First Love || Yoongi
Pairing - Min Yoongi x Reader (ft. Bangtan Boys)
Genre - Angst
Summary - You did everything for his happiness and he was deserving of much more.
You remembered how he would always flash you a gummy smile, showing off the crinkles that formed at the tips of his eyes as they turned into twinkling crescents, at your arrival.
You always knew what he would want for that day, and you would bring that to him. His trainee days were hard, for him, as he had to undergo vigorous training; for you, to watch him come home, exhausted and out of breath, ready to collapse.
But you knew it would pay off. And as much of a pessimist he was adamant to be, you would never stop countering his pessimistic self with your wise and motivating words.
‘You know much better than this, my love. One more month and you are going to get what you have dreamed of.’ You caressed his cheek as he lay on your lap, with half lidded eyes. A groan was all he responded with before sleeping.
That one month flew by, and it was the day for their debut stage. He was amazing on that platform, as you admired him, from head to toe, as a part of the audience in the venue. You knew you wouldn’t miss out on such an important day, and watch the love of your life perform live for the first time on T.V - no, he deserved more attention than that from you.
You met the other boys, and they were just as lovely. The staff and them were the only people who knew of you and Yoongi, and you understood. It wouldn’t be right to expose one of the member of a rookie group as someone in a relationship.
Then passed six months, a year, and it was another whole year of success, as they held a tour around the country. He would rarely call you, but he made sure you knew of what they were doing, whether it be via their account on Twitter, or through text.
You would watch his performances like a proud mother, happy for her son, as he achieved his dreams. And as his girlfriend, you knew he deserved a lot more happiness. There were days that you would actually forget the fact that you were dating an idol, because it didn’t feel like it. Neither would he be there at home, and nor did anybody ask you about him or you both. Months would pass by before you would finally get to feel his arms around your waist or your lips on his. But you were still thankful, that he came home to you.
‘I missed you so much, Y/N.’ He trailed kisses down your neck and to your chest as his hands roamed your figure. Clothes would be ripped, you would be nothing less than fucked and exhausted by the time it was morning. He turned to you with a small smile on his adorable face as he wished a good morning and sealed it with a heart fluttering kiss.
Another year went by; schedules got tougher and more hectic, and seeing him every three months decreased to seeing him every six months or so. Still, you kept your love for him alive in your mind and heart, as you would watch him interact blissfully with his loving fans and the members. He would smile at the camera during concerts and you would know right then, that those were meant for you. Your stomach would flip and your heart would soar, your cheeks tinting with a red hue.
After their performances he would subtly reach out to you through their Twitter as he would express his gratitude and love to all his fans around the world, especially from his hometown.
The day he came home to you was nothing less than exciting as he took you to your favorite beach, and having a candlelight dinner under the stars with the roaring waves of the ocean to calm you, as he would admire you for your patience and undying love for him.
'It’s really no big deal, Yoongi.’ You would blush as he would keep telling you about how much he owed you for the time you both lost to spend together.
'No, Y/N. You are mine and there’s yet nothing I have done to thank you enough for staying with me, throughout our hectic schedules and tougher times. You are one to keep, and I’ll never let go of you.’ He kissed your lips feverishly as he let you know of how much he really loved you.
The year went by, with you being able to meet Yoongi around three times in the whole year. The new year, was the year Big Hit had decided to let Yoongi come clean, of his relationship with you, and the members were endlessly supportive.
But if you had known how much of loss and havoc that one reveal would have cost you and Yoongi, you would have never agreed to it in the first place.
“Yoongi Oppa deserves much better.”
“They’ve been dating for the past five years and they tell us now? He’s not trustworthy.”
“I stop stanning them.”
And endless hate comments were what you would come across every single day, hour and minute of your life. Your entire existence now became just a joke, being flawed or laughed at by the rest of the fandom. Peace became non existent in your life as you had to now roam around the supermarket with a face mask on.
What had you ever done to them but take care of their favorite idol for them?
You did not deserve so much of hate; you knew that much. And Yoongi didn’t deserve that either. It was either this or that. Sensing your hesitance, Yoongi, who had come over after a tour that day, spoke up in what felt like for the first time in hours.
'I- I think we should..’ He began and your teary eyes looked up at him. He avoided your gaze and he didn’t have to look at you to know how torn apart you were. And instead of being there for you, like you were for him, he deemed himself as a coward and decided something that he knew he would regret about throughout his career and life.
’..break it off.’ Your eyes let go of the tears that struggled to stay in, your emotions pouring out completely.
'You know I don’t want this, Y/N.’ He cupped your cheeks as he knelt beside you on the floor you were sitting on, your eyes silently pleading for him to be lying. But he wasn’t, he wanted his dream to be more important than you.
You being you, stayed patient and understood. You wiped your eyes, your hands rubbing at them so harshly that Yoongi had to pry them away from your face.
'It’s okay.’ You chirped, and flashed a smile which would have seemed as happy and bright to anybody else looking at you - but Yoongi. He knew very, very well that you more than just broken inside, the tiny pieces breaking into much more tinier ones. Something which made it impossible to stick it back together.
'Don’t worry about me, Yoongi.’ You didn’t mean to say it in a way that would sound as an overly dramatic and emotionally betrayed person would. And he understood. He knew you really wanted the best for him.
'I’ve always been with you to help you make your dream come true. And even now, as we both will go our separate ways-’ You stopped to let a sob out before continuing like you just had a slip of tongue and it was no big deal, ’- I will still continue to be your number one fan and support you until the end of your career.’ You smiled gracefully, your eyes devoid of tears as your system felt dried and worked up.
Yoongi could hear the breaking of your heart from where he was standing, as he silently wished for being able to make everything okay again. He hugged you one last time, knowing that was the best he could ever gift you with, before walking out the door, never to see you again.
And you watched him leave, his raven black hair flying in the wind as he got into the black van that would take him back to his dorm, where he would be staying and not returning from.
That memory stayed implanted in your head as you watched him receive the award with the rest of the group; an award which he and Namjoon had been dreaming of since their trainee days and you recollected the days when he would speak of them to you saying 'I can’t wait to get that award one day.’
You clapped along with the others, as Namjoon spoke on behalf of the members, when you noticed Yoongi ready to break down. And when he did, your cried along with the rest, as you silently spoke to him, asking him to stay strong.
You watched him from the audience as he performed in one of the biggest arenas, performing his solo track from their best selling album, pride written all over your face, as he rapped beautifully alongside the melody. His eyes scanned the crowd, and for a brief moment, they met yours, a small smile made to his face and you noticed tears in his eyes before he blinked them away and walked around the stage, with a more powerful kick in his voice.
As you left, now only to see them after their tour, which would be seven months later, you noticed people whispering and pointing at you - 'Isn’t she Yoongi’s ex?’
Maybe now you weren’t hated on, maybe now the fandom was much more happy with the boys, and maybe now you were known as his ex girlfriend and not as somebody who took care of him. But in your heart you knew, and so did Yoongi, that you would do anything for his happiness, as he deserved much more than what he got. And he would always love you.