you know you're greek when

GROWING UP GREEK

you know youre greek when…
1, you have at least one relative who wore a black dress every day for an entire year after a funeral;
2. your family dog understood Greek;
3.”going for coffee’ meant going to theas house, and staying there all day;
4. every Sunday afternoon of your childhood was spent eating avgolemono soup with roasted chicken;
5. you’ve expirienced the phonomena of 50 people fitting into a four room apartement to celebrate someones yiorti;
6. you were surprised to discover the FDA recommends you eat three meals a day, not seven;
7. you thought roasting a lamb in the backyard on Easter Sunday was absolutely normal, and everyone did;
8. you ate salata with feta cheese at every meal;
9. you grew up thinking no fruits or vegetable had a fixed price and that the price of everything was negotiable through haggling with the bakali (grocer);
10. you were as tall as your grandmother by the age of 7;
11. you thought everyones last name ended in “as”“is”or”os”;
12 you thought nylons were supposed to be worn rolled to the knee, knotted and then tucked;
13. your mom’s main hobby is cleaning;
14. you never ate meat Fridays, and fasted 40 days before Easter;
15.you thought everyone picked ” horta” along the Freeway;
16.YOU WERE BEATEN AT LEAST ONCE WITH A WOODEN SPOON OR “PANTOFLA”;
17. you can understand Greek but you cant speak it;
18. you thought every mealk had to be eaten with a hunk of bread in your left hand;
19. you have at least six male realtives named George and another six named Kosta;
20. you have relatives who arent really relative, like thea Bessie, your moms friend;
21. you have so many relatives, that some, you dont even know;
22. your grand-parent’s furniture was as comfortable as sitting on plastic. wait! you were sitting on plastic;
23. you thought that talking loud was normal;
24. you thought everyone got pinched on the cheek and had money stuffed in their pockets by their relatives;
25.youve accidentally inhaled some powdered sugar from a “kourabie”;
26. there was an “icona” in every bed room;
27. you couldnt date a boy/girl without getting approval from your father ( oh and they had to be Greek);
28. you called it “weeds” your yiayia called it ” horta”
29. you dreaded opening your lunchbox at school;
30. every condition, aliment, misfortune, memory loss and accident was made to feel better by drinking hamomilli



***correction for #17 you can understand Greek, read it & write it too…

ok i drag greek a lot, we all do, but do you ever just get that romantic feeling while you are struggling through it? Like you are translating a dead language and you don’t know who is speaking but it is like catching whispers behind a curtain, the voices lost and indistinguishable but the words remain, a shadow play of light without heat from stars now dead and light years away, snatches of things in a language no one learns on their mother’s knees anymore, foreign phrases and idioms in strange orders that sound more and more natural the more they appear to you - “Truly, you speak?” “Why indeed?” “I do not understand what you say” “I suppose” “To be one, or two?” Watching these words drop like pebbles and pass through other centuries, other decades, other languages and transcriptions, as blurred as they are illuminated.

Is that why I am still studying this?