you cant be 20

phantom-mizero  asked:

I headcanon that Black Hat got really into couponing, after he employed the rest of the crew. Feeding 2 humans and a bear has to cost a lot and he would most likely try not to use so much money on groceries and stuff. It would basically end with: “No, Demencia, we are NOT going to buy this chocolate bar, we don't have a coupon for it. You have to do it with your own money.” 1/2

They would always leave with giant loads of groceries and other various things, for just a few dollars as payment. It’s basically legal stealing! Also there had to be a few incidents were they didn’t take some coupons for some reason and ended up with an angry Black Hat and a hero trying to resolve the drama one way or another, while the rest of the crew watched things from afar. 2/2

HJOsHOYLT FUCKFING SHIT

  • Black Hat is basically just an angry old grandma who spends hours in front of the fireplace in a rocking chair cutting up a newspaper. with his claws. fuck scissors am i right.
  • by the time he’s done there’s a stack of coupons big enough to stuff a briefcase. which is exactly where they go into. gotta carry your coupons in style
  • some of these are incredibly useless?? “Save $5 dollars off any $200 or more purchase?? Expires tonight?? HOLY FUCK!!!!” but you can bet he’ll teleport straight into sears or wherever the fuck it is, impulse purchase the nearest thing, and throw the coupon in the cashier’s face
  • so onto the store: You gotta get the essentials first. bread, some meat, cheese?… lettuce, uh, an apple. sardines. bubblegum. what do humans eat again??
  • BH just has 5.0.5 do it normally, since Flug would straight up blow their food budget on Mountain Dew, 5 hour energy, and coffee and Dementia would just raid the $1 candy isle.
  • But meanwhile BH’s gotta find the frozen food isle because “TWO boxes of frozen fish stick for the price of ONE!?!? THIS IS THE MOST DIABOLICAL THING I’VE EVER SEEN!”
  • “these savings are positively evil” BH claims as he buys five tubs of greek yogurt
  • “EXCUSE ME DO YOU WORK HERE” “Oh shit he’s back– hello sir h-how can i help y–” “WHERE DO YOU KEEP YOUR KALE CHIPS. DO YOU SELL THEM HERE.” “Snacks are in isle 9.″ bh fucking nyooms off
  • WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS EXPIRED LAST WEEK

Y’all are making Black Hat so…….. edgy…….. (I love this)

自分の携帯で写メ全然とってなかった…!!もらいものお姉さんズ〜!川島のレッスン着はアニメのだよ〜  峰‏ @mine_seventeen

2

More merch for me! I ordered some stuff by @aileine from Redbubble (a mug, a notebook, some stickers, a print, a pillow) and I’m the happiest bean rn because my Eruri-collection keeps growing and seriously…her stuff is amazing and looks awesome on the products *__*. The quality itself is also very good!

If only the Eruris themselves could keep away from my stuff =__=

They take couple-baths in my tea (til Erwin farts at least)…

…and they try to take glances at my notebook. Those fuckers.

6

When Park Jimin gets flustered over Jeon Jungkook’s excessive boldness…

(or when Jeon becomes too agressive it scares the hell out of Park Jimin)

My mom’s talking to some auntie about how she was told by another auntie a long time ago, that you have to get girls married by 18-20, or else you cant control them (as in you can’t get them married off at all) or they have so many demands that you can’t get them married off.

So you have to get girls married off early, because otherwise they might wake up and realize they deserve better men or not to be with men at all. And everyone is piss scared that women will choose not to be with men.

Tell me again women aren’t forced from birth, groomed from birth to eventually be with men.

anonymous asked:

So I just want to say thank you for drawing Bakugou the way you do. As a closeted trans male, it means a lot to me to see this representation. And the way you talk about it too, is so nice. You talk about it like it's not a big deal, which is how it should be. For you, Bakugou is trans, that is the way he is, and that doesn't make him special or anything, it's just so normal and I appreciate that so much. I don't want to make it a big deal or anything, but it does mean a lot to me so thank you

hhhhhhh i’ve written like 20 different responses to this and gone back and forth on whether i should post it, cause i dont wanna seem like im giving myself props for something that should be completely normal, BUT,, i just, want people to see, this is why it’s so important my dudes

Dear Hoteps

The majority of Africans currently born in the Americas are from WEST and CENTRAL Africa. There is nothing wrong with celebrating the greatness of Black Egypt (as they are your distant ancestors) but you are not Egyptian. 

If you cant name off at least 20 African countries, 5 different African cultures, 5 historical kingdoms, events, and/or leaders, and 5 different resources from around the African continent; one from each African region (North, South, East, West, and Central), all off the top for your head; you don’t know shit about your people. 

If you take the time to research the rest of the continent you will also find that some of your restricting ideologies of black women and black LGBT are of European descent and not pro black.


Gender roles were diverse in precolonial Africa.  Many African cultures ran on a matriarchy as well as a patriarchy. Black women had their own organizations, government systems, and even ran economies. In some cultures, women were fighters, warriors, and frontliners. They weren’t bound to stand behind men. Many African cultures saw women as the closest thing to “god” and certain spiritual practices, such as libations, were poured only by women.This was a mindset destroyed by European conquest. In the fight to reclaim our cultural identity, African women have the right to choose the state of being that caters to both their blackness and womanhood. If a woman decides to respectfully stand in front, beside, or behind a man, that is her ancestor approved right. If you preach against this, you are not pro black. You are pro black man….barely. Real men of substance are not so easily threatened. 


LGBT is not foreign to Africa, it was there before colonialism. Africans are not new to sex, something established by NATURE, not by man. Africans, ***INCLUDING THE EGYPTIANS****  explored sex within and outside their gender. Africans were able to identify with genders outside their own, and their community would honor that. Polygamy and Polyandry existed before European presence. As did cross-dressing. European conquest promoted LGBT-phobia through CHRISTIANITY. Who is going to Africa RIGHT NOW preaching hate, and VIOLENCE towards the LGBT community? The church. You give Europeans too much power. You honestly think they created something as basic as sexual orientation? In the fight to reclaim our cultural identity, black people have their ancestor approved right to be ALL of who they are. If you preach against this, you are not pro black. You are pro black heterosexual…..barely, a heterosexual person of substance is not so easily threatened. 


You still hide behind European ideologies, because it puts you on top. Community and family structure are important but we knew how to respect an individual for who they were. You are not pro black, you are not pro hotep, you are simply a disgrace to your ancestors because you are still pro colonialism.

These are just a few things wrong with your “hotep” notion. However, I wont undermine an attempt at restoring our cultural roots, so a word of advice: bring that crazy back a bit, live and let live (ONE OF THE MOST SUPREME AFRICAN PRINCIPLES), and start digging deeper. You are only brushing the surface. 


Igbo, Tuareg, Masai, Akan, Mbundu,  Bene, Bulu, Fang, Jaunde, Mokuk, Mwele, Ntum and Pangwe, Nilotico Lango, Bahima, Azande, Kiisi, Banyoro, Langi, Nuer, Kuria, Benin, Cape Bantu, Kikuyu, Egba, Dahomey, Yoruba, etc, etc, etc, etc, ETC, ET CETERA.

Existing

A BTS/ Kim Seokjin Fanfiction

Summary: He looked like an angel, and spoke like a singer. Next to you, a university student surviving on 5 hours sleep a night, and holes in your shoes, he seemed to have it all. But at the end of the day, you were both just Existing. You just cant help but think, it might be more fun to Exist together…

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21

Chapter 21

‘Is there anything you cant do?’ you mumble around your mouthful of food as your eyes continue to wonder around the breakfast Jin had made you, all the colours, shapes and smells of everything laid out making your stomach continue to grumble interestedly despite having already eaten 1/3 of it.

‘…I mean…I cant dance very well.’ He murmurs as he watches you eat with a smile, accepting the bite you offering him every now and again, but for the majority simply sitting there with his chopsticks poised, and getting full on the sight of you happily eating the food he’d prepared for you.

‘Well we both know that’s a lie, after the way you performed last night.’ You point out, shaking your head amusedly and missing the way his eyes flash excitedly at your comment, just before he reaches over to wipe a spot of sauce from the corner of your lip as he responds.

‘Actually, im the worst dancer out of all of us…but it makes me happy that you still seem to think I can dance.’ He murmurs, smiling at you when you dip your head slightly in embarrassment at having been caught with food on your face, before leaning back and smiling to himself before proceeding to eat.

‘…if you consider yourself a bad dancer, then you clearly haven’t seen someone like me dance.’ You murmur, internally cringing at some of the memories you had of awkward times when you’d been called out for how bad your dancing was, and only just catching Jin’s intrigued grin before he suddenly stands up and walks around the table to offer you his hand.

‘What are you doing?’ you ask, not hesitating as you set your chopsticks down and let him pull you up, but soon wishing you hadn’t been so eager when he pulls his phone out of his pocket and after a few moments one of the same songs that you’d heard the night before begins to blast from the speaker.

‘Im going to teach you how to dance.’ He explains, grinning at you cheekily, and raising his eyebrows daring you to object when he sees your mouth open to argue, before quickly spinning you into his arms with your back to his chest, and you find your wrists shackled by his long fingers.

‘Jin!’ you whine as he begins to throw your arms about, but you couldn’t find it in you to get truly mad at him, when he proceeded to say the rap in your ear as his chest rubbed against your back, and chuckles kept escaping him whenever you’d almost fall over together.

‘Have I told you how cute you look in my jumper?’ he suddenly asks, pulling you to a momentary stop as he forces you to acknowledge his question.

‘No-‘

‘Well you look utterly adorable.’ He murmurs, grinning against your cheek, before pulling you quickly into the next move an leaving you breathless.

Before long he had you in fits of laughter, upgrading to singing the song against the skin of your neck as he made your body move, and even though you were utterly breathless with the smell and feel of him all around you, you couldn’t help but have the thought that that moment was pure heaven.

But today, heaven was filled with Devils.

‘What are you two doing?’

Namjoon’s voice interrupting the moment has you both sucking in a shocked breath as you look up to see him stood in front of you where he’d been on his way to the kitchen, a confused frown pulling at his brow, that somehow had become contorted with a smirk.

‘Uh….’ You mutter, looking beside you at Jin to see his eyes dancing over the floor whilst his cheeks were beaming a rosy pink, before you look back at the man before you with a sheepish grin.

‘We were…just eating breakfast-‘

‘…sure you were…we’ll Im going to go and make myself some coffee, so you two go back to-…doing whatever you were doing.’ He scoffs, shaking his head in bemusement before disappearing into the kitchen.

‘Maybe its time to leave.’ You whisper to Jin beside you once Namjoon was out of earshot, seeing him chuckle quietly to himself and dip his head to smother his grin in your neck, before leaving a lingering kiss against your skin, and standing up properly once again.

‘I think that would be a good idea.’

‘You know…after last night…I have a few questions.’ You state suddenly as Jin pulls out into the early morning traffic, his hand already having laid yours on the stick shift so that he could lay his over the top.

‘Such as?’ he muses as he switches lanes, a soft distracted smile on his face.

‘Well…for starters, how long have you been an idol?’ you ask, shifting in your seat to face him properly so that you could watch all of his expressions as he answers you, despite his eyes staying mostly on the traffic- although you smiled every time he turned his head momentarily to look at you.

‘I think its about…6 years now- although that’s including training as well, so technically only 4.’

‘And do you do anything besides work?’ you ask, grinning when he raises an eyebrow at your strange line of questioning, before simply smiling confusedly.

‘I enjoy playing video games, and I collect a few figurines.’ He murmurs, watching you from the corner of his eye to gauge your reaction, but you simply nod thoughtfully.

‘And did you live in Seoul before?-‘

‘Mhm, im a Seoul boy.’ He smiles, his thumb stroking over your knuckles distracting you momentarily before you blurt out your next question.

‘How much money do you get?-‘

‘Yah! Is this a dating profile, or are you trying to steal from me?’ he chuckles, surprised at your sudden invasiveness, and all you can do is bite your lip sheepishly and shake your head as you respond.

‘I didn’t mean it like that- …I just know that idols haven’t got a reputation for earning a lot for their first few years, and I was worried about how much you pay for things for me.’ You explain, frowning to yourself as you try to imagine how you could have phrased the question better.

‘Hey….I told you you didn’t have to worry about that didn’t I?’ he murmurs quietly, dragging you out of your thoughts so that you could peer up at him to see him looking over at you where he’d pulled up to your dorm, your obliviousness to your surroundings revealing just how deep in thought you’d been.

‘I know….I’m just so used to looking after myself, especially out her on my own in Seoul, that it worries me when other people try to pay for my things, or look after me.’ You explain quietly, drawing your eyes away from your dorm building out your window and turning to see him watching you with a thoughtful expression, before he leans his head back on the seat and smiles at you softly

‘That’s understandable….but I think you should let me look after you for now….I don’t plan on letting you go any time soon.’ He murmurs, letting go of your hand on the stick shift to reach his fingers over to trail gently over your lips.

‘Your my princess, and I am your prince.’

(T.B.C)

anonymous asked:

"Lexa, for every mile you run I'll give you an orgasm—LEXA YOU CANT RUN 20 MILES RIGHT NOW IT'S THE MIDDLE OF WINTER"

“You owe me fifty orgasms”
“You’re in the hospital”

Existing

A BTS/ Kim Seokjin Fanfiction

Summary: He looked like an angel, and spoke like a singer. Next to you, a university student surviving on 5 hours sleep a night, and holes in your shoes, he seemed to have it all. But at the end of the day, you were both just Existing. You just cant help but think, it might be more fun to Exist together…

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21

Chapter 21

‘Is there anything you cant do?’ you mumble around your mouthful of food as your eyes continue to wonder around the breakfast Jin had made you, all the colours, shapes and smells of everything laid out making your stomach continue to grumble interestedly despite having already eaten 1/3 of it.

‘…I mean…I cant dance very well.’ He murmurs as he watches you eat with a smile, accepting the bite you offering him every now and again, but for the majority simply sitting there with his chopsticks poised, and getting full on the sight of you happily eating the food he’d prepared for you.

‘Well we both know that’s a lie, after the way you performed last night.’ You point out, shaking your head amusedly and missing the way his eyes flash excitedly at your comment, just before he reaches over to wipe a spot of sauce from the corner of your lip as he responds.

‘Actually, im the worst dancer out of all of us…but it makes me happy that you still seem to think I can dance.’ He murmurs, smiling at you when you dip your head slightly in embarrassment at having been caught with food on your face, before leaning back and smiling to himself before proceeding to eat.

‘…if you consider yourself a bad dancer, then you clearly haven’t seen someone like me dance.’ You murmur, internally cringing at some of the memories you had of awkward times when you’d been called out for how bad your dancing was, and only just catching Jin’s intrigued grin before he suddenly stands up and walks around the table to offer you his hand.

‘What are you doing?’ you ask, not hesitating as you set your chopsticks down and let him pull you up, but soon wishing you hadn’t been so eager when he pulls his phone out of his pocket and after a few moments one of the same songs that you’d heard the night before begins to blast from the speaker.

‘Im going to teach you how to dance.’ He explains, grinning at you cheekily, and raising his eyebrows daring you to object when he sees your mouth open to argue, before quickly spinning you into his arms with your back to his chest, and you find your wrists shackled by his long fingers.

‘Jin!’ you whine as he begins to throw your arms about, but you couldn’t find it in you to get truly mad at him, when he proceeded to say the rap in your ear as his chest rubbed against your back, and chuckles kept escaping him whenever you’d almost fall over together.

‘Have I told you how cute you look in my jumper?’ he suddenly asks, pulling you to a momentary stop as he forces you to acknowledge his question.

‘No-‘

‘Well you look utterly adorable.’ He murmurs, grinning against your cheek, before pulling you quickly into the next move an leaving you breathless.

Before long he had you in fits of laughter, upgrading to singing the song against the skin of your neck as he made your body move, and even though you were utterly breathless with the smell and feel of him all around you, you couldn’t help but have the thought that that moment was pure heaven.

But today, heaven was filled with Devils.

‘What are you two doing?’

Namjoon’s voice interrupting the moment has you both sucking in a shocked breath as you look up to see him stood in front of you where he’d been on his way to the kitchen, a confused frown pulling at his brow, that somehow had become contorted with a smirk.

‘Uh….’ You mutter, looking beside you at Jin to see his eyes dancing over the floor whilst his cheeks were beaming a rosy pink, before you look back at the man before you with a sheepish grin.

‘We were…just eating breakfast-‘

‘…sure you were…we’ll Im going to go and make myself some coffee, so you two go back to-…doing whatever you were doing.’ He scoffs, shaking his head in bemusement before disappearing into the kitchen.

‘Maybe its time to leave.’ You whisper to Jin beside you once Namjoon was out of earshot, seeing him chuckle quietly to himself and dip his head to smother his grin in your neck, before leaving a lingering kiss against your skin, and standing up properly once again.

‘I think that would be a good idea.’


‘You know…after last night…I have a few questions.’ You state suddenly as Jin pulls out into the early morning traffic, his hand already having laid yours on the stick shift so that he could lay his over the top.

‘Such as?’ he muses as he switches lanes, a soft distracted smile on his face.

‘Well…for starters, how long have you been an idol?’ you ask, shifting in your seat to face him properly so that you could watch all of his expressions as he answers you, despite his eyes staying mostly on the traffic- although you smiled every time he turned his head momentarily to look at you.

‘I think its about…6 years now- although that’s including training as well, so technically only 4.’

‘And do you do anything besides work?’ you ask, grinning when he raises an eyebrow at your strange line of questioning, before simply smiling confusedly.

‘I enjoy playing video games, and I collect a few figurines.’ He murmurs, watching you from the corner of his eye to gauge your reaction, but you simply nod thoughtfully.

‘And did you live in Seoul before?-‘

‘Mhm, im a Seoul boy.’ He smiles, his thumb stroking over your knuckles distracting you momentarily before you blurt out your next question.

‘How much money do you get?-‘

‘Yah! Is this a dating profile, or are you trying to steal from me?’ he chuckles, surprised at your sudden invasive-ness, and all you can do is bite your lip sheepishly and shake your head as you respond.

‘I didn’t mean it like that- …I just know that idols haven’t got a reputation for earning a lot for their first few years, and I was worried about how much you pay for things for me.’ You explain, frowning to yourself as you try to imagine how you could have phrased the question better.

‘Hey….I told you you didn’t have to worry about that didn’t I?’ he murmurs quietly, dragging you out of your thoughts so that you could peer up at him to see him looking over at you where he’d pulled up to your dorm, your obliviousness to your surroundings revealing just how deep in thought you’d been.

‘I know….I’m just so used to looking after myself, especially out her on my own in Seoul, that it worries me when other people try to pay for my things, or look after me.’ You explain quietly, drawing your eyes away from your dorm building out your window and turning to see him watching you with a thoughtful expression, before he leans his head back on the seat and smiles at you softly

‘That’s understandable….but I think you should let me look after you for now….I don’t plan on letting you go any time soon.’ He murmurs, letting go of your hand on the stick shift to reach his fingers over to trail gently over your lips.

‘You’re my princess, and I am your prince.’

(T.B.C)