you have earned my love

2

Worlds 2017

Post FD hug <3

10

every westallen scene ever (124/?)

4

a fever you can’t sweat out + opening lines

  • My Daughter: (after lashing out at me in anger) Dad, I don't know why you and Mom still love me.
  • Me: You don't understand. You do not have to earn my love. You have it, always, without conditions.
It pretty much turned into a fic... Sorry

Hi, so I’ve got a matsuhana headcanon! 🌻

In middle school, Matsukawa was much more quiet/reserved, only having a small group of class friends. He’s very funny/clever, but a bit awkward, preferring to digest and pick apart any new information thoughtfully. Conversations with his classmates always seem to move too quickly for him to keep up. (His timing is either spot on or completely off the wall.)
Maybe he really only had one close friend who “understood him” but they moved really far away after their first year of junior high. After that, during class breaks, and during his walks to and from school, Matsukawa always had his earbuds in. He plays music because he enjoys finding new music, but also because he’s lonely and he thinks no one really wants to talk to him (tween angst).
His 3rd year of middle school is better for him, he grew much taller over summer break and gets scouted for the volleyball club. He was apprehensive about joining at first, but once he tries it, he loves it! He really starts to open up again and his team becomes like a second family. When he finally graduates from middle school, Matsukawa has a great break, but the idea of having to start all over again at Aoba Johsai terrifies him.

Hanamaki has always been outspoken, if not a little bit snarky. (Puberty amplifies this x10) But his classmates generally like him anyways. They can always count on him to be honest. (Even if he is kind of a little shit in middle school.) He’s had the same friends his whole life since they all grew up in the same neighborhood. They all played on the same junior volleyball team, went to the same small Kindergarten-9th grade school where EVERYONE knows each other.
But somehow Hanamaki feels like many of his relationships are shallow.
He’s always loved being active and socializing, but sometimes it feels like he’s trapped in a boring bubble, where nothing new or exciting ever happens and everyone is “forced” to be civil. No one ever shares what they really think like he does and he finds that he has to hold himself back if he wants to fit in. Playing volleyball helps with this a little, (actions speak louder than words) but he can’t wait to graduate and move on to the much larger Aoba Johsai.

The first few days of high school pass by in a blur of confusion, ceremonies, and introductions. Both boys are nervous and excited, and so far their new school is even better than their expectations.

Matsukawa actually meets Iwaizumi on the very first day of school. After the entrance ceremony, Oikawa immediately got swarmed by a group of girls that wanted to get to know him. The crowd separates Iwaizumi from Oikawa, and he’s left to find his new classes by himself.
Matsukawa happens to witness this, and impulsively plucks up the courage to talk to (the very lost-looking/irritated) Iwaizumi. To his surprise, when they start to talk, Iwaizumi relaxes. They’re both glad to have someone to be with, and they find that they get along really well. They’re even in the same class together!

Hanamaki found his own classroom immediately and was one of the first people to find his desk. He greets some acquaintances of his as people trickle in, but he keeps to himself. That is, until Oikawa and his outrageously large flock of followers stumble through the door. The flock reluctantly says goodbye to the object of their newfound affections and they either take their seats or go back to their own classes. Oikawa waves goodbye and takes a seat near Hanamaki, ignoring his growing Cheshire grin, and Hanamaki can’t contain himself anymore. This ridiculous guy was looking extremely… Interesting. “Hey,” he taps his new neighbor’s desk with his fingers, “what the fuck was <i>that</i>?”
They both gain a very snarky love-hate relationship right then and there.

Oikawa, Hanamaki’s primary source of entertainment, always disappears from the classroom at lunchtime, so on the fourth day Hanamaki decides to tag along.

Oikawa unwillingly leads him to the class down the hall: Iwaizumi and Matsukawa’s class. Matsukawa and Iwaizumi also sit near each other, so they’re all becoming pretty good friends. Though when Oikawa comes over for lunch, Matsukawa does start to feel like a 3rd wheel. He’s come to accept it. His new friends are incredibly close. So when Oikawa shows up with a plus one, Matsukawa is a bit surprised. And shy. And nervous. And embarrassed. And just a little bit happy. They all make their introductions and sit down again. As he opens his lunch box, the plus one: Hanamaki, unabashedly gives Matsukawa a once-over. He shoots him a playful smirk and a wink, but goes right back to interrogating Oikawa and Iwaizumi.

Hanamaki is over the moon to have found wierdo-Oikawa’s childhood friend. (Oh the hilarious things he must have seen!) After a few minutes of conversing, the ever-protective Iwaizumi can tell that Hanamaki genuinely likes Oikawa, so he slowly lets his guard down. Hanamaki doesn’t take any of Oikawa’s crap either so he’s already making his way into Iwaizumi’s good books.

Matsukawa continues to go relatively unnoticed for the first few minutes, as he chews his peanut butter sandwich, but he’s having a great time listening to their funny stories and ridiculous banter. This Hanamaki is hilarious and there’s something about him that makes Matsukawa want to “keep up”. This time, when Oikawa retorts with something stupid back to Iwaizumi, Matsukawa finally blurts out one of the clever wisecracks he’d normally keep to himself. All inhabitants of the table go silent. A bite of food falls from Iwaizumi’s mouth. Oikawa’s eyes nearly pop out of his skull… Matsukawa is surprised he hasn’t keeled over on the spot yet from the sheer embarrassment; Especially when Hanamaki finally looks him in the eyes again and starts belly-laughing until there’s tears in his eyes and he can’t breathe. For the first time in a long time, it’s Matsukawa’s turn to wear a shit-eating grin.

Hanamaki decides right then and there that the quiet, adorably unassuming Matsukawa is probably the most interesting person he’ll ever meet.


submitted by @ask-shun-izuki  ❤︎

There is nothing more important to me than you. Nothing. Not this film, not my whole sodding career, do you understand?” Sherlock said nothing, just looked at him with disbelieving eyes. “Don’t you fucking talk to me about something of value that I see in you, because it is you that I value, every bit of you, the shiny bits and the dodgy bits and all the bits in between. I don’t love you because of some little glimmer of worthiness that a bunch of fucking wankers convinced you that you didn’t possess. I don’t love you because you deserve it. None of us deserve it, but all of us deserve it. I love you because you are Sherlock Holmes and I am John Watson and we were waiting for each other without knowing it. You don’t have to act a certain way or be a certain person, you don’t have to earn my love, because it is yours no matter what you do and you’re just going to have to get used to it.
— 

–John Watson, Performance in a Leading Role by Mad_Lori, Chapter 13 

This whole scene is just so intense but John’s speech always makes me a bit teary. 

Come here, my thief, and take my hand
You have done your job, we have our man.
Lay down, my thief, here by my side
You are safe now, no need to hide.
Touch me, my thief, Make my breath fast
With your clever fingers, how could I last?
Cry out for me, my thief, as you clutch me tight
We are so perfect together, we fit just right.
Kiss me, my thief, your lips are so sweet
Laying here with you, my life is complete.
Sleep well, my thief, you have earned this time
For I am your Guard - My heart is thine.
—  lovely perfect Nwalin poem I received in my inbox
Courage (Klaine 5x16 Reaction)

Kurt and Blaine have another discussion after Blaine’s insecurities come out into the open. (Takes place during the episode between the discussion and the klaine/artie/sam scene)

PG, mention of the events of bash, warnings for discussion of negative body image

It was a quiet night after the fencing incident had led to Blaine’s insecurities bursting out from the mounting pressure he’d been hiding behind, which had caused Kurt’s defenses to shoot out like a forcefield. There had been a discussion, but no passionate makeup sex, at least not yet. Instead Blaine stayed late at the loft, since Sam had asked for some time that night for something needing 100 candles (Blaine hadn’t questioned it), and Artie and Rachel were both out. Kurt and Blaine were leaning against Kurt’s headboard, a movie playing on the laptop that neither of them was really watching. Instead it was the soft, careful contact of their hands clasped between them that was the center of their focus.

About a third of the way through, Kurt squeezed Blaine’s hand to get his full attention.

“Look, I know things from earlier are still…fresh,” he began, “but just know that I did hear you and what you’re struggling with. And…I understand.” Kurt paused, unsure of whether to go through with the thought. As if reading his mind, Blaine reached forward to minimize the movie before turning to face Kurt.

“It’s just…I know what it’s like to hate the way you look,” Kurt continued. “To not like what you see in the mirror. To be ridiculed and mocked and physically punished by others for your appearance. And I – god, I should have said something when those guys in combat class were being mean to you.” He closed his eyes, shaking his head.

Keep reading

A list of things I`ll probably never tell you:
1. Living with you is like living with two different people- I hate both of you somehow. I hate the person wo taught me fear and the person who taught me how to ride a bike for mocking me with who you could´ve been.

2. Yesterday I caught myself hoping that you had a mental illness, then at least I knew that you didn´t do it deliberatly. That you are forced to do this like we are forced to endure this.

3. Let me tell you one thing: Every man that has to compare himself with the worst of his kind to defend his actions doesn´t deserve to be a man.

4. Don´t you see how you´re painting my future with the shadows of blue and black? Don´t you see how you teach me that i can never go to you for help when someone decides I´m better at being a punching bag than a living person, don´t you see how weak that makes me?

5. I´m not afraid of your fists, but the moment you open your mouth I remember every time you used your tounge to slice other people open and I hate your voice even when you call me beautiful.

6. The day I learned I have to earn your love was the moment you lost my trust and I couldn´t bear hearing your name again.

7. Statistics show you how many boys kill their fathers for abusing their mothers, but they don´t show you the silent rage of daughters. You don´t see how they are willing to take a blow knowing that they will destroy you when you expect it the least.

8. Thank you for making me strong. Thank you for showing me the cruelty of this world. Thank you for teaching me how to fight before knowing how to love.

9. Everyone tells me that people can change, that they just have to find their true selves. And I hope that you´re one of these people because the worst mistake I made was never kowing how to hate you and hating myself instead.

anonymous asked:

Draw the first thing that crosses your mind.

thank you everyone who’s commissioned me this year to help me reach this goal

How surprising is when you are so desperately in pain that you hold on to whatever that makes you feel a little better just to stay alive, because you still have hope.
That’s what I did (and still do, and always will…) with Josh and Tyler.
Sometimes I feel so ridiculous bc I adore them like they were God or something and they don’t know me but then I remember I probably wouldn’t be alive if I didn’t know about them and their message so I keep holding on.
Everynight when I start receiving my suicidal thoughts I just put my headphones on with Ty’s voice on them and I cry until I fall asleep. Then I wake up and it’s everything okay until night comes again and so do my suicidal thoughts.
This is not life but at least they keep me alive and I don’t care for how long will it work, but I will always listen to their songs and think of them when I’m on the edge. 
Thank you Tyler and Josh for helping me to stay alive. You have no idea of how special is the place you have earned in my torn heart. I love you forever.♡

Okay, look. I’m re-reading Performance in a Leading Role by @madlori and of course it’s perfect and wonderful because that’s just how it is. But this time the passages about love are really getting to me. This is good shit, people. This is like… these are up there with the most beautiful and moving wedding vows you’ve ever heard, as far as capturing the essence of romantic love.

I mean look at this:

“All right. Here is what I want. I want you to be there when I wake up, and I want to be there when you go to sleep. I want to only have to cross a room to talk to you, not an ocean or a city or even a street. I want you to know the things I know, and I want to know the things you know. I want to assume that I will see you every day. I want us to have plans without having to make the plans. I want to you to be a part of my decisions about my career, and I want to be a part of yours. I want to read the scripts you’re considering and have you read mine. I want to know that you are there and for you to know that I am. I want it to just be understood that anything that involves me also involves you.”

::sniffle::

Or this bit:

“Don’t you fucking talk to me about something of value that I see in you, because it is you that I value, every bit of you, the shiny bits and the dodgy bits and all the bits in between. I don’t love you because of some little glimmer of worthiness that a bunch of fucking wankers convinced you that you didn’t possess. I don’t love you because you deserve it. None of us deserve it, but all of us deserve it. I love you because you are Sherlock Holmes and I am John Watson and we were waiting for each other without knowing it. You don’t have to act a certain way or be a certain person, you don’t have to earn my love, because it is yours no matter what you do and you’re just going to have to get used to it.”

None of us deserve it, but all of us deserve it.

THAT IS SOME DEEP STUFF THERE, MADLORI.

GAH IT’S TOO MUCH. HOW HAVE I GAZED UPON PERFECTION AND LIVED TO TELL THE STORY??