you need to tell me if this shouldnt go in the tag

the situation on bts’ colorism in the japanese magazine

this is a long post, however i believe theres lots to understand on this subject that cannot be dismissed. i have two disclaimers: first, please read until the end before criticizing because when i say i made an effort to include all views i mean it. second, there will be hetero references in this since the interview was about their ideal girl.. i apologize n i dont mean to assume their sexuality or anything.

there are three main parts to this; 1) lets understand the whole picture, 2) be fair and 3) for those who were hurt by the “interview” and to those who want to dismiss them (this is not patronizing, i really fucking sympathize here)

lets understand the whole picture

to begin, I’m pretty much positive they didn’t actually interview bts for the magazine… rather, they drew on old interviews for the magazine… i don’t think the members were actually involved in any way with this magazine specifically. there a few posts about this and i’ll like them, but the best was by @jkguks. they showed how each exact response was recycled from an old interview. the post can be found here. comments have also been made that this magazine is known for such moves in the past and that their credibility isn’t so great. @allforbts pointed out here that the magazine didnt have a photoshoot – they reused pictures from other sources – which probably indicates they didn’t have an actual interview; however this isn’t real evidence. in my own personal opinion i dont trust the person who posted the translations on twitter. yes the translations are correct as far as we all know, but what i mean is… i think she knew the interview was old/reused. everyone that asked about the interview’s date received no response from her. she even made a comment about how many followers shes gained. if she cleared up that the interview was old or reused then this whole thing would die out n she’d stop getting followers. anyway i find it suspicious but i could also just be reading too far into it. the whole point of this is that at this point we can pretty much conclusively say that the interview is recycled n this is not something they said recently. this is not to devalue the weight of their words because it still hurt a lot of people. old or new, getting told your skin color is “unideal” is painful. however we do wanna look at this because we at least now know that their status of “since educated on colorism and racism and now pretty pc/sensitive” is not going to be revoked! they’ve since educated themselves, that is still the truth. this is just the ugly past come to rear its head.

on the other end of understanding the whole picture, i’m going to make a sorta controversial statement. hopefully in fully explaining it, you all will get the full idea… but for the sake of k-armys who are getting attacked by intl fans constantly and also for the sake of perspective – which may lessen the blow of their words for those hurt by them – i need to say this. the concept of colorism is alive and well in korea… it just isn’t the same as it is in the west. in the west – for the most part – we are more ethnically/racially diverse while korea is almost entirely racially/ethnically homogeneous. so how does this effect the meaning of colorism? well because one of the largest identifiable traits when looking at the differences between the world’s races n ethnicities is skin color, race/ethnicity will always be tied to skin color, especially in really diverse areas. in the west where we are consistently exposed to different races/ethnicities as part of our daily lives, a preference of skin color holds not only colorist implications but also racist implications. if some mayo dude said “i think darker skin is ugly on girls” we can safely assume hes a racist fuck on top of being colorist. however, since korea is homogenous, there isnt any real racist implications. let me elaborate: korea has issues with being racist against other poc, however in an interview discussing ideal types where the ideal type is already assumed to be at the very basis korean (or maybe another east asian ethnicity if you’re stretching it), the statement on skin color is directed at people of their shared race. so how is this less problematic? it is still problematic definitely – i’d like to make this clear – but in korea, the concept of skin color amongst koreans as a beauty standard isnt racially or ethnically motivated and therefore its more akin to saying “i prefer blue eyes over brown eyes on white girls” because they’re discussing a physical variance within their own race. in the end, it’s still colorist, but please try to understand that in korea the remarks arent as horrible. they still shouldn’t say that, and really, any discussion of skin color preferences is ugly, but it’s extremely important to be considerate of korean culture. intl fans forget constantly that we are guests to korean culture. if you were invited to someones house you wouldnt bust in there feeling entitled n doing whatever the fuck you want. you’d try and respect their rules and how they run their home. if you had a problem with something there, you’d politely ask them to accommodate you, explaining why that accommodation was necessary. you wouldnt fucking trash them for not having their house already equipped to your preference. thats incredibly selfish. this is the same way. you are guests to this culture, and while you shouldnt allow colorism to continue, this theme of entitlement amongst intl fans – especially when we have done very little to respect their culture; we demand they understand ours while continually paying theirs no regard – is really shamefully. i ask that people reading this do their best to be more considerate in the future. not everything is black n white… lots of things have grey area and we can afford to be more socially conscious. im pretty sure most k-fans have it about up to here dealing with koreaboos criticizing their culture… 

be fair

this is a short statement but i need to remind you all that most of the members were problematic in that interview and if you are only trashing namjoon you need to fucking stop. you are allowed to offended, of course – i was pretty bothered too seeing how im the opposite to namjoons ideal in every way, my bias who i’d fucking die for – but if your whole focus is “namjoon this and namjoon that” than youre being a biased ass and im gonna need you to sit down. if youre going to be mad, by all means, be mad, but dont fucking pretend the other members said nothing wrong. im sick of people pretending every member but namjoon is perfect and unproblematic. present day he’s probably the most un-problematic member since educating himself on racial issues, feminism, n lgbtq rights, making himself an advocate for them all while idols remain silent…. hmm…. but keeping pushing that “problematic member” agenda sure. yeah lets pretend the facts dont exist ok

for those who were hurt by the “interview” and to those who want to dismiss them

fans who read through the interview n realized they kinda fit their bias’ ideal type – esp in terms of skin color – please don’t make comments on how people need to “get over this”. for many fans, especially non light skinned poc, this really hurt. not only as a “i don’t fit my bias’ ideal type” but also as a betrayal of trust. many non light skinned poc have experienced some type of discrimination for their skin color and many had their sense of self confidence fucked over for it. its not just a “you dont think darker skin is beautiful, aw :(” its more of a, “you are someone i love and support and the fact that you’d call my skin color less attractive – the skin color for which i’ve had to struggle to find my own confidence in – just like so many others, feels like betrayal”. its really hurtful. so don’t be dismissive. you don’t understand. this isnt your discussion, im sorry.

and lastly, to the fans who were hurt by the interview. im sorry boo. im sorry that the industry you support continues to hurt you. im sorry someone you decided to love and support made you feel like that. please remember that the ideal type is such a flimsy concept. they really dont mean anything. those questions were grossly specific n they were so unnecessary, but at the end of the day, they are still made up preferences. the boys wouldn’t find you unattractive for not meeting the bits on their checklist – fuck no. attraction just doesnt work like that. no one falls in love with the person that hit everything on their little “ideal type” checklist. honestly, if you asked me to describe my ideal type n i just listed shit off the top of my head, it probably wouldnt add up to namjoon…. but in every way namjoon perfect to me. im fucking whipped. this is the same. dont take their ideals to heart, dont feel like anything on you needs to change. you are exactly the way you need to be, and dont ever let some guys “ideal type” make you feel any less. n if anyone every tries to tell you that you’re failing to meet their beauty standards… fucking kick them. fcuk them seriously. dont let this shit effect your self confidence. gross comments like that dont deserve a thought in your head


Sebastian Stan x Reader

Summary: Reader gets a phone call from her best friend, Sebastian, who is drunk, and goes to his house to check on him

Word count: 1269

Warnings: Drinking, nothing more i guess

A/N: Sebastian is one of my first new-stage crushes (my first first-stage is john stamos)

Originally posted by bovaria

You got out from the cab and started to walk to your best friend’s house door. It was a raining night and the fact that you were all soaked would remind you of a romantic movie cliché if it wasn’t because you were worried. Sebastian had called you drunk and was babbling about something you didn’t quite get before he suddenly hung up, you got instantly tense and decided to go to his house and checked on him. You stepped outside the door and knocked twice. No one answered. You worried even more and took out the spare key you had. You opened the door, turned on the lights and looked around already inside. 

You walked through Seb’s house waiting to hear some kind of sign of him being there. You could feel your heart beating faster and faster as you started to panic even more than before. Suddenly, a sound that seemed to be a weep caught your ear. You walked to the source of the sound and you almost jumped after watching the scene that was in front of you. 

Keep reading

wanna chat? pt. 17

on ao3
| 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17

i said a bunch of things in the note on ao3 but its like. sooo long so yeah just check that out please and thanks ilysm 

(son of a gunn = adrien, the worst = alya, lol death = nino, its red = mari)

what is happening in this anymore


son of a gunn: NASA!!! PLANETS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!

son of a gun has changed their name to trappist


the worst: as adorable as it is to see u nerd out like the loser u are
sleep boi

trappist: WHO CAN SLEEP AT A TIME LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!

lol death: hello my dudes why are we yelling

trappist: NASA!!!!!!!!!

lol death: nice
the one good thing the americans gave us

Keep reading

Every Single Rupauls Drag Race Queen Ranked from 1 to 100 by David Mason
You will notice as thece list goes it runs from HARSH to KIND being that we go from people who are wasting our time and perhaps not living an honest fantasy but trying to be something they FEEL they’re SUPPOSED to be and talented artists who capture us as they reveal beautifully honest selves which bloom from their unconscious.
The Top 25 are ICONIC GOLD and are identities who hold their own amongst all the queens. They are APEX PREDATORS and each could arguably be made number one depending on each persons values. This is MY list and therefore it reflects my values and needs.
100. Phi Phi O’Hara Shes actually the worst for being a horrible person who cant figure out why shes terrible and thats the worst part. I actually BOOED her in public when I saw her. Is it wrong to not like someone just because they were born??? I think it probably is BUT I dont like Phi-Phi because when they showed her mom her mom was like 26 and I just thought YUCK, unplanned pregnancy is just TACKY and I wouldnt have to deal with you if your mom just had the balls to own her own body and be responsible and kind to the Earth and abort you but apparently the apple doesnt fall far from the (say this in Goldie Hawn from Overboard voice) “short, fat, slut" and you come from a long line of short selfish inconsiderate people. Phi-phi is the best case as to why Planned Parenthood should be next to every McDonalds.
99. Kenya Michaels : Oh god Im disturbed by her. She was like that little doll from Trilogy of terror. I found her strong sexual identity so uncomfortable as it was just too obviously a defense mechanism from being a tiny rapeable person from a third world territory. Thats AWFUL to say but Im sorry its just what I saw. I didnt find it funny or sexy. I found it awful and cringy. Its NOT a reason to not like a person but it is a reason as to why I dont want to see her on my tv bending over and WAGGING HER TWAT at me. I dont want to celebrate her complex attempt at molestation management, Im sorry. Lets hope this is me just projecting. I know this is too much for the SECOND entry but Im just saying what I felt. I wish shed read a book instead of just GOING WITH THE SEX THING.
98. Kandy Ho: What gross name, what a skank not even a good skank like Samantha Fox, just a shitty skank.
97. Phoenix: Who? I really have to speed through this list I have to go to the gym.
96. Madame LaQueer: Id put her at 99 but I feel bad for her. Im a nice person.
95. Alisa Summers: i have no idea who this person is
94. Penny Tration: Oh fuck you for that stupid name. Get the fuck outta here.
93.Vivienne Pinay: Why did she think she was pretty or passable or fishy or WHAT? All I saw was “Hi, Can I get the lunch special? I’ll have tai Iced tea with Rad Prik Chicken and coconut soup. Thank you.”
92. Venus D-Lite: Venus is who I think of when I think of queens that dont matter. I didnt even say that to be mean. She just is.
91. Jaidynn Diore Fierce: ??? oh she was the one I think should be named PEANUT.
90. Naysha Lopez: What plane of consciousness thought this person needed to be seen?
89. Sasha Belle: Awkward entry! Rip off Mugler Chimera dress. HERES A TIP PEOPLE, dont try and copy the most amazing well made dress in the world that cost 300k to make and 900 years of 900 year old Parisian couturiers to make. I PROMISE YOUR VERSION WONT BE AS GOOD. If youre going to copy something also make sure said reference has a TEENSY bit of wiggly room for either styling OR improvement. The Mugler Chimeira dress does NOT. Stop looking at it, you cant have it.
88. Akashia: Maybe the first person to fall on the runway??? I dont know? I dont remember her exactly
87. Rebecca Glasscock: I went shopping with Ru once at Saks and a sales girl came up and said “Rebecca works here now!” Ru went from Cafe au lait to FISHBELLY faster than she could mutter… “Rebecca is here?…….now?” thank god the girl was like “Not today”… Cocoa pallor regenerated, shopping recommenced. Rebecca must have been INSANE.
86. Honey Mahogany: Who and Why and whatever….
85. Derrick Barry: Nope.
84. Robbie Turner: I wish you were Tina Turner
83.Cynthia Lee Fontaine:The cowboy look was like a THANKSGIVING revelation that GRANPA IS A CROSS DRESSER?!?!
82. Darienne Lake: Dip into the cool water of Darienne Lake was the best thing about her and that was Rus doing so.. BYE and shes from like Rochester or some shit. YUCK mid/western New York is SKANK.
81. Ginger Minj: Just everything I don’t appreciate.
80. BeBe Zahara Benet: She won season one and I think the prize was 10k and it shoulda gone to Nina.
79. Bob the Drag Queen: After the extraordinarily beautiful Violet won. The audience of sheep were put off by their inability to relate to her because they just arent as good as her so the next season they wrote the season about having a “peoples princess” win and that why we have SHITTY BOB the person who shouldnt have ever been invited. Whats WORSE and MORE ANNOYING is the LATENT worship of Violet after they realized JUST HOW GOOD SHE WAS ONCE THEY SAW BOB and Im sitting here with my fists clenched screaming YOU IDIOTS THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT?!?!?! Bobs season was the worst.
78. Delta Work: Shes the drag queens drag queen. Shes too bitter for tv though. Same reason as to why Jackie Beat isnt on tv, too sour for tv, but thats ok. There is certainly somethig to have the cache of being the type of queen you have to go out to see. When she botched the comedy challenge I felt for her. I could really relate. She has the comic ability and you could just hear the inner dialogue of self sabotage running in her mind. It sucked. Thats one of my challenges too.
77. Thorgy Thor: Funny smart queen that I like. Tv isnt a format that suits her.
76. Sahara Davenport : A sweet soul.
75. Yara Sofia: Ick… The best example of LEARN TO EDIT. Her styling is THE GOOP SHOW. You know how some people just have BAD VIBES? I just dont want her around me. I dont see her vibes swirling in a direction I wanna head towards. I kinda hate dreads, Id lie and not say it to sound cool but there just unsavory to me. Patchouli.. thats what I smell when I see them in my minds eye.They just make me ask.. Why do you deliberately choose to be kinda not so clean? Its some romantic notion I don’t prescribe too. Im not earthy in that way. Im Earthy in a watermelons are fierce kinda way.
74. Kelly Mantle: This person is not Christine Baranski! Why are you telling me youre related to a baseball player like Im supposed to care?
73. Magnolia Crawford: ahahahahahahahahahah… that poor homosexual. He MIGHT be more disliked than phi-phi. THAT NOSE gets points.. it HAD to be a critique on nose contour right?! Does anyone ACTUALLY know her?! I feel like this might be some weird dare that a straight guy did and made it on the show. It was all so WEIRD?!
72. Jade. I really dont remember a damn thing but kinda thought she was a nice person maybe??? errr ummmm I just shrugged my shoulders to myself.
71. Lanaysha Sparks: She was quite lovely and even surprisingly talented on the craft contest but not knowing who Diana Ross is and your a drag queen is SATANISM. Poor bitch is from Puerto Rico, do you now Puerto Rico is twice as poor as the poorest state? That sucks.
70.Laila McQueen: Is this an OSBORNE CHILD?? Had she been on previous seasons she would have faired better. Seemed like a kid Id hire as an intern and could trust.
69. Serena ChaCha Oh my god Serena snook right by me?!?! AHAHAHAHAH Serena! Worst look of ALL TIME. how was SHE an art school student?! I cringed when she said that as Im an art school kiid and was like NO NO NOPE TAKE IT BACK CLOSE YOUR MOUTH! Serena was the victim of QUEEN ON QUEEN GANG BULLYING and what was worse is AMERICA BACKED THE GANG RAPE. It was like that scene in The Dark Crystal when the Skeksi looses the sword challenge and they all tear the clothes of him and banish him! Alyssa WENT IN on her….Coco even got a piece of Serena that day! Serena is lucky to be alive.
68. Jasmine Masters: Im disturbed by my own ability to impersonate Jasmine Masters. Its not THAT GOOD but its better than a 225lb Pollock should be able to do. Her Slinky worm routine makes me GIGGLE. She is ANGRY……BLACK RAGE which I kinda appreciate in a way. I get it. I have gay rage so why cant she have BLACK RAGE?!
67. Tempest DuJour awww tempest.. We all like Tempest. Kinda funny shes a costume design teacher though no? She gave my husband a shirt and my husband wore it for her all day in Provincetown because my husband is like the sweetest person ever. I mean people were like “TEMPEST DU JOUR?!” they practically SPIT on him and he still wore it and he tagged her in the photo and she didnt even regram lolololol My poor husband, I love him so much.
66. The Princess: I made a comment about the Princess’ look being shitty on Instagram once and all her fans went APESHIT. It was the two nastiest messages I ever deleted.
65. Monica Beverly Hillz I shoulda put her farther back. She was not so great.
64. Vivacious: Awwww the old battle axe of drag. I support her endaevor but her looks were so dated. I do however respect her respect for the art so…
63. Lashauwn Beyond: That name is so real. You can say she sucks but you can also say shes the spirit of drag taking you “up" so let her be.
62. Mrs. Kasha Davis: WOAH boy did she sneak by me?! She must have got here EARLY and just WAITED. She sucked so hard you kinda loved her for being honest. Kasha was like your olde gay neighbor whos taste level sucks but you respect her because she went through the AIDS crisis and is still smiling. Not even kidding.
61. BenDeLaCreme: I just did not like her.
60. Pandora Boxx: Oh god Pandora. Did you see that Unicorn video she made… bless this bitch.
59. Shangela Laquifa Wadley: Shangela was just cheap. Shangela is like the same taste level as like Paula Abdul, Mad Tv, Khols, a Sketchers Sneaker… I just never like what she does. I dont need it. Its poor person humor. Just because you say something LOUDLY doesnt make it more funny. ( as I type in CAPS)
58. Roxxxy Andrews: This poor bitch dug a damn hole… You know shes not likeable because she was shadey but she was more talented then anticipated in the creative challeges, and I thought she had nice skin. My husband HATES HER.
57. Kim Chi: One note. Refrigerator being pushed down a runway. I actually dont like her for not having the courage to be out to her parents. Its insulting to the rest of us. Buck up bitch, your mom already knows, shes known since you were 2. The fact you think she doesnt know is INSANE. Your non outness renders any talent moot.
56. Adore Delano: Thanks but Ive been to Hot Topic, NEXT.
55: Acid Betty: I don’t remember much about the 00S BUT I STILL REMEMBER THOSE WIGS.
54. Courtney Act: Ok sure, but wheres the interesting part???? Her finale dress that was like rainbow hologram acetate was cool and nobody even mentioned it.
53. Trixie Mattel: I tried so hard to be nice to her in Provincetown and she was a cunt. Why are you a cunt to someone being NICE to you?
52. Coco Montrese : I could say mean shit but I wont. shes worked long and hard and deserves a clap. Shes not even a cunt. shes out of touch but shes from another world. Respect your elders.
51. Dida Ritz: Talk about out of touch. Her weird self loathing “Im a white girl” routine turned me into Jasmine Masters?! Like EWWW NO, learn to love yourself BITCH. We all know she did one of the best lip synchs ever.
50. Stacy Layne Matthews: Wait shes NOT black?!??? She was from BACK SWAMP, that gets TREMENDOUS “SWAMP CRED” She was so fat her hormones were just like “WHATEVER.. theres simply "NOT ENOUGH of us to go around?! WE DONT KNOW WHERE TO GO.. What do you wanna be today??? When was the last time youve seen your genitals because are you SURE youre still a male?? We dont know and could use some DIRECTION?!” and I appreciate that. I like people who are just like IM WHATEVER. Not everyone has to be a male or a female you know.
49. Jade Jolie: Jade is surprisingly the fishiest queen in my opinion. I saw her at the premiere party before her season started and we honestly thought she might be BIOLOGICAL. This holds some cache in an art of trying to be a woman at least SOMEWHAT. She made the unfortunate mistake of becoming Alyssas ENEMY which at the time was ACTUALLY kinda necessary because if you remember when Alyssa first started she was not the Alyssa we know and love and was kinda of a cunt who needed to get CLOCKED. BACK ROLLS has now been mutters a million times by ME ALONE and lets be honest WERE ALL now VERY CONSCIOUS of our back rolls now. I even got COOL SCULPTING and yes it worked. It works if youre like semi normal with a slight love handle or backroll but not if you have a spare tire because then its just like removing a brick from a wall, and no it didnt hurt, but get it done in Florida because procedures are cheaper there. Florida is basically LAWLESS, they also gave me a VITAMIN DRIP as I did it. That is not legal in NYC.
Jade had horrible style and made what looked like NAZI MATRIX PORN but dont imagine that in a good sorta Night Porter chic Nazi way. Imagine it as a black vinyl raincoat that that greasy haired kid in high school who wasnt allowed to be a faggot because you already had that role and did it better so he sorta segued into FETISH GOTH would have and now imagine him filming himself masturbating with a NON APPLE iPhone to a Marilyn Mason poster… That was her porn.
48. Sonique: Sonique is responsible for one of the wisest self realizations to ever surface on RPDR to me. After getting the chop she said something along the lines of “Well I guess theres more to life than being better than everyone.” YUP. Stop competing, life isnt a competition. You do you and thats your challenge, forget about everyone elses storyline.
47. Mystique Summers Madison: DANGEROUS PERSON but such good TV. To me it seems Mystique has the kind of tongue that can only tell lies, which is sad because that means she thinks whatever the truth is is so terrible she has to come up with an alternative. Thats unfortunate. That said I dont want her in my home. If she lies to herself and others this means she feels she doesnt have to play by the rules and probably steals. Did I just imagine her a thief? Yes, I did. I imagined her at a party at my house slipping one of my Versace candy dishes in her pocket WITH THE SOUR PATCH KIDS STILL IN IT.
46. Gia Gunn: Gia to me really is the sorta line between the queens you care about and the queens you take the opportunity to go get a drink while they come on stage. I took my two assistants on that Drag Cruise as a present and I cant remember what exactly happened but somebodies sneakers were TEMPORARILY ABDUCTED and Gia was UNNFUCKED and SURLY ABOUT IT. Gia on the show was half gross and half awesome. I feel shed LIKE to be nice but has so much DEFENSIVE ANGER she can’t. Its a mistake as shed be much more successful if she got over that. She really feels herself despite having a wonky eye, really short legs, and likening herself to Talapia and aligning herself to TIM GUNN??? Your fashion references are from TV????!… OH GURL… NO!.… I like her though. Shes a talented performer. I feel like Gia is that friend you have thats sorta like a bad dog on leash. You have to be careful with them when around kind people but theyre also helpful because theyre more than eager to be the bad guy if someone is bugging you. We all have that friend and theyre kinda fierce.
45. Mariah. Mariah walked into the room first episode and I thought DAMN shes FIERCE… and then she never looked that good again. If I was just going by tv, which Im 98% going by shed be placed lower BUT I saw her on that drag cruise and her performance was PERFECT. It was CLASSIC DRAG but executed flawlessly and she was nice when we got stuck in the elevator with her. I feel like she thinks she has to be mean or fierce or whatever when shed actually be more well received if she was the person I saw on the cruise who was down to Earth and chill.
44. Milan: Milan is one of the few New York Queens that Ive ACTUALLY SEEN OUT. These other queens im always like NEW YORK? NEW YORK WHERE?!? Im a third generation new Yorker who has lived here 18 years on my own and Ive never seen most of these queens who claim to be from NYC. Milan is nice and a talented performer. I was never into her drag because shes real STAGE oriented and real JULIARD STYLE ( I dunno if she actually went there) and thats just not my interest but she at least TRIED.
43. Dax ExclamationPoint: I feel Dax sorta made a mistake pigeon holing herself as “Queen of the nerds”, as soon as someone claims identity of something on camera queens for some reason HATE IT. I imagine its some kind of projected self loathing as gays are trained to hate themselves. Like how dare YOU assert yourself as something, you CANT do that youre a faggot. I seriously think this is the unconscious voice in 98 percent of gay guys heads and its why so many are self sabotaging or drug addicts and why there is no such thing as a gay gay icon and even kinda why DRAG EXISTS AT ALL. We cant like ourselves because straight society taught us to hate ourselves so we put it all onto a fantastic woman. Dax seems like a nice person who doesnt have that insane person need to “win” and therefore really shouldnt have been on the show as she just got used as sacrifice for hungrier queens.
42. Kennedy Davenport: Wait did I already do Kennedy Davenport because I really didnt like her??? huh I guess I didnt. Well maybe my unconscious mind liked her more than my reptile ego did and she got placed higher than anticipated. How can you hate on a hard working talent who has a retarded sister she has to support?! Jesus christ give the bitch a tip and never do less than a FIVE when tipping queens people A DOLLAR IS THE SAME THING AS A QUARTER!
41. India Ferrah: Oh god I worry saying mean things about India because I dont want to hurt her feelings as worry that she TEETERS ON SANITY but she to me is what drag is WHEN I DONT LIKE DRAG. Her “combat contour” is brutalist to the point of being vulgar. To me her styling concept is PUT EVERYTHING YOU OWN ON NOW BECAUSE MAYBE WE NEED TO RUN OUT THE DOOR AFTERWARD. I mean its the 8 foot braid with a giant bow, and the top hat, and the body stocking, and the thigh high boot, and the breast plate, now a giant necklace to cover the edge of the fake boobs, now put a spider SUCKLING THE TIT of the breastplate, oh wait I have TWO BOOBS and I NEED ANOTHER SPIDER, now add a couple jewels to the eyes of the spider OH WAIT spiders have six eyes so add four more… now what about belts, I only have TWELVE….
40. Mimi Imfurst: OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?! She fucking CAPTURED India ferrah like some kind of MOUNTAIN TROLL?!?!? That was one of the most amazingly insane moments on TV ever! Then when Raven WENT IN on her in All Stars …omg I have that segment saved on my phone and just watch it when I need to feel “myself” again. Mimi on the cruise actually did the best read on the Michelle Visage roast. Shes smart but lets her inner voices get the best of her. We all have inner voices but I feel chubby people are chubby because the voices are louder. Im not even saying it to be a dick but it seems like with people who suffer from body issues LIKE ME the inner voices are so LOUD you can see them reacting to them on their face. Hang around me long enough and you’ll totally see this. This is called being a function insane person!
39. Morgan McMichaels: Ahhh the Morgan McMonkey! Did you know shes actually Scottish, like from Scotland? That didnt come off on the show. Ok Morgan to me is interesting because as a person Morgan is just not my kinda person, she even has a SUPERMAN TATTOO and you know how much I hate Superman as to me he is the OPPOSITE OF CREATIVITY and a HERO TO SHEEP but that does NOT discount her talents. Ive seen her perform live and shes VERY good. Do I want to hang with her NO, is she a solid talent YES. I met her once and she tried to tell me she doesnt eat pork because PIGS DONT HAVE KIDNEYS. She said this while chain smoking cigarettes and drinking heavily… hmmmm. I dont even know how to organize the judgements I have. All this said I feel if Morgan was your friend you could trust her and shed definitely not be afraid of taking a hit to defend you.
38. April Carrion: She is the best example of being chopped too soon. Shes very talented and pretty and makes her own looks and I respect her abilities. She had more to offer as Ive seen other looks of hers and they were good. Too much of a shrinking violet to survive a comepetition. Shes quite lovely Im surprised she hasnt got some rich old benefactor.
37. Nicole Paige Brooks Oh my fuckin god Nicole Paige Brooks?!?!? Nicole is so important as she is SO MANY THINGS. Nicole is the ESSENCE OF REGIONAL TALENT. She is THE small town coke head faggot drag queen WE ALL KNOW. My mom would have had her on PROBATION. The spirit that has possessed Nicoles body is an ancient spirit which haunts every rural gay bar! Remember how she had the hots for Raven and also had FRECH TIP TOENAILS?!…That BODY built EXCLUSIVELY by COCAINE. Ugh.. Ive never even seen Nicole but I know her sooo well. Nicole has that IVE BEEN TO PRISON and ALSO HAVE CHILDREN and ALSO HAVE A CLOSETED BLACK BOYFRIEND vibe that is SO PURE. Nicole is the queen who marches in the regional gay pride parade wearing flat sandals and a bikini and ACCEPTS TIPS while she does it! Nicole might also work at BEST BUY when “O.D” (out of drag). and when in drag theres also the worry that she might ACTUALLY O.D. Nicole is important.
36. Carmen Carrera: Ok Carmen is from Jersey where its NOT EASY to be a gay soul. Carmen once tried to tell me its ok that straight guys call you a faggot there because its not an isult its just what you are… EEEESSSSHKKK That is some HARDCORE Stockholm Syndrome. I could say more but its none of my damn business. Im not crazy about Carmen because I think shes made some choices based on where shes from but thats none of my damn business so I’ll shut the fuck up. To me Carmen is an example of an unfortunate situation. Ive had to deal with those hardened Jersey boys as a kid and as a tender gay boy its NOT A NICE THING and it would have been easier for me if I was just a girl too. Yes shes pretty, I wish her happiness. If I was raised where she was maybe I would have killed myself. In a way she sorta did I guess but also rebirthed herself.. maybe I need to give her more credit.
Im going to add this. Most of us have to deal with being a "faggot” in a straight world and deal with it however we choose. I for example fetishisize it as for me its a safe place thats at least exciting as its FIERCE to have your hot husband call you a faggot as he bangs your puss hole out. At least that way youre dealing with the anxiety in a safe place and its HOT its also a lot easier than getting a sex change, pretending it never happened, and siding with your abusers in an effort to make the best of a bad situation. Maybe Ive made the wrong choice, see instead of siding with them and changing my sex I went punk and just write horrible things about them on St Patricks day and work out a lot so I can intimidate them on the street. SIDENOTE I have NEVER had someone make an anti gay comment to me when they’re by themselves, have you ever noticed that? The comments are only made when youre out numbered… fuckin pussies.
35. Jiggly Caliente: Jiggly is real.
34. Victoria “Porkchop” Parker: Porkchop must be worshipped as she was sacrificed for all our sins.
32. Ivy Winters: Nobody ever put it together that Ivy Winters looks almost identical to Grace Jones AND Jean Kasem. That is POWERFUL MAGIC. Too bad she didnt know it either because if she channeled that spirit she could have won this thing so damn easy.
31. Pearl:
31. Tatiana: The day Tati steps away from low brow nineties references and learns to kick is the day Tati advances much farther. She NEVER uses her legs and her legs are AMAZING?! I wish she woulda had the self confidence to get tougher on Raven when Raven attacked her on her season because it was so clear that Raven was operating out of total jealousy being both have great beauty but for Tati it was effortless and for Raven its four hours of incredibly skilled painting. Tati was too green to have that wisdom. If she had it…ooooohhhhh it woulda been FUHEEEEIRCE!
30. Laganja Estranja: Oh god… I dont have the mental capacity at this point to go into the psyche of Laganja…Laganja is so important. Laganja is the litmus for bad faggotry because shes ACTUALLY TALENTED, shes got an amazing body, but OH GOD shes a nightmare. You can tell her parents felt guilty and coddled and spoiled their baby gay into a place where the only way she now knows how to operate is to be a needy indulged victim. Her comedy routine with the old people was a SURREALIST MASTER PIECE. Get off drugs laganja, they dont make you cool and needing the crutch of a vice does not a personality make.
29: Jinkx Monsoon: Does anyone else remember how bad she was at the beginning of her season??? She got the ONLY edit and they spun her into a storyline where theres was no way she could loose. Ive seen this storyline somewhere and it was called PRETTY IN PINK. They basically realized she both Molly Ringwalds character AND the Ducky character at the same time and spun a storyline for her to win because they hadnt a queen like her yet. She is talented, not my kinda talent but whatevs, to me shes the MACARONI ART of drag. She woulda been my friend first year of art school but then you have to change schools because you find out she has a crush thats a touch much on you and its weird because you thought you were just good friends.
28. Tyra Sanchez: In person I think Tyra might be the most beautiful of all the queens actually. You won’t believe this but its true, she’s a stunner. Too bad she just wants to be the best Beyonce, and not the best Tyra. Tyra, you be TYRA because Trinity K already does a waaaaaaaaay better Beyonce to be honest and youre actually so good on your own if you just owned YOURSELF youd be extraordinary. Its a shame she doesnt have the insight or desire to be HERSELF. Isnt that INSANE??? Its why nobody likes her, because SHE doesnt like her?!
27. Alexis Mateo: When you read her name do you also read it with a lisp? I do! Alexis is a sweet person whom I really appreciate and is also a victim of the pageant system. Pageant girls suffer from not fully grasping why the pageant system is bad. Ladies, we dont think YOU are bad, we think youre victims of a horrible oppressive system that wishes to put women into a structure of something like a DOG show. THIS IS DEGRADING NOT ONLY TO YOU BUT TO ALL FEMALES. It attempts to organize the female sex into ONE SINGULAR IDEAL based on the values of MEN and thats FUCKED UP. To organize females into ONE SINGULAR IDEAL is HORRIBLE and ROTTEN. It DEVALUES any ability that men might see as something THEY have to deal with and DENIES ABILITIES and STRENGTH to women creating an oppressive structure for females to operate in. Its GROSS, dont buy into it, its not cool!
26. Shannel: I know you dont agree but Shannel is important. Shannel wears VON DUTCH HATS. Shannels best friend is the WHISPERING FACE in the mirror that tells her to believe insane things. Shannel has THE BEST EYES of all contestants. Shannel belongs to a mentally ill race of people known as SHOW FOLK. Shannel thought JUGGLING while walking down the runway would be IMPRESSIVE. Shannel paid FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS for that garment and Shannel paid TOO MUCH. Shannel WAS NOT ELIMINATED… SHE CHOSE TO LEAVE!….. Shannel is important.
OK the TOP TWENTY FIVE IS SERIOUS BUSINESS. These are the APEX PREDATORS!!! Have you noticed as the list has gone on the comments have gone from VENOMOUS and PUNISHING to RESPECTFUL ACCOLADE and thats because as the list goes the talent increases and Im grateful that these people are inspiring, not wasting my time, and are championing values that need to be championed! When I typed this I just got so excited I moved my ENTIRE BODY on top of my little clear desk chair and Im sitting here typing like a GARGOYLE! Every single one of these queens are a WINNER and I mean that. Im not just saying this shit, each one of these queens is a SOLID ARCHETYPE and depending on your own values you could place most of them in the top five and have a SOLID ARGUMENT. This list however is MY opinion and MY VALUES so this is much more about ME than THEM of course. Honestly every single queen on this entire list is a talent and deserves respect for making the effort!… yes even Phi-phi. To be in the top twenty five however means you can STAND YOUR GROUND AND OWN YOUR OWN CROWN. Remember this is MY list. Youll understand reading this list I value creativity and HEIGHT more than anything. Being fishy doesnt count for much to me and if youre dumb and dishonest it aint gonna work out…. Here are THE MOST IMPORTANT QUEENS OF RUPAULS DRAG RACE!!!
25. Jessica Wild: AHAHAHAHAHAH HAHAH How the FUCK did Jessica Wild make the top list?! FUCK YES MISS JESSICA you MADE IT!! Ahahah this is WONDERFUl. I secretly admit I LOVE Jessica. Ill go so far to say shes almost like a KINDER EN ESPAñOL version of Alyssa! Jessica live is FUN and shes VERY KIND. I met her and she was a doll. Jessica is GOOD VIBES. I can totally hang with Jessy. Is she creative? NOPE. Is she Edgy? NOPE. Is she fierce… actually she kinda is???!. Shes a good person who you can tell HONESTLY LOVES DRAG and has fun doing it and THAT is why she made top 25! Shes a pure soul who enjoys what she does and that its the SPIRIT and HONESTY rarely found on EARTH!
24. Max: Max CLEARLY is really into Kristen Mcnemany. Max served us upper middle class white privilege. She was NOT bound by the oppressive low class moral standards of gender and sexuality! Max allowed herself to be flat chested and have GREY hair and this says IM WEALTHY AND EDUCATED ENOUGH NOT TO HAVE TO PLAY BY A MANS RULES AND BE A BIMBO YOU POOR PEOPLE?! Max was well read and Max is probably the most well travelled person in the semi mid west sorta shitty small to medium sized city in which I imagine she is from NEXT TO HER SISTER that was in THE PEACE CORPS (I imagine). I bet Max went to a college that was previously ONLY FOR GIRLS. Off the show Max really gave some fantastic editorial moments. I appreciated Max, she was refreshing.
23. Naomi Smalls: The Praying Mantis of drag! Naomis skeleton is the best of all the girls and thats why shes here. TALL and THIN is SO IMPORTANT. She actually was a nice person and very creative too. I don’t like how people discounted her, she was far more creative than most of these people.
22. Milk: Milk is kinda like Max but not as annoying as a person and more “boy aware”. Like I imagine sitting on train with Max might be tedious as her affectations are what got her chopped, and Milk though shes a touch WASPY for my tastes is actually cool and smart and you could share and laugh with her. Milk was MY club name in the 90s so thats interesting as were both tall white people I guess that name just gets handed to you. Milk is sorta the Sandra Bernhardt of RPDR to me but maybe its just the STRONG NOSE. I liked Milks Pinnochio A LOT but if I remember correctly she used the same wig or a pair of shoes a few times and that DOES get a deduction. She was REAL “I have a mom who went to college and shes tall and for my birthday she bought me an AFGHAN (the dog).” . SMART WHITE PEOPLE LIFE… basically everyone I went to college with.
21. Joslyn Fox: Jossy Fox is not trying to be anything she isnt and that is her refreshing appeal. Jossy shops at Tj Maxx and has lunch at Panera because she used to work there and still gets a discount because her fag hag never left despite making a lot of lateral moves that took her nowhere. If I had kids Id hire Jossy to babysit them. Jossy asked to have my husband visit her at her dining table on the drag cruise, BUT NOT ME.
20. Willam: I really should have put Willam at a higher ranking place simply because shes a class act and one of the only queens whos never asked for a discount and buys my clothes. She is the one queen who decided to play by her own rules which sorta bit her in the ass ALMOST, but shes also one of the only queens who has her own career outside of RPDR. I like Willam, shes distant and calculating, but so am I.
19. Ongina: Ongina is important because shes the first one to show that to be successful on the show its not about your elaborately constructed artifice that you might THINK is what makes people like you, but about the REAL YOU you fear to show others that is what makes people like you and this TEENY BEING had the balls to do it. Ongina is all about the live performance as shes a total charmer. She can dance in the palm of your hand and sleeps in a walnut shell at night. Her charm is her human connection that you dont get from most performers and you can’t really get from TV.
18. Manila Luzon: Manilla gives the best costumes in drag styling. Her puppet faces are great, but ONE TIME USE, so shes a little for the kiddies and straight people who only see her once and dont follow drag so thats why she isnt higher for me. Remember if youre top 25 youre iconic! Im just organizing MY VALUES here so its not about these queens abilities but more about MY PERSONAL AGENDA and how I would ORGANIZE WORLD VALUES should I be given the chance…. (echoing Skeletor laugh)
17. Latrice Royale: Latrice is the spirit of America. If you dont like Latrice YOU ARE ISIS. Watch her performance at the season finale where Violet wins, its sooo darn good. Id love to put her farther up but I cant because she only wears THE SAME PAIR OF SHOES with every look. Lady… lay out some coins stop “living poor”. The moment you spend the dough to move yourself forward YOU ACTUALLY MOVE FORWARD. Stop living in a world where you cant afford shoes, break out of that mindset where youre worried to spend a little cash because you might not have it. LIVE RICHLY…YOU CAN AFFORD SHOES. That said remember CREDIT IS NOT CASH BITCH, do NOT use a credit card pretend you have the fantasy of the security of wealth, but I KNOW you at least have 49.99 for a plus size pair of PLEASERS!
16. Katya. The first time I saw Katya I thought TOTAL FORMER COKE HEAD… and I was right. Thats not a read its just the vibes. I think shes very smart and funny and her finale “read ya” was the best of al of them BUT she got a TOTAL SWEETHEART EDIT BECAUSE ALASKA WAS SLAUGHTERING EVERYONE so they needed to make it seem at least a LITTLE like a competition (though detox was like on another level) but I REALLY dont like that FORCED self deprecation and FAKE NICE LAUGH she gives people ESPECIALLY Trixie.. Stop GIFTING her that reaction, we all see right through it! It comes off like less of a laugh and more of an APOLOGY for existing and you dont need to do it youre fierce, just stop. Before you get too big a head though I have to be a good person and let you know your finale look on All Stars was the THIRD worst look ever to go down the runway behind Serena and Cynthia. Don’t believe me???.. check out the hemline.
15 Jujubee: Out of all the queens I think if I had to spend an extended period of time with them Id choose Juju. Shes smart and funny and hopefully that would give me the opportunity to teach her about STYLING because she needs some help. Damn your looks are CHEAP woman. They sell Vogue at the GROCERY STORE!? Im not even asking for the far superior Italian Vogue, Im just saying SHITTY COMMERCIAL GROCERY STORE FASHION MAGAZINE VOGUE. Pick it up and then look at your clothes and figure out the difference. I actually think Juju might be the funniest queen even over Bianca. Shes certainly one of the smartest, and dont forget her library reading was really good.
14. Trinity K. Bonet: I imagine youre suprised at Trinity ranking so high up. Trinity is something I respect.. QUIET CONFIDENCE. Trinity was too damn well mannered to get as far as she should have in the competition and the reason why is Trinity K is the personality type I really respect who is someone who is QUIET and TALENTED. She lets her talents do the talking and unfortunately for good tv you cant just sit there and wait to slay on the runway, you have to have provide soundbytes and dramtic facial gestures for gifs etc. Trinity respectfully minded her own damn business and let her abilities do the talking and I REALLY like that. I went on that nightmarish drag cruise and hands down the best performance was Trinity it was about a ten minute Beyonce number and it was BETTER than Beyonce. It was FANTASTIC and im not even a Beyonce fan. I also think shes very beautiful and has a total Angela Basset quality to her which Im charmed by. Trinity was well mannered and polite and I kinda wanted to be her friend because someone like that benefits from someone like me who isnt afraid to maybe NOT be so polite should the rare occasion call for it. I guess Bianca kinda saw that too. I kinda think for some weird reason Im sweet on her because Tina Turner was my first concert at 8 years old, which I won the tickets to answering Tina Turner Triva on the radio, and that remeinds me of my mom who I went to the concert with and so therefor I want to protect this “good woman”.
13. Nina Flowers: Speaking of good women the next is Nina Flowers. I have NEVER heard ONE person say ONE bad thing about Nina and the multiple times Ive met her she is KIND AND LOVELY. Nina endured that entire CONFLAMA of SEASON 1 and DIDNT EVEN GET THE PALTRY 10k she deserved?! THEN Nina got CURSED with being paired with RAVING MAD WOMAN TAMMIE BROWN and ROLLED WITH IT without complaint. In fact if you watch All Stars 1 instead of complaining Nina handles her like a loving mother who has a RETARDED CHILD who YELLS A LOT. Speaking of YELLING RETARDED PEOPLE one time my husband and I were in Miami and we bought BAD PILLS (is there any other kind in Miami) and were TWACKED OUT ASSHOLES and ran into her and we COULD NOT SHUT THE FUCK UP and she was SO TOLERANT, AND SO NICE, AND SO UNBOTHERED that we almost wondered if we PASSED FOR SANE. Looking back WE DID NOT, Nina was just really nice. Nina is also a great Dj who really gets that CUNT FACTOR and makes for a great night out.
12 Miss Fame: Drag being an art form that relies so heavily on the magic of transformation being the best make up artist of all the queens certainly gets you TOP THREE placement. Too bad Miss Fame is the SECOND BEST MAKE UP ARTIST of Rupauls drag race. If this was a BIOLOGICAL female make-up challenge Fame would be the best, but DRAG MAKE UP is a VERY different art form. Fame had fantastic looks and a greatly appreciate her. I just wish the brains matched the visuals because theyre SO sharp. She really is the Linda of RPDR. Linda was my SECOND choice of the Supermodels, my first was Nadja so you can see where Im coming from. To me alien proportions and snowgress fantasies trump “classic fashion perfection”.
11. Chi Chi DeVayne : Chi Chi Devayne is THE SPIRIT OF DRAG. Chi chi is POOR AS FUCK and still managed to teach herself how to do BACKFLIPS IN HEELS. THERE IS NO REASON FOR ALL OF US NOT TO BE ABLE TO DO THE SAME BUT WE CANNOT! She is THE DRAG ASSASSIN. I respect her SO much. Imagine if she was given the same opportunities any of us in the North East of the United States were given?! When I was a little kid I wasnt rich either but I feel in North Eastern America you can receive a great education and you dont have to be wealthy at all. A good education is just kind of built into the psyche just like our PURITANICAL JUDGEMENT. I mean as a kid I grew up in a tiny single parent home next to a pond and it certainly wasnt GLAMOROUS but if I felt like it my 8 year old self could wander over to the neighbors house which was basically THE ADDAMS FAMILY MANSION to me which belonged to the professor who established the local community college and Id just sit there in his living room while he and his wife watched JULIA CHILD Id point at the random objects hed collected from around the world and ask “Whats that?!” and hed reply “That is a TURKISH BULLWHIP!” FIERCE?! ..with that information alone not only did I learn of exotic locations I never heard of I knew I TOO wanted to go there AND had the ability too. Something tells me being from Louisianna Chi Chi didnt have the opportunity to learn how to cook LONDON BROIL (I still remember Julia saying “Ooh this roast is SPITTING at me) while sitting in the dark at a baby grand piano while a Grandfather clock gonged in the background like these people did. It would be VERY EASY to be an angry bitter person coming from her situation and instead Chi Chi took it upon herself to excel to the best of her abilities and BOY HAS SHE. I feel Chi Chi was THE BEST when it came to Lipsynch for your life. All she needs is 12 months, a handful of those McDonalds gift certificates you got at Halloween, a stack of VHS tapes of STYLE with ELSA KLENSCH, 6 National Geographic magazines, and everyone dies. Chi Chi is FIERCE.
10 Chad Michaels: Being the number one Cher impersonator in the world gets you top ten placement forever. Its not debatable its DRAG LAW.
9.Tammie Brown: Tammie Brown is an UNCONTROLLABLE FORCE OF NATURE. Tammy is the SWIRLING POWER OF CHAOS. GRAVITY DECIDES TO LEAVE WHEN TAMMIE IS AROUND! Tammies superpower is that she holds no power unto her own but EVERYONE ELSES POWERS ARE RENDERED USELESS WHEN SHE WALKS IN THE ROOM. NO QUEEN has any power over Tammie and for THAT ALONE she gets top ten placement. Have you ever seen those crazy cat videos of cats reacting to people who throw a cucumber on the ground? If you havent, check them out, but in a nut shell cats are for some reason TOTALLY FREAKED OUT by a cucumber sitting on the ground. They go from acting relatively sane to COMPLETELY BIZARRE at the toss of a cucumber… well TAMMY IS THAT CUCUMBER.
8. Bianca Del Rio: Bianca is a hard working professional and a talent and Im glad we have her on “our” side as I cant think of any straight comedian who could beat her in a “read off”. She doesnt particularly check any of my boxes as what she is Im not super into but you cant deny her abilities. Shes the sharpest tack. My friend Bradford hired her for a dinner and it was fine and fun and all and as she was walking out the door my NUMB NUT husband brings up “but what about the movie youre making?” this of course lead her to go on about how shes raising money etc so then BRADFORD THE ASSHOLE makes everyone say how much theyre going to donate to her film putting me on the spot to donate 500 dollars to the fucking crappy movie?! It was well shot but UGH LADY wheres the funny? I paid FIVE HUNDRED GOD DAMN DOLLARS FOR THAT MOVIE?!?! FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS….. FUCK…. thats TWO tickets to see CHER?!?!?!?
7.Sharon Needles: When Sharon first came out I BOUGHT IT, literally, I bought the t shirt which was secrelty packed as a GLITTER BOMB.. FUCKING CUNT…She really gave us hope and spoke to so many and was a creative and funny star. Shes a great talent who has done some amazing looks. Unfortunately shes become super sour and nasty and nobody wants to work with her and former fans are made uncomfortable to be around her. Sharon Needles is THE BEST DRAG QUEEN nobody wants to be around.
6. Violet Chachki: Im pretty sure Violet was trained by a SITH LORD or something. Shes CURIOUSLY YOUNG to be so professional and SO on point and just soooo good. God I hated the idiot RPDR fan base who talked shit about her simply because they couldnt relate to her because she was confident in her abilities. A wolf does NOT consult the sheep as to what to have for dinner!?! Im sorry but thats NOT something to make apologies for and its CERTAINLY not something you need to change. Nobody should have to dumb themselves down for the masses and Violet has not. She consistently DOMINATES THEM with her BITCH GODDESS self and Im SOOOO THANKFUL FOR THAT. This icy goddess holds the title for the number one AND number two AND number three best gowns on RPDR history. Dont go against Violet you WILL loose.
5. Alaska: Alaska broke all the rules by being HER OWN CREATURE. You cant pin down Alaska as one specific thing. Shes is an entity unto her own and that is so important to recognize. Shes also maybe the smartest queen of all of them. Her drag is a critique of drag itself which makes her a more evolved creature compared to “lesser” queens. Like all these top five shes really carved out PERSONALITY in her drag persona. Shes maybe made me laugh more than any other queen.The only “negative” I can think of is I dont like her interest in nails, seems like something India Ferra would be into. Its sorta weird that she named herself Alaska when the biggest gay icon in Spain and many other Spanish speaking nations is Alaska but shes from Pittsburg, not Madrid.
4. Alyssa Edwards: Oh fuck is Alyssa Edwards important! The DON KNOTSS of Drag Alyssa is sorta just like Texas from which she hails… BIG AND WEIRD THINKING AND despite being the essence of AMERICA its also ITS OWN ENTITY and by its own design is flawless and also VERY FLAWED! Remember when ALyssa first started and she was mean and people did not like her?! This is important to recognize because Alyssa HOOKED US with a very special chemistry of herself as a real person and this SWIRLY KOOKOO TOWN that her psyche exists in where shes the MAYOR, THE RICHEST LADY, THE NOSEY NEIGHBOR, AND THE BEAUTY QUEEN! Shes all those things and we get to see them all exist in every gesture. The gif of her negotiating a sip on an extra long straw was just as responsible for us falling in love with her as was her UNSELFAWARNESS (is that a word?) upon the HARD REVEAL of her BACKROLLS. Those lips and eyes are insanely MAGNETIC but all of it would be only half as magnetic if we didnt know what a LOOSEY GOOSEY she is?! You KNOW that Alyssa PERFORMS FOR NOBODY when shes by herself…. OFTEN.
Alyssa I think is the only queen Ive ever hired and she got out of a cab by herself in FULL DRAG wearing like a TEDDY and a SHEER DRESSING GOWN and walked down the street in broad daylight asking my assistant if the MEXICAN RESTAURANT ON THE CORNER was where she was PERFORMING?!?! Alyssas personal styling is: “Dress, not particularly expensive shoe, AND PIECE OF THING ON HER HEAD- but NOT a complete thing on her head just a PART of something on her head! Its the VAGUE ALLUSION that this is part of MAYBE SOMETHING GREATER, or maybe shes been to SPAIN, or maybe she shoplifts at CLAIRES BOUTIQUE?!
Alyssa is an America treasure!
3. Raven: Raven is JEALOUS BEAUTY. RAVEN IS EVERY FIERCE VILLAINESS THAT EVER EXISTED. Raven VERY EASILY could be my number one BUT IM LEARNING TO LOVE MYSELF and Im not going to SIT HERE and WAIT to be loved by someone I adore as they DENY MY EXISTENCE simply because THEY THEMSELVES are incapable of being loved. I already DID THAT SHOW its called ME AND MY DAD and thanks but over a lifetime as a child I sat there on the couch waiting for him to show up, which he often DID NOT, as I hoped that MAGICALLY ONE DAY this person you adore is suddenly going to take interest in you. GUESS WHAT… IT AINT GONNA HAPPEN!!! I might love Raven but RAVEN CANT LOVE BACK and instead of being MAD (like I was for a lifetime with my own dad) Im going to recognize that I dont hate this person at all, in fact this VILLAIN is a HERO to me and though I wish theyd be capable of liking me back theyre NOT and THATS OK. Im not the bad guy for that, and neither is Raven, and neither is my dad. Its something they cant do and MAYBE someday they will and if so THATS GREAT but until then Im gonna love myself and put interest in people who reciprocate my feelings.This all may sound like I had some kind of ACTUAL relationsship with Raven WHICH I HAVE NOT but Ravens entire DRAG CONCEPT HER VERY DRAG BEING is that story line to me. The even more twisted part is we love Raven BECAUSE shes cruel?!?! I think shes TREMENDOUS! Raven is THE EVIL QUEEN from Snow White, shes Alexis from Dynasty, shes Katra from She-ra. Raven IS jealous beauty. Raven is a cruel and powerful goddess and I LIVE for her. We have tried SO MANY times to hire her and it falls on dead ears. Shes cannot be bothered. She needs to GET BOTHERED because the reason why shes not an All Star is because she cant be. I mean I think its really because shes had a couple DUIs and theres no way a liquor company was gonna give 100k to a person who has 2 DUIS but you know what I mean….
Raven is also THE BEST DRAG MAKEUP ARTIST. All these future queens stand on Ravens trompe l’oeil bone structure. Ravens one word comments on fashion photo Ruview make me HOWL. Ravens astute observations are as sharp as her nose contour. Raven has the teeniest room for evolution spiritually I think JUST A TEENY BIT, like DONT CHANGE, but MAYBE get a LITTLE kind and Raven will be my number one and OH GOD I want her to be number one SO BAD.
2. Raja. Ok, now Im back to sitting on my tiny clear desk chair like a Gargoyle because its THE TWO MOST IMPORTANT QUEENS?!!?!? VERY SIMPLY without Raja Rupauls Drag Race would be MEXICAN TELEVISION! The show would be an FAR less elevated and be a GOOPEY SUNDAE of WIGS AND BOOBS AND WELL WORN DRESSES THAT SMELL LIKE B.O and ANGEL! Raja brings in references that lift the entire competition UP. Alyssa is Cosmopolitan but Raja is ITALIAN VOGUE AND NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC. Shes still the best runway walker of all the queens which is like MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANYTHING. In her single season she gave us gold robot, amazon tribes person, Marie Antoinette, and when she walked in first episode it was the most obvious time someone was CLEARLY the winner from MINUTE ONE.
Raja is the PUBLIC TELEVISION OF DRAG RACE! A FUNDAMENTAL NECESSITY to the CLASS LEVEL of Rupauls Drag Race and without her the floor would drop out. LETS IMAGINE AN AFRICAN WATERING HOLE with baboons squeeling, zebras making their weirdo sounds that you would never expect to come from a horse, hippos eating, hyenas laughing and all of a sudden the GIRAFFE enters the scene and everyone SHUTS UP AND STARES… Well RAJA IS THAT GIRAFFE… and yes Shangela and Yarra Sofia are the babbons. We need LESS BABOONS and MORE GIRAFFES. If I HAD to make a negative critque Id say Id just like to see LESS POT and WINE references on her facebook page because when I read that I think she might be mildly depressed and I dont want that from this creative talent whom I adore!
1. Detox. DETOX IS CHARISMA. Detox IS the MUGLER woman. Thierry Mugler is what saved me in college. Mugler is clearly what has saved Detox as well. The first time I saw Thierry Muglers work was at a newsstand in VALENCIA CALIFORNIA at CalArts and his robot suit was on the cover of STERN magazine and I grabbed it, and some suburban TWAT MOM shot me side eye because the robot suit shows nipple and of course she disapproved that because she was JUDGEY UNTRAVELED TRASH. I looked inside at his work and I thought I WANT TO BE WHERE THESE PEOPLE EXIST?!?!? I actually brought the magazine to my mentor and said “I NEED TO BE HERE.” Well Detox takes me to that place! I can relate to Detox. Were really similar in many ways, both of us have tried to manefest that Mugler construct as best as possible and through ANY means necessary. If Raven is the Evil Queen from Disneys Snow White, Detox is Maleficent! Both are SO MAJOR how do you pick?! Well I will tell you how! Remember how in my Raven rant I was saying I was going to learn to love myself well putting Detox first is learning to love myself! Why?! Because Detox is the EVIL QUEEN who MAKES GOOD. When Alvaro offered to pay both Detox and Raven to send me a little happy 40th birthday message Raven didnt respond, and DETOX DID and REFUSED TO TAKE MONEY. You know when Skeletor feels the spirit of Christmas in the Heman Christmas special?? Well SKELETOR DETOX. Shes the VILLAIN we all love with A HEART thats open to be loved. Detox is the DAD WHO SHOWS UP.
Detox takes great measures to embody the values that mean so much to me. Its actually HARD to be this GOOD. She is SOFT AS NAILS but you still wanna FUCK HER?! She had TREMENDOUS sex appeal without being soft, amazing style without being trend driven, and shes a bitch goddess without being bitter. Detox is number one, Detox is the good mommy.

@the anon who has been sending @d–oki all these messages about me ‘reblogging my own caps’, let me make one thing clear. Never in my life have I reblogged anything of mine. I would’ve ended this here but you apparently sent two messages to her (this and this) and it pisses me off so fucking much to see this. it’s embarrassing and humiliating, and it’s hurting my pride and I’m unfortunately a very prideful person. I don’t care if I sound like an asshole rn, cuz I am and Im going to stick up for myself before anyone actually misinterprets this. plus im glad Lyric is so understanding and she handled it so well so screw you for trying to tarnish my name because I’ve got wonderful people around me, and everything she said was so genuine and true and there is no reason for me to write this post except for the fact that I am a disgustingly prideful being and I do not like the idea of being mistaken.

Keep reading

so after the, Discourse, i figured i might as well make this post on how to write good autistic characters for voltron fans, or any other fans for that matter, should they want to include an autistic character within fics (which you totally should btw, youve got no idea how much positive representation can do)

before you read this, bare in mind that i am One (1) autistic person, i cant talk for every single autistic person’s experiences, but i have more authority on this than allistics. so im going to putting down the basics and then if any other autistic people want to add onto this please do!

so: the ground rules for writing an autistic character

1) do not use an autistic character for shock

this is probably one of the most annoying things. you do not write in an autistic character “””coming out””” about their autism at the dinner table and having everyone go silent in the shock of it. in reality you shouldnt have to point neon signs which say “AUTISTIC!!!! OH GOSH!!!!!!!” at a character. a super good example of not needing to do this is keith! its never been verbalised that hes autistic, he didnt sit everyone down and say “guys………. i cant neurotypical  up……………….. because im not neurotypical………………………………” 

but so many people hc him as autistic! this is because his character is clearly autistic without him needing to wear a name tag saying it, and your character shouldnt need a name tag either

2) dont make autism look like something weird

this ones super important dog. youve probably walked past thousands, THOUSANDS of autistic people in your life but i can promise that you didnt point and gawk at them: because autism isnt something weird that you can pick out in a crowd. if your entire character is “hey! this is grunglesnut! hes autistic because he loves trains so much that he paints murals of them and has slips of paper with thomas the tank engine on stapled to his wall!” thats not a good character. grundlesnut can love trains without you pointing and laughing at him for it and making it sound like some creepy obsession

3) dont make autism something to feel sorry for

we are not neurotypical pity porn. what do i mean? sit down and read what you just wrote where people find out that your character is autistic.

did you make autism sound bad? 

did you make your character telling another that they are autistic about understanding one another and working to make life a bit easier for the autistic person, or did you make it sound like it was a terrible affliction? did you make autism sound like part of the person, or did you make it sound like something which makes life for their family harder?

autism is not a bad thing, in fact even if it can make life harder i love my autism because its part of who i am. i dont want to read a story where a character is on the verge of tears because they just found out that their friend has autism and now life is going to be “harder” for both of them.

4) dont just shove an autistic character in for brownie points

listen to me carefully when i say this. you might think that by putting an autistic character into your story youre being great! super cool! youre being inclusive! but bare in mind that bad representation is just as bad as no representation, if anything its worse tbh

the main thing im talking about with this is people creating ocs which are autistic specifically for a fic. this is, yes, a bit of a mine field. but im gonna give you three useful pointers to get started:

a) first impressions are everything

b) it doesnt matter how much you go into the character in later chapters, first impressions are everything

c) im not fucking joking, dont even try to lie to me and say that you dont judge people based off first impressions, First Impressions Are Everything

i dont want to read a fic that has an original character as a family member with the third line that character saying being “im autistic”, because thats not what would happen with a majority of autistic people! yes there are autistic people who are a bit more comfortable with talking to new people, but dog im 17 yrs old and i still cant talk to a majority of my family at christmas reuinion dinners, let alone tell them i have autism

heres what you do: look at the characters youre writing about. for example klance: so, SO many people already see keith as autistic. there are posts about autistic keith which actually have thousands of notes. and those arent coming out of nowhere: how keith acts in canon is what makes so many people see him as autistic. why dont you write a fic with keith in it where keith is autistic! you dont have to change how he acts, you dont have to change what he does, because hes already autistic dude!!

5) listen to what autistic people have to say

look, i dont care how many autistic brothers you have, unless you have autism yourself you need to ask about it. dont just google symptoms and look at a list and pick out what you want to use: ask autistic people how they feel about a character.

“but that will take ages!” well then dont write the character in

“but i plan to go into more detail in later chapters!” dude i will tell u first impressions are everything until the day i die

“but if i educate myself wont that be ok?” you could argue this: if you want a mediocre fic. if you arent autistic, it does not matter how much you read up on it, you dont know the first thing about living with autism. because to understand living with autism you actually have to live with autism. listen to what people are telling you: and i would recommend talking to multiple people since autism isnt black and white. it changes for everyone dude.

but, as i said, i am just one autistic person. if any other autistic people want to add onto this then please do, but understand that if you are allistic this is your time to listen to what we;re saying. im not doing this to flash my nd card and make everyone think im cool, im doing this so that we can avoid more,,,,, “Drama” in the future. its not hard to write a good autistic character: its hard to choke down your pride and ask how

Ok but I keep thinking about like this a/b/o au where Crowley heads a dangerous cabal of people involved in anything from embezzlement to intimidation to murder. In exchange for protection for his and Zachariah’s company, Michael allowed Crowley to take his brother Castiel for “mating”, which they all knew meant “live-in fuck toy” but decided to ignore because Cas is an omega, he’s less than his Alpha and Beta siblings and most importantly, he’s a pawn to be used.
And at least Crowley didnt bite him, didnt officially make him his mate so he’s not bound to him, but the second Cas finds out he’s pregnant, something changes in his complacency to Crowley, and he immediately starts planning his escape. He wont let his child suffer through the trauma of living in Crowley’s power, or worse, risking his Aunt Naomi taking the child to groom him into another pawn in her and Zachariah’s twisted social climb. Especially if the pup presents as Omega.
So he sneaks into the computer at night, looking for cheap houses anywhere to rent, in small minuscule towns because they’re harder to find him in and Crowley will expect him to run to big cities where he’s got distant family in New York and Chicago. He swipes one of Michael’s bank cards and takes out $15000, grabs an old pickup truck from the company garage that no one will notice is missing (but he stills screws off the plates when he’s an hour out of LA), and bolts.
And then 2, 3 months pregnant omega!cas moving into a Alpha!dean’s small town in Lawrence, quiet, unannounced, and barely noticed. But Dean’s driving home from his mechanic’s shop with the windows rolled down because it’s July and 92 degrees out. He smells vulnerable pregnant omega cut through the air from the open window and slows down until he sees Cas, stooped in the small truck trying to pick up a box and get it in the house without putting the wrong amount of pressure on the tiny pup growing inside him. And dean can’t help himself because it’s hot as balls, the guy is pregnant, and he can’t smell anyone else’s scent around the truck so he’s definitely alone lifting heavy boxes and that’s so not good for a pregnant person.
Except dean doesn’t expect to see the absolutely terrified look in Cas’s eyes when an unfamiliar alpha gets too close to him and his pup, and suddenly he feels like he knows why Cas is pregnant and alone and quietly moving into a small town in Nowhere, Kansas. Cas of course, is terrified that Dean is an Alpha sent by Crowley to find him and bring the omega back to the abusive Alpha to whom his brother Michael basically sold him to.
So Dean backs up and slowly introduces himself, asks if he can help because he really shouldnt be doing heavy lifting in his condition, and its only a few boxes anyway. Cas is wary, but he doesnt smell anything unpleasant about dean under the layers of oil and grease and faint metallic smell that comes from spending hours fixing cars, so he lets dean carry the boxes into the house, just past the door. He doesnt tell dean his name, but Dean pointedly doesnt ask anything of Cas except how he’s feeling and if he’s in any pain. He refers Cas to Ellen, who’s got a pregnancy and pediatrics practice 10 minutes away, makes small talk about where to eat and get cheap groceries, offers to fix up the truck and tells him where Cas can find him most days, at work or at home seven blocks away. Cas only mutters a few short responses and
Dean doesnt see Cas again for almost two weeks, but worry and concern and something else compels him to drive by Cas’ house everyday and glance over to make sure everything looks okay. Then Cas shows up at the shop, looking down at his feet like a small child who’s been told to be seen and not heard, and asks if Dean can take a look at the truck, because its making weird noises.
And from there Dean slowly starts to wiggle his way into Cas’ life, dropping by the house to compulsively check on the truck, starts running through the park because he learns Cas like to read under the trees, shows up at Ellen’s office to bring by lunch more often since Cas got a job as a receptionist there. Cas starts to open up around Dean, starts laughing at his jokes and even letting it slip that Ellen thinks he could be a good medical assistant with the way he interacts with the omegas and kids that come into the office.
Dean’s obviously protective of Cas and the pup growing in his belly, always asks Cas how he feels and if he needs anything. Cas is 7 months pregnant when Dean finally asks Cas out on a date, no pressure, something casual like a movie. Cas says he’ll think about it, and then suddenly Cas calls out of work 3 days in a row, and Ellen gets worried and asks Dean to make sure Cas is ok. Cas doesnt answer the door, but Dean’s worried as shit that somethings wrong with Cas or the baby and he /technically/ breaks into the house but hes got a reason so it doesnt count.
But while Cas does have a little bit of a cold, he’s mostly wallowing in his bed, pregnant and anxious and hormonally and emotionally exhausted, and he finally tells Dean his story. Because he doesnt want to be someone else’s pretty little omega even though he knows Dean isnt Crowley or Michael or Zachariah and he knows Dean is a good person and Alpha and he wants to be with Dean more then anything but he doesnt want to go back to being less than a person.
And Dean just wraps him up in his arms and mutters nonsense into his ear until Cas calms down and promises that he’ll respect whatever Cas wants to do and wont go faster than what makes Cas comfortable and Cas nods, dried tears on his face, and asks if Dean would stay with him. Dean smiles and makes grilled cheeses for them and he lays in bed with Cas and they watch ridiculous reality TV until Cas is sleepily slumping onto Dean’s shoulder and Dean is yelling at every stupid person on the screen. And as he’s slowly drifting off while Dean rubs against the crick in his back, making sure not to put a possessive hand on Cas’ belly so he wont feel threatened, and the last thing Dean hears Cas say before he starts snoring softly is “this isnt the worst first date I’ve been on”, and Dean cant help but laugh, jostling Cas on his shoulder.
They go quickly from there, kissing a week later, sloppy and rushed handjobs within the month. When Cas enters his last month of pregnancy, he’s stuck in this constant seesaw between whole-body discomfort and horny like he’s in heat and unable to do anything about it since he’s officially too big for any kind of “strenuous activity”, and Dean just thinks he’s downright adorable when he pouts in his bed that he’s too big to do anything, especially after Ellen demands that she had better not see him for the next three months unless he’s coming in as a patient.
So they patiently wait until Cas bravely makes it through 32 hours of labor and baby Emma is born, and shes the most beautiful tiny little creature Deans ever seen, and he wants her to be his. As Cas doses off to sleep with the infant nursing at his chest, he mumbles over to Dean “as soon as I stop feeling like I got run over by an 18-wheeler, I’m gonna bite you, and you better bite me back.” and Dean just smiles and kisses Cas’ forehead and says “whatever you want baby,” and holds Emma in his arms after Cas falls asleep and she’s done nursing and just stares at the two perfect people who he loves so much.


ALSO how do I link people in posts, if anyone wants to give me a quick lesson????

Fat Acceptance Rant

I am so fucking sick of hearing about fat acceptance. I have the hugest rant prepared. First, I wanna start this rant off by saying I am entitled to my own opinion and nothing can change my opinion on this matter, so there’s no use trying to argue with me! I have been chubby ALMOST my whole life. I was skinny as a kid, mom would always brag to her friends about it! I ballooned up around 4th grade, I was still active then but I ate terribly and I had a really young mom that honestly didnt know what she was doing with herself let alone her child. I played basketball, ran track, played soccer, and did karate. 4 sports, I still gained weight because I ate like absolute shit. I remember when I was in 5th grade I was 5'4" and 135 and I wanted to be 120. My mom was so anti-fat, but so uneducated so she spent the next 6 years of my life calling me everyname under the book, physically abusing me because I kept gaining weight/was a snot/didn’t do my chores. I wont go into detail but I definitely have severe PTSD from the things she did to me. For example, she once poured dirty cat litter on me, then filmed me crying while telling me I sound like a whale in distress. I kept gaining weight of course, I stopped doing sports not because I didnt want to but because my mom got pregnant and someone had to take care of her. I was 14 when she had my little brother, but it looked as if I had had him with all the weight I had gained. In 8th grade, I was 5'8" 185 lbs. I was NOT happy, but food gave me an escape for a little bit and I truly did have an eating disorder. I binged at first, thousands of calories sometimes even tens of thousands. Mom would beat me for eating the food but I didnt stop, Mom kept calling me everything under the book. She gained 100 pounds after getting pregnant and lost it all within a year. She got depressed, and left my brother and I alone for sometimes months. I got into drugs and ended up dropping out of school and choosing to go to military school. I wanted to improve, for my brother- who I had gotten awfully close to all those years mom was out being crazy. In military school, mom finally had to take responsibility for her son and I was gone for 6 months, I did workout in military school but we were required heavy duty meals because they didn’t wanna get sued for underfeeding us. I gained muscle, yes, I was able to do 7 pull ups at the end of my time there but I was still 225 pounds, and not even close to being healthy. I am telling you all this about my past  because I see countless excuses in the fat acceptance tag. I gained all my weight back in high school, every year making a plan that this would be the year! I’m gonna lose the weight! I even got my best friend to lose 50 pounds but I stayed the same. I’ve used every excuse in the book. In the beginning of THIS year, I started discovering body acceptace/fat acceptance/etc I was into it at first, because I wanted to truly believe myself when I said “Wow, I wanna love my body teehhee (: My body is great!!!” It felt good, getting all that attention, at first. There were even some cute creepy guys that wanted to see my fat rolls and my big thighs. Finally I was getting love from people I never got when I was younger, via the internet. Then I started going on 4chan.. I found myself in the /fit/ section everyday. I ditched tumblr, I was obsessed. I saw Fat Hate Threads/Fat People Stories and I would binge while reading through them. Laughing at fat people, even though I was one. I kept thinking “man, I need to make a change this shit isnt healthy” but I would do something for a week and go back to my old ways. I finally found the subreddit that changed/SAVED my life. It’s called r/fatpeoplehate. You get banned for being fat, so I never dared post a comment or a link or argue or do anything but lurk. I had been on tumblr so long I was convinced every boy secretly loved fat girls so I didnt have to change, I just had to find me one that didn’t care about being in public with a fat girl. This subreddit opened my eyes, not only is fat acceptance BULLSHIT but so is being fat. They hate all fat people on that sub and they have the right to. I think all fit humans have a buried hate for fat people but they have been raised that it’s impolite to say something out loud about it. I believe they have every right. I am still fat as fuck, yes I have changed my lifestyle greatly but until I am fit I wont be talking about that because I’m not looking for someone to get their hopes up in me finally losing weight and getting healthy. I dont want anyone to be happy for me, I need more people around that won’t congratulate me when I lose weight I need more people around that will be like “OK but you shouldnt have let yourself get that bad in the first place, we aren’t here to give you a gold star youre literally just going from a gelatinous blob to a human being shut the hell up.” and I’ve found that in fatpeoplehate. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t love your body.. I’m saying love your body by making sure you are healthy. If your bmi is over 30 and you’re not a body builder or some sort of athlete you’re not healthy. I dont care what your excuses are being fat isnt healthy.. it will never be healthy. You are cutting 30 years off your life, you are creating health problems for your future everytime you preach about HAES. If you have kids, and you put your habits onto them youre creating a shortened life for them. I know what it’s like to be fat. I’ve been through all the excuses you’re giving the world. I have fat ass grandparents and a chubby family besides my mom, I still don’t blame being fat on genetics. I told you all about how my mom used to beat me for being fat, because I want you to know no matter how shitty your upbringing was, no matter WHAT happened to you as a kid or what’s happening to you now you dont need to eat your feelings or eat because of your PTSD or BPD or whatever disease you’ve diagnosed yourself with. What my mom did was wrong, but I dont blame my current weight on my past. I blame it on lack of discipline. I thought I had PCOS for the longest time, guess what? It turns out I’m just fat. Every excuse you’re using is wrong, you cannot be healthy at every size. If you are obese, or even overweight you need to improve your eating habits and exercise. You have one fucking life, look deep down inside yourself- do you really want to be fat forever? You can lie to yourself all you want but I know you dont want to be fat, I know you don’t really think all these amazing things about yourself. I know because I tried so hard to convince everyone I was cute. The constant narcissism in the fat acceptance tags.. People that truly believe they are beautiful and healthy do not have to scream about it every time someone tells them they are wrong. This was a really poorly written rant but I needed to get it out. Fat shaming and Fat hate saved my life and my future children’s lives. It seems wrong to promote hatred, but if you’re doing it for HEALTH reasons, I feel it’s justified. Obesity isnt attractive, our bodies aren’t meant to be that size and if your'e wondering why these people on the internet are so attracted to you but real life guys arent? It’s because fat girls/guys are never going to be seen as attractive. Even fat people with pretty faces (Adele, Queen Latifah) are seen as /pretty/ but would be seen as more attractive if they looked healthy. People on the internet calling you attractive are most definitely fetishists or people that are so desperate and alone they crave any sort of attention. That’s all I have to say/ Fat acceptance is wrong and you’re slowly killing yourself. No excuses, stop eating so much and start exercising more. If you have problems with your metabolism, exercise harder and eat even healthier. You will lose weight, you will be healthy. 

anonymous asked:

Hello!~ Can you write about draco and his pureblood slytherin gf who lived in the muggle world as a kid living in the muggle world and his gf is teaching him the muggle way of life? Can you make it fluffy please? Thank you! (Sorry for my English >.<)

Title: Muggles?
Warnings: kissing, light smut, fluff
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 1657
(Y/f/m/s) - your favorite morning snack (coffee, pastry etc)
(Y/f/s) - your favorite snack (chips, pastry, veggies)

I hope you like this! If you don’t I’ll write another one…but I’m pretty happy with how it turned out. Sorry I haven’t been posting lately, I promise I will be. And don’t forget to send requests!
-s △⃒⃘ ⚯͛

“What exactly are we doing?” Draco whined as he rolled over in the bed. “We are going into the muggle world.” You said as you walked out of the bathroom from doing your makeup, “put these on” you said tossing a pair of black jeans, black tee shirt and a red flannel at him. He groaned getting up cursing under his breath. You slid into your maroon skinny jeans and black loose sweater. “Come onnnnnn you slow pokeeeee” you complained, you were super excited to get back into the muggle world that you missed dearly. Draco walked out of the bathroom seeming pleased with the outfit you picked. You both slid on black boots and headed out of your apartment. You made it to your car and directed Draco to sit in the passenger seat, “put on your seat belt” you commanded as you clicked yours in and started the car. He looked around him turning his head from side to side unable to find what you were talking about, you leaned over to his side and grabbed his seat belt buckling it for him, then kissing him on his cheek laughing as he started to blush. You put the car into drive and started backing out of the parking space you were in, “how do you know how to work this? Why couldn’t we just appirate? Why were you raised in the muggle world if you’re a pure blood?” Draco said thinking about each question carefully, you giggled shaking your head and glanced at the time, only 11:30 this’ll be a long day, you thought to yourself. “Well Draco I know how to drive cause I was taught, we can’t appirate because muggles aren’t used to seeing someone appear out of thin air plus you’re getting the full experience. As for why I was raised here, my parents were both doctors here in the muggle world trying to help anyone they could, so if someone was sick beyond muggle fixing they might use a bit of magic and create a miracle for them.” You explained your voice trailing as you concentrated on the road in front of you. Draco looked out of the window taking in all of the information you’d just given him. You reached over and turned the knob causing music to start playing throughout the car, Draco jumped and looked at you like a confused puppy. “It’s just the radio dear” he slowly nodded “OH MY GOSH” you squealed as your favorite song stared playing, “ I DONT UNDERSTAND IT, YOU DONT MESS WITH LOVE YOU MESS WITH THE TRUTH, AND I KNOW I SHOULDNT SAY IT BUT MY HEART DONT UNDERSTAND, WHY I GOT YOU ON MY MIND!” You practically screamed dancing the whole time, “this is weird” Draco muttered, “this is a great song” you retorted continuing to dance and and sing earning soft chuckles Draco every now and then until you arrived at your destination. It was a small coffee shop in the college town you lived in since you were attending. Every morning you stopped here to get (y/f/m/s), there was a line out the door just like every other day. You got out of the car and Draco followed as you got in line. “Why is this building orange?” He asked looking up at it, “really?” You said crossing your arms, “Have you seen the buildings in Diagon Alley?” Draco just sighed looking around. The two of you made small talk until you got up to the counter. “Hello, I’d like a (f/s)” you said smiling at the cashier who you could tell didn’t want to be here at all “I’ll just have the same” Draco Said dryly sensing her hostility. She sighed and went to the display case to grab them then you payed and walked it hoping to never see her again. “Come on we’re going to play laser tag!” You said running to the car your hair whipping behind you, “we’re going to do what?” Draco asked looking at you his eyebrows furrowing. “You’ll see” you said smugly smirking, you leaned over and kissed his cheek holding your lips there for a minute before he turned his head so your lips met, “you’re such a tease” he chuckled pulling away. You just laughed putting the car into drive.
As soon as you arrived at the building with neon stars painted all over it dracos mouth dropped. There were barley any other cars in the parking so you figured it would be easy to teach him. You walked in to the entry way with more neon paint and arcade games spattered about and led Draco over to the desk, “hello what will your code names be” said the girl while glancing at Draco. “I’ll be…(y/c/n) you said “umm…” Draco said scanning over the list “StarLord” he said confidently, you giggled knowing he only picked it cause lord was in it. The girl handed you your passes and you walked into the briefing room to put on your vests. “Ok StarLord” you said laughing “you just slip the vest over your head and use the gun to shoot at me on the little targets” you said demonstrating with your own, he nodded fastening his vest on. The doors opened and you ran through the maze leaving Draco looking confused as ever. You ran through trying to find a good hiding spot, as soon as you found a little corner to hide you shot everyone that passed including Draco. “YES!” You whisper-yelled as you shot what looked like a 6 year old several times. You did a little victory dance to celebrate until you felt your best viabrate indicating someone shot you. You spun in a circle noticing there was a little corner just behind yours that you could see perfectly. You shot blinding hoping to hit something, then a dark shadow ran towards you causing you to squeal. You ran but much to your avail you felt two arms wrap around your waist, “I always win” Draco whispered in your ear sending shivers down your spine. You froze for a moment before spinning around “save it for later” you whispered, standing on your tiptoes to reach his ear. You winked and heard the buzzer sounding to show the game had ended, you walked out pulling Dracos hand behind you. You walked out getting into the car and starting it to go to your final stop. “That was fun but I know a way to have more fun” he said with a smirk playing on his lips, you leaned over your lips almost touching “maybe later” you said in a bored tone leaning back into your seat leaving him shaking his head. “We’re going shopping” you told him keeping your eyes on the road, “I’ve been shopping before” he said stating the obvious, “I know but never in a mall helping your girlfriend pick out clothes” you said as a matter of factly.
You pulled in finding a parking spot amongst the many cars. You climbed out and started walking towards the mall Draco holding your hand, “ok so this is just a big building with a bunch of clothing stores in if. And I need a dress for that dinner we’re going to on Friday” you stated as you walked in the big doors revealing all of the stores. “Great” Draco said sarcasm practically dripping from the words. You guys went in almost every store before you found a dress you fell in love with. “Ok sit here” you told Draco pointing to a bench outside the changing room. He did as told and you went in slipping on the right red sequin dress that came just above your knee and was a high neck halter. You spin around in the mirror looking at yourself then decided to show Draco. “So” you said doing model like poses in front of him “what do you think?” He looked up at you his jaw dropping “wow” is all he managed to get out “you look stunning” you felt a hot rush go to your cheeks as you could tell they turned red. “Yes, but I have a feeling it would look better off” he said smirking once again, you grabbed the hanger from the hook in the dressing room and smacked him on the head laughing, then walking back in to change. You quickly payed then walked out of the mall the tension growing by the second, as soon as you reached the car and got in he grabbed your face and kissed you passionately. You pulled away causing him to pout and started driving home. You quickly grabbed the bag with the dress and sprinted inside Draco laughing trying to catch up, “catch me if you can!” You yelled back dropping the bag on the floor of the apartment. You ran upstairs and grabbed your wand from in your purse as you slowly crept around the corner out of the bedroom looking for him your wand ready. You peered out of the room and heard a slight crackle behind you. Figuring it was the wind against the window you ignored it then arms quickly grabbed your waist and lifted you up spinning around “I caught you” Draco whispered in your ear. You spun around to face him your lips immediately connecting Into an intense kiss. He shut the door with his foot and pushed you up against it. “Jump” he said in between kisses you did as you were told and jumped wrapping your legs around his torso as he grabbed your butt causing you to gasp. He walked over to the bed and threw you down climbing on top of you and continuing the kiss. “I had fun today” he whispered into the kiss “I love you” your breath hitched your throat before breathily saying “I love you too”

Okay, it’s time to say this.




Let me calm down for a second.
Look, I, myself, am a Pharmercy shipper, but I absolutely loathe the amount of hate and or harassment other people get for shipping Mercy with ANYONE ELSE. 
I’m mainly talking about the harassment Mercy76 shippers get.
Guys, there are so many polite Mercy76 shippers out there who just want to ship what they think is canon, and some of them even like Pharmercy! They just ship Mercy with someone else. That doesn’t mean that they hate Pharmercy. They just think Mercy and 76 are more compatible/more cute. Please stop harassing or hating on them.
I shouldnt have to watch people harass other people because one person just wanted more Mercy76 fanfiction. It is FANFICTION, PEOPLE. Its not like you arent still going to get more fanfics of your pairing, because you will.

Guys, NONE of the Overwatch characters have confirmed sexualities. You can’t go “Oh! But Mercy is a lesbian! She wouldn’t be into men!” or “Mercy is obviously straight, you’re wrong!” to people when there are no confirmed sexualites for OW characters. People are therefore allowed to give the character their headcanon sexuality if they so please. I have headcanon sexualities for OW characters! Everyone does! If you think Mercy is bi or a lesbian, then you can believe that! If you think Mercy is straight, then you can believe that! You, however, cannot tell someone that their sexuality headcanon for that character is false because you see differently. I personally think that Mercy is bisexual, for example. I’m not going to attack someone if they think she’s straight. That’s their opinion, and I respect it.

And please don’t say “But what about the age gap!” for either Pharmercy or Mercy76. Because first of, for Pharmercy, five years is not a bad age gap, okay?
And no, I’m not about to bash Mercy76. Trust me.
I’ve recently talked to an EXTREMEMLY POLITE Mercy76 shipper((who I won’t tag because I don’t know if they would be okay with that, if you want me to I’ll edit you in)) who made me realize that;
1. The Mercy76 age gap would still be okay AS LONG as both of the members of the relationship CONSENTED TO IT. Couples with an age gap like that EXIST IN REAL LIFE as well. It may be looked down upon, but who the fuck cares?
2. Some Mercy76 shippers have headcanons that decrease 76′s age. Which is totally okay guys. It’s okay to decrease a characters age, since, guess what guys. WE DONT KNOW 76′S ACTUAL AGE. And no, you shouldn’t bash someone’s headcanon either. Which leads me to my next topic

Please, please don’t bash on someone else’s headcanon because it either goes against your ship or because you just don’t agree with it. It isn’t okay, it’s EXTREMELY rude, and nobody fucking likes that. Imagine if someone bashed you and your headcanon because they disliked it? How would that make you feel? So don’t fucking do it.

I know that I’m probably going to get bashed for even writing this post, but before you try to send me death threats, please remember that these are FICTIONAL CHARACTERS.

Do you think that it’s okay to send someone death threats or hate because they disagree with something about a character that doesnt even exist? Because seriously guys, you could probably find much more things to be angry about.

So, please stop harassing people for a ship that’s different than yours.

Anyways, I’m done here. 

TLDR: I respect Mercy76 and any other Mercy/Character ship, and I don’t appreciate people harassing people because they ship something thats different then what they ship. Please stop.

These few updates are really sitting well with me. Even though right now, our focus is on Dave, Karkat, and John, who’ve had the most screentime outta anyone, but how were going about this is simply amazing when we look back at the other timeline.

Dave is addressing his most critical flaws and emotional setbacks in generally what can be seen as casual conversation. His fear of death, his sexuality, family. I believe soon he might also address Bro’s abuse, which can tie in to the very likely neglect Rose faced with Mom Lalonde. Anyway back on point,this is huge for Dave’s character. He lies, he hides things from his friends, masks his insecurities with rambling and rapping. most importantly hes doing this with John, his best friend, and Karkat, who we can presume is his boyfriend/matesprite now or maybe moirail. Barely talking about his friendship with the other kids before was hard for him, he refused to talk about death at all in the other timeline, going a far as making himself believe doomed selves were an enemy.

Going into Dave’s sexuality itself, he’s most likely bisexual (ill prob address my trans male dave headcanon in another post) Canon attraction to jade, Jane, and Terezi, and there’s very little NOT screaming that he and Kar are a couple now. Let’s base this pff the assumption that Dave is bisexual. Bisexuality is often ignored much more than just being gay, and gets twice as much backlash. Being from Texas and with Bro’s behavior (which I shouldnt need to comvince anyone anymore, he was emotionally and physically abusive to Dave) is huge factors in telling Dave as he grew up that here was something wrong with him. He likely only knew his sexuality for himself within those three years, so him being able to accept it so easily now is so important. A personal example: I’ve known I was trans for over 11 years, and some days I have to convince myself that I’m not confused due to the pressure and transphobic environment I grew up with, and I live in Massachusetts! Going from a self admitted homophobic person to accepting himself as queer, it must be an enormous weight off of Dave’s shoulders. Whatever conversations Dave had with the meteor crew to bring this on, which im sure we may see some glimpses of, will be important again, and may be showing us the other problems other characters have. This is a transitional arc after all, we’re probably looking at a whole lot of talking and waiting.

Props to Hussie for this, I can only wait to see what we get as far as addressing Rose, Terezi, Roxy, and Kanaya’s arcs soon.

The fact that antis are angry because Hook is teaching Henry to sword fight just baffles me. Hook is obviously going to become a father figure to Henry (if not already is) I mean hook is Henry’s mother’s true love, does this mean it is disrespecting Neal because he also taught Henry sword fighting? No it doesn’t. For the people sayinh Neal is his biological father, and that hook shouldnt be trying to steal that role?? that doesn’t mean shit. I’ll tell you why, because you’re father figure doesn’t have to be your biological one. I know this from my own experience of my father who left and is gone from my life on his own accord but I have my grandad who stepped up as that father figure and I have never felt I have missed the experiences because of him. So to see this on a show and to promote that a child can have a father figure who is his grandad (David) and his mother’s true love (killian) and people who genuinely love him and are there for him is amazing and you shouldn’t be tearing that down for people who need to see that.

Originally posted by bubu-x3

Tagging a few because come rant with me lol @ahookedhero @xemmaloveskillianx @itwastruelove @flslp87 @hookaddict
[Moon Dust] chapter 1/?

Originally posted by suga-com

characters: Jimin x Y/n x Namjoon??

genre: angst ?, fluff 

description: Being best friends with him had it’s perks but also a big fat negative

I’m building this house, on the moon Like a lost, astronaut Lookin at you, like a star

 “You know, I always wonder what it would be like to touch the stars”, you sigh turning over to look at him. He was staring at the night sky attentively and the more you stared that more his ruffled bright orange hair that  reminded you of sunshine. He just smiled and without taking his eye off the starry sky took a deep sigh, “ There you go again, talking about space or what not, look you want to touch a star?” You gave him a confused look. He just smiled and turned to face you “Well hello!  You’re laying here with the one and only Park Jimin from BTS, come on y/n snap out of it.”

 You just shook your head with a smile on your face, it was something Jimin would say. But he was right, not many girls can say they were able to lay here, head on his chest looking at the night sky. Then again being best friends with him had his perks, nights like these, hanging with the rest of Bangtan and getting first look at choreography, knowing the many sides of him and the famous idol group. Of course it also came with one big fat negative- yes, the cliche part.

Falling for him.

But you wouldn’t have guessed just what this feelings towards him would bring you.

From the place, the world forgot,And there’s nothing, that I can do.Except bury my love for you

You didn’t want to fall for him of course, but come one, who wouldn’t fall for someone like him? His laughter was angelic, his smile stopped your breathe, how he cared for everyone first than himself. You were bound to fall, but you didn’t expect to fall this hard. At first you had that small hope he had also those feelings in return, Taehyung and Jungkook were also so sure.

“Come on y/n we see the way he looks at you! He also likes you, but you know how he is. He won’t do anything, he doesn’t want to lose you as his best friend.” Taehyung told you with a serious look this had been going on since you walked the door of Bangtan’s dorm. “Yeah you know Jimin-hyung, he needs a little push.” Jungkook said nodding his head agreeing with what Taehyung had said earlier.

They had invited you to the dorm while the rest of the guys were out .You sat on the floor biting your bottom lip, thinking of what the guys were telling you. Other than Jimin, you were rather close to Taehyung and Jungkook being around the same age as them. They had always made sure to tag along when you would hang out with Jimin, you didn’t mind of course they were funny and always made you feel like one of them. Sure, you sometimes wanted to be treated like an actual female human being, but you really didn’t mind. From them constantly hanging around you and Jimin they were bound to figure out your feelings for the orange hair boy.

Keep reading

Different In time...

Next chapter is up! had to really think about were i wanted to go with this. but im happy about my story line so far. this will be stortter then the other but more heart felt. righting is crappy because im exhaused…  P.s crap editing



“He’ll never want you ya know” Her words were like ice.

“What are you talking about stacey…” Rae couldnt meet her eyes as she tried to move around her towards her sports bag.

“You kno’ exactly wha’ im talkin ‘bout! He, Finn… He will never want you… Why would he when he has me…: She scoffed as she followed Rae.

“Are you fuckin’ mad. We’re… We’re friends ya know” her heart was beating as the anger rose within her. Those tears she struggled to hold back were dry, she had a rush of edrenilin kick in the moment those words left stacey’s mouth.

“HA! Ive seen the way you look at him… you wanna be more then just ‘friends’ but he will never have you mingy arse”

Rae stepped towards stacey as she slammed her towel back into her bag. 

“YOU JEALOUS! ARE YOU JEALOUS THAT MY MINGY ARSE MIGHT HAVE A CHANCE WITH THE SO CALLED FIT FINN NELSON!” She yelled drawing attention to the argument she was now having.

“i knew you liked him! And no im not jealous, why would he have your fat body when im around… Think rae. Have you ever seen him with someone so… Thick…”

The words lingered around Rae as she froze solid trying to contemplate whether to run or fight. Two years ago she would of crumbled under her harsh words, she would of ran as far and as fast as her legs would of taken her. But not this time, she was different she had confidence… For this moment she was brave.

“I feel sorry for you Stacey. Goin’ round bullying people to make your self feel better… You may be mainstream beautiful on the inside, but you are down right ugly on the inside. YEAH, i am thick. I have curves, i have an arse and oh how can i forget these tits… they could suffocate england… But atleast i have friends, not people that are with me to be popular! so if you dont mind step aside and fuck right off i dont need to listen to your words anymor’ im goin’ to hav’ a shower at home. i dont have time for your petty crap” 

The room was silent as Rae packed the rest of her stuff away. Everybody’s eyes were glued onto Rae, nobody has ever stood upto to stacey before fearing her rath would be to mighty but Rae didnt care anymore. She walked straight past stacey without even looking back, She slammed the door behind her and hurried off home as fast as she would.


Dear Diary, Its been two days since ive been to school. I just cant do it. I wont be able to deal with the stares and whispers, i need time away from this place. ive convinced mum to let me travel to leeds to see tix. Im sitting here at this crappy bus station waiting for this bus to arrive, leaving stampford behind for a few hours will do me good. I didnt tell anyone, not even Finn. He rang again last night ya know… Mums getting good with excuses now. I cant wait to see tix, she will know what to say. And kester! oh how ive missed that brazen prick putting me in my place. Maybe i can sneak a season. Ok im going to go now i look even madder huddled over this diary. Signing off… Love Rae xx


Rae arrived in Leeds at 10am after getting the earliest bus she could find knowing that she would only get a few hours with her best friend. After getting off the bus she started walking to the hospital, taking in the buildings that she grew to love. Some days she really missed this place, but then she would remember the memories. The hurt and the pain that she indured whilst here, the people here broke her and the people in stamford re-built her. She felt confidence raidiate her when she was speaking to stacey but that all crumbled when she got back home, She cried in the shower for over an hour until her legs finally gave way. She still felt a bit broken inside, the words of venom that came from stacey put a hole in her armour. For the first time in months she needed to escape from the world, Tix was a breath of fresh air.

Before she new it she was standing outside Tix’s room, her hand hovering over the door handle with tears prickling her eyes. She knocked twice with the other hand and waited…

“Come in…” The soft voice of Tix rang out from behind the door. Rae turned the handle and walked in to see her sitting on the floor with her legs crossed.

“Rae.. RAE” Tix jumped up of the floor and ran to the open arms of Rae ingolfing her in a hug.

“Hey fatty… Miss me” She quipped already knowing the answer.

“Of course i did! But what are you doing here, Shouldnt you be at school” Tix Questioned as she pulled Rae towards her bed to sit down.

“Yeah, But i missed you… i needed to see you”

“Oh Rae. What happened…” she said softly.

Rae procceded to tell her about the events of what has happened over the last week, From her fight with Stacey to her feeling about Finn nothing was unsaid. The tears flowed when she talked about the sadness and she beamed whilsted she talked about the gang and Finn. 

“Dont let that crude cow get ta ya Skinny… You are beautiful and Finn would be as crazy as us not to see that” Tix chuckled.

“I know. When i was yelling back at her i felt confident and strong but when i got home those four walls surrounded me and i just broke down, i just needed you.” she mummbled as she placed her head into her palms.

“Im here… Im a bit mad but i give good advice yeah. My advice would to stick it out… Show that stacey she doesnt effect you. You’ve done so well dont let this break you, your better then her. And Finn… Tell him. If he is like what you say he is he will be there, even if he doesnt feel the same”. Rae nodded in reply.

“So wheres kester! i want to see him whilst im here” Rae giggled trying to change the subject so her brain could proccess everything.

“Rae he is in london, He left monday… Ive heard that his ex-wife has taken there son an hes gone to get ‘im back” Tix revealed with sadness in her eyes. Kester was the only one besides Rae that she trusted, Tix was heartbroken that someone so kind is going though this heartbreak.

“Oh Tixy, He’ll be fine. He’s strong like us aye”

The next 5 hours went past in a blur and before she new it, it was time to head back towards the bus station so she could catch the bus back home. it was a heart felt goodbye but this time there were no tears shed only smiles and laugher because they knew they would see each other soon. With one final hug she headed towards the front door of the hospital.

She knew that Tix was right about everything, she needed to face everyone tomorrow and hold her head up high. She was not broken, she was not the ‘Rachel Earl’ she was behind these doors… She was not going to let silly words get to her, she was better then that. She pushed open the front door to the hospital and walked down the steps without looking up her mind was in the clouds. She tripped over the last step and fumbled into the arms of someone standing on the side walk.

“Oh my god im so so so sorry, im such a clutz” Rae huffed as she tried to compose herself. She flicked her hair back with her hand and looked into the eyes of her savour.


“There you are girl” He beamed never taking his eyes of her.


i think ive got everyone but just tell me if ive missed you :D














@annemariedted (sorry wont let me tag you)


Back To Last December

The idea behind this is, everyone’s perception of December and the festive time, are supposed to be happy times, with the person you love by your side surrounded by friends and family. But what if you don’t have that special someone? What if December and the festive times are just full of memories to you? What if the thought of December just pains you because you regret so much stuff that you did in a previous December? What if?

Genre: who cares?

Word Count: 1618 words

Song(s) used: Last December - Nina Nesbitt and Back To December - Taylor Swift

December, the month where all the festivities commence, the month where all loved ones gather together to celebrate the season of giving. December is the cold month where you spend the cold winter, December nights huddled up infront of the fire with the person you are undeniably in love with. But I guess for me, December is the month where memories of a time that was once better and a time where I was happier start replaying in my mind. And instead of having the person I am undeniably in love with huddled with me in front of the fire, all I have is a blanket that’s too small and my own thoughts. So I guess for me this year, December is a sad month instead of a joyous month.

But i guess sadness, fall outs and breakups are basically inevitable and I should just accept the fact that I no longer have the man that I was deeply in love with, by my side anymore. But somethings not letting me let go. He was different to anyone that I’ve ever met. And his name constantly repeats in my head like a chant just repeating ‘Dan, Dan, Dan.’ Dan, Dan was probably the best boyfriend that I ever had. And I’m not saying that I have had a lot of boyfriends, but he was the best one.

When I say that Dan was different, he really was different. He always put me first. He put me first with everything. And I feel like a shitty person looking back on it because Dan was giving me his best, and I gave him my worst. He gave me roses and I left them there to die.

So while I’m walking around the streets of London, trying to focus on getting the presents that my friends and family want, memories of Last December is all I can think of and remember. And if we’re being honest here, I would go back to last December and turn around and make everything alright, I would do it in a heartbeat and I would go back all the time if I could.

‘Arrrghh why am I doing this to myself’ I think to myself. I keep on looking back on everything we shared and it feels like it’s tearing me apart from the inside out. It’s been a while but I don’t think you can fully get over any sort of relationship. You learn to move one but you never really let go. Because when you’re alone, sometimes you’ll see something that reminds you of that person, then you spend the rest of the day and night just thinking about that person, what they may be doing, how they are. 

That was December for me. December always reminded me of Dan, even the thought of December reminded me of him, and then I would just spiral into a black hole of memories and all I could feel was the horrible feeling of regret

I get urges to just knock on his door and apologise for everything that ive done, but sometimes I feel like its a bit too late. I mean, it has been a year but people are always telling me that it’s never too late to do anything. So why am I doubting my urges and thoughts?

I walk around London aimlessly, lost in my thoughts when I hear my name being called out. I turn around and see two tall figures about 20 feet away from me. Dan and Phil. I smile at them as Phil walks up to me, Dan trailing nervously behind him. Oh god.

“Hey, how have you been?” Phil asks, wrapping me in a tight hug. Ive always loved Phil’s hugs, they always make me feel so much better.

“I’ve been great, actually. I finally got the promotion at work. How about you guys? What have you guys been doing lately?” I guess I didnt really lie, but i didnt tell the truth either. I have been great, but I havent. And I got that promotion because I just threw myself into my work, something I had never done before, just to keep me distracted.

“We’ve been pretty good. Just finishing up some last minute Christmas shopping. Congrats on the promotion! You should’ve told me sooner, we could’ve had this bug huge celebration!” Phil answers. I havent heard a peep out of Dan this whole time. He probably just doesnt want to talk to me, or doesnt know what to say.

“Hahaha, oh no, I didnt want to bother you or anything with that, when i got it, i thought it wasnt as important as I originally thought would be.” And then therea nothing else any of us could say. Phil just stood there and nodded when I finished my sentance ans Dan looked like he wanted the whole world to swallow him up. Finally Phil speaks up.

“So (Y/n), we were just about to go and find somewhere to eat, would you like to join us?” And as soon as he said that, Dan shot him a look, meaning something like 'Phil what the actual fuck are you doing?’

“Oh no thank you. I wouldn’t want to feel like I was intruding. Thank you for the offer though.” Phil scrunched his eyebrows together, probably not satisfied with your answer. He wasnt going to take no for an answer.

“No it’s completely fine. Plus, we have so much to catch up on. Please? It would be lovely to have a nice chat with you, that isnt on the pathway.” Phil pleads. I giggle a little at his desperation, but I guess it would be nice to chat to him, and possibly Dan, I guess. So onwards we go, to a small little restaurant. It was really nice.

We ordered our food and Phil and I chatted like we usually would. But the atmosphere around us was still quite tense, I guess it was because Dan was there, and he probably hasnt forgiven me for basically shattering his heart. But, i wouldnt forgive me either, and I havent forgiven myself. Why would I?

“Excuse me guys, sorry I just need to go to the loo, be back in a bit” Phil announced and my heart started beating profusely in my chest. Dan and I were going to be alone, and I had no idea what is going to happen? Will we talk? Will the atmosphere still bd tense and awkward? I guess I’ll have to find that out for myself.

“Okay Phil, have fun i guess?” And then he left. I looked at Dan and gave him a nervous smile, he just looked down. I sighed, not even bothering to try and hold a conversation with him. There was no point. But I guess I’m glad that hes still here, I guess I’m glad that he didnt walk away as soon as the invitation to lunched popped up.

But I understand why he’s being closed off. I’m his ex-girlfriend. I broke his heart. The last time that he saw me, that memory still burns in the back of his mind. Because god knows it still burns in the back of my mind.

“Soooooooo” I finally hear Dan say. I look towards him and he looks nervous “Is there anything specific you would like to talk about?”

“Hows your parents? Hows life for you?” I ask. He’s conservative and closed off with his answers, but I guess its better than nothing. We just small talk, work and the weather until Phil gets back.

“Sorry guys, there was this weird guy in there who kept talking to me as he was peeing. I couldnt get out of thr conversation.” Phil told us, and Dan and I laughed, probably the first time hes laughed today. “Well it seems that we’re finished. So im going to go and pay the bill, you two stay here, and no, im not letting you help pay the bill.” Phil quickly gets up and leaves before I could basically throw my money at him.

I look at Dan again and I cant help but feel like I should apologise, because I actually havent yet. But I’m gonna swallow my pride.

“Hey uh, Dan?” I start, he turns and looks towards me with a facial expression full of question. “I uh, I guess this is me swallowing my pride, and what I really want to say is that I’m sorry for everything that’s happened. I havent been able to apologise yet, so this is me apologising. And so you know, I would go back and change everything.” I said truthfully, apologising. It felt great to finally get it off my chest. And Dan, he genuinely smiled at me, nodding his head.

“You shouldnt be the only one apologising. I can only blame myself for the way that things happened. But I accept your apology. And im happy that you decided to tag along today.” And we sat there smiling knowing that everything between us is okay and everything between us in the future will be okay

Giving Everyone A Happy Ending

We all have our head canons about bechloe’s future, and they’re adorable and important and fluffier than marshmallow toppings. But let’s give our two favorite sidekicks a happy ending too, eh? 

Keep reading

let me tell you about this fuckass customer yesterday lol

so she wants to exchange a pair of boots and she starts off by telling me her husband has the receipt and he’s just off shopping around in a another store but he does have it and i’m like cool! awesome! bc i need a receipt even to do exchanges and most customers don’t think i need a receipt for exchanges and get mad when i tell them i need the receipt or verification of the purchase before i can exchange something especially during the holidays when we get a LOT of returns etc

anyways, she first wants to know the price difference and just by looking at the price tag of the new boots versus the old ones i can already tell she’s gonna get back about 10 dollars so i tell her that and she’s like

“no i want you to just ring it all up and tell me the difference”

to ring up the exchange price difference i need the receipt so i ask her for it and gets weird about it and mad that i ask for the receipt which i start to think is a little suspect but i give her the benefit of doubt like hey maybe she just doesnt wanna bother her husband to come over here and give me the receipt

so i tell her i’ll just look up the receipt in our system real quick so i can verify the purchase (like i’m not trying to be difficult, the computer really will not let me return something without the receipt’s bar code or the transaction info to manually put into the computer)

i’m trying to look up the receipt and she gives me MINIMAL info to work with like no date of purchase no card information nothing and i cannot find her purchase bc of that and shes getting SO mad at me so i say

“hey maybe call or text your husband and ask him to give you the transaction number on your receipt so i can punch in super quick, it’ll be really helpful” and she YELLS

“oh my GOD, just get the woman in line behind me because i didnt know you were going to make me jump through hoops for a damn simple exchange!!!”

and like first of all if you have the receipt this shouldnt be a problem but youre being SUSPICIOUSLY unwilling to give me details of your purchase or of the receipt which makes me think you either A.) didnt buy it at this location,B.) that you don’t have a receipt and possibly that its C.) way past our return policy date and u know that are trying to get it past me and like second of all….this isnt a simple exchange thats a completely different boot at a different price i cant just GIVE it to you i have to GO THROUGH THE EXCHANGE POLICY and i explain this all in much nicer terms and she honestly looked like she was going to rip out my fucking throat

Alright, im on an hour break, im on mobile, this is gonna have a shitton of grammatical errors but i honestly feel this is the one topic im gonna have to put my two cents in. Also, ive got 12 messages in 2 hours asking what the hell happened and i dont think it would be fair to sum it all up in a small response when the problem is a bit bigger than what a summary can answer. This is gonna be a looooong fuckign post and i cant add a readmore until i get home…

Im black. I live in the ghetto and i live in one of the most dangerous boroughs in the entirety of New York City. Im black, and i work in a hospital where im surrounded by white people, professional white people in the dirtiest fucking borough in ny. These same white people live right here in the bronx surrounded by other minorites and despite this, i have been called a n*gger roughly 10-15 times in my line of work as a mere secretary.

By white people. Who, mixed with an obnoxious sense of superiority, throw this term around whenever they feel that someone has upset them, that someone who has fucked up deserves to be called this be it a secretary, a janitor, pct, nurse, even other doctors. I have been called n*gger multiple times at work, outside, online, on xbox, and no matter how many times i hear it, it still fucking burns me inside out without fail.

Im saying this because, when you are subjected to any form of racism, having it happen to you on a daily basis does not desensitize you. At all. No one magically becomes ‘unaffected’ when faced with blatant racism. For some people, they feel the need to fight back and rightfully so. For some people, its just better if they just stay quiet, stay on the sidelines. Racism affects people in different ways…

Im saying this because there is a very, VERY good reason as to why I no longer watch any gg videos in the Jon era.

Arin grew up in the nastiest part of the fucking south. In fact, p much everyone down South is downright racist. I have family down there, ive physically traveled there ( Georgia, South Carolina) and despite the south being full of Black people, we are still treated like absolute scum. It fucking b u r n s me but im so meek and quiet and im too scared of confrontations to ever say shit outloud. So i stay quiet and if i can help myself i try avoid anything thatll wind me up or make me uncomfortable.

This is no excuse. Theres no excuse for ever saying n*gger, absolutely none. And while i havent seen the video Arin mentioned he said the n word in, him saying any variation of the word is completely fucking unacceptable. I dont care that he was brought up in a racist fucking shit pile of a state. I dont care if he had a token 'black friend’ i dont fuckign care its disgusting and rude and its not his term to throw around.


This is something he said in the past; This is something he said years ago. People can change in just a couple of years despite what tumblr will tell you and he clearly has. When you are surrounded by people with disgusting world views and you have no way of learning any better, it sticks with you. When youre caught in this nasty circlejerk of people encouraging racist behavior with no way of knowing how wrong this all is, its hard to change your ways.

Mark, Arin, Dan, name any youtuber whos been here for over 3 years and think about just how different they are now from when they started. Snide comments, slick remarks, they were almost always sexist. But being exposed to tons of people who have absolute zero tolerance for that kind of shit made them reform. Change is slow and change is difficult and I appreciate anyone whos taken a step forward no matter how slow or small that progress may look.

While ill admit that im reluctant to watch the Jon-era of videos, all the videos ive watched have been pretty tame. The occasional joke maybe, but both of them were somewhat conscious of what would be offensive to viewers. I say this bc three years later, theyve grown ALOT and I have no problem watching any Dan-era episodes or any J*ntron episodes within the past 2 years. People need to keep this in mind before they callout; they have changed so much since theyve first started and while they arent perfect, im extremely grateful that theyve made such good progress.

God this is lengthy, but i felt like i had to explain myself before I list why i dont think Arin was being a racist prick in todays mario maker.

To start this off, Dan didnt even have to bring up the commercial, it was in bad taste anyway so before we all fucking throttle Arins neck think about that.

Dan wanted to share this story but he wanted to do it in the least offensive way possible. Which is already a task. He specifically said he didnt want to say the n word, even if it was for the sake of storytelling m, bc that shit couldve been taken out of context. And hes right! No one wants to have that shit out there in the open. When Arin responds, he matter of factly states that hes used the term before. Of course Dan laughs like 'ha, good for YOU but im not cool w that’

But i honest to god believe with every fiber of my being that he meant nothing by that? People have said that he was boasting about it but i honestly cant believe that, especially after hearing the sound clip. Like i firmly believe he was just trying to contribute to the conversation. 'Oh i dont wanna say the word bc people will have a sound clip they can misuse.’ 'Oh, ive actually said that word years ago so technically people have a sound clip of me saying it.’ Like he just states a fact. Its true! If someone wants to make a sound clip, they can do it and noone can stop him. I dont think he was proud of saying it but he wasnt deeply ashamed of saying it either? Before people try to paint his pale ass like hes a saint.

I think… what matters is that he knows that that shit isnt acceptable anymore… Hes said it in the past but theres no way he can go back in time to stop him from saying and i think he feels the same way about that. But its not in a remorseful 'oh god i wish i hadnt said that, i was so immature’ but more like ’ no amount of me feeling bad about it is gonna change anything and make it better so im just not gonna care. I know better now so im just gonna make sure from now on im not gonna do it’. Its always a touchy subject when he talks about jokes. Theres such a thin t h i n line between trying to tell a funny joke and telling a joke thats extremely offensive. Its like practically nonexistent and the more he treads on this line the more likely somethjng will slip like what happened today.

This is long, and confusing and complicated but i hope this somewhat explains why im not freaking out over this. Im in no way trying to speak for all black people who watch gg. We all have a very legitimate reason for being pissed off and if someone decides that they arent worth the trouble anymore then thats their prerogative. They have absolutely every right to no longer watch them or contribute to the fandom any longer and anyone who thinks theyre overreacting should be ashamed of themselves. Youre in no position to decide who should and shouldnt be hurt by his words.

I just, wanted to give a reason as to why I PERSONALLY will keep watching him. Hes a sweetheart, hes got a wonderful personality and he cares about his circle of friends SO much. He hates all kinds of jerks (real and online) and he truly believes that theres too much hate in the world to feel the need to contribute to it. He likes to make people laugh and he genuinely cares about the people who look up to him. He divulged a wonderful story about being bi ( or at least his first bi experience ) and he supports all kinds of artists. His literal advice was to just be kind and put out work. ..

I dunno.

No amount of disclaimers is gonna stop people from messaging me lmao but there u go