you will get where you always dreamed to be

Heart Hoping

I stay

Day dreaming .

I’m always

midnight scheming.

I get nervous searching

For the deeper

meaning In this life.

I keep my arms

wide open.

My mind rocks

back and forth,

Like a sailboat

in the ocean.

Just trying to get wind

Of where I’m going.

In those times

it feels,

Like realities frozen.

I kindle my flame

from within,

I remind myself

of how I’m doing right

By my fathers name for him.


Yes I know

best sometimes,

Life can be slow motion.

But that doesn’t mean

It’s knocked you off

the course

You’ve spent

a lifetime going.

Keep your head clear,

Your chin high,

And your heart hoping.

i have thought a lot about censorship and what is “appropriate”. not a lot of people know this, but lolita was written to show what we allow on our bookshelves: there being no swear words in it meant it was free from censorship. a book about child molestation was allowed because it didn’t explicitly use the word “fuck”. he wrote it to show we don’t really care about protecting children, and it ended up being seen as a romance.

someone once told me - actually, many people have - that lgbt content isn’t appropriate for children. any content. not just kissing. i’m drowned in questions: “won’t the parents have to explain it?” “kids shouldn’t be thinking about sex at this age, or do you think differently?” “what will the kids think?”

at six i saw disney movies. people kiss and get married. i didn’t ask “what does that mean.” i didn’t ask “are those people going to have sex?” i didn’t ask anything, because i was six, and no six year old thinks twice about these things. nobody ever “explained” being straight to me, it was a fact, and it existed, and i was fine with that. why would being gay require a thesis, i wonder.

someone once told me that the one of the reasons people hate lgbt individuals is because they can’t see us as anything but sexual. we’re not people, so much as sinners. that they don’t see love, they see sex. just sex. it’s perversion, not a matter of the heart. only of the body.

i think i was in my early twenties before i saw someone like me. 

how old were you, though, before you saw violence? before you saw sexual assault on tv? i think something like that is only pg-13, and if it’s implied, they can get away with anything. i remember watching things and learning about blood, but knowing sex - sex was what was really wrong. sex was always rated r. sex was always kind of a bad word. i was told a lot that i wasn’t ready.

i had a dream last night that i made a site where people could ask any question they wanted about sex and get answered by a professional. it was shut down in moments because 15 year olds wanted to know if it should hurt, if “double-bagging” was a real thing, if this, if that. we shudder. don’t let the children know about that! 

but at thirteen i had seen enough violence it no longer struck me. i couldn’t say “fuck” but i knew that if you break your femur, you can bleed out internally in under half an hour. in school i wasn’t allowed to write about loving girls because what would the administration think - but i could write about wanting to kill myself and people would say how lovely, how blistering.

i have thought a lot about censorship. sometimes people on this site try it with me: don’t write this, don’t be so nasty. some of it is intrinsic. we know as people with a uterus not to complain about “that time of the month”, we know better than to talk about sexual assault (how shameful), we know that talking about a vagina is somehow scandalous. i can say “dick” and nobody questions me. some people only refer to the bottom half of me by “pussy”. they won’t wrap a mouth around “vagina” like it’s poison to them. even discussing this, that the language halts, that there’s an intrinsic desire to say “girls” instead of “women” - feels naughty, illicit. not for children.

the other day someone suggested i make my blog 18+. i said, okay, it deals a lot with depression and other problems that might be for a mature audience. oh no, they said, that’s not it, i think that’s helpful. i said, okay. so what is it then. well, you’re gay. you write about loving women. and i said, i don’t write about sex often and they said. it’s not about the sex. but wlw isn’t for a general audience. teenagers aren’t ready.

oh.

lolita is recommended for high school and up. i think about that a lot. i know girls who love it, who say it speaks to them on a deep level. it’s beautiful prose, after all. that was the whole point of the novel. something that looked like a rose but was intrinsically awful. i think about how if i was a model they’d want me to look young, thin, prepubescent. how my body would be sold and how through the mall i walk by images of barely-clothed women while mothers cannot breastfeed in public without fear of retribution. 

i think about how i can write a novel about violence and it will be pg-13 but if my characters say “fuck” twice it’s inappropriate. i said fuck three times so far in this post, which makes it only appropriate for adults. 

i think about that, and how my identity is something that people suggest lines up with a swear word. that people shouldn’t talk about it. that it’s a vulgarity. bad for children, harsh, confusing.

fuck. i love women. which one makes this only for those over eighteen.

Happy Asks 💫

Sunrises: What is something you are looking forward to?

Honeybees: What is something you have done recently that you are proud of? It can be anything at all, even just waking up every morning.

Roller skating: What are your hobbies?

Stars: What are your favorite blogs?

Poppy flowers: What are your favorite flowers?

Lemonade: What is the sweetest thing anyone has every done for you?

Dogs: What do you look for in friends?

Painting: If you could dye your hair any color, what would it be?

Smiles: What is the greatest compliment you have ever received? What is a compliment you wish someone would give you?

Fairy lights: If someone wanted to get to know you, what should they read/watch/listen to?

Dancing: Describe your dream date.

Rainbows: What always makes you feel better when you’re sad?

Beaches: If you could go anywhere in the world, right this moment, where would you go?

Cats: What do you like to do on lazy days?

Sunflowers: What do you want other people to think of you?

Laughter: List 5 things that make you happy.

Balloons: When do you feel most like yourself?

Daisies: What is your favorite quote?

Trees: Name one thing you have learned this past year that has made you a better person?

Polaroids: What is your favorite thing about yourself?

Sunsets: If you could paint the sky any colors, what would they be?

How to Become His Dream Girl, Even if You’re Not (A Spoiled GF Guide)

so recently, within the past 2 months I have successfully become a spoiled gf, this (surprisingly) was a whole lot easier than I thought it would be, but using this technique (that I kind if made up) I broke it down into some simple steps :)

STEP ONE: Pick someone you wont mind spending a considerable amount of time with

- Realize that this isn’t a sugar daddy, this man wants to have a full on relationship with you, therefore you will be spending a large amount of time with him so you WILL HAVE TO DEAL WITH HIM. So just make sure that he is someone you can handle without wanting to strangle after 45 minutes.


STEP TWO: Charm the fuck out of him, then have him open up to you

- You have to make him want you, be alluring and kind. smile at him, laugh at his jokes, compliment him on shit that you might not even care about. Right now you are selling a prophecy, an introduction to a relationship. Make yourself sound as interesting as possible but leave him always wanting more, always have him talk about himself more than you talk about yourself. try to pick up on little things and get a read on his emotional status and how he chooses to react to certain situations, learn about him so you can mold yourself into his dream woman. Once he sees your “genuine” interest in him, he will start opening up to you and THIS is where you’ll really need to pay attention.


STEP THREE: Find out what intimate part of his life is missing

- THIS IS KEY LADIES AND GENTLEMAN!!! You will have to figure out what relationship related snippet is really missing. In my case my sugar boyfriend (ill call him T) was married for 10+ years and never really got what he wanted out of the marriage and was constantly lied to, but ended up staying on behalf of his 4 step kids. after getting divorced he dated a stripper who just used him for his money even though he supposedly had “genuine” feelings for her. After learning about his tragic love history I came to the conclusion that what he really needed out of a relationship was mutual affection and to feel valued. KEEP IN MIND, THIS STEP CAN TAKE A WHILE AND INCLUDES LOTS OF TRIAL AND ERROR. So after coming up with my hypothesis of the lack of value and affection, I decided to put it to the test and did 2 simple things in order to do so. first, while he was at work, I called him to see how his day was going. You would have thought I was god himself calling because he was so happy to hear from me and to hear that I was thinking about him and that I took the time out to call him and let him know that. Second, I cooked him dinner. One day while I was staying at his house I decided to surprise him with a very basic meal (frozen salmon fillets and sautéed bell peppers) and yet again, he was so happy and excited at the fact that I had done that for him. This is when I knew I was on the home stretch


STEP FOUR: Focus on the missing intimate piece, and make it your specialty

- This is what has him keep you around, doing the things that he needed but never got. don’t get me wrong, I’m not cooking this man dinner everyday, instead I switch it up and substitute certain actions. He loves affection, so when we’re sitting on the couch together ill lay my head on his lap, or hold his hand and stroke the side of his face. I’ve learned that simple shit like that makes him incredibly happy, which makes him incredibly generous.


STEP FIVE: Get Spoiled

- Now after giving him a taste of life with you in it, you need to give him a taste of how much your life costs. By now he’s showered you in nice dinners and gifts on the whim, but you’re here for the kill, you want a access to the finances and for him to get you whatever you want. For me, this was by far the easiest step out of all of them, I told him I wanted to go shopping and that I needed some stuff from Lush and Sephora (he had no idea what either of those places were) AND HERE IS WHERE YOU GET HIM. Make sure he sees how expensive it is just to be you, talk to him about your favorite products and what you need and use on the daily (hype them up in price too, like if you need foundation and you usually use L'Oréal, rave about the Gorgio Armani foundation instead) make it seem like your mere existence is expensive, by now this man wants to take care of you and wants to keep you in his life and therefore will do what it takes to keep you near and dear. Once he see’s how “hard” it is to be you, he will make it easier



At this point in my relationship with T, I am nearly moved into his house and have full usage of his ex-wife’s Lexus and his credit card, and tomorrow I get to meet his mother. Once you get on the right path of knowing what a man is missing in this life, you’ll be able to use that to your advantage and have him truly believe that you’re the woman of his dreams, even if you’re just a Faux Heaux :)

{Future}
  • Aries: You'll be as bright as the sun and make the most difficult choices in your life soon. Chin up, spit the blood, and fight for your beliefs.
  • Cancer: Maybe things seem pretty rough right now. Think about what you want for the long run, maybe it's not what you want now. Where are you in 10 years?
  • Taurus: You're always so nervous and tedious about your work. You know what? If you're trying to impress something or someone to get what you want, maybe it's not for you. Because if you're not doing what you love to impress people, screw that. Do what you want.
  • Gemini: Oh boy. You have no idea. You have such big dreams and so little time. Go with what you want and don't let anybody get in the way of it. You're really never late to anything. There's time, just a limited amount.
  • Leo: Summer down, maybe your dream when you were little won't work. Maybe it will, who knows? The thing is, don't live your life in solitude, find someone to adventure with and show your colors.
  • Virgo: My dear, don't be afraid of society's rules, they're meant to be broken. Prove your point. Be an example. Break the glass.
  • Libra: You've been told what to do and how to do it for too long. Stop obeying and start pioneering your own future. Dream for yourself.
  • Scorpio: You think you have it all figured out don't you? Just know that life throws curveballs all the time. Be ready for anything darling.
  • Sagittarius: Maybe you don't know. Maybe you know. You're in the dark yet you see light. I promise it will become clear for you one day when you probably least expect it.
  • Capricorn: You're ambitious but not supported. I'm sorry. Put yourself in a healthy group of people and environment and you'll grow as fast as time passes.
  • Aquarius: You can not see the future and there are things you won't be able to predict. Stop trying so hard and let go. You'll find your success elsewhere. Don't expect a pretty platter of success to be handed to you.
  • Pisces: You fall but you need to get back up. Don't loose sight of what's important to you and your journey. You've grown so much in this period of time. Keep it up and success will be great.
Big List of Fantroll Facts from Hiveswap

This is all pulled straight from the game with 0 (or attempted 0) bias from me or @peckonthecheek

We have both played the game so I can verify several things on the list. Most of the information comes from @peckonthecheek​ who exhaustively did everything in the game and recorded useful information.

If you want to add to this post, feel free to screenshot what you want to add and send it to me!

Keep reading

Brutally Honest Venus in Houses

Venus in House I
Aren’t you miss Marilyn Monroe? You present yourself to the world with charm and cuteness and get stuff on your way like that. You’re very flirty and love to play dumb so stupid people thinking they’re too smart will lecture you and you will even get out of the situation pretending you’re a good learner when in fact you’re just being diplomatic and shady. You like to be sexually admired and know how to use it in your favor without being obvious. How not to like you? Not even you know that.

Venus in House II
Here comes Lana del Rey in her Sugar Baby phase. Maybe is not even conscious but your love life has to be luxurious and you will probably fall for rich people - not that you are actively looking for this kind of thing. To you, romantic means financial effort, and if they care enough they will do it for you, right? Also you’re pretty obsessed with stability. Love comes with a price, and you won’t marry and put your being in the hands of someone who can’t even pay its own bills. Maybe you have a heritage or come from a wealthy family, and you will keep at least the same pattern of life you already have with someone stable that knows how to $ enjoy $ life.

Venus in House III
You probably fell in love for a teacher once. You just can’t resist a sweet talk and somebody that can share stories, knowledge, with good humor and a mind sharp… you’re so done. You also like to be with someone that can talk about anything without making a big deal of it, and if they don’t have anything interesting to say anymore you get bored and that’s it, the end. Also because of your endless need for new information and learning you may feel polyamory is something considerable, maybe even desirable. So many people with so many stories to share! Or maybe not, if you date a true nerd with a good heart. Is very likely you will find romance in school or college, or any study group, and maybe inspire you to follow an academic or scholar career.

Venus in House IV
You are very, very, very romantic and sentimental. Love means marrying and children, or at least marrying and having loving pets to raise. Sometimes both. You like the traditional bound - you may even say is not for you but honey, you don’t fool anyone. You like the idea of having a ring in your finger and showing off your sweet partner while making up names for your future children (or pets). You probably came from a family that gave you this traditional view - or from a so fucked up family you desired your whole life yours were better than that and decided to make your new family the closest thing possible from a traditional one. Either way, you will look for someone that can handle your family or be among the other half’s family as it were yours. And you are a hard worker to keep things as perfect as a butter advertise.

Venus in House V
You are so in love… with yourself. And everything you create. You are expressive and people love your presence - they better do, you’re a fucking genius - and you know how to attract people, how to flirt, how to keep them interested. Is like they say: work on your garden and the butterflies will come to you, and geez, your garden is a stage with high quality lightning while Mozart plays in the background to make the flowers grow more beautifully. You work on your appearance, on your expressiveness, you know exactly what you’re doing and those who don’t know how to appreciate it are not worthy of you. Your partner is someone you picked from your fans, they must admire you too - better saying, they have to understand what you are and what you do. Otherwise why even bother to lose your time with them? Losers.

Venus in House VI
You love someone who is responsible and hard working. Love to you is something a bit colder than others, you have high standards for what you want in your life and need someone to help you achieve it. This someone must work as hard as you do, must cooperate with you and stand still facing critics because you’re really mental, and your relationship is one of the things you will analyze more than feel it. The problem is you might over analyze it and ruin things when they were supposed to be ok. Chill, man. You do a good work, trust your standards, you will do fine. And so will the person you coldly chose to be with you. You will probably fall in love for a competent co-worker, maybe even your boss, or someone with a very practical view.

Venus in House VII
You’re the Venus itself. You’re a social butterfly and diplomatic af, everybody likes you and you don’t even give them the chance to not like you. You’re so fucking nice and loving, how can they not like you? Unless you have a stellium in aries or something, geez, you’re good at attracting people. You will probably fall in love for pretty people, be pretty yourself and want pretty things surrounding you. You’re all about beauty - inner and outer, but c'mon, everybody likes the outer more. You’re well behaved, gentle, you talk looking into people’s eyes and genuinely asks if everything is ok. You will probably marry and be very happy since the person that will be attracted to you will admire every piece of you, and feel lucky to have you around. Just run from people that use other people (they might perceive you’re too nice and use the shit out of you) and creeps (they might see your kindness as openness and try to do creepy shit).

Venus in House VIII
The more complicated, the better. Not because of drama, you just like… intense things. Normal relationships bore the shit out of you, you need something that will change your life completely, change the way you see things, you feel things, someone that can divide your life in “Before my partner” and “After my partner”. Someone to do new things, develop new dreams, and someone to take care emotionally and trust completely. You’re not the type of going around telling everyone you’re in love - sometimes you don’t even feel it coming. Is just there, and then you want that person all for you, in a very possessive way, and do everything to mark your territory without being obvious. You like mysterious people, or just really different people, because they will make you feel beyond the obvious and share dark secrets - the ultimate love proof for you. You may have a thing for people you shouldn’t - be the other person, or even cheat. You also are a bit traditional… but a darker version, like Morticia and Gomez - to die and kill for it. Partners in life, partners in crime. Usually in life, though, if you’re healthy.

Venus in House IX
You want to PaAaARtYy. Woohoo. You have energy, passion, attitude, and you fall for very optimistic people that will take you out of your comfort zone and go beyond with you. You might fall for college teachers and researchers, maybe people that traveled the world, or even high knowledged religion leaders, like priests. Or just a parter for crazy ideas. To you, a relationship must be something to add flavor and spice to your life and make it something incredible. Make you do incredible things, go to places you never - or always - dreamed of. The ultimate romance is to take you in a trip where you will experiment so many new things and cultures. You’re all about expansion and your love will take you beyond, make you learn something new, master a new technique… love is something almost religious that will bring you salvation. The problem is when you notice the patterns of things and get bored, or if your beloved is passing through dark times of regression. You feel lonely and that energy becomes irritation, and you may go alone with hope to find new love since you have no time for sad people.

Venus in House X
You’re the boss here. You know exactly what you want for love, and this comes with traditionalism, effort and a good status. You like the idea of marrying and having kids but indifferently from your gender you will be the “man” of the house, the boss. You will lead the relationship, take the initiative, ask to go on a date, decide when to marry, choose where to live, what to do, how to do. You are very hard working and security is important to you - and if the person doesn’t give you enough of it you will just fire them and leave the spot open to better candidates. You may seem cold but you don’t play with your life and love is something strong for you, so you just don’t give it for anyone that messes with your head. You actually know very well the difference between love and lust and are able to have lustful relationships without love, just to relieve your carnal needs. Cold, right? But real. You take responsibilities and obligations very seriously, and if you decide to bond with someone you will do it in the right way.

Venus in House XI
You’re popular and care about everyone. When it comes to love you have to find someone that will bond with your friends and coworkers. You go along with everybody and important people tend to like you. You may get involved with someone very political, or with strong political views, particularly with the power to actually do something for the masses. Or maybe a technologic nerd that is developing solutions for daily problems. You’re all about improvement and will want someone to share this view, and work together to something that will help others somehow. You’re here to make things better and your partner must recognize this. You don’t fall a little tiny for selfish bastards, even if they look pretty af - at this point you’re probably questioning the beauty standards and laughing at people that tries too hard to look good. You’re different, unique, and sometimes this is a blessing, sometimes a curse. You know you’re out of the place and fall for smart all of the place people like you. And if your morals and political views matches you will probably going to die together, holding hands and shit.

Venus in House XII
Your love is unconscious. You’re dreamy and imagine a life together with an ideal you’re afraid it doesn’t exist. This may indicate your love is in a past life too, someone you’ve bond so strongly you miss him/her and don’t even know its face. Your love makes you better as a person, grow and learn more about you. You might feel you’re infantile and this is so strange for you, while it seems so obvious for others, and will want to hide and never try. You’re too ashamed to show your feelings and always expect the worst, sometimes making a self fulfilled prophecy, and then going after easy escapes such drugs, games, porn. Bonding is specially hard for you because that’s what you need most to grow, and growing is never easy. You might break up as soon as you realize the person is not what you wanted it to be, not wanting to deal with their problems. Don’t run. You’re lovely and you can make your big dreams come true if you stay and keep on trying. Or at least the closest thing to true, which is fantastic anyway, because you’re a fabulous dreamer and that’s a great gift.

“Like what you see?”(MATURE)

“…but I was thinking, maybe we should-Hello, the earth is calling Y/N. Anyone home?” Justin waved his hands in front of Y/N’s face. She quickly focused her eyes on his face. “Mhm?” she mumbled.

“Where did I lose you?” he asked curiously, wondering what was on her mind. They were discussing which movie they’re going to watch.

“Um, you were saying something about, um, the girl on the train? You said you would like to watch it, since you liked the book so much.” she spoke unsurely, wondering if he even spoke of that. She knows they had that conversation few days ago, but did he mentioned it today, she wasn’t certain.

As a respond he giggled. She joined him, she loved when he would giggle, his eyes would nearly shut, his smile would grow so big and the sound was just like an angel was laughing.

“So I’ve lost you like three days ago. I didn’t even mentioned it today. FYI I was telling you about this new movie “Don’t Breath”, but now I’m very interested what was on your mind.” His smile grew even wider, he looked like he caught her in some kind of embarrassing action, and he actually did, without even knowing. She could feel hotness spreading around her face, she knew she looked as red as a tomato. She buried her face into her palms.

That made Justin giggle even more. “Oh don’t tell me that you were picturing me naked?” he wiggled his eyebrows. He knew it would make her blush even more, and he just couldn’t resist but tease her. “You know, you could’ve just asked, I would even put a show for you.”

She immediately lifted her head up and yelled giggling “NO” her cheeks were dark red. She once again covered her face.

“So you don’t want me to put on a show for you?” Justin placed his left hand over his chest, pretending he’s hurt. “I am deeply offended, Y/N.”

He couldn’t keep a straight face, not around her. She was just so embarrassed, it was the cutest thing ever. He extended his arms to her. “Come”

She shyly moved from her place on the couch and sat onto his lap. She buried her face into crotch of his neck. He chuckled once again, and so did she. “Now will you tell me what you were thinking about, if it wasn’t me naked?”

She took a deep breath. She had some thoughts on this, and how to explain it to him, without him getting hurt. She moved her face from his neck and looked deeply into his eyes. By now, his face wasn’t all giggly and happy anymore, it was rather serious.

“Y/N, what is it? You’re scaring me.” he looked concerned. She placed her hands on his chest and started playing with the shirts fabric.

“No, no, it’s nothing that serious, you don’t have to be worried. I just. Ugh, I don’t know how to say this. You know I’m not good at this things.” His face lightened up a little bit.

“So you where picturing me naked.”

“No I was not.”

“Well then you were picturing us having sex.” Her cheeks went red once again. “So you were. You know you don’t have to picture something like that when I’m right there.” He got closer to her. She knew where this was leading and she had nothing against it, but it was now or never.

She lightly pushed him back down, and he looked at her confused. He wanted to say something but she cut him off.

“Technically, yes I was picturing us naked, but there was more to it.” Her eyes once more focused on her hands rather than his eyes. He could tell that he was very intrigued by now, and he wanted to know more than just that.

“So what was that more?” his voice became lower. He’s words came out like a little growl, which only sent shivers down her spine. He could feel she tensed above him. “Tell me, baby, what was I doing?”

She was always so shy about this kind of things, and she knew she won’t be able to tell him her fantasy, but she can avoid it by a simple question which should clarify everything.

“What kinks do you have?” now for him, that question came out of nowhere and it shocked him. Justin was staring at her, not sure why she was changing the subject.

“Look, you know I suck at dirty talk. Stop giggling, I wasn’t making a dirty joke.” She lightly punched his shoulder. “You’re not helping.”

“Oh come here my embarrassed baby.” He got closer once again and their lips met for a quick peck. Once they separated she started again. “You have to know one thing, by all of this I am not saying that our sex life is bad, at least not for me. It’s amazing but I just feel like something is missing. So I wanna know what gets you off, what do you like.”

He didn’t know what to say, she caught him off-guard. He observed her and she just couldn’t take the silence anymore. “Fine I’ll start. Um, I like rough sex, and by that I mean everything that goes with it, choking, tying up, ass slapping, blindfolding, and usage of toys. I like it when a man knows how to treat a woman, how to be a dominant but at the same time caring and loving.”

He looked at her like she was someone else, he had no idea where that came from. She was always so shy telling him about her sex dream or simple dirty talk during sex, so it shook him up.

He cleaned his throat and shifted in his sat, he was getting hot from her recent confession. “So that’s what you really like, baby girl? Is that what you want me to do?” Justin got closer to her, she could feel her heart beating faster. She bit her lip and simply nodded.

He placed his left hand on her back and twirled her around so she was laying on the couch and he was hovering her. She separated her legs and wrapped them around his waist. He brought his face closer to hers, but never touching hers.

Suddenly he got up from her, she was confused. He offered her his left arm and she took it. He pulled her of the couch. Their faces met once again, but he didn’t make a move. “Since you like being tied up, I can’t fuck the living shit out of you down here where I can’t tie you up to anything.”

He guided her up to their shared room, and with every step was feeling more and more horny. Once they were inside, Justin pushed her against the bedroom door. She gasped from sudden harshness, but it only made her hornier.

“Tonight I don’t want to hear a sound from you, unless I gave you permission. Understood?” Justin growled into her ear. She felt unexpected heat spreading across her body. She nodded, she wasn’t able to answer his question. But he wasn’t pleased with that.

His left hand found her neck and squeezed it, first, lightly, then adding more force. “Understood?” he inquired loudly. “Yes” she mumbled.

“Yes, what?” he repeated after her.

“Yes, daddy.”

He lighten his grip only to lock his lips with hers. She expected it to be a rough and fast kiss, but he wasn’t hurrying anywhere. It annoyed her, she wanted to feel him, and she wanted him to just take her, without any foreplay. But she knew she wasn’t getting that.

His hands were moving up and down her body, but once hers found the back of his head, he jacked the off and held them up, above her head. It only made her moan into the kiss.

He freed her lips and placed kisses all over her chin. She knew what he was doing, and he knew the exact effect he had on her. “Please, Justin.”

All of the sudden he stopped, his grip became tighter. He looked into her eyes, his voice was low and steady. “I don’t recall giving you a permission to speak. Do that one more time and I will stop.” She bit her lip and tried to hold in a moan.

He freed her hands only to rip her shirt off. She wouldn’t be able to describe how hot and weak it made her when he ripped it, she wanted to moan, all frustrated. He took what remained of the shirt in one hand, while he used his other one to guide her to the bed. When her legs hit the end of the bed, he demanded. “Bra off, lay on your back, hands above your head.”

She listened, but she took the chance to tease him as much as he was teasing her. She slowly reached behind her back, she pretended to be struggling with her bra. He clenched his jaw and stepped closer. He didn’t even warn her, he just ripped it off and pushed her onto bed. She crawled to the top of the bed, she obediently laid on her back placing her hands above her head, meeting the coldness of headboard.

Justin seemed pleased, as he got onto bed, placing his knees on either side of her body, slowly making his way up to her, slowly rolling her shirt in his hands. Once he reached her, his crotch was directly in front of her and she couldn’t help but bite her lip.

“You like what you see?” he asked taking her hands in his and wrapping her shirt around her hands. He continued, never stopping to look down at her. “Now, this will have to work today, but next time, baby girl, you’re gonna be properly handcuffed. I promise you that.” He tighten the knot, making sure it was at the same time tight enough, but not way to tight.

He backed away a little bit, he lowered himself, so his face was at the same height as hers. They looked at each other, and Y/N just couldn’t take it anymore. She just wanted to feel his touch, his lips all over her body, his hands working their way up and down her inner thigh, his tongue circling around her clit, and lastly his dick inside of her.

She moved her head up but he was faster and backed away, only a little bit but enough far so she couldn’t reach him. He smirked at her while she let out a sigh. It seemed like he wasn’t hurrying anywhere, but Y/N was just about to explode. “Ugh, please Justin. Stop teasing.” She whined out.

The sound of her voice made Justin back away. He wiggled his left finger “That’s a no-no. What did I say? Speak one more time and I will stop. Do you really want me to stop? No? Then I will have to get those pretty little mouth occupied, won’t I?”

Justin got off the bed, still not hurrying anywhere. He stood on the left side of the bed, slowly undoing his kaki jeans. He used the opportunity to take his shirt off, shoes and Calvin Klein boxers. Y/N’s eyes never let his out of sight, observing every inch of his body, memorizing the little stuff.

“Like what you see?” Justin inquired. As a respond, she let out a loud moan. “Isn’t it funny that, when you have a permission to talk you don’t, but when you don’t, you do? You like being bad? Trust me I can treat you like a bad girl any time you want.” He growled, slowly getting onto bed, taking the same position as before.

He took his dick into his hand and placed it in front of her mouth. “Suck.” But he didn’t need to tell her twice. She took him into her mouth, as much as she could and started sucking onto it. His mouth felt open, as her eyes never left his eyes. “Fuck, just like that.”

She would gladly go slow and tease him, but she wasn’t able to take it slow. She picked her pace, sucking and licking. He grabbed her hair “So you wanna be a bad girl? Then, don’t suck a dick like a good girl.” With those words he pushed her head all the way to his pubic hair. She gaged at the sudden at the feeling of his whole dick in her mouth.

“That’s right take it all.” He roughly pushed her head back and forth, and every time she could feel the tip of his dick hitting the back of her throat. She could feel her drool all over her neck and chest.

“How selfish of me. You’re here all hot and wet, and all I think about is my pleasure.” He pulled out, heavy breathing.

“Are you wet for me? Or are you dripping?” he asked, slowly backing away so he was placed in between her legs. “Well, let’s find out.”

He harshly pressed his right hand on her pussy, rubbing her clit through her panties. She let out a loud moan of relief, finally feeling his touch. “Ohhoho.” He said excitedly. “Someone is dripping wet.”

He pulled her panties off, lowering his head, and without a warning connecting his lips with her clit. Y/N moaned loudly, throwing her head into the pillow and pushing her hips up. Justin placed his hands around her legs, separating them to get into better position.

“So delicious.” He growled against her, which send shiver all over her body. He pushed his two fingers in, making her moan even louder. He picked his pace with his tongue and fingers action, making her lose her mind.

She was feeling herself getting close, and she knew he felt it to, because he suddenly stopped. She whined because of the sudden feeling of emptiness. He got up and in a matter of second pushed himself into him.

The sudden change from his tongue to his dick made her scream his name out loud. He let out a loud grown. “So Fucking. Tight.” He muttered out with every thrust.

With his left hand he placed her left leg onto his shoulder, lightly hovering over her, his right hand found her right nipple, harshly nibbling onto it.

She was close, she could feel her orgasm growing. “I can feel you clenching around my dick. You wanna come? Well not yet.”

With those words he picked up his speed, and it made it even hared for not to cum. She tugged her nails into the fabric of her shirt. She looked up at Justin, her eyes begging him to let her cum. He moved his hand from her nipple to her neck, griping it tightly.

“Cum for me, baby girl. Cum for daddy.” Nothing more was needed to be say. She felt her walls clenching, and within the second she came hard, all around him, tugging her nails now into her skin, screaming his name.  

“Fuck. You look so hot when you cum.” He hissed out, not slowing his pace, while she was still high from her previous longly waited orgasm.

He stopped only to flip her around. “On all fours.” He demanded, and once again thrusted into her. She was feeling sore, but she didn’t mind, it felt so good to feel him inside her, she wished they could stay like this forever.

He tangled his left hand in her hair, tugging it back so he could appreciate her pretty face. His right hand slapped her each ass cheek twice, making her whimper after every slap.

He could feel himself getting close, so he picked his pace. Y/N wasn’t far away, even though she just finished one orgasm. She pushed her ass more up “Fucking hell Y/N, do that again.”

She pushed her ass up as much as she could, feeling satisfied that she could please him like that. “Are you close baby girl? Yeah? Cum with me, cum with your daddy.”

His thrust became sloppier as both of their orgasms hit them, she could feel his hot seed feeling her inside, and she screamed his name loudly. He growled loudly emptying himself into her.

As the rid their orgasm of, Y/N collapsed on the bed, and Justin on top of her, never pulling his dick out of her. She moved her head so she was facing him and she smiled. They were both breathing heavily.

“That was extraordinary.” Was all she could mumble into the pillow.

“Oh I’m not finished with you just yet.”

Second Chances

Where you’re his ex-girlfriend and you see his new girlfriend wearing your t-shirt

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Masterlist linked in bio


Harry watches the wall clock as he waits patiently on his couch, counting the minutes until Y/n finally wakes up.

He’s barely slept all night, feeling a mix of anxiousness and misery as he thought of all the outcomes that could happen today. He also found himself looking at Y/n all night, watching her in her calmest state of mind and feeling a sense of tranquility as he sees her in her most beautiful form.

He could never get tired of it—admiring her in her sleep. But as the morning passed and the late afternoon started approaching, Harry didn’t know what the hell was going on.

She was still asleep, crashed on top of him as snores raided her mouth and the only movement being the slight rise and fall of her chest against his. He started to worry, solely for the fact that she slept at a completely reasonable time last night and was known to be an early riser. And since he barely got a blink of sleep, he knows she didn’t wake up for a second during the night.

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Melanie Martinez “Cry Baby” Sentence Meme

Cry Baby

“You take things so hard”
“ Your heart’s too big for your body” 
“ You don’t fucking care.” 
“ It’s not you, it’s them.” 
“ You’re one of a kind and no one understands.”
“ Your heart’s too big for your body.”
“I look at you and I see myself.”
“I don’t fucking care.”

Dollhouse

“We’ll be a perfect family.”
“ Everyone thinks that we’re perfect.”
“ Won’t you be a good sister/brother?”
“ I see things that nobody else sees.”
“ No one ever listens.”
“ Places, places, get in your places.”
“ Throw on your dress and put on your doll faces.”
“Smile for the picture.”

Sippy Cup

“Blood still stains when the sheets are washed.”
“Kids are still depressed when you dress them up.”
“ He/She doesn’t think I’m that fucking dumb does he/she?” 
“ He’s/She’s still dead when you’re done with the bottle.”
“If they give you a new pill then you will buy it.”
“ If they say to kill yourself, then you will try it.”
“ All the makeup in the world, won’t make you less insecure.”
“ Sex don’t sleep when the lights are off.”

Carousel 

“ Will I catch up to love?”
“I feel like I’m glued on tight to this carousel.”
“ Oh, come, take my hand.”
“It’s all fun and games ‘til somebody falls in love.”
“Chasing after you is like a fairytale.”
“We’re always this close,”
“Right when I’m near, it’s like you dissapear.”
“ Where’d you go?”
“ Why did you steal my cotton candy heart?”

Alphabet Boy

“ You’ll never catch me cry.”
“ Fuck your degree.”
“ I’m not a little kid now.”
“ Are you smarter than me now?”
 “But you’re not my daddy and I’m not your dolly.”
 “”You think you’re smarter than me”

Soap

“Think I just remembered something.”
“ I’m tired of being careful.”
“ Let me under your skin.”
“ I said too much.”
“ Why do I always spill?”
“ Guess I better wash my mouth out with soap.”
“ God, I wish I never spoke.”
“ Think I got myself in trouble.”
“ I’m sick of all the games I have to play.”

Training Wheels

“ I carry band-aids on me now for when your soft hands hit the jagged ground.”
“ Promise I won’t push you straight to the dirt.”
“ Love everything you do.”
“ you call me fucking dumb for the stupid shit I do.”
“ It’s not like I’m asking to be your wife/husband.”
“ I wanna make you mine, but that’s hard to say.”
“ Is this coming off in a cheesy way?”

Pity Party

“Tell me what to do to make it all feel better.”
 “ Maybe it’s a cruel joke on me.”
“ Just means there’s way more cake for me.”
“ It’s my party and I’ll cry if I want to.”
“ I wouldn’t have been trapped inside this hell that holds me.”
“ I’ll cry until the candles burn down this place.”
“It feels like I’m dying.”
“ I’ll cry until my pity party’s in flames.”

Tag, You’re It

“I’ll cut you up and make you dinner.”
“ You’ve reached the end, you are the winner”
“ He chased me and he wouldn’t stop.”
“ Can anybody hear me? I’m hidden under ground.”
“Tag, you’re it, tag, tag, you’re it.”
“ I can taste your skin in my teeth.”
“I love it when I hear you breathing.”
“ I hope to God you’re never leaving”
“Can anybody hear me? Am I talking to myself?”
“ Your mother said to pick the very best girl/boy and I am.”

Milk and Cookies

“I’m done with this.”
“ I’m fucking crazy, need my prescription filled.”
“ Do you like my cookies? They’re made just for you.”
“ Ashes, ashes, time to go down.”
“ Do you want me now?”
 “Can’t take it anymore.”
“ Sing you a lullaby where you die at the end.”
“ Never want to see you again.”
“Shit behind the curtain that I’m sick of sugarcoatin’.”

Pacify Her

“Someone told me stay away from things that aren’t yours.”
“ She’s getting on my nerves.”
“ Stop lying with those words.”

Mrs. Potato Head

“Don’t be dramatic, it’s only some plastic.”  
“ No one will love you if you’re unattractive.”
“ Is it true that pain is beauty?”
“ Do you swear you’ll stay forever?”
“ It’s such a waste.”

Mad Hatter

“ This dream, dream is a killer.”
 “ I really hate being safe.”
“ The normals, they make me afraid.”
“ The crazies, they make me feel sane.”
“ I’m nuts, baby, I’m mad.”
“ You think I’m psycho, you think I’m gone”
“ So what if I’m crazy? The best people are.”
“ Where is my prescription?”
“You can be Alice,I’ll be the mad hatter.”
“ That’s probably the reason that we get along.”

Play Date

“ Just me and you and you and me alone.”
“ I don’t want to play no games.”
“ I’m tired of always chasing, chasing after you.”
“ I don’t give a fuck about you anyways.”
“ Whoever said I gave a shit ‘bout you?”
“ I wish I didn’t care all the time.”
“ I never know what you need.”
“ You know I give a fuck about you everyday.”

Teddy Bear

“ Gave you love, put my heart inside you.”
“ I wasn’t scared.”
“ Should I be scared?”
“ How did love become so violent?”
“ Everything was so sweet until you tried to kill me.”
“ I didn’t outgrow you, I just didn’t know you.”
“ I’m fucking scared.”

Cake

“ I feel like I’m just missing something whenever you leave.” 
“ We’ve got all the ingredients except you loving me.”
“ I’m not a piece of cake.”
“ So I’m taking back what’s mine.”
 “ You’re just a piece of meat to me.”

You’d always get lost in big cities
to find yourself in crappy apartments
where you’d get high on stuff you pay for
with shitty arrangements.

Well, if you can get rest
in this area of distress
I’ll never understand
how you could complain about my mattress.

—  // an excerpt from a song I wrote in Paris
j.d.m.
Me & Cinderella

Originally posted by heart-attackles

Summary: The reader always knew Dean Winchester was the one. But when her college quarterback boyfriend gets considered for the pros, they let each other drift apart so he could go after his dream. Seven years later, Dean realizes just what happened all those years ago…

Pairing: Football Player!Dean x reader

Word Count: 8,500ish

Warnings: language, angst, self-depreciation

A/N: Thank you to @imissyoualittlemoreeveryday for giving me the inspiration for this story! Written in split POV between Dean and the reader…


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I have loved you for a thousand decades, and I’ll love you for infinite years to come.
The hope of holding you again gets me through the loveless lifetimes where pain, heartache, and rebirth steal my memories of you.
Always coming back to the faith that love conquers time and space.
You, my love, are the moon and I the starry skies.
We will always find each other across the divide.
—  unknown
10

#SOHNBEARDAY

Happy Birthday to Monsta X’s multi-talented leader Son Hyunwoo – Shownu! My love for you spreads farther than all of the miles keeping us apart.  You give me feelings that I haven’t felt with any other idol before. When my world seems like it is falling apart, looking at your smile makes everything better. You drive  me crazy, but make me happy. No amount of words can express the feelings I have. I love you. Thank you for leading Monsta X to where it is today. Thank you for all your hard work and for everything that you do. Thank you for being your precious self. You have definitely expressed and showed yourself a lot more than you used to. You are getting more confident each day and I want to be like that. Thank you for being such a great role model. Like you tell us Monbebes, always be happy, healthy, and eat your meals. I hope you have a wonderful day and all your dreams come true because you deserve all the happiness. We will always be by your side.

Loey; PCY

Member: Chanyeol - EXO

Genre: Fluff / Smut

Word Count: 5.2k

a/n: some inspiration came to me while I was listening to some music. The songs that gave me inspiration for the two instrumentals described in the following story can be found here: ♤  

enjoy everyone thank you for being patient, lots of love, Ace - ♤ 

summary: there’s nothing like good studio sex with your fellow producer boyfriend



Muses come to you at anytime of day.

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Folks, it’s not talent.  

  • It’s years and years of training in multiple fields.
  • It’s the dance classes that made us sweat.
  • It’s the voice lessons that made us cry.
  • It’s the tech rehearsals that exhausted us.
  • It’s rejection after rejection after rejection.
  • It’s hours and hours on that stage, always striving for the best.
  • It’s endless passion.  
  • It’s taking harsh criticism, struggling to not take it personally, and using it to fuel your progress.
  • It’s not letting somebody’s judgment of you slow your stride.
  • It’s questioning whether you’re good enough constantly.
  • It’s never ever giving up on yourself.  
  • It’s constantly wondering if this is the right career.
  • It’s feeling like we’re not making progress, but still striving every day to be better.
  • It’s facing every obstacle head on, no matter how daunting, and fighting to clear every hurdle.
  • It’s being told by almost everybody you know that your career path is not a viable option.
  • It’s dealing with endless stereotypes that you can never seem to fight off.
  • It’s committing to following your dream, no matter what that path may bring.
  • It’s staying curious, and always seeking to learn more, no matter where we are in our training.

So no, talent doesn’t get us where we are.  Don’t discount your hard work.   Don’t discount how much you’ve devoted to your craft.

Today on "Zen is my bias and I enjoy pain"

You know how it’s suggested that you take Zen as your first route? And then subsequently the rest of the members?

I’m gonna stick by the most common route suggestion which is:

Zen -> Yoosung -> Jaehee -> Jumin -> Seven

Well do you remember his call on Seven’s route, at night on Day 10?

“That’s great… I could’ve made you happy too.”

What if he’s been in love with you throughout all the routes? From what I’ve observed he’s always more loving and SO MUCH MORE WORRIED than the rest of the members, and he always drops hints that he likes you. What if after you reset on this boy his feelings remain and he’s just so confused as to why you have such a grip on him? What if he flirts with you to try to make sense of his feelings?

Another example, that one phone call in Yoosung’s route where he says he should’ve realised his feelings sooner, and then he says “Never mind”.

OKAY LET’S GET INTO THE MAIN SHIT.

We all know that Zen has psychic dreams. Through all of the resets he’s the one who’s been reseted on the most. Think about it. Most people wouldn’t reset after Seven, so he has the good end of the deal. But Zen waits for you… and you never come back. BESIDES THE POINT. Zen starts to realise the trend to every reset and every time you appear his feelings are so strong. There’s a nagging voice in his head that knows he’s gone through the same thing before.

This explains why he’s progressively more protective and caring of you as the routes go on. Think about it.

And then I guess he realises that after Seven, it’s the end of the line. What more does he have to lose? He’s waited over 40 days and it doesn’t seem like you’ll ever come back.

“I could’ve made you happy too.”

Hence, I conclude that Zen loves you in every single route. And he will forever.

———-

FOLLOWING THEORY

Imagine Damon Salvatore kissing you

You sat on the edge of the bathroom counter, describing the endless day you had, that included Caroline dragging you to every possible store looking for the perfect dress for her date with Stefan. Damon was hardly listening, as he leaned forward in the tub and splashed water in your direction. You stopped talking and pouted with fake annoyance.

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Also, friendly reminder that Scott was never this wide-eyed naive innocent fandom likes to paint him as.

He grew up with an angry alcoholic father who abandoned him and his mother years ago.

He grew up with a physical illness that impaired his ability to be the athlete he wanted to be, so much so that even his closest friend expressed doubt rather than support when he talked about how he was going to make the team.

He grew up so acutely aware of financial stresses that he went back into the woods to the very spot where he was just attacked by a vicious monster the night before, because he couldn’t afford to lose an inhaler that cost $80.

He grew up so aware of his place in the social hierarchy of high school and the capacity of his classmates to be assholes that he didn’t even blink, let alone protest when Jackson shoved him into the lockers in the iconic ‘where are you getting your juice’ scene.

The world sucks and people can be awful was never a revelation to Scott McCall. It was never a reality he needed to be protected from, that he could be protected from. It takes strength to be aware of the world, of your life sucking, and managing to still be optimistic anyway, choosing to still smile, and make dumb jokes, and have dreams and ambitions and try to always see the best in people.

Stop stripping Scott McCall of his strength pre-pilot just because you can’t conceive of a character who knows the world can be awful and still finds a way to be happy and optimistic and hopeful.

Death to the myth that jaded = strength, that anything else can only mean someone hasn’t seen enough or struggled enough to know that jaded is the only appropriate path forward.