you're gonna get killed by a girl

Les Misérables
  • Valjean: i stole fucking bread
  • Javert: five years
  • Valjean: i tried to check on my family you piece of shit
  • Javert: fourteen more
  • Valjean: im free
  • Javert: technically,,,, you're not,,,,, but ok,,,,
  • Bishop: hey u look like ur having trouble come over at my place
  • Valjean: fuck it
  • Valjean: *steals*
  • Javert: ffs you wouldn't be in jail if-
  • Bishop: no it's cool i gave him that shit
  • Javert: oh.
  • 20 years later or smth
  • Valjean: aye im mayor now
  • Fantine: i have a daughter you inconsiderate imbeciles
  • Fantine's boss and coworkers: fuck you
  • Fantine: i don't want to do this
  • Valjean: u don't have to
  • Valjean: hey kid u want some candy
  • Cosette: fuck yea
  • Thénardiers: you want her? go have her
  • 20 more years later i think
  • Éponine: i lowkey love you
  • Marius: im oblivious as shit. ooOO a HOT girl
  • Cosette: ooOO a HOT guy
  • Marius: hey, take me to her
  • Éponine: ok
  • Éponine: (kill me)
  • Enjolras: REVOLUTION
  • Grantaire: you're gonna get us killed, moron
  • Grantaire: (but you're my moron)
  • Les Amis de'lABC: we died.
  • Éponine: me too
  • Valjean: mY FUTURE SON IN LAW IS DEAD
  • Javert: sTOP R I G H T THERE
  • Valjean: *gives Javert guilt trip*
  • Javert: oh
  • Javert: oh shit
  • Javert: *kills himself*
  • A year later I think
  • Marius: all my friends are dead
  • Cosette: i love you
  • Marius: love u too
  • Valjean: im dying
  • Cosette: please,,,, god,,,, no,,,, enough people have DIED already
  • Fantine: hey old pal. ur awesome
  • Éponine: u protected my crush. ur awesome
  • Bishop: ur awesome
  • Everyone: we're all awesome!!
The 100 ways to say 'I love you' femslash edition
  • 1. "I always know when you're lying"
  • 2. "You, kids; I can see it"
  • 3. "You just wake up like that, naturally flawless"
  • 4. "It's fun seeing you like this"
  • 5. "I got a bottle of schnapps and half a rhubarb pie; let's see which one makes us sick first"
  • 6. "I just want to make crazy science with you"
  • 7. "It’s a big cliff, you just have to leap"
  • 8. "I think we're gonna be really fast friends"
  • 9. "We have nothing in common... couldn’t be more different"
  • 10. "You don't deserve any of this, so just put it on me and I'll take it"
  • 11. "You might be nuts but what can I say - you're my kind of crazy"
  • 12. "Sorry I'm late. It's nice to see you"
  • 13. "Maybe I'm going to get my heart broken into a million little pieces, but those are just maybes, and you can't live your life according to maybes"
  • 14. "You said it yourself; this is about us"
  • 15. "So what are we gonna do, gorgeous?"
  • 16. "We're kind of friends, huh?"
  • 17. "Maybe we should just marry each other"
  • 18. "I double dare you; kiss me now"
  • 19. "I'm staying here because I wanna stay here"
  • 20. "Before we get started, I just want you to know, if you're a screamer, feel free"
  • 21. "I want us to be friends; would you like that?"
  • 22. "How will I survive without my best friend?"
  • 23. "I’m not afraid of you"
  • 24. "You don't have to hide from anyone anymore"
  • 25. "What the hell, you want some?"
  • 26. "I'd pick you first"
  • 27. "Would you be surprised to learn you’ve been on my mind?"
  • 28. "It is nice to have you. Here. Have you here."
  • 29. "You should come with me"
  • 30. "It was the only way I could think of to save you"
  • 31. "Don't be afraid"
  • 32. "Who can say if I've been changed for the better but because I knew you, I have been changed for good"
  • 33. "Don't forget me"
  • 34. "The geek speak is working, Doctor"
  • 35. "You need my help"
  • 36. "You are physically flawless"
  • 37. "There's someone in particular that's really worried about you"
  • 38. "I heart you"
  • 39. "I’m not going anywhere"
  • 40. "Sophomore year, I used to sit in this back row and secretly watch you. I counted the number of times you’d smile at me, and I’d die on days that you didn’t"
  • 41. "Any guy would be insanely lucky to go out with you"
  • 42. "I'm under your spell"
  • 43. "I’m not gonna stop trying; even if you still wanna kill me"
  • 44. "When I'm with you I feel like I'm a better person"
  • 45. "May we meet again"
  • 46. "A lot of pressure up there"
  • 47. "Thank you for inviting me"
  • 48. "I promised you once I'd help you get your happy ending"
  • 49. "I'm so glad that I met you"
  • 50. "I just want you to be safe"
  • 51. "You're a celestial body"
  • 52. "Prettiest girl I’ve ever met, but you’re a lot more than that"
  • 53. "You are deceptively complex; I do not understand you"
  • 54. "I’ve been waiting out here all night"
  • 55. "How do you say goodbye to the one person who knows you better than anyone else?"
  • 56. "What do you like to do?"
  • 57. "You certainly know how to make a first impression"
  • 58. "I know you're in there; I can see the light's on"
  • 59. "Were we really friends?"
  • 60. "My gift to you is good memories"
  • 61. "No; I'm not leaving without you"
  • 62. "It’s good to see you again"
  • 63. "Where you go, I'm at your side"
  • 64. "Fuck this guy; so many people are gonna love you"
  • 65. "I never meant to let you down"
  • 66. "In 1698 it might as well have been sex"
  • 67. "I’ll kiss your dumb lips"
  • 68. "You’re so special to me"
  • 69. "I know that was you"
  • 70. "Never thought I'd be so happy to see someone in pain"
  • 71. "I’m going with you"
  • 72. "You're not like anyone I've ever met, in any of my many lifetimes"
  • 73. "I choose you; I will always choose you"
  • 74. "The past doesn’t matter anymore, you’re with me now"
  • 75. "I'll say it when you come back"
  • 76. "You can tell me anything"
  • 77. "I just want you to know you're safe with me"
  • 78. "You made it"
  • 79. "I always made you think your feelings for me were totally one-sided, that wasn’t true; those kisses weren’t just for practice"
  • 80. "You deserve the best of everything"
  • 81. "You’re going to hate me forever and that would just break my heart"
  • 82. "You taking something for the pain?"
  • 83. "Always"
  • 84. "I really want you to come... with me"
  • 85. "Well, if you need anything, I'm around"
  • 86. "You do whatever it takes to protect your family"
  • 87. "I release you"
  • 88. "You're still cute"
  • 89. "I need a favor"
  • 90. "I'm not leaving, friends don't do that to one another"
  • 91. "I have a cure for a headache that doesn't involve coffee"
  • 92. "Hey, look, I hugged you there! Did you see how I hugged you?"
  • 93. "Don't make me climb over this stall; I'll do it but I'll be really pissed"
  • 94. "You're my person"
  • 95. "You should have a muffin; they're really good and they help you"
  • 96. "Dance with me"
  • 97. "You deserve it more than anyone; go, let yourself be loved"
  • 98. "You minx"
  • 99. "You've change me and I am not easy to change"
  • And...
  • 100. "I love you"
Sherlock characters as Mitch Hedberg jokes
  • Sherlock: I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.
  • John: If I had nine of my fingers missing I wouldn't type any slower.
  • Moriarty: A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer.
  • Hudders: Do you think when the guy came up with the idea to invent a bong, a blacklight popped up over his head?
  • Mary: My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.
  • Mycroft: I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.
  • Lestrade: I play golf. I'm not good at golf, I never got good. I never got a hole-in-one. But I did hit a guy. And that's way more satisfying. You're supposed to yell "Fore!" but I was too busying mumbling "There ain't no way that's gonna hit him."
  • Molly: I had a piece of Carefree sugarless gum... and I was still worried.
  • Anderson: I don't have a girlfriend. I just know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.
  • Donovan: I told the crowd last night to fuck off, but then I felt bad, so I said "All right, fuck back on."
  • (Bonus) Sherlock: Imagine being killed by a bow and arrow, that would suck. An arrow killed you? They would never solve the crime. "Look at that dead guy... Let's go that way."
Beautiful Creatures Sentence Meme
  • "I've been having the same dream for months now."
  • "I want him/her, no matter what happens."
  • "At first I thought I was losing my mind. Then I realized it would be no great loss."
  • "Insanity's inevitable."
  • "It was like love before first sight."
  • "Only two types of people here, the ones too stupid to leave and the ones too stuck to move."
  • "Anything is better than a life standing still."
  • "To be unstuck in time in a constant state of stage fright."
  • "If I dress like I care, I lose credibility."
  • "I envy people in comas."
  • "How does loving Jesus make that man/woman so crazy?"
  • "Why would anyone wanna move here?"
  • "How 'bout you and I go see a movie or something? Oh, that'd be just heaven!"
  • "I wish you would stop reading those types of books, they're bad for your mind."
  • "_____ looks like death eating a cracker."
  • "Are you nuts? You almost killed me!"
  • "You know I never understood why Leo had to die in the end! Why couldn't they take turns?"
  • "If I get in the car, will there be more of this interesting conversation? Because I'd rather drown."
  • "I can't believe you told me the ending to Titanic!"
  • "Well, that was a dead-end conversation on a road going nowhere."
  • "I don't feel like being a haunted house attraction today."
  • "Some people never go crazy, what truly horrible lives they must live."
  • "I think we need time apart."
  • "I pray every night you won't go straight to Hell."
  • "I won't go straight to Hell, I wanna stop off in New York first."
  • "This is one of those banned books."
  • "You can't pray in class."
  • "Never been on the outside looking in, have you?"
  • "I memorized this whole thing to impress you. Damn!"
  • "I never know whether you're insulting me or not."
  • "Again, wrong century."
  • "_____ loves Google."
  • "I hope this doesn't sound weird but I think I've been dreaming about you every night for months."
  • "That did not sound as creepy as it did in my head."
  • "So, like what, you're from Europe?"
  • "We prefer the term "Caster.""
  • "That is such a mortal thing to say."
  • "I hate hiding all the time."
  • "You're a miracle. Why would you ever want to be normal?"
  • "You wanna go out with me?"
  • "Wait, am I going out the window?"
  • "Promise me it'll be a really normal, awkward teenager date."
  • "I won't even call you after!"
  • "Let's get out of here."
  • "Most people spend their entire lives waiting for a moment that's going to change everything and it never comes."
  • "What could happen besides getting your first hangover?"
  • "They can choose, why can't you?"
  • "I don't know who I really am inside."
  • "I distinctly remember not inviting you."
  • "Boyfriend/girlfriend, huh?"
  • "Loving this boy/girl puts you in terrible danger!"
  • "You're not losing me!"
  • "No matter what you do, no matter they do to me, I'm still here! Now what does that tell you!"
  • "And I yelled at you because I care about you!"
  • "I don't want to be any further away from you than I am right now."
  • "I'm scared I'm gonna hurt you."
  • "Go ahead, kill me."
  • "The person I love has to die!"
  • "I just want to be with you."
  • "That's okay, I don't think you're cool now."
  • "How am I gonna survive a lifetime with you surprising me?"
  • "They took you from me."
  • "You can never be together."
  • "Define 'good.'"

anonymous asked:

Jesus Christ! What a whiny cry for attention! Shit or get off the pot dude. Just because you think you are some kind of Dom, harvesting underage Littles and Lee's, making them obey you, giving them rules, giving them to pose on Skype for you... You've done bad things and you've used a lot of young girls. Now you're trying to see who's gonna suck up to you, feeding your ego evening more. Dirty little narcissist. Stop using vulnerable little girls and just leave the community. You are NOT a daddy

Kill yourself you cum guzzling piece of shit.

THE SIGNS AS MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE LYRICS
  • Aries: “Bite the future and fuck the past” - I Hate Jimmy Page
  • Taurus: “For what it’s worth, I’d do it again” - What Do They Know?
  • Gemini: “I dress myself in fuckin' lies- I don't care” - Eveningwear
  • Cancer: “There is nothing you can do that I have not already done to myself” - Never Wanted to Dance
  • Leo: “Better than this, better than that; Better watch out when you get me goin'“ - On It
  • Virgo: “You know what I need is--And you're never gonna be it” - Issues
  • Libra: “She was a good girl and it felt great to be a liar” - Molly
  • Scorpio: “If I’m so wonderful then why am I so misunderstood?” - Kill the Rock
  • Sagittarius: “i will never be young; i will never be loved; i will never be wrong” - Royally Fucked
  • Capricorn: “Don't feel sorry for me feeling sorry's been my life's devotion; Anyway, screw you, my sentiments the same my friend” - Bed of Roses
  • Aquarius: “ ‘Fuck you man’ don’t mean nothing any more” - Played
  • Pisces: “Some, some other way, Some other place, I could be real important” - Keeping up with the Kids
the signs as disturbing regina spektor lyrics
  • Aries: i cut off my tongue... / you started to kiss me... / blood trickled down... / don't you ever miss me? (i cut off my hair)
  • Taurus: Hey, remember that time that you OD'ed? (that time)
  • Gemini: my heart eats beets...ts-ts...eats...ts-ts...beats... (just like the movies)
  • Cancer: He was running like a child running in a game of tag— / until he was hit— / until he was "It—" (the soup)
  • Leo: i don't exist / i don't exist / i don't exist / i don't exist / i don't exist / i don't exist / i don't exist / i don't exist (daniel cowman)
  • Virgo: Yo girl, can't you watch where you are? / You don't watch where the hell you're goin', you're gonna get yourself killed... (belt)
  • Libra: I'm taking a knife to all the books that I own / and I'm chopping and chopping and boiling / soup from stone (the flowers)
  • Scorpio: Stop jerkin' off and eat your chicken, baby / It's like a colony of hungry ants down here (chicken song)
  • Sagittarius: December starts on Sunday, next Sundаy, won't you feel happier then? (december)
  • Capricorn: These baobabs and baobabs and baobabs some more / but you can't outwait Fate... (baobabs)
  • Aquarius: Be afraid of the cold; they'll inherit your blood. (après moi)
  • Pisces: And how many times have you snuck down to that cellar / Just to watch how the roots begin to grow straight up through our floor? (ave maria)
  • Farkle: Since Lucas & Zay are going back to Texas for the summer and Smackle is going to be busy prepping and moving, I thought we could road trip together. Just the three of us, like old times. My dad already bought us a mini van with three seats in the front, so-
  • Maya: I'm driving!
  • Farkle: No, I'm driving. It's my van, after all!
  • Maya: But you're a terrible driver!
  • Farkle: I'm a safe driver, thank you very much.
  • Maya: You drive like an old man!
  • Riley: I'm driving. End of story. Give me the keys, Farkle.
  • Farkle: Fine, but I get to sit in the middle!
  • Maya: What are you talking about? She's my best friend, I get to sit next to her whenever I want to! It's a rule!
  • Farkle: She's my best friend too, Shortcake!
  • Maya: You did not just call me that!
  • Farkle: Short Stack.
  • Maya: I'm gonna kill you.
  • Farkle: Tiny Little Leprechaun.
  • Maya: You better run.
  • Farkle: Munchkin. Shrimp. Small fry. Nugget. Oompa Loompa.
  • [Maya looks positively deadly]
  • Farkle: [Runs] OKAY, I'M DONE!
  • Riley: [Shakes head and laughs] Dorks.
  • Farkle: I PREFER GENIUS!
  • Maya: I PREFER PEACHES!
  • Maya & Farkle in unison: YOU'RE THE DORK, RILEY!
  • Riley: You two are ridiculous.
Fairy Tail B Team!
  • John: M'kay folks, I gotta cool question for youuu! A fan wrote a ask wondering who would survive in a horror movie scenario, and can't use their magic to protect them.
  • All: Juvia.
  • John: H...huh?
  • Laxus: Juvia is well known in getting herself out of situations and act really sneaky if she has to. Little snot isn't afraid of much anyway.
  • Mira: It's really cute, actually. Juvia would definitely be the one to probably destroy the killer or break the horrid curse to save humanity. She'd be covered in blood and fighting monsters with just her bare hands!
  • Cana: Who do you think would be the first to die?
  • Mystogan: Laxus. Because he'd try to play hero and get himself killed in the first five minutes of the movie.
  • Laxus: Not gonna deny that.
  • Gajeel: Actually, what IF Juvia was the source of the scary movie?
  • Juvia: You mean like the evil ghost or the serial killer?
  • Cana: Laxus, you're fucked.
  • Mira: Oh my, my! Juvia, you have to dress up like a scary ghost girl for Halloween. For me, please!
  • John: U-uhm, this is kinda letting off the trail of the question -
  • Cana: Yeah, I can kinda see Juvia being the hero but also the villain too. That would be something to see.
  • Juvia: -smiles brightly- Juvia will destroy all!
  • Gajeel: That's the spirit!
Mr. & Mrs. Smith Starters
  • "No, you're not gonna kill her."
  • "I never told you, but I was married once before."
  • "Happy endings are just stories that haven't finished yet."
  • "I guess that's what happens in the end, you start thinking about the beginning."
  • "Still alive, baby?"
  • "Your aim's as bad as your cooking sweetheart... and that's saying something!"
  • "It was just my cover, sweetheart."
  • "You obviously want me dead, and I'm less and less concerned for your well-being."
  • "Wait, why do I get the girl gun?"
  • "Any last words?"
  • "Tell me you got smart and that you killed that lying bitch."
  • "That's the second time you've tried to kill me today."
  • "Don't tell me how to handle my wife."
  • "I can't believe I brought my real parents to our wedding."
  • "It's called evasive driving, sweetheart!"
  • "Who says you were just a cover?"
  • "Oh, look. More desert."
  • "Option A; You talk, we listen, no pain. Option B; You don't talk, I remove your thumbs with my pliers, it will hurt. Option C; I like to vary the details a bit but the punchline is... you die."
  • "Tempting but I don't get out of bed for less than half a million dollars."
  • "I thought you looked like Christmas morning, I don't know how else to say it."
  • "We're going to have to re-do every conversation we've ever had."
Spiderman 3 (2007 Movie): Sentence Starters
  • "Whatever comes our way, whatever battle we have raging inside us, we always have a choice."
  • "It's the choices that make us who we are, and we can always choose to do what's right."
  • "You gonna kill me like you killed my father?"
  • "No. He despised you. You were an embarrassment to him."
  • "You took him from me. He loved me."
  • "I'm done trying to convince you."
  • "You came."
  • "We'll get you through this."
  • "I never should have hurt you... said those things."
  • "You're my friend."
  • "A couple of minutes ago wouldn't have been so bad either."
  • "Oh, my. What happened?"
  • "Looks like just in the nick of time."
  • "I don't think it's for us to say whether a person deserves to live or die."
  • "Before you know it, turn us into something ugly."
  • "Did you ever propose?"
  • "You said a husband's gotta put his wife before himself."
  • "I'm not ready."
  • "I hurt her."
  • "Well, you start by doing the hardest thing: You forgive yourself."
  • "I know what it feels like. It feels good. The power. Everything. But you'll lose yourself. It'll destroy you. Let it go."
  • "I like being bad. It makes me happy."
  • "If you know what I'm talking about!"
  • "Back then, nothing seemed to go right for me."
  • "People really like me."
  • "Stings doesn't it?"
  • "I protected you in high school. Now I'm gonna kick your little ass."
  • "You're trash."
  • "Your picture's a fake."
  • "You want forgiveness? Get religion."
  • "You are such a boy scout."
  • "We're just horsing around."
  • "I'm begging you. If you do this, I will lose everything. There's not a paper in town that will hire me."
  • "Show this to your editor."
  • "I want him dead too."
  • "Look, I want to kill the spider, you wanna kill the spider. Together, he doesn't stand a chance. Interested?"
  • "End of the line."
  • "Your wife told me to tell you to watch the anger."
  • "Time to take your pill."
  • "Hey. I'm the new guy."
  • "Um, yeah, look, just between you and me, guys kind of an amateur."
  • "From now on, I am gonna be taking shots of you for the Bugle."
  • "But you don't have to worry about that, buddy."
  • "You want a staff job, and you want a staff job, anybody care about what I want?"
  • "Shut up. Get out."
  • "Listen to me! I didn't kill your father!"
  • "You knew this was coming!"
  • "He was trying to kill me! He killed himself!"
  • "I didn't want this. But I had no choice."
  • "We always have a choice."
  • "I needed money."
  • "Why don't you just put down the gun and go home?"
  • "I realize now he was just trying to help me."
  • "I did a terrible thing to you."
  • "I spent a lot of nights wishing I could take it back."
  • "I didn't choose to be this."
  • "I'm not asking you to forgive me. I just want you to understand."
  • "How's the pie?"
  • "I'm just here to talk to you, beautiful!"
  • "Just a little something called 'Nice And Easy', what's on you?"
  • "I need a photographer."
  • "A hundred bucks?"
  • "Film's extra."
  • "Shazam!"
  • "That was OUR kiss!"
  • "It's a funny feeling, not knowing who you are."
  • "Never wound what you can't kill."
  • "Its a free country. Not a rent-free country."
  • "You will get your rent when you fix this DAM DOOR!"
  • "We can find a way to settle this."
  • "You're so right. I'm thinking... humiliation. Kind of like how you humiliated me. Do you remember? Do you remember what you did to me? You made me lose my girl. Now I'm gonna make you lose yours."
  • "How's that sound, tiger?"
  • "An orange?"
  • "I'm really sorry for what happened earlier. I shouldn't have yelled about that door. It was nothing to be angry about."
  • "This is none of your business."
  • "Do you want to push me away?"
  • "Push you away? Why would I want to push you away... I love you!"
  • "They're gonna kill us both."
  • "Your shots are so good."
  • "You don't deserve my help."
  • "Do I have any girlfriends?"
  • "This thing got any more?"
  • "She doesn't know what you are."
  • "Tell me you love me?"
  • "I know you're trying to defend your fathers' honor, but there is no question that he died by his own hand."
  • "What does it matter to you, anyway?"
  • "Hate those things!"
  • "Take your hands off me."
  • "I live in the presence of great truth."
  • "I promise I'll make you healthy again. Whatever it takes, I'll get the money."
  • "I'm not a bad person. Just had bad luck."
  • "They're my best friends... I'd give my life for them."
  • "Was I really good? I was so nervous. My knees were shaking."
  • "It's all about diffusion."
  • "The applause wasn't very loud."
  • "You are such a nerd."
  • "Where do these guys COME from?"
  • "You've taken your eye off the ball."
  • "You know, I guess one person really can make a difference."
  • "It has the characteristics of a symbiote, which needs to bond to a host in order to survive. And once it binds... it can be hard to UNbind."
  • "I love romance. I am French."
  • "You fired him."
  • "I could use some help over here!"
  • "I guess you haven't heard. I'm the sheriff around these parts!"
  • "This could be a tragic day for the people of New York."
  • "It's hard to believe what's happening. The brutality of it. I - I don't know how he can take anymore."
  • "Everybody needs help sometimes."
  • "He's a good boy. He must be in some kind of trouble."
  • "What about that amazing... amazing night that we had?"
  • "We had a coffee."
  • "Make him suffer, make him wish he were dead. First, we attack his heart!"
  • "There seems to be some kind of activity in the web."
More Great Movie Quotes [Sentence Starters]
  • "Fasten your seat belts, it's going to be a bumpy night!"
  • "____ phone home."
  • "I'm also just a girl standing in front of a boy asking him to love her."
  • "____, you're trying to seduce me. Aren't you?"
  • "Well, nobody's perfect."
  • "Round up the usual suspects."
  • "Here's another nice mess you've gotten me into!"
  • "I am Spartacus."
  • "I see dead people."
  • "If you build it, he will come."
  • "I'll have what she's having."
  • "It was beauty killed the beast."
  • "You talkin' to me?"
  • "Life is a box of chocolates, ____. You never know what you're gonna get."
  • "Nobody's perfect."
  • “You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!”
  • "I'm the king of the world!"
  • "Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room!"
  • "What we've got here is failure to communicate."
  • "There's no crying in baseball!"
  • "I'll have what she's having."
  • "One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas, I don't know."
  • "Greed, for lack of a better word, is good."
  • "Get your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape."
  • "Do you want a leg or a breast?"
  • Blaise Zabini: Oh, oh there's Tracey.
  • Hermione Granger: Who's Tracey?
  • Draco Malfoy: He's been into her, since sixth year. She used to get drunk and pass out on in front of the boys' dormitory. It was like having a hot, alcoholic cat.
  • Blaise Zabini: I'd always leave water out for her. Okay, tonight just got real. She's go on top of the 'kill list'.
  • Hermione Granger: Is that because you're going to attempt to kill her by having sex with her?
  • Blaise Zabini: More or less, yeah.
  • Hermione Granger: [sarcastically] Oh, Blaise, one day you're gonna kill the nicest girl.
The Babadook Starters
  • Ba-ba-ba... dook! Dook! DOOOOOKH!
  • You are nothing. You're nothing!
  • This is my house!
  • You are trespassing in my house!
  • If you touch my son/daughter again, I'll fucking kill you!
  • You can bring me the boy/girl
  • You can't get rid of the Babadook
  • DON'T LET IT IN!
  • I'm sick, ___. I need help.
  • We're gonna stay there tonight.
  • You want that?
  • I wanna make it up for you, ___.
  • I want you to meet your dad.
  • It's beautiful there.
  • You'll be happy.
  • Happy Birthday, sweetheart.
  • I have moved on.
  • I don't mention him.
  • I don't talk about him.
  • Why don't you go eat shit?
  • If it's in a word, or if it's in a look you can't get rid of the Babadook.
  • He wears a hat, he's tall and black
  • You better run, or he'll hold you in his locks.
  • You'll see him if you look.
  • I'm hungry.
  • If you're that hungry then go eat your shit!
  • Where did you get those fire-crackers?
  • You got them for me on the internet.
  • Well that's the end of the internet.
  • He's my father! You don't own him!
Pitch Perfect {Sentence Starters}
  • "Not a good enough reason to use the word 'penetrate.'"
  • "I set fires to feel joy."
  • "Look, just so you know, I'm not a total nerd. I also happen to be super-into close-up magic."
  • "Well... sometimes I have the feeling I can _______, but then I think, mmm... better not."
  • "No, I'm not drunk at all. You're just blurry."
  • "Even though some of you are pretty thin, you all have fat hearts, and that's what matters."
  • "I can't concentrate on anything you're saying until you cover your junk."
  • "I should have taken that cardio tip more seriously."
  • "Whomp, there it is!"
  • "Well, that's an unfortunate name."
  • "You're really drunk right now. I don't think you're gonna remember any of this."
  • "I'm gonna kill him! I'm gonna finish him like a cheesecake!"
  • "Yeah, I did! And yet, maybe I didn't, because I got hit by flying Mexican food."
  • "I think I have something that could help us."
  • "I have a feeling we should kiss. Is that a good feeling or an incorrect feeling?"
  • "Excuse me b*tch, you don't need to shout."
  • "Nothing makes a woman feel more like a girl than a man who sings like a boy."
  • "That's not a real word but keep trying. You. Will. Get. There."
  • "I've wrestled crocodiles and dingoes simultaneously."
  • "Leave it. It fuels my hate fire."
  • Cami: You have a weapon across the river ready to be fired. Use it.
  • Klaus: *visits Marcel & asks for his help*
  • Cami: Ask me to dance
  • Klaus: *dances with Cami*
  • Cami: Wait inthe car, I'll be right back.
  • Klaus: *waits in the car*
  • Cami: Oh shut up! I'm so mad at you I can hardly speak!
  • Klaus: *shuts up*
  • Cami: Under no circumstances are you to harm that girl.
  • Klaus: You have my word
  • Cami: You're not gonna kill this kid.
  • Klaus: Fine, go get the car.
  • Cami: Maybe we could go for a walk? Get some fresh air.
  • Klaus: *goes and sits in an outdoor cafe w/ Cami*
  • Klamille Shippers: Klaus baby you are so in love.
"Things My Roommates Have Said" Starters Part 2
  • "It's one in the morning! You can't just knock on people's door and ask them if they know some random cat"
  • "But how much do they know about The Great Japanese Professional Baseball Crisis of 2004?"
  • "If there's knocks on the back door always answer with a knife in hand"
  • "When you date tall people they just get all the top shelves to themselves"
  • "You're like my wife, except we don't have sex and have no romantic interest in each other"
  • "Our band is gonna be nothing but silence and the occasional agonizing scream"
  • "MICE SHOT OUT OF MY PRINTER!!"
  • "Vodka gives me useless noodle arms"
  • "Math killed my father"
  • "Bro I saw your dad yesterday"
  • "You see, I'm an asshole, but I'm also a terrible person"
  • "Why are old white people offended by three girls raising a toddler together?"
  • "You went to bed so we turned the living room into a fort"
  • "We're not being haunted, I had gregorian chanter music playing"
  • "I'm not paying for an ambulance, just push me to hospital on a skateboard or something"
  • "I don't think my hair is 'screaming gay' enough yet"
  • "You left your vibrator in the bathroom sink again"
Heathers: The Musical Sentence Starters (Act 2)
  • **SOME OF THESE AREN'T EXACT QUOTES FOR THE SAKE OF THEM WORKING FOR MOST PEOPLE**:
  • "There has been a lack of girls climbing in my bedroom window lately"
  • "My teenage angst bull shit has a body count"
  • "Jesus says it's cool"
  • "That was one hell of a fishing trip"
  • "What is that smell in the air? Is that tolerance?"
  • "You don't have to be so smug about it"
  • "This ends right here, right now. Or I'll break up with you."
  • "Fine. We're damaged. But that does not make us wise"
  • "Let's be normal, see bad movies. Sneak a beer and watch TV"
  • "Don't you want a life with me?"
  • "And you're right, it really blows"
  • "Don't stop looking in my eyes"
  • "if you could let me in, I could be good with you"
  • "So what's it gonna be? I wanna be with you tonight"
  • "You're love is too good to lose"
  • "'And they lived happily ever after' You really believe that? You think it's all goes back to normal?"
  • "You know exactly what he is, and you love it."
  • "I think they were murdered."
  • "Well fuck me genitally with a chainsaw"
  • "Nancy Drew is on to you."
  • "It looks like she's going to lady prison"
  • "This is a pretty wild theory..."
  • "My heart knows the truth!"
  • "He didn't write that love note. I did."
  • "The whole school was in on the joke."
  • "Don't you trust him?"
  • "Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast?"
  • "I'm ending our affair"
  • "It might be a bad time to say I faked it every time"
  • "The last guy I slept with killed himself because he was gay for the linebacker.."
  • "Well who made her captain"
  • "You don't deserve to wear our school colors"
  • "You said you would protect her!"
  • "Stupid child proof caps!!"
  • "You're gonna die alone"
  • "If everyone jumped off a bridge, would you?"
  • "If you were happy every single day of your life, you wouldn't be human. You'd be a game show host."
  • "Why are you carrying a gun?"
  • "Where did you get these pictures?"
  • ".....And then he woke up"
  • "He kissed me quick"
  • "He was mine until we his first grade"
  • "Certain boys are for kindergarten, certain girls are meant to be alone."
  • "Why are you pulling my dick? It was your boyfriends idea."
  • "Just another geek trying to imitate the popular people and failing miserably"
  • "You've earned that red shrunchie"
  • "I'll scream and my parents will call the police."
  • "Come out and get dressed. you're my date to the pep rally!"
  • "It's guaranteed they won't see their senior prom"
  • "I was meant to be yours. We were meant to be one"
  • "I can't make it alone"
  • "you were all I could trust"
  • "I'm sorry for being a horrible person"
  • "No one here deserves to die, except for me and the monster I created"
  • "One more dance and than fair well"
  • "Got no time to talk, I'm a dead girl walkin'"
  • "I'd hardly call this a bomb"
  • "I wish your mom had been a little stronger, I wish she'd stayed around a little longer."
  • "I wish you'd come with me"
  • "I wish I had more TNT"
  • "The irony of this is that I never got to write my own suicide note."
  • "I respectfully disagree"
  • "But you aren't beyond repair."
  • "You beat me fair and square"
  • "Hope you miss me, I wish you'd kiss me, then you know I worship you."
  • "Say 'Hi' to god."
  • "You look like hell"
  • "Yeah, I just got back."
  • "Brand new sheriff come to town"
  • "My date for the pep rally kinda blew...me off"
  • "Are there any happy endings?"
  • "High school may not ever end"
  • "One day we'll change the world, but let kick back tonight"
  • "Let take off our clothes and dance"
  • "Maybe we won't grow old and then we'll never die"
  • "We'll make it beautiful"

I’m so going to die for this but imagine you’re the top student in Biology and Jack is your hot young teacher and you take a test and end up making a C on it even though you studied really hard so you go up to Jack after class and ask him if there’s a chance that he could possibly raise her grade to an A or let her retake the test and he just peers at you through his glasses and stands to his feet before taking off his red button-up and throwing it on the floor and he walks up to you and leans into your ear and whispers, “You know something? I’ll make a deal with you. I will give you your A—on one condition.” And you nod quickly for him to continue and he smirks before saying, “I want you to take off those yoga pants of yours and underwear; and then I want you to sit on top of my desk, legs spread. If you don’t oblige, I’m keeping your C. And we both know you don’t want that. So it’s your choice.” And you’re nervous but you decide your grade is worth it and you’ve always had a crush on Jack so you take off your yoga pants and underwear, letting your oversized hoodie hang midway down your thighs and you sit on top of Jack’s desk, watching carefully as he closes the blinds and locks the door, covering the window with paper and tape, and when he’s done, he glides back over to you and runs a hand through your hair while the other hand lightly presses against your wet heat and you whimper quietly and Jack shushes you before lightly biting on your earlobe and then lowering himself onto his knees and breathing cool air against your clit and and your eyes flutter closed as you throw your head back and Jack says, “No sound or I’ll keep your C. Understand?” And you make eye contact with his deep blue, dilated eyes before he finally kitten licks up your throbbing center and your hand tangles into his wild blond hair and he moans lowly against you and the vibrations move up your body and you begin to shake in anticipation and pleasure and Jack smirks and says, “Be a good girl for me and you’ll get your A, ok, princess?”

I AM SO SCREWED FOR THIS BYE

Spot the Difference #5,436: Core Four Bullying Edition
  • Farkle Gets Bullied (is told he doesn't deserve his friends, gets called a "nothing")
  • Riley: It's not okay that someone called you that.
  • Maya: *itching to beat someone up*
  • Lucas: *nearly beats someone up*
  • Riley: *basically takes over class to run an anti-bullying workshop on Farkle's behalf*
  • Farkle: wears the SHIT out of his turtleneck at the awards ceremony, along with everyone else. So there.
  • Riley Gets Bullied (is told to "stop being you," gets threatened with violence)
  • Farkle: *first one to make Riley smile, first one to figure out what's up*
  • Maya: *lets Riley take it out on her with basically no complaints*
  • Lucas: *itching to beat someone up*
  • Zay: Y'all are rude climbing through windows like this.
  • Riley: *confronts her bully and says she's gonna be herself SO THERE*
  • Lucas Gets Bullied (is called a disgrace, told he put the family in the mud-hole, gets mocked and shamed for something that happened to him as a little kid)
  • Maya: *thinks Lucas and Riley are nuts for listening to these people, tries to get him to stay safe*
  • Farkle: *crickets*
  • Zay: You'll be great. (Truth: You're gonna die).
  • Riley: Better do what these people calling you a disgrace want even though it's crazy dangerous, but that's okay because I believe (despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary) that you couldn't possibly get hurt!
  • Lucas: Well, I don't actually WANT to ride this 2,000 lb bull which could easily kill or maim me, but since these people are calling me a disgrace I guess I have no choice but to cave to what they all want. That's definitely the more rational option versus standing up for myself and not risking my neck on an unnecessary stunt. Yup. Totally.