you don't want to know how i got these

Ravenclaw Headcanon

Ravenclaws are very happy that their dormitory is in a tower. Most of the windows can be climbed out of and they pull themselves onto the roof. They don’t do it like the Gryffindors do, for bravery, but for solitude. There is an unspoken rule that if a Ravenclaw sees another Ravenclaw on the roof, they don’t talk. On the roof or afterwards. It’s a safe space. Sometimes it’s where Ravenclaws be the teenagers they are and smoke, while sometimes it’s a peaceful place to just read. If a Ravenclaw is sitting on the roof crying, any other Ravenclaw, friend or not, will go and sit on the roof with them until they calm down. And another unspoken rule is that if someone sat on the roof and cried more than twice in a week, they have to talk to someone about it, a friend, a professor, or Madam Pomfrey. This is what once led a third year Ravenclaw to march a first year Gryffindor, who had somehow made his way on the roof of Ravenclaw Tower, to Professor McGonagall. He thought he was in trouble, but became very confused when he was simply asked how he felt.

My Fire Emblem Heroes Team! ★★★★★
I put Roy as my leader because I’m an asshole to people in Arena

8

Even More Information:

• Non-canon animals need to be discussed in private, and might cost a few extra dollars to design.

• I have no clue how, or why, you’d want it but I’m not drawing any NSFW! Sorry bucko!

• Picture references, if you have them, will 10000% improve how I perceive what you want me to draw. Make sure to include them if you can.

How to contact and commission:

Email me at chickenstab@yahoo.com, and make sure you title your email with something commission-related. Its easy to skim over emails that I’m not looking for (at least, it is for me!).

Make sure you describe exactly what you’re commissioning (Full model, Flat colors, or Concept sketch). Doubly make sure you include every single bit of detail and information, because you’re going to want it to be perfect!

Payment is through paypal, and will be given once it’s time to pay up (I’ll specify when)!

Don’t worry, I show you my progress! But you don’t get to see the finished product until it’s paid for. That’s just me lookin’ out for myself, making sure I don’t get scammed out of my drawings!

If I get too many commissions at one time, I may close off commissions, or put people on a waiting list. I’m not a 24/7 drawing machine, unfortunately.


Thanks for reading & considering! A reblog is appreciated if you can’t/don’t want to commission yourself!

How to Adult: Cover Letter Edition

So I have several followers who are working on applying to jobs right now, and by far the most common concern is “what even is a cover letter??”  Now, while this post is funny and accurate, it’s not super helpful if you’re looking for specifics.  So I figured I should show you mine.  Now, without further ado, allow me to provide to you:

~*~ The Cover Letter of Destiny ~*~

[Name]
[Address Line 1]
[Address Line 2, etc]
[Phone]
[email]

[Right Justified - Date]  (This is just standard business letter stuff)

To Whom it May Concern, [Or Mr/Ms. Hiring Person’s name, if you can find it.] 

I’m delighted to submit an application for the [Job you’re applying to] position at [Company/Institution/etc].  After reading the job description I’m certain I would bring a solid combination of  [Skill 1], analytical thinking [or whatever Skill 2 is], and communication skills [This is always my Skill 3] to this position.  I’m particularly attracted to this position because I believe it will utilize the skills I have gained through my industry [or research or whatever] experience, and allow me to apply those skills in new areas. 

In my role with [Company] as a [Most Relevant Position Here], I managed a project [to do some stuff - flesh out your most important/relevant job responsibilities here].  I specifically focused on [a thing that is the most explicitly relevant to the job posting.  In fact, I creatively copy/pasted some of the job posting into this sentence, that’s how relevant it is.].  I was also responsible for [A couple of things that maybe were mentioned in the job posting, or at least show increased responsibility over time].  This gave me the opportunity to collaborate with a variety of different team members [to achieve a goal]. Through these and other job duties, I have gained excellent listening skills and the ability to carry out self-directed tasks in the context of a larger team. [i’m not joking. use this phrasing it’s so great just copy it idgaf]

 In my current role as a [Current Title] with [Company], I have continued to build strong skills in project management [or whatever] as well as clear oral and written communication. [Maybe this sentence describes the types of communication (or whatever skill) you do.]   [This sentence describes briefly the less-relevant work you do].  [This sentence ties in your less-relevant job to the job you are seeking].  These experiences have prepared me well to succeed in a role as [Name of Position you’re applying to].

Thank you for taking the time to review my materials and consider my application. I am excited at the prospect of applying my skills to a [Name or category of position] with [Company], and I feel that the knowledge and skills I have gained through my experience will be a great benefit to the team. Please do not hesitate to contact me with questions as I would welcome a chance to discuss this opportunity more. [After all, they want to hire you after reading this]

Regards,

 [First Name Last Name]

I hope you find this helpful in your job search!  Just remember to focus on skills you learned rather than specific experiences or titles you’ve had.  Don’t be afraid of inflating it too far, either.  There are real useful skills underlying every job task if you look hard & get creative with your phrasing. 

Feel free to send me an ask if you want any specific advice on how to spin your education/work history into the job you want, or if you want a proofreader or cheerleader or whatever.  Job hunting is a bad game designed by and for a certain type of person.  It’s dehumanizing and horrible even at the best of times, so I’m more than happy to help anyone find a way to beat the system.  <3 <3 

In a world where Symmetra has interactions
  • Zenyatta: You recite the mantra of illusory life and death, yet work for a corporation motivated by physical gain.
  • Symmetra: A mind unburdened is easier to enlighten, wouldn't you say? A cleaner, better world is the first step.
  • --
  • Symmetra: How can someone so hyperactive be quite possibly the most balanced one here?
  • Tracer: Dunno! I just like to let loose and enjoy life, I guess!
  • --
  • Sombra: You should get a life outside of your work.
  • Symmetra: You should live your life entirely outside of yours.
  • --
  • Zarya: Could you make a construct so heavy I could not lift it?
  • Symmetra: I would have to ascertain there is something you cannot lift, first.
  • --
  • Hanzo: I want to ask you: Is the path you walk in life one you know is right?
  • Symmetra: I can only believe it is right. Though even that...
  • --
  • Symmetra: How can you so gratuitously waste money blowing up your mech?
  • D.Va: Chill out, I got sponsor money for days!
  • --
  • D.Va: It's kinda weird chatting with somebody my BFF hates.
  • Symmetra: And his feelings should affect yours because?
  • --
  • Symmetra: ... I mean, a peg leg, really? I could make a prosthe--
  • Junkrat: Don't even think about touchin' me!
  • --
  • Doomfist: It is easy to understand. We cannot attain higher ground if we are complacent, and unchallenged.
  • Symmetra: It is easy to understand. We cannot attain higher ground if we are chaotic, and dead.
  • --
  • Mercy: I know you might not hear this much, but, I truly admire your ideals of a world to benefit all, Ms. Vaswani.
  • Symmetra: But it is your selfless desire to help others that is to be praised, Doctor Ziegler.

anonymous asked:

I want to live by myself when I move out of my parent's place but I'm really afraid of money problems? I'm afraid that the only place I can afford will be in the ghetto and it'll all be torn apart and I'll only be allowed to eat one granola bar a week. I'm really stressing out about this. I don't know anything about after school life. I don't know anything about paying bills or how to buy an apartment and it's really scaring me. is there anything you know that can help me?

HI darling,

I’ve actually got a super wonderful masterpost for you to check out:

Home

Money

Health

Emergency

Job

Travel

Better You

Apartments/Houses/Moving

Education

Finances

Job Hunting

Life Skills

Miscellaneous

Relationships

Travel & Vehicles


Other Blog Features

Asks I’ll Probably Need to Refer People to Later

Adult Cheat Sheet:

Once you’ve looked over all those cool links, I have some general advice for you on how you can have some sort of support system going for you:

Reasons to move out of home

You may decide to leave home for many different reasons, including:

  • wishing to live independently
  • location difficulties – for example, the need to move closer to university
  • conflict with your parents
  • being asked to leave by your parents.

Issues to consider when moving out of home

It’s common to be a little unsure when you make a decision like leaving home. You may choose to move, but find that you face problems you didn’t anticipate, such as:

  • Unreadiness – you may find you are not quite ready to handle all the responsibilities.
  • Money worries – bills including rent, utilities like gas and electricity and the cost of groceries may catch you by surprise, especially if you are used to your parents providing for everything. Debt may become an issue.
  • Flatmate problems – issues such as paying bills on time, sharing housework equally, friends who never pay board, but stay anyway, and lifestyle incompatibilities (such as a non-drug-user flatting with a drug user) may result in hostilities and arguments.

Your parents may be worried

Think about how your parents may be feeling and talk with them if they are worried about you. Most parents want their children to be happy and independent, but they might be concerned about a lot of different things. For example:

  • They may worry that you are not ready.
  • They may be sad because they will miss you.
  • They may think you shouldn’t leave home until you are married or have bought a house.
  • They may be concerned about the people you have chosen to live with.

Reassure your parents that you will keep in touch and visit regularly. Try to leave on a positive note. Hopefully, they are happy about your plans and support your decision.

Tips for a successful move

Tips include:

  • Don’t make a rash decision – consider the situation carefully. Are you ready to live independently? Do you make enough money to support yourself? Are you moving out for the right reasons?
  • Draw up a realistic budget – don’t forget to include ‘hidden’ expenses such as the property’s security deposit or bond (usually four weeks’ rent), connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.
  • Communicate – avoid misunderstandings, hostilities and arguments by talking openly and respectfully about your concerns with flatmates and parents. Make sure you’re open to their point of view too – getting along is a two-way street.
  • Keep in touch – talk to your parents about regular home visits: for example, having Sunday night dinner together every week.
  • Work out acceptable behaviour – if your parents don’t like your flatmate(s), find out why. It is usually the behaviour rather than the person that causes offence (for example, swearing or smoking). Out of respect for your parents, ask your flatmate(s) to be on their best behaviour when your parents visit and do the same for them.
  • Ask for help – if things are becoming difficult, don’t be too proud to ask your parents for help. They have a lot of life experience.

If your family home does not provide support

Not everyone who leaves home can return home or ask their parents for help in times of trouble. If you have been thrown out of home or left home to escape abuse or conflict, you may be too young or unprepared to cope.

If you are a fostered child, you will have to leave the state-care system when you turn 18, but you may not be ready to make the sudden transition to independence.

If you need support, help is available from a range of community and government organisations. Assistance includes emergency accommodation and food vouchers. If you can’t call your parents or foster parents, call one of the associations below for information, advice and assistance.

Where to get help

  • Your doctor
  • Kids Helpline Tel. 1800 55 1800
  • Lifeline Tel. 13 11 44
  • Home Ground Services Tel. 1800 048 325
  • Relationships Australia Tel. 1300 364 277
  • Centrelink Crisis or Special Help Tel. 13 28 50
  • Tenants Union of Victoria Tel. (03) 9416 2577

Things to remember

  • Try to solve any problems before you leave home. Don’t leave because of a fight or other family difficulty if you can possibly avoid it.
  • Draw up a realistic budget that includes ‘hidden’ expenses, such as bond, connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.
  • Remember that you can get help from a range of community and government organizations. 

(source)

Keep me updated? xx

10

Get to know me: [1/10] Pairings

“William Darcy, I don’t want to be just friends and I don’t want to be with you cause I’m grateful. I want to be with you cause of you. Got it?”

BBS As Things I've Heard At School
  • Vanoss : I may be very popular but honestly I am so socially scared of people the only reason they like me os cause I smile and nod quietly while inwardly screaming in fear.
  • Delirious : Honestly if I'm voted most likely to be a killer I wouldn't evn be surprised. I think they even said that about me in pre-school.
  • Moo : I have unfortunately become the mom friend and it has made me afraid of ever becoming a mother.
  • " You're a guy. "
  • And? Women are strong to deal with this bullshit! I can't handle you all I would clearly never be a good mother.
  • Terroriser : You know how most people want all eyes on them when walking into a room? I figured it out. Walk in and start doing really loud impressions!
  • Ohm : I feel I'm the friend who you have around so at least someone is semi-innocent in this massive pile of devil spawns.
  • Wildcat : I have no choice but to hang out with you all - I don't know how to make friends anymore!
  • Mini : You want to know what sucks?! Emily got nominated for Prom King over me. One, she's a girl! Not that there's a problem with the fact she's female but in this case there are two seperate places! And a third if anyone were agender. AND TWO! SHE DOESN'T EVEN ATTEND THIS SCHOOL!
  • Nogla : I'm not actually as dumb as I come off as. *misspells their name on a test* O-Okay well you see...I have...no...okay.
  • Lui : Take me back to kindergarden. Snacks, recess and snacks. Away from bullshit and lies.
  • Basically : I had this group of friends before. They only hung out with me to show "diversity" so they didn't come off as racist. That comment madee realize they were. Ditched their asses.
  • Scotty : Only once in my life have I ever...I mean ever! Won at a game! Monopoly, Life, Mario Kart...life in general...
  • Smiity : *after someone accidently steps on the back of their shoe* Yeah okay bitch. Get ready for that fucking restraining order on your ass!
  • Cartoonz : I have been compared to a southern satan before. I'm not sure which was more true. The fact that I'm very Southern. Or that I'm satan. *hisses and chokes on spit*

feroluce  asked:

For a draw idea, would you like to draw more Takemob? Sorry, I know you don't usually do shippy stuff, so feel free to ignore this! But seeing Mob being the one to make Takenaka embarrassed is pretty rare and I just love how you portray them. (Not to mention your art style is super cute and I love it)

You want a blushy momo????? You fuckin’ got it dude

anonymous asked:

I'm convinced most Americans don't know how immigration works. Among other things.

I can assure you they don’t. I’ve talked about the immigration process and how I got here so many times and the reaction remains constant at no one knowing how complicated and rigid it is.

If it was simple for people to get immigration status illegal immigration would not be a “problem” (using that word loosely). Immigration is expensive. Sometimes the government makes a smooth 15k per head and guess what? You don’t get a refund if you’re rejected. Imagine being a law abiding citizen in your home country but want that “American dream” only to be rejected after spending over 5k in fees.

- Susie, the naturalized citizen.

anonymous asked:

Well, this is kinda angsty, but can I request a scenario where zen & mc are together and in the last rfa party zen slept with jaehee and after a few days jaehee couldn't deal with the blame and told mc in front of all rfa but MC pretended not to believe her (andthenrfa*cof*saeran*cof*tryingtocomforther). This is ridiculously specific, i know lolol but feel free if you don't want to do it, it's okay, or if you want to change anything just do it 😅 I love love love your blog and your writing ❤❤❤❤❤

Ok so this post actually ended up being realllly long and I don’t know how to do the ‘read more’ thing so I’m really sorry to anyone trying to scroll by
Oops 

And I’m so glad you like my writing, and I’m also really glad I got this request because at first I wasn’t sure how to write it (I basically ended up writing a fanfiction using bullet points haha oops) but I had a lot of fun doing it.

Disclaimer: I don’t think Zen would ever cheat and I actually don’t think Jaehee has any romantic feelings for him, just admiring adoration.

And I know you said I could change things
but it’s rlly angsty 
and I’m an angst monster and I kinda love it sooo i’m gonna keep it exactly how you wrote it  

let’s do it

  • Zen had always been flirty with you
  • And at some point..you had started flirting back
  • And soon it was more than flirting and you found yourself head over heels for each other
  • Constant phone calls too each other where you’d gush over how you wished you could see each other
  • Good morning and Goodnight texts
  • The occasional shameless flirt in the public chat
  • Once you two met at the first RFA party it was like a scene from a Disney movie, you two all but ran to each other and he swung you around once he snagged you in a tight embrace
  • Looking into his eyes you swore this could be love
  • He did too.
  • He really did swear he was in love with you
  • You were everything he had hoped and more
  • You were the person that woke him up everyday and put a smile on his face, you were the person that he thought of when love songs came on the radio, when he was on stage you were his muse, when he lay down to sleep at night you were the final thought in his head, and the first one in his dreams.
  • The next RFA party was a few months after you two had first met in person, only a couple months into your very happy relationship
  • You two had spent the first half of the night joined at the hip, happily enjoying each other’s company.
  • But somewhere throughout the nights timeline you both got distracted by separate guests and acquaintances and wandered away from each other.
  • Zen started drinking. Whoever he was talking to kept egging him on and the two of them were having a good ole time, which is rare for Zen in these occasions because the guests are usually upper class aristocrats like Jumin or if they are there for Zen, it’s as fans instead of friends
  • So he thought he’d treat himself
  • It got to be a bit much
  • The other guests were starting to notice and Jumin was not going to have the press covering Zen’s drunken gusto at an RFA event
  • “Assistant Kang,” Jumin sauntered over to Jaehee while keeping his eyes on Zen. “please escort Hyun to the back where he can cool down, out of the cameras’ lines of sight.”
  • “Of course, Mr. Han” And Jaehee was off. She was relieved that she had an excuse to get Zen out of the room, she too recognized the bad press that could follow this event but felt she hadn’t had the authority to tell Zen otherwise
  • But under the guise of Jumin’s will, she was able to convince Zen to head to the back so ‘Jumin wouldn’t bitch’ (in the words of the actor).
  • Soon it was just the two of them in the back room, Jaehee giving Zen water as he yanked at his shirt collar, complaining it was hot.
  • In his drunken shenanigens he managed to undo all his buttons at some point while Jaehee was getting more water, so she came back to shirtless Zen.
  • Zen knew those eyes.
  • As the assistant stared at his pectorals with a slight blush on her cheeks, he looked into her eyes and saw something
  • Adoration. Admiration. Want.
  • She wanted him.
  • Somewhere, deep in his psyche, behind the pseudo narcissist wall, 10 year old Hyun Ryu craved the attention. The positive attention his mom said he’d never get
  • He had you
  • But in that moment he had Jaehee too, and he couldn’t turn that down
  • Jaehee doesn’t even know how it initiated, she just recalls Zen pressing her against the wall and kissing her with a passion she’s never felt before.
  • His hands undoing the buttons of her shirt
  • His lips whispering praises of how she was not only successful, but also beautiful. And so sweet. And smart. And-
  • She almost cried. Someone as talented as Zen saw something so great in someone as plain as her? Impossible.
  • But he kept assuring her, and touching her, and loving her
  • Loving her the way he should have been loving you
  • The guilt hit her, but she watched it disappear as ecstasy took over
  • Zen passed out once they were both finished, pants undone and shirt wide open, but eyes closed and soft breaths flying in and out of his lips
  • Jaehee was wide awake though.
  • She was leaning against the wall, clothes messily pulled back on and tears threatening her eyes
  • The guilt was back and it felt like the weight of the world’s biggest mistake was sitting on her shoulders
  • She put her hands over her mouth as she stared at Zen, and she started crying when she thought of you.
  • “What have I done?”
  •  
  • After every party, the RFA gets together a few days later to go over logistics. What worked, what didn’t, who came, how to convince more people to come, etc
  • Jaehee’s heart dropped as you and Zen walked in together, a bright smile on your face, a blank slate on his.
  • No not blank
  • When Jaehee met his crimson eyes she saw it, the same thing he probably saw in her eyes: Guilt. Remorse. Regret.
  • She could barely stomach the feel as you greeted her and hugged her
  • “Jaehee! Good to see you! I feel like we didn’t get to talk much at the party thanks to someone making a little scene” As you pulled away you playfully rolled your eyes towards Zen. 
  • He just gave a nervous chuckle
  • Jaehee opened her mouth, ready to spill her guts, only to find it was dry as cotton. 
  • You gave her a quizzical look, ready to ask what was wrong, but Jumin’s voice interrupted with “Shall we begin?” looking pointedly at the three of you.
  • “Yahoo~” Seven cheered as he plopped down next to Saeran, who had recently been getting dragged along to all the RFA meetings, given he tended to just sit in the corner and pout.
  • Much like right now. He did little more than look at you and nod, which was as courteous a greeting as you were going to get with him.
  • Yoosung nodded, signaling everyone was ready, and the discussion began
  •  
  • You all were about 30 minutes into the conversation
  • Except for Jaehee
  • She couldn’t stop thinking about what happened the night of the party
  • She couldn’t stop looking at you and feeling guilty
  • She couldn’t stop thinking about telling you
  • “I need water” She stood up abruptly, startling everyone a bit
  • Jumin had a bit of an annoyed look on his face but conceded with “Fine. Quick 5 minute break for everyone”
  • Jaehee booked it to the kitchen
  • “Uh…I’m thirsty too.” Cue Zen bee-lining after her.
  • “Are you Okay??” He asked in a harsh whisper
  • “No I’m not okay!” Jaehee hissed back “We…we have to tell her.”
  • “No!” Zen’s eyes widened “No. You and I both know it was a mistake that will never happen again. She doesn’t need to know.”
  • “Zen if you love her-”
  • “I do love her!” He snapped back “I love her which is why I can’t lose her Jaehee. I know we messed up, I do. But..I can’t lose her over my mistakes” His eyes were pleading even more than his voice
  • Jaehee just stared into the crimson orbs, feeling the knot in her stomach grow. She just weakly nodded.
  • There was a moment of silence before she chugged her glass of water and turned to head back towards the living room where everyone was seated
  • She took a strong stride in
  • She bit her tongue
  • She was not going to-
  • You were the first face she met walking back in
  • Your smile welcoming her back to the circle
  • Your eyes cheery
  • Your heart open to her as it had been since the first day even when she treated you coldly.
  • Zen was right behind Jaehee and nearly bumped into her when she stopped dead in her tracks
  • “Jaehee?” You and he called at the same time, him due to her abrupt stop, and you because of the tears suddenly pouring from her eyes.
  • “Jaehee what’s wrong?” You rushed to her, attracting everyone’s attention
  • You caught Zen’s face from over her shoulder, his eyes wide. Knowing.
  • “M-MC” Jaehee choked out
  • “W-What is it?” You asked worriedly taking her trembling hands in yours
  • “MC” Her voice fell. There was just a moment of silence. Everyone in the room was looking, the outburst had even taken a hold of Saeran’s full attention.
  • “Zen and I…we’ve done something awful” 
  • You knew what she was suggesting but..no. No you didn’t. No way that’s what she meant you’re just confusing things.
  • “…What did you do?” You asked cautiously
  • Sniffling. Endless sniffling. You looked to Zen, who was pale and looked like he was also ready to cry.
  • “Zen…what happened?”
  • “I’m so sorry” He managed to get out before the lump in his throat clogged his vocal cords.
  • “At the party MC we- we had….” Jaehee couldn’t get the filthy three letter word out of her mouth
  • You dropped her hands and looked to Zen
  • “MC I’m so sorry” Zen repeated, his voice shaking even more
  • Everyone was quiet, waiting for your response
  • You had none. Just an empty stare and mouth slightly agape, waiting for words to come out of their own accord
  •  Finally they did
  • “This is a really cruel joke to play” You feigned a very obvious forced smile as your eyes blinked back tears “I never thought you guys would do such a thing..haha” You wiped a way a small drop ready to roll down your cheek
  • “MC!” Jaehee exclaimed “This isn’t-”
  • “Jaehee.” Your voice dropped. “I really don’t find this funny.”
  • “Neither do I!” The brown haired girl went to take your hand again but you pulled away
  • “And Zen” You turned to him “I don’t- I don’t know..how…” You couldn’t finish the sentence
  • They were everywhere. Pouring down your face, flooding your eyes, gathering in a small pool at your chin. It was an onslaught of tears rolling down your cheeks, choking your words, your thoughts, your everything.
  • “MC” Zen reached out to you, only to have his hand swatted away by yours.
  • You just stared at him and cried, forcing him to look you in the eyes as your faux smile fell to pieces. 
  • You felt a hand softly fall upon your shoulder, and you turned to see Seven looking at you, apologetic pity in his eyes. Saeran stood behind him, wearing an angrier version of his twin’s sentiment. 
  • “Let’s go for a ride, get some fresh air, huh MC?” The red head’s voice was soft
  • You softly nodded and let him guide you towards the door, not even able to muster up to energy to look back at Jaehee and Zen. 
  • Saeran did however, and he looked back towards the two with a face full of disgust, up until the moment he slammed the door
  • “what a good meeting” Jumin grumbled under his breath as he turned a disdainful eye towards Zen
  •  
  • You drove for a couple hours probably. Most of it in silence, but a comfortable one. You were in the passenger seat and Saeran was in the back, Seven at the wheel finding desolate roads and flying down them, giving the wind of your open window some sort of purifying feeling. It stung, but it felt good. Your hair whipped around and the land raced by and you occasionally sobbed but that was ok.
  • Eventually you found yourself back at the Chois’ place, sitting on the couch, staring at a TV playing a movie that you hadn’t been paying attention to for the last hour. Your mind was elsewhere, wondering what you had done wrong.
  • You looked at the carton of ice cream in your hand, only doing so because the sight of Saeran setting his own empty one on the coffee table had triggered you to remember Seven had given you your own carton to drown your sorrows in.
  • The redhead had actually gone out to buy more, so it was just you and Saeran on the black leather couch staring at the TV screen.
  • “Do you want this?” You offered the ice cream to Saeran who’s expression turned from bored to surprised, probably because you’d been silent for the past six hours aside from a sob here and there.
  • “You don’t want it?”
  • “I’m not hungry”
  • He stared at you and the carton for a second, his face unreadable.
  • He wanted to insist you eat the ice cream, because personally he found it to always make him feel better, but he figured you didn’t want to hear it.
  • He took the carton from your hands and placed it on the table in front of you two
  • Silence aside from the noise of the TV.
  • He cast a glance to you, only to find your eyes on the floor.
  • “doyou wantalk” You barely understood what he said it was so quiet
  • “What?” You looked to him
  • He thought you were asking out of surprise rather than inaudibility and “My therapist…he says that talking things out makes you feel better.” He looked indignant for a moment, likely remembering how stupid he felt when he rejected the idea only to find later that his therapist had been correct
  • “I…I have nothing to say” Your shell of a voice whispered
  • Saeran furrowed his brows at you. “Say you hate them”
  • “What?”
  • His voice raised a bit “You hate them don’t you? So say it. The therapist said talk about your feelings so start there. They’re scumbags who hurt you and deser-”
  • “No!” You’re voice hit a volume it hadn’t reached in hours. “I don’t hate them!”
  • Saeran was mixed with confusion and anger “What do you mean you don’t hate them? One of your best friends and your boyfriend fucked-”
  • There it was
  • Someone finally said it.
  • The hot tears made a return and began rolling down your cheeks as sudden sobs erupted from your mouth
  • Saeran was alarmed at the sudden show and tried to pinpoint the trigger. He supposes it could be his last sentence but it’s not as if it wasn’t something we all knew.
  • “I….I don’t hate them” You cried once the worst of the sobs subsided.”I don’t even think I want to hate them. I mean it’d be easier but…I don’t. Jaehee…it’s not her fault. She just..got wrapped up in it all. And she’s always liked Zen. How could she have said no. And he..he was drunk” You sputtered out your rationalizations to find that they only annoyed Saeran
  • “The Assistant should still no better. But fine. You know what? She’s not dating you, and clearly she triggered you finding out the truth. So let’s pretend she’s ok? What about the actor? I don’t care that he was drunk. There’s no excuse for him doing that!” The white haired boys voice had become louder and louder, fists clenching tighter and tighter as he began riling up old feelings of betrayal he once felt. “He abandoned you! He left you in the dust and for what? He failed you!”
  • You don’t know when it happened but Saeran had turned towards you and grabbed your hands, squeezing them tight in between his own. His mouth was contorted into some sort of snarl and you saw a fire raging behind his minty eyes. 
  • “Saeran..you’re hurting my hands” You squeaked out.
  • Your small voice dragged him out of whatever memory he was reliving and he sort of faded back into reality with a few blinks of his eyes before turning his attention to his hands. He let go of yours and in a flat voice uttered a “sorry”.
  • You guys were silent again, just staring at the floor, both living in whatever sad memory chose to cross your brains.
  • “You deserve better is all” He finally said.
  • “I know” You replied, voice empty of any real feeling.
  • You looked up, staring at the TV but not actually watching as a man on a horse offered a hand towards a young woman. “I just can’t stop thinking about him. About the him I fell in love with. Is he really gone?”
  • Saeran followed your gaze to the TV, looking on as the girl hopped on the horse. “I think so. That’s assuming he was the guy you thought he was at any point.”
  • “He was.” You said, a little defensive. Saeran looked towards you, watching your emotionless expression, knowing that there was a storm underneath despite the calm appearance. He knew because he often did the same, rocking a stoic appearance while watching all hell break loose in his own head.
  • “Is this the part where I say ‘It gets better’?” 
  • “Do you believe that it does?”
  • “Not a fuckin’ chance” A bitter smirk twisted his lips 
  • “I appreciate the honesty” You sighed
  • “Not in the way that we think it will anyway” He looked off into space somewhere.
  • “Hm?” You turned to him
  • “Everyone imagines that one day soon they’re going to wake up and suddenly it’s not going to hurt anymore. That there’s gonna be a day when you don’t think about this. You’re always gonna think about it. You’re always gonna wonder what you did wrong. Why God hates you. What things would be like if it didn’t happen.”
  • “You don’t think that there can be a day when it all feels ok?” You ask, partially to heal your hopeless heart, and partially because you see Saeran is projecting his own feelings and you’re curious to know how he feels.
  • “Maybe. I haven’t hit it yet though. Doubt I will.” 
  • You stared as he looked off into the distance, feeling as if you could see the scenes of his past playing in his eyes.
  • You were just about to recede back into your ball of depression and hopelessness before he spoke again and took your attention
  • “But that’s me. You’re…you, MC” your questioning look prompted him to continue “You’re…a good person.”
  • “You are to-” You went to say but he cut you off by turning and leaning towards you with a new intensity in his face.
  • “Not like you. If at all” He scoffed. “ You though, everyone loves you. And they’re right too. Because…” suddenly he stopped himself, seeming to turn a little shy.
  • “Because?” You wanted, no, needed to hear this.
  • He gulped down his fear and turned his eyes to the side, unable to look at you as he delivered his next few words, scared of you seeing through him even more than you usually do. 
  • “MC, you’re..everything. You’re smart, you’re cute, and you’re …kind. You always know what to say to help everyone. And that’s the thing. You try to help people, even people trying to hurt you…” His eyes turned back to you “You saw a good in me even when I didn’t. You risked your life to help my brother to save me. You’re…kind of like an angel.”
  • You just stared, taken aback by such kind words, from Saeran of all people. 
  • You were right to be surprised, he wasn’t usually this smooth in conveying his feelings verbally…there must have just been something about you that made it easy for him to talk.
  • “If it gets better for anyone, it’ll be for you, MC” He reached for your hand out of instinct, but pulled back instantly when your skin touched, as if he just realized what he was doing. His eyes did the same, it looked like he just realized how vulnerable he was in that moment, and a sort of wall was raised behind his irises and his whole body tensed a bit.
  • He was scared of being rejected.
  •  …
  • Your hand slowly reached out to his, which was floating in the space between you two, and when he didn’t pull back, you interlaced your fingers together. 
  • A look of awe decorated both of your faces.
  • “Thank you…Saeran.” The light of the TV bounced off your wet eyes, making them look extra glossy.
  • The boy just looked at you, wide eyed, apprehensive for a moment, then nodded and tightened his grip on your hand. It wasn’t the same anger induced bear trap grip from when he grabbed them before. Now it was just firm, reassuring, like a hug.
  • “MC…things will get better for you. If not? I’ll make them.” He gave a subtle squeeze of the hand, giving you the nostalgic feeling of a pinky promise.
  • “You already did.” You let your head, heavy from spinning and sobbing all day, fall on his shoulder.
  • He just looked at you for a moment, before taking a deep breath a pulling you closer, his free hand rubbing your back gently. 
  • Maybe he was wrong
  • Maybe things would get better for him too
2

Sketching non chibi Promptis~

College AU thingy…

Where Prompto never greet Noctis on High school and ended up having the Prince of Lucis as his roommate during his second year on college :D

Idk what Major will Noctis pick.. so I put it as “???” for now

signs as random bad lyrics i wrote
  • aries: "i'm a king, can't you see? i'm the one with royalty."
  • taurus: "ima go fly high in the clouds while loving you."
  • gemini: "i got this brain but i don't know how to use it."
  • cancer: "the moon is my friend and she is the one who understands me. whenever i'm down, she comes over to cheer me up."
  • leo: "be proud as fuck, get it, and don't ya give up, don't do it."
  • virgo: "your lies are never going to be as great as me."
  • libra: "you hit my heart so hard, not painfully. but all i want is you to love me carefully."
  • scorpio: "you know that everyone knows, you're fake as fuck and you gotta go."
  • sagittarius: "no need to hold up, don't need control of love and enjoyment."
  • capricorn: "you showed me what it means to fall deeply in love. this shit is tough."
  • aquarius: "i'm not an angel, i'm a devil who's missing someone to curse from a far."
  • pisces: "keep on imagining all the things you could see in your dreams, feeling free."

anonymous asked:

Hey Squiggly!! I have really low self-esteem and I feel like I don't improve at all with my art, and that I will never achieve my goal of being an animator for pixar studios or some other studio. Have any suggestions to help me see my art is actually worth something? Love your art btw!! ^^ You inspire me greatly and make me want to not give up!! :>

Sure, I’ve got one: remember one thing.

YOU DREW YOUR OWN ART!

You know how even people who are drop-dead gorgeous sometimes don’t realize how attractive they are?  It’s because they see their own face in the mirror every day.  Every.  Single.  Day.  To them, that face is ordinary, so it can’t be special.

Of course, they don’t see what everybody else sees.  Their perspective is warped because they genuinely can’t tell any different.

The same thing goes for art.  Why, you see your own drawing style every time you draw!  Of course it’s not gonna look so great to you – you’re used to it, and it never feels fresh!  But that’s not because it ISN’T fresh, it’s because you’re used to it.  Remember that everybody else is going to see your art differently from how you see it, and that you bring something to the table that nobody else can.  Maybe your art isn’t so special to you, but to somebody else, it’s got that je ne sais quoi that they just can’t seem to find in THEIR art.

Now, that being said, if you really feel that you’re stagnating in your art… why?  Ask yourself that question, and seriously consider it.  Are you drawing the same things over and over again?  Are you tending towards the same stylistic choices each time?  Maybe you’re not pushing your poses or expressions enough, or maybe you’re too afraid of failure to try that style of shading you wish you could do.

Once upon a time, I was afraid of going through the sketch stage in my art, because I thought I wouldn’t be able to clean it up from there.  Now I frequently leave my drawings as sketches intentionally!

The point is, if you feel like you’re plateauing, try something new.  Be aware that you’re likely gonna mess it up, but also be aware that failure is the best way to learn something.

anonymous asked:

How do you feel about Yuzuru Hanyu breaking his record and winning Worlds? I'm curious and want to know another person's feelings about it because I don't know another person to talk about figure skating with. I was so happy for him personally :'D

I got chills seeing him break his own record omg. To go from 5th to 1st is never easy considering the amount of quads and base value that his fellow competitors (ie. Boyang and Nathan) had. He never gave up and laid it all down at the end…i’m so proud of him

anonymous asked:

I've seen you say a couple times that you don't see or that you're disabled. Do you mind talking about it? I ask because I am an aspiring writer and it is really hard for me. I wanted to know how you managed or what it was like?

I don’t mind talking about it. It’s something that made me who I am.

When I was about 12, my health sort of started to eat itself. I suddenly had a ton of allergies, and there were days I couldn’t get out of bed. I got sick all the time. In freshman year of high school, I suddenly couldn’t see. For a long time a thing had been going on in my eyes, but I guess I didn’t think it was abnormal until it made it impossible for me to see. Basically this hole was kind of growing in my eyes, but it was more like a rainbow.

When I started having trouble with colors and detail vision, my mom freaked out a bit, because at the time, I was an award winning artist who had ideas of going to college for art. Then I started tripping over things, hitting my head, having trouble with depth perception. Then I got sick, and I mean sick.

I spent about 23 hours a day in bed. I had almost constant migraines. I had pain in my entire body. My skin turned yellow. I went to every kind of doctor you can think of and was tested for everything there is. One day, I had about 12 vials of blood drawn. No one knew what was wrong. The eyes weren’t that big a deal at first, because it seemed like I might have something really serious. The first couple of eye doctors I went to kind of looked at me and said “Oh it’s nothing big.” I actually had one guy tell me that my brain was just shutting off my eyes because I wasn’t using them properly. Yeah.

Then finally, my mom took me to a friend of our family who happened to be an eye surgeon. She did a free exam. I’ll never forget it because it was the first time anyone believed me. I’d been told by doctor after doctor that there was nothing wrong with me. I’d been referred to therapists, told I needed depression meds, told I was just going through a phase or needed attention. Then this doctor put on her head gear, looked into my eyes…took off the head gear…got new head gear…looked into my eyes…took off the headgear…got hand held tools…looked into my eyes…and then stared at me with her mouth hanging open.

“I can’t see the back of your eye,” she said. And suddenly the world simultaneously healed itself and flipped upside-fucking-down for me.

Then it was all about my eyes, the one symptom we could see happening. The one that was the most dangerous. But by then it was too late.

What happened is pretty simple: I apparently have some weird recessive DNA. It triggers certain bizarre immune issues at puberty. My immune system decided to attack my body. The eyes are a delicately balanced system. They show symptoms first. My immune system attacked them with a vengeance. They swelled up like balloons. Normal eye pressure is about 14-17. Mine was at a 22 at its best. It put a tremendous amount of pressure on my Retina, specifically my macula, cutting off blood flow like when you sit on your foot. You know those little shadowy things that float across your eyes? They’re called protein floaters. My eyes had produced so many of those that the doctor could not see through them. It was a fog.

They had to find a way to map my eye, to track the damage. Cue the eye exam from hell. I have always been, even before my autoimmune disorder, deathly allergic to melon. Any kind of melon. But now I was allergic to all sorts of shit, fruits vegetables, all kinds of crap. My dad is allergic to contrast dyes. So when the retinologist suggested this dye-based eye exam that is kind of like a CAT scan, my mom said “no”. See, they inject you with this dye and then they flash this weird light in your eyes. It causes the dye to glow, and then they can see the things through the fog. My mom told them I was too sensitive to stuff for that to be safe. The doc assured her they’d put a butterfly in my arm, meaning the vein would be kept open, and a syringe of benedryl was set on the counter. They’d never had anyone react, and they needed the pictures or there was nowhere to go from there.

So they put this dye into me, and it was like I’d been injected with fire, but there was no way around it, and to me, I knew they only had about 90 seconds to get the images they needed. So I sucked it up. finally the burning began to spread. Suddenly my back felt like I was being stabbed, and I suddenly couldn’t speak. I tapped my hands on my mom, then began sneezing spontaneously. My mom lifted my shirt, and I had quarter-sized hives. The nurse said “Stop sneezing on the camera”. Yeah.

My mom went ballistic. The doctor flew up the stairs and gave me the emergency meds. I slid into a dissociation state and nearly out of my chair. They had to prop me against the camera for the next couple minutes and reinject the dye. No other way, you see.

They did this test every few months for a few years.

But then there was treatment. Not much they could do, except try to get the swelling under control. Only way to do that was corticosteroid injections in the eye. Yup. A needle in the eye. No, they don’t knock you out. They numb the surface of the eye with the same numbing drops they give you for the exams and then they come at you with a needle, tell you to look down and to hold still. And you fucking do.

I was 15 when that started.

I went to experimental clinics, labs, and joined studies. I dropped out of those. Why? It’s pretty simple. The first day I came to the exams, I was kept waiting for over two hours. I was taken into a room. I was left there. No information, no talking. Suddenly a man came in followed by a group of people, all in lab coats. He started moving me around like I was a doll and talking like, “The patient presents with…the patient this, the patient that…”

I shoved him back and said, “The patient’s name is Kristina, and she is 16.”

He finished his exam, and when he left, after the students had gone, he took two Q-tips, dipped them in that pink shit your dentist uses to swab your gums before an injection, and SHOVED them under my eyelids with a cocky smirk.

The patient will never be an snotty little bitch again, I guess.

So yeah. Fuck those guys. They gave me two injections in one day, which no one had ever done before, because it was almost impossible to function with two pimple-like bubbles on your eyeballs.

Still my health was bad. Then all of a sudden, when my mom had given up, It just wasn’t anymore. Suddenly, I was fine, and all that was left were the eyes. I went back to school, except now I was blind.

In a few months, I’d lost about 80% of my perfect vision. I was photophobic. I got horrible and constant headaches. I walked with a cane. And not a single fucking teacher believed me, except my civics teacher, who had gone blind at a young age due to some other weird eye disorder, and my physics teacher who was deaf. I had teachers send me to the office for wearing my sunglasses (with a note on file). I had teachers get on my case about having an audio recorder and CD player for my books. I had teachers call me names, make fun of me, make me leave class to photocopy their notes larger, so that I missed the lecture the notes were on. I had teachers take my medications which had to be in my possession because of their time-sensitive nature and constant administration and hide them in their desks as punishment for asking questions or demanding help. I had classmates pick on me, but luckily, I was well-liked, and I was an officer in the ROTC. I even excelled there in spite of my vision, because my Captain believed in my leadership skills.

I always tell this story because I think it is funny. We had this special boot camp we got to go to if we were in the upper ranks of the ROTC. If you joined the military after high school (which I could never do) you got a higher paygrade for having gone through it. Almost like taking a couple JC classes in the military. It was grueling and all physical fitness, obstacle courses, PT, classes, guard duty…fucking blah. Our unit was allowed six participants. I sort of figured that it wasn’t really fair for me to go, even with my high rank (a company XO). To my complete fucking shock, my Captain recommended me to go, cutting out a classmate (and ex) of mine who was higher in rank. The boy went ape-shit. He went on and on about how unfair it was. He even went to the school board. My Captain made his reasons clear; he told them that the academy isn’t about military sponsorship. It’s about skills and quality. He didn’t care if I had a disability. In his eyes I had more innate ability than anyone there because I had worked so hard just to be where I was. The boy was angry. I told my Captain I appreciated the gesture, but honestly, we ought to make it fair. I told him that we should train to meet the PT standards, and that if this kid could make his, but i couldn’t make mine, he should go. I made mine. He didn’t. He complained about that too. At the last minute, we were told one extra person could come because another school had lost one. So he came anyway. The whole time he bitched about me being there. When I got there, the real military officers gave me shit like you wouldn’t believe, because they weren’t used to dealing with disabilities or recognizing that they can’t discriminate against high schoolers by law. The commander of the unit tried to dress me down in front of everybody for wearing sunglasses. I was pretty pleased with myself for telling him off but still sounding respectful. He kept saying “Take off my glasses”. I told him they weren’t his. They were mine, by law, and that if he had a problem with that, he could consult my attorney, the DOJ, and the doctor who prescribed them. He tried to fuck with me. I didn’t say anything except to ask him if he wanted me to have a migraine, because that’s what taking the glasses off means. He was so confused by me he walked away and called my Captain over. There were words. After that, he came up to me once or twice, almost like a test, to ask me if I needed him to slow down or if I was getting around alright. He wasn’t being nice. He was egging me in a condescending tone and with very bullying language. He’s a drill instructor, and you know what, that’s his job. I told him I was fine. But I made a decision: I wasn’t just going to make the female PT marks. I was going to test out of this fucking place at the male PT marks. And I fucking did. That boy…had an asthma attack on the track (I had asthma too, but I worked my ass off while he coasted on his “boyness”) and failed. At the certificate ceremony, the commander came up to me and said I had really impressed him, and that it was a shame I couldn’t enter the Navy. I thanked him, but what I wanted to say was, “Go fuck yourself and take the NAVY with you”. I ended up the Battalion XO Senior year. This would have given me a guaranteed spot in Westpoint if I could have taken it. My Captain cried when he told me he was sorry he had to give it to one of our Company XO’s. I told him that it was best for everyone, because I am not the type of person to enjoy taking orders. I had learned that about myself.

He laughed.

Around Junior year I got people to pay attention. My doctors got the DOJ and the Social Security people involved. A woman came to my school and enforced compliance in a tone of voice I’d never heard anyone but my mother use. She threatened to rain brimstone down on them if they didn’t give me what I needed, and things changed.

My parents wanted me to take a full scholarship to a local school, but I wanted to get away. So I did. I wanted to travel abroad, so i did. And when I was 19, they perfected one of the surgeries they had been working on the entire time I’d been struggling with this.

See, the injections had brought and kept the swelling down, but that meant that the fog was still there (since ocular fluid doesn’t replace), and the structures in the eye had been stretched all to shit, and were laying in my eye like melted plastic wrap. The old surgery was like a blind man hacking with a machete, but the new surgery used fluorescent dyes to track movement. Dyes that wouldn’t kill me. The old surgery had a 50-50 shot at complete loss of vision and made you lay on your face for three weeks. The new was fool proof and took 45 minutes. So, I got one eye done. They swapped out all the fluid and replaced it with saline. They peeled the distorted membrane off the macula. They stitched up my eyeball and gave me a sick metal eye patch. Looked like a fucking space pirate. It was rad.

But the blind spot is still there. The cataracts caused by the steroids are still there. The scars are there.

A few years later I had the other one done too.

My college was great. It took a lot of work getting all my reading done, about 500 pages minimum, per week, done via audio. I used to spend hours at the pool table in our residence hall, listening to my books and practicing. I got pret damn good too, at pool. It was difficult taking notes or working with a note taker. It was scary traveling by myself. It was hard to get people to understand there wasn’t anything WRONG with me. Just that my eyes don’t work even though it seems like I’m normal and fine, and like they should. People always think to be legally blind you have to be completely blind, and they think you’re not going to be able to defend yourself. I’ve been targeted by pickpockets. I’ve been followed by scary dudes. I’ve been treated like shit, laughed at, and accused by full grown adults of faking to get privileges, all because I can look at the place where their head should be and smile at the blank spot there. All because I can walk down a flight of stairs with a few neat tricks I know that have nothing to do with a cane.

But shit…you probably didn’t mean to ask for my life story. I’m going to get back to the point. My writing. What has it done for that? Like how can you be a writer if you can’t fucking see? Technology. It’s been amazing. I can use a computer same as anyone. The Kindle has been a fucking revolution for me because for the first time in a decade and a half I could read without pain and suffering. Just…all the things it does have made life so much easier than it used to be. It got me out of bad relationships with people who used my disability as a control. It gave me a little bit of confidence back. It helped me know I could handle myself.

And really, I think my vision loss had a lot to do with my writing. In some ways it gives me different perspective, sure, but it’s more than that. I was undeclared when I entered college. I didn’t know what I wanted to do. I thought about history or sociology. My mom had a degree in that and she was an English teacher. I wanted art history, but what the fuck was the point in that? Couldn’t see a damn thing. And then I had a class in poetry, and shit…That made sense. I’d always loved language and writing. Always been okay at it. Dorte stuff but never thought about doing it for a living. But then it was like yeah…yeah I’m gonna fucking do that. Just like when I decided to meet the male PT standards.

If it is in you. If you love it. If it defines you and possesses you, it does not matter how fucked up you are. You will find a way. You don’t have a choice. You are that thing. And you’ll adapt. You just have to let yourself. You have to keep pushing. You have to learn how to handle frustration. you have to train yourself into stamina. You just keep going. I’m nowhere near as successful as I want to be. I’m still going. I hope I get even better. I hope I can say things that make truth more obvious, or that help people put words to things they have always wanted to say.

I don’t need my eyes to be a fucking firestorm. That’s just me. Eyes don’t mean shit.

So keep going. Keep doing whatever you need to. Do it better and better. Bend yourself around it. People who see you struggle will think they’re lucky, but you and I know the truth: they’re not even close to the kind of strong you are. Not even a little bit.