you have to take responsibility

Someone: hey just because you’re mentally ill doesn’t mean you have the right to abuse others … you have to take responsibility for your actions. I know it’s hard, I’ve been there myself, but we can’t just harm others and expect to get away with it by blaming it on our disorder(s)

Someone else, inevitably: wtf kind of neurotypical bullshit is this lol

anonymous asked:

But just as easy as you explained it to me, they could explain to their audience they don't want to be fetishized and act out fantasies for people. The straight couples get just as many demands of "kiss, marry, have a baby!" and have just as much gossip written about their relationships but ignore it and do their own things individually too. Dan and Phil could be trailblazers, their relationship shuts down so many stereotypes about gay relationships!

(re: this post)

You guys should have baby! and Please take on the responsibility of trailblazing and eradicating stereotypes for an entire generation of young youtube-viewing audience are very different kinds of pressure. 

Not everyone wants to be a trail blazer. Some people just want to live their lives in peace, doing their job, and not having to quadruple think every single thing they put on camera or out into the world because they know they’re being judged as role models even if they didn’t ask for that responsibility. (Particularly given that Dan has been pretty open about his mental health/anxiety and how detrimental some kinds of pressure placed on himself already are, without even adding that to the mix.)

anonymous asked:

Hey one thing you need to realize and IM NOT DEFENDING BEIBER but he doesn't actually run his own twitter account. And I'm pretty sure he didn't take credit for he Despacito but anyway, continuar xxx

Yeah, i know. But as an artist you need to take responsability of things that have your name, you know? I’m not talking about everything, but at least social media. Artist make mistakes and saying stuff like “is not them, is another person” (even if its true) in situations like this are weak excuses. He’s an adult. He needs to say ‘hey, this is not cool’ even if it’s for his image, lmao. Considering that he was rude in other occasions to our people/culture, is not a surprise.

It feels like he takes the credit. I mean, not even acknowledge luis fonsi or daddy yankee? That’s just rude. Even when the latin media/latines called him out, he didn’t give any explanation. so. yeah.

I don’t know….what do you mean by “continuar”..it’s wrong..it’s “continue” or “continua”….that sounds like google translate? yeah. it literally is. don’t do that. 

stop excusing abusive behaviour with “im mentally ill!” ESPECIALLY the “why do you hate mentally ill people” shit. you are a huge reason as to why we are often seen as inherently abusive. you don’t get a pass because you’re mentally ill. you can EXPLAIN your behavior but excusing your abusive behavior is almost a little abusive in itself. no one will be less traumatized because their abuser is mentally ill. yes, i know, it sucks being mentally ill and can affect our relationships but you don’t get a pass. you have to reflect on your actions and take responsibility for them.

Even if they say “they didn’t mean it”, they’re still responsible for what they did.

Even if they say “they don’t remember it”, they’re still responsible for what they did.

Even if they say “you’re delusional, I would never do that, you made it up”, they’re still responsible for what they did, and for trying to gaslight and invalidate your memories.

Even if they say “I didn’t do it, and even if I did, I would be right to do it”, they’re still guilty for what they did.

Even if they have excuses, they’re still responsible for what they did.

Even if they act like it would have been crazy to expect from them to act any different way, they’re still responsible for what they did to you.

Even if they come at you with an entire agenda of how you should perceive what they did so it actually “benefits you”, even if they insist they did it for your own good, they’re still responsible for what they did to you, and for lying about it.

Even if they cry about how much it pains them to be accused of hurting you, they’re still responsible for what they did to you.

Even if they cry about how much they love you and how they did it all out of love and never meant to hurt you, it’s still their responsibility for what they did to you.

Even if they act like what they did shouldn’t have hurt you and you’re the one responsible for taking damage, for being sensitive to being abused, it’s still their responsibility for what they did to you.

Even if they blame you for what they did to you, they’re still responsible for what they did.

Even if they insist someone else did it to them too, even if they insist they had it worse than you, even if they say it’s a cultural thing, they’re still responsible for what they did to you.

Even if it was long ago, and they act like you’re wrong for remembering such old wrong doing, it’s still something they did, and they’re still responsible for doing it.

They can lie and deny and accuse and blame and invalidate and gaslight. It doesn’t absolve them of responsibility for what they did. It doesn’t absolve them from guilt.

Nothing can absolve abusers from responsibility for their own actions. Nothing.

Dear Muslim women, 

. You do not have to explain yourself

. You do not have to put up with Islamophobes- you tell them to fuck off 

. You shouldn’t have to defend yourself 

. You can be a feminist, LGBTQIA+ and anything else you want to be

. You have a nationality, a culture, an ethnicity-you are an individual and have your own unique identity 

. You don’t owe anyone any explanations- they can go do the research themselves

. The social and political issues of another country that is not your own have absolutely NOTHING to do with you- you shouldn’t be forced to feel the weight of their problems  

. You shouldn’t have to feel any guilt, apologise or feel pressured to take responsibility because some other Muslim committed a crime (even the ones who falsely claim to do it for religion) 

. You should be able to feel proud of your religion 

. You have the right to practice your religion 

. You have the right to be safe 


Muslim women are not punching bags for bigots. 

I wish fandom would stop framing issues of content as policing and frame it as a matter of responsibility for content creators 

fandom isn’t some space where you can do whatever nor is it a space where you can actively disregard your fellow fans’ well being 

if you create content it’s your responsibility to be aware of what messages you’re putting out into the world and yeah you do have to deal with it if it’s damaging content 

if you create misogynistic content, it’s not policing when someone says your work is misogynistic 

if you create racist content, it’s not policing when someone says your work is racist 

and that’s just like super basic I would hope someone has learned to call that shit out shitty messages you can put into your content 

there are plenty of areas of grey and mires of shit you can get into but if you’re willing to say what you create for fandom is meaningful you have to take responsibility for whatever shit you create and step in and you need to be critical of what you do and what fandom trends you choose to be apart of 

have some respect for your work and fellow fans by not acting like someone just decided to shout at you when you stepped on their toes first 

plenty of sad and dark things are dealt with through creative content and maybe all you need to do so you don’t hurt somebody is tag

sometimes you need to realize that promoting or writing something in general is harmful to other fans and you need to not post or share your work publically

the things you create are not just fantasy things you put out on the internet and then have no affect on anyone and float about in a vacuum, they’re not fantasies if you’re sharing them as content, and they can hurt and offend others and you need to be aware of and responsible for the hurt you cause 

maybe a good rule of thumb is if you would criticize a published content creator for creating what you’re creating maybe you shouldn’t do it either

Seventeen as the Mafia + How He Met You

||| Requested by @dreamiedragon |||


S.Coups/Choi Seungcheol

Originally posted by sevixxteen

  • That type of leader that doesn’t take shit from anyone, except his members because he can’t fight them all at once. 
  • Gets to know and observes people for a long time before recruiting them
  • He’s very stressed lately as they are a relatively new gang and there are a lot of fights going on with others for territories.

He met you in one these fights when you tried to make a distraction for your gang. You were about to go upstairs to the roof when you bumped into him

“Who the hell are you?” he asked immediately taking his gun out and pointing it at you.

“The same goes for you. You’re not from my gang so I’m here to kill you.”

“Oh really.” he asked smacking the gun from your hand and getting your hands behind your back. “You chose the wrong member. You see I’m the boss and now I can use you as a hostage.”


Yoon Jeonghan

Originally posted by visual-17

  • Looks like an angel and he actually is but in reality he’s the one you should be afraid of the most.
  • Nobody has seen him kill anybody because his methods are too cruel to do them in public.
  • Apparently has some beef with EXO’s Sehun. No one dares ask him but it has something to do with Sehun mistaking him for somebody.

By accident you got involved in a weapon dealing incident with him and he has been planing on killing you ever since. You were good at hiding your tracks but he saw you one day in the city and decided to get rid of you just there in the street but then realized that this fight would probably end up in a blood bath so instead he approached you in secret.

“You have to keep quite and come with me, if you don’t want to die here.” he said pressing his gun to your back.


Joshua/Hong Jisoo

Originally posted by jihanlife

  • Nobody knows why he’s in the gang as he was never invited.
  • When Seungcheol first noticed Jisoo he thought he’s a spy or something (as he appeared out of nowhere) and was about to kill him when he promised that he’s good at at least something
  • And he was, to everyone’s surprise Jisoo’s aim and accuracy is the best out of all of them that’s why he prefers snipers.

He was told to get rid of you silently but you noticed him at the last second and he missed the shot causing a massive panic in the street. You used this opportunity to escape which made Jisoo even more angry. He hasn’t missed a shot in a long time and was determined to get you for that. But whenever he thought he got you cornered he somehow managed to miss and after a while he started to enjoy this little game of yours and soon realized that he doesn’t even want to kill you anymore.


Jun/Wen Junhui

Originally posted by jisoos-princess

  • Pro at hand to hand combat.
  • Trains all the members and teaches them different fighting techniques just in case.
  • His training routine is no joke and everyone is practically dead after it.

He met you before he joined the gang. You were jogging at the same park every morning. As it was really early and not a lot of people were out it became like a habit for him to greet you before he ran past. Eventually he wanted to engage in not only small talk and find out more about you and he started slowing down every single day till he was running at the same pace as you.

“Finally decided to slow down?” you asked.

“Only for you.” he winked.


Hoshi/Kwon Soonyoung

Originally posted by fyhoshi

  • Experimented a lot and finally came up with his own method to make drugs.
  • They were incredibly popular and so he quickly went up the ranks and now whenever there is deal going on it has to go through him first.
  • His first idea was to make poison but he somehow made drugs so nowadays he likes mixing different ingredients to try to create a new deadly weapon.

You had the audacity to attempt to take his throne as the king of drug dealing. You were stubborn and despite a lot of orders to report what you’re doing, you made your way around and stole half of his clients. He had enough and thought that the easiest way to fix this problem would be to get rid of you. But he had no idea you thought the same thing and somehow got his whole warehouse blown up. He caught you outside.

“You little shit, now you will have to take responsibility and I’m not letting you go any time soon.”


Jeon Wonwoo

Originally posted by visual-17

  • Likes money. A lot. And doesn’t like sharing. At all.
  • Easiest way for him to get rich was cards that’s why he started gambling at a really young age and now is a pro at it and is amazing at bluffing.
  • Enjoys tricking his own gang members and actually gets the most money out of them.

Played poker with him once. He lost. Now he wants his money back but you keep denying his challenge. He usually shows up at the most random places just to ask you. You got into your car and almost spilled your coffee when you noticed him sitting in the back seat.

“Wonwoo what the fuck?”

“Come on Y/N, let’s play.”

“Can you get over that already? Get the hell out of my car.”

“I guess I have to take some more drastic measures.” he said taking his gun out. “We’re going to my place.”


Kim Mingyu

Originally posted by fuckyeahmingyu

  • Can smuggle anything in and out starting from stolen cars and ending with guns.
  • Doesn’t stay in the city for too long as he always has deals all around the country.
  • But when he comes back everyone is extremely happy to see him as he’s mostly chill and just being near him calms the others down.

He met you when he was away on a trip. You asked him for help when your car broke down and he fell in love at first sight. He stayed in the city for more than two months just to keep seeing you and you eventually became good friends when Seungcheol was done with him ignoring his orders and went to get him back himself. Well Mingyu obviously didn’t want to leave you but you didn’t want to go to another city either so he decided to be blunt.

“Y/N I don’t know how you feel about me but love you so I’m sorry but you have only two choices, you either go with me on your own free will or I take you by force.”

 

Woozi/Lee Jihoon

Originally posted by seungcheofine

  • Somehow the ones who look the most innocent are the most dangerous in this gang. The same goes for Woozi. But he only uses violence when it’s necessary.
  • His specialty - torture. Favourite methods - teeth and fingernails pulling.
  • He charms his targets with his cute appearance and then gets every last bit of information they can muster.

You were unfortunate enough to be his target. You were screaming in pain for at least and hour, swearing that you don’t know anything when Seungcheol came in and told him that they got the wrong person. He set his tools aside and stood in silence for a few minutes.

“Fuck!” he shouted shoving everything from the table. You just watched in horror not knowing what’s going to happen next. He turned around and untied you. He was ashamed of himself and couldn’t look you in the eyes.

“At least let me treat you your wounds.”


DK/Lee Seokmin

Originally posted by livinthediamondlife

  • Is responsible for looking after the gang territories and making sure they don’t get taken over.
  • Usually doesn’t think twice when someone trespasses and just shoots them on the spot.
  • But still has incredibly good and friendly relationships with the residence of the areas he’s taking care of.

Trying to bypass through his territories was a big mistake. He noticed you’re not a local and decided to find out what you’re doing here. 

“Hey you!” he called you over but you just looked at him and started running. 

“What the heck?!” he thought as he started chasing you. You didn’t know the streets well and ended up in a dead end.

“I got you cornered. Now you’re going to tell me what you’re doing here or I will have to use violence.”


The8/Xu Minghao

Originally posted by mountean

  • He’s great at annoying and pissing everybody off easily but it’s hard to catch him as he’s incredibly fast.
  • That’s why they send him when their is a need to infiltrate, spy or track anybody.
  •  That doesn’t always work out as he likes to make either a grand entrance or exit and by doing that he attracts the attention of anybody nearby.

He was following you to get some information when he lost you. Suddenly he felt a knife press into his back.

“Why are you after me? Who hired you?”

He tried to take you by surprise by turning around and taking the knife out of your hands but he lost his balance and fell on top of you.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” you asked.

“Well this is quite the unfortunate situation you got yourself in.” he smirked. “If you promise not to make a scene our meeting won’t take long.”


Boo Seungkwan

Originally posted by infinitblaq

*Jun shows up out of nowhere*

  • One of the first members who joined and everybody is thankful for that every single day because they wouldn’t have got where they are without him.
  • The missions he plans have a 99% chance of success.
  • Failure is not an option for him so he makes detailed strategies for all type of possible scenarios.

What a surprise You showed up at the wrong place at the wrong time and ruined all his perfect planing. The members haven’t seen him this pissed in a long time when he grabbed you and almost dragged you to one of the rooms. He roughly pushed you inside and you almost tripped on your own legs but his gentleman side couldn’t let a lady fall in front of him even when he was angry so he caught you midair and watched how confused you became by the second.

“Sit.” he said pulling you up and pointing you to the chair. “We have to talk.”


Hansol Vernon

Originally posted by sneezes

  • Knows anything and everything and the others should learn from him how to get verified information as fast as he gets.
  • Good with electronics that’s why he never goes anywhere without his trusted computer.
  • Despite some members protests he tends to sell the rarest info for big amounts of money to the other gangs.

He find out about you when he wanted to sell some info but the gang told him they already have what they need. Surprised that somebody besides him found it, he was determined to track you down. He was even more shocked when he saw that you’re a woman as there was not a lot of them in the industry.

“What? You think only men can do this type of work?”

“No but I find the women who do incredibly sexy.”


Dino/Lee Chan

Originally posted by dino-net

  • Despite being the youngest he knew about the mafia world the most.
  • His father had a gang and was killed during a deal so he asked Seungcheol for help to someday avenge him.
  • Takes all advice given to him very seriously and tries his best to help.

Some trusted former members of his father gang were asked to take care of him so that’s why you followed him and also joined this gang. He found this annoying as he wanted to escape his past and always treated you harshly but when he noticed that you’re not around anymore he got kind of sad. But to his delight you came back after a few weeks after taking care of business.

“Missed me?” You smirked.

“Please don’t ever do that again.” he said, giving you a surprise hug.


A/N: I wonder if I should make a masterlist but I’m so lazyyy… Anyhow, feel free to request more scenarios, reactions etc. I keep up with a lot of groups, both male and female!! 😄

at some point you have to sit with yourself and learn who you are. you have to take responsibility for the way you’ve been treating yourself and the way you’ve allowed others to break you down. you have to go back to wherever you abandoned your love for self - thinking that someone’s love for you is more important than your own - and pick you back up! you have to ask yourself, “why do I treat others better than I treat my own self?” then you have to accept yourself.. because at the end of the day, the only person who’s forced to deal with the broken pieces of you, is you. don’t fault yourself for any of the past - just accept who you are today. accept your truths, your hurt, and your heart. and finally, you have to love YOU. love every piece of you - and never ever let anyone come in and damage you again. Heal your heart and Protect yourself better.
—  Reyna Biddy
Why people get trapped by Emotional Abusers & Why it’s not their fault

(these apply to platonic and romantic relationships)

1. Attachment

The Emotional Abuser gives you attention: they make you feel flattered, loved and important. You start to believe that they genuinely care about you. They might even think that they do by themselves since they internally justify all their doings. Normally this kind of attachment would lead to a healthy bonding and a closer relationship. With the Emotional Abuser it leads to some levels of addiction and dependency on the victim’s part which is never their fault. Emotional Abuser’s behaviour exploits normal emotional bonding to another human being.

2. Guilt

In some point in the relationship you notice that it’s all about their needs. The Abuser might do something that hurts your feelings and bringing it up leads them to reason why it’s actually your fault and why you have to take responsibility for it. They make up convincing excuses why it’s not their job to do it, why it’s absolutely unreasonable of you to ask for it and so on. In other words: they Guilt-trip you. The Emotional Abuser believes they have no responsibility for their behaviour or feelings. If they feel uncomfortable by something in the relationship they will manipulate you to take the blame instead of trying to work things out. Guilt-tripping makes the victim submit and erodes their sense of emotional and physical boundaries since they are made to believe it’s their job to cater on Abuser’s needs.

3. Cognitive dissonance

After the idealization pace the Emotional Abuser will move to a devaluing pace. Catering to their needs is not enough anymore and you feel you can’t do anything right no matter what you do. The pace starts when the Abuser feels you are getting emotionally too close and/or you are trying to hold them accountable for something they have done. Emotional Abusers are afraid of responsibility and in some cases intimacy so they will try to push you away. They use manipulation: Gaslighting and Guilt-tripping to force you into silence and to take all the responsibility for the relationship. They give you Silent Treatment which is justified by some clever excuses. Emotional Abusers believe they are entitled to absolute emotional comfort even when it means abusing other people.

Because you remember how well they used to treat you, your mind has a hard time accepting they are not the person you thought they were. In fact you might start to make excuses for them in your head because they have manipulated you to think nothing is their fault. It is extremely difficult to get away from the Abuser’s emotional trap because they take advantage of the victim’s emotional bonding to them and give false hope that the relationship could be “fixed”. You are misled into thinking that if you just learn not to be so “needy” and “selfish”, the Abuser will reward you with the loving behaviour they demonstrated in the beginning.

Aftermath

The Emotional Abuser has no intention to take responsibility for what their abusive behaviour has caused you because they have normalized and justified it in their head. Not all of the Abusers are so sure of themselves but need a lot of internal convincing and validation from others so that they can feel good about themselves which is their goal: not having to deal with responsibility or emotional labour. After all Emotional Abusers are not Disney villains but people who are so selfish that they lack of motivation to learn how to not hurt people.

There are two ways how the trap can break: the victim quits all contact with the Abuser or the Abuser leaves the victim. The latter one occurs if the Emotional Abuser feels they have to deal with too much because of the victim. The Abuser might feel threatened by the victim if the victim is making the Abuser feel bad about themself by calling out their abusive behaviour. The Emotional Abuser thinks that they are actually the victim in the relationship because the real Victim is making them feel bad and scared. The Abuser is genuinely afraid that they would have to deal with negative emotions that taking responsibility would require.

In the end the Emotional Abuser ends the relationship with some dramatic note in which they project all their feelings into the victim: you are the abuser, you have harmed them, you have threatened them. This is their way of securing their own emotional well-being as they refuse to acknowledge the reality. Just remember that it was NOT your fault and you are not responsible for their horrible behaviour. While mutually harmful and violent relationships can exist abusive relationships are based on a power imbalance and therefore there is no such a thing as “mutually abusive”. You are nothing like your abuser.

ew.com
'The New Mutants' Details Revealed: X-Men Franchise Goes Horror
Director Josh Boone on the ‘very, very different’ Maisie Williams X-Men project

The New Mutants, the long anticipated X-Men spinoff movie, is going to be a comic book film that goes in an unusual direction. “We are making a full-fledged horror movie set within the X-Men universe,” director Josh Boone says. “There are no costumes. There are no supervillains. We’re trying to do something very, very different.”

The New Mutants, which was created by Chris Claremont in the early ’80s, is about a group of teenage mutants, a kind of superheroes-in-training, who must learn to control their powers. When artist Bill Sienkiewicz — whom Boone calls “one of the most amazing comic book artists ever” — came aboard for No. 18 in 1984, the series took a turn for what Boone describes as, “a darker and more surreal and impressionistic X-Men series than we’d ever seen before. It felt like Stephen King meets John Hughes.”

It’s this run of the comic that inspired what we’ll see in The New Mutants which is currently scheduled for a spring 2018 release (and shooting for a PG-13 rating). Boone is keeping mum on actual plot details, but a source close to the project explained how mutants are at their most dangerous (both to themselves and others) when their powers are new. (Like, say, their teenage years!) Says the source: “Held in a secret facility against their will, five new mutants have to battle the dangers of their powers, as well as the sins of their past. They aren’t out to save the world — they’re just trying to save themselves.”

“We love that Fox wants to make all these different X-Men spinoffs as drastically different as they can.”

Boone wants to assure fellow fans that he’s one of them and that he’s taking this responsibility very, very seriously. “You can’t have a bigger nerd or fan making this. It’s so important to me. I’m not the 12-year-old who decided to write Stephen King a letter and loved Marvel Comics anymore, but I try to hold myself accountable to that kid. Because that kid is what keeps me from becoming a Hollywood whore,” he says with a laugh.

iamnmbr3  asked:

Is it just me or is there a disconnect between how Tony is portrayed in CW and how Marvel treats his portrayal in that movie? Like, when I watched it for the first time, I thought he was clearly in the wrong and acting in an unjustifiable manner. Same for other people who have watched it with me. But then I feel like a lot of Marvel people act as though it was "morally ambiguous situation" or as though "both sides were right" or whatever when that really, really was not the case AT ALL.

Oh I totally 100% agree with this. Like i get that they had to be kinda on the fence about it bc the concept of getting people to choose a side is what drove the marketing campaign, but from the way they were talking i was like hmm will i be swayed? Instead I walked into the room 100% Team Cap and somehow left the cinema even more Team Cap than before I saw the movie. I’d put this under a read more but it’s 3am and I’m on mobile so apologies, bc it’s gonna be long. I have a lot of things to say on this topic.

There was nothing morally ambiguous about it. There was no “both sides were right and wrong and it’s hard to choose”, like that mentality makes no sense to me. Or rather it does make sense, but I wish it didn’t.

Steve’s stance in this movie regarding the accords was about taking responsibility for your own actions. About having the power to choose only to use their enhanced abilities to help and do good. About owning the consequences of their actions if they choose to help. It was about not handing those consequences off to someone else. It was about not allowing people with agendas to potentially send them into a situation where they’re using there abilities to hurt rather than help. Which given what happened with SHIELD, you can’t exactly blame him for.

Tony’s stance regarding the accords was one that was much more driven by ego - something that drives a large amount of his decisions throughout the MCU at large as well as the rest of this film, as noted by Natasha. Tony felt guilty. He knew his choice to create Ultron against the suggestion of basically everyone is what led to the events in Sokovia. On top of that he gets cornered by a grieving mother who says she also blames him for the death of her son in Sokovia. Tony doesn’t want that guilt. He wants someone else to make the decisions for him. He wants someone else to say “yes you can be here” and “no you can’t go there” because that way, when things go well and they save the day with little to no casualties they get to be the heroes, they get the press. And we know Tony loves to be the showman, he loves the attention, bc as previously mentioned - he’s driven by ego. However when things do go wrong, he can appease his conscience by saying “I didn’t choose to be here, you gave me the order to be here, that choice was yours, that responsibility is on your shoulders.” - He wants the glory with none of the responsibility. He also wants the accords to cut down his workload so Pepper will come back to him. He literally says that. Tony stans are super quick to call Steve selfish for helping Bucky, but conveniently ignore the fact Tony says that Pepper left him bc he was spending too much time focused on the suits and being Iron Man, and he hoped the accords would give him a medium between the two so he could fix that.

And then there’s Steve and Bucky. I cannot physically wrap my head around the idea that people call Steve’s actions in this movie selfish. Especially given where Bucky ends up at the end of this movie. Steve’s actions were not dictated by the simple fact he wanted his friend back. They were dictated by the fact that no one else was trying to help him. No one else believed there was any world in which Bucky was innocent. No one else was trying to look out for him. And when has Steve ever done anything but look out for the little guy, the underdog? Even when he was the little guy, he was still looking out for anyone without someone in their corner. Had Steve made any choices different to the ones he had, Bucky would have died. Had he let someone else go to Bucharest to get him, Bucky would have been shot on sight, despite not being guilty. The government laughed at the idea of even giving Bucky a lawyer, they’d already decided his guilt, so had Steve handed Bucky over when Tony demanded, Bucky would have been given a trial by people that had decided his fate and already believed him a traitor to his country. He wasn’t being selfish, he was trying to save a life that no one else thought was worth saving.

Tony was so caught up in his stance being right, he didn’t even register that Steve had stopped even fighting about the Accords. When they met at the airport Tony was still there about the accords and about bringing them in, and he would not back down from that. Steve wasn’t there about that. And he told Tony this. He told him that Bucky hadn’t been the one behind the UN attack. He told him who actually was. He told him about the other soldiers in Siberia. He told him about Zemo travelling there and the danger posed if he activated 5 Winter Soldiers. He told him that he needed to get there before that happened. Steve was trying to do his job as an Avenger, to help people. Tony was too caught up in his own need to be right to realise that. Tony was willing to let all that shit happen rather than admit he was wrong.

And then at the end. When Zemo plays the video of The Winter Soldier killing his parents. Tony stans try and justify his reaction by saying it was instinctive. That he reacted to seeing the guy who killed his parents in front of him. But Tony stans just see what they want to see instead of what was actually there. Tony’s reaction was not to Bucky. His reaction was to Steve. He saw the video and he didn’t react. He asked Steve if he’d known, and when Steve says he hadn’t known it was him, he asks him again. And when Steve admits he had known, that’s when Tony reacts. That’s when Tony goes for Bucky. Which the writers have said was Tony recognising Bucky was the thing Steve loved most, and wanting to take it from him to hurt him for not telling him. He knows it wasn’t Bucky that killed his parents, he acknowledges it more than once, but he doesn’t care.

And Tony gets away with it. He gets excused for it. He breaks the rules of the accords he was so strongly in support of, and he gets off scot free. Meanwhile Sam and Clint and Scott and Wanda are locked in an underground prison cell. And it’s because Tony is the epitome of both White Male Privilege and Money Can’t Buy Everything But It Can Buy Anything. He’s rich, he’s powerful, he’s white, he’s male, and that means he does shitty things and gets away with it. He doesn’t have to worry about the consequences of his actions because his consequences are never so severe he can’t buy his way out.

You remember in Captain America: The First Avenger, Erskine says to Steve “A strong man, who has known power all his life may lose respect for that power. But a weak man knows the value of strength, and knows compassion”? Apply that to Tony and Steve in this movie because it explains the way they behave perfectly. Tony is the first man described. He grew up in wealth, he grew up in a powerful family with a powerful name, he always had privilege, and now in this film he wants to use that privilege to pass off the responsibility that comes with his power. Steve is the second guy. Who was the little guy, who had to fight for everything he got. Who lived majority of his life as the little guy, and even with his bigger body and new abilities, still has the mindset of the little guy. Still knows and remembers all too well what it was like not to have any sort of power at all, and how important it is to use that power to help the best way you can. And knows you have to be respectful of everything that comes with that power, including taking responsibility for it.

That was longer than i thought it would be so tl;dr - i agree, there was a HUGE disconnect between the marketing of it vs the reality of it in the film.

PLUTO

If the Sun is our ego, then Pluto, the planet farthest from the Sun, is our subconscious. It is often associated with death, destruction, hidden truths, obsession and other hard to grasp concepts. Away from the light, this planet seem to work in mysterious ways and many fear the effects it has on one’s chart. However, Pluto, at its core, represents transformation. The cycle of life: death and rebirth, destruction and creation…Change. When we are at our lowest, Pluto offers us a second chance to redeem ourselves, to examine what we tried to bury and to evolve.

Ok So

You mentioned that you wanted to know more about majors like engineering to get a feel for how the Fair Folk would interact with them. I have no idea if this is useful on that front, but, there’s a thing in Canada called The Ritual of the Calling of an Engineer. There’s a ceremony when you graduate with your degree, with the ritual words all written out by a poet, and you swear to have humility and take responsibility in your work, and are given an iron ring to wear on the pinky finger of your dominant hand. The ring has flat facets, so it will scrape across a page as you write or draw, to remind you you are wearing it. Optionally, a ring can be passed down from a mentor to a student.

The practice was started after a catastrophic collapse of a railway bridge due to a failure of oversight - something the engineers should have noticed, but overlooked. At the heart of it is a promise and an understanding that the work an engineer does - as dry and technical and by-the-book as it sometimes seems - holds human lives in balance. It is the work of taking scientific discovery and carving it into something useful, building out of all these separate pieces the accomplishments that change the world. There is a rush to having that kind of power, to holding the scope of human accomplishment in your hands. But you have to be careful. To not promise more than you can safely deliver, or pay a price.

I think there is something there that would be very appealing to the fae, though also terrifying to them, as these are the people who build fire and iron into every part of the world and make it inhospitable to them. The parallel of temptation and fear is so strong that the text of the ceremony could be a pledge to avoid deals with the fae literally without changing a word: the first line of the pledge is “I, [name], in the presence of these my betters and my equals in my Calling, bind myself upon my Honour and Cold Iron, that … I will not henceforward suffer or pass… Bad Workmanship or Faulty Material in aught that concerns my works before mankind as an Engineer, or in my dealings with my own Soul before my Maker.”

A deal with the fae is nothing if not shoddy workmanship.

[a note - this is really mostly about structural and mechanical engineering. Skyscrapers and airplanes and bridges so long they have to bend to follow the curve of the Earth. Other kinds of engineering - electrical and chemical and bio and nanotech and so on - have different things going on.

And there is also the lightheartedness, the endless bureaucracy and contradictory regulations, the desperate light-night coffee-fueled fighting with a 3D printer that only squiggles out incomprehensible plastic monstrosities. There are the weird moments of the unreal hanging around daily life, like the way a layer of ordinary blue masking tape on the tray helps the 3D print go smoothly. Or the odd regulations in the safety codes that make you wonder if this system was even designed by humans. The person in the computer lab who untangles your desperate mess of a spreadsheet without even saying a full sentence to you. Or even the way so many experiments have to be run at night and underground - even if you know it’s because of background vibrations, it still feels a little bit magic.]

(Plover)


Thank you so much! This is exactly the kind of thing I meant - I had absolutely no idea and it would have been such a terrible missed opportunity to write anything about engineering without knowing things like this! (Also wow this is as much a love letter to engineering as canadianwheatpirates’s piece about statistics, and just as beautiful)

So - engineers are concerned above all else with the real, with the concrete and logical. There’s room in it for the fantastic, absolutely, for the beautiful, even; things that seem to defy what should be. But at the heart of it it’s iron and fire, like you said above - break it down, piece by piece, and you’ve got something constructed painstakingly from the bottom up by people aware of the weight this holds in every sense of the word. There’s no room in that for magic, or perhaps it would be more accurate to say that magic has less than no value here.

(But of course, being drawn to the incomprehensible is not solely a human trait.)

Sometimes I think about how strange and unpleasant it is that Tetra gets left behind in Hyrule Castle. Daphnes tells her that she’s the last descendant of the royal family, and then, having dropped this bomb, he orders her to remain right where she is. He takes Link back to the surface of the Great Sea, and Tetra is expected to stay there by herself, a brave but small girl in a creepy castle deep under the ocean.

Time may have stopped in Hyrule, but Tetra is still alive. There’s nothing for her to eat, there’s nothing for her to drink, there’s nowhere for her to rest, and I don’t even want to think about things like soap and toilet paper. This girl has spent her entire life going on adventures and searching for treasure and bossing around a group of pirates, but now she has nothing to do except sit and wait.

When Ganondorf shows up to kidnap her, Tetra is probably like, OKAY DUDE LET’S GO.

dosendumbledore  asked:

Bcuz all ships with Lup are totally not for fun at all. Do you ship for gold? Honor? Also. Taako isn't in a canon relationship with Krav. (ttazz) Shipping is always about fun. Every ship is. And it's not like taagnus is taking the gay representation away from you, is it? Taako is gay that's a fact and that's great!!! And if you dislike it please just blacklist. Sorry I just don't get how the hell that stuff is supposed to hurt anyone.

NON-MLM: READ AND REBLOG THIS POST

i can’t believe y’all are making me put up with this shit on the day of a new episode. way to ruin the good vibes. i told you not to contact me about that post unless i had said something problematic. you have only messaged me to derail my point and insult me. let me, as a gay man, break down why this subject is hurtful to gay men, and i fully expect you to listen and take this into consideration, because you have a responsibility to:

  • taako is in a canon relationship with kravitz. if that much wasn’t clear for you then you’re clearly not paying attention. i also emailed justin and he explicitly confirmed their relationship (which i linked in the post you are referring to): http://goodraandyy.tumblr.com/post/159312691739/justin-confirming-taako-and-kravitzs-relationship so don’t you DARE try to take that represenation away from me. you have no idea what it means to me and thousands of other gay boys in the fandom.
  • most shipping is about fun and that’s the fucking problem. lup shipping is for representation, but taako shipping is for “fun.” gay people do not exist for your FUN. they don’t exist for your ENTERTAINMENT. we are not toys that you can play with based on what you find “hot!!!”. it’s grossly fetishistic of gay men and it’s been going on for far too long. that kind of yaoi-obsessed fandom attitude is fucking disgusting, and just because you think it’s normal/harmless fun, doesn’t mean it is, and doesn’t mean i don’t have the right to speak up about it.
  • taagnus IS taking away gay representation because it’s reducing a canon gay relationship (taako/kravitz) back down to just a “ship” - a hypothetical happenstance that may or may not be canon, and quite frankly? i’m fucking tired of that. i’m tired of shipping, i’m tired of daydreaming about the idea of boys being in love being considered a normal and acceptable thing in media. i want it to be canon, i want it to be confirmed and undeniable, i want gay boys to be normal and not just fun little accessories for fandom fun!!!!!
  • blacklisting does nothing to fix the problem at hand. me ignoring this problem isn’t going to make it magically disappear. me blacklisting gross ships isn’t going to make people stop fetishizing gay men.

you absolutely CANNOT read a post i made as a gay man expressing how i was upset with how gay men are treated in the fandom, and then go on to ask me how i could be upset about it, when i vividly explained it in the post before. honestly? i am absolutely exhausted from putting up with this attitude from this fandom. i’ve tried to be kind and patient and educate y’all but apparently your hawt yaoiz is more important to you than the safety and happiness of gay men. either listen to what i have to say or leave me the fuck alone.

i dont know how to put this but if you’re someone who makes artistic content and you’re from the third world you do kind of? have a responsability to represent it in your work? like of course no one can force you to and you’re gonna do whatever the fuck you feel like doing but i keep arguing with my writer friends who set all their stories in idk fucking england don’t you think there are enough stories set in england? who’s gonna tell our stories? the british sure as fuck won’t.

also they shouldn’t because gross.

“Right actions in the future are the best apologies for bad actions in the past.”
- Tyron Edwards


Most of you have caught wind of accusations swarming this blog to be one in the same of gohliad’s. If you assumed that, you would be 100% right. I’m doing what should have been done instead of this chance for a fresh start fostered by alternate persona and ridiculous lies. I know it was wrong to put on a new face, and pretend to be someone else and run away like I have always done before, because that was always the easiest thing to do for me. I made this account out of fear, because I thought maybe no matter what I did that the community wouldn’t accept me no matter how much I’ve changed or am trying to… but that is just me again, being fearful, and not owning up to the things that have happened over the past couple years. That’s me being scared, and ashamed and embarrassed. Whether or not people accept me, or want to associate with me going forward is their right, and because of what has happened, I accept and understand that.

I’ve affected this community as a whole, and hurt people. I rejected the idea that what I do can influence other people, I neglected to take care of my mental health, I declined opportunities to correct my own behavior and make right with people and I even refused to take apologies from other people. Often I couldn’t even comprehend how others were affected by my aggressive ass and hostile behavior, because in my world “stuff on the internet didn’t matter” but that just isn’t true. We are all humans behind our avatars and screenshots. I was just so big headed I refused to accept that I wasn’t the only actual person behind a screen with a life and feelings. Over the past few months I’ve been lurking around, seeing what others said and all I’ve thought about is this community and how I put a giant nuclear dent in it, and it’s people. How some people are just upright scared of me, like I’m a ticking time bomb, and I don’t want anyone to feel that way. No one deserves to feel unsafe in the simblr community, and it sucks it took me feeling that way on my own to realize that. It took me several months of no social media, and a lot of behavioral therapy to understand that my actions matter, everything I do matters. I can’t act the way I have in the past, not on simblr, not in real life, not to anyone.

Nothing I say can change anything that has already been done because no matter what I say now, people have been hurt, and that never goes away. People I was close friends to, who are now enemies. People I don’t even know, too. I’ve deserved pretty much everything that has came to me so far, the burnbooks, the simsecrets, the bigger simblrs hating me, as well as the little ones, anonymous hate mail. Even when I didn’t deserve it, I never responded correctly, I never responded like someone who cared about anyone except my self. I’m sorry for literally everything, to anyone I’ve offended or hurt. I wish I could apologize to everyone individually, but I don’t want to trigger anyone because I know some people will be willing to turn a new leaf with me, and others will completely reject the notion. Either or, you have that right to feel that way, and I take full responsibility for any animosity you have towards me. If there is something I can do for you, if I’ve hurt you, or even if i haven’t, please let me know. And I will do my damn best to do it. You can take my word for it, or not but I am so healthy right now, and from here on out, I’m only going to do good for everyone around me. I want to bring you decent custom content, help you out with stuff (personal or creation) and be there for everyone the way everyone has been there for me. I don’t want to let my friends down, I don’t want to let me down, and I don’t want to let simblr down, not ever again. 

-Jade