you explain my life

“So what is your role?”

“Oh uh. I’m trained to be a biologist, but am currently a poison merchant.”
“Ah. You humans do not manufacture any biologically, so that makes sense. Is it for defence?”
“Uhm. Not really.”
“For… pest control?”
“Haha, nah. More for <<excrement and amusement>>”
“I think there was a translator issue there. What was that?”
I take it your species doesn’t do the recreational ethanol thing, eh?”
“What?!”
Look bys, its a big thing here. Fancy meals are expected to have a poison accompaniment. We brew poisons to try winning world poison competitions. We mix poisons to try and make them taste as much as fruit as possible, or as strong as possible. There’s Expensive Poisons that have smoked ingredients to taste both toxic AND burning. A bit of an acquired taste, that one.”
“….humans are weird.”

A MESSAGE FROM AVI
Hello everyone. If you haven’t yet watched the video then these words might come as a shock to you. If you have watched, know that this is exactly what I would have said in the video, if filming it wasn’t one of the toughest things I’ve ever had to do. This morning, I announced that I will be taking a step back from PTX.
I’ve struggled with this decision a lot. It has been the hardest decision I’ve ever had to make in my life. Before I explain why, I want you all to know that the past 6 years have been the most unbelievable years of my life. The things we’ve accomplished, the places we’ve seen, the people we’ve touched with our music… It surpasses anything that I could have ever dreamed up for my life.
I believe one of the big reasons why we have been so successful and accomplished all that we have is because of the unbelievably fast pace that we keep. Throughout my journey with PTX, this pace has always been a struggle for me. It’s been hard for me not to be with my family and friends when I need them or when they need me. It’s been hard to not be able to escape into nature when I’m feeling overwhelmed or just need some time to myself.
Through all of this, I’ve done my best and I’ve kept pushing myself to keep up. Really, the reason why I’ve been able to push so hard and for so long has been because of you guys. You all have inspired me and lifted me up every single day and, for that, I am eternally grateful.
I do love you all so very much, but I’ve come to a point where I just can’t keep up anymore and I would never want to inhibit any type of success that we have because I truly do believe in everything that we’ve done and everything that they will do. I just know that I can no longer continue at this pace and so I have to do what’s best for the group and I have to do what’s best for me.
I do want you all to know that I’m still going to be doing music and I’m going to be doing it with my whole heart. I will ALWAYS do my best to lift others up with my voice. I hope that you’ll all support my decision and that you can understand where I’m coming from. And regardless of anything, I just want to thank you for all that you’ve given to me. I have been so unbelievably blessed and humbled to be a part of all your lives in any way and I wanted you to hear this from me. From my voice. And from my heart.
I love you all deeply and I thank you for everything. Truly.
And just so you know, I will still be performing at all of our announced shows, so come say hi and give me a hug. I love hugs.
Avi


I know the announcement is already going around tumblr but I thought I’d upload the video. Watching it made me realize how sad and sorry he is. And even though I’m upset about the news, I think I’m more worried about him. I’m seeing lots of support and love for him on the internet, and I hope he’ll see it. Hopefully his decision will allow him to take back control of his life, get some rest and focus on whatever he wants. Maybe he’ll finally ask Sara Bareilles out, who knows… I just want him to be happy. It’s going to be hard for the band and for us fans, but both Avi and Pentatonix will still be able to make good music and succeed; except now he’s going to be able to breathe and go at his own pace.
Also, give him a hug from me if you can! x

“I want you to tell me about every person you’ve ever been in love with.
Tell me why you loved them,
then tell me why they loved you.

Tell me about a day in your life you didn’t think you’d live through.
Tell me what the word home means to you
and tell me in a way that I’ll know your mother’s name
just by the way you describe your bedroom
when you were eight.

See, I want to know the first time you felt the weight of hate,
and if that day still trembles beneath your bones.

Do you prefer to play in puddles of rain
or bounce in the bellies of snow?
And if you were to build a snowman,
would you rip two branches from a tree to build your snowman arms
or would leave your snowman armless
for the sake of being harmless to the tree?
And if you would,
would you notice how that tree weeps for you
because your snowman has no arms to hug you
every time you kiss him on the cheek?

Do you kiss your friends on the cheek?
Do you sleep beside them when they’re sad
even if it makes your lover mad?
Do you think that anger is a sincere emotion
or just the timid motion of a fragile heart trying to beat away its pain?

See, I wanna know what you think of your first name,
and if you often lie awake at night and imagine your mother’s joy
when she spoke it for the very first time.

I want you to tell me all the ways you’ve been unkind.
Tell me all the ways you’ve been cruel.
Tell me, knowing I often picture Gandhi at ten years old
beating up little boys at school.

If you were walking by a chemical plant
where smokestacks were filling the sky with dark black clouds
would you holler “Poison! Poison! Poison!” really loud
or would you whisper
“That cloud looks like a fish,
and that cloud looks like a fairy!”

Do you believe that Mary was really a virgin?
Do you believe that Moses really parted the sea?
And if you don’t believe in miracles, tell me —
how would you explain the miracle of my life to me?

See, I wanna know if you believe in any god
or if you believe in many gods
or better yet
what gods believe in you.
And for all the times that you’ve knelt before the temple of yourself,
have the prayers you asked come true?
And if they didn’t, did you feel denied?
And if you felt denied,
denied by who?

I wanna know what you see when you look in the mirror
on a day you’re feeling good.
I wanna know what you see when you look in the mirror
on a day you’re feeling bad.
I wanna know the first person who taught you your beauty
could ever be reflected on a lousy piece of glass.

If you ever reach enlightenment
will you remember how to laugh?

Have you ever been a song?
Would you think less of me
if I told you I’ve lived my entire life a little off-key?
And I’m not nearly as smart as my poetry
I just plagiarize the thoughts of the people around me
who have learned the wisdom of silence.

Do you believe that concrete perpetuates violence?
And if you do —
I want you to tell me of a meadow
where my skateboard will soar.

See, I wanna know more than what you do for a living.
I wanna know how much of your life you spend just giving,
and if you love yourself enough to also receive sometimes.
I wanna know if you bleed sometimes
from other people’s wounds,
and if you dream sometimes
that this life is just a balloon —
that if you wanted to, you could pop,
but you never would
‘cause you’d never want it to stop.

If a tree fell in the forest
and you were the only one there to hear —
if its fall to the ground didn’t make a sound,
would you panic in fear that you didn’t exist,
or would you bask in the bliss of your nothingness?

And lastly, let me ask you this:

If you and I went for a walk
and the entire walk, we didn’t talk —
do you think eventually, we’d… kiss?

No, wait.
That’s asking too much —
after all,
this is only our first date.”

—  Andrea Gibson
4

I never came to the beach or stood by the ocean
I never sat by the shore under the sun with my feet in the sand
But you brought me here and I’m happy that you did
‘Cause now I’m as free as birds catching the wind

I always thought I would sink, so I never swam
I never went boatin’, don’t get how they are floatin’
And sometimes I get so scared
Of what I can’t understand

But here I am
Next to you
The sky’s more blue
In Malibu
Next to you
In Malibu
Next to you, baby

We watched the sun go down as we were walking
I’d spend the rest of my life just standing here talking
You would explain the current as I just smile
Hoping that you’ll stay the same and nothing will change
And it’ll be us just for a while
Do they even exist?
That’s when I make the wish
To swim away with the fish

Is it supposed to be this hot all summer long?
I never would’ve believed you
If three years ago you told me
I’d be here writing this song

But here I am
Next to you
The sky’s so blue
In Malibu
Next to you
In Malibu
Next to you, baby

Next to you
The sky’s so blue
In Malibu, baby
Next to you

We are just like the waves that flow back and forth
Sometimes I feel like I’m drowning and you’re there to save me
And I wanna thank you with all of my heart

It’s a brand new start
A dream come true
In Malibu

In so many ways, you’re the only person keeping my world from flying apart. Too many things have come crumbling down around me, and I spend many days questioning how close I’ve allowed myself to become to you. There are nights when I wonder if this is going to end the way that all of the others did, if something’s going to happen that ruins us. I apologize for the many times that I’ve almost let myself pull away from you because of that. Just don’t leave me here.
—  🖤
I tend to be inherently good at stringing together a collection of syllables, in order to create something beautiful. I’m no stranger to the act of writing stories, and letters, and sonnets about the girls I claimed to love. I have described them as everything from powerful ocean waves to jaw dropping cotton candy sunsets.

But when I try to write about her, all that comes to mind is the fact that I fall asleep instantly in her arms, and that there is nowhere I’d rather be, than by her side for the remainder of my days. That I love her, in the realest and most grounded sense of the phrase. There are no misguided metaphors comparing her smile to the brightness of a thousand suns, because no matter how hard I try, she is the first girl I can’t seem to put into words.
—  What words miss
Explain why it’s not me. Because we both know, “I don’t have feelings for you,” would be a lie and “You’re too good for me,” is an excuse. So explain,why do you search for parts of me in everyone?
—  They arent me
  • John Laurens: Hamilton? Y-yeah he's a great friend, uh, my best friend , I don't love him, nop enever nope *trips* *hundreds of love letters spill from his pockets* fuck those aren’t mine I swear I’m just holding them for a friend I- *slips on a pile of letters* FUcK nO they’re not miNe I don’t even know who Ham was sending them to! *drawings of Ham fall out as he falls to his knees, desperately trying to pick them up* hang on a sec jUst YOU WAIT I cAn ExPLaiN
on being unprepared

on this day 8 (eight!) years ago I had a baby in the bathroom after uttering the immortally stupid words “there’s something between my legs!” You have to understand that I had never had a baby before so I didn’t have any point of comparison and the midwife who came over during the night when my waters broke thought it would take HOURS longer than it did, hence my surprise. “We’ll be there in a few minutes,” she said on the phone when I explained that I thought I was pushing, but by the time she got there my mum & partner had already done the delivery honours and I was sitting blinking on the bathroom floor, holding a baby wrapped in a beach towel and wondering what had just happened. (I’d had a baby, obviously, but making a new person is quite hard to take in before breakfast.) 

And today that baby is EIGHT and got a skateboard for her birthday and is generally brilliant, so if a person as blatantly unprepared for parenthood as I was in 2009 can keep a tiny defenseless human being alive for 8 entire years (8 ENTIRE YEARS) then I am here to tell you that you, too, can do the thing, whatever the thing you feel unprepared for is! Just have a beach towel handy! Try not to say anything really stupid because your mum will keep telling the story for the rest of her life and you’ll wish you hadn’t sounded like such a village idiot! But honestly just wing it, no one’s caught me out yet and I have a mortgage and a job and 2 kids (the second one is still alive too!) and everything

Lol I’m so mad. Don’t message me with ship hate. If you don’t like a ship I draw/ship I like blacklist it or unfollow me. I don’t need to be told how disgusting I am or how much you hate me.

8

THE WORLD OF WEEABOOS

No, you don’t understand. This scene basically interprets what almost EVERY weeaboo goes through.

You’ve got the TRASH who is obsessed with their interest, the FAMILY who’s used to the obsession, the MIDDLEMAN who knows the world but isn’t completely engrossed by it, and the OUTSIDER who has no clue and is overwhelmed with confusion; and who requires the assistance of the middleman.

I AM BASICALLY SEKITO, WHO IS DEFINITELY ONE OF MY SPIRIT ANIMALS.

1

An all-night barbeque. A dance on the courthouse lawn.
The radio aches a little tune that tells the story of what the night
is thinking. It’s thinking of love.
It’s thinking of stabbing us to death
and leaving our bodies in a dumpster.
That’s a nice touch, stains in the night, whiskey and kisses for everyone.


Tonight, by the freeway, a man eating fruit pie with a buckknife
carves the likeness of his lover’s face into the motel wall. I like him
and I want to be like him, my hands no longer an afterthought.


2

Someone once told me that explaining is an admission of failure.
I’m sure you remember, I was on the phone with you, sweetheart.


3

History repeats itself. Somebody says this.
History throws its shadow over the beginning, over the desktop,
over the sock drawer with its socks, its hidden letters.
History is a little man in a brown suit
trying to define a room he is outside of.
I know history. There are many names in history
but none of them are ours.


4

He had green eyes,
so I wanted to sleep with him—
green eyes flecked with yellow, dried leaves on the surface of a pool-
You could drown in those eyes, I said.
The fact of his pulse,
the way he pulled his body in, out of shyness or shame or a desire
not to disturb the air around him.
Everyone could see the way his muscles worked,
the way we look like animals,
his skin barely keeping him inside.
I wanted to take him home
and rough him up and get my hands inside him, drive my body into his
like a crash test car.
I wanted to be wanted and he was
very beautiful, kissed with his eyes closed, and only felt good while moving.
You could drown in those eyes, I said,
so it’s summer, so it’s suicide,
so we’re helpless in sleep and struggling at the bottom of the pool.


5

It wasn’t until we were well past the middle of it
that we realized
the old dull pain, whose stitched wrists and clammy fingers,
far from being subverted,
had only slipped underneath us, freshly scrubbed.
Mirrors and shop windows returned our faces to us,
replete with the tight lips and the eyes that remained eyes
and not the doorways we had hoped for.
His wounds healed, the skin a bit thicker than before,
scars like train tracks on his arms and on his body underneath his shirt.


6

We still groped for each other on the backstairs or in parked cars
as the roads around us
grew glossy with ice and our breath softened the view through a glass
already laced with frost,
but more frequently I was finding myself sleepless, and he was running out
of lullabies.
But damn if there isn’t anything sexier
than a slender boy with a handgun,
a fast car, a bottle of pills.


7

What would you like? I’d like my money’s worth.
Try explaining a life bundled with episodes of this—
swallowing mud, swallowing glass, the smell of blood
on the first four knuckles.
We pull our boots on with both hands
but we can’t punch ourselves awake and all I can do
is stand on the curb and say Sorry
about the blood in your mouth. I wish it was mine.


I couldn’t get the boy to kill me, but I wore his jacket for the longest time.

—  Little Beast, Richard Siken

Out of Context Ace Attorney Starters (based on @outofcontextaceattorney)

“Have you just been rambling all this time without any sense of inner monologue!?”
“Get a little too addicted to using your precious white powder, did you?”
“Are you saying all baseballs are suspicious because they have stitches!?”
“Why is it lately, all I want to do is cry…?”
“Well, you know what they say about guys with long names… They’re difficult to pronounce!”
“Get your finger out of the breeze and put it to good use.”
“What’s crack-a-lackin’, homie?”
“If you’re going to ride that stallion into the sunrise, wait for me, I want in too!”
“My panties are an extra-dimensional space… Anything can fit in there!”
“If you start eating the crime scene… I’ll make you leave…”
“I’m… totally lost… so why don’t you just tell me the answer already?”
“I set my ATM card’s number to ‘0001’ because I’m number one!”
“I’ve given up trying to understand them. It’s much easier that way.”
“I live, eat and breathe potatoes now. Potatoes are… my life.”
“Don’t mind me! Just forgot a few things! …Wallet, phone, the documents, my bag…”
“My beauty can’t possibly be captured by a mere crayon!”
“Hiding under that table would mean being surrounded by the four naked men, though.”
“…My forbidden imagination is starting to imagine things.”
“So how does it feel to be thoroughly rammed?”
“I, on the other hand, call it a mistake.”
“It was probably because of his worthless male pride.”
“Who can say? I seldom pay attention to mundane things such as time and place.”
“You should really come with a supply of cheese to match your vintage whine.”
“I can only speak a few phrases, such as, 'I love you,’ and, 'Where is the toilet?’”
“…I have no objection to the whip.”
“I’ll catch her with her pants down… So to speak.”
“This man doesn’t get sarcasm.”
“My mind and body are kaput. Same goes for my life.”
“Care to explain why you chose to finger that person?”
“People have all kinds of fetishes.”
“I will not allow birds to be belittled in my presence!”
“Salt runs in the family, you might say.”
“What’s 'hard’!?”
“Tell me about the dogs!”
“Cut the existential bull or I’ll cut you.”
“Sorry, am I supposed to be consoling you over your first-world problems?”
“I believe in the power of science.”
“People don’t die that easily, really.”
“I didn’t sign up for this!”
“You don’t need nail polish to get to someone’s mouth.”
“And even though the weather is gorgeous today, it’s raining inside my heart…”
“Things are already confusing enough with all these daddies running around.”
“What the heck, right?”
“His name is… something weird. I forget.”
“The spork is a wonderful invention.”
“I love weenies. I can’t get enough of their tender juiciness.”
“Welcome back to reality! We’ve been waiting for you.”

hi there, its qis here! i am so proud to announce and share with you all that i reached my first 1000 followers on this blog. its been a good year and yeah, its a slow feat but till this day, i cannot believe i have such wonderful people that follow this trashy ass blog to read my stories, reblog my shitposts and share my endless amount of love for 7 dorks✨. over this year, i met such extremely amazing friends and followers from all around this world, and i want to thank you all for sticking with me and this shitty blog of mine like srsly thank you so much i didnt think i would have made it this far 💕💕💕

also a big fat JUICY THANKS to all my favourite writers and artists who have given me so much inspirations and drive to reach to where i am right now. im just a struggling amateur writer still in search of her style but being surround by such amazing writers and stories, i have never been so secure:) once again, a big fat JUICIER THANKS to my followers for supporting me, and my friends and mutuals who have been such amazing sisters to me🙏🙏

thought i would do another follow forever hehe. summertae is a sideblog and i will just tag blogs who also followed my mainblog @dulcetdaisies 

bolded - mutuals
amazing high quality friends - ❤️
favourite writers / artists aka no.1 inspirations - ✨ (notice me senpai :3)
trashy hoez who thirst with me 24/7 / snapchat buddiezz - 💦

Keep reading

I wish I was good at talking. I wish I could captivate anyone around me with the way words fall out of my mouth. I wish I knew how to explain myself so strangers could become friends. I wish I was interesting and always said the right thing. I wish I could keep someone’s attention. I wish I could sit down next to someone and talk to them for hours with no lulls. But instead, I always get lost in my thoughts. I never know where to begin, but I’m learning. For now, I’ll just start with a smile and a hello.
—  Excerpt from a book I’ll never write, 29
“The simple hello”