you don't know you're homestuck

I heard people enjoy shipping random Striders and Vantases together (I believe most of that is @polyglotplatypus‘ doing, because of those comics) and I want you guys to look me in the eye and find a single reason that Kankri and a literal autoresponder made to do nothing but talk is not the single worst ship in history, and somehow simultaneously /painfully/ made for each other.

I blame @hexstuck for this crack ship of the two biggest pricks in the entirety of homestuck.