you kids and your weird names for things

Joseph Christiansen Secret/Cult Ending Manuscript

I went digging through the Level 18 gibberish and sorted out all the dialogue into a manageable manuscript if anyone is interested in reading this secret wild ride. None of the dialogue is labeled so I did my best to interpret who was saying what so any mistakes are my bad. It took a few hours to put together but I felt like some people would like more than just a summary so here is the full text:

MC will be short for Main Character or your player.

** edit 07/26/17: minor text fixes, better formatting, the insertion of more images (courtesy of purpledragon42) , and insert of a working readmore **

Level 18- Joseph Bad Ending or True Ending ( Who knows? )

This appears to take place after MC and Joseph Christiansen engage in sex in the yacht, except you don’t wake up to what you expect. This takes place in Cult_Dungeon1.

(Photo Credits: Game Grumps)

START: You’re A Monster


Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaawn. What time is it? Must have been asleep for ages. I wonder what will happen now that Mary is gone? What about Joseph’s kids? And how will Amanda feel about all this? That’s what matters… . Well, we all have each other. I guess time will tell, right? Better get up and greet the day.

Am I tied up?! What the hell?! How did I get here? What’s going on?! Joseph? Anybody?

You’re probably just dreaming. Why would there be a… Don’t panic… . a dungeon. An evil dungeon. Why would there be an evil dungeon here? This can’t be real. Maybe I had too much Twilight Rouge. I’m dreaming, or something.


Oh, I guarantee this is real.

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Protégé [Part 6] (M)

Originally posted by jjks

[Part 1] - [Part 2] - [Part 3] - [Part 4] - Part 5]

Thirty-four hours.

It had been thirty-four hours since you’d yelled at Jungkook and he had left your office. It had been thirty-four hours since you’d collected yourself after shattering your phone set into pieces and ran out of your office looking for him. Jaebum told you with a dejected frown that Jungkook had left. Where to? His guess was just as good as yours, if not worse.

You ran out to your car, the chill of the night air biting against your bare arms and cheeks, but you’d be lying if you said you felt it. You went at a crawl through the streets, stomping down on the brakes and squinting to make out the face of each and every pedestrian you past who resembled Jungkook in any way. You had even called out to a few of them, earning you nothing more than odd stares or blatant ignorance. You didn’t believe he could have gotten very far, but after two hours of driving, there was no sign of him.

The hospital’s visiting hours were long over, which cut that out as an option. And it took a persuasive conversation and a few slow swipes of your tongue across your painted lips to convince the security guard of Jungkook’s apartment building to tell you that no one had come in or out since six that night. He’d left your building much later than that.

You returned to the building, your jaw aching from hours of clenching your teeth and your eyes downcast, staring at nothing in particular. Jaebum greeted you, and before he could get the chance to ask you what had happened, you held your hand up to him. You were tired of questions, you were tired of explaining things. But, mostly, you just didn’t want to relive the truth of the matter–this was entirely your fault.

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Being pregnant with Negan's child would include

Originally posted by snoxhite

• Him being really exited from the very beginning 

• Him only wanting the best medical treatment for his and your unborn child and always letting his doctor look after you even when its about something really small

• Him doing his best to help you through the morning sickness and often sitting next to you, holding your hair and rubbing softly over your back while hating to see you that way and cursing about the fucking shit you have to go through 

• Him thinking loudly about how your kid will be and look like

• Him consciously teasing you with weird name combinations out of your and his name for your baby

• Him telling his men that his and your kid is about to become the best one ever

• Him laying with you on the bed and talking to the baby in your belly and next to a lot other things also about how much you and him already love it

• Him being extremely exited when the baby kicks for the first time and wouldnt get his hands from your belly for the next time just waiting for the next kick

• Him amused ascertaining that in a few months he’s actually a motherfucker, only to get slapped on the chest by you before you laughing shake your head about him

• Him laying in bed with you while holding you tight and stroking over your belly 

• Him telling you how much he loves you and how happy he is to have you both

• Him bringing back clothes, furniture and toys back from runs for the baby and showing it all to you while becoming more and more exited  

• Him being even more protective than normally and always having an eye on you

• Him accompanying you to every appointment with the doctor and getting especially exited when it comes to the ultrasound-appointments, where he sits next to you, holding your hand and looking fascinated at the display 

• Him telling the doctor to not tell him the gender of the baby because he wants you both be surprised and also because he wants to be able to philosophy even more about it

• When you’re in the final weeks of the pregnancy him leaving you almost not alone and becoming next to exited also pretty nervous, even when he does everything to not show that in front of his men

• Him getting you every kind of weird food combination you want while laughing his ass off when you come up with some new combination

• Him getting you pregnancy clothes and literally everything else you need and doing everything to make you feel comfortable

• Him giving you back massages and even more ones when your belly becomes heavier and your back suffers

• Him cooking you everything you fancy at the moment

• Him bragging before his men about you being the greatest woman ever and no one but him will ever get the chance to get a woman like you pregnant

• Him keeping Lucille close to the bed because he wants to able to protect you both and him immediately grabbing it whenever he hears a suspicious noise in the night

• The days before the enumerated birthday, him becoming even more exited but also really tensed and beginning to deeply worry about what could happen or possibly go wrong

• Him trying to not show it to you to not make you uncomfortable or nervous

• When you begin to get contractions him directly getting you to the doctor and staying by your side the whole time

• Him doing his best to stand by your side and willingly letting you squeeze the living hell out of his hand while doing his best to stay calm even though he hates to see you being in such pain

• As soon as he sees you and your baby together, he would sit down next to you and watch you both realizing once again that you theres never gonna be something more important than you both to him and being overwhelmed with happiness especially when he gets to hold your baby

@dasani-saraai @myrabbitholetoneverland


*requested –> Anonymous said: “I’m so sorry but if you could write a first time w jaehyun it would be priceless; I love your writing so much ;; and how you describe emotions/feelings so damn detailed I’m- ilysm🙈”

Originally posted by taeiljaeh

author’s note: 2,077 words. this is about doing a bunch of things first time with jjh, not just the “first time” because otherwise it wouldn’t be as fun to read ;))) 

*suggestive themes/explicit content, tread carefully*  

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Master List of ML Crack Posts: #1

 As some of you may know, my memory sucks.  This list is as much for you guys as it is for me ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ 

I’ll be updating this thing periodically.  I’m putting the links under a “read more” so the updates will show up in case someone wants to reblog this.  I love it when something is reblogged (especially when I can read the funny tags), but y’all are random af.  You give me a good laugh on my rough days and I love each and every one of you ^ω^

Have fun down the ML rabbit hole of crazy (after the cut)!:

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NU’EST Kang Dongho Father! AU

Another father AU, for anon. Enjoy! (You + Kang Dongho)

  • well
  • we all obviously know that Dongho is not the most soFT looking guy
  • (mnet knew that real well)
  • and yes he may look like a frightening masculine manly man who invented the concept of strength but
  • when he heard he was going to be a father, he melted into a puddle of goop
  • like really sweet goop not bad goop just a clarification (sorry friends im feeling extra memey rn)
  • during your pregnancy he would be super duper overprotective and always seem to have whatever you needed whenever you needed it
  • whether that be a shoulder to cry on or a massage or exotic foods
  • wants the absolutely best for you and the baby and would be very involved in terms of knowing all the health issues and risks that newborn babies could have
  • helped you decorate a cute little room for the baby, you both went with purple and white themed because you didn’t know the gender and he was so excited he couldn’t resist waiting
  • researched into all kinds of things and had plans about what sports and activities your child should pursue in the future,,, keep in mind your baby isnt even born yet
  • anyway when the birthing is OVER dongho is like so excited and cautious with you and the kid (im sorry i dont want to put a name or gender) 
  • kids are boring at first but he seemed to never get tired of doting on them
  • would literally try baby food to see how it tastes and pretend like it was okay and then proceed to vigorously wash the weird taste out with waterwould apologize to the child “im sorry you have to eat this, just wait until you can have solids oh goodness won’t that be fun?? im already excited, we can eat potatoes and cereal together!”
  • when the child grew up a little more he started taking them to playgrounds and daycares and stuff like that
  • you and him took turns because your schedule allowed for that
  • at the daycare and playground, the other moms were sHOOK because of how adorable dongho was
  • this super powerful strong man at first sight but then he’s all eye-smiley and giggly and showers his kid with kisses and makes gugu noises its wonderful absolutely wonderful
  • sings songs to and with the kid, from random tunes to the abcs to like baa baa black sheep or some shit as the kid grew up
  • and wtf can you imagine that?? 
  • donghos honey vocals that super sweet voice just singing all the time to your child goodness that would be a blessing
  • but also eventually get annoying like yes the wheels on the bus do indeed go round and round aHEM ANYWAY
  • doesn’t necessarily take care of his skin condition thAt much as like u know celebrities normally do (as we also saw on broduce) but with his kid?? only the highest quality products would be selected
  • would read so many reviews of products just to make sure the child would only be exposed to the safest possible materials
  • yea basically a huge softie
  • one day when child grew up a bit he was playing w them in a sandbox
  • and dongho was literally too caught up in building his own sand castle when he realized child had started putting sand in their mouth
  • he simultaneously freaked out and died of laughter because the situation was so ridiculous, immediately made child spit out the sand and washed their mouth
  • considered trying some sand to see what the child tasted but decided that was a weird idea and just settled for googling what would happen
  • exposed child to a lot of different things, music, art, history, science, memes, you name it
  • found himself learning a lot as he taught the kid and gained experiences with them and you
  • asks for another child lmAO
  • does he want to raise a farm of kids or something??
  • probably
  • he wants to be able to answer all the questions child had
  • is totally whipped for the both of you
  • will always give you two random presents
  • if he travels somewhere for work or something he will always return with souvenirs for the both of you
  • yall spoiled ok
  • cooks comfort foods super well
  • knows all the characters of like the magic school bus and sesame street because he just wants to interact with his child (i almost typed offspring wtf)
  • always handing out free hugs and kisses 
  • gives piggyback rides on demand (for you and for child lmao)
  • he protec
  • is your and your child’s superhero

Originally posted by swoojin

A/N: oh gosh this ended up really memey lsdfjklj sorry bout that LOL

also thanks for 400 followers!!

Dad Might Things

I found this list on my phone and I figured I might as well post it

- Bakugou wants to fight but is injured so All Might has to throw him over his shoulder and carry him away
- Dad might reading to his kids
- All Might walking around with the kids hunting Pokémon and he takes silly pics with the Pokemon
- going around telling all the kids to go to bed
- Literally being super safe and making sure they text him every hour
- “I’m not mad just disappointed”
- “This is a great idea!” No it isn’t
- “I don’t need directions!”
- Going for ice cream
- Random hugs
- Taking pics of all his students and then keeping them in his wallet (scrap booking becomes a giant hobby of his)
- The kids copying his attitudes and mannerisms
- Being the loudest at sports games
- “Hi (not an actual name) I’m All Might”
- Crying when it’s time for the kids to graduate
- Cooking weird manly shit because vegetables are cool but you can splurge sometimes
- Tries to keep up to date on the lingo but CANT
- Classic rock enthusiast
- “Back in my day”
- “When I was your age”
- “I don’t like that tone you’re using young man”
- Some of the boys are growing facial hair and Aizawa doesn’t ever fucking shave so All Might has to be the one to do it
- Trying to get his kiddos to open up by being caring
- Teaching important lessons
- Giving encouragement for things that don’t really need encouragement but he does it anyways
- “Lets play catch. With QUIRKS.”
- “Yes dear”
- Socks and sandals

Memories Lost And Forgotten

pairing: Harald + Halfdan x Reader

fandom: vikings

warnings: smut, threesome, time travel

A/N: It was supposed to be simple, filthy porn and ended up with a plot. I am sorry.

@nekodemon73 @kumpmk @is-that-not-something @un-education @bookswillfindyouaway

‘Be careful, some doors can’t be closed once you open them.’ It’s what your grandmother had always said, right before she would lock the door to the attic.  

She had recently passed away, leaving you her home, money and many, many memories of her. As a kid you always thought she was taking about the door leading up to the attic but apparently you were wrong.  

“She was always a weird one.” You laugh to yourself, looking at the door right in front of you.  

It looked like any other door, frame and handle all there. The only difference was that this one was standing right in the middle of the room without leading any where. Just a door in an almost empty room.  

Ignoring the door for now your attention turns towards the small box standing in one of the corners. Old, faded pictures. Some of them looked so old you doubted your grandma could have taken them and yet…  

There it was again. The strange feeling that she hadn’t told you everything, not quite. You look over your shoulder, put the photos down and walk over to the door. You take the handle, pull on it and the door swings open, revealing nothing but the wall behind.  

'Of course, what did you expect.’  

Nothing happens but when you turn to leave your body starts feeling heavy. You fall. Fall backwards right through the door. Your consciousness slips away from you, right through your fingers. You can feel it but there’s nothing you can do to stop it.  

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anonymous asked:

Love your blog! Could I request an RFA + V & Saeran scenario where MC and them have to babysit MC's baby cousin? And MC's amazing with the baby and just loves to take care of the bab, and they realise that MC would make a great parent.

omg this sounds adorable I’m gonna have so much fun with this one~~~~ I’m glad you like my blog, thank you!!


  • He’s never babysat a human before
  • After the child has been dropped off at MC’s house he stares at it for a second like…… “now what”
  • The baby is about 18 months old so he can say a few words such as “want cookie” or “me up” and Yoosung is s h o o k. He must obey the child’s commands
  • But MC swoops in and manages to convey to the baby in less words than Yoosung thought possible that he can’t have a cookie until he’s had lunch
  • Yoosung has no time to be impressed with MC as the baby starts to go into what gamers would call a “rage”
  • Clearly not pleased that MC won’t give him a cookie, the baby starts to cry, and while Yoosung’s first instinct is to freak out (he doesn’t know what abilities this child has), MC gets up, turns around, and ignores the kid
  • Once again Yoosung is quite shook
  • MC tells Yoosung that making a big fuss about the child is only going to make him spoiled and that “If you were to throw a tantrum, I’d probably ignore you too because that’s a way of getting attention, right?”
  • Our boy really hasn’t seen MC act this way yet. She’s being so mature and adult-like and this side of her is completely new. Yoosung is more familiar with the MC who games with him and acts silly and goofy and immature.
  • And when the baby finally calms down, eats lunch, and MC keeps her promise of giving the child a cookie, just as she had predicted, Yoosung feels his chest swell with love and thinks having a child wouldn’t be so bad if it was with MC


  • He’s so excited and he just can’t hide it
  • Knows seeing MC caring for a baby will be the most adorable thing in the world
  • This one has just turned a year old not long ago! So it’s only just starting to walk and can’t say any words except she’s starting to get the hang of “mama” and “dada”
  • Zen is completely comfortable with children and the baby, much like everyone else in this world, is enchanted with him. She crawls/waddles toward him at a feverish pace almost as soon as she sees him
  • MC and Zen spend soooo much time playing with her and sitting a little ways apart so that they can have the baby walk to and from them in a straight line
  • Zen spoils the kid let’s be honest
  • He’ll sneak her snacks all the time when MC isn’t looking (she probably knows let’s be honest but it’s just too heartwarming to stop)
  • Eventually the baby gets really tired out from playing and wants to take a nap, so Zen goes into the other room to get one of the blankets that MC’s aunt and uncle gave them
  • When he returns though, he finds MC curled up on the couch also asleep holding the baby in her arms and Zen’s heart practically explodes it’s so cute
  • He sits on the couch right beside MC and brushes her bangs back from her forehead, silently promising that he’ll have his own child with her someday


  • She’s never done babysitting before but hey, if she can be crushed with paperwork and phone calls as Mr. Han’s assistant, she can easily take care of a kid
  • This one is a little girl, 2 years old! She can make small sentences and point to things in books and can be pretty defiant of rules for someone so young
  • Jaehee was a little worried about that because MC’s aunt and uncle warned them that she probably wouldn’t listen to anything they say and just… try not to let her break anything
  • MC to the rescue!!!
  • Whenever the kid gets a little too feisty MC’s party training comes in handy because it’s made her persuasive and winning
  • So Jaehee kind of gives MC all the authority because she’s doing so well and Jaehee really doesn’t want to mess anything up
  • But when Jaehee is sitting at the kitchen table trying to work while MC is in the bathroom, the toddler comes up to her and snatches an important document off the table
  • death it is time to panic this child is going to destroy it my life is over
  • In a moment of desperation Jaehee firmly tells the child to give the papers back to her. And the kid immediately does what she says. Apparently being Chief Assistant for so many years just gives you an automatic sort of authority
  • When MC comes back into the room Jaehee is practically gushing like “I got her to do something! By myself!” And she’s already decided that adopting a kid would be pretty awesome


  • He has only one worry, really
  • “If they are too rough with Elizabeth, they will have to leave. MC are you listening. This child may not know to be gentle with Elizabeth the 3rd. MC.”
  • jumin calm yourself the kid is five
  • MC’s little cousin is a boy who adores MC. When he’s dropped off he says “Hello Mr. Han!” after greeting MC with a big hug and kiss
  • Now while Jumin has to admit the “Mr. Han” coming from a five-year-old is adorable, he can’t shake the irrational jealousy that MC just allowed him to give her a big smooch on the cheek
  • MC really wants Jumin to like kids so this is really the only chance she’ll get to show him how rewarding it is… But he’s starting to get that possessive look in his eye and that’s never a good sign
  • Right at that moment Elizabeth saunters into the room with a leisurely “meow” and the kid is deLIGHted he loves animals!
  • Jumin has a moment of unbridled panic as the boy makes a beeline for Elizabeth with outstretched hands
  • But he stops right in front of her, kneels down, and looks at Jumin. “Mr. Han, may I pet Elizabeth the 3rd please?”
  • Saying the cat’s full name along with the heartbreakingly cute politeness suddenly makes this kid a winner in Jumin’s eyes. “Y-yes, you may,” he says, surprising himself by thinking that he might actually really love to be a father


  • “MC I sit in my babies all the time!”
  • stop calling cars your babies saeyoung
  • He’s got a natural talent with kids and his weirdness just makes them tend to like him more
  • One thing that four-year-old children like to do is insist on various things and also pester you and this little girl is all up in Saeyoung’s business
  • “What does that big computer do?” “Are you a spy?” “Should you be in jail?”
  • Saeyoung answers all her questions (some more honestly than others) and that just makes the girl fall in love with him more
  • MC and the kid get along really well too, so the three of them are what we like to call in the industry: instant BFF’s
  • They have the most fun day ever, playing hide-and-seek and tag around Saeyoung’s house like they’re secret agents and discovering that the little girl is actually a BOSS at video games
  • Right before the child gets picked up, Saeyoung and MC watch a movie with her to get her a little less hyped up when her parents arrive
  • And now that Saeyoung has his mind cleared up to think to himself, there is absolutely no question that he wants every day with MC to be as fun as this, them together with their own child


  • MC’s cousin is just a baby, but she’s so calm and doesn’t fuss much
  • V was a bit nervous when he heard that they would be babysitting a really little kid who couldn’t even talk yet
  • He was afraid he would do something wrong because he can’t even see the baby, so if he accidentally hurt it somehow…
  • But MC’s soothing presence is right there next to him, guiding him all through it
  • She picks up the baby, glad that it’s calm because she doesn’t want V to get any more anxious than he already is, and gently places her in V’s arms
  • Who is instantly dazzled by the feeling of holding such a small thing and falls in love right away
  • MC spends time telling V the few stories that her aunt and uncle have already told her about different milestones the baby has been making over the past few months and V is so invested
  • Because V is barely moving, the little girl eventually starts looking tired according to MC
  • So MC starts singing a little lullaby that her parents would sing when she was a baby, and V knows in that instant that he would be the happiest man in the world if he could have a child with MC


  • He thought taking care of a kid would be easy
  • MAN was he wrong
  • The little five-year-old boy that is brought to them is a menace–not to MC, but to Saeran. It’s like the kid’s personal mission is to torment Saeran
  • And he knows it, too. He’ll be cuddling up next to MC one minute and then as soon as he sees Saeran looking, he’ll give this little devilish smile like there’s nothing you can do about it~
  • So needless to say Saeran is not altogether pleased with this arrangement
  • MC is starting to get a little nervous; she had been hoping that her cousin would make a good impression on Saeran
  • So she thinks of a distraction to get the kid off his back for a little while, and turns on his favorite cartoon and gives him a few snacks to keep him busy
  • MC insists to Saeran that not all kids are like this and that the boy is just used to getting all her attention during babysitting
  • Saeran hmph’s and pretends not to care, but later when she sits back down with the kid and starts playing a little game with him, he notices how much fun they both look like they’re having
  • So even though he might not get along with this particular kid, who’s to say that their own child wouldn’t be different?
Revali x Reader: Common Ground

A/N: Don’t tell me your favourite characters, I will use them against you. Both @mercer-safehouse​ and @blueevileye​ made this mistake, however, as I was feeling merciful, I wrote fluff versus angst. Have at it.

“I swear to Hylia if you don’t keep breathing down my neck, I’ll pluck off all your feathers while you sleep.”

The target is across the river, a camp of Bokoblins and Moblins turning in for the night. The path between the Dueling Peaks isn’t especially dangerous but reaching Fort Hateno before the end of the week is paramount. Large numbers of enemies are marching upon it, and between Zelda’s quest to awaken her power, these kinds of distractions are not needed. Urbosa has already taken Zelda south through Faron, while Daruk and Link plan on crossing over Mable Ridge. In all this, you are saddled with Revali, as the two of you are nearly equals in aerial combat and his ability to create updrafts makes your archery skills even more of a boon. However, of all the regal birds in Hyrule, Revali is something of a parrot singing his own praises, disparaging others with his rapid fire tongue.

“You may be quick with threats, but I’ve yet to see you actually go through with them.” Revali sneers, the tips of his feathers tickling your arms. “It’s an easy shot, what’s got you so concerned?”

“Nothing. Now, quit bothering me and scout ahead, birdbrain.”

“Rude little Hylian.”

Revali takes a step back and you hear the wind whistle around him, carrying him high into the night sky and out of sight. The moonlight provides ample light, you pull back your arm and aim for the heads of the Bokoblins, they’ll go down the easiest. The first shot hits its mark, a burst of purple and black miasma singles the death of the vermin along with a high-pitch whine. The following three shots sink into skulls, but the fourth glides over a Moblin and strikes the rock of the mountain. At least you weren’t using Bomb Arrows, but close combat has never been a strong suit; the Moblins stir the rest of their allies and a trio of Lizalfos slither out from behind a line of crates. You clumsily notch an arrow as they take to the water, running backwards onto the path. The arrows spears one through the chest, but it clamours on after you, flicking out its tongue and knocking the bow from your hands.

You yank the broadsword from your belt, reaching awkwardly for your shield before the tongue wraps around your legs. Instinct forces your sword up, blocking the Lizal Boomerangs as they crash down over you. A Moblin arrow meant for you instead takes out one of your attackers, setting a Lizalfos on fire and driving it towards the river. It doesn’t make, exploding in a puff of empurpling darkness. It’s enough of a distraction, you throw yourself up and knock a Lizalfos back, slashing once – twice – three times before it falls over. A Fire Arrows burns over your shoulder, eating through your tunic with a hiss. The last Lizalfos jumps from side to side, you finally grab your shield and meets its awkward gaze. Its mouth opens, you dodge the flick of its tongue and drive it back, jamming the broadsword deep into its abdomen, using it as a shield. The Fire Arrow sears its flesh, its claws scotch your arms like tempered blades; you fight the wave of nausea that rolls over you long enough to pull out and duck behind the other mountain. You can’t go back for the Falcon Bow, not with the threat of Fire Arrows – the Lizal Bow will have to do. You’ve still got a bundle of Bomb Arrows from Beedle, hopefully the Moblins go down fast and you can regroup with Revali. Speaking of which –

“Having trouble, Hylian?”

You don’t even see the arrows fly, just the simultaneous thuds of the Moblins dropping onto the ground. Revali glides down with a self-satisfied grin.

“Shall I collect the materials or would you like the honour?”

You chuck a Lizalfos Tail at his head, growling when he dodges and chuckles.

“I suppose I’ll have to do it. The way towards the stable is clear, by the way. You’re welcome.”

“Go suck an egg.”

Not many people have seen Rito apparently, so the staff crowd Revali as he perches on the bed fixing his precious bow. He’s regaling them with some tale of his amazing feats, drinking in the attention a preening like a songbird.  You’re sitting on the floor a few feet away against the mattress of your bed, trying to avoid everyone’s eyes as you apply aloe to your burns.

You should’ve gone with Daruk. Link has so much more patience with Revali, won’t give in to the Rito’s quips and infuriatingly engaging tone. Revali has the voice of someone begging for backtalk, he seemingly always has something to say and it’s always the final word. At least Daruk would keep second guessing your abilities, the playful rivalry is fine but the nagging

“Are you alright? You’ve been awfully quiet over there.”

“Just fine, thanks.”

“You’re sure? I was just about to tell them how we took down that Lynel in the North Tabantha Snowfield –”

We didn’t. You did. Don’t feign modesty on my account.”

The stable goes silent, a mattress creaks and then Revali pushes through the assembly of eager listeners, leaning over to look at you.

“You’re injured? Sorry, dears, but my companion needs me.” Revali raises an eyebrow as the listeners look awkwardly between them. “Go on, shoo.”

“I don’t need you.” You protest as everyone turns away, flinching when Revali lifts your leg up and examines a burn curled around your ankle.

“You do realize a Lizalfos’s tongue is coated in a highly active acid, right?”

“…have at it, clearly you know best.” You slid the canister of burn gel over and fold your arms over your chest, refusing to meet his emerald gaze. He pulls up your pant leg with a soft sigh, dipping his feathers into the gel and gently applying it against your skin. You hiss at the initial contact, chewing your bottom lip as the burn stings. Revali pulls a roll of bandages from his pack and takes his time wrapping your ankle, tying the first knot tightly.

“Not that I mind your vitriol,” Revali says. “It’s charming, in its own strange way, but you seem…off.”

“I’m fine.”

He ties the second knot tighter, leaning forward with a frown.

“Don’t lie to me, (Y/N).”

“I’m not, you’re just reading into things. Stop being so nosy, damnit.”

Revali stands up, wiping his feathers on a nearby blanket, and then digs into his pack for section of coiled rope. He grabs the cuff of your shift and hauls you onto your feet, tying the rope around your waist and proceeding to drag you outside.

“What are you doing? Quit pulling me, I’m not a dog.”

“Of course you aren’t,” Revali rolls his eyes. “Just frustratingly stubborn. Please don’t squirm, I’d rather avoid dropping you.” He ties the other end of the rope around his waist, creates and updraft, and suddenly you are far above the ground. The stable staff runs out to watch, cupping their hands around their eyes as if to see you better, but Revali keeps going higher and higher until the thin grey mist of clouds obscures you both. The moon, big and bright and far too close, seems to leer at you.

“What is your problem?!”

“I’ve been nothing but charitable.” Revali sniffs. “You’re the one being difficult.”

“Says the asshole whose flown hundreds of feet in the air with  only a flimsy length of rope to keep the flightless one from falling to their death.”

“This is Sheikah-brand rope. It won’t snap and you won’t fall.”

“Then what in Hylia’s name is this supposed to be?”

Revali looks down at you, the moonlight does weird things with his face, making it seem infinitely more handsome than usual. His navy-blue feather shimmer like dark sapphires while the white edges glow like pearls.

“This is getting your full attention.”

“No kidding.”

“I’m being serious, (Y/N). You’ve been distracted and I’d like to know why.”

You look down at the surroundings forests, smaller mountain ranges, as if hoping to see any of the others close by. Revali waits, the updraft swirling strongly, breezing between your clothes and skin.

“Can we continue this on the ground, it’s cold up here.”


“I’m serious, I’m not dressed for this and I really don’t need them gawking at us.”

A fire’s been lit, the stable staff are carrying torches and walking around for a better look. Revali relents with another roll of his eyes, gliding away from the updraft and carefully bringing both of you back onto the ground. The two of you ignore the questioning gazes and return inside, reclaiming your belongings and choosing beds beside each other. Revali bends and returns your bow with a quiet nod, though before you can grab it, he pulls away and begins examining the wood. Frowning, you watch his feathers fall into the scratches and grooves, he clicks his tongue and pulls out a small container of lacquer.

“You talk.” He instructs, turning the bow over. “Honestly, this is a mess.”

“We can’t all be perfectionists, Revali.”

“It has nothing to do with being a perfectionist, but it has everything to do with being a professional. Stop deflecting.”

He shoots a glare your way before lacquering up your bow, switching his gaze between your face and his work.

“I don’t know where to start.”

“Try the beginning.” He replies dryly.

“Well, my mother loved my father an awful lot, so one night they decided –”

“Too far back. Try again.” He sighs. “Cheeky brat.”

You lean against the wall, the pillow cushioning you from behind, and sigh. Part of the worry originates with Zelda. The kingdom whispers of the princess of failure, no matter how the King ensures his people that everything is being done to stop Calamity Ganon. She’s visited the Springs of Power and Courage with no results, and as her seventeenth birthday looms, the Spring of Wisdom will finally be open to her but…

Link has the Master Sword. He is the Hero of Legend whether he likes it or not. The Divine Beasts have been mastered by their respective Champions. The Guardians have been deployed and are controllable but…

“I have my doubts about this whole thing. If it’s worth it.”

“We all do.” Revali admits. “Some of us are better at hiding it.” He looks up, a strange sense of sincerely floods his expression.

“The great Rito warrior has doubts? Will wonders ever cease…”

“I’m not well-liked at home, I’ll have you know.”


Revali nods, adjusting his position so he’s more on the bed. The smell of lacquer fills your nostrils, but it’s different from what you’re used to. The Rito are master archers but wind will carry any scent, so the lacquer they produced to keep their bows strong is scentless, for the most part; you can’t help but think of freshly fallen snow.

“Though I am their best, I suppose my bravado is, at times –”

“Overbearing? Frustrating? Annoying?”

“Excuse me but I was talking.” Revali scolds, reaching out and ruffling your hair. “I am bit much, aren’t I? Their loss. Anyway, being the best and not appreciated does bother me. But what bothers me more is failure, that this whole ordeal will prove fruitless…that I will be nothing more than a memory.”

He scoffs, placing the bow on the ground with a yawn.

“Or worse yet, that my people will forget me entirely. Could you imagine? Nothing more than a name the elders would remember in passing.”

“I don’t think anyone could forget you, Revali.”

“I’m touched.” He moves one wing against his chest. “Now you.”

“Am I…good enough?”

Revali’s eyes widen, he opens his mouth for a retort or maybe a gentle barb, but can’t muster up the strength to speak. This would be opportunity enough for you to make jabs at him, call him out for all his bullshit bravado and ego. But you can’t.

“Link and the princess already represent the Hylian people, Princess Zelda has also great knowledge of the Sheikah technology so…is there even a point to my being here? You’re the master archer, I don’t… I shouldn’t.”

“You are absolutely worth it.”

You look up, not realizing your gaze had fallen to the ground, and Revali leans in earnestly.

“You absolutely have a purpose here. Who else can stomach Daruk’s cooking? I certainly can’t, and you have consistently talked him out of using rocks.”

“But –”

“Need I remind you that Mipha is an unabashedly adorable introvert? Beyond Link and the princess, you got her talking to the rest of us.”

“Well, I –”

“And another thing.” Revali says coyly. “You have sparred with Urbosa, a trained Gerudo warrior, and have not died.”

“She’s never going to want to kill me, you goof.”

“You never know.” Revali shrugs. “Furthermore, you’ve put up with me pretty well despite my…”

“Overwhelming ego? Annoying and frustrating sense of pride? Your unabashed need to critique everyone?”

“My, my. I’d say that bothered you some, songbird.” Revali freezes, you can practically hear the realization hit him square in the face. “Have I…contributed to your doubt?”

The flat look on your face serves as an ample enough answer.

“…you could have mentioned this sooner.” Revali mumbles.

“I thought I was being pretty damn obvious. I’m always in a bad mood after I talk to you.”

“I thought I’d tired you out.”

“You do.”

“Oh.” The Rito casts a look around the stable, anyone staring immediately turns away.

“Look. I’m not mad at you, not really. Our personalities clash, that’s fine, but if you could just tone it down a bit, you can continue teasing me. But nicely!”

Revali swings his head around with an unreadable expression, he folds his arms over his chest and sighs deeply through his nose. After a moment, he stands up and comes to sit on your bed, eyeing the bandage he tied around your ankle.

“I still need to apologize. If I’m going to be remembered at all, I want to be remembered well.”

“So, I’m sorry.” He bows his head. “You hairless wrinkly monkey.”

“That’s it. I’m having roasted chicken tonight.”


Odd-ish OC Asks

Idk… I just wanna know some weird things about your virtual kids…. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Send a number and the name(s) of the OC(s) you want answers for.

*It helps if you put the names of the OCs you’re willing to respond for in the tags when reblogging the ask list

  1. How do they respond to having a song stuck in their head? Does that happen to them often?
  2. How do they feel about confronting their friends when issues arise? 
  3. When speaking to themselves in their mind, how do they refer to themselves?
  4. Do they enjoy wearing socks/stockings when they aren’t wearing shoes?
  5. Do they have any unappealing habits (ex: picking their nose, hawking loogies)?
  6. How do they cope with losing a game?
  7. How do they cope with losing an argument?
  8. How do they cope with losing a friend?
  9. How do they cope with losing a lover?
  10. Do they enjoy sitting on countertops?
  11. How expressive is their face? Are they easy to read?
  12. How do they deal with experiencing physical pain?
  13. Are they easily insulted?
  14. Would they prefer to act or react?
  15. How would they respond to performing on stage?
  16. Would they ever wear perfume or cologne? When? What would the scent be?
  17. Could their personality or interests be considered “flighty?” Do they change their mind/interests often?
  18. Do they daydream? Of what?
  19. What is the most inappropriate thing they have ever done in public?
  20. What was their favorite toy as a child?
  21. What was their favorite way to play as a child (ex: playing pretend, playing games with rules like tag,)?
  22. How do the sneeze (ex: loudly, quietly, openly, into their elbow, hold the sneeze in)?
  23. When engaged in an irritating conversation, how to they conduct themselves?
  24. What words make them cringe?
  25. How do they feel in large crowds?
  26. Would they ever spend an afternoon in a library? What section would they spend the most time in?
  27. Do they find it difficult to try new foods?
  28. If a friend asked them to taste something and it turned out to be unpleasant, how would they handle it?
  29. Do they wear underwear?
  30. Can they pee in front of other people?
  31. What story gave them nightmares as a child?
  32. How would they respond to being handed an infant?
  33. How would they respond to being asked to watch over a child for an afternoon?
  34. Do they enjoy climbing trees?
  35. In which of their own skill sets do they have the most confidence? Why?
  36. Do they enjoy receiving compliments? How do they respond to it?
  37. How often are they the one to initiate physical contact?
  38. Do they prefer salty or sweet things?
  39. Do they get the urge to jump from high places?
  40. Have they every written a dirty letter and actually sent it?
  41. How would they describe their love life?
  42. How would they describe their sex life?
  43. Do they hide objects? What and where?
  44. What are their reasons for getting up in the morning (outside of achieving their main goal)?
  45. Who is their greatest confidant? Who confides in them?
  46. What is something they’ve always wanted to do, but know they shouldn’t?
  47. Is there someone whose laugh makes them laugh as well?
  48. How festive are they on holidays?
  49. How would they respond to their ears ringing for an extended period of time?
  50. How likely is it that they would be the first to point out a full moon or a beautiful sunset?

Little Wolf

Anon asked: Can you do an imagine where Emma finds her little foster sister (reader) in Neverland? Like she’s a tough scrappy little thing and fights the lost boys to save Henry and Emma refuses to leave her side.

Warning: Peter (crazy) Pan is in here , and he is obsessed with you, yes I do think that peter is a warning , because he’s basically aN OLD MAN IN A CHILD’S BODY ¿¡HOW DISTURBING IS THAT?! VERY.

(A/N): So I get a little carried away so it’s pretty long, and the worst part is that the end sucks , BUT i can make a part two involving Ingrid and that whole mess, just send a plot! :D

Pairing: Emma x Sister!Reader and a slightly little bit of Reader x Peter

Words: 3899

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anonymous asked:

Top 5 video games I should download?

oh okay hmm here’s some indie stuff since most people probably know about the major studio games:

  • oxenfree, it’s about a group of kids that go to an island for a party and weird things start happening, if you liked life is strange you’ll like this although there’s no gay content™ in oxenfree
  • gone home, you explore and unveil a story in a house about the people living there, namely your sister and her girlfriend. it’s a bit scary though and plays with horror tropes so if you want some happy gays but don’t like scary stuff this maybe isn’t the game for you 
  • we know the devil, a short visual novel with a few different endings about kids at a weird summer camp. very gay.
  • kentucky route zero, it’s hard to explain, it’s a point and click adventure where you’re like a trucker but lot’s of weird magical realism type stuff happens. for fans of wtnv and alice isn’t dead!
  • virginia, not sure what this is about either but it’s very twins peak/x-files esque. idk there’s a lot of interesting stuff happening like there’s no dialogue in the game and jump cuts and stuff like that. i like it even though i didn’t understand most of it.

ask me my top five anything!

50 questions
  • 1. least favorite song?
  • 2. favorite type of dog?
  • 3. least favorite scent?
  • 4. mustard or mayonnaise?
  • 5. hotdogs or burgers?
  • 6. favorite type of melon?
  • 7. ever eaten playdough?
  • 8. what was one weird thing you ate as a kid?
  • 9. favorite number?
  • 10. favorite dwarf from snow white?
  • 11. what do you think is/would be the hardest language to learn?
  • 12. strangest word you can think of?
  • 13. four jobs you would never want?
  • 14. which color do you never wear?
  • 15. what's your least favorite thing to go shopping for?
  • 16. what's you favorite body part?
  • 17. any weird traditions in your family?
  • 18. what is your most irrational fear?
  • 19. favorite internet friend?
  • 20. dumbest movie you've ever seen?
  • 21. favorite season?
  • 22. worst grade you've ever gotten?
  • 23. What's your (full) name?
  • 24. highest floor you've ever been on?
  • 25. what's the longest you've gone without sleep?
  • 26. what did you want to be when you grew up?
  • 27. what's the longest you've ever grown your hair?
  • 28. favorite toast topping?
  • 29. most disgusting food combination?
  • 30. left or right handed?
  • 31. ever accidentally injured someone else?
  • 32. most embarrassing thing you've done/said when you were drunk?
  • 33. favorite foreign food?
  • 34. ever been banned from a public place?
  • 35. ever destroyed a library book?
  • 36. most money you've ever had in your bank account?
  • 37. most jumps on a pogo stick?
  • 38. favorite fastfood chain?
  • 39. favorite german/french/whatever term?
  • 40. are you a hat person?
  • 41. how much did you weigh at birth?
  • 42. least favorite boys name?
  • 43. least favorite girls name?
  • 44. favorite boys name?
  • 45. favorite girls name?
  • 46. do you know what bread pudding is? have you ever tried it? what's your opinion on it?
  • 47. if you could change your ethnicity/where you were born, what would you change it to?
  • 48. have you ever stolen anything?
  • 49. would you rather be cremated or buried?
  • 50. have you ever donated to a charity? if so, how much? what charity?
Watching Doug Out/The Good Lars for the first time


Doug Out

-Oh hey, Doug’s Connie’s father ain’t he?

-Are we in for some background character building?

-(Yay theme!)

-”–sneaking out right past a pair of intergalactic tyrants!”

-The Diamonds are tyrants confirmed, idk what to do with this, we already knew it anyway

-Doug was a cop?

-”How’s my swashbuckling swashbuckler doing?”
 Is he a fan of pirates?

-”You okay there, Steven?”
 “Oh, yeah, I love it down here.”
 me when my soul is down burning in hell

-Oh, he works for a private security company.


-Doug is much less strict than I remember.

-”They get younger every year.”
 what even

WHOA you guys did NOT just reference Carmen Sandiego and Mario

-W O W   A   F L A S H L I G H T

Okay, I don’t think you should point your flashlight straight up at the sky and tell every potentially dangerous criminal that you’re there

-”Do not attempt to make yourself a corn dog!”

-”Oh no, the laws of physics!”


-I’m so sorry

-Ow. Flashlights are heavy.

-Some of them anyway.

-What the fuck?? Onion?? Your shadow was too buff?

Different sized head, different build. Good logic Connie, but no.

-Doug, be careful for what you wish for, and also, it’s easy money if you get paid for telling kids to stop loitering around.



The Good Lars

-”Be honest, but not TOO honest.”

-Lars is a bit tsundere.

-”That’s his way of saying thanks.”
 “I know, I speak Lars.”

-b i n g o   b o n g o

-That’s gonna haunt Lars’s memory for the rest of his life

-the fuck is a bake delaska


-hoLY SHIT Lars is good at cooking what the FUCK


-”open up about your feeeeliiinnngssssss”

-Steven you’re creepy


-The most sophisticated thing I can cook is ramen, dude you’re fucking gifted

-”Somewhere in between learning to summon my shield, and finding out my mom is a war criminal.”

-This kid once sang a weird rap verse bout cookie cats

-Bucks brought assorted fruit…

-Okay then…

-Oh shucks, something’s happened to Lars, hasn’t it?

Looks like he can use his floating powers more freely now

-Actually he did that in Doug Out too, but I was too lazy to point it out…

-”This is Lars. Leave a message.”
 He doesn’t even care



Wish I could just randomly come up with songs like that, also that painting looks like Rose but it’s probably not

-I can’t even hear Buck’s guitar??

what a waste of food

-Did Sadie use to have a scar on her face? My memories glitching, fading, idk…

-Horror movie cliche of walking into the darkened streets alone…



Tony had just wanted to be sure his son protégé wasn’t getting in over his head. He hadn’t expected to find this!


“And how did this even happen! Happy, you’re supposed to be watching the kid!”

“Hey, I told the kid to stay away when he first ran into Deadpool. He never brought him up again so I figured he’d actually listened for once.”

“The kid never listens!”

“Are we still just going along with the kid not being Tony’s?”


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