you look like a noodle

whovianerisa  asked:

Hello Mr gaiman. How old were you when you started writing stories ? I'm 14 and I try and try but they are all awful. I always give up in the middle and I can never finish what I wanted to write.

I know. I found a pile of papers of mine from my teen years and into my early twenties recently, and there were so many stories begun, so many first pages of novels never written. I’d start them, and then I’d give up because they weren’t as brilliant as Ursula K Le Guin, or Roger Zelazny, or Samuel R Delany, and anyway I wasn’t actually sure what happened next.

I was around 22 when I started finishing things. They weren’t actually very good, and they all sounded like other people, but the finishing was the important bit. I kept going. A dozen stories and a book, and then I sold one (it wasn’t very good, and I had to cut it from 8,000 words to 4,000 to sell it, but I sold it). I probably wrote another half-dozen stories over the next year, and sold three. But now they were starting to sound like me. 

Think of it this way: if you wanted to become a juggler, or a painter, you wouldn’t start jugggling, drop something and give up because you couldn’t juggle broken bottles like Penn Jillette, or start a few paintings then give up because the thing in your head was better than what your hands were getting onto the paper. You carry on. You learn. You drop things. You learn about form and shape and shade and colour and how to draw hands without the fingers looking like noodles. You finish things, learn from what you got right and what you got wrong, and then you do the next thing.

And one day you realise you got good. It takes as long as it takes. So keep writing. And all you need to do right now is try to finish things.


Judging by the looks of the sketch and colored art, it looks like this is taking place on a group picture with the whole band. And it looks like Cyborg Noodle is part of it. If you look closely on the colored picture, you could see 2D and Murdoc in the background. In the second picture, Russel is probably standing behind Noodle. Plus, both Noodle’s are wearing different outfits and their smiles are different.


so i realised I had never drawn all four gorillaz before, and I ended up doing this. I may have mixed phases more than once here - I just chose whatever design i liked best for each of them.

please don’t tag as kin/id/etc

Arm day

. The only day it actually looks like you worked out. By lunch they’ll be noodles again.

dan and phil play the yasuhati singing challenge: a summary

first of all can i just say i’ve been hoping for a singing video literally since the day the gaming channel was announced and if they use this as an opportunity to take the piss i’m unstanning so fast

i can’t even say anything about the intro because… okay dan

they’d best try to sing properly

i can take this game as long as they properly try to sing

“the game that almost got our neighbours to call the police and we’re back doing it again because we don’t care anymore” because you’re moving??????????

“after watching the footage i didn’t know i could physically make those noises”

they went through the comments to look for songs,,,, you all best not have let me down

i already have firm ideas about the most popular requests

“this is going to be a disaster, i hope you’re ready for the best and worst video you may ever see in your life.”

phil sings my heart will go on in the shower

dan’s face suggests he is well aware of that fact

“do i have to sing it in key?” // “you have to try”

i’m going to be mad if he doesn’t try

after the first note i am already mad and dan is already traumatised

“i could never open the door, celine dion is dead”

“if i was on the titanic and someone was singing that, i’d push you off” i’m with dan on this one sorry phil

the top comment is to sing dan’s diss track

is this actually happening

oh my god it is

okay people let’s all sit back and enjoy this

phil mouths along with him that’s so cute

i am also mouthing along with him as i assume you are too but phil is cuter than all of us

freakishly tool

you look like a noodle, you’ve got hair that was cool in 2007 and wet you just look like a noodle

he’s just in a noodle state of mind it seems

i’m sad phil didn’t do his wink at the shipping with friend line

he fails the game during the reasons why dans a fail rap,,, honestly i relate that’s the one part i can never do either

subtle boaster dan is back

oh god danger men at work

people,,,, thank you but also why

“tatinof isn’t over yet!” dan pls

dan is mouthing the words along with phil this time

whilst also doing little shovey forward hand movements

dan struggles to contain his laughter and phil shushes him truly iconic

phil goes wrong and dan can’t help but correct him

dan’s doing his exaggerated crying face that he does in main channel videos i think he’s physically cringing

dan’s hair is particularly fluffy and i am living for it

why has phil’s voice suddenly gone squeaky

“phil you need to work on your subtlety. you go straight full loudness”

stop talking over each other please i’m begging you it’s incredibly hard to summarise when you do this

“the phil without a chill”

“i’m so sick of dan watching remixes of this song, it’s all i hear in this apartment” maybe you shouldn’t spend every waking moment in the same room then pal

their collab attempt ends just as soon as ig begins

the ‘help me’ dan says in the middle of his 'singing’ accurately represents me right now trying to summarise the damn thing

there are no words for this

“i feel like the police are on their way” honey you’ve made worse noises on a louder scale trust me you’re fine

shout out to the shaved sides though hello

they don’t know the neighbour who’s on the other side of the office wall

“it could be a bedroom…” // “rip that person’s marriage”

aaand now we’re into the requests i knew would come up

“gerard isn’t dead. his dream is” there are going to be some pissed off people in the comments section of this video aren’t there

is phil’s voice breaking already or is the microphone just not knowing how to handle it

“in tune!” dan represents me screaming at the laptop screen every time they open their mouths during this video

phil keeps switching between philippa and back to himself again and it’s lowkey fic inspo

“this is the worst experience of my life” you’re telling me dan, you’re telling me

we’ve all seen you both singing toxic whilst drunk don’t hide from your past

“i regret ever listening to my chemical romance because of that one experience just now, you have just ruined my life”

phil is choosing one for dan

there’s another request i saw coming

“let’s keep with this theme” what theme are you referring to there danny boy

honestly just take a second to imagine dan singing shout out to my ex

now that would be quality content


“make it more tuneful than my welcome to the black parade” // “is that hard”

this is not what we had in mind when we write singer/band aus

“you spat everywhere, so much saliva”

“you sound like a cow” phil the savage

“oh my god what am i witnessing” phil honestly same

try summarising it it’s more difficult than you think

“i can’t produce the breath” i’m sure i’ve written that line of dialogue before dan thank you for bringing my work to life

“it’s over” phil says as he places a sad hand on dan’s back

how many of you are freaking out over that contact

“i wish this was the dan and phil actually trying to sing beautiful songs that you care about experience that you crave. this is the opposite of that” YOU’RE TELLING ME DANIEL YOU’RE TELLING ME

i feel hurt

“some people in the future might enjoy this music” // “that future shouldn’t exist”

one more

a duet to finish off

aaaand here we go with toxic

will it be better than that infamous drunk karaoke video

probably not but let’s see

“we’ve been building up to this moment for our entire lives, dan. we can do it”

“your breast britney” says dan and phil is right there to drag him for it like the absolute savage he keeps proving himself to be

this is definitely going to be someone’s ringtone

i can’t wait for the new and updated dan and phil singing compilation

'with the taste of your lips i’m on a hide’ okay dan

phil is not into this at all

until it gets to the bits between verses he’s all about those parts

phil chooses to go high and dan chooses to go low


do what you will with that information, smut writers, interpret that any way you like

they nearly beat the high score

no you definitely didn’t sing the lyrics correctly dan but you did well

“i went into my own little universe then” was it a universe of not giving a tiny rats ass, phil, because it seemed like it

“i think i’m gonna lose my voice for about a month now” // “i feel like i’ve eaten a horse”

“i’d be surprised if we’ve got any subscribers left after that” i’m just sad you let me down with having singing in the title and not giving me what i’ve been craving for years

dan tries to push the video and blame onto us nice how responsible

“i feel like we should never do this again” i agree

“that’s the end of this channel, maybe” well you brought it upon yourselves if it is

“give us a thumbs up if you enjoyed our beautiful tones” how dare you mock me

“less screamy content”

“hope you’re having a good day and your ears aren’t broken” no but my heart and trust is



anonymous asked:

"you got hair that was cool in 2007 and wet you just look like a noodle" he forgot his own lyrics whata loser

my biggest kink is when dan is forced to acknowledge his word flubs bc he always plays it off like its nothing when we all heard it

The author read the prompt four times. “Are you fucking kidding me?” The author groaned, then sighed. The author stared at you then began typing, while looking you in the eyes. The author doesn’t need to look in order to type.

“I love you, Dee.” Dennis said. There was no scheme, Dennis wasn’t dying either. You brought this on yourself.

Dee smiled at Dennis. “I love you too, Dennis.” She held his hand. Who knows what’s up with her.

Dennis grows four feet taller. “Let’s run away together. “ He suggests. “Take your back brace because your spine is fucked up.” His voice is extremely high pitched now. It’s like one of those fucking chipmunks.

Dee curves to the left an extreme amount. She looks like a fucking noodle. “I don’t know what you mean.” She says.

Dennis furrowed his brows and grimaced. Dee was curving more. Her spine was growing and curving. Dennis screamed as his SISTER turned into a human silly straw.

You don’t get deedennis. You get a giant chipmunk Dennis and Dee turning into a silly straw. Have fun blowing your load to that, asshole. The author slams your head against the table and you die instantly.

Tom Hiddleston Request

Can I ask for a Tom Hiddleston imagine? him and YN were cast to play Adam and Eve on the movie “Only Lovers Left Alive” (AWESOME MOVIE ! ) and both fell in love. they become the golden couple of hollywood.


You were walking across the lot with one of the stage managers who was showing you around what would be your second home until production wrapped up. You had just been casted on the new production of Only Lover Left Alive as the one of the main characters, Eve. “Oh look, your husband,” the manager said jokingly as Tom Hiddleston appeared on set. “Tom,” he called him over. “This is Y/N Y/L/N, as I’m sure you know she’ll be playing Eve.”

“Nice to meet you,” he smiled and offered to shake your hand.

“You too,” you shook his hand.

“I’m being called to a meeting with the director. I’ll see you both on set,” the manager said and left the two of you alone.

“So, are you excited to start filming tomorrow,” you asked.

“More excited for that than having to sit and try on all the clothes and wigs today,” he chuckled.

“Ah, the clothes are my favorite part. Speaking of, I better get going or they are going to kill. I have a wig that weighs, like, 20 lbs to put on,” you smirked.

“If you want, we could try and meet up and rehearse lines later this week, when we get closer to our scenes together.”

“That’d be great.”


After about 4 months of filming you two finally allowed yourselves to start dating. You two kept it secret until the movie premiere, you two accompanied each other as dates and released an official statement the month after that you two were dating.

Now, nearly four years later, 11 movies, two of which you two did together, and countless red carpet events you two were about to attend the newest movie premiere for Tom’s latest Thor movie.

After a year of dating Hollywood and the fans lovingly referred to you two as Hollywood’s Golden Couple. Ever since then, whenever another beloved couple would break up you and Tom would be tagged in thousands of posts about how you two were one of the reminders that love still existed.

“What do you have planned for today, Love,” Tom walking into your shared home freshly showered and dressed for the day.

“I have to go for my final fitting today and pick up my jewelry for the premiere this next week. Other than that I am all yours,” you grinned.

“Perfect. How about after your fitting we go to our favorite Italian place downtown and take a stroll around the park?”

“Only if you let me finally go in that new adoption center,” you had been begging him for weeks to go to the new animal adoption center to adopt a new puppy.

“Fine,” he played it off, “but we are only looking,” he said sternly.

“Fine, fine, ok. Only looking.”

“I mean it,” he pretended to be stern and pointed a finger at you.

“Ok, ok, looking only.”

Your fitting went well, everything looked perfect. You and Tom went and picked up the jewelry that was being lent to you for the premiere. As you ate your linguini and munched on the bread in front of you, you held hands with the one Tom wasn’t using. With a semi-loud slurp you sucked in the noodle. “Why are you looking at me like that,” you blushed slightly seeing Tom watching you from across the table.

“Just thinking about how lucky I am,” he smirked. “Somehow I’m with a woman who can look gorgeous even with pasta sauce over her chin,” he chuckled. You hand flew to your face and wiped the sauce from your face.

“Oh, whatever,” you smiled and looked down.

“It’s true. I feel lucky every day when I’m with you.”

“I feel the same way, babe,” you leaned over and gave him a quick kiss.  You left the restaurant and walked around the park, smiling and saying hello to the fans and paparazzi that you came across.

“Oh look,” you faked surprise and pointed to the store across the street, “a new animal adoption place that I have never seen before,” you said very monotonically.

“Oh look,’’ he copied you, “how interesting that that new store is there.”

You pulled him along as you jogged across the street and into the store. You let an “Aw” escape your lips as you looked at the dogs and kittens in their cages. “Oh my Gosh,” you excitedly gasped. In a little cage by himself was a small black lab. Over the past month you had been bugging Tom to get one. “Tom, can we play with him? Please,” you whinned.

“I guess one won’t hurt.” You were shocked at how easy he gave in but went with it. With a grin he called a worker over and asked to play with the lab. You squealed from excitement as the worker came back with the puppy and placed him in your arms.

“There are rooms right over there that you can go into,” they told you. You and Tom picked a room and sat the puppy down who happily ran around you, jumping, and pulling on Tom’s shoe strings.

“Come here boy,” you called and waved a toy rope in front of him.

“That’s a weird collar isn’t it,” Tom asked.

“Collar?” You looked down and saw a little blue collar around his neck with a small heart tag hanging from it. “4 years ago you walked into my life. Here’s a paw for each year…if you say yes?”

You read the tag and were confused, “Say yes to what?” You turned and looked towards Tom and stopped when you saw him in front of you, kneeling on one knee, with a open box in front of you.

“Yes to me. These four years of you have been the best years of my life, and I want them to continue until the day I die. Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N, make me the happiest man alive and say you’ll marry me.”

“Yes, yes, of course yes!” You jumped into his arms after he slid the ring on your finger. “How did you get the tag on him? How did you know I wanted to come here?”

“You’ve been talking about this place nonstop since it opened. And, I know you’ve always wanted a black lab. I saw they had this little guy up for adoption so I had the tag made and brought it here ahead of time.”

“You’re the sweetest.”

“So, what are you naming him?”

You looked at the little lab in front of you and it hit you. “I like Wade.”

“You’re naming him after a Marvel hero and it’s not even mine,” he laughed.

You shrugged, “You know Deadpool is my favorite.”


That weekend, the night of the red carpet, every question, interview, and picture made sure to pinpoint the diamond ring on your finger and the smiles of Hollywood’s golden couple.

based on this

I keep finding abandoned draw the squad memes in my folders wh y

you can tell I’ve lost all motivation while drawing this .___.’

gajeel buddy I’m pretty sure u picked the wrong target

Ok but imagine your cute bf yugyeom at your family parties

Totally random and insp. by this tweet

Originally posted by chichangyu

• at first he’s all shy and blushy
• but then the music starts and damn 👏🏻this 👏🏻boy 👏🏻can 👏🏻dance👏🏻
• some of your tias are whistling
• the kids are all crowding around him jumping and laughing
• your little cousin is pulling on his sleeve bc she thinks he’s really pretty when he smiles
• then after all your tias are like 👀
• and all your tios are like 🕵🏻
• that one really wild tia is all touchy and pulling at his shirt saying “why is he so skinny? Someone get him some food!”
• she may or may not pat his butt as he turns around
• and your dad is like “so you gotta job? You go to school? Can you drive? You still live with your parents?”
• and then your dad offers him a beer and yugyeom is like??? Is this a trick question??? Am i supposed to take it to be polite?? Or will he think i’m some kind of drunk teenager???
• then you swoop in like no babe you can take it.
• and you look at your dad like, but if he drinks then he can’t drive and has to stay the night with us
• and your dad is like here have this coke
• and although he’s grumpy about it, he actually thinks yugyeom is an ok kid, tho he won’t admit it to anyone
• and, like, u cant dance, ok if you actually tried u could sort of dance, but compared to yugyeom you look like a wet jiggly noodle
• but no worries, bc of course, yugyeom is a great lead and somehow the two of you are dancing bachata
• and it’s the best time of your life

this is so random but yugyeom is the cutest 

Do Kyungsoo // Oblivious

While staying at your best friend Kaiโ€™s dorm on a visit, you accidentally overhear a conversation between the members that surprises you a lot. - ft. the other EXO boys being ridiculousย 
Scenario: Fluff, comedyย 
Word Count: 3,669

Keep reading

Okay I need MORE Voltron language headcanons

  • if i gets this right
  • lance speaks Spanish
  • keith speaks korean
  • hunk speak hawaiian
  • shiro speaks japanese
  • pidge speaks english (unless the fandom have something else for pidge)
  • but in general they just speak english with each other
  • but listen
  • listen
  • after a while of being all together
  • it can happens that they all speak in their native language with each other
  • and thats fine cause everyone actually get it

  • but listen
  • have you ever seen an angry polynesian person
  • have you seen it???
  • its really fucking scary i can tell you (thanks my parents for this experience)
  • like
  • for whatever reason hunk gets super mad
  • like crazy mad
  • which is a hard thing cause hes a sweetheart (bless his soul)
  • i dunno someone hurt pidge or lance for i dont know what reason
  • and like he starts screaming and grunting in hawaiian to this asshole
  • and hes so fricking tall dude
  • the guy will literally piss his pants and hunk haven’t even hit him yet
  • everyone’s picturing lance getting mad and speaking spanish
  • but you haven’t seen a polynesian person being mad
  • oh man you dont wanna know

  • but allura
  • oh this princess
  • she understands everything
  • faster
  • better
  • and easier
  • than the whole crew
  • like kida from atlantis
  • like kida man
  • because thats an alien thing
  • dont question it

  • the paladins + allura and coran chilling on the couch together
  • and lance talking and talking about hs hometown
  • about the beaches
  • his family
  • and man hes just so happy talking about home
  • so the others just let him rambling
  • but he talks so much he doesnt realize he switched into spanish
  • so he stops and apologize
  • but everyone get it
  • everyone understood what he said and thats fucking great

  • but now picture this
  • picture this
  • keith speaking korean for the first time in front of his friends without realizing
  • he blush soooo mad
  • and like hide his face in his hands
  • and everyone is just there like its okay its okay

  • the next morning everyone greets him like
  • ‘annyeonghaseyo!’
  • and keith is like
  • ‘STOP IT’

  • shiro lance and keith speaking english with aN ACCENT



  • even tho they can understand each other, they can’t speak the others languages (except english)
  • except allura
  • shes great
  • but insults and bad words
  • dear god they know bad words




  • 'LANCE!’

  • 'Oh keith! say cojeme!’

  • 'PIDGE’

  • hunk teaching them how to sing in hawaiian
  • or play ukulele or kamaka while singing
  • and he has such a good singing voice

  • like 'holy shit hunk!’

  • 'Pidge, language!’

  • okay but lance singing in spanish
  • lance singing in spanish
  • and dancing liKE FUCKING SHAKIRA
  • hunk whistling at him like the best friend he is
  • lowkey keith blushing in the corner

  • 'nope definitely doesn’t turn me on’

  • 'geobjaeng-i’

  • 'PIDGE’

  • but not all bad words from japanese
  • because shiro swear rarely

  • 'allura what does 'kuso’ means?’

  • 'pidge where did you hear it?’

  • 'shiro’

  • 'SHIRO??’

  • 'so keith you’re korean right?’

  • 'lance, please dont’

  • 'then if you really are’

  • 'lance’

  • 'do you listen to kpop?’

  • *punch him*

  • shiro: you deserved it

  • 'shiro do you watch anime’

  • 'lance i swear to god’

  • turns out hunk is the one watching anime

  • ok now some klance shit

  • lance teaching keith the cuban mambo dance
  • lance does the boy part
  • and keith had never felt so ridiculous in his whole life
  • they’re doing it in the living room
  • pidge and allura loosing their shits in the corner


  • 'PIDGE’


  • like okay
  • keith mumbling and moaning in korean when hes THIS CLOSE of coming
  • but they switch for the first time
  • they switch
  • and keith is not even HALFWAY inside
  • lance loose his shit

  • plead moan whimper scream mumble whisper in spanish

  • 'dios mío!!’

  • 'si si si!!’

  • 'no se detiene!’

  • 'por favor!!’

  • basically hes just rambling no sense in spanish
  • and keith had to stop and pause just to make sure than lance is actually okay
  • like holy shit

  • lance cannot SPEAK
  • korean properly for the love of everything
  • keith can’t either in Spanish but he learns dirty things

  • sex has never been so amazing for lance  


  • 'hey keith buddy!’

  • 'what?’

  • 'how do you say 'i love you’ in korean?’

  • 'salanghae’

  • 'well keith if you insist tambien te amo

  • ’…… i hate you so much’

  • 'te amo’

  • 'lance’

  • 'salanghae’

  • 'lance’

  • 'aloha au ia 'oe’

  • 'lance’

  • 'suki desu’

  • 'LANCE’

  • 'i love you’


  • lance and hunk high five
Some random ONS headcanons/musings

(Warning: these were all written at like 1 am)
-What if vampires were like cats where they like headrubs/earrubs so Yuu starts gently combing his fingers through Mika’s hair and suddenly his lap is full of sleepy purring content vampire
-Mika has retractable claws like the other vampires but he hates using them because they remind him just how inhuman he is. Yuu finds them unnerving but also really cool
-Most vampires have a lot of feline/predatory characteristics that they usually learn to control because they want to maintain a cool, sophisticated ‘higher-than-thou’ aura to them. Mika’s mastered this (partially because he’s clung to his humanity more tightly than the other vampires), but then something happens that startles him out of sleep and he’s clambered his way halfway up the wall before he’s fully awake. Everyone is confused. Mika especially.
-Vampires don’t really need to blink so when Mika’s confused he does the open-eyed owl head-bobbing thing and everyone thinks it’s adorable
-A vampire’s senses are at least five times greater than a human’s, so they’ve got a much higher ability to identify/distinguish the scents of individuals than humans do. A beamused vampire they meet on their travels curiously notes that Yuu smells very strongly like Mika and questions him if that particular human is his food source. Mika blushes. Yuu is confused.
-Vampires are literal cats
-Mika is unanimously agreed to be the gayest in the squad so if anyone has a gay crisis or comes up with a pun or somthing they go to him. Yuu is the second most gay but he’s not quite as aware as Mika so most of the more subtle jokes go over his head (ex: 'I’m about as straight as a steamed noodle’ 'idk you look like you’re standing straight to me’ 'YUU PLEASE’)
-Mika (grudgingly) helps the others train because he’s the only vampire in the squad and even he can see the benefits to being prepared to fight a noble on the battlefield.
-People use the fact that Mika no longer has any body heat as an excuse to cuddle him (we must warm you up). Mika has no idea how to deal with it so he just sort of. Controrts into weird confused poses while Yuu laughs in the background.
-Vampires go into topor instead of sleeping, much like hummingbirds. Mika doesn’t rest often but the first time he did someone almost had a heart attack because of how /dead/ he looked
-Vampire pupils expand and contract based not only on light exposure, but on mood. Mostly round is relaxed/idle, diamonds are alert/calculating/hunting, slits are pure hunger, pain, and anger, and fully circular is overjoyed/thouroughly content.
-Vampire saliva is both a quick-acting sedative and a bloodthinner, which is why they’re able to paralize/drain their prey so easily. It’s also part of the reason why Mika refuses to drink directly from people while on the run- while the sedative wears off pretty fast after the vampire retracts their fangs, it still has a muscle-relaxing/mind hazing effect that lingers, and the bloodthiner makes recieving wounds on the battlefield more dangerous
-Vampire ears have a small range of movement that allows them to hear effectively/express themselves: which is one of the many reasons why Mika hides his
-It’s a common trait for a vampire to show one fang if they’re feeling murderous/mischeiveous. They do this whether they’re aware of it or not.
-Part of the reason why Mika hates smiling is because it exposes his fangs, which he hates, but he often instinctively flashes them anyways because he’s so cautious/distrustful with the rest of the squad
-Vampires instinctively like to perch on things
-Bloodsharing is extremely intimate, and is the vampire’s equivilant to sex in human culture (though it lacks the sexual aspect of it, the intimacy implications are the same). Allowing someone to touch your neck is an act of trust/intimacy in vampire culture, because it’s literally telling them that you trust them not to hurt you/you’re placing your metaphorical life in their hands.
-Lacus and Rene in a queerplatonic relationship gives me life
-Vampires are literally cats