you two so obviously have the hots for each other

Untitled #1

Words:3184

Warnings: Smut. Lots of it. Plus language.

Pairing:Bucky x Reader

A/N: While I’m finishing a Bucky x Reader in my requests, I figured I’d post this one shot by @madithecatfish

Your name: submit What is this?

They were already tangled in a compromising position. Her legs straddled his hips and his hands were already up her shirt undoing her bra. Her hands had a tight grip on his face, leading his lips to hers. She would grind her hips into his every once in a while, eliciting a groan from her boyfriend. They’d swallow each other’s breathy moans and gasps from small jolts of pleasure.

It wasn’t unlikely that they would end up in this position. Bucky and Y/N’s week had been filled with constant teasing. Watching Bucky work out at the gym for five days straight; Y/N trying on swimsuit after swimsuit to get ready for their summer vacation; Bucky staying the night over her apartment and only wearing sweatpants while she would wear his shirts; making him breakfast in the morning. The sexual build-up was intense, and so was tonight’s.

Tonight’s sexual tension was fervent. It was just supposed to be a movie night at her place. A nice movie, popcorn, cuddling, just the basics. But the movie ended up being much more sensual than they thought it would. The sexy scenes led to light caresses and kisses between the two. Buck trailed his fingers lightly along her thighs and make feather-like strokes along her tummy. Y/N would run her fingertips across his biceps and forearms. She had been ‘readjusting’ her legs in between his. It was only a matter of time before they gave into each other.

“Buck, when was the last time we had sex?” She ghosted her lips over his jaw. She was ready to have him all over her. In back of her while she was on all fours, or all sweaty on top of her as he thrusted in and out of her. The specifics didn’t matter, but her imagination was running wild.

Bucky was having the same ordeal. He could picture Y/N’s low, lascivious eyes staring back at him as she sucked him of. He could just hear her panting his name like a mantra as he pounded into her. His lips making marks all over her body. The difference between the two of them was that Bucky could keep his composure about it all; Y/N was just a horny mess.

He dismissed her question entirely as he proceeded to move them into the bedroom. He held Y/N by her thighs as he lifted the pair from the couch. She wrapped her legs around his waist tightly and began her assault on his neck. She kissed right above his adam’s apple, sucking a hickey onto him. He carried them to the bedroom.

He laid her down on the bed gently, slowly climbing on top of her. They shared a small look before locking their lips together. Bucky always thought that their lips were like puzzle pieces. They just fit so well together. Their tongues tousled with each other once they united. Y/N was more zealous and frenzied with her movements, running her hands through his hair and tugging the locks caught in between her fingers, while Bucky was softer with his. His one hand caressed her waist while the other supported himself above her.

They broke away from each other, but not before Y/N lightly bit at his bottom lip. She broke into an avid smile, “Obviously we have two different agendas here.”

Bucky circled his thumb around her hip, “You want it hot and heavy…”

“And you want it slow,” Y/N ran her hand through her hair. Truthfully, she couldn’t care less how they did it. She just wanted to be done, and done well. “So how about Rock Paper Scissors?”

Bucky rolled his eyes, but stood on his knees anyway and held out his hand. Y/N propped herself up with an arm and held out her hand in a fist.

“Alright, ready?” Bucky asked. She nodded in response.

Together, they both counted down to one. Of course Bucky got the upper hand, no pun intended. He managed to pull paper while his partner in crime threw out rock.

“Fuck me,” she scolded herself. She always won the game until now. And how ironic that she’d lose now of all times.

“Don’t worry about it, Babe. I’m going to anyway,” He said with a smirk.

Y/N brought herself back down to the bed, bringing Bucky with her by her hold on his neck. “Ha ha, so clever.” She brought their lips together in a heady kiss. She licked his bottom lip for entrance. When he granted it, they went the full nine yards. Their kisses were sweet and passionate. They both took to running their fingers through each other’s hair until they drifted elsewhere.

Y/N’s hands braced Bucky’s upper arms. She loved how big his biceps were. Those alone made her think impure thoughts. Well, those and his thighs. And the contrast between the metal and flesh still impressed her to this day. So much about him made her crazy. She never thought she’d end up with a guy like Bucky, but she was glad to have him.

Bucky loved every part of her body. Her chest and hips, legs and beautiful skin. Not to mention her ass. That was something he never got to see in the 40’s. He thought she was just gorgeous and always tried to touch her in some way. He stroked her sides and fondled her breasts under his shirt. His hands moved down to her hips, touching the exposed skin on top of her underwear. They ghosted over the lining, silently asking for permission. Y/N pulled her mouth away from his.

“Really Buck,” Y/N panted, completely out of breath, “you don’t even need to ask.” She lifted her hips and reached her arms down to wiggle them off. She got them to her knees when Bucky pulled them the rest of the way down, throwing them to the side of the bed. She pulled his shirt over her head and threw her bra off of her arms, throwing them in the same direction.

Bucky made a beeline down her body, going straight to where she needed him to be. Y/N was already wet from being on top of him in the living room, so this just did her no justice. She was probably glistening with arousal by now. She was comfortable with Bucky, though. They had done everything under God’s green earth together, so she definitely had nothing to hide from him or be embarrassed of.

He took hold of her calf and threw it over his shoulder. He knew she got more pleasure that way, and gave him a much better angle to work with. She was completely exposed to him, and could see how ready she was. Her lips were spread, giving him a good view of her enlarged and pulsing clit. He moved his head closer to it, ready to make her scream.

He kissed the inside of her thighs before going straight in. Y/N could feel his lips and eyelashes flutter against her skin. It all flushed when she felt him lick straight up her mound. The coldness of his tongue on her made her jump.

“Sweet Jesus, Buck,” Y/N huffed. She could feel him kiss her thigh again with another grin apparent. He takes his time getting back into it afterwards. First, blowing faintly onto her sex. Then quaint kisses everywhere she didn’t need him. He wanted to give her everything, and he would, but some teasing still had to be done. She bucked her hips up in annoyance. This always happened. He was so willing to give, but he still wanted her to beg. What an asshole.

“Please, Baby, can we not draw this out? I’m so ready for you,” she puffed out a not-so-phony plea. She was too proud to beg, or to ever actually admit that she was, anyway.

Bucky finally brought his lips to her clit. He pressed them to her spot softly before swirling his tongue around it. His mouth added to her desire to have him inside her, but this was just as great.

She gripped his wrists while he ate her out. Her legs shook as they wrapped themselves around his head. She made sure not to hug them too tight so she’d hurt him. Instead, she’d relish in the pleasure from his mouth. Something about tonight just made everything more intense and extraordinary.

His tongue licked right on her clit, flicking it back and forth. He’d alternate between licking and sucking the whole of her into his mouth. Jolts of pleasure shot right up to her core with each suckle. Y/N did like when Bucky got rough, but she loved when he took his time on her.

Her hips bucked up, trying to get even closer to him. She could feel a smirk come from his mouth before he continued his work on her sweet spot. Any other time, she’d hold back to keep him from getting any satisfaction, but a breathy moan escaped her lips.

“Oh, James…”

He glared from between her legs ups to her. He hoped to catch her eyes, but only saw her rising chest. He was doing his job, alright, and pretty damn good as far as he could tell. His hands rubbed at her thighs and moved up to her hips and stomach for a tight hold. After a while, he came up from between her legs and used his flesh hand to play with her clit, “Are you close?”

Y/N couldn’t speak. She was too enthralled in the satisfaction she was receiving at this point to actually make any noise. She just nodded and hummed, “Umhm.” His head returned to in between her legs, working to finish her off. He switched between kisses, swirling his tongue, and licking all of her. She wasn’t a huge fan of fingering, so he never even bothered. Y/N’s back arched every step of the way to her orgasm.

It hit her hard, shaking her entire body. It was almost violent. All of her limbs spasmed as she went into an entire state of bliss. Her fingers found their way to the back of his head, gripping the locks she could actually grab onto. Her cries of his name could probably be heard outside, maybe even down a few blocks, but she didn’t care. He continued to lap at her as she came, trying to savor all of her. Her needs were definitely met, and some of Bucky’s.

Once she came back to Earth, she took a minute to recollect herself. She wrung out her hands and counted back from ten. She was interrupted at six.

“Are you okay?” Bucky had moved from below her to beside her on the empty side of the bed, removing the sweaty hair from her head. Y/N turned her head to face him, only to give him a kiss on the lips. Or at least try. It landed on the corner of his mouth, but he still appreciated her sentiment.

“I’m recovering,” she panted. Bucky chuckled at his lover as she could only pull breathy giggles.

“I thought you might’ve blacked out.”

Y/N rolled onto her complete side and propped her head up on her fist, “Don’t give yourself that much adulation, although you were particularly amazing this time around.” Her other arm reached up to play with an unruly strand of his own that stuck out to her.

“You know, you did this. My sex hair.”

“Oh hush, it doesn’t even look that bad.” Just then, Y/N felt another flare spark inside of her, “But I can make it real sex hair if you want.”

She sat up from her previous position on the bed, and faces her boyfriend. She sat on her calves with her hands on her knees, expectantly.

“Take off the pants, Sergeant.”

A smile came across his face as he slipped off his pants. He wasn’t wearing boxers underneath, of course. And that led to Y/N’s ‘ah-ha’ moment.** **

“I knew you were free-balling. I saw your dick-print while we were watching the movie. And your boner as clear as day,” Y/N said while moving on top of him. She placed her legs on either side of him while his back was against the headboard, just like in the living room.

“Which led us here, so you’re welcome, Champ,” Bucky says while lightly slapping her thigh. Y/N slapped him on his metal shoulder in response. They both knew that she just hurt the living daylights out of her hand, but neither of them could really focus on anything other than sex. Bucky was absolutely ready to have her on top of him, and Y/N’s blinding libedo had started right back up again.

His cock was at full attention, and certainly caught Y/N’s. She reached down between them and grasped him lightly. She began to move her hand up and down to warm him up. As some pre-cum started to drip from the slit of his penis, she took her thumb and swirled it around the head. Bucky watched through it all, suppressing the urge to groan. Y/N knew exactly how he ticked. What he liked.

“Are you ready?” Bucky’s eyes looked up to meet Y/N’s, this time successfully. He was right about the lascivious look in her eyes, but there was also the same look he saw in her day to day. He saw the readiness to please him.  He saw that beneath the lusty exterior. She always wanted to in some way or another. He nodded his head at her, moving his hand to stroke her waist. He’d be gripping it later, for sure.

Y/N finished swirling her thumb around the tip and hovered her body on top of his. She led his erection to her core, finally ready to get down to business. Some excitement stirred in the both of them as she began to sink down onto him.

When she pushed all of the way down, he filled her completely. They both groaned at the sensation; Bucky feeling her walls around him and Y/N feeling all of him in her at once. She felt very stretched out and somewhat uncomfortable. She should have paced herself. She thought about that somewhere in the back of her mind, but she was more dedicated to finishing Bucky off than anything. She knew the feeling would pass, and Bucky deserved it.

She grabbed his face by the jaw and tilted his head towards her. She looked into his eyes as she started grinding her hips down onto his. Bucky let out a whimper as she ground her hips particularly rough against his own. Both of his hands reached for her waist, hoping to assist her if she ever needed it. She never really did.

She kept moving at the pace he had set in the beginning. She rocked against him nice and slow. They stared into each other’s eyes the whole time until Y/N placed her hand on the back of his neck and pulled him in for a kiss. Bucky bent his legs up, touching Y/N’s backside. He thrusted his hips up in syncopation with her own. Y/N couldn’t help but whimper against his lips at the feeling of him moving inside of her.

They both felt amazing. Bucky watched Y/N move on top of him in awe. Her skin glistened with a small sheen of sweat as her body twisted in intricate ways above him. She still managed to make eye-contact with him, grinning in the process. Everything about her was screaming sex. Her sexy and wanton façade would break whenever she’d release a moan, looking blissful and delicate.

Whenever Y/N would moan, Bucky would let out a groan of his own. Sometimes they’d be of her name. Her moans always set off a fire inside him, and this time made him thrust up higher and harder into her. She became a lot more vocal and increased their pace. Not by so much, but much faster than when they started. They also got more handsy. Bucky’s grip went from her waist, to her hips, to her thighs, to her back, and somewhere along the line to her neck. Y/N was grasping at Bucky for dear life. Wherever she could reach, she’d grab.

“Buck, I-I’m close.”

Y/N tensed as she felt her climax approaching. The pleasure was becoming way too much for her to take. Bucky was close, too. He nodded in response and pulled her closer, ready for the grand finale. He brought his head to her collarbones, kissing each of them. He hurried his thrusts, ready to finish the both of them off.

Y/N had finally reached her peak, sending her into another climax. This time, it was even more intense. Her the whole of her body trembled vigorously on top of his. She clutched him close to her to keep her grounded. She was sure some tears dropped from her eyes. She couldn’t help but let out a loud, sensuous mantra of his name. And not just Bucky, but James.

Once he heard James, it was all over for him. His breath hitched in the back of his throat. His fingertips dig into her sides as he held her down her hips. They definitely left dark marks afterwards. He emptied himself out into her as he felt her contract around him. He pressed his lips to her neck, and whispered her name and multiple obscenities.

They took their time coming out of their post-sex hazes. Y/N rolled off of Bucky onto the other side of the bed. She felt ethereal, practically floating on air. Bucky was totally fulfilled and tuckered out. His head leant back to hit the headboard. He genuinely didn’t feel the strength to move. She turned to face him again.

“So, how was I?” Y/N gathered her hair up, still feeling on top of the world. Her eyes scanned Bucky’s being. His skin was veiled in sweat and his breathing was heavy. His chest heaved up and down sizably. If he actually had the body to match his age, Y/N would’ve been really worried.

His head shifted to the side to see her. His eyes were now low and weary. He could only grin and give her a slight thumbs up. He let out a huff of air as he turned his head back. Y/N let out a giggle.

“You need help moving, Oldie?”

Unmoving, he muttered a simple “Nope.”

Y/N snuggled herself into Bucky’s side, pulling their throw blanket on top of their naked bodies.

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re about to pass out.” They both shared a look, Bucky’s of faux-annoyance and Y/N’s of amusement. Either way, they both shared happy thoughts as they finished off the night together drifting off to sleep.

X-Men Preference: What You Do During The Holiday + Favourite Part Of The Holidays

Requested by anonymous

Charles: You two just love sitting by a fire on cold nights, drinking tea, and cuddling with each other

Originally posted by magicalseasonsofthewitch

Erik: well being Jewish Erik doesn’t celebrate Christmas obviously. So instead the two of you celebrate hanukkah and it’s pretty special for the both of you

Originally posted by pith

Raven: you loved drinking eggnog together (with you know a bit of alcohol)

Originally posted by strawberry-milktea

Scott: your favourite part of the holidays would have to be when you finally convince Scott to wear an ugly Christmas sweater and raindeer antlers. You’d always take a ton of goofy pictures

Originally posted by musicmanonsax

Jean: Similar to Charles you and Jean like to cuddle up of the sofa with a nice book and a cup of coffee or hot chocolate.

Originally posted by xmas-wonderland

Ororo: The two of you love snow so naturally Ororo makes it snow so you can both admire it together

Originally posted by forever-winter-wonderland

Kurt: You both love taking walks in the snow

Originally posted by oriondiary

Peter: Playing in the snow was your absolute favourite! When it snowed you and Peter turned into a couple of little kids. You had snow ball fights, made snow angels, etc

Originally posted by orchid-bud

Jubilee: you could both admit you loved the presents. You didn’t just enjoy receiving the gifts though, you also enjoyed seeing the look on the others face when they saw the amazing gift you got them

Originally posted by yohantheartist

Warren: Warren acts like he’s not into Christmas but he loves decorating the Christmas tree with you. Every year he insists on putting the angel on top

Originally posted by wintercozy

Alex: playing in the snow is something you and Alex will always enjoy. Alex is that jerk who puts snow down your shirt but you always get him back. You both also love to catch snowflakes on your tongues

Originally posted by anambunelan

Sean: Sean loves the idea of mistletoe. You know those hats with mistletoes attached to them? Yeah Sean has one and he wears it throughout the holidays. It’s nice at first but eventually your lips start to hurt

Originally posted by sawyoulovedyoulostyou

[[ I love commissioning @phaninix I’m just going to say that right now. <3 I love their art so much especially with Nathanaël <3!!!

This I asked for since I am greatly missing @chatiisms and as you can tell, the two boys have markings. Chat with a burn around his neck and Evil with slashed scars on his face. In our verse, these two marked each other upon their first meeting which, obviously, went horribly wrong since they tried to kill each other. Noir slashed Evil’s face after Evil tried hanging him twice, the second time with hot iron.

After the first meeting, they get into fights and arguments and get physical fast and don’t stop until they passed from exhaustion which you are now seeing the result of. Somehow, when they fall [literally fall] asleep, they end up cuddling together. That’s why they are so scratched / scuffed up in the photo, just finished a routine fight and went to sleep.

There are so many confused moments they have together, so many toxic words and hits to each other’s egos and bodies. I love it when they fight since they will exchange flirtatious lines just to throw the other off. With being stuck together as partners for working under Hawkmoth, venting, scrapping, hurting the other, they’ve also come to a mutual conclusion one won’t admit to the other man:

They fell in love with each other but will never say so and continue with the sharply bitten insults and bruise bearing attacks even though they both want the same thing: A loving relationship.

But you can ask my rp partner’s opinion about what I just wrote, I think I have most of it right? ^^; The markings I know but as far as their emotional needs, this is just how I see it.

Under the cut is a version of Evil without his purple skin

Keep reading

Home for the Holiday’s - Scorbus

Request by @recon1000: Hey, could you write about Albus and Scorpius going home for christmas for the holidays with the potters, and Albus like properly introduces scorpius to everyone. And like he comes out to his family. Preferably they react well to it, that would be nice. Something along those lines :)

Warnings: Fluff! (I guess) 

Words: 719

Fandom: Harry Potter


Wind rustled and whistled through the compartment as the snow covered scenery before the two boys speed past them. Albus stared out, his mind overflowing with possibilities and outcomes. His leg shook rapidly against the ground.

Scorpius watched intently. He tried his hardest to depict Albus’ exact emotion but he wasn’t exactly the most open person when it came to those. He was nervous — that much was obvious — but there was more to it than that. Scorpius just couldn’t figure out exactly what that was.

He reached out, placing a hand on Albus’ knee to stop the bouncing leg. He looked to Scorpius and let out a deep sigh.

“It’s okay, Albus,” Scorpius said with a warm smile. “Our parents love us and nothing we tell them is going to make them love us any less.”

They were heading home for Christmas and since both their families decided to spend Christmas together this year, the boys thought it’d be the perfect time to come out to their parents. Lily, James, Rose and Hugo already knew about the two being together but promised not to tell the adults until both Scorpius and Albus decided it was the right time.

“You’re not nervous?” Albus asked with a small tilt of his head.

“Of course I am,” Scorpius said. “Incredibly so. But I also know that they love us unconditionally and will support us.”

Albus stared at his boyfriend for a while, trying to process just how amazing Scorpius is but trying to process all that showed impossible. He readjusted himself and rested his head on Scorpius’ shoulder. Scorpius draped his arm over Albus’ shoulders. “You’re right,” Albus muttered.

“Albus, when are you going to realize,” Scorpius said placing a gentle kiss on Albus’ head. “I am always right.”

The train arrived at platform nine and three quarters. Albus could see his parents along with Draco, Ron and Hermione. His nerves grew even larger by the minute. He took a deep breath before shaking Scorpius awake.

“So are just going to walk up to them and say it?” Scorpius asked as the two of them made their way off the train.

“Maybe… Maybe we should wait for dinner?” Albus suggested looking up at Scorpius. “When everyone’s together?”

Scorpius nodded slinging his bag over his shoulder. He, too, was growing anxious. “Yeah… That’ll be perfect.”

So after everyone got settled at the Potter’s and Ginny set the table and everyone gathered around to eat, Albus looked to Scorpius who looked to him in turn. Albus could hardly hear his families chatter over the loud thumping of his heart when Scorpius grabbed his hand under the table. The action was enough to comfort Albus – at least he wasn’t alone in this.

He cleared his throat. “Mom. Dad,” Albus said loud enough for everyone to look at them. “Mr. Malfoy. Scorpius and I have an announcement.”

Albus looked away from everyone’s gaze – his nerves going wild – and instead looked to Scorpius for strength. Scorpius looked to Albus and smiled before looking back to the adults who stared in anticipation.

“Albus and I – We’re dating,” Scorpius said.

Albus was sure the room fell completely silent – so silent he could have hear a mouse squeak from a mile away. And then his mom smiled. “Well it’s about time!”

“What?” Albus asked, unsure of what his mom possibly meant by that.

“Ha! You lost Malfoy,” Harry said with a proud smile. “Pay up!”

Draco groaned. “You couldn’t have waited until the summer,” he grumbled before reaching into his pocket and handing Harry some money.

“What?” Scorpius repeated. “You all knew?”

“You two obviously love each other a lot,” Harry said with a smile. Albus felt his face grow hot. “It was only a matter of time before you two got together.”

“And… You guys don’t… You don’t mind?” Albus asked, unsure of how to word his troubles.

“Of course not!” Ginny exclaimed with a warm and large smile. “Honey, we love you and we’ll support you no matter what.”

Scorpius looked to Albus with an obvious ‘I told you so’ look.

“We just want you boys to be happy,” Draco said.

Scorpius squeezed Albus’ said letting him know that he was, indeed happy. Albus squeezed back, a large smile written on his lips to show just how happy he was.

It’s sad that this has to be said again, but please do not base Hetalia ships on wars, genocide, or any other form of violence. By doing that you’re acting incredibly disrespectful and insensitive. There’s no room for romanticization of such things, there’s nothing romantic and nothing beautiful about murder. I don’t know why so many people out there don’t understand that, and much less why people don’t understand that that is a reason this fandom has become such an uncomfortable place for many Hetalia fans. 

What is even worse is that I see people, again and again, claim that a country has been raped, á la “country X invaded country Y, so obviously they had some hot sex or X raped Y.” That’s not funny. It’s not respectful at all. What you’re doing is offensive to entire nations - and while not everyone may mind all that much, there certainly are people out there who do, and those people matter just as much as the rest. 

Instead of shipping two countries that have fought each other or are part of a long-lived conflict, why don’t you ship those who have decent relationships? Those who have histrical and perhaps cultural terms? You know, things that would make sense. Quit it with your rape headcanons and the “sexual tension” nonsense. 

misbird  asked:

I just wanted to tell you that your fics are whats keeping me sane, Ive been sick bad for like two weeks (weird broncitis/infection) and I have read your pornathon and ficlets over and over. Bucky's birthday is my fav. I think the characterization is great! Love the prostitution one too, it is such a steve thing todo, I wish there were more on like the team finding out...

I’m so sorry you’ve been sick for so long, that really sucks. I’m glad my fics have helped in any way, and to help propel you towards full health, here is a fic about the team finding out. (it’s super short and probably not that good, sorry, I’m a little rushed for time) Feel better! (I have a soft spot for Bucky’s birthday fic too btw)


Tony is the last to notice there is something off about the way Steve acts around Bucky. To be fair, the Capsicle has always been wound a little too tight for Tony’s liking, and Tony assumes the sudden reappearance of the Cap’s long lost best friend has just propelled Steve over the edge into a long abyss of insanity.

Tony puts the furtive glances and constant touching between the two super soldiers down to their climatic re-acquaintance, making up for lost time or some emotional garbage like that. It’s not like Rhodey didn’t hug him more, keep an eye on him at all times, when he was rescued from that hell hole in the Middle East. Well, when he rescued himself from that hell hole, really.

 It’s understandable, that Cap needs constant reassurance his creepy best friend is really here and not actively trying to kill any of them. Or so Barnes says. Tony doesn’t trust him as far as he can throw him

Because the guy is creepy, the way he watches everyone through narrowed eyes, moves soundlessly around the tower like he’s practicing for when he finally snaps and murders them all. Bruce tells him he’s overreacting, not giving Barnes enough credit, but Tony’s only seen the guy smile at Steve, and that doesn’t inspire a lot of confidence in him.

So maybe Tony doesn’t put two and two together and get four because he actively tries to avoid being in the same room with Barnes without the extra protection of the Iron Man suit. And maybe when he sees Barnes and Cap cuddled together on the couch during team bonding night, he just assumes that back in the forties they didn’t have the same personal space boundaries most people have today.

He doesn’t think anything of it when Barnes grips Steve’s hand tight while Tony does maintenance on the frankly beautiful piece of technology affixed to Barnes’ body. He doesn’t bat an eye when he walks in on the two sharing food from the same plate, drinking out of the same mug, because he knows they grew up in the depression, and maybe they think they still have to share.

Maybe Tony deserves it when Bruce fondly (fondly, okay? Bruce totally loves him) calls him an idiot when he freaks the fuck out when he walks in on Cap and Barnes getting it on in the kitchen. Seriously, Tony has never (well, maybe once when he was a teenager, he’s a healthy male, with a healthy sexual appetite, okay?) wanted to see that much of Steve’s body, and he definitely did not need to know what Steve sounds like when his best friend is sucking hickeys on his neck with a hand down Steve’s pants moving in a very obvious manner.

Tony thinks he’s entitled to the very manly screech he lets out. The flailing was maybe a bit unnecessary, but he was shocked okay? He pinches himself, just to make sure he’s not dreaming it, but he’s pretty sure he couldn’t have dreamed up something so unfairly hot, and really, he’s definitely filing this away in his mind to examine later. Then he just kind of stares, taking in the whole scene until Barnes breaks away from Steve’s neck to glare at him, and oh, he might have just moaned a little bit?

“You-I didn’t- how long have you two?” Tony squeaks out, clearing his throat when he hears how high pitched his voice sounds. “Wait, don’t let me interrupt, obviously you two have just declared your long hidden feelings for each other, and are taking advantage of the moment.”

Tony spins and back tracks out of the room, striding into the living room where the rest of the team is gathered around the tv. “I have an important announcement.” He stands in from the tv, ensuring everyone’s attention is solely focused on him, as it should be. “Cap and Barnes are totally fucking.”

Natasha actually snorts, and smothers her laughter in Barton’s shoulder. Barton stares at Tony like he’s searching for signs of a concussion, or other head wound. Thor smiles wide and claps his hands. “It’s magnificent isn’t it? That they have been reunited with each other, allowed to continue to grow their love.”

Bruce rolls his eyes and fondly, fondly, says, “You’re an idiot.”

Tony huffs, affronted. He crosses his arms over his chest. “Excuse you, I’m a genius. Certifiably.”

“Oh you’re certainly certifiably something.” Natasha deadpans.

“Are you telling me that you all knew those two were fucking?” Tony glares at each of them accusatorily. “And no one thought to tell me?”

“We thought you knew!” Barton exclaims.

“They literally never stop touching each other. Or eye fucking each other. We didn’t know you would have to actually walk in on them to realize those two have been screwing like rabbits since the Great Depression.” Natasha speaks slowly and carefully, like she’s talking to a small child.

“Oh my god. This changes everything.” Tony stares wide eyed at nothing. “Do you think my dad knew?” Tony spins when he hears a snort from off to the side, sees Barnes leaning against the entryway to the kitchen.

“Of course Howard knew. You’re just like him, you know? He wanted to watch too.”

trash-baggins  asked:

... Stupid headcanon right here: the entire Company just spends SO much time fawning over bagginshield. SO MUCH TIME. Like when you have two friends who obviously have the hots for each other but neither makes the first move, you can't help but talk with your other friends about those two hopeless lovesick dorks. I imagine when that is your only entertainment for hours on end while walking and campfires, the shipping would get RIDICULOUSLY STRONG and SUCH a hot talking topic.

“Did you see the way Mr.Baggins was looking at Thorin earlier?” Kili whispered to FIli.

“I told you it’s rude to be watching other people Kee….but did you see how Thorin was acting like he didn’t notice?” 

“Aye, bet he was thinking about another type of sword that needs polishing.” Boruf joined the conversation as he lit a pipe.

“Will all of you mind your own business?” Dwalin sat down on a log, setting his axe next to him.

“Says the dwarf who sent Bilbo out into the woods looking for Thorin when he knew Thorin was bathing.” Nori winked at Dwalin.

AM - Part Eleven (1)

part 11/12 of a Hartbig fic based on tracks from the Arctic Monkey’s AM. 

Track 11: Knee Socks, part one (the second Knee Socks,11.5 due soon)

other fics here

I got a feeling I might have lit the very fuse

That you were trying not to light

And now it’s Playlist Live. 

Grace and Hannah have an unspoken agreement to completely ignore the burning fact that Hannah has very recently fucked Grace on her kitchen counter. Not to mention that only a day later Swike spotted them kissing and almost had a mental breakdown. 

Mamrie recalls getting a contextless text message from Sarah in all blocks that simply read “DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THIS?”

 Mamrie called Swike back because, really, this is not a ‘texting’ level issue, and explained that she knew about it back when it was an ‘accident’ and had been actively repressing since. Sarah was, justifiably, furious with her talent for hooking up with arguably one of the most crucial elements of the entire operation.

Yet, no one could deny what was happening anymore. They were in too deep. Luckily, Hannah and Grace always had the wonderful fallback of ‘trolling’ to blame their very public, very obvious sexual tension upon. Little does anyone know, that tension had been tapped. Very. Though Grace has yet to bring Hannah the pleasure that she received three times in a row just a few days prior.

But Playlist is the opposite of the time or place. Luckily, Hannah and Grace were managing to feign normalcy together. It seems only four girls know about how very real Hartbig happens to be. 

Tonight, that changes. Tyler Oakley has had one too many, because, really, everyone has. That’s kind of what this weekend is for: meeting fans, seeing youtube pals, and most prominently, drinking and dancing. 

Hannah is taken completely off guard when a little lavender-haired minx swoops her aside, though nonchalantly to his credit. 

Tyler clears his throat. “You’re fucking Grace now?” “Jesus Christ, you too? Of course I am not having sex with my best friend. Straight best friend.”

“Well the way you look at each other screams otherwise, girl, and the way you two dance just confirms it. Grace used to be so awkward when you’d touch and now her eyes read pure craving.” Tyler raises his eyebrows, “lust even.” 

Hannah bites her lip because, yeah, she’s noticed, and it’s hot. 

Tyler laughs loudly. “Like, Hannah Hart, you are literally fantasizing about it right now.” Resistance is futile. Plus, Hannah knows about him and Troye, and everyone had hidden Zalfie together, so obviously there is an unspoken bond.

“Fucking fine, but I am not saying anything until there is a fresh glass of wine in my hand.” Tyler grabs Hannah’s empty immediately and two pairs of intense blue eyes stare into each other. “Hannah if you move an inch before I get back the fangirl in me will certainly murder your lesbian ass.” Hannah laughs because Tyler. 

The flamboyant gentleman returns with two whiskeys - not the plan - but Hannah’s into it regardless. After a few sips she whispers confessions into Tyler’s ear and when he asks about sexy times and Hannah, full of liquid courage, admits to the counter thing, Tyler practically spits whiskey into Grace’s face, which has just appeared. 

Grace taps Tyler’s shoulder and asks if she can have this dance and Tyler fangirls on the spot because adorable. Grace rolls her eyes, trying to keep up the facade, but Hannah just gives her a half smile as if to say ‘the little bitch is onto us.’ Grace is immediately fearful but Hannah just takes her hand reassuringly and pulls her to the dance floor to meet Mamrie.

And now the trinity is dancing goofily together. They’re smiling and laughing because no matter what is happening behind closed doors, this feels normal. Mamrie spins both Grace and Hannah into her dramatically in a faux ballroom twist. They all burst out laughing and return to staring at each other happily. Their heads bob, almost nodding because maybe this is all going to be okay after all, maybe it is.

***

Maybe not.

It’s one AM and Grace is pacing quickly around her and Mamrie’s hotel room. The redhead is in still out with Tyler but Grace has run back to solitude because her mind is elsewhere. Her mind is on the little blonde whom she walked back with to their beds. The rooms are very close together and the girls were probably too drunk to venture anywhere alone.

Actually, Grace doesn’t feel that compromised at all. Due to her history of hangovers on vacation, she took it easy tonight. And now she’s fumbling for her phone. She really hasn’t had enough to drink to be going through romantic text messages like this, but as she scrolls through her exchanges with a certain Hannah, it seems she can’t stop herself. 

She grabs her room key and walks a few steps across the hall, biting her lip furiously. 

A little sleepy blonde is thankful for the peephole because she certainly wouldn’t have opened the door had it been anyone but Grace, because she is tired and not wearing much at all.

Grace quickly admires Hannah’s little baby blue button down, black underwear, and white socks before the shorter girl yanks her inside because what if someone sees this shit. 

Before Hannah can stop it, Grace is pushing her against the wall after locking the door instinctively. Hannah pulls out. “Grace, over the course of this thing, we have done a multitude of stupid, stupid things. This, however, is a whole new level of the dumbest idea ever.” The brunette just giggles into Hannah’s mouth because yes. This is literally moronic. Delusional, even. 

“But babe,” Hannah gasps at the pet name as Grace presses a kiss to her temple, “Are you really telling me you don’t want me to take you right here, right now?” Of course Hannah fucking wants that. Hannah has been fucking dreaming about it since the plane ride. It took every ounce of strength in her to not pull Grace Helbig into an airplane bathroom and mess around. But Hannah doesn’t say that.

Instead, she kisses Grace again and suggests, “If you leave now, we’ll be fine. We can chalk this up to a late night chat and a cocktail. No one will be the wiser.”

Grace is now looking at Hannah with pure seduction. “Hannah,” Grace breathes almost too quietly, barely audible, “I really wish I could just walk away, but unfortunately,” Grace’s lusty eyes are burning Hannah, “or should I say very fortunately…”

Grace takes this opportunity to remove her entire dress, standing before the blonde in a matching red underwear set, “I’ve yet to fuck you, and we happen to be in a room, alone, and you are over there being unstoppably gorgeous.” 

Hannah gulps. It’s official, sex drive has completely stolen all rationality and common sense.

-

This was getting long. look out for Knee Socks (11.5) very soon. with love, A