you need the fix

crazynightsatfreddys  asked:

Ok Another Trivia Question! You're pretending to play your guitar when a Oreo cookie gets thrown into a lake. How many strips of bacon do you need to fix your life? A) Infinity B) 1 C) Pineapple D) Nothing! Save the Oreo Cookie!

E) Mourn the loss of the innocent cookie and then go eat ten million Oreos with some extra crispy bacon as a side dish.

If only it was that simple....

Mom: we really need to get you fixed
Me:
Mom: I’m serious, it’s not normal
Me:
Mom: you need to call your doctor so we can get you fixed
Me: am I a dog?
Mom: ?
Me: am I a cat?
Mom: ?
Me: am I broken?
Mom: it’s controlling you.
Me: I know you mean well, but I’m not “broken” and I can’t simply take a magical trip to the doctor’s to get myself “fixed”. It doesn’t work that way, mom.
Mom: I’m worried about you.
Me: well stop it.
*tight mommy/daughter hug embrace*
Mom: *whispers* I love you, get better okay?

anonymous asked:

What are fixed signs?

Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, and Aquarius!! Fixed signs are one of the three modalities with the other two being Cardinal (Aries, Cancer, Libra, Capricorn) and Mutable (Gemini, Virgo, Sagittarius, Pisces). Fixed signs are signs that have that really intense will power and can be quite obstinate. They’re the signs that have to have things their way or it’s the highway and they can easily get absorbed in a goal or achieving one specific thing whether that’s for better or for worse. If you really need or want to get something done, ask a fixed sign for help!!!

STOP RIGHT THERE

can we just take a moment and think about what would’ve happened if Bryan Fuller wrote Sherlock.

This

man

is

a

gift

and 

needs

to

be

(look how fricking excited he is omg)

protected

at

all

costs

just let this man write season 5, he’ll fix everything

3

Hello! Sorry I’ve been inactive for the past week – I’ve been coming home tired and feeling sluggish and I don’t know why ;;v;; I think I should try getting some proper sleep this weekend (usually I only get 3-5 hours a night) ;;v;;

I’ve received recent asks about the Zen Feels Train – please know that it will be updated after the holidays ^o^ Thank you for your interest ♥ I’m also working on some holiday artworks that I hope to finish before the month ends :D ((It’s super fun I hope you guys will like it ^__^))

I’m sorry for letting the messages pile up – I’m trying my best replying privately to some and I’m compiling the others for posting • v •;;; Feel free to resend your ask && tell me if you want a reply right away! I really appreciate all your messages and I’d like to thank you all for taking the time to brighten up my day ♥ ♥ ♥ Please give me a bit more time! Thank you!

I’ll be waiting for you when you’re ready to love me again,
I’ll put my hands up,
I’ll do everything different,
I’ll be better to you.
—  Adele ‘I’ll be waiting’
I don’t think I will ever be strong enough to fully move on from you. Although, deep down inside, I’m not sure that I’ll ever really want to move on from you. You see me like nobody else ever has- you see my potential, who I can be. You’ll never see this, you’ll never know these words exist, but I hope you know, B, how much I truly love you. You bring out the ultimate best in me. You’ve been my best friend through everything and you’re the only one who has been here when I’ve needed you most. We weren’t perfect together, neither of us are perfect, but damn, was our love special. If moving on means forgetting, then I never want to move on. Honestly, I’m still praying that it’s you and me in the end.
—  An excerpt from a book I’ll never write (#7).

It’s National Novel Writing Month, and You are an aspiring writer! But - alas! - you are struggling to write your epic dystopian masterpiece because your writing is miserable and bad, because you are a miserable and bad writer! Fear not, lovely friend, for here on our blog we have the solution: fresh coriander!

Is one of your characters in a tricky situation with no clear means of escape? Make them use fresh coriander to pick that locked door! Have your heroine’s personality and motivations completely altered over the course of the narrative? Why not have her consume some delicious herbs to explain her utter and absolute mental transformation! Did the laptop you are writing your novel on suddenly crash? Put fresh coriander in the disk drive and it will probably be fine again!

Whatever your coriander literature needs, remember that we have it on sale here all the time, on all six of the official days of the week, and it can also be put on food! Golly! Yes! Yes.

100 years Rick and Stanley