i would LOVE to hear your thoughts on dear evan hansen if ur up for it i have v strong feelings about it and most of it is disappointment
let’s get the two big bullet points out of the way first:
ben platt absolutely deserved the “best actor” tony he received; his work as evan is the one of the most raw, all-in performances I’ve ever seen in a musical. four for you, ben platt. the cast is great across the board, actually, and the accolades they raked in aren’t misplaced.
dear evan hansen should have at least lost the “best new musical” and “best music” tonys to natasha, pierre, and the great comet of 1812. even if I thought DEH was a complete success (I don’t), its themes of adolescent alienation, mental illness, suicide, and family struggle have been covered equally well by other musicals, including bare and next to normal. the score also isn’t anything new. the songs are fine, with some edging into very good, but again, I give you next to normal. it’s not that DEH is bad, it’s that it’s not breaking any new ground, and that’s what these particular awards exist to honor.
My issue with dear evan hansen can be summed up in one sentence: it pulled its punches. this is a story about a kid who’s so socially anxious and desperate for recognition from his peers that he inserts himself into the life of a family who just lost their son to suicide. the first act understands how inherently fucked up that is for everyone, it follows Evan as does his best to soften the blow of loss for the Murphys, and then watches as that lie helps him fall ass-backwards into everything he ever wanted. it understands that despite Evan’s feelings of isolation and his attempts at kindness, he still has a bit of a nasty streak. he doesn’t pull the plug on the ‘me and Connor were so close’ charade because everything it got him feels so good; the girl of his dreams, parents who are always there, the world seeing him as valuable and important. Connor Murphy’s suicide gives Evan the chance to reinvent himself, and reinvent he does. his motivations are twisted up and sad and ugly, and even the “best” thing he pulls off - the creation of the Connor Project - only enters his head because he’s afraid of losing the pull that his connection to Connor gives him. Evan sees himself in Connor, and siphons off people’s anguish to soothe the pain of no one having noticed his own suicide attempt. once you’ve walked your protagonist to that point, you’ve created an emotional and thematic narrative that’s far too messy to be tied off into an uplifting bow. unfortunately, that’s exactly what the show tries to do.
the second act teeters on the same tightrope the first walked easily, effective at times (showcasing just how good at bullying Evan’s become when he rejects his own mother + his only friend in favor of the life the Murphys have offered him), less so at others (there’s a late-stage emphasis on pile-on culture that doesn’t go anywhere thematically). It’s not until the end that the show collapses into empty platitudes and pop psychology, knocking the teeth out of what until then has been a vicious tangle of hurt and resentment and grief. when Evan comes clean, we’re supposed to believe that all he ever wanted was to be loved, because his Dad Left, and his Mom Was Absent, and No One Noticed Him. this, despite the fact that we’ve seen Evan be desperate and oily throughout, ingratiating himself with the right words that lean on the right places, going so far as to lie to a girl about what her abusive brother thought of her so he could make a clean breast of how much he liked her.
this doesn’t make Evan a bad character; on the contrary, that little knot of meanness and desperation is what makes him such a good one. but the show refuses to commit to what it’s created. when he finally tells the Murphys the truth, their reaction of horror and betrayal is exactly what you’d expect–and then the next (and final) two scenes are:
Evan’s mom cradling her son and telling him that she Should Have Been There More.
Zoey Murphy fucking agreeing to see Evan again in his orchard of lies.
Because it’s fine, you know? It’s been a year since Evan nested into her family’s loss like a raccoon in an attic, and he did get people to kickstart an apple grove for her brother’s memory, so it’s basically like it never happened. People came together over Connor’s death despite Evan’s motives, and it helped the Murphys let go and move on and heal and oh my godddddddd am I going insane? am I the only person who thinks this is the tiredest, most knee-jerk ~closure~ bullshit they’ve ever heard? a breathtaking emotional wound can’t be handwaved away, and certainly not offstage in a cheap time lapse. ugh. if they wanted this ending, Evan should have confessed near the top of the act, and the story should have spent the next 45 minutes earning its neat, uncomplicated little cherry on top.
I guess at the end of the day I’m annoyed at this show. it starts as something interesting and difficult and very very human. it ends as something that’s had all the poison milked.
So guess who finally got an AO3 (Archive of Our Own) account? That’s right, this trash can did! Anywho just a little update that I plan on extending my Blind Lance AU and making it into a full fic, so wish me luck! I hope you like it! Also, my account is watsonthebox (shocking, I know). I will update you all when I’ve posted. Thank you for all the love and support!!!
°˖ ✧◝(○ ヮ ○)◜✧˖ °
He didn’t say anything in
response to her and held her eyes with his, challenging her. She pulled the longest scarf from the small
pile on the bed and raised her eyebrow “Wrists together Jared.”
“You don’t really think it’s
going to be that easy do you? Convince
me.” He smiled at her with a look in his eyes she didn’t know how to read.
“What do you mean convince
you? We’ve been back and forth…” she
said as her eyes narrowed at him.
“Yes we have. You say you have the guts. Prove it.
Convince me.” He stared deep into her eyes as he spoke.
She squinted at him and
seriously thought about climbing off of the bed and leaving the room.
“Don’t you dare walk away. Do it!
Make me want to do what you want.” He pushed as his hands rested on her
“Get the hell out of my head,
Jared.” She growled, getting frustrated to the point she felt tears gathering.
His fingers gripped her chin and
held her in place as he sat up to look into her eyes. He brushed the tears away from her
lashes. “You’re asking something of me
that is outside of who I am. Am I
willing? Absolutely, because I know it’s
something you need. But you have to
convince me to get that scarf around my wrists.”
He released her chin and dropped
back to the bed as he continued to hold eye contact with her. Her fingers trailed up his chest before she
bent over him and put her lips to his ear “I think just being honest would be a
good place to start, don’t you? I went
shopping today…and I found a couple of items that just really intrigued
me.” She sat up slightly and looked into
his eyes briefly before nuzzling her way down his neck and back to his
ear. “I’d really like to play with those
little items. I think you might enjoy
them but there’s only one way to find out.
You have to let me tie your hands together.” She sat up and looked into his eyes, showing
no sign of the doubtful woman she’d been only moments before.
“What are the items, Siobhan?”
he asked as his eyes traveled down her body.
“Only one way to find out,
gorgeous.” She smiled and held the scarf up in preparation.
“I’m going to get out of
whatever you tie. But okay. I’ll play your game.” He put his wrists
together and held them up to her. “I’m being easy on you. If you ever want to repeat this, you’ll have
to get better.”
She quickly looped and wrapped
the scarf around his wrists before tying it off, leaving two long tails
hanging. She climbed off of his body as
she said “Scoot up the bed.”
He laughed and pushed up a few
inches before raising his arms above his head.
She crawled up the mattress and wrapped the long tails around the rail
on the headboard. After tying one knot
she crossed the tails and wrapped them around again before tying a very tight
knot. She pulled at the knots herself
and then backed away as she was satisfied that he was not going to get out of
“Feel free to test that, Jared”
she said with a slight smile.
He pulled at the ties and then
nodded his head after a flash of shock crossed his features. She could see that he was trying to retain
his slightly cocky demeanor as he tugged at the scarf. His throat cleared before she heard his comment
“That’s pretty good. I may have to work
at it but I can still get out of it.”
She leaned to his ear and
whispered “Good luck with that.”
“Mmmm sure of yourself aren’t
you?” he said as he watched her move back down the bed.
“I’m sure that knot is going to
hold.” She grinned and then slid her leg across his body before settling back
against his thighs.
“We’ll see” he said with a
sparkle in his eyes.
She reached out and trailed her
fingernails down the center of his chest.
She was completely engrossed in the texture of his skin and the feel of
her nails sliding down it, not realizing that he was watching her very
closely. She blinked suddenly and looked
up into his eyes to see him staring at her as if he was delving deep into her
She looked to her side and
pulled the shorter scarf from her pile of things she’d acquired while
shopping. Bending to his chest, she
nuzzled her way up his body until she was eye to eye with him. She sat up after adjusting her body to
straddle his waist and moved to cover his eyes with the silk scarf.
“Are you afraid you’ll lose your
train of thought, Siobhan?” he asked as she laid the cloth over his eyes.
“No…I don’t want you to see what
I’m doing next” she answered, not willing to admit that he was at least partially
correct. There was something about the
way he looked into her eyes that simply could make her jittery. That
was the last thing she needed…to lose her nerve now.
He lifted his head and allowed
her to tie the scarf after making sure it covered his sight completely.
“I don’t believe you. I think you’re trying to avoid my eyes. Do I affect you that much? So much that you want to hide from my sight?”
he pressed, making his voice low and sultry.
“Shhhhhh” she breathed into his
ear. “I’m not avoiding anything. Stop trying to guess my reasons. Just allow yourself to feel. It’s okay to let go of the control sometimes
“You know that’s not what it’s
about right? Your reasons. It really is about getting away from my
eyes.” he completely ignored her as she shushed him again.
She climbed off of his body and
the bed and sat in the chair as she watched him.
“Now you’re going to play my
game?” he pressed on.
She stayed silent, continuing to
watch him. He tested the binds around
his wrists, pulling against the knots.
She waited until she could see a slight agitation as he pulled against
the scarf around his wrists before speaking.
“I know how to tie a knot
Jared. Is it too much for you? There’s no shame in that really. I know that doing this is completely against
your nature. You’d likely be more
comfortable if roles were reversed, right?
Truthfully, I probably would be too…but sometimes it’s about getting out
of your comfort zone, right? Or is it
too much for you? I wouldn’t want to
push you past what you can handle. It’s
okay to admit that it’s too much.” She spoke slowly with a slight lilt in her
voice, trying to use her voice to calm.
He gritted his teeth together as
her words dug into him “You are seriously going to regret those words.”
“Is that a threat?” she asked in
a suddenly somber voice. “Maybe it
really is too much. That’s fine. Just give me a minute and I’ll untie
you. I thought you really wanted to let
me take a little control from you. No
She pulled her leg up onto the
chair as she continued to watch him, having no intention of moving for the time
being. She smiled slightly when he
sighed loudly. “No, you don’t have to
untie me. I swear if a word of this
reaches anyone outside of this room, Siobhan.”
“If you’re really worried about
that, then I will definitely untie you.
I thought that was understood.
What happens between us is nobody else’s business. Do you trust me?” she knew if he could see
her eyes in that exact moment he would see them glowing with life.
He sighed deeply and impatiently
before answering “Yes, I trust you.”
“Do you really?” she asked
softly, making him strain to hear her.
“Why are you doubting that I
do?” he asked after another deep calming breath.
“Your impatience” She answered
simply as she stared at the two tools she had purchased on a whim that
afternoon. She hadn’t planned on things
going quite like they were. She had
simply been intrigued by their possibilities.
He growled low in his throat,
making her shiver slightly. His voice
was still a little gruff when he spoke “I just want to know what you have up
your sleeve, Siobhan. I’m not exactly
comfortable and no that doesn’t mean untie me.”
“Well we can sit here and talk
all night or you can hush and you’ll find out what I have up my sleeve.” She
climbed back on the bed as she spoke and continued to watch him as he seemed to
settle into the idea that he was not going to be able to get out of the
restraint until she untied it.
“Bossy woman.” He said simply.
“You like it.” She answered as
she settled back on his thighs.
“Do I? You seem so sure. Maybe I don’t. Maybe I’m just figuring out your triggers.”
He answered with confidence.
She laughed at his comment,
“Nice try. Too bad you’re completely
full of it with that statement.”
“Just get on with whatever you
are going to do.” He said sharply.
“Mmmm this isn’t going to work
that way. You don’t get to tell me what
to do or when to do it. Understand?” she
watched his jaw working back and forth with his agitation but he remained silent.
“Awww, what’s wrong? Can’t stand the idea of not having control of
the situation, Jared? If you get to a
point where you can’t take anymore just tell me.” She spoke very softly, making
him strain to hear her.
She waited until he finally said
“Alright” before she turned her attention back to the bed.
She reached over for the candle
and lighter. She didn’t have a chance to
click the lighter before she heard his voice again.
“Really? Candle wax?
You can do better than that.” He chuckled.
She shook her head and refused
to respond in shock over his guess. She
put the candle and lighter aside and bent over him to his ear “Stop
talking. Stop criticizing. Not another peep out of you, Jared.”
“Or what?” he challenged
She trailed her nails down the
center of his chest as she spoke “Am I seriously going to need to gag you,
He blew out a breath. He could feel his body beginning to get
excited at the prospect of whatever she had in mind. He squirmed under her trying to will the
“Is that a no?” she asked
He didn’t answer her which she
took as a small victory. She picked up
the candle and lighter again and proceeded to drop the melted wax onto his
skin. She moved over the expanse making
a design of curves and lines from his collar bone to his waist.
She looked up and scanned his
face before asking “Are you okay?”
“Yes” he said simply and began
humming softly under his breath.
She reached up and put the
candle into a glass on the nightstand, having to stretch across him to reach
it. He never stopped humming, appearing
to be completely unaffected by her.
She reached out for the metal
pinwheel with sharp needle like points. Barely
touching his skin she traveled along the path of the wax on his skin. His humming finally stopped as he seemed to
be trying to figure out what she was using.
She inched back to rest on his thighs as she lowered the waistband of
his pants slightly. Applying a little
more pressure she skimmed across his skin, finally drawing a response from him
with a low hiss.
He started humming again and she
put the pinwheel down. She climbed off
of his body and moved back to the chair.
He crossed his legs at the ankle as if he was just relaxing. It wasn’t the posture that got to her but the
cocky grin on his face as if he’d won.
She raised her eyebrow and
thought to herself.
Okay…you want to play harder. I
can accommodate you.
She stood and crossed the room
to her suitcase where she had hidden a purchase for when she was back
“Giving up already Siobhan?” his
voice chimed out into the room.
She calmly walked back over to
the bed and picked up a silk scarf. “Roll
over.” She said in a monotone voice.
He shrugged and maneuvered onto
his stomach, sure that he had already figured out her next move. She moved onto the bed and bent over him, nuzzling
his neck, waiting until his mouth opened and quickly gagged him with the silk
“I told you to hush.” She whispered
into his ear.
She climbed back off the bed and
stood back to enjoy seeing him, resting on his elbows, blindfolded, and now
“I think I need to take a
picture, you know, just for my own enjoyment.
Maybe.” She chuckled and picked up her phone. She clicked a couple of pictures and then
walked back across the room after laughing softly.
She heard him protesting around
the gag but ignored him completely.
She picked up the toy she had
bought for herself and climbed onto the bed at his feet. She grasped his pants and worked them down
his body. She pulled them completely off
and tossed them aside before sitting beside him on the bed.
She ran a finger nail from his
shoulder down his arm as she said “You know, I bought that pinwheel with the
intention of just doing a little sensory play.
Nothing major. Just heighten the
one sense by robbing you of others. But
you had to go all cocky jackass on me.
So…no more sensory play. Too bad. You might have enjoyed that.”
She picked up the vibrator she
had gotten out of her suitcase. “We
could always use this.” She turned the vibrator on and slid it across his ass,
making him squirm slightly on the mattress.
She turned it off and put it
down on the bedside table as she stood “Or not…”
She picked up her shoes, the
keycard, her phone, along with her wallet and walked out of the room.
She stopped and slid her shoes
on after closing the door firmly behind her.
She looked down at her phone and deleted the pictures she had taken of
him and walked down the hallway toward the elevators.
Hello, sorry for the random question but I recently got back into SNK. Shame on me for leaving, haha. I gotta ask because I couldn't find anything. Has Levi's age been stated or clarified? Wikia says he's on his 30's? I guess fandom was right with the guess? I remember he was mostly 34yrs in fandom.... I'm sorry if you answered this before but I'm on mobile...
Hello anon, and welcome back to the fandom! :)
The only thing we ever got regarding Levi’s age officially, was Isayama stating that he was on his “early thirties”. The exact number was not specified.
This was some time ago though, and it’s not exactly accurate anymore after some developments in the manga. But I don’t want to say more, since I’m not sure if you’re up to date with the latest chapters and I don’t want to spoil you ^^.
demisexuality isn't real. unless you're sga or trans, you don't belong in the lgbt community.
Oh my god. I’ve done it. I’ve finally made it. I got my first anon hate. This is fantastic! Thank you!
Also, do you regularly go onto blogs you don’t agree with to send pointless messages that accomplish nothing because you enjoy looking like a fool? Or is it just because your life is so boring and you crave attention so much that you need to find it by annoying other people? Please, feel free to message me back with your response, I would truly love know.