you do realize that right jess

Not Our “Baby” Sister Anymore

Warnings: None

Characters: Sam and Dean Winchester, Sister Winchester Reader, John Winchester (mentioned)

Summary: Your brothers Sam and Dean realize you already know about hunting, and are actually really badass. (Takes place during Season 1 after Jess dies)

Readers Age: 12 years old

Word Count: 1,049

Y/N: your name

Y/N/N: you nickname

You woke up once again in a small uncomfortable bed of a dingy, old motel room. You pulled off the thick itchy covers and noticed your brothers, Sam and Dean are gone. Probably doing, what was it they called it? Oh right, their “special job”. The thought made a slight smirk appear on your face, you already know what they actually do. They of course don’t know that.

Your dad had told you a couple years back, and later on he started training you too. At that time you were about 8 or 9. Your dad, John Winchester had made you promise not to tell, you still don’t know why. Sometimes you just want to yell it at their faces because it’s annoying to always have to hear their excuses as to why they come back injured.

You pick out your clothes for the day and hop in the shower. You felt as the hot water caressed your bare skin, you relaxed for a second and let your mind clear off. You heard as the door outside opened and heard the familiar voices of your brothers.

When you were finally done you climbed out of the shower and began dressing. You heard hushed whispers coming from outside, you strained your ears to hear what they were talking about.

“Got anythin’ Sammy?” your older brother Dean asked. They were clearly talking about the hunt, you rolled your eyes and continued listening as you put on your clothes.

“First of all that is not my name. And yeah, so get this. So this girl was found dead, she was murdered by this, uh, Jeffrey Michaels. Caught on tape.” Sam half whispered- half spoke. Still looking at his computer.

“So? I mean just a simple murder. Not a real case.” Dean said bluntly, still sceptical about what Sam was saying.

“Jeffrey Michaels is dead. Murdered almost a year ago.” He answered with a tone of accomplishment, proving his older brother wrong.

“Oh, must be a ghost then.” Dean said simply, but you thought it was other wise. You had made your own research when you were alone and you knew enough to know that Jeffrey Michaels was kidnapped and presumed dead. Suddenly all your self control you used to have was gone, you were tired of not being able to help, of doing nothing.

“I think it’s a shape shifter” your brothers jumped when they heard your voice. They both looked at each other, silently agreeing on trying to cover it up. Sam rapidly shut his computer and looked at you like he was confused, Dean sharing his face as well.

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anonymous asked:

I'm really into this whole Jess going away to Portland and then apparently deciding to move out of the loft. It's easy for ppl to take what they have for granted and to suppress their true feelings for a person they see every day. I think that's what Nick's been doing, so he'll need to see what life without Jess looks like before he realizes that it's not a possibility for him. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. I think these last 3 episodes will be something NG has done right this season.

“Absence makes the heart grow fonder.” OMGGGG poetry asfuck my man. No, but you’re couldn’t be more right! I’m excited to see how that’ll play out! I can’t WAAIT for Nick to see and realize what he’s been missing omg 😭❤

Day 7/184

Dear Friends, Peers, & Strangers, 

Today has been an adventure, but it’s my adventure. I can’t help but wonder why everything comes to an end. Not just the good things, but the bad too. When does closure start? A quote immediately comes to mind. “Don’t be sad it’s over, be happy it happened”. I never think of any relationship as a waste, no matter what happens in the time frame. I think of all relationships as a lesson. My relationship with Jesse taught me to always appreciate the small movie like moments in relationships. The one with Miranda taught me to pace myself with whatever I do because things go by quickly. And my recent partner taught me something as well, I just realized today. Give someone your all, no matter what you’ve been through, no matter how scared you are. Life is short and if you spend so much time building walls, you’ll never see what’s right there. Sometimes good things slips aways, and sometimes it’s just the way things were supposed to happen. Sometimes you just have to wave the white flag. 

I went over to my friend Michael’s house to play video games, watch movies and smoke weed. I don’t do drugs a lot, it’s just been a lot recently. It gets me out of my head when I over think. We were just playing Grand Theft Auto V and watching dumb movies. Eating pizza with half my toppings and half their toppings. Hours go by and I check my phone, it’s my previous partner’s cousin. She’s a sweet ally and always supported our relationship. I get a text that reads “Hey. Did you see what Sarah posted on Tumblr?”. I responded “No? What did they post?” and I immediately search up their Tumblr. Michael is too distracted and high to realize that my heart is racing and I am getting super anxious. The post is titled “Moving On”. The post talks about how they love me and how they’ve supported me and risked so much for me. How I stomped on their heart like it was nothing. How I ruined the relationship before it ended and asking how i could be mad for them kissing someone’s cheek at the club and having them tell me. They end the post saying that they will never get back together with me, they aren’t going to read my posts anymore, and that I hope I find someone that treats me perfectly. I tell Michael that I feel like going home and he offers to pay for an Uber. I politely declined. He asked if he could walk me part way and I said I would be fine. I really just wanted to be by myself and walk. It was finally over. 

Next thing I know Im walking down a street with cars zooming past me and to my right I see a playground. I plop down on a bench and pull out my phone. I begin to call Arianna. She picks up “Hey I’m at work, can I call you later?” and I start crying a little, apologize and hang up. I stare up at the clouds for a little bit, watching them shift from one abstract shape to the next. I look back down at my phone and text Rach, a really good friend. I guarantee she will make an amazing Social Worker on day. After texting her back and forth, I continue walking the long way back to my house stoned out of my mind. I call Becca pulling her put of her LGBTQ+ meeting she was running to ramble about how I was feeling. I feel depressed about knowing that I can no longer mend the relationship Sarah and I once had. I go upstairs to change out of clothes that smell like poor choices and sit on the couch. Of course right as I sit down, my family tells me to get up and go for dinner with them. Dinner was boring and average, was my dad’s birthday dinner though. I go for a drive with my sister Drue and talk about the break up. We talk in depth about relationships and Drue talks about how I very happy with them, but how I deserve a mature relationship where I meet the parent and blend with the family. I guess I never got that. 

It’s the final push to do something and not feel like a bad person. I walked into Spencer’s and asked this cute gay chick for her info so I could talk her out sometime. It felt so weird, but I tried to be smooth. She gave me her facebook to talk to her on for the meantime. I don’t plan on dating anyone for anytime soon. But for once I didn’t have this guilt that I took with me when I left Sarah. For the first time in two week, I felt like I could breathe.

So, many of you might realize that I’ve been rewatching Gilmore Girls. I’m doing this in preparation for the Netflix mini series coming in November(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!).

Now I’ve always loved Jess. He has had a special place in my heart since the moment he appeared on my screen. But I’ve just recently realized how much I hated how Lorelai treated him. Well, almost everyone really.

I’m not saying it was right for him to grab a beer and what not (Jess definitely had his own issues he needed to work on), but for Lorelai to tell him that she knew what he was going through just makes me angry. Here’s this 17 year old boy who for his whole life has had to fend for himself. We know this to be true. His dad split not even days after he was born. His mom is a known drug user and is known to go through men that are losers who have stolen all her money. We know that Liz was kicked out of apartments and had to call Luke for help. Jess has been through a shitload of stuff in his 17 years. We know how little Jess thinks of himself. We know all this. His life has been difficult from the start. So Jess has every right to get mad.

He’s listening to Lorelai tell him how she understands when she doesn’t! She never had to worry about what she was going to eat the next day or even for the next meal. She didn’t have to worry about the new man that was sleeping with her mom. Or wonder what her mommy was doing and why the thing she was smoking smelt funny (or maybe even why she was always sticking needles in herself!). She didn’t have to worry about the rent getting paid so they wouldn’t have to sleep outside or in a shelter again. Lorelai did not have to worry about any of that. She had a family that loved her and cared for her. Yes they were overbearing and yes they didn’t understand where she was coming from. But they were there for her. She decided to leave and go out on her own at 16/17. She was the one who chose that. She had that chip on her shoulder and the screw you world attitude because she didn’t like her parents. At least she had parents.

Jess never got a chance or a choice. He had to grow thick skin fast or suffer the consequences. He had to have that screw you world persona to survive. He never had parents. He was most likely the parent. Jess finally got a sense of what it was like to have someone care about him when he came to Stars Hallow. But a lifetime (literally his whole life, with him not being good enough for either of his parents to clean up their acts and be parents) of seeing he wasn’t good enough couldn’t be erased away in a few months. Even when he was in Stars Hallow, everyone hated him except Luke and Rory. The town never gave him a chance. They never asked about his history. They never gave the benefit of the doubt.

Yet, Jess made something of himself. He got his life together. While almost everyone told him he couldn’t, he listened to the two people (and in the end the one person, Rory) that told him he could. That is the best possible reply to everyone the said he was nothing but a hoodlum or the bad kid that would lead your kids to do bad things.

I just have a lot of feelings about Jess Mariano. I will protect him down to the end of days.

Rock ‘n’ roll is love, man. LOVE. Look at yourself: you have become a spreader of hate, brother. Try to be more in life like the persona we all love when you are on stage. Try to spread the love. The real love, the kind that sees right through people’s beards and skin colors and religious shit and garments, the kind that can unite not only a concert crowd but hopefully a nation, a whole world. I hope you can realize how wrong that shit you spread is, hope you can see all the wrong that you are doing.