you should be living it

AESTHETIC: Theo Raeken, the first chimera

Listen closely to what I’m about to say,
I think I’ve heard just about enough of your hypocritic ways,
Don’t try and stop me now,
Don’t you make a sound.
You built yourself up oh so high,
Just to tear me down.
I’m so tired of you telling me,
How to live and what I should not be.
And I’m so tired of you telling me, 
What to do and what I don’t believe.
And after all that you’re telling me,
Why there’s hate and only you can see.
And I’m so sick of you telling me.
THAT I WILL BURN I WILL NOT BE FREE.

Winchester's Guardian

Chapter 1: Drink Myself To Death
(Supernatural fanfic series )

~Warnings: sadness, drinking, violence, mentions of suicide, cuteness, cussing~

Cas was dead. He was never coming back, and it was ripping Dean apart at the seems. The overwhelming guilt that he felt at not saving his lover was killing him, and he ended up spending almost all his nights at bars.

Sam would tag along to try and comfort his big brother—and to drive him home afterwards. On hunts he’s been more reckless and careless. Sam had to save Dean a several times. Every time he did, Dean always told him “you should have let me die. I have nothing left to live for.” It made Sam very sad to see his big brother in shambles like this. His heart went out to his big brother Dean.

“Why don’t you let me die, Sam?” Dean asked one night as he lay drunkenly in his motel bed, his eyes red and puffy from crying.
Sam sighed as he got in to bed with him. He took Dean’s face gently in to his hands making him look in to his brown and loving eyes as he spoke.

“Dean you’re my big brother and I love you. You’re family, and I’m not gonna let you kill yourself if I can help it. I know Cas is dead and I miss him a lot too. God, Dean, he was like a brother to me. But Dean, you are family, and family is forever. We never leave family behind,” Sam said as he snuggled close to Dean. They fell asleep hugging each other. Sam never told his brother that he’d been crying himself to sleep.
-
The next night Sam and Dean are at Dean’s favorite bar. It wasn’t fancy, and there wasn’t even a big crowd—just a few regulars. It was a place to forget your troubles. Sadly for Dean it wasn’t working—he was super drunk. Sam never seen him this drunk before, and he was pretty scared to see Dean like this—he had started to become very man and irritable.

“Dean, let’s go home, big guy, please,” Sam said in a nice, calm voice. In an attempt to calm his big brother, he pulled him into a hug.

“FUCK YOU, SAM! I’M NEVER COMING HOME, GOD DAMN IT. I’M GONNA DRINK MYSELF TO DEATH!!!” Dean shouted as he pushed Sam against the wall, hard.
“Dean, let me go and let’s go the fuck home. Come on, damn it! Do you think Cas would want this?” Sam asked as he tried to wiggle out of Dean’s tight grasp.

“FUCK YOU, SAM! WHO THE FUCK CARES WHAT CAS WOULD WANT, HE’S DEAD DAMN IT!!! HE’S GONE, AND I LOVED HIM. I LOVED HIM AND HE LEFT ME.” Dean shouted, slurring, as he pounded his fist in to Sam’s face.

“Dean please stop and let’s go home. I won’t hurt you. I know it’s hard losing a lover and a best friend. Bro, Cas would be disappointed,” Sam pleaded as blood streamed from his nose. He was scared, but knew his brother needed him.

Sam didn’t move as Dean continued to hit him. He tried his best not to hit back. He knew how much Dean had loved Cas, but finally a blow to his jaw got him pissed. He drew back his fist and was going to hit Dean, but something grabbed his shoulder. Sam didn’t see anyone, but the touch felt familiar to him. Then he heard a voice—normally he’d be freaked out, but the voice soothed him.
“Sam, go home. Let me take care of Dean. I promise everything will be okay.” the familiar voice said as Sam wiggled out of Dean’s grasp. He drove Baby back to the motel feeling better about his brother.

Dean drunk some more Jack after Sam left. He was so drunk he was almost falling off his stool. He struggled to his feet and turn to face the door.

“How dare my brother compare losing Cas to losing a friend. He was Cas, the honest to goodness love of my life. I never got to tell him how much I really loved him.” Dean said with a hiccup as he stumbled towards the door. He would have fallen, but something unseen grabbed his shoulder.

“Dean, I know you love me and I love you. I’m here to watch over you and your bother. You may not be able to see me but I’m here. Who knows maybe I’ll come back to life some day.” Dean knew that voice well. He smiled as he felt warm gentle pressure on his lips like he was being kissed.

“Cas, I love you, man, and I miss you. I’m glad you’re here—even if I can’t see you, just hearing your voice makes me happy,” Dean slurred happily as a drunken smile came over his face. Cas took him to the hotel. Everyone looked in amazement as Dean floated down the street. The looks of confusion made Dean giggle drunkenly.

Dean awoke the next morning with a killer hangover. He convinced himself it was only a dream or a drunken illusion—even though Sam tried to tell him it was all real.
Dean would soon see how real it all was.

To Be Continued……

________big thanks to______________________

@not-natural-moose-and-squirrel for help editing and helping me out with ideas. Sending lots of love.

Some of my favorite blogs : @super-not-naturall @attackdogcas @idedicatethisblogtodestiel @impalaimagining @iwingedbouquetcloud @wayward-oneshots @angelicbadass @akfmywaywardfandom

@angelicbadass @thesupernaturaldead
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Travis Scott broke the record for most times performing one song in a concert yesterday (may 16th 2017) when he performed “Goosebumps” 14 times in one show

anonymous asked:

Maddie.......... who is chihoko.......

Hahaha okay I’ll try and sum it up! All of this information is courtesy denkimouse on Twitter so you should definitely go read their explanation as well!! They live-tweeted the event and shared a lot of great information! I’m going to be cutting a lot of details lololol

PSA: I just woke up and am still shook so if anything is inaccurate I apologize and please let me know!!!

At the event there was a stage-reading of a YOI story! Victor, Yuuri, and many others are in Hasetsu before a skating show and get drunk. Victor is helping Yuuri stretch and Yuuri says something, a bit slurred, about how “Chihoko is more flexible” than he is.

The next morning, Victor is missing! Yurio is mad and blames Yuuri, nobody can find him anywhere. Victor is naked and stretching on top of a castle, essentially trying to prove that he’s more flexible than this CHIHOKO PERSON. Yuuri is like “o my god.” Victor asks Yuuri to join him and Yuuri Katsuki actually strips off of his clothes and goes to stretch on top of the castle with Victor.

Tidbits:

  • Chihoko isn’t a real person, Victor just misheard him
  • People accused Yurio of getting rid of Victor because Yurio had show name ideas including “Yuri On Darkness, Yuri On Galaxy, etc.”
  • Seung-gil kissed Nishigori?? shook
  • When Yuuri woke up (the morning after getting drunk) “Overcome Chihoko” was written on his back
  • This:
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{ 04.17 } 渡辺 曜 *: ・゚ ♡

Happy Birthday You!! (⌒▽⌒)☆

5

everybody lives AU | AKATSUKI
• setting — the Last

Akatsuki becomes a mercenary group for hire, as they did in Road to Ninja. 
This is more appropriately named the “everybody comes back to life and somehow things work out AU”… but as promised, 10 Akatsuki members in the timeline of The Last! Designing is fun (esp the village flak jackets) (・∀・)

See more extensive character/AU details below the cut!:

Keep reading

MatPat: *takes a deep breath*

MatPat: i lo-

Jason: yes, you love Stephanie, we know, you love Stephanie so much, she’s the light of your life, you love her so much, you just love Stephanie we KNOW, you love Stephanie you fucking love Stephanie okay we know, we get it, YOU LOVE STEPHANIE FUCKING PATRICK. WE GET IT.

In a healthy relationship,...

everyone needs to make compromises.

But that doesn’t mean you should feel like you’re losing out on yourself.

When you started going out, you both had your own lives and that shouldn’t change.

Neither of you should have to pretend to like something you don’t, or give up seeing your friends, or drop out of activities you love.

And you also should feel free to keep developing new interests, making new friends and moving forward.

People always say find reasons to keep living when you’re depressed. And you should, but they don’t have to be deep or profound reasons.

Keep living because a book you want to read doesn’t come out until next month.

Keep living because your mom said she’d make your favorite food for dinner.

Keep living because the weather is supposed to be nice tomorrow and you can go swimming, or biking, or just sit on the lawn.

Your reason doesn’t have to be “because I’ll find my purpose” or something equally grandiose. Stay alive because you want to visit the neighbor’s dog. Because of that movie you want to see. Because you want to read one more book, draw one more picture, cook one more meal, take one more walk.

Find those small reasons to keep going and then keep finding them. Sometimes those anchors can keep you afloat and that’s all you need. To keep staying afloat until it does get easier.

You can do this. Keep on living.

On a weekly basis, you do so many things that should make you proud. You get out of bed on the days that are hard, you smile through the bad days, you go to work even though you hate it. You do a extremely large amount of things that you don’t want to do, or that you find difficult. You are so brave for living your life, you should be proud of everything.
— 

Are you proud? by Amy Kennedy

05/05/17

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