight to bring Ivo Van Hove and Jan Versweyveld over from Holland to direct Arthur Miller in this extraordinary production. I’d like to thank Daisy and Lucy (?) at the Young Vic, I’d like to thank all those that came on a journey with us, Jeff, James, Alex, Ruthie, Caroline, Cerica (?). I’d like to thank the amazing cast, and I’d name you all if I had more than 40 seconds, cos they’re all fantastic. What’s been amazing about being at the Young Vic and the Wyndham’s, doing this play, is the young people that came to see it, who all wanted to talk about what they were seeing. A 12 year old boy asked me, “What is the purpose of theatre? What’s the point of theatre?” And I’ve never been in a production that people have wanted to talk about more. All the people that came back for autographs, for selfies, hugs, all wanted to discuss what the characters were doing on stage, why they were doing it, whether they agreed with them, how they felt about what they were doing, who they trusted, and that made me realise that thousands of years have gone by and we still have this thing called live theatre and the reason is that we need to be able to compare ourselves to what we’re seeing up there, judge ourselves as human beings, decide what’s right, what’s wrong, who we are, why we’re here. That’s the point of theatre. Thank you very much.”

- A transcript of Mark Strong’s full speech for winning Best Actor at the 2015 Olivier Awards (I apologise if I messed up a name or two for the crew of the production - I typed this out while following Mark’s speech, so you can imagine the speed I had to keep up with. Also, sorry about the quality of the screenshots!)

Until Dawn + How they kiss you
  • Mike: His kisses tend to be rough or passionate
  • Sam: soft, warm kisses that feel like you're being embraced
  • Ashley: When she kisses you, they tend to be more of a surprise and her lips are normally cold, it's like getting kissed by icecream
  • Jess: Her kisses are sloppy and intense, they get your heart racing
  • Emily: Believe it or not, her kisses are shy and quick because she isn't used to showing such affection
  • Matt: He's a pretty straight forward guy, he'll just kiss you.
  • Josh: He'll kiss you like you've been together for eternity and he doesn't shy away from affection.
  • Chris: This dufus will mess up your kisses, he'll put his nose wrong or bump your forehead but when he gets it right, the kisses tend to be slow and loving.
The age old "Cool Guy vs. Dweeb" debate:
  • Me: it's a lot of work, hanging out with someone so cool
  • Boyfriend: Yeah. How do you manage that?
  • Me: Well, it's easier when you're the cool one. I just act naturally.
  • Boyfriend: I actually meant because you're such a dweeb.
  • Me: Yeah no, you have that backwards.
  • Me: I'm the cool guy.
  • Me: I know you forget.
  • Boyfriend: Okay right, dweeb.
  • Me: Oh you actually messed it up again.
  • Me: YOU'RE the dweeb
  • Me: Which makes me the cool guy.
  • Boyfriend: Yeah, see, dweebs sometimes get this wrong, so I'll try and explain it.
  • Boyfriend: But YOU'RE actually the dweeb.
  • Boyfriend: so
  • Boyfriend: yeah
  • Me: Well, it sounds like you explained why you keep forgetting
  • that it's you...
  • Boyfriend: I could see how you'd make that mistake
  • Boyfriend: But since I am...
  • Me: A side effect of dweebiness though is actually thinking you're a cool guy when you're not. It's a little embarrassing for you.
  • Me: But I still love you, since I'm such a cool guy.
  • Boyfriend: You're just like
  • Boyfriend: super wrong.

anonymous asked:

Why do you think Kylo killing his father was impulsive and didn't signify him turning to the Dark completely? I'm curious since a lot of other bloggers seem to agree on this... Ofc I'd love to have a Kylo redemption and see more of his conflict so I hope you're right.

Because Kylo wants so desperately to shove the light inside him away and prove himself to Snoke, Hux and to Vader. He relies on peoples’ opinion of him, the poor guy, that’s so not healthy. But, anyway, Kylo thinks that killing Han will finally throw that slither of light away but he is wrong, obviously, as stated in the novel of TFA, that killing Han actually made Kylo weaker. Hence, why he was punching his wound; pain = anger = dark side powers. Kylo is going to be even more of a mess in Episode 8 and I can’t wait. 

ask-the-nightvale-soldier-deact  asked:

I hate to admit I'm wrong, but I think I miiight have underestimated you, Steve. Even with your conspiracy theories, you're still a cool guy, I'm sorry for insulting. But you're still an ass for calling Carlos and outsider.

“I’m just worried, y’know? I mean, he /isn’t/ from Night Vale, after all… and with all of this mess going on, we don’t know /who/ to trust!”

“Also, he /is/ dating my step-brother. Even if Cecil doesn’t like me much, I still don’t want him getting hurt. I really do care about him…”