you laugh but i am legitimately waiting for it

True ADHD things
- Where the fuck are my keys I swear I jus- oh they’re in my hand

- theres no way I really played 13 hours of pokemon today oh god I did

-either not eating all day or forgetting your meds and consuming roughly 5000 calories

-well I got distracted from my hyperfocus for 2 days so I am never gonna be interested in it again

- oops I tied my shoes tight enough to cut off circulation again

-when you have sensory overload and get legitimately upset at someone for doing stuff like coughing or laughing

-oh shit *symptom I have had my whole life* is caused by ADHD?

- wait am I hungry? Fuck I forgot to take my meds

-Forgot my headphones/spinner/phone? Might as well die

House Call, Part 2

The detective sauntered down the concrete alleyway, as his protégé tread with a light step behind him. Eyes felt something, a feeling he hadn’t known in years. Was that… Music? He could feel the abrasive beat against his chest, a bass level unrivaled by wasteland technology.

Fish rapped his knuckles against the steel door with a metallic echo, and almost instantly, the slat in the door opened and a deep voice emanated from behind the passage

“State your business” it said

“It’s Fish, V expects me.” Fish answered, Eyes  genuinely terrified of what could possibly lurk behind that door.

The voice spoke in a foreign tongue to its comrades, and turned back to the opening in the doorway

“He’s in the back.” It said, slamming the slat back shut. The unmistakable sound of latches and bolts unlocking could be heard from the other side of the door, and opened inwards for the two of them. The music was considerably louder inside, and shook Eyes to the core on every beat. It was some sort of gangster rap music, but in a language unknown to Eyes.

The voice was revealed to be a four-armed monstrous man with hands like wrecking balls. He wore a white tank top over his hulking muscle structure, and upon further examination, had rock-like shards spreading across his entire body. Marked on his shoulder was a tattoo of a triangle with a single eye in the center.

Fish and Eyes entered the building, which elicited the slight glance from a few menacing , but nothing serious. This alone was enough to startle Eyes, who sidestepped behind Fish who was busy lighting a cigarette. Fish stepped forward towards a large wooden bar, once a glorious altar to friends and drunks alike, the dark oaken bar was now a lively spot for anyone with the coin and a willingness to step above the law.

Fish, a regular drinker as Eyes had observed, mounted a worn leather and wood barstool, surely seeing its fair share of late nights.

“Fish!” A voice called from the left. Eyes, still contemplating whether to sit or not, looked up immediately to see a man, well dressed in white and black. His body was truly nothing more than a white circle with arms and legs and a single monstrous eye in the center of his torso.

Fish looked up to meet the circular stranger’s gaze, and his face perked up a bit

“Cuz, long time no see. It’s been a while lil’ guy, how’s the bar?”
“Not too bad” Cuz responded, his eye slowly shifting to meet Fish’s thousand-eyed comrade. “What’s the deal with your tagalong? Witness Protection? Suspect of a crime? Someone kill his family?”
“Business. None of yours actually.” Fish responded sternly.
“Well jeez, pal. Didn’t mean to get you all rough in the gills. Let me make it up to you.”

Cuz pulled a roughly marked glass bottle with a dark liquid inside of it and poured some into two glasses.

“We square?” Cuz asked, sliding one of the glasses across the bar to Fish.

“Sure.” Fish replied  

“Listen Cuz, you’re my favorite barkeep, but I’m not here for the rotgut. Not today, at least. We’ve got business with your brother.”

Eyes stood beside Fish contently and nodded as if to back up his point.

“Alright, I get it. You come by for the first time in weeks and you don’t want to have a drink with ol’ cuz. No worries mi amigo, I love you too.”

“Let’s not get all offended here, I’ll be back for that drink, don’t worry.” Fish reached into his coat pocket and dumped a small pile of coins which Cuz quickly slid across the bar and funneled into a glass container. He got off the stool and looked at eyes, waving a finger to motion for him to follow. Fish and Eyes walked across the bar, ducking past patrons far larger than the two of them combined.

In the back of the bar, a tall ornate maroon door stood in a golden frame, guarded by two of the larger well dressed patrons. One looked down at the duo, and stepped aside allowing them entry. Fish promptly opened the door as Eyes examined what lie behind it. Realizing that some no one larger than him was in the room beyond, Eyes sped through the ten foot door frame eagerly.

The room beyond was the cleanest, most luxurious display Eyes had ever seen, the carpets were stainless, monogrammed with a “YV” patterned across the area of it, shining pillars rose from ceiling to floor, standing spotless and shined, and a gigantic golden chair stood behind a desk that appeared to have been polished every day for a thousand years.

The chair began to swivel slowly, and the occupant was revealed. On the cushion sat a triangle, he was simply that. Nothing more than a triangular body with a single eye and limbs. He wore a white pin-striped suit and a shining gold revolver at his side. He sat up in his chair and placed his hands on the desk.

“Fish. Thank you for coming. Your associate as well.” The figure said, his eye studying the two of them.

Fish took a cigarette from his breast pocket and lit it promptly. “What do you have for me, V” He said, busy taking his first drag.

“First things first, it seems you owe me an introduction to this one.” V said, gesturing towards Eyes

“Right, right. This is the kid I’ve been keeping around. I just call him Eyes, shouldn’t be too hard to see why” Fish said, chuckling at his own joke.

V forced a laugh, then met one of Eyes’ many stares. “You know who I am, boy?”
Eyes shook his head nervously, wondering if he should

Fish turned to Eyes “This is Yung Venuz. Head of the Venuz gang, a legitimate businessman who has often been wrongly accused of revolutionary crimes.”
Venuz laughed, this time legitimately.

Eyes’ stare widened, now realizing the caliber of criminal he was dealing with. Venuz, not nearly as physically threatening as any of the mutants in the bar was the mastermind.

“Look at the kid, you scared him I think” Venuz said, forcing words between laughs. “Come here, kid, I’ve got something to show you” Venuz dismounted his chair, and Eyes waited for the sound of his feet to hit the ground, but it never came. As Eyes walked across the room, he soon realized that not only was this the criminal mastermind of the city and beyond, he could levitate.

Venuz pulled open a drawer of his desk, inside it were more revolvers than Eyes had ever seen in his entire life. The boss picked one up, inspected it, and held it towards eye, handle out.

“Take it kid, you’re going to need it if you’re working with this guy” Venuz said, gesturing backwards to Fish.

Eyes slowly and reluctantly grabbed the handle of the revolver. He felt its weight, which was a surprising realization, as he had never held a weapon in his life.

“Well, seems like you owe me for that gun then, right?” Venuz asked

Eyes looked up from the firearm immediately, staring nervously at Venuz.

“Looks like you’re tagging along on the job then.” Fish said “So what is it, V? Someone get shot again?”
“I wish, my friend. But this one is a bit uglier.” Venuz walked over to a maroon and gold wardrobe along the wall. He sorted through various sizes of an identical uniform consisting of a black dress shirt and pants, white vest and white armband with a logo of Venuz on it. He pulled two sets from the closet and closed it back up.
“Someone’s been stealing from our supply posts in the desert. My boys don’t usually get put on the outposts without a clearance to shoot anyone who isn’t one of us, so you two are going to need these.” He tossed each of them a uniform.

“I don’t have the slightest damned clue what’s happening over there, but I need two out there who aren’t one of mine.”
Fish inspected the uniform “White isn’t really my color, V. But hell, it’s a job.” He stretched his hand to Venuz who accepted his shake.

“I want you two out there as soon as you can, I’ll have a map drawn for you. You have my clearance to shoot the bastard when you find him.” Venuz said

Fish took a drag from his cigarette, and met Venuz’ eye.
“We’ll find him, V.”

The two shook hands, and Fish turned, uniform in hand. Eyes, still distracted by his revolver, looked to see Fish leaving and ran after him.

“Let’s go, kid. And don’t shoot anybody til’ we get there.”

What I'm currently reading

If you’re looking for some quality fan fiction, here’s what I recommend as of late:

The Faux Affair by @looselucy . It’s angsty and sweet and so well-written. Like poetry really. She just posted a new chapter yesterday too and it’s INCREDIBLE!!!

Around My Bones by @lifesbetterasamermaid . I love any story with a magical element to it and this doesn’t disappoint.

25 Tickets by @the-well-rested-one . I am about to read this addictive story for the third time. I legitimately laughed and cried during it and if you like solo Harry, you’ll LOVE this one.

Porcelain Skin by @icanseeyourholo . I read the first chapter a long time ago and got so emotional about it that I had to stop. I’m finally catching up and I adore it. Such a sweet story.

And lastly I can’t wait for the Epilogue in @niallandharrymakemestrong ’s Niall story and the “Meet Me in the Hallway” series by @a-rose-pink-cadillac.

anonymous asked:

hello i am here for some cringe-worthy piercing stories. I know you guys have to have some.

Tom: That would be Matt asking me to pierce his nipples.

Tord: *starts laughing*

Matt: Hey! I legitimately wanted them pierced and you just kept telling me no! Tord, stop laughing at me!

Tom: I gave you several reasons why I won’t do it. The top one being I am not touching your nipples.

Tord: *slides down to the floor, still laughing*

Matt: You guys are so mean… >:T

Edd: Since no one else is going to answer this question seriously, I’ll just say that Tom doesn’t do genital piercings and some guy dropped his pants right at the front counter without waiting for any of us to say anything.

Tord: *starts crying because he’s laughing so hard*

Tom: I think Tord’s dying.

4

HONEST TO GOD ONE OF MY FAVORITE SCENES IN THE ENTIRE FUCKING STORY.

It’s such an earnest and serious conversation about whether or not Rei is one of their allies, then Usagi’s like FUCK NO I DON’T WANT TO GET ON THAT BUS while Luna tells her JUST GET ON THE FUCKING BUS, USAGI, so Usagi snaps back IF ANYTHING HAPPENS IT’S YOUR FAULT TAKE RESPONSIBILITY LUNA HEY WAIT WHY AREN’T YOU SAYING ANYTHING, TALK TO ME LUNA–

Pan over to Mamoru’s facetious interested posture, “Yeah, that’s right, talk some more Luna.”

I LOSE MY SHIT EVERY GODDAMNED TIME.

And then he's so offended when she doesn’t get his school level right and so he whips out his id to show her and I AM SO IN LOVE WITH THESE TWO NERDS BUT ALSO LEGITIMATELY LAUGHING MY ASS OFF EVERY TIME.