Imagine Tony taking all the kids under his wings. Spidey, Kamala, Harley... he can't not intervene, "the kids are going to get themselves killed they have no selfpreservation instinct stop laughing Rhodey, no I don't like them but I'm like the first modern superhero and I just know i'm going to be sued if something happens to them, shut up Rhodey" with Rhodey wondering if there's going to be yet another kid hanging out in the labs whenever he visits Tony
God, Tony so absolutely would.
I mean he is already taking care of Harley, who absolutely does not have a self preservation instinct if you think back to IM3, and now he’s also taking care of Peter, who should have a self preservation instinct, even if just because of his spidey sense, but clearly that isn’t working out either.
And then he meets Kamala, who is also doing all this crazy dangerouy stuff and Tony is mentally throwing his hands up in the air, because what the fuck is he supposed to do with that, but in reality he just fusses over all of them.
He simply cannot stay away, and he is pretty sure he can make their comstumes or gadgets or their very own workshop that much better if just anyone would let him. Not that anything would ever stop him from doing the best he can for them.
By now Rhodey is absolutely resigned to this and he has listened to Tony’s triad (“The kids are going to get themselves killed, they have no self preservation instinct, stop laughing Rhodey, no I don’t like them but I’m like the first modern superhero and I just know I’m going to be sued if something happens to them, shut up Rhodey”) more than once by now and he always laughs at Tony but when it comes down to it, he is the first to help Tony come up with a new design.
Whenever he hears about yet another superhero Rhodey already wonders what age they are and if he’s going to find them in Tony’s workshop getting the “I don’t even like you, I just don’t want you killed, no don’t, I’m not your big brother or uncle” speech, that never seems to stick with those kids either, because they spend almost as much time with Tony as they do with their own family.
And despite all of Tony’s protests that he is not interested in them personally, it’s just a matter of security and reputation, he remembers every important test they have, he studies with them if they ask, he makes sure they eat and go to medical after a fight, and he knows all their parents because he needs to know who to call when they stay over, right?
“Stop laughing, Rhodey, I don’t even like them” is a lot less effective when he is in his pyjamas and yelling with Harley and Peter at a screen because of stupid science while he advises Kamala on her nailpolish or hair style.