you should know that i still have not watched battlestar galactica

Epic Movie (Re)Watch #108 - The Road to El Dorado

(GIF originally posted by @dreamworksmoments)

Have I seen it before: Yes

Did I like it then: Yes.

Do I remember it: Yes.

Did I see it in theaters: No.

Format: DVD

1) Not only is this one of my favorite animated movies, it is one of my favorite movies period. I found it while scrolling through Cartoon Network or HBO Family or something and watched it every chance I could get. 12 year old me found it very edgy. The mild swearing, the cigars, the blasphemy, all of it was very enticing and that’s fed my love of the film since.

2) Elton John & Tim Rice, the songwriting duo behind The Lion King, re-teamed for this film and churned out a nice set of songs. But the strange thing is if you listen to the soundtrack most of the songs are recorded differently than how they appear in the film. The one exception I think is “Someday Out of the Blue” which plays during the end credits. Still, they songs add the fun and energetic flavor to the film. The opening song in particular, “El Dorado,” does a nice job of setting up the mythology we need to get the movie started in a very short amount of time.

3) If you’re a fan of voice over work, you’ll recognize Jim Cummings as Cortez.

Cummings is one of the most prolific and talented voice over artists out there. It would be impossible to list everything he’s done, but his most notable work has been as Darkwing Duck, Winnie the Pooh & Tigger too, Hondo on "Star Wars: The Clone Wars”, Razoul in Aladdin, and Ray the firefly in The Princess and the Frog. It’s fun knowing what he sounds like because not only do you hear him in Cortez, but you also pick up the random nameless characters he plays too with his different voices.

4) The heart of the film, the thing that makes it great: Miguel & Tulio.

Originally posted by roadtoeldorado

The bromance between Miguel & Tulio is what makes this film work as well as it does, it’s what makes it fun! Kenneth Branagh and Kevin Kline voice the pair respectively, and their chemistry is off the charts. It doesn’t hurt that the pair actually got to record their performances with each other, a rarity in animation (although Pixar has done it with Monsters Inc for John Goodman and Billy Crystal).

Their relationship and roles are clear from the start, they balance each other out. Tulio is mildly selfish with a great hunger for gold and an ability to think things through. Miguel’s heart is bigger than their brain, being the dreamer/softie of the group (wanting the map to El Dorado, saving Altivo the horse when he almost drowns, etc.). And they play off each other beautifully.

Originally posted by hamsturfinnur

5) 12 year old me was very fascinated with the slight profanities this film had.

Tulio [when he’s about to roll his dice]: “Come on baby, papa needs that crappy map.”

I thought crap was a real swear when I was twelve. I didn’t lose my innocence until thirteen.

6) Chekov’s Fake Fight.

Originally posted by somehow-you-will

(GIF originally posted by @somehow-you-will)

The fight comes into play later in the film too, but is a showcase mainly for the wonderful banter between Miguel & Tulio and - therefore - the excellent writing of screenwriters of Ted Elliott and Terry Rossio. These guys were my favorite screenwriters when I was twelve, and can you blame me? Their resume consisted of: Aladdin, The Mask of Zorro, Shrek, The Road to El Dorado, every Pirates of the Caribbean film, Treasure Planet, and both National Treasure films. They have a strong penchant for strong dialogue too. Consider the exchange above, and also this:

Miguel: “You fight like my sister.”

Tulio: “I’ve FOUGHT your sister! That’s a compliment!”

I love that.

7) According to IMDb:

The film shares several attributes of its namesake, the "Road” comedies made famous by Bob Hope and Bing Crosby during the 1940s (which helps explain anachronisms such as shared language, pop culture references and lack of historical accuracy).

I just thought that was a fun share.

8) God, I love the banter between these two.

[Tulio & Miguel jump into barrels of water in a chase scene but can’t escape because the barrels are being loaded onto a ship]

Tulio: “What’s happening here?”

Miguel: “We’re both in barrels. That’s the extent of my knowledge.”

9) Even the bad guys have great dialogue!

Cortes (upon discovering Miguel & Tulio on his ship): “My crew was as carefully chosen as the disciples of Christ.”

10) I’m just going to let you know now, so many of my notes here are just quotes from the film I love.

Miguel [giddily, after Cortes tell the pair they will be enslaved in Cuba for being stow aways]: “Alright! Cuba!”

11) For example, another quote:

Miguel: Yes, that’s it Altivo. Find the pry bar!

Tulio: Yes, “find the pry bar”. He doesn’t understand “pry bar”! He’s a dumb horse, there’s no way he could understand…

[Altivo drops keys into the brig]

Tulio: Well… it’s NOT a pry bar.

12) The Trail We Blaze

Originally posted by insidealosershead

Animated films are usually short so as to be not too time consuming. It can take years to make 80 minutes of animation. This film has a nice device of compacting what could be very long scenes into neat little montages with the use of a song. We still get Tulio & Miguel’s fun journey through the jungles to find El Dorado, but it’s done in three and a half minutes to a fun Elton John tune. It keep the energy, the adventure, but doesn’t waste the time of the animators or the audience.

13) Immediately Tulio and Chel have great chemistry as they play “pass the golden idol” together!

14) El Dorado.

(GIF originally posted by @dreamworksmoments)

Immediately upon entering the city the audience is filled with a sense of wonder, achieved through gorgeous animation and also Hans Zimmer’s subtle music which adds for extra bone tingling. You marvel at it with Tulio and Miguel, and you understand how it is such a mythical place.

15) Edward James Olmos does some great voice over work as Chief Tannabok.

Originally posted by roadtoeldorado

I’ve never seen “Battlestar Galactica” so I am mostly familiar with Olmos from his work in Blade Runner, Stand & Deliver, and even “Agents of SHIELD”. I think he shows off a nice amount of range with this addition to his resume. Chief Tannabok is not an angry man. He is kind, soft, gentle, patient, but also you can tell that he’s kinda sad. You don’t HEAR Olmos, you hear the chief and that makes him an excellent addition to the cast.

16) And of course our big bad, Tzekel-Kan

Originally posted by roadtoeldorado

Tzekel-Kan is the opposite of Chief Tannabok. He is angry, an overlord of sorts. He wants blood because he believes it is what’s needed. He believes people are wicked and evil just for enjoying life and being kind, and it is his righteous duty to smite them. He pisses me off way more now than he did when I was twelve.

17) This whole bit with the volcano! Miguel goes too far and says that the gods should not be questioned or else they will be forced to release their awful wrath…but Tzekel-Kan wants to see that. Only they’re not gods! So he and Tulio turn away to try and figure it out and we get this…

Originally posted by findreactions

There’s an old addage in writing: “A coincidence to get a character out of trouble is lazy.” However in this case I’m 100% okay with that because it’s just funny as hell.

18) How many of us have used this GIF?

Originally posted by idiot-eden

19) Chel.

Originally posted by specta-a

Chel is a nice way of making the duo a trio. Voiced wonderfully by Rosie Perez, she is just as crafty and cunning as Tulio (if not more so) but also understand Miguel’s sense of adventure. The pair balance each other out already, bit if Miguel acts too dreamer-y or Tulio is too gold hungry they throw each other out of whack (as this film shows). Chel helps stabilize them by film’s end and is a lot of fun to watch. Also, bonus points for being an animated female character with a body that is physically possible.


Chel [on why she wants a life of adventure]: “You’ve got your reasons…and I’ve got mine. Let’s not make this personal, okay?”


21) So Chel needs to prove to Tulio and Miguel she’s a good con artist…

[Chel shows the pair the dice she stole from Tulio]

Tulio: “How did you get those?”

Miguel: “Where was she keeping them?”

I’m with Miguel, that’s the more important question.

22) Oh Miguel…

Originally posted by jay-robo

Originally posted by mulder-scully-gifs

23) It’s Tough to be a God.

Originally posted by borzotro

The only time this film is a traditional musical (ie: the characters themselves break into song & dance), and considering Kevin Kline’s and Kenneth Branagh’s singing here that might not be the worst thing. The interesting thing is that their version doesn’t even appear on the soundtrack. Instead we get a duet with Elton John and Randy Newman.

24) I need to remember this excuse.

Tulio [trying to convince Tzekel-Kan not to make a human sacrifice to the gods/them]: “The stars are not in position for this tribute.”

Miguel: “Like he said…”

(GIF source unknown [if this is your GIF please let me know].)

Originally posted by pantyception

25) I don’t identify totally with Miguel or totally with Tulio, but with parts of them. Like I identify with Tulio being kind of the dreamer who thinks things are possible, but this is a very me thing to say:

Tulio [after Miguel tells him he worries too much]: “No, I worry just the right amount! You can never worry too much!”

Same, Tulio. Same.

26) Remember how I said this movie was edgy to 12 year old me. Well it features a scene where Chel tries to seduce Tulio. Like, more than wanting a kiss. But like she shows off her shoulders for a back massage, they’re later found on the ground together all disheveled, it’s not even very subtle when you know what’s going on. Twelve year old me was very innocent.

27) I love their banter.

Miguel [when he and Tulio end up in a big arena to play ball for the locals]: “Well don’t blame me!”

(GIF source unknown [if this is your GIF please let me know].)

28) The ball game is a lot of fun to watch, if for no other reason then Chel on the sidelines.

Chel: “Foul! That was a foul!”

And then it’s her idea to use the armadillo as a ball replacement to cheat.

29) So earlier in the film we got this line from Miguel:

(GIF source unknown [if this is your GIF please let me know].)

And then later in the film Miguel tries to convince Chief Tannabok that the boat they are using to leave isn’t good enough (because Miguel wants to stay) when in fact it’s perfect. When Miguel admits his mistake, we got this line from the chief.

Chief: “Hey, to err is human.”

Miguel goes to get in the boat, but then he looks over his shoulder at the chief and the chief looks at him knowingly. And they don’t say anything else about it.

I love that. I love that the chief isn’t an idiot, but he knows. He knows and he knows it’s good for his people and he knows Miguel is a good guy and…I just love it!

30) I love little things like this.

[A giant stone jaguar, controlled by Tzekel-Kan, attacks the city. It grabs a warrior, ruffs him up A LOT, then lets him fall to the ground.]

Warrior [patting himself down]: “I’m okay!!!”

[Jaguar steps on warrior]

Warrior [from under Jaguar’s foot]: “I’m still okay!”

31) Remember how I talked about Chekov’s Fake Fight?

Tzekel-Kan [when he was Miguel & Tulio cornered]: “I know what you are and I know what you are not. And you are not GODS!”

Tulio [after a beat]: “Y-you’re not a god!?”

The pair then continue to have a very real argument where they say some pretty cold things to each other…

Tulio: “You’re buying your own con!”

Miguel: “At least I’m not DATING mine!”

But it has the same effect. Tzekel-Kan is distracted, enjoying their fighting, and the audience is as surprised as he is when the pair work in sync again and punch the guy out. It’s a nice way of playing the scene out.

32) Friends Never Say Goodbye. A very sad song that plays when it seems like Tulio and Miguel are going to take separate paths in life and are really mad at each other. It actually has some nice truths to it, and again is slightly different on the soundtrack. Elton John is backed up by the Backstreet Boys for the song on the album. I hope that didn’t ruin it for some of you.

Originally posted by dorawinifredread

33) The film ends with the citizens of El Dorado crashing a pillar into their gate so as to keep Cortes from finding the city, only it is falling too soon. So Chief Tannabok grabs some of the ropes and holds it back for a while. And this is probably REALLY mean of me and I apologize in advance but I just thought of this:

Originally posted by ignitetheliight

I’m so sorry.

34) According to IMDb:

A series of sequels featuring Miguel, Tulio, Chel, Altivo and even the armadillo going after other legends about gold was planned, similar to the Shrek (2001) series, but following the disappointing box-office results they were immediately canceled.

Originally posted by roadtoeldorado

While that would’ve been interesting I’m kinda glad this film just stands on its own. It’s a nice little gem that way.

I love this film, and think a lot of people out there will too. People don’t really talk about it these days except to talk about how no one talks about it. It’s a nice variation from standard Disney fare, the music is great, freaking Miguel & Tulio are just awesome, and it is just such an enjoyable/adventure filled film. I think you should all watch it now! It’s on Netflix if you have it. So go. Go follow that trail! (Too easy?)

Star Trek: Discovery - Episode 3 quick review.

I did like the first two episodes of STAR TREK: DISCOVERY.  I finished watching them and was excited to see more.

Episode 3, titled ‘Context is for Kings’, delivered on that excitement.

What becomes apparent is that those first two episodes were a prologue, and this episode is the true pilot for the DISCOVERY series.  We finally see, and come aboard, the title ship.  We meet more of the regular characters.   Whilst the series looks shiny and new, with 2017 technology behind it, it feels a lot closer to the warmth of those Trek series that have come before it.  Very different to the cinematic vibe from the pilot. This is a series. But a damn fine looking one.

Of course, it’s tonally darker to the Trek we’ve known, coming it a bit closer to DS9 during the Dominion War. We were warned that it would be more adult, not quite x-rated, but they’d allow themselves to take the stories where they need to.  I doubt we’ll see any GAME OF THRONES naked romping at any point, but this episode features something of a horror segment, that certainly appears to up the gruesome over any previous Trek. 

I won’t get into actual plot points here, you want them, watch it. But here are my thoughts on certain aspects:

Michael Burnham - 6 months into the prison sentence for her actions in the previous episodes. She’s in a dark place.  Down on herself, but then everyone else is down on her too. Sonequa Martin-Green is good though.  Very solid, and gets to bring in some light to her shade, albeit not that much at this stage.  I continue to look forward her leading presence.

Saru - Not much to do here, but own each scene he appears in.  It’s nice that the character has been promoted since we last saw him - now the first officer on the USS Discovery.  Doug Jones shines in his performance, so it’ll be good to see the character come to the fore as we progress, as I’m sure he will.

Captain Gabriel Lorca - Jason Isaacs is on top form. Lorca is certainly a different, darker commanding officer that we’ve seen before.  Normally the Captain is our lead, so has to follow a morale compass.  Lorca is not our lead, and there’s definitely something villainous about him.   It has to beg the question whether he’ll still be the commanding officer come the second season. 

Lieutenant Paul Stamets - I have a question here.  He’s a science officer, with a particular skill and interest.  But does that make him the Discovery’s 'chief engineer’, of sorts?  As yet I’ve not seen a character/actor announced for such a position, so maybe Stamets takes that role?  Either way, it’s a interesting introduction.  Like most of the crew, he’s pretty down on Burnham.  He’s quite rude, and short.  He does have a bad episode - he loses his friend - and he’s opening 'uncertain’ of Lorca, his commanding officer.  He’s interesting because of it.  What’s very nice, knowing that he’s Trek’s first ever regular homosexual character… it’s not mentioned in this episode.  Not once… because it’s not necessary.  It doesn’t define him. Another show might ram it down the audience’s throat, but these writers don’t feel the need to.  And they shouldn’t have to.   We do know - from press reports - that his partner is on the ship, the Discovery doctor in fact, so it will be nice to see that come out organically.

Cadet Sylvia Tilly - Michael’s inexperienced bunkmate.  A highlight in the episode, possibly because she offers some light comedic relief in a dark Trek.  She babbles, and could be argued as some meld between Wesley Crusher and Neelix.  Maybe an unfair comparison, as I enjoyed Mary Wiseman’s performance.  I wonder if she’s maintain her fun-time factor, or if the events of the series will darken her character?

Commander Landry - anyone thinking this new Trek shares more likeness to Battlestar Galactica won’t have their mind changed when they see actress Rekha Sharma features as the chief of security (Sharma played a Cylon on BSG).  Landry isn’t the happiest of characters, quite serious.  But then she’s the chief of security on the USS Discovery, she probably wouldn’t be.  It should be noted that Landry isn’t a regular character.  I do wonder if that means she’ll be around for long, or if she’ll get offed soonish.  I hope not because she’s clearly got something shifty storyline with Lorca… but we still have one regular character left to meet, Ash Tyler, and he’s a security officer.  It’s unusual to have more than one character in the same field.

As to the mission of the Discovery…. well, the mystery of the series is very much the mystery of the mission.  Lorca has Stamets working on a new mode of transport.  It’s highly dangerous, and has some shocking results when it goes wrong.   Now, presumably it can’t work, or take on, or else every Trek series from TOS onwards would use it.

Certain highlights from the episode, that I’ve not mentioned… there’s a tribble!  There’s a Gorn skeleton!  Black badges.  Black Altert!  The first reveal of the USS Discovery. The sort-of-probable reference to Spock!

I found myself gripped by this episode.  Which isn’t bad for a third episode, mostly because it felt like the first…this was the episode to sell the series.  And I am sold.  Very much so.    Unlike every other series, STAR TREK: DISCOVERY is a serial.  It’s not episode of the week effort, where it gets to hit the reset button.  We’re on a journey… and it’s a journey I’m more than happy to be on.

Bring on episode 4!

I felt like writing today.

Five years of climbing mountains and exploring this new world, and he finally wanted to find a home. Lee Adama didn’t know what home was, but looking for it alone while he slept in a crude lean-to under the stars sure as hell wasn’t getting him anywhere. So he came back to where they’d landed, to where he’d last seen his father. He couldn’t find home on his own; maybe he could find it where he’d left the rest of humanity.

He couldn’t find home, but apparently he was in the minority. There were children, babies, everywhere he looked from his vantage point on the hill, spilling out of rough cabins and shouting into the clear air where before there had only been savanna grass and herds of animals grazing.

Babies. We’re at war, and that woman wants us to worry about having babies. He could still hear his father’s voice ringing in his ears, full of disdain for the schoolteacher who dared to call herself President of the Twelve Colonies.

He could still see her tight, guarded smile as she stood in the CIC watching his father line up ships for water transfer, asking him for help with the military.

He should have known then that eventually Laura Roslin would get her way. Even as he bent over backwards to help her in the early days after the apocalypse, he hadn’t believed that she’d actually do it, actually save them all, but she had. In her own stubborn way, she had given humanity a fresh start.

Five years after he’d watched his father and Laura take off in a raptor, five years after he’d set out on his own, he was back on a green hillside, shielding his eyes from the sun, staring down at the new civilization that had sprung up in his absence. No cities, no technology, but a civilization nonetheless.

He recognized some of them – Ellen, still tall and lithe and easy in her skin, clutching Saul’s arm as he shouted and waved at the kids blocking his path. The oldest, grown taller and thinner since he’d last seen her, but he’d recognize that smile and those curls anywhere. Helo’s smile, Athena’s eyes. Hera was clearly the ringleader, the other children falling in line behind her as she teased the old Colonel. A few feet away, a tall, blonde woman bounced a baby on her hip as Gaius frakking Baltar kneeled to argue with a little boy who looked just as determined as he did.

Romo Lampkin was deep in conversation with a woman Lee knew he should recognize, but he didn’t. She wasn’t a Viper pilot; she wasn’t a refugee from Caprica. She wasn’t important to him, those days between the end of the worlds and the start of this one. Maybe that’s why he left, all those years ago. Humanity deserved a blank slate, but he knew he couldn’t give it to them. Maybe that’s why Kara left, and his father too. Some of them were just too rooted in the old ways to give them up completely.

Other faces were new. The primitive culture he’d witnessed when they’d landed on this rock, not quite as primitive anymore. They were communicating, and as the wind shifted, he picked up on the curious combination of words and clicks and sounds.

He wondered who taught them, without Laura. He remembered the white board with the numbers written in her careful, looping hand. If anyone had deserved a blank slate, it was her. He shifted the threadbare pack on his shoulder and made his way down the hill, determined to find out.


Keep reading

May it Always Stay True (L x Reader)

So I thought I’d post an L x Reader fic this time! This one I had gotten inspiration from the song Gaeta’s Lament from the series Battlestar Galactica. It is sung by Alessandro Juliani who is the English dubbed voice of L. Me being the L fangirl I am pictured him serenading this to me as I fall asleep. Hope you guys do too! I highly recommend you listen to the song while reading.


L looked below at the figure in his arms. She looked up at him with a tired smile and her eyes only half open. He smiled back at her and leaned down to place a soft kiss on her head.

“I told you to call me by my real name.” He whispered into her hair, which lightly tickled his face when she shook her head.

“And I told you that while I appreciate you putting your trust in me,” she replied with a small yawn. “This isn’t even something you’re letting Watari do. So, I’m not taking any chances.”

Knowing how stubborn she was, but also highly appreciating her not wanting to do anything to risk his safety, he let it go with a tiny chuckle and kissed her head once again as he stroked her back comfortingly.

“Well, what is it you want my sweet?” He urged her to continue with what she had to say.

“I want you to sing to me.”

“Sing?” He inquired.

He felt her cheek move against his bare chest when she nodded slightly before letting out another yawn.

“I’ve heard you sing to yourself a few times,” she explained. “You have a very nice voice. Do you think you can sing to me as I fall asleep?”

“I’ve never really sang in front of other people before,” he told her. “It’s always just been something I did as a way to kill time.”

She looked back up at him and, once again, gave him an adorable sleepy smile. This time, however, she opened up her eyes a bit in order to give him a pleading stare that could rival a puppy’s.

“Please baby,” she beckoned, now adding a small pout into the mix. “It’ll only be for a short while. Just until I sleep.”

Again, there was no point in disagreeing with her. Especially when she made herself so irresistible. As a sort of payment, L lifted her face with his index finger and thumb tucked under her chin and placed a short but deep kiss onto her lips.

“Very well then, my sweet,” he said once he released her. “If that’s what you want, then who am I to deny you?”

Her smile grew as she gave his waist an affectionate squeeze and pecked his torso to show her gratitude.

“What is it you want me to sing?” He asked, stroking the strands of her hair.

“Doesn’t matter,” she replied softly. “Just something to soothe me.”

L placed a finger on his bottom lip whilst thinking of the proper song for her request. Shortly after, he came up with a particular one in mind. It was a song that he had known for years and was one of his personal favorites. Especially with its lyrical content, it fit the situation at hand perfectly.

“Alone she sleeps,” He began his serenade in a tender voice that she immediately found pleasing to her ears.

In the shirt of man.

With my three wishes clutched in her hand…”

He returned to his stroking of her hair as he continued with his ballad.

“The first that she be spared the pain

That comes from a dark and laughing rain…”

Her eyes were now completely closed, and her breath became a lot more at ease.

When she finds love,

May it always stay true.

This I beg for the second wish I made too…”

Her arms around his waist had begun to let loose. This gave him the opportunity to be released from her embrace. He was now laying right next to her, giving himself a good view of her slowly drifting off. He cradled her cheek with his hand which made the ends of her lips turn up slightly from his loving touch. Knowing she was on the verge of deep slumber, L carried on with the last of his melody.

But wish no more,

My life you can take.

To have her please, just one day wake.

To have her please, just one day wake.

To have her please, just one day wake.”

She was finally fast asleep. L leaned over, placed one last kiss on her forehead, and shielded her body with the comforter before reluctantly getting off the bed. After he put back on his clothes, he made his way downstairs.

L was back to his usual crouched position with his eyes glued to a computer screen. Even though this scene was not supposed to feel out of the ordinary for him, it felt like something was missing. He knew exactly what that something was. Nevertheless, this was the first time in a long while that either of them had gotten any decent rest. He wasn’t going to take that away from her, no matter how lonely it felt without her presence.

He attempted to console himself by remembering that she was merely upstairs. This only made things worse since this gave him the temptation of wanting to join her and put off his work, despite there still plenty he needed to do for this case. For the first time in his life, he was not thinking straight.

“Ryuzaki.” A familiar elder voice broke him out of his thoughts.

L turned his chair around so that he was greeted with the sight of Watari rolling him another cart full of assorted sweets.

“Thank you very much.” He casually stated, followed by him seemingly going back to looking at what was on the screen.

The old man stood by and gave a small look around of the room.

“Is she not joining you tonight?” He asked when he was finished with his examination.

“She’s upstairs sleeping.” L plainly stated with his eyes remaining on the monitor.

“Well that’s certainly something I was not expecting either of you to do anytime soon,” Watari chuckled. “Shouldn’t you be accompanying her then?”

“There’s still a copious amount of work that needs to be done for this case. For one thing, there is the evidence we have that should be looked over, tapes that have to be watched— “

“Ryuzaki,” Watari broke off the younger man’s rant by placing a hand on his shoulder. “You’ve gone through all this with strenuous attention. You don’t have to go to sleep, but please go to her. Lay with her. Be with her.”

“There’s still work to be done…” L repeated in a mumble since that seemed to be his only viable excuse to stay.

“I can take over from here,” Watari offered with a small warm smile hidden underneath his mustache. “I think I’m more than qualified to do so. After all, aren’t I the one who taught you everything you know?”

L ran a hand through his dark messy hair and freed a heavy sigh. Finally, he looked up at the man in front of him. The one that’s ever come close to being a father figure to him. Surely, he’d have some idea of what all he was feeling exactly meant.

“Watari,” he began. “I love her. I love her very much.”

“I am aware of this son. Although you’ve managed to keep this hidden from everyone else, I was able to spot the clues. Such as how you’d sneak a glance at her occasionally, even when you didn’t intend to do so. How she appears to be the only one who possesses the capability to make a genuine smile appear on your face. And of course, all those times you’d let at least a finger linger on her whenever your hands would accidently touch.”

“Hmm yes, I guess those would be good examples in showing my feelings for her, wouldn’t it?” L agreed as he placed himself in deep thought once more with his thumb over his bottom lip.

“Have you told her how you feel?”

“She knows. I confessed to her earlier tonight before we…”

Watari gave another amused chuckle as he saw a fair shade of pink dust the cheeks of the younger man and watched him timidly look away.

“She reciprocates these feelings then.” The elder man stated.

“Yes.” L whispered. A little smile formed on his face, remembering her saying how she loved him too. Although he had deduced that there had been an 80% chance she shared the same feelings, he couldn’t help but worry how her reaction would be when he had confessed. It was this, along with other actions and thoughts that were completely out of character for him, that had him worried.

“Watari,” he commenced with his question. “Since I’ve never really felt this way about anyone before, it has been leaving me to wonder: Does being in love make you weak?”

Watari grabbed a nearby chair and placed himself in it so that he was on eye level with L. And so he couldn’t have any other choice but to focus on what he had to say, Watari placed a firm hand on each of his shoulders. Trapping him somewhat.

“Absolutely not.” He started. “If anything, it can make you stronger. It can make you think you can do anything you set your mind to.”

“Does it?” L interrupted with the subtle blush returning to his face. “Because it feels as though I can’t think properly and that I’m impulsively letting my guard down.”

“That’s having love enter you,” Watari explained. “You’re having this person see your true vulnerable self, letting her tear down your walls. Because you know she is someone you can place your whole trust in. You feel you can be your honest self around her. You know she is someone who won’t take advantage of what you share. And as you continue to do this, you will know that she is the one for you when you wrap your existence around her. It’s all very frightening, yes, but you have always been one to take risks. And love is definitely something that’s worth the trouble.”

“I’m still having a bit of a dilemma finding sense in what it’s all doing to me- “

“Who said love made any sense my boy? It’s not exactly something you can logic your way into or out of. It is an unpredictable and irrational mess that anyone can get into. Which is why I beg you to be a madman and go love her. Love her against reason and against all discouragement that could be.”

L managed to look away from his intense stare and at the tiled floor. After a short amount of time, he looked back and gave a tiny nod. Wordlessly, he took Watari’s hands off him, got himself up from his seat, and made his way back upstairs. He stopped himself at the top and, without looking back, he muttered,

“Thank you for your help Watari.”

She fluttered her eyes open and took into view the unfamiliar room she was in. She rubbed her eyes and groaned whilst slowly coming out of her sleepy daze. Before she could stretch any further, however, she felt something tighten around her waist. She turned her head and smiled at the handsome pale face that had made itself at home in the crook of her neck.

“You came back.” She whispered lovingly. She turned her head back in order to watch her fingers intertwine with his.

“I couldn’t stay away,” He softly spoke into her ear before placing a warm kiss on her cheek and then leaving a trail of them onto her neck. Resulting in her softly moaning and having him hold her much tighter.

“Did you sleep well?” He carried on.

“Mmhmm.” She mumbled.


She then turned herself fully around so that they faced each other. She gave him a smile and lazily began to play with his dark mane. He beamed right back at her, loving the feel of her touch.

“Ryuzaki,” she said. “Last night was just…it was amazing.”

His smile grew a little at this. He took hold of the hand in his hair and gave it a kiss then pulled her much closer to him. If that was even possible.

“It was pretty incredible, wasn’t it?” He replied.

“And please don’t worry,” she assured. “I promise not to mention anything you told me to anyone.”

“I know you won’t. Otherwise I’d have to kill you.” He teased.

She rolled her eyes and playfully scoffed at him. “I feel like you’re only half-joking about that.”

He simply shrugged and gave her a mischievous smirk. She answered with a shake of her head and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him in for a hug. She placed her head on his shoulder. One of his arms was draped around her waist while his chin sat on top of her head, his fingers idly combing her locks.

“Can I promise you something too, my love?” He breathed out, breaking the relaxing silence.

“Yes?” She responded somewhat unsure.

He lifted her off his shoulder and looked deep into her eyes. She did the same, gazing straight into his big dark grey orbs. He took his hands and cupped her face. One of his thumbs made small circles against her cheek. She took her own hands and placed them over his.

“I vow to stay true to you no matter what,” He told her. “You will always be the only one I 100% trust.” He paused to give an affectionate kiss on her forehead.

“I wish for nothing more than to have you take all that I am,” He resumed. “My life belongs to you and no one else. So long as you desire to have it.”

Her eyes began to water as a smile spread across her face. He used his thumb to wipe away a tear that had managed to escape. She released a small emotional chuckle at his gentleness.

“And my life is yours to have as well.” She talked in a low voice, wanting to avoid the sound of it breaking.

They shared one more passionate kiss before going back to holding on to one another.

Alone she sleeps in the shirt of man

With my three wishes clutched in her hand

The first that she be spared the pain

That comes from a dark and laughing rain

When she finds love may it always stay true

This I beg for the second wish I made too

But wish no more

My life you can take

To have her please just one day wake

To have her please just one day wake

To have her please just one day wake

To have her please just one day wake

Originally posted by lost-in-valhalla

Originally posted by sensualkisses

Major Crimes: a boy’s tale

I admit, I got into watching Major Crimes because of Mary McDonnell’s outstanding performance in the first couple seasons of Battlestar Galactica. Just, yum. I’d watched The Closer fairly regularly, though had tapered off only to be sucked in again with the prospect of M. McD playing Kyra Sedgwick’s nemesis. Of sorts. And also, you should know that I’m a 40 year old lesbian who is always actively interested in watching well-written women, whether lesbian, bi, trans, straight–I’m down for a gal who tells a compelling story about women–focusing on the woman’s journey herself. So that’s my bias and I’m sticking to it.

What a great character Sharon Raydor was in The Closer! Gosh, so full of determination, agency–she came in as a foe, then subtly showed how she was actually a sleeper ally, working quietly behind the scenes to support Brenda Leigh, while vehemently denying this careful navigation of defense, prodding and cooperation. Plausible deniability.

Wasn’t it wonderful to see two adult women, both in command performances working simultaneously for and against one another, occasionally engaging in jaw-dropping snark–yet ultimately supporting one another, and furthering each other’s agenda? That dynamic: complicated adult women who work for each other, without fighting over a man, a job or invented jealousy–still so seldom seen. And that’s a shame. Because as an adult woman, I would so sorely like to see more of my own maturity, willingness to mentor and share success, ability to know what I can forgive, reflected in the fictionalized lives of women on both small and large screens.

So. We come to Major Crimes. And almost from the start Sharon Raydor’s character was…subdued? Even after several years it’s difficult for me to clearly say how her character was filtered down, yet it was. Gone was the fiery & impassioned tone, replaced with something much quieter and whispery. Actors need to learn and evolve their characters as they progress through their development–but from the start I felt like we, the viewers were being hit over the head with–She’s a Good Guy! Sure she battled Brenda, but she’s our new hero so we need you to Like Her. Except, I already did, and I think the viewing audience who was missing that point must also have struggled with how complicated Brenda Leigh’s character was. Because between the two, Brenda was the harder person to like, with dramatically more questionable morals/ethics than Sharon Raydor. Yet, there it was: suddenly Sharon is super soft spoken, super background, super supportive: the Martyred Mother. For such a nuanced show as The Closer, it felt awfully odd to have Sharon so overtly presented as likable, sensitive, soft and nurturing–when the entire trajectory of her predecessor had been built on quirky difficulty. And clearly, there was an audience for that. Now, yes, you don’t want Sharon to be Brenda Leigh 2.0. She didn’t need to be. She was already established as a much different person/personality in The Closer. No need to reinvent again for Major Crimes. 

Major Crimes: I’m not entirely comfortable with the new Sharon, but I do love the ensemble cast, so I’m down for the crew. From the start it was designed to be more generously shared among the actors, less a show focusing on the brilliance of one team member. Yet, also from the start was Rusty. Rusty, a crossover character from The Closer, a vehicle to showcase Sharon’s motherly, nurturing nature. And bit by bit, Major Crimes became a show about men. Men and their journey, their trials, their hopes & desires. I find myself alienated from Major Crimes–not because I don’t like the characters, their give and take within their team: but because so very many shows are telling me stories about men, and so few shows are telling me anything at all about the lives, professional or otherwise, of women, especially women in their 60s who are still living dynamically, actively, who are engaged with their work, their family, their desires: but one where the focus is on the woman, not how those women relate to the world through their men. 

Major Crimes is a good show. But it’s a show about Men. Happily, it features several gay men, as well as their straight friends & co-workers. But it has moved away from Sharon’s tale & quite firmly into exploring the lives of the men.

There’s renewed emphasis on Rusty, and also Rusty and his boyfriend, Gus. And now possibly about Rusty, Gus–and Gus’s new boss who is also gay and potentially making a play for Gus. So perhaps this season we’ll get to see young male angst play out more. Neat. Never see that on TV. And with Rusty comes his therapist Joe, and Joe’s involvement with the Major Crimes team.

There’s Julio and his desire to adopt–and now Julio navigating life with Mark, his foster child. We see much more of Julio these days in relation to Mark, not in relation to his squad. Is it interesting seeing a widowed Latino male on his journey to foster a child? It absolutely is! But it’s defo a male-driven plot line: man fosters boy.

There’s Louie’s relationship with Patrice (okay, this is the main relationship I’m rooting for TBH & I don’t actually ever get tired of Patrice/Louie screen time). There’s Amy’s relationship with Coop. There’s the addition of the New Guy Cop (What the hell is his name? Why is he there? What does he do? Why do we need this guy?). There’s Buzz’s large arc about the murder of his father and uncle, which has lead to Buzz’s story line involving the son of the man put in jail for that past crime. There’s Fritz Howard still looming in the background. And finally, there’s the entire Andy falling in love with Sharon story line. So. Many. Men’s. Stories. 

Look. Are these stories unusual, compelling even? Sure, several of them are and could continue to be. Interracial marriage & older couples falling in love, single adult men providing father-figures for kids, young gay men navigating first love, abused children learning how to trust and open themselves to new families–all good stuff. But let’s not kid ourselves that Major Crimes is about Sharon’s journey or feminism anymore. It’s not the decedent of The Closer I’d hoped it would be. It has always been a new and different show. But I came to it as an adult lesbian who had been so happy to see complex, tricky women so well represented. And now I get all these mens on my screen, and when I do get a new female character, it’s the disappointing Winnie Davis, falling into every old trope of Women Who Can’t Get Along. And wow. Wow, is that disappointing.

Soft and Safe Chapter One

(My first phanfic. Judge me. I don’t care)

To be fair, life had been extremely stressful for Dan. For the past year and a half, he had written an entire book and co-directed a stage show. Things that he literally had no training in before he had taken on the tasks. The small vacations that they had taken did nothing for his anxiety and while he was pretty decent at pretending he was alright around his friends, Phil knew that Dan was wound too tight. The moment that they would enter their flat, Dan would deflate. His shoulders would sag and his head would hang and it was obvious that the world just felt too heavy for him. Phil would ask if he wanted to talk about it, but Dan would weakly laugh it off.

“Don’t worry about me. I’m just tired”.

“What are you on about? This is just my face.”

“Oh Phil, you silly guy. I’m constantly a hot mess. You should know this by now.”

Phil would play along, smiling just as weakly. He knew that Dan was stressed, because Phil was stressed too. There were so many deadlines and press conferences and people in their face CONSTANTLY. Phil’s stress manifested itself in illness. He felt like he had been coughing and wheezing for months. Even still, he worried because Dan had no reprieve. The music didn’t calm him and he couldn’t focus on anything enjoyable. He always looked like he was two seconds away from a cataclysmic meltdown and it broke Phil’s heart. He wanted to help his friend more than he could possibly say. He wanted Dan to have a little place where no one asked him to do anything too hard and he could unwind. He wanted to see Dan’s natural light shine through. Fuck, he honestly just wanted him to be comfortable again.

Little place…

The thought had barreled through him suddenly and Phil sprang from the couch and lunged for his keys much to Dan’s surprise. They had been sitting in the living room watching Battlestar Galactica when Phil all of a sudden moved with haste to leave their apartment. It was uncharacteristic for Phil to not tell Dan where he was going. Though they had no real obligation to announce their comings and goings, it was an unspoken truth that Dan and Phil had a slight codependency issue. It wasn’t as if they were incapable of being apart from each other and sometimes they really did like their own private space. However, as a general rule of thumb, it was a slightly unnerving feeling to be separated from one another. Eating without the other one present felt foreign; incomplete. Touring had honestly made that fact more prominent. They went to different states daily, and had come to realize that the only thing that stopped them from panicking or being devastatingly homesick was the fact that they had each other to lean on. It was all innocent in its own right, but the staff and their friends did have to stifle giggles when Dan would dramatically call for Phil from across the venue because he wasn’t in his line of sight and he needed to know if this line sounded too cheesy or if the pose was too awkward. As it were, Dan didn’t want to come off as needy so he didn’t ask Phil why he was leaving. Phil was a grown man, and he could do whatever he wanted whenever he wanted.

The pang of worry and desperation that ghosted over Dan’s heart as he watched Phil put on his jacket would go away.

Phil skipped to the stairs with his keys and phone in hand. He gave Dan a hurried wave and headed towards the door. Dan put the episode on pause without a word and started messing around on the Internet while trying really really really hard to ignore how unbelievably silent the apartment was when Phil was gone. He tried not to let words like “stagnant” and “lonely” dance around in his mind. They were two separate people who needed to do things independently. Dan REALLY needed to accept that. The brown haired boy rolled his eyes at his actions and proceeded to do some premium shit posting for what felt like an eternity until he heard rattling downstairs that indicated Phil was returning. Dan didn’t move a muscle and tried very hard to show no excitement about the fact that his flatmate was back. The closer Phil’s footsteps got, the better he felt. Maybe it was weird, but he didn’t want to think about it too much. He just wanted Phil to come back so he could start breathing normally again.

When Phil entered the lounge, he looked winded and jittery. His awkward stance seemed even more awkward and he was chewing at his bottom lip while holding on to a paper bag for dear life.

Dan grunted, hoping that it came off as casual interest.

“Dan? Can we talk about something?”

Dan’s panic came back tenfold and he could feel his palms sweating as he placed his laptop on the coffee table. Why did Phil seem so serious and nervous? They were home.

“Sure, Phil. What’s up?”

“First off, I’m just going to be upfront. What I’m about to propose is weird and you 100% don’t have to do it. If you want, after I’m done speaking, you can act like this conversation never happened. Alright?”

Dan’s heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest from the anxiety. He didn’t know what was going on at all.


“You’ve seemed a bit off for a while now. I think I know why. I mean, life has been crazy for the both of us what with the book and the tour and everything. “
“Yeah. Things have been intense. I keep thinking that I’ll get a better handle on everything. I mean, we did BBC and I even did a documentary but it’s just been more overwhelming than I had thought it would be.”

Dan sighed heavily as if he had gathered it from the bottom of his soul. He was embarrassed but relieved to finally admit to Phil that he was having a hard time. It helped him feel like he wasn’t keeping a big secret. Phil smiled gently and began to open the paper bag. He pulled out a pacifier. It was baby blue with a little cartoon puppy in the middle. He also pulled out what appeared to be a dog collar. It was black and basic looking. Nothing to call home about.

Dan looked at the items and furrowed his brows.

“What are those for?”

“I know this sounds fucking crazy…but I kind of think that I could help you relax. I think we could help each other.”

“I’m not following”.

Phil felt himself blush. This might have been the worst thing he’s ever thought to do. It just seemed like it would be worth it.

“I was thinking we could turn the house into a kind of safe place. We know each other well and we trust each other. If you wanted, we could…role play…together.”

They both sat in silence for what felt like ages. Dan and Phil weren’t dating. Dan honestly didn’t even know if Phil dated at all. With the exception of some drunken rendezvous, they NEVER addressed anything romantic regarding one another. That was just for the shippers. It wasn’t anything real. Dan felt like he had heard something wrong, but the pacifier and collar were still in Phil’s pale hands.

“I’m sorry. This was a bad idea” Phil said, disheartened.


Phil looked at Dan who was studying the pacifier as if it was something he’d never seen before.

“What…what would we do?” Dan asked slowly.

“Whatever you wanted. I could wrap you in a blanket and give you the pacifier. You could watch your favorite movies and play video games. I could…I could feed you and bathe you.” Phil’s voice was little more than a whisper as if saying all of this too loudly would scare Dan away. When Dan started gazing at the collar, Phil cleared his throat and continued.

“If you wanted, I could put the collar on you and it could be more of a…pet…thing. I could pet you and you wouldn’t talk and I could teach you tricks and feed you treats out of my hand. Things like that.”

Dan was breathing shakily. It all sounded so nice, but it was so unexpected.

“Why…what made you want this?”

“I think we have a lot of responsibilities…and this could be an escape for us both.”

Dan looked into Phil’s breathtaking eyes and felt himself get light headed. He inhaled deeply, just now realizing that he was holding his breath.

“Th-that wouldn’t be weird for you? To do that? With me?”

Phil ducked his head down and smiled.

“No. I think I’d rather enjoy it. It doesn’t have to turn into anything sexual. I just want to be bonded to you.”

“What do you mean?” Dan asked while leaning in closer to Phil. The faint smell of his cologne made Dan feel warm and happy.

“I don’t know, Dan. Just…over the years, I’ve found myself wanting to be closer to you. I enjoy you. I just thought this could be something that we share. A little more intimate.”

Phil braved a glance, and was greeted with rosy cheeks and half lidded eyes. Dan looked as if he was under a trance, and Phil could feel his breath on his lips. Phil wanted to devour him. He wanted to kiss Dan breathless. He wanted to bite and lick at his pink lips and pale neck until he was littered with bruises. He wanted to place his hands around his throat and relish the noises of hearing an angel gasp for air. He wanted Dan so badly that he could barely stand it, but he didn’t want to push. He resisted the urge to kiss him and put the items back into the bag.


“Yes, Dan?”

“Are you sure you wouldn’t mind? If…”

“Not at all.”

Dan closed his eyes and imagined it. He imagined Phil feeding him applesauce while he wore one of their comfortable onesies. He imagined sucking on the pacifier while Phil’s soft hands played with his hair. He shivered, and looked down at his lap.

“I want that, Phil. I want…you to take care of me.”

“I’ll take such good care of you. I promise.”

Phil put his hand on Dan’s cheek and rubbed lightly. Never in his wildest dreams did he think that Dan would say yes, but he was going to make sure that he gave Dan everything he needed.

Dan closed his eyes and leaned in to the touch. He brought both hands up to meet the one on his cheek. Then, he slowly turned his head and opened his mouth. Phil watched in shock as Dan took Phil’s thumb into his mouth and began to suck it. The older man froze, unsure of the appropriate action to take. Dan’s mouth was warm and he was sucking as if he were feeding from a bottle. His soft tongue was gently pressed to the pad of Phil’s thumb and he was letting out barely audible moans of gratification.

They stayed like this for a few precious moments until Dan let the thumb fall from his mouth. They stared into one another’s eyes without a word. There was too much to say. There was nothing to say.

“Soon, Dan. I’m going to make you feel better so soon. I promise”

Dan nodded his head in understanding and stood up to go to his room. He had been through too many emotions and all he knew he needed in that moment was to lie the fuck down.

Phil headed to his room as well, head spinning and half a hard on straining his black denim jeans. As soon as he closed his door, he unbuttoned and unzipped his pants. He flopped down on his bed and roughly pulled down his pants and briefs until his penis was freed. He wasted no time, placing his hand around his cock and fucking up into his own hand. He put his other hand around his mouth, trying not to make enough noise for Dan to hear. He wanted to appear as neutral as possible until Dan gave him permission. Even still, images of fucking Dan into his mattress flooded his mind and he was bucking so erratically into his own hand that he was grateful that his headboard was too sturdy to hit the wall. He knew he wasn’t going to last long and after a few harsh thrusts and a twist of his wrists around his swollen head, he was spilling all over his hand. He panted for a few moments and then awkwardly reached for a towel from his laundry hamper.

Little did he know, Dan was in the room across from him, doing the exact same thing while gently whispering…



So last night I finished the final mini-season of Nikita. I hadn’t watched the show since the end of season three, however long ago that was, but I bombed through these last six episodes in a few days and damn they were good. I never seriously watched previous versions of the character (on TV or in movies), aside from catching bits and pieces of the movies on cable over the years, but I would recommend this show to anyone whether they’re a fan of the original/previous versions or not. Sure, it’s not high art, but its fun, and sometimes that’s all you need, right?

In order to share the love, let me lay out my case as for why you need to watch this show:

Maggie Q:

Someone give this woman her own starring role in a major action movie right now. Not only is she convincing in the action scenes, but she nails the drama and pathos, and brings energy to every scene she is in. If there was any fairness in Hollywood (HA!) she would have producers banging down her door. Where do I sign the petition for her headlining a Jessica Drew Spiderwoman movie?

Female Representation:

Although we may have more good female characters on TV than ever before, there is still a lot of work to be done towards better representation in mainstream media. So in that context its refreshing that in such an action-heavy genre show the main character, her partner/sidekick, and one of (arguably the main) antagonist are all women. You heard my spiel on Maggie Q above, Melinda Clarke again makes an amazing villain who is is alternatively moving and downright terrifying, and I can see that you could be skeptical about the girl from How I Met Your Mother playing a dramatically heavy action role but I say Lyndsy Fonseca pulled it off.

And it is not just about the individual characters, but while so many movies and shows cast all female characters as emotional rivals or jealous of one another, this show also goes to great lengths to ensure that the audience knows that the most important relationship in the show is the friendship between Nikita and Alex. As typical in a spy thriller pretty much every relationship involves at least a handful of double crosses but no matter what it is clear that Nikita and Alex really do care for one another, and even when they are enemies it is never in a “catty” way.

Keep reading

Me, Watching the 100, a recap
  • Me: Hmmm... Bellamy is the villain, Clark is the Annoying do gooder, Octavia is the bad girl, Jasper is cannon fodder, Monty is the brain, Finn is the love interest, Murphy is the undervillain, Wells is the sassy non gay friend who secretly pines for Clark, Abby is the good adult, Kane is the bad adult. Now where is the racoon eyed lesbian?
  • Me: And Jasper died quicker than I thought.
  • Me: Bellamy is unreasonably sexy for being such an asshole.
  • Me: Wait, Jasper is alive?
  • Me: Who is this Raven person, and why is she so hot?
  • Me: Okay, I did not see the little girl murdering the crap out of Wells coming, at all.
  • Me: Okay, Bellamy is still an asshole. A sexy, sexy asshole, but surprisingly, most of the people who are assholes on this show have really good reasons to be assholes.
  • Me: Also, Kane is less of an asshole than I thought.
  • Me: Let's torture the grounder, because torture *never* comes back to bite us on the ass. *facepalm*
  • Me: They killed Abby? Please... No, fuck, I'm not that lucky. She'll show up again in an episode or two.
  • Me: Damn! When Raven builds a bomb, girlfriend does not fuck around.
  • Me: Young kid we've never seen with a puppy crush on Clark. He's going to die.
  • Me: Yep, he's dead.
  • Me: I like Anya, but where is the Racoon eyed lesbian I was promised by the screen caps?
  • Me: I'm not even gonna get excited. No way they killed Finn.
  • Me: And I was right.
  • Me: This show apparently shops for minor supporting cast in the remainder bin of the Battlestar Galactica Going out of Business Sale.
  • Me: *sigh* And this is why you should have shot Murphy in the head when he first turned back up.
  • Me: Oh, somebody had a special effects budget to burn...
  • Me: Get it? Burn, cause the Ark is... nevermind.
  • Me: Wait, no, Bellamy the sexy beast is still outside! You can't roast him!
  • Me: Okay, Bellamy is still alive, but sadly, so is Finn.
  • Me: Yeah, yeah, we know, Mount Weather is secretly evil.
  • Me: Ha! The baby was all in Chancellor Crazy Pants' mind! Called it!
  • Me: Okay, actually, I didn't see the Reaper Connection coming, but that was kind of cool.
  • Me: Also, whoever came up with this is fucked in the head. I'm impressed.
  • Me: Disfigured kid gets one, maybe two episodes. CW doesn't have the balls to add someone to the cast who can't double as an Ambercrombie & Finch model
  • Me: Called it.
  • Me: You killed Anya, you bastards.
  • Me: Okay, do not, leave Abby in charge. No, Kane, do not give her the Chancellor pin. No! Fuck, Kane, you are dumb.
  • Me: Okay, giving Finn a gun is a bad idea. Give Murphy the gun. That's less likely to end badly.
  • Me: No, wait, don't give Murphy a gun without taking Finn's gun away.
  • Me: Jebus Mumping Fuck, Bellamy, you are dumb. Sexy, but dumb. Also, Sexy.
  • Me: Okay, the Racoon eyed lesbian finally arrives.
  • Me: The Racoon eyed lesbian is sadly not going to kill Jaha. What a pity.
  • Me: Oh, Jebus. One look and Racoon eyed POST APOCALYPTIC LESBIAN has it bad for Clark.
  • Me: Oh, dear. POST APOCALYPTIC LESBIAN does not fuck around when it comes to removing the competition.
  • Me: Oh, yuck. Finn back story. Because we're so interested.
  • Me: Is Clark going to... Oh, Fuck. That actually happened?
  • Me: Indra is kind of crushing on Octavia, not that I blame her.
  • Me: POST APOCALYPTIC LESBIAN is actually a canon lesbian... Dayum.
  • Me: POST APOCALYPTIC LESBIAN needs to work on her dating skills.
  • Me: Jebus, Clark, aim for the damn head.
  • Me: Bellamy, why are you so sexy?
  • Me: I know some important stuff is happening with a missile, but really, did you just see how Clark and Lexa looked at each other?
  • Me: Abby, please shut up. Lexa is trying to seduce your daughter.
  • Me: Wait, they are kissing! WOOHOO!!!
  • Me: What do you mean, not yet? Finn's been dead for like, five episodes. That's about six episodes longer than it's possible to be upset about him dying.
  • Me: Seriously, no. Make out some more. Shove the model of Mount Weather on the floor and have sex on the table.
  • Me: *sigh* Clark, your game sucks.
  • Me: Wait, no! Lexa, don't do it. No! You love Clark. You...
  • Me: Fuck everyone who convinced me to watch this show. And fuck Bellamy for still being sexy.
The 100 Season 3 Request: Slow Down Just A Little


If I have one overall idea about what “The 100” could do in its third season, it’s this: More “Colonial Day.” That’s an episode of “Battlestar Galactica” in which we got to see the characters socializing and relaxing, at least for a little while. We saw different sides of them as they celebrated a holiday, and that episode and others like it helped cement my affection for them and my interest in their lives. I truly appreciate the energetic pace of “The 100”, its moral gravity and its ability to come up with believable but shocking twists, but having some lighter moments can help the darker aspects of any show stand out. Also, purely character-driven moments can also just be fun to watch. I liked watching Raven and Wick bicker about engineering dilemmas; I like seeing Jasper and Monty hang out; I like seeing what happens when characters are not on the run or being beaten up. When a show pays attention to its forward momentum but gives the people in the story a chance to reaffirm their bonds with each other within non-traumatizing situations, it can really pay off in the long term. I’m not saying “The 100” needs an influx of kittens and rainbows — this is not that kind of show — but adding a little more tonal and emotional variety might be a welcome thing when the show returns. It’s just a thought.

I have to say I agree with this sentiment. I’ve been re-watching Battlestar Galactica, and it’s surprisingly a quite relaxing show compared with The 100. The pace of that show, while they do face similarly bleak situations and dangerous encounters, is nowhere near of that of The 100 in Season 2. 

Regardless of which characters you care about the most in CW’s show, there’s always this sense that you’re being whipped around at a frantic pace and you never get to spend enough time with any group before it’s on to the next batch. 

Those quiet moments in between battles and disasters, however, are what help us identify with and understand the characters better. Some of my favorite scenes from this show have been these lower-key moments - like Clarke talking to her dad while hallucinating; Kane coming to Abby post-shocklashing filled with regret and making her chancellor while he effectively left on a suicide mission; Raven and Wick or Octavia and Lincoln’s moments of, errr, bonding; plus backstories like Octavia’s first foray out of her hole on the Ark for that party or the whole Spacewalker thing, which finally made me like Finn. 

I know there’s a big plot to move forward, but how about telling a few stories about the struggles of everyday survival in Season 3, now that the wars with Mt. Weather and the Grounders are over, and that with the AI has yet to begin (um, again, I guess)? 

For starters, Abby needs to come to terms with letting Clarke go. She will find out next season that Clarke has left camp, and she needs to find an identity beyond being a protective mother. That ship has sailed.

I’d love to see Abby becoming a good Chancellor in the wake of Clarke’s departure, for example, organizing jobs and hunting expeditions and making sure her people have food, shelter, water, and supplies (and new clothes! Go raid Mt. Weather, by the way!) She should form a new council with Bellamy on board, and give him a ton of responsibility. 

I’d love to see Abby and Kane as well as Raven and Wick developing their own relationships outside the threat of imminent war or certain death. 

I’d love to see the characters fight their way through recovery from their physical pain, too - Raven and Abby will have serious healing to do from the marrow extraction, and will probably have a hard time being laid up in bed or unable to walk. Likely the show will just jump forward to the point where they’re healed, but it doesn’t have to. Remember when Starbuck’s leg was injured, and she wouldn’t immediately get out of bed until confronted about it? Or how Laura Roslin overdid her drugs, and then faced the consequences of trying to beat cancer by taking 3x the meds?

Those situations helped define those characters, but all we see is stuff like this: beam falls on Kane’s leg, nearly killing him. Next scene, he’s just walking around with a slight limp. Surely we missed something in between? 

I’d also love to see Clarke’s “walkabout” not turning into an immediate disaster where she’s running from a rabid bear or whatever, but one where she gets a chance reflect on her emotional pain and come to terms with it - yes, with only her - not “Clexa” - on the screen. (More like when Jaha came to Earth…or like most of the movie “Castaway” Ha!). 

Let’s see Murphy just hanging around his new fancy house, and slowly discovering whose house it was and what that guy did and the horror of that. Let’s see Jasper’s friends try to help him get over Maya’s loss, and new bonds form. 

Let’s meet some of the other kids and grown-ups, and sort of expand that world of Camp Jaha. I’m actually curious about how that whole thing runs - are parts of the Ark still livable? Are they trying to grow food yet? Can’t they build a shower already? Are they trying to take the Ark apart and re-use it to build housing? What do people do all day there?

I’m just saying: let’s give these Sky People a moment to live, not just survive, and see what that even looks like. (Clarke hinted at this being necessary, when she said something of the sort to Lexa.) 

I’m not saying don’t keep us on the edge of our seats, or tell the big story. But give us all a moment to breathe every now and then in the next season. 

Is it October yet?

fic: Appearances Can Be Deceiving

Eren finds Levi’s tumblr and is more than a little confused by contrast between the man he knows in real life and his online persona.

Based off of this tumblr post

me irl: speaks in a fairly monotone voice, doesnt smile a lot, literally gets told i seem dead inside

me online: uses double exclamations points!!  says things like omg and aah and oooooooooooooh a lot.  screams at cute pictures of cats

[also on AO3] words: 3.5Kish rating:T+

Eren may or may not have a huge crush on his maths tutor.

Yep, that’s right, the twenty-two year old, five-foot-three, perpetually impassive man who somehow made trigonometric calculus sexy. The teenager spent most of his time wondering why on earth each tutoring session couldn’t turn out at least a little bit more like a porno. Instead he simply had to sit there and attempt to pay attention to the explanations the guy was giving rather than the entrancing way his mouth moved.

Keep reading

Platonic Shoulder Holding

Inspired by this post.

Coerced by this post.

Thank you to my wonderful Olicity Beta Rachel

Rating: PGish


The Arrow cave was quiet. Oliver and Diggle were out scouting the city. Starling City had been “too quiet” in their opinion, so they were taking it upon themselves to ensure there was no “under city plots” afoot.

Felicity sat at her computers, waiting to hear if they needed her to run a search, or remote hack a security system. It was unusual for her to have downtime in the Arrow Cave, so of course she was using her time wisely – she was catching up on Community.

Keep reading