you dirty old men


All the courtesan-themed chibis from current Tenka battle event…
It’s May, a rainy month and the ajisai is in bloom. You are a beautiful courtesan and a handsome patron seeks refuge from the rain on your door.

This chibi batch is full of mysteries.
1. Why are the cinnamon rolls making those smug faces? *casually side eyeing Masa and Mitsun.
2. Mitsukechi is… Considerably less serious than usual… Not an utter bore after all…
3. Why aren’t you happy Koju and Shingen? You are in your element! You had an oiran-themed event, you dirty old men!
4. Yukkin, where is your nosebleed? Oh, he probably just thought that this is a regular teahouse like Saizo told him…
5. Aren’t you just happy, Inuchiyo? Hahahaha



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Hey so I was wondering...

Somebody made a crack the other day somewhere about 22 or something being “ancient” on Tumblr like its all young people on here, and I thought, nuh uh? Because I have the impression there’s lots of older people on this site? Especially dudes?

So anyway I was wondering - what’s the median age of my followers? Like, are you under 30 or over 30? Young pervs or dirty old men??? Let me know I’m curious!!

Lose Control

Imagine during Negan’s visit to Alexandria, you’re in one of the houses when Dwight comes in. You spot the Angel vest as he leaves causing you to lose control and you tackle him the ground screaming at him to tell you where he got it.

NSFW: Swearing

Everything was so overwhelming, so heart wrenching. Two of your own were dead, Rick had his dignity and leadership ripped from him, and then Daryl was taken away. All because of…one man? One man had all this control? You couldn’t believe it.

“I’m sorry,” Rick mumbled, “I couldn’t fight for Daryl, not then. He…he almost made me cut Carl’s arm off. I-I don’t know if he actually would’ve made me do it but it’s possible. After everything…I know it was possible.”

“I don’t blame you,” you said, reaching for his hand, resting your hand on top of his. Rick stared at your hand but he didn’t grab onto it. You sighed, wrapping up his hand in both of yours, “It’s alright. Was Daryl at least okay? Had they hurt him?”

Rick was hesitant to respond. He avoided eye contact for a while but he knew that silence was just as much of an answer. Your eyes welled up with tears and you gave Rick a nod of understanding, “What…what happened? What did they do to him?”

“It looked like he was shot,” Rick said, “Negan clearly took him for a reason though so I don’t think they’ll let him die, Y/N.”

“At least there’s that I guess,” you said with a sigh, “Still, they won’t exactly be kind to him. They’ve shown us how ruthless they are. Fucking hell I wish it didn’t have to be like this.”

“I know,” Rick replied, nodding slowly. He still had Abraham’s blood splattered across his cheek, some of it washed away by his tears. His blue eyes were empty, a lost expression on his face. Normally he had a plan and reassuring words. But he had nothing now. The road ahead of them was dark and blurry. Anything could happen now.

You and Rick stayed and talked for a while but you decided to let him go and take a shower and get some rest, have some time to process what had happened the night before. And you definitely needed some time alone. And once you were alone in the bedroom you and Daryl had woken up in yesterday morning, you completely broke down and sobbed into your pillow. What would become of Daryl? Negan might keep him alive now but you knew Daryl better than anyone. He was stubborn and he was never one to back down without a fight.

You had your face buried so deep in your pillow, you barely heard the knock on your door. It wasn’t until the door opened that whoever was entering the room had your attention.

“Y/N?” Michonne stood at the doorway, leaning against the doorframe, “I just wanted to check up on you.”

“Thank you,” you said. You took a deep breath and rested your pillow on your lap. Wiping the tears off your cheeks, you chuckled, “It’s been a shitty day. Then again, you’ve had a worse day than I have.”

“It’s been awful for all of us,” Michonne replied.

You nodded in agreement, “Do you think we can make it through this? That we’ll all make it? That we’ll all be together again?”

“I…” Michonne started tearing up which made you start to cry with her, “Honestly, I don’t know. It doesn’t look like Rick’s going to fight it. Not right now anyway.”

“Maybe it’s better we don’t,” you said, “For now at least.”

“I guess so,” Michonne muttered, “But I’m just wondering how worth it it’s gonna be when Negan takes everything we have.”

It was going to be a long week. A week of not knowing if Negan would be satisfied with what you had, if Daryl was okay, if everyone would be ready for Negan’s arrival. Rosita was already on edge and definitely not on board. It was understandable considering she’d just watched Abraham get his skull bashed in. But still, everything needed to go smoothly if everyone else was going to live.

A week turned into three days. Negan arrived with three trucks and dozens of men behind him. Once Rick heard them coming, he begged you to stay inside the house. Seeing the look of desperation in Rick’s eyes, you agreed to stay out of the way. He somehow knew that you probably wouldn’t cooperate as much as you told Michonne you should. It was probably best you stayed out of the way as much as you possibly could.

Your bedroom window gave you the perfect view of the gate and it was difficult watching Negan’s men invade your home. And that’s when you saw Daryl standing there amongst Negan’s men wearing dirty old sweats. Maybe it was all in your head but the sweats made Daryl look so small. You were so tempted to run out there and hold onto him and never let go of him. It was enough to consider leaving with Negan just to be with Daryl.

But you promised Rick you would stay in the house. And that was probably the reason why. He knew you would consider going back with Negan. And he just couldn’t handle losing another member of the group.

“Shit,” you whispered to yourself, feeling the tears well up in your irritated eyes watching Daryl hang his head as Negan laughed and most likely taunted Rick. Soon after, Rick was leading Negan deeper into their community. Daryl was being shoved forward by a greasy looking man with short blonde hair and a burnt face. He was saying something to him but you couldn’t make it out. You pressed your palms against the window and whimpered, “God, what’re they doing to you?”

It was like the blonde man was reading your mind or sensed something with your house as he shoved Daryl towards your front door. You gasped and ran for the stairs, hurrying down to the living room. You needed just one glimpse. Just to know Daryl was alright. And technically you weren’t breaking your promise to Rick. You were staying inside the house.

Daryl entered the house first and he came to an abrupt halt when he laid eyes on you, “Y/N.”

“Keep fuckin’ moving,” the blonde man snapped, roughly shoving Daryl away from the door. He noticed you standing there and he chuckled, pointing his gun at you, “And don’t you go talking to him either. He’s the help. You don’t say a word to him.”

“Fine,” you grumbled. You crossed your arms, clenching your fists as the man smirked and started walking into the house, jabbing Daryl in the back with the gun so he would walk with him. Looking back over your shoulder, you found something that made your blood boil with rage.

That man had the nerve to take Daryl’s vest and wear it. He had no right to wear that vest. That was Daryl’s vest. No one else’s. It was bad enough he had Daryl’s crossbow. But his vest? You snarled under your breath, “You motherfucker.”

“Huh?” the man turned, “What the fuck did you just say?”

“Take that vest off,” you demanded.

“Excuse me?”

“I said take it off!” you screamed. Before you even had time to think, you cried out and tackled the blonde to the ground, your hands on his thin shoulders. You slammed him down repeatedly, your eyes blinded by tears as you screamed incoherently. Daryl stood frozen in shock, unable to do anything but silently watch you let your built up rage out on this man you’d never met until today. He couldn’t even say anything to make you stop unless he wanted to get another beating.

Footsteps came towards the house rapidly until you had a crowd surrounding you. Rick’s arms wrapped around your waist and lifted you off of the man as Negan helped him up. You kicked your legs, demanding to be put down but Rick refused.

“Y/N, stop this!” Rick exclaimed.

“You alright, Dwight?” Negan said, patting this Dwight guy’s back. Dwight nodded, adjusting the vest that had fallen off his shoulder slightly. Negan turned back to you still trying to wiggle away from Rick, “What the fuck happened here?”

“He stole Daryl’s vest!” you yelled, “He has no right! He has no right!”

“Y/N…” Rick sighed.

“Funny,” Negan chuckled, “Because yes he fucking does have a right to take that vest. All of this, all of you belong to me. So this vest here…it’s mine to give.”

“No it isn’t!” you cried, slowly relaxing in Rick’s grip until you were weeping, staring at Daryl’s black eye, the dried blood coming from his nose, his dark hair stuck to his sweaty forehead, “It’s…it’s not. It’s…please put me down.”

Rick carefully put you down and you cried even harder into your hands while Negan just laughed at your pain, “What, is Daryl your boyfriend or something? Is that what’s goin’ on here?”

“Yes,” you squeaked, “I’m…I’m sorry I…”

“Well…tell you what,” Negan said, “You’re lucky you’ve got some good looks on your side. I’m gonna let this little outburst slide just this one time. How does that sound?”

“Alright,” you murmured, “Thank you.”

“You can always come back with us,” Negan said, gesturing to Daryl and the sad, pathetic sweats he had on with the sneakers that were falling apart.

Daryl’s sudden voice shocked everyone, “No!”

Negan slowly turned as Dwight grabbed Daryl by the upper arm and gave him a yank, “I said I’d let it slide this once. Did you not learn from the other night, Daryl? Like I said before, Lucille’s thirsty. You want me to make an example of her too?”

Daryl shook his head and Negan laughed again, approaching you and wrapping an arm around your shoulder, “Good. Some people just never learn.”

You stared at Daryl with your teary eyes and mouthed “I love you” hoping he would understood what you were trying to say. Negan was too busy looking at Rick with a triumphant smirk to notice what you had done. Daryl gave you a nod, though he had Dwight’s complete attention and couldn’t mouth it back. But it was enough that he acknowledged it.

“Alright then,” Negan said, “Let’s keep going we don’t have all day. Dwight, let’s go. We’ve got guns to collect.”

With a nod, Dwight pushed Daryl towards the door and he obeyed, keeping his head down as he did. As Dwight passed you, he snickered, pulling lightly on the vest, “Most comfortable vest I’ve ever worn.”

Rick grabbed your shoulder before you could react, “Don’t, Y/N. We can’t risk Daryl’s life.”

You nodded, waiting for everyone to leave. You slapped your hand over Rick’s, the sudden contact surprising him. You allowed a few more tears to fall before you calmed yourself down and declared, “I’m not sure I can sit by and cooperate anymore, Rick.”

“I know,” Rick mumbled, “But…we have to.”

You joined Rick outside once Negan had finished taking what he wanted from them. His men were loading up the trucks as Dwight kept a tight grip on Daryl. After his outburst earlier, Dwight was a lot more aware of every move Daryl made, especially when he found out your relationship with him.

“I’d like it if Daryl could stay,” Rick said.

“Not a chance,” Negan retorted. Turning to you, he got another malicious grin on his face, “You plannin’ on begging?”

“What’s the point?” you said, “Seems you just find my devastation amusing. I’m not playing that game with you.”

“I like her,” Negan said. He turned to Daryl and pointed at you, “You picked a good one, you know that, Daryl? I could bring her back with us for the night, you can enjoy her one last night, everyone wins!”

“Sick,” you scoffed.

“Y/N,” Rick said sternly.

“Just thought I’d make this separation easier on the both of them,” Negan chuckled, “A good roll in the hay one last time.”

Daryl’s cheeks turned red and he looked away to avoid letting Negan and Dwight see his discomfort with the situation. Negan let out a loud laugh, throwing his head back.

“Just a suggestion,” Negan said.

“A terrible one,” you retorted.

“Well then, looks like that’s our cue to leave you guys let’s get outta here!” Negan called out. As he walked out the gate, he turned to you and the rest of the group, though he mostly made eye contact with you, “I’ll see all of you very, very soon.”

Thanks for reading! I hope this turned out okay and you liked it :) <3

good morning

Sherlock looking across the sitting room at John eating breakfast with the morning light in his hair, smiling to himself, and John looks up with a little bit of egg on his lip and says, “What?” and Sherlock goes over to him and leans in close like he’s going to kiss him and John closes his eyes and puckers up and then Sherlock says, “My god, you are such a sloppy eater,” and brushes the egg off and they both crack up laughing and John catches Sherlock around the waist and pulls him into his lap and smirks, “you weren’t complaining about it last night though, were you?”