Pulse Part 13
Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Warnings: Injuries, you’re gonna squeal i can’t wait
Summary: Soulmate AU in which one’s heartbeat becomes perfectly in sync with their soulmate’s once they meet.
The following week or so had become a routine. Bucky would cater to your every want and need, making you food that you could keep down, scratching your arms or back to calm you, helping you bathe, and just talking about nothing and everything. The two of you had really gotten to know each other better than he ever thought you could in the small amount of time you had together, and you still had a couple more days to spend with him before his fiancée came home.
His fiancée. Bucky had barely even thought of her since the crash. She had been constantly texting and calling him, no doubt wondering why he wasn’t in contact with her while she was away, but he couldn’t bring himself to even send her a simple text. He knew she was probably worried, but he felt a surge of guilt in the pit of his stomach whenever he just saw her name flash across his cell phone screen. He knew he wasn’t in a relationship with you, but the draw he felt toward you was undeniable, and he felt he would be betraying that loyalty he felt by acknowledging his planned marriage with this other woman.
He needed to eventually, though, whether it be to confirm his relationship with Samantha or to end it altogether. Something needed to be done, but he couldn’t break off years of friendship and love over the phone. She needed to come home first, and then, once he saw her in person and looked into her blue eyes, if he felt like it would be best to let her go, he would.
In the meantime, however, all of his focus was on you. On the way you gently curled into the sheets of his bed, careful of the incision on your side. On the way you giggled at his playful jokes and groaned at the mention of the time left until you could take your next painkiller. On the way your hair was tangled beyond belief from moving your head against the pillow so much. On the way your stressed body was still so antsy to get out of bed that he almost wanted to force you back down every time you sat up in fear that you would hurt yourself.
It was passed time for you to start walking by yourself though. The routine of it all was supposed to help, and getting back to normal right away was of upmost important when it came to your injuries. Bucky had been trying to prolong it as long as possible though, because he didn’t want to see you in more pain than you were already in.
He watched as you stretched your legs out in front of you, wincing only slightly at the pull in certain areas. “Can I go make lunch for myself?”
“Getting sick of my cooking?” He deflected.
“More like getting sick of just sitting here. I want to get up.”
You didn’t even wait for his response as you started making your move to rise from the bed. His hands immediately rushed to your aid to help ease the strain, and you gratefully let him use some of his own strength to lift you off the bed and to a sitting position.
“This makes me nervous,” he admitted.
You rolled your eyes even though your heart warmed at his confession. “I’m fine.”
“Your car was hit so hard it flipped upside down. You were impaled with metal.”
He sighed. “Give me your hand.”
Only being able to offer your right one due to your left being in the cast, his other fingers lightly grasped the upper arm that was uncovered to help balance both sides of your body and take the weight off of the side with the incision.
“How are your ribs?” He asked as he helped you stand. Your knees shook from the little walking you had been doing, but they felt much better now that you were standing.
“They’re fine. Feel the same as when I’m laying down.”
“So not good,” he clarified.
You gave him a look before starting to take slow steps toward the kitchen. Bucky was hovering over you your whole way there, arms out and ready to catch you or hold you if something were to happen. Once you finally made it to the cupboards, you opened one and went to reach for a box before Bucky stopped you from stretching.
“No,” was all he said as he reached to the top shelf for you and got your favorite cereal down. “Don’t push it.”
You got the milk out of the fridge in the meantime, turning to watch as Bucky got a bowl down for you and started to pour the cereal inside. “Hey! I was supposed to be making this.”
He scoffed. “It’s cereal. Making this as your own dinner isn’t much of an accomplishment.”
“You’re just mad I made you get Captain Crunch Berries and not the peanut butter kind.”
Your hand shook slightly as you tried to balance the mostly full milk in your right hand to pour into the bowl. Your side and ribs ached as your abdominal muscles clenched to help support the weight. Bucky noticed your struggle and lifted the bottom of the carton while you held the handle.
“Of course I’m mad. Getting a Captain Crunch that isn’t peanut butter is a sin.”
He helped lower the milk down before screwing the cap back on and returning it to the fridge for you. The fridge that had bills and unopened but important mail stuck unto it, many of the envelopes addressed to Samantha Reed. You tried not to let it damper your mood, you did, but it was difficult as you felt yourself falling more in love with Bucky. The past couple of days you had spent there you had really gotten to know him more and there wasn’t one part of what you learned that you didn’t like. You were completely and utterly fascinated by him. If you were close before from being soulmates, you were even closer now as you laughed together, shared details on your histories and favorite things to do…
“(Y/N)? You okay?” Bucky asked as he watched you stare at your untouched cereal.
You didn’t know how to answer. What was going to happen when you had to leave in two or three days. Where were you going to go? Who was going to care for you?
You knew Steve would offer to keep you safe and have Natasha stay as well to help, but that seemed to you like going in circles. You didn’t want to go back there and have another emotional breakdown. You wanted to move forward, but you didn’t know how to when you have been letting yourself stay out of reality.
Because that’s what this was: unrealistic. In a few days you will be gone. Bucky will be back with his fiancée in this loft where he would pretend you never stayed in the first place. Things would go back to being awkward and tense between the two of you. You would still have a madman stalking you, threatening you, slowly driving you to insanity. And you would be alone again. Because that was what always happened.
“What’s going on?”
Bucky’s hand softly landed on the small of your back. You swallowed. You were so tired of being alone. You didn’t want this feeling of love you had developed in the small amount of time you had been living with him to go away. You wanted to swim in the depths of it- to drown in it.
You turned slowly to face him, his palm going from your back to the counter near your side, leaning into you as you looked up to him. His eyebrows were furrowed in concern, his eyes bright.
His jaw tense before loosening.
His eyelashes fluttering as he blinked.
His lips so pink.
His lips so… soft.
Soft. That was the last word that flowed through your head before everything completely left. Your mind became a blank slate as your body completely relaxed. You were leaning into him, his touch on you- everywhere- but nowhere at the same time as he remained as careful as possible. His lips moved against yours, gentle but hungry, his teeth nipping lightly in between kisses.
You could barely pay attention to where you were putting your hand, too overwhelmed by the feeling in your chest as you finally connected with your soulmate. Everything snapped into place. It was like a puzzle piece- a perfect fit that completed the picture. It was a wire that had been missing that was now fixed and helped to light up the entire room. Your body was floating, relaxed as it no longer felt pulled on, drawn, exhausted from trying to find your person. Relieved as you finally found him.
He pulled back with a gasp, one of his thumbs running light circles over your bruised ribs, the other hand firmly pulling you toward him by your lower back. He squeezed his eyes shut in an almost painful gesture, grimacing as he rested his forehead on yours. “I’m feeling so much right now my heart hurts.”
Your right hand came up to stroke his stubble-covered jaw. “Don’t run away from that.”
He didn’t reply as he attempted to control his breathing, put out not from the loving kisses that the two of you shared but from the wave of emotions tugging at his heart as it sped up in rate.
“But Samantha-” he started, and you immediately opened your eyes, pushing his chest back with your one available hand and avoiding eye contact at all cost. “No, I just meant that I need to talk to her before we do anything else. I don’t want to be that person.”
“Bucky,” you tried to reason against your own morals, “I’m your soulmate. I think she’ll understand.”
He didn’t say anything once again and that’s when the self-doubt started to kick in. Was he worried about cheating or did he really want Samantha in the end?
“What are we doing, Bucky? Playing house until the person you actually love comes home and you toss me in the corner once again? Apologize, maybe cry to make me feel an ounce of sympathy for you?”
“No! No, no no, (Y/N), not at all-” he rushed out.
“-then what?! I understand that you want to be a good guy, but you weren’t worried about being a good guy when you hurt me ten times over! Only for her, right?”
You wished you would have stopped talking at his wounded look, but you kept going. “Look at the physical pain I have been put through. Mentally- emotionally, I feel even worse. ‘Cause of you.”
“I want to-”
“I’m not playing these games anymore. If I need to get out of this city to get away from you and that fucking maniac, then I will. This isn’t fair to me, Bucky, and you know it. You fucking know i-”
You froze at his outburst, watching as his face softened after yelling, his footsteps slow and his hand raking through his hair before his arms caged you back against the counter. He tried to keep his face passive and strong, but his muscles relaxed and his blue eyes were warm as they bore into yours. His soft lips were parted and you wanted to cry at how much you wanted to just dive into his arms.
And then he was kissing you again and you were flying. Nothing had ever felt as good, as fulfilling, as wholesome, pure, loving, warming, encompassing as it did to be in Bucky’s arms with his mouth on yours. You were completely and utterly a mess.
When his warm breath hit your lips as he pulled back, you looked into his eyes. The two of you were as close as before, and you were tempted to diminish the distance once again, but he spoke before you could.
“I don’t love her like I love you.”
And then the distance closed.
OKAY this is unedited and not proofread so I’m sorry for any mistakes ily and i’m sorry for the wait i’ll write sooner again if you give me feedback ok thx