you should really look her up more. she's pretty bad arse

Just a Friend.

Summary: You and Finn Balor are best friends. What happens when you admit your feelings to him?

Pairing: Finn Balor/ OC. 

Warnings: Some swear words, smut implied.  

A/N: An anon requested for a fic based on the song “Just a Friend To You” by Meghan Trainor. You can listen to the song HERE to get a feel for this story and kind of where the storyline came from. 4390 words. Also, this is my first time writing a fic based on a song. PLEASE let me know what you think!

Tagging: @kaitlynwwefan, @panic-angel3314, @shieldgirl95, @earl-01, @nickie-amore, @blondekel77, @reigns420, @littleprincess1621, @m-a-t-91, @luckygillblog, @finnbalorsbabygirl, @unabashedwwesmut, @blackwidow2721, @wrestlingimaginesposts, @wweburnitdown, @thirstiswet, @princesstoniii, @birthday-prinxess, @princess3733, @princesses-reign-daily, @lip-sync@laziestgirlintheworld, @devitts-girl

Originally posted by thearchitectwwe

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Reasons

Remus Lupin x Reader

Prompt: “I said you couldn’t fall in love with me, but I didn’t say I couldn’t fall in love with you.”

Originally posted by nellaey

Y/N runs her hand over the clothes hanging neatly in her closet. Nothing seems right for the occasion - a date (dare she call it that?) with her best friend. “Lils, I need your help,” she shouts, and the girl immediately materializes at her side.

“You’re overthinking this. He’ll like you in anything. Even if it’s nothing. Especially if it’s noth-” Y/N scoffs at that and pushes a laughing Lily away, finally grabbing something to wear.

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I’ll Be Good


image credit

Characters: Finn Balor x OFC

Content Warnings: NSFW, Sexual Content, Daddy Kink, Light Spanking.

Summary: OFC posted a photo of herself on Instagram in a cute swimsuit. Jealous Daddy!Finn comes back to teach her a lesson.

This was supposed to be a short one based off a reader prompt but I got a bit carried away! If you want to throw an idea towards me then feel free to ASK and I’ll see if it interests me. 

Tags: @actualamyautopsy  @oraclegazes @livingthestrongstyle  @phenominalstyles @devittslegos

If you want to be added to the tags let me know!

”I’ve thought of ya all day, little one,“ Finn mumbled into her ear, kissing her fingers. “You got me so hard thinking about you waiting here for me.” Hands running down her waist pulling her in closely for a sweet kiss. “Daddy’s missed you.”

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anonymous asked:

so... any more like that king james post?

Son, it’s time you learnt about… King Edward II of England.

Boring disclaimer: there is no explicit evidence of the true nature of Edward’s relationship with Piers Gaveston or Hugh Despenser. There are no love letters or saucy satirical poetry, a la King James I. There are no sex tapes. All we have is conjecture and circumstantial evidence (and some sources, but not many). It should also be noted that we can’t say with any certainty that Edward II was what we (although not him, as the terms and frameworks are modern) would term ‘homosexual’, ‘bisexual’ or ‘heterosexual’. Relationships between men were often incredibly close, bordering on romantic, with no clear definition between platonic and romantic. It was only really unusual when there was a sexual component involved, and the lack of evidence of this component means that it would be impossible to ascribe a definitive homosexual identity to the two men. However, the lack of evidence does not necessarily mean a lack of veracity, and it’s not impossible that the two were sexually involved. It’s just important to remember that modern labels don’t always fit past figures, because history and all.

Our merry historical jaunt begins with the saucy tale of

Piers Gaveston: in which the dangers of ignoring your barons and giving all your land, treasure and undivided attention to one man becomes apparent

  • So, this begins with King Edward I, who was the king of England from 1272-1307. He was also nicknamed ‘Longshanks’ because of his long legs, which is completely irrelevant, but interesting. In 1300, a saucy 16 year old (or thereabouts) named Piers Gaveston joined the household of Edward I, at the behest of Edward I, who thought he was a pretty decent chap and definitely not about to lead his son astray or anything like that. Fairly soon after that, Edward I became the human embodiment of that ‘I have made a terrible mistake’ gif that everyone used to post back in 2013, because Prince Edward and Gaveston became absolutely inseparable. Prince Edward kept demanding more and more titles for Gaveston and his family, giving him fancy gifts of treasure and land and probably those really expensive watches, and at one point the king became concerned that Gaveston might actually be a bit of a problem when it came to his son producing heirs, and Gaveston was banished from court and exiled, albeit with an allowance. 
  • Edward I died in 1307. His dying wish was that Gaveston should never be allowed back into the country, to which Prince Edward said ‘yes, dad, I will absolutely adhere to your last wish, because I am your respectful son and heir. Oh, you’re dead? I’m Edward II now? Cool! Time to fetch Gaveston and give him loads of land! What a guy.’
  • Edward II was crowned in 1308, and subsequently married Isabella of France, who was two things: an absolute badass, and also a 12 year old girl. That was fine in those days, so everyone just went along with it and assumed that Edward and Isabella would be happy together forever. They were not entirely correct.
  • Within a month of Edward I’s death, Edward II had made Gaveston the Earl of Cornwall, and was a bit naughty about it. By some accounts, Gaveston hadn’t known that this was his plan, and Edward claimed that he had asked his barons for advice, but that was a load of old wank, because the barons hated Gaveston and would probably rather construct a wall made of actual corn and slap a title on that. In 1308, in a pattern which should not have surprised anyone at this point, Edward’s courtiers began to worry about the extent of Gaveston’s influence on the king, with some describing him as being ‘like a second king’. By some accounts, the two were never apart, even sharing a bed on some occasions, and many noblemen began to worry that Gaveston was influencing royal policy, which, now that I think about it, might have been a euphemism. They forced Edward to exile Gaveston again in 1308 upon threat of excommunication, which he did, but Gaveston was allowed to serve in Ireland in a military capacity, as Lieutenant of Ireland (which Gaveston was weirdly great at. Legitimately.) Edward also gave him and his wife a lot of money. Like, a lot. So that’s nice.
  • In 1309, Edward began attempting to compromise with the barons who had ordered Gaveston’s exile. He promised them more land and power, and to stop his really annoying habit of refusing to meet any of them unless Gaveston was also in the room, if they would overturn the exile. They refused, probably accurately assuming that things would be just as bad as before. In response, Edward began to royally suck up to the powers that be, giving land and titles to members of the Pope’s family until he received a papal annulment of the threat of Gaveston’s exile and agreed to sign a statute relieving some of the earls’ problems, and Gaveston returned.
  • Things improved a lot after that, by which I mean that Gaveston began to give all the earls horrible nicknames and Edward II gave him his own personal armed guard, as well as access to the treasury. Fed up beyond belief at this point, the barons drew up a series of reforms known as the Ordinances of 1311, and forced the king to sign them, saying that civil war would ensue if he didn’t. As well as limitations on Edward’s power as king, these reforms included articles about punishment owed to Gaveston for his offences. By some accounts, Edward promised to agree to all articles diminishing his own power if the barons would allow Gaveston to remain as Earl of Cornwall, to which the barons laughed heartily and exiled Gaveston for a third time, with the promise of death if he were to return. 
  • In 1312, the King demanded that Gaveston return ‘by the king’s order’, ostensibly to visit his pregnant wife but probably just to piss the barons off. Some people suggest that Edward got so desperate at this point that he even offered to recognise Robert the Bruce, the man who had spent his entire life at war with England, as the king of Scotland if he would acknowledge Gaveston as having a right to live in England, but that might be nothing more than a story. Whatever happened, the barons were indeed pissed off, and executed Gaveston.
  • Their love affair lives on in Christopher Marlowe’s play of 1592, Edward II, which deals fairly explicitly with their romantic relationship (although not that explicitly, you can take your grandma to see it). 

Luckily, after that, Edward II learned his lesson about taking royal favourites and using them to piss off his barons by giving them lavish gifts and making them Earls of random places, and he absolutely definitely never took another male favourite ever again, which leads right onto 

Hugh Despenser: in which the whole thing happens all over again, only with less exile and more outright bloody civil war, and also waxworks

  • In 1318, a man named Hugh Despenser was made royal chamberlain, and, despite having enjoyed a fairly lukewarm acquaintance before this point, quickly became a favourite of Edward II. By 1320, he was running around demanding titles and money all over the damn place, and Edward was acquiescing all over the same damn place. At this point, most barons were probably wishing that they’d never executed Gaveston, because compared to Despenser, he was a saint. If Gaveston had been a pain in the arse, then Despenser was a pain in every single arse this side of the equator. He was, by all accounts, pretty obnoxious. Unlike Gaveston, who had mostly been interested in shiny things and status, Despenser was interested in power and politics, and used his status to manoeuvre his way up the ranks of English politics like a little worm on a very small ladder. Oh, and Despenser’s wife was also Edward II’s niece. Just so you know.
  • By 1321, everyone hated Despenser except for Edward. Edward’s wife, Isabella, was one of his most vehement detractors. The reason for her hatred of him, seeing as she’d always tolerated Gaveston, isn’t really known - lots of theories have been purported, primarily focusing on Despenser’s reputation of assaulting noblewomen, and possibly Isabella herself. I did tell you that he was awful. Subsequently, some barons rebelled, starting what are now known as the Despenser Wars. There was even an event where some barons contracted a local magician, John of Nottingham, to kill Edward and Despenser by making wax figures of them and destroying them. Bizarrely, it didn’t work. The barons lost the war in 1322, and Edward and Hugh reigned supreme, and by ‘supreme’, I mean ‘with an iron fist’, and by ‘with an iron fist’, I mean ‘like Joffrey Lannister’. 
  • Over the next 4 years, Edward began to severely punish the barons who had been involved in the Despenser Wars. He would execute the barons, then confiscate their widows’ land and give it to someone whose name, you’ll be unsurprised to hear, was Hugh Despenser. Many of these widows were Isabella’s friends, and, despite having been broadly supportive of Edward up to this point, she began to plot against him. She refused to take an oath of loyalty to the Despensers, and Edward retaliated by taking her land, her assets, and even her children, placing them in the custody of… look, do I even need to tell you which family he gave his own children to? It was the Despensers. What a surprise.
  • Remember how I said that Isabella was a badass? This is why. In 1326, she went to France to negotiate with the French king on Edward’s behalf. Whilst there, she made the acquaintance of Roger Mortimer, a marcher lord who didn’t much care for her husband, having been imprisoned by him in the Tower of London for his part in the Despenser Wars. Romance ensued, and so did plotting. Lots of both.
  • With an army of about 1,500 soldiers, Isabella then invaded England, by some accounts whilst dressed as a goddamn widow, and took back her children and her land. This led to two weeks chasing Edward and Hugh Despenser around South Wales, which honestly needs to be a short video with just Edward and Despenser hiding in various castles and Isabella catching up with them and saying ‘look, I can see you both, you’re hiding under the bed,’ and Edward and Despenser shrieking ‘no, you can’t see us! We’re not here!’ until finally Isabella took back her husband. Only by ‘took back’ her husband, I mostly mean ‘imprisoned’. She had Despenser executed in a rather grisly fashion, including but not limited to castration (a joke at his being a ‘sodomite’, as they named him) and having his body chopped up. Grisly.
  • Edward’s fate is unknown, even to this day. A popular urban myth is that he was executed by having a red hot poker shoved up his royal bottom, supposedly so as not to leave any trace of the murder, but this is nowadays widely accepted as being medieval propaganda designed to poke fun at his possible sexual relationships with Gaveston and Despenser.

All of which is really a very long-winded way of saying that Edward II was a terrible king and should definitely have spent more time ruling the country and less time underestimating his wife, but he was also a very interesting figure in terms of being pretty openly Not Heterosexual, and how he’s been vilified, even to this day, for his sexuality. Lots of people still know him as the guy who prioritised his lovers over his country, and that makes sense because he was about as good a king as a wet ham sandwich by all accounts, but they often think of his sexual preferences as being intrinsic to that, as though he would have been inherently better as a king and human being if his lovers had been female instead. Granted, they would have had less recourse to gain political power than his male lovers did because women couldn’t hold the same levels of status or land, but that’s the fault of the political system, not Edward’s sexuality. It would be good if the whole ‘bad gay’ narrative could be superseded by a ‘bad king’ one, but y’know. Let’s not live in hope.

Sources (collated from Warner, Kathryn, Edward II: The Unconventional King): 

  • Vita Edwardi Secundi 
  • Chronicles of Meaux Abbey
  • Close Rolls (of the reign of Edward II)
The Good, The Bad, and The Dirty; Chap. 1

summary: 
“if you wanna start a fight, you better throw the first punch, make it a good one.
and if you wanna make it through the night, you better say my name like
the good, the bad, and the dirty.”

or alternatively, a high school au in which dan and phil used to be best friends and are now enemies that hate each other’s guts until it becomes something a little more complicated than they thought.

genre: angst, smut, some fluff

warnings: graphic fighting scenes, a few mentions of blood, friends with benefits, eventual smut and acts will be specified per chapter, enemies to friends with benefits to lovers, e x c r u t i a t i n g l y  slow burn

word count in this chapter: 2444

read on ao3!!!

a/n: not going to lie, i’m very excited for this fic and feedback on whether you guys like it too is much appreciated it <3 this is something that has been an idea for a very long time and i thought it was time to write it and see what you guys think! i’m going to try and upload this every thursday. like i said, feedback is appreciated!!! hope you enjoy :))))) <3333

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A Wild Night in Vegas -- Part 18.3

Alrightie darlings! The final installment of chapter 18! Thanks for sticking with us! I’m pretty sure @outlandishchridhe and I had this part written before Fergus had even been born. It’s been sitting in our ‘written ideas’ doc for AGES and now we can FINALLY share it with you!! Buckle up because it’s a steamy one!

Catch up on 18.1 HERE and 18.2 HERE

Previously…

She let out a deep breath of relief and leaned against him. He put his arm around her shoulders and hugged her close, glad they’d talked this out.


“It’s so quiet,” she whispered, afraid to break the spell.

“It is,” he replied equally as soft. “I could give Murtagh a ring and get him back if ye miss the noise s’much,” he continued, laughing softly, knowing without looking that the look on his wife’s face would be one of disdain.

Her head lifted and she pulled his face so she could look through her lashes at him. She had the most beautiful eyes, like the depths of the ocean, mysterious and fathomless.

“Perhaps another time. I think I owe him a proper apology, but I’m enjoying our time alone.”

“Aye,” he said, hooking one finger under her chin, stopping her from laying her head back on his shoulder. “So am I.”

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Suppressed Ambitions ( Draco M. x Reader)

 Description: Draco and Reader are partnered up in potions class, Draco and Reader have obvious crushes on each other, but neither of them notice the other feels the same way until an encounter at a party later that week.

Warnings: None- well cursing

Requested

Word Count: 1,261


Potions, one of Draco’s favorite classes, the reason why was because he simply enjoyed the subject, unlike many of his peers who hated Snape.

Today was different though, she was in his class today. (Y/N) (Y/L/N) of ( Y/H), not that he had a problem with her- well in a certain way he did.

The problem he had was loving her laugh and smile, being able to watch her simply read a book for hours on end, listening to her voice when she answered questions- her.

No, he wasn’t in love, but he was falling pretty damn hard.

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And If You Have Nightmares

Hello my lovelies!! I just wrote this last night (in pajamas at 4 am eating gummy snakes and listening to Disney music) and I wanted to share it with you!!

Tags: Fluff, angst, Dancing, nightmares, kisses, Watford oneshot

Word Count: 2k +

Summary: This was inspired by the line “And if you have night mares we’ll dance on the bed” from my favorite song Guillotine by Jon Bellion.  AKA Simon wakes up from a nightmare and Baz has an interesting way of helping him. 

Enjoy :D


Baz

I was returning from the Catacombs that night. I had gotten too careless and too hungry. Deciding to ignore the craving of his blood and instead stare at him while he slept was idiotic, I know. But it was the only time his eyes were closed long enough for me to watch him.

I loved to stare at Simon like a disturbed creature and convince myself that I was thinking of ways to end his life, when in reality I was counting all the moles that caught in the moonlight. I wanted to make sure he still had three on his right cheek, two below his left ear, and one over his left eye. Maybe Simon got older, fell in love with a perfect girl, and decided that he really was going to kill his vampire roommate. But his moles never changed. Three on his right cheek, two below his left ear, one over his left eye. WIth a dusting of freckles on his shoulders. It’s like someone threw cinnamon at him and it just never washed off.

It’s a great way to spend my nights, except when pushing away the sharp pains of want gets to be too much. I was so close to killing Simon earlier, so close to sinking my fangs into his neck, that I ran away. I couldn’t kill my worst enemy because I couldn’t kill the love of my life. Funny how it works like that.

I fed on at least a dozen rats, and I could feel the blood sloshing around inside my stomach as I climb the winding staircase. My cheeks are warm and my hands feel human. It’s nice. My hair is tangled with cobwebs and my trousers are dirty. I just want to shower, then waste the rest of my night dreaming about the one thing I could never have while that one thing obliviously slumbers on a few feet away from me. But when did I ever get my way.

I don’t even make it to the bathroom. Simon’s having a nightmare again. He thrashes violently on his bed, his long limbs getting wrapped up in the blankets. His curls are matted to his forehead with sweat and his face is bright red. His eyes aren’t open; he doesn’t notice the crackling magick that’s pouring out of him in waves. The room smells like a raging bonfire and I can’t think straight because of his dizzying magick. (Then again, when can I ever think straight?) It’s like Simon is being struck by lightening over and over until he can’t handle it anymore. And how can he? He’s just a boy. Everyone forgets that, at some point or another. He’s just a boy.

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anonymous asked:

Jily prompt: everyone's born with their soulmate's name tattooed on their wrist like a birthmark (found this au somewhere on tumblr cant remember where)

Found a link to the prompt here.

“So your soulmate’s name is Junks?” asks Mary, squinting at Lily’s wrist.

Lily frowns, tugging her sleeve over her wrist. She doesn’t normally have it on display, but since Mary revealed the name she had on her own body, she figures it’s a fair exchange. “I’m fairly certain that’s not actually what it says. They just seem to have horrible handwriting.”

“Or horrible parents,” Mary offers. “‘What a rubbish baby. Let’s name it after what it looks like.’”

Lily laughs, but kicks her. “Stuff it, MacDonald.”

Mary turns her gaze up to the ceiling of their flat. They sit side-by-side on Lily’s bed, leaning against the pillows. “S’pose it doesn’t matter if they’re unfortunate-looking. You’re predestined to love them.”

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Two Sugars, Extra Cream

Hello, lovelies! 

I do not expect chapter 2 of Bid Ye Soft Farewell to be up until next week (My SO is in town and I haven’t seen him in a while). SO, I’ve created this silly little ficlet in the meantime. Kind of crazy, kind of out of character. But I had a hell of a good time writing it! Hope you enjoy!


Caramel-Nut Latte, extra hot. Okay, 2 pumps caramel, 3 pumps hazelnut. 2 shots of espresso. Steam milk for extra 20 seconds and a caramel drizzle on top…

Beautiful, Beauchamp. You’re a goddamn coffee wizard.

“Caramel-Nut Latte for Duncan!”

I had been working for Mrs. Fitz for nearly a year at this point while putting myself through school. Though I loved the work that I did at university, there was always something so comforting and homey about the café. Perhaps it was the mismatched green walls, the exposed brick. Perhaps it was the baubles thrown haphazardly on the shelves, or the odd paintings Mrs. Fitz liked to pick up at second-hand shops. (The one with the chimpanzee queen was my favorite). Perhaps it was just the constant smell of coffee that reminded me of my Uncle Lamb– God rest his soul. It was an odd little place, but it was mine. I belonged here.

As if conjured by my own thoughts, I heard the tell-tale backfire of Mrs. Fitz’s ridiculously old car.  She really needed to upgrade.

“Ooooh, Claire, lass! Come help me with the milk! I heard we were runnin’ low, so I bought three crates full!!” Mrs. Fitz was terribly excited about that milk. I, however, did not share in that joy. I knew “helping” in this case meant “carry them all in for me.”

“Aye, aye, Captain Fitz,” I saluted her before going into the trenches. Or the trunk of her car. They looked similar at any rate.

She was making herself a latte when I walked back in with the third crate of milk.

“Mrs. Fitz! I’m utterly shocked that you would waste company products for your own use!” I placed my hand over my heart dramatically.

“Ach. I bought the stuff. I’ll do wi’ it what I please.” And with that she took a sip, smiling the whole time. Should I tell her she had foam on her lip? “Help yourself? I need to speak wi’ ye for a moment.” I waved her off.

“I’m all right. What’s going on?”

“My nephew is moving back into town, and he was needin’ a job. I told him he could work here. Could ye train him a bit? Show him how everything works?”

“Mrs. Fitz…” I was feeling extra dramatic today.

“Claire, dinna…”

“I am appalled that you would use your position as owner and operator of this establishment to hire those you are close to. Where is the democracy?”

“Tis no a democracy. Tis a dictatorship.” Mrs. Fitz was the great-auntie I never knew I wanted. I couldn’t help but laugh at her wit.

“Of, course I’ll help. When is he coming?”

“This Saturday, he’ll be back.”

“I’ll be here. Oh, and Mrs. Fitz?”

“Hmm?”

“You’ve got some foam on your lip.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Saturday mornings were slow mornings. No one had to be at work. Well, besides me, I suppose.

I was leaning against the counter when the overhead door bell jingled. Perk up, Beauchamp. Don’t look like a slacker.

“First customer of the day! Congrats! What can I get for you?” I looked up at the man. I mean, really up. Could a man really be that tall, or were two kids pulling a Little Rascals on me? He leaned down, elbows on the counter. Now, I could really see him. Red curls. Blue eyes. Freckled nose. Was he made out of marble? I had never seen features so sharp.

“Are ye Claire?” His voice was like the honey I put in my Darjeeling.

“Yes, I am. Who wants to know?”

“I do. I’m Jamie. Mrs. Fitz is my great-auntie. She said ye’d be helping me? Learn, I mean.”

“OH! Of course! I’m sorry. Come in, come in,” I said as I lifted the flip-counter. He ducked under my arm to get through. “Sorry, that was a bit awkward. You could have lifted it yourself.”

“Aye, it’s all right. I appreciate the chivalry, madam.” He drew out the word ‘madam’ as long as he could. I bowed in return. He chuckled. We were off to a good start, here.

“So, Jamie what to you know about coffee?” His cat-eyes went totally round at the question.

“Well, ye drink it.”

“Mmhmm. And have you ever made coffee before?” I was skeptical that he had even heard the word coffee before today.

“Aye! I make it every day in my Bunn coffeemaker.”

“Bunns are for shmucks. This is the big league. Can you handle it?” He faked a look of concern before turning his attention back on me.

“Aye, I think so.” He nodded as if trying to convince himself.

“Can you take the heat?!” I was starting to sound like a coach, and he, my star player.

“AYE!”

“All right! Let’s start with espresso, shall we?”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“So, you’ve grinded the espresso beans. Now what?”

“I put it in the machine…”

“No, no! You’re missing a step!”

“I tamp it!”

“Yes!” Jamie was a quick learner, his brain absorbing the things I said and did. Like a big ole ginger sponge. “You’re really getting the hang of it, especially for someone who didn’t even know what a tamper was when he woke up this morning.”

“It looks a bit like a weapon.” He rolled the bell shaped instrument in his hands.

“Perhaps to people with violent tendencies,” I said, giving him a pointed look. He just rolled his eyes. “How about you try to make yourself a latte or cappuccino?”

“Nay. I dinna drink lattes,” he answered distractedly, still playing with the tamper.

“Have you ever tried one?”

“No. I’m a simple man. Dark roast. Two sugars. Extra cream. These other drinks, they’re much too fancy for me.”

“Oh, Jamie,” I whined. “Be adventurous. Live a little!”

“Aye! All right! If it’ll get ye to stop squealing like a wee hog!”

“Did you just call me a hog?” I should be offended shouldn’t I?

“No, I said ye were like a hog. Big difference.” Yeah, definitely offended.

“Oh, well. Of course. Huge difference.”

“Oh, come, Sassenach. I was only teasing ye.” Oh, no, Mr. Fraser. You would not get off that easily.

“I know,” I mustered to most dejected voice. “No, big deal, right?” Could I fake cry right now? That would be the icing on this revenge cake.

“Claire, lass. Truly. I dinna mean it. Ye’re no like a hog. Ye ken that right?” God, that sincerity was killing me. I’d have to put him out of his misery…

“Oh, I know,” I perked up with a huge smile on my face. I’m pretty sure I was showing top and bottom teeth. Realization cam over his face.

“You wee-“

“Gotcha!”

“Ye’ll pay for that. Make no mistake.”

“Bring it on, Fraser,” I crooked my fingers at him, and then quickly let them fall. “Later. We have a task to accomplish.”

“Which would be…?”

“You. Drinking some frilly, fancy coffee you wouldn’t have otherwise.”

“Fine.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

               I decided to make Jamie my favorite specialty latte. 1 pump chocolate. 2 pumps almond. 2 pumps coconut. 3 shots of espresso. Extra hot. Whipped cream and chocolate drizzle. I handed it to him hesitantly.

“What did ye put in this potion?”

“Just drink it, Ron Weasley.”

He took a small sip, smacking his lips a bit and licking cream off his mouth. That motion was a bit distracting.

“So…?” He contemplated for a second, eyes studying the ceiling.

“Weel, tis a bit sweeter than I like…”

“But…”

“But, it’s no bad. Well done, Sassenach.” I blushed prettily and batted my lashes.

“They do say I make the best coffee in town.” This wasn’t a lie. Some people did say that.

“Do they now? Well, I’m glad I was adventurous and tried one of your frilly lattes.”

“Good.” We sat in silence for a few moments, as customers milled around. He was sipping coffee. I was day dreaming about that argument I had with a customer last month… What an arse.

“Claire.” Jamie broke me from my reverie.  

“Jamie,” I answered just as formally.

“Since I’m being daring, I’d like to ask ye a question.”

“Um, sure.” Weird, but okay. He took a deep breath.

“Would ye like to go to dinner wi’ me sometime?” That was definitely not the question I was expecting. I was thinking more along the lines of ‘Not to be rude, but why does your hair look like that?’ or ‘Can you help me bury a body?’

“I’m sorry?”

“Dinner. Wi’ me. Tonight, possibly?”

“I wasn’t expecting that, but yes. Jamie, I would love to have dinner with you.” I pleasant surprise, that was.

“Aye? Really?”

“Yes, really.”

“Thank God. That could have been embarrassing. Is 7 okay?”

“7 sound perfect.” Jamie Fraser, prepare to get the pants charmed off of you.

Hopefully literally.

The Lesser of Two Evils - Part 3

Original request: I was messaged with a great idea from @avengersrulez1536 where the reader is Regina’s sister. Although she is nicer than her she is just as evil as Peter Pan….someone who she is about to come face to face with. Oh and she is a pirate! :D 

This is Part 3 for you all! I’m not 100% sure on whether to end it here or if you would like me to do another chapter (that gets a little more smutty) sooooo let me know!

Peter Pan x EvilPirate!Reader

Words: 2033

Warnings: Violence, dark behaviour and sexual advances.

Disclaimer: None of the GIFs are mine. All credit goes to their creators <3

So….he was going to continue playing this little game of his was he despite you showing some of the power you held inside of you? That’s fine, you will go along with it for now, but he was going to end up regretting it. You were determined to make that so. A snarl edged up onto your lips as you felt the suffocating presence of the shadows once more but before you turned your attentions to them you wanted to say one last thing to the demon of a boy still on the floor before you.

“I suggest you stay out of my way while I deal with these little pests of yours otherwise the next time my magic finds its way towards you it won’t be your arse hurting…it will be that pretty little face of yours.”

The image of wiping that smug little smirk right off his face was more than enough to have you feeling a little smug – although that didn’t last very long when he decided to pipe up once again….he really did seem to like the sound of his own voice.

“So, you think I’m pretty huh?”

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2

November

I walked out of my Thursday lecture with a spring in my step, still incredibly happy that thanks to my schedule I always had a four day weekend, only actually expected in uni on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays. I did have to try not to think about how much I was paying simply to do those 3 days a week, because that would ruin the whole thing.

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#Balm

At first, he thinks she’s pregnant.

It’s not impossible- Not with the amount of time they spend shagging. They may use condoms and the pill but no birth control method is 100% effective (a fact his parents had illustrated beautifully by landing themselves with him.)

It’s not like the notion is an unpleasant one, either: he has occasionally found himself wondering what a little girl with Molly’s eyes and his curls might look like- Just as he has- occasionally- pictured a boy with Molly’s sweet smile and his laugh.

So no, given that he’s now committed to Molly, the notion of offspring doesn’t seem as off-putting as it once did.

In fact, he finds the thought rather… lovely.

Be that as it may, however, he soon deduces that it can’t be pregnancy which causes Molly to scurry into the bathroom as soon as she comes home from work, her head down and her cheeks reddened.

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Shirts and Science Teachers

Based on an imagine from @imaginexhobbit submitted by @hiccuplovver: Imagine the Dwarves giving you a spare shirt to sleep in and them being different sizes.

Word Count: 1632

Well, you got past the screaming in terror – it took a while, but you were proud that you hadn’t passed out like the poor unfortunate Dwarf you’d landed on. Yes, Dwarf. You had rather given up on making sense of where you were, but these small people were definitely not humans. You’d landed on one who looked a bit like the very unfortunate pictures you’d once seen of your dad – complete with bowl-cut hair and decked out in knitwear.

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Paparazzi [Part II]

Pairing: SherlockxReader

Warnings: Kidnapping, little fluff at the end, mormor angst, gunshot (to the shoulder), badass reader, little Sherlock…

A/N Okay, so, I had a plan with th mormor thing, but I took it too far… my mormor shipping has become quite the little probem, I’ll admit. It’s also like 1.6 K words, so…. I’m sorry. I’m also sorry it’s so late. -CE


Last time on Paparazzi…
I’m going to have so much fun with you, pet.” He whispered heavily into your ear while the other jabbed you in the neck. The last thing you could remember was everything turning black, and a lunatic giggling jumbled up with the words, “So… much… fun.”

The drugs wore off rather slowly, creating fog in your vision until it cleared enough for you to see the dull, throbbing grey of the room. There was movement in the dark, just enough to alert you that you weren’t alone. 

“Well, would you look who decided to join us? You’re little fan!” A voice sang- the same voice that had taunted her earlier, belonging to an utter lunatic. Your breath caught slightly when you heard a deep chuckle. His buddy was there, and he had to be just as insane, if not more, to do what he did to those women. You knew that… you just hoped you weren’t the next victim.

“Well, well, well. The little reporter who managed to do what Scotland Yard couldn’t- I’m honored!” The tall blonde chimed sarcastically, messing with a gun on a smooth silvery table. Moriarty’s fingers drummed along your jaw, but you refused to react. You had to do everything Sherlock told you: stay calm, and find a way out. Among other things, but who could remember those?

“It wasn’t difficult, you practically left a trail.” You remarked blandly. As his blue eyes fell to navy, you wished you had the skill of just biting your tongue. 

“What did you say?” Moriarty seemed rather intrigued by your sass, but continued to to type away at his phone, leaning haphazardly on a metal table. The other- Sebastian -just seemed pissed.

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For @twatcitytrick who deserves something that makes her happy.


Aaron sees a lot of different people in his shop. 

People looking for the latest release from the latest X-factor winner. People looking for obscure death metal from Finland. People looking to branch out, listen to something alternative and spacey. Even people looking for the odd classical album, or the old-school vinyl collectors. 

But Aaron hasn’t seen anyone like this in the shop before.

Clearly rich, well dressed with that arrogant air and way of walking. Also, quite clearly confused. Like a deer stuck in headlights. Lost in a sea of good music. Aaron can just about guess what he’s looking for. 

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REGGSY FIC RECS!

I saw a post in the tag asking for a recommendation list so I figured I’d make one! 

Losing in the Best Way by xspace_queenx…Summary:Boy loves girl. Boy is also a fucking chicken.

They Have Their Days by foxwins… Summary: It’s not that the good times aren’t good- they are, they’re better than good, it’s just that their bad times are really bad. Mostly because bad times involve one or both of them being shot.Or, alternatively: How Eggsy and Roxy Learn How to Hold On

Who’s Gonna Catch You Now by foxwins… Summary:Nothing changes. The banter, they bicker, they work together seamlessly on missions and gripe about it afterwards.(Nothing except for the fact that even though she knew what he looked like naked before, now she knows what he feels like naked and between her legs. Which is unimportant and arbitrary and not worth expending valuable mind space daydreaming about.)

As a Gentleman Should by xspace_queenx… Summary: Her voice didn’t waver. Which was fine, because Eggsy knew seducing Roxy would never be that easy.  

The One Where Eggsy Holds Her Hands by demisms… Summary:“You’ll get down if they start shooting, yeah?” he yells over the scream of the tires and the blaring honk of the truck he just cut off.They’re driving — not backwards, not yet — and ducking through pretty fast moving traffic with four dark cars hot on their tails. It’s like something out of a movie, and the chase scene would be invigoratingly if Roxy would just sit down and buckle her fucking seatbelt.“You’ll get down? Rox! Lancelot!” 

A Dream Not Half as Good as Waking Up by owlvsdove… Summary:Eggsy shows up at Roxy’s place out of the blue.

Behind Closed Doors by xspace_queenx… Summary: The Kingsmen have just found out that Roxy and Eggsy are in a relationship. What do they do with this information? Lay down bets, of course! or The time where fully grown men found themselves creeping outside of closed doors in the name of truth, justice, and expensive alcohol.

Five Cities, Two Idiots by Valhella… Summary:Who else would possibly come close to understanding, Roxy told herself. She didn’t like feeling sheltered or protected, because it came hand in hand with helplessness. Every ex-boyfriend she’s ever had would agree. And Eggsy understood, and that’s how they balance each other out.He’s there to catch her when she (rarely) falls, and that’s a feeling she wouldn’t trade for the world.(or)The globetrotting adventures of Eggsy and Roxy after a Serbian crime lord; and the cuddling, kidnappings, and repercussions in between. 

Honey by thecompanystore… Summary:Eggsy finds his spy niche. It’s not quite what Harry Hart had in mind.

The One Where Roxy Brings Him Snow Globes by demisms… Summary:“Why’d you stay here? Why’d Merl — Arthur not have you on their arses the second you were discharged from the A&E?”“He wanted to,” she tells him gravely, trying to push the cup of orange juice the nurse had left into his hand.“And you…?”Roxy shrugs, and when he sticks her with that I’m not buying your bullshit gaze, she rolls her eyes. “And I was busy calling the doctors all sorts of names. They wouldn’t let me in to visit.”They leave it at that. 

Sick by boxesofflowers… Summary:  Eggsy gets himself sick and refuses to acknowledge that he’s actually sick. Plotless fluff because who doesn’t love some good plotless fluff?


Alright here you have it, a quick and dirty list of some of my personal favorite (sfw) reggsy fics. There are more that I really love but this list just includes fics from AO3 for now. I will absolutely continue to update it.

anonymous asked:

How would the Oda Forces + the Uesugi-Takeda Forces be as fathers??

Right, I’m going to do my best with this one… but I have to warn you, like I mentioned in my rules and the guidance post when I first started doing asks, me and children, as well as me and marriage, do not mix well at all.

This is probably the only real area of life writing that I struggle to get my head around and think about without feeling uncomfortable, so I’m going to do what I can, but it’s unfortunately not going to be as detailed as my normal answers. Sorry, honey! I hope it’s good enough for you anyway!

I’m also going to ignore the amount of children the real life warlords had bc I mean Masamune Date had like 14 as well as 2 illegitimate kids and also may or may not have had 7 concubines and a prostitute and I don’t want to think about that rn thanks so SCREW YOU WIKIPEDIA :DDD

IMMA MAKE THIS A HAPPY ASK~

Also I’m ignoring the fact that all of the warlords would have needed to have a boy to take over as head of the family/clan, and so if you want to be historically accurate, just add in a boy where I haven’t mentioned one ;)


Oda Forces (Azuchi Castle)

Hideyoshi

  • I can see him having twin girls.
  • And I also see them as being absolutely spoilt while also the most sheltered kids ever.
  • Because, like, Hideyoshi would be more of a mother than you would be.
  • I’m not kidding.
  • Any time he’s not working or occupied with something, he’s with the kids, usually playing with them or teaching them to do things because he wants them to be able to do anything they want and he also low-key arranges all of their meals so they’ll grow up strong.
  • AND HE’S SO PROTECTIVE LIKE DEAR LORD HELP THESE KIDS WHEN THEY END UP STARTING TO HAVE RELATIONSHIPS BECAUSE HE WILL
    G L A R E  T H E I R  C R U S H E S
    I N T O  T H E  L O W E S T 
    L A Y E R  O F  H E LL.
  • Additionally, these girls may or may not grow up in the full, genuine belief that Nobunaga is god.
  • He doesn’t ever tell them he’s not tho and he ends up passing out one day when Hideyoshi goes off to do some renaissance and the girls come to him and prAY TO HIM TO MAKE SURE HE COMES BACK SAFE AND YOU ARE SO PISSED AT HIM.
  • … but he’s unconscious so you just draw a face on him and take off with the girls.
  • He makes sure that they can both protect themselves though, and while he does try to shield them from the reality of the world, he tells them the important things so they can keep themselves safe.
  • He also uses the other warlords as examples of “good” and “bad” people to be like.
  • Be like Nobunaga and Mitsunari.
  • … don’t be like the rest of them…? Fuck need more role models.
  • Also: Hideyoshi braiding their hair.
  • ALSO: THE KIDS BRAIDING HIDEYOSHI’S HAIR.

Ieyasu

  • One boy and one girl for him~
  • He acts like he doesn’t care about them but he’s honestly the most guarded, untrusting and protective parent ever.
  • He’s worse than Hideyoshi.
  • The kids never leave his or your side because if they do he will raise all hell.
  • Well, sometimes at least.
  • Ieyasu’s quite chill but you’re quite bouncy, and it works out that the girl ends up being more like Ieyasu and the boy like you.
  • Basically, you chase him around the manor 24/7 while Ieyasu just chills with the girl, both wondering what the hell is wrong with you two.
  • But when the girl’s younger, she basically lives on Ieyasu’s hip, and he doesn’t have any shame in carrying her all the time even though he grumbles that she needs to start walking more.
  • She can.
  • She’s just lazy like him
  • He also lets her play with his hair because the floofiness fascinates her.
  • He blushes when this happens because he secretly finds it cute.
  • He teaches both kids how to fight and by the time they’re 10 they’re basically ninjas.
  • But then Ieyasu learns the true meaning of regret as a result of this when they become teenagers and just wReAk HaVoC oN tHe MaNoR bEcAuSe ThEy KnOw ThEy CaN oUtRuN/cLiMb HiM bEcAuSe He’S oLd NoW :DDDDDD
  • LITTLE SHITS
  • But he’s low-key proud of them tho and ends up smirking or laughing every time once you’ve run after them/resigned yourself and gone to have a nap instead.
  • He will legitimately interrogate and have any potential boyfriends or girlfriends go through bloody psychometric and physical fitness tests before he even lets them go on a date with his kids.
  • Also they both end up obsessed with spicy food.
  • Ieyasu prays they’re never in a situation where there’s just bland food because he knows they’d both just starve themselves instead.
  • sHIT
  • #BADPARENTINGALERT

Masamune

  • Haha…
  • Masamune as a parent?
  • HAHA.
  • I’M SNORTING THIS IS HILARIOUS.
  • HE’D BE MORE CHILDISH THAN THE DAMN KIDS.
  • Two boys. Two baby boys for Masamune.
  • Masamune is the type of person who, in the modern world, does a smack cam on their kid and films it to get views on YouTube.
  • As such, I fully believe that he would spend his life playing tricks on his kids.
  • You tell him to “occupy” them while you have a nap because you’re tired as shit and have been working as well as looking after them, and he’s done like two things throughout the whole day so he owes you a shit-ton.
  • Expect him to do something productive with two male toddlers?
  • Prepare for the crushing, defeating blow of disappointment, dear reader.
  • What does he do?
  • HE TAKES YOUR PRECIOUS RED PAINT, PAINTS IT OVER HIS RIGHT EYELID NO LESS THAN EIGHT TIMES TO GET IT TO LOOK LIKE BLOOD THAT’S CONGEALED AND DRIED, THEN SMEARS MORE ON HIS FACE AND THROAT.
  • SURPRISE, KIDDYWINKS!
  • “My eye… my eye… it just… just fell out… kids, help me… my eye… it should be on the floor somewhere…”
  • That is the day Masamune goes deaf from the horrified screams of his children, and then subsequently dies when you’re woken from your precious sleep by said dream and beat him to death with nothing more than a conveniently nearby slipper.
  • In all seriousness, he’s pretty protective, but less seriously so than Ieyasu.
  • He also makes sure both of them are taught how to fight young, so they’ll be skilled by the time they’re old enough to potentially help out and fight if they’re really needed to.
  • He will end any boyfriend or girlfriend that do his kids wrong. Be afraid if they’re in the slightest unhappy and Masamune finds out.
  • And be very, very, very afraid when both boys turn into teenagers, and still-basically-infantile Masamune teaches them the trade of being the biggest tease/pain in the arse/troublemaker in the world.
  • Until they try alcohol and he regrets every decision he’s ever made.

Mitsuhide

  • I actually just see him having one child, and a girl, much to my own surprise.
  • He’s very chill with her, and very subtly protective.
  • He adores her though, like he loves her so much and it’s actually the sweetest thing ever because he tries to hide it at least a bit but it’s so obvious.
  • Even if he’s got important things to do the next day and needs sleep, he insists on taking care of her if she wakes up in the night so you can get a proper sleep.
  • When she’s older, he spends every free moment he has with her, usually playing Go, Shogi or Gomoku, or taking her out into Azuchi to expose her to the world as early as possible.
  • As a result, she ends up being so curious and inquisitive, but also really well spoken and it’s so impressive.
  • He’s so fucking smug that he can have a fully-fledged conversation with his four year old <3
  • He always takes her to his favourite tea room and she’s obsessed with the dumplings by the time she’s three.
  • She’s so smart though, like wow she’s brilliant.
  • If anyone ever tried to use her, she’d have them sussed so fast, and even if they managed to make her believe them, Mitsuhide would be on it and would have it worked out pronto instead.
  • He’d also probably kill and/or torture them but that’s beside the point.
  • He’d just be an amazing dad because he’d give her absolute indpendence and freedom, but she’d know that as soon as she needed him, he’d be there in an instant and ready to do anything she needed.
  • It just melts you because he’s so adorable and thoughtful and misunderstood and it makes your heart go yay <3
  • Also he teaches her how to fight and she is just beautifully terrifying by the time she’s in her teens.
  • #FuckYeahMiniMitsuhide ;)

Mitsunari

  • A boy and a girl for Mitsu #2!
  • … and they’re both, ultimately, going to be absolute geniuses.
  • Like, they’re on the same level as Mitsuhide’s daighter and would legit be rivals in their later life.
  • But Mitsunari is that really kind, soft-spoken sort of dad who’d just adore both his kids and be so devoted to them.
  • At the same time though he’s dead serious about them and his dark side would come out to play if anyone even consdered screwing around with them.
  • Constant games of Go, chess and other strategy stuff. If there’s a spare moment, out come the boards. Mitsunari and his daughter play Go, he and his son play Shogi and the daughter and son play Gomoku at the same time.
  • It’s so, so intense, and you just watch them all, occasionally forcing them to eat, while they have this weird tripartite battle of strategy.
  • He lets them win sometimes if they’re feeling down and they really hate him for it but he does it anyway.
  • He makes sure to raise the two to be kind and considerate, making them thoughtful of others and aware of the people around them.
  • He’s such a good role model though.
  • Actually maybe not.
  • Because they end up picking up his habit of focusing so hard they forget to take care of themselves and it’s genuinely the one and only grudge you hold against him.
  • Like Mitsunari they’ve been studying for seven hours and have not moved an inch between them fix your damn mistake.
  • He gets scared when this happens and sort of coaxes or drags them outside and has a little sparring match with them both.
  • They love reading so much as well though.
  • Oh, did I mention he’s that beautiful dad that reads to his kids at any time of day with them sat on his knee?
  • YEP.
  • IF THEY ASK HIM TO READ TO THEM LATER ON, HE WILL GO TO THE LOWEST LAYER OF HELL AND BOUNCE BACK SO HE CAN DO IT FOR THEM.
  • God bless Mitsunari. *Amen*

Nobunaga

  • Pffft…
  • You thought it was bad enough having one Nobunaga around?
  • He has one son, and he may as well be the carbon copy of Nobunaga.
  • It’s honestly mortifying.
  • Even from when he’s a baby, Nobunaga will make the odd comment to him, sitting him on his hip and declaring, “If something stands in the way of you and your goal, you must obliterate it and achieve what you set out to complete.”
  • And you’re just like “Nobunaga, no. Stop. Don’t turn my son into a lunatic.”
  • Nobun’s offended at that.
  • He sort of gasps quietly and makes a face.
  • Like he’s actually hurt that you’d call him that.
  • But then you tell him he’s not that sensitive and take your son elsewhere, and Nobunaga just laughs to himself because you’re not wrong.
  • THIS BOY WILL BE ABSOLUTELY FORMIDABLE IN FIGHTING.
  • D O  N O T  A T T E M P T  T O  F I G H T  H I M.
  • A T  A N Y  P O I N T.
  • E V E R.
  • He will literally just kick your arse to Mongolia because Nobunaga teaches him how to fight himself right from childhood and it’s like it just is in Oda blood to be dangerous as all hell.
  • You don’t even try to stop them from training because you know they’ll just sulk and then do it in the middle of the night.
  • Life is stressful for you.
  • But Nobunaga also drills everything he’s learned from you into his son, like how to treat women properly or not talk about people like they’re matchsticks the fact that he’s allowed to have happiness even if he’s done bad things.
  • Your son also proclaims himself the “Devil Prince of the 6th Heaven” and Nobunaga is so fucking proud of him for it.
  • The latter also declares that you’re the “Devil Queen of the 6th Heaven”.
  • He gets slapped.
  • Really hard.
  • But when you’re not listening they’re low-key buzzing because the family is just on-point and so powerful and they love it.
  • #BowDownToTheDevilSquad
  • #DevilSquad1k600s
  • (Since he’d be like eighteen in the 1600s.)

Uesugi-Takeda Forces (Kasugayama Castle)

Kenshin

  • Two boys and a girl and I will not budge from this no matter what you say to me.
  • His upbringing is strict, but at the same time it’s not.
  • Like, by this point he’s changed because of you, so his outlook is pretty different.
  • But he’s still himself in essence, and that does show in his parenting.
  • He’s so damn protective of them.
  • I mean, he regularly reminds them, not even just telling them once, but reminds them every now and again that if anyone causes them grief, they’re to tell him, so he can deal with them appropriately (which usually means frighten to the point of half-death or just outright kill).
  • But with them himself, he’s actually quite sweet and soft.
  • On rare days when he can spend times with them, in the mornings, he’ll often let them ll climb on top of him and rest for a while on his chest, whether you’re still asleep next to him or have gotten up already.
  • It just makes him feel calm, having them all so close and being able to feel them there with him.
  • He makes sure all of them can fight, and especially focuses on making sure the girl can protect herself, since at this time women were very much targeted for numerous reasons.
  • His kids are very obedient, since he’s not tolerant of disobedience at all, but by the time they’re teenagers there’s really no need to scold them because they’re quite mature from their upbringing.
  • He makes a point of telling them to support and protect each other, and as a result of your influence on him, makes sure to emphasise the importance of knowing that they should be able to seek out emotional and mental support from each other as well as him and you.
  • You’re so fecking proud of him and how he’s learned to move on from the way he was at his worst, to now become someone like this.
  • But because of this, the kids are so, so close, and have each other’s backs all the time.
  • The girl is the youngest, and the two boys are always with her even in adolescence, having sworn to protect their little sister forever.
  • Kenshin almost cries when he overhears this and has to punch a tree to make himself stop.
  • BONUS: Kenshin learns that “Nada” is “Nothing” in Portuguese and then teaches the kids that Nobunaga’s real name that he never tells anyone is “Nobunada” and they genuinely think it’s his name.
  • There’s a truce eventually, and when Nobunaga finally meets the kids, Kenshin just smirks so much and looks so smug, and Nobunaga’s so suspicious but then suddenly, there’s just this trio of,
  • “Hello, Nobunada.”
  • S A Y  G O O D B Y E  T O  T H E  F U C K I N G  T R U C E  T H E N

Sasuke

(I didn’t know whether I was supposed to write him as a father in the Sengoku era or modern era, and I got confused…? So I’m just writing it in the modern world since I don’t think he’d stay and have a family in the Sengoku.)

  • One boy for the ninja~ and his name would be Yukimura because Sasuke was named after the was-there-but-wasn’t-there-properly ninja Sasuke and he’d name it after Yuki and no one can tell me otherwise…
  • Considering that Sasuke is from the modern world, his upbringing of his kid is considerably more… objectively healthy.
  • He’s back in the modern world when you two have his son, but raising him after living in the Sengoku feels llike a blessing.
  • Books. History. Knowledge. THE SENGOKU. EVERY WARLORD THERE EVER WAS.
  • THIS KID WILL BE EATING THIS FOR BREAKFAST I’M NOT EVEN JOKING.
  • But he grows up with it and sees how much Sasuke loves it and ends up loving it himself anyway.
  • Which almost makes Sasuke cry he’s so happy <3 #ProudParent
  • He would always nickname his son as “Yuki” and ends up basically nullifying his full name by the time he’s five.
  • Whoops.
  • Sorry not sorry~
  • (You’re not amused.)
  • He makes sure to always explain how important history is and how we learn from it when something historical comes up, so Yuki (n’aw) ends up so well informed it’s actually kind of frightening.
  • He’s talking about politics when he’s eleven and it genuinely frightens you a little.
  • Yuki ends up finding out that Sasuke has ninja skills, though, and that signals the end of the latter’s life.
  • “Dad, teach me to be a ninja!”
  • “Dad, show me how you can climb the side of the house again!”
  • “Dad, show my friends how you can do backflips!”
  • He regrets his life choices. A lot.

Shingen

  • One boy and one girl for Shingen as well!
  • This one is just the best dad ever, hands down.
  • He’s that dad, with the dad jokes, the one who’s constantly pampering and spoiling his kids and chatting with other mothers and fathers about their kids being the most beautiful/smart/athletic/sassy/witty etc.
  • He’s so proud. Oh my God, nearly everything that comes out of this man’s mouth after you give birth to the first is just children.
  • He spends every waking moment possible with them around work, and is careful not to expose them too much to the harsh reality of the world until he thinks they’re ready for it.
  • When they ask him to teach them to fight, though, he nearly passes out with hearts in his eyes because he thinks it’s so cute.
  • AND THEN HE’S TEACHING THEM TO FIGHT AND THEY BOTH GIVE HIM THESE TINY LITTLE GODDAMN PUNCHES ON HIS SHOULDERS WHEN HE KNEELS DOWN AND HE FUCKING MAY AS WELL HAVE BEEN SHOT.
  • HE JUST COLLAPSES AND FOLDS BACK AND YOU WALK OUTSIDE JUST AS IT HAPPENS.
  • YOU ARE  S H O O K E T H  THINKING HE’S BEEN ATTACKED.
  • But then they’re both climbing all over him and screaming in delight saying they’re so strong, and he’s feigning death while “choking” out that they’re both so strong and such amazing warriors.
  • You dismiss the fact that they’re learning how to kill people at six and just melt because 6′1″ Shingen being toppled by two toddlers is just tear-jerking.
  • He always lets them sleep with the two of you and they sleep on his chest without fail, but he always keeps an arm around you as well.
  • Having you all together at night makes it so much easier to sleep because he feels so much safer.
  • When they’re older, he’s so supportive of them and helps them with absolutely anything if they need it.
  • You tell him off if he treats either of them differently because of them being the opposite sex, and because of this they both end up so capable but friendly and charismatic but kind and it’s stunning.
  • But he insists on calling you “Queen” as well as “Angel”, the girl “Princess” and the boy “Prince”, ever since he hears the words from Portuguese visitors.

Yukimura

  • One boy for Yukimura~ and ofc he’d be called Sasuke what else would he be named…?
  • As much as he’s an awkward sweet potato with people, he’s shockingly good with his own kid.
  • And he adores him. He doesn’t ever say it outright, but he loves him to bits and just feels so happy every time he looks at him.
  • From the get-go, he’s making sure he’s learning how to fight and become stronger, so he can protect himself and the people he loves like Yukimura wants to be able to.
  • He just sits there cross-legged, holding his hands up, while the tiny boy punches at his hands.
  • And Yukimura is just so adorable while it happens.
  • He ends up smiling because “Sasuke” is smiling and then Sasuke giggles and Yukimura ends up snorting which makes Sasuke scream with laughter so Yukimura ends up hunched over nearly sobbing and low-key suffocating from howling so hard.
  • You end up in tears yourself, it’s so cute.
  • Also you’re crying laughing but more because Sasuke is now punching Yukimura’s head.
  • Sasuke ends up growing up a lot smoother than his dad thanks to you.
  • You’re that used to awkward pick-up lines and Yukimura being a stuttering mess that you’re able to use him as a role model.
  • A role model of what-not-to-do-to-flatter-or-impress-someone-and-how-not-to-offend-someone.
  • Yukimura likes to take you all away when he gets the chance, and you’ll stay in this small house in the woods for a little holiday and do things like hunting and exploring together because both of them like to be constantly doing stuff.
  • They basically carry you between them.
  • You don’t have the energy for this.
  • But you all come back at the end of the days shattered, and Yukimura plonks down on the floor in front of the fire when it’s lit, and then you and Sasuke lie with him and you all just fall asleep together.
  • (It’s so cheesy… *shudders*)
No Control | Chapter Twenty-Six

Summary: 

Micky Bennett: college student, loyal friend, aspiring nurse, One Direction fan, Harry Styles enthusiast. Her best friend, Trevor, wins tickets to a show in New Jersey with meet and greet passes. Micky expects a quick photo op with the boys and a great night at the concert with her best friend. What she gets a whole lot more than she bargained for.

To read previous chapters, you can go here.

*Please feel free to reblog and send feedback. It’s much appreciated :)*

*Gif is not mine.*

A/N: honestly, I’m not the biggest fan of this chapter, until the very end, so be nice, please lol. Next chapter will pick up, however.

TWENTY-SIX

When we land in Manchester, and I can’t help the anxiousness I feel wash over me. I told my parents I was coming, since Harry and I were going to be staying in the house for the night before driving down to Holmes Chapel the next day. It’s already late evening when we arrive, and Harry and I are in a weird state of exhaustion from traveling but also alertness from having gotten a bit of sleep on the plane on the way over. We’re mostly silent on the short drive from the airport to my parents’ home. Harry had someone drop his Range Rover off at the airport before we landed so we’d be able to drive ourselves around this weekend as opposed to calling cabs or renting a vehicle.

My mum is stood in the doorway of my childhood home when we get there, the light from inside the house illuminating her from behind. I can see she’s in a pretty thick jumper to keep out the chill that’s settled over the night. The display in Harry’s car read that it’s only about five degrees now from the lack of sunlight, and I can feel it as I step out of his toasty cab. 

Mum is by my side in an instant in her house slippers, wrapping her arms around me and enveloping me in her sunshine scent. I hug her back tightly, only letting her go when I see Harry come from the back, having gotten our bags. 

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have a cleaned up but still ridiculous ‘brought together by a minor car accident’ au because jily. and llamas.

“Hello? Ma’am? Are you okay?”

Lily opened her eyes to find a boy staring at her through her car window with mild concern on his face. Two boys, actually. She blinked, trying to refocus her gaze. Didn’t work, but he was so pretty she almost didn’t mind seeing two of him.

“Are you okay?” he asked again.

Lily took stock—her knee hurt like hell, but the airbag had deployed and prevented serious injury. Her greatest danger seemed to be repeated sneezing from the bloody white powder still hanging in the air.

She rolled down her window. “I think so, yeah.”

“Thank fuck—I mean god. I mean shit.” He rested a hand on the roof of her car and leaned forward. “Sorry.”

“It’s alright,” Lily said, leaning her head back on her seat. “Did I hit the llama?”

The grin slipped of his face—faces. “You don’t remember what happened?”

“Er…I hit a llama?”

“No, you didn’t.”

“I didn’t?”

“Are you sure you’re alright?”

“There was a llama…right?” She swore there was a llama, and swearing, and swerving.

“A llama, or a mutant sheep,” he said, grinning slightly. Lily’s vision finally focused—there was only one of him now. He was far handsomer than her blurry vision had given him credit for. 

He had a very nice smile, didn’t he?

“You really don’t remember?” he asked. She shook her head. Or started to, but stopped, due to the pain. Good Teeth leaned forward. “Are you sure you’re okay? Were you unconscious just then?”

“No,” Lily said, because that was the appropriate reply when someone asked you if you were just unconscious.

“Right,” he said. She could tell he didn’t believe her. She didn’t believe her.

“Was I unconscious?”

“Maybe. And you didn’t hit the llama, you hit me.”

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