I just really need prayer. My self-worth is shot. I know that I'm precious God's eyes, but it is so hard to feel like I'm worth anything when continuously reject me. I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't why everyone leaves and takes and takes. I'm trying so hard, but no one ever wants to stay. I'm never good enough.
Dear one, I want you to know that I am saying this with love and coming from a place of understanding.
You are looking at the mirror when you should be looking at the cross. It’s easy to hate yourself when all you see is the reflection of hate, but when you see the reflection of love, that is the cross, you will be changed. When we continue to ignore the beauty of grace, we are confronted with the lie of self-loathing. You are not to put a value on yourself, for it is pride whether you see yourself as more or less. You must be willing to surrender those thoughts to Christ, for when we do, we are renewed. If you are walking and all you are looking at is your feet, you are bound to run of the path, it is when we choose to take the hand of Christ and allow Him to guide us, that we see our true purpose. Our purpose is not seeing ourselves in a loving way, it’s seeing God in a loving way and when two people are in love that love seeks the good of the other, and that is multiplied when we love Christ.
I cannot help you, I can tell you to seek Christ, to read your Bible and pray. But what it really comes down to is what you are willing to give up. Are you going to wake up tomorrow and all of a sudden forget all the hate? Probably not, but you may notice Christ a little bit more each day, until one day you are standing before Him and He says to you “Well done my most beloved and precious child, you made it!”
A journey is never conquered in one day, it takes many mountains before you can get to that place you call Home. This journey will change you, you just have to step out the door and follow Christ.