you owe me these

hunk: [stubs his toe] ow, shit!

pidge: [freezes] wait…what did you just say?

hunk: [confused] um…ow?

pidge: no, no, after that.

hunk: ohhh. i said shit. because i stubbed my toe and it hurt - and, frankly, it still does hurt, but i’m okay, thanks for asking.

pidge: you said shit?? i can’t believe this. you actually cursed!

hunk: uh…yeah, i did. 

pidge: holy- holy shit! [runs out of the room] keith, you owe me ten dollars!

anonymous asked:

I'm not a huge Drarry fan but what do you think Snape's reaction might be if he saw them together?

*Harry and Draco are making out against a wall and think that nobody can see them, but Severus and Minerva totally see*

Snape: *spits out his tea*

Minerva: You weren’t even drinking tea, Severus.

Severus: Was I? Minerva? Was I?

Minerva: You owe me a galleon. I told you this would happen.

Severus: Take it. But promise to Obliviate me first. The horrible sight of their underthings has burned itself onto my corneas and it burns. IT BURNS I TELL YOU.

Minerva: *clucks* You always were a sore loser, Severus.

Severus: Obliviate. Now.

Guys I’m in a restaurant right now aaaaand i found Milky’s ice cream.

Milky: WOOOAAAHH I WANT FREE TASTE
Me: XD You owe me Php 35.00 :3 No free taste.

Milky: FINE. -3-

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HELLO AGAIN, MISS SCHMIDT.  OH, EXCUSE ME, MISSUS SCHMIDT.  I SUPPOSE CONGRATULATIONS ARE IN ORDER.  AH, LUCIUS DE LEON.  IT’S BEEN A WHILE. HOW ARE YOUR SIBLINGS?”

“They’re well, sir.  You know how they are, keeping their heads buried in books most of the time.  Have you seen my father lately?”

Death shuddered.  HAVE YOU WATCHED THE NEWS LATELY?  HE’S KEEPING VERY BUSY THESE DAYS.  I’M UP TO MY EARS IN WORK BECAUSE OF HIM.  IF I HAD EARS.  THE EUPHEMISM WORKS BETTER IF I HAVE EARS.

“I feel ya, buddy.  Can you help me dispose of this body before any of his ‘children’ pick up on it?”

I AM NO TRASH COLLECTOR, YOUNG MAN.

“C’mon, don’t you owe me for that thing in Prague? We’ll call it even if you help me out here.”

The responding sigh sounded like the rattling of bones.  VERY WELL.  With a wave of Death’s hand, Vlad’s body disappeared.  He then looked down at his tablet.  WHOOPS, I HAVE ANOTHER APPOINTMENT.  HAVE A NICE EVENING, AND CONGRATULATIONS AGAIN ON THE WEDDING.  IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL CEREMONY.

Just as he began to fade away, Death spoke one more time.

SEE YOU SOON.

D.Va and the Leviathan


For some reason I’ve been thinking about D.Va a lot lately - there’s just something about someone tackling such crazy odds with her attitude that’s a lot of fun

Also bonus close-up so you can see the detail in that kaiju-bot:

So this magnificent person brought this picture to HousCon for j2 to sign: 

and shares the story of getting it signed here

‘…the volunteer called Clif…over to check it out. He said Jensen wishes he looked like that. I gave it to the handler and she starts giggling. Clif is waiting for Jensen to see it. She hands it to Jensen and he starts laughing. He says I wish I had guys who looked like that to wash my car. He signs it but keeps staring at it for like a minute and finally gives it back. 

I get in line for Jared….Jared’s handler who seems like a tough chick said ‘what the fuck!’ and then apologised and said Jared still kind of looks like that. She hands it to Jared and he’s like ‘oh my God’. Then he takes out his phone, scrolls through something and looks at the art again….Jared is comparing himself in a shirtless picture on his phone to a shirtless drawing of himself!!! He’s wondering why Jensen has the better abs. He signs it and tells me to draw him with more abs next time. I’m thinking ‘I didn’t draw it!’ but say ok I will!’

BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE! Someone else was at autos and witnessed this

‘I had seen [Jared] exclaiming over a girl’s art…From what I could see, I think there was a shirtless Dean. She left and we stepped forward. I was watching Jared, but somehow I looked up when all of a sudden here comes Jensen sauntering up to Jared’s table. Watching that man walk is a religious experience. Anyway, he came right up behind Jared and grabbed him in what looked like it was going to be a headlock, but turned into a really sweet hug with Jensen’s arm around his neck and his chin on his shoulder. Jared was in the middle of signing and didn’t really react, just smiled softly….Jared then said, ‘Hey! I just saw a picture of you with abs!’ Jensen…said ‘I haven’t had abs since 1992!’ and walked out the door. Jared said ‘yeah more like 19….30′ while looking at me since Jensen was already gone.’ 

THIS IS ALL PURE GOLD but that last bit in particular slakes my constant thirst for Jared calling Jensen an old man (’while looking at me’ etc I DIE). 

HAPPY EASTER!!♡ U( ˃ㅅ˂ ✿)U

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“Though time only moves one way, we can still relive “those days” in our minds.”

                                           Chapter 133: Memories in the Rain 2 - “The Nocturne”

Happy Birthday to my friend, Anjali (@a-ogiri)