you can tell i'm really at my wit's end when i start drawing again


The locker room was clearing out. It was almost completely quiet when Ginny stomped through to her broom closet. So the sound of her glove whacking thickly against the wall was more than audible. The next sound that followed was Lawson’s grunting as he pounded by her door. Ginny swallowed the swears on her tongue and licked her bottom lip into her mouth.

It had been three weeks since their blowout. Three weeks of his cold shoulder and her silent glares. He was upset but she couldn’t even say if it was actually at her or something else he wouldn’t talk about. Either way he only seemed to get angrier every time he saw her with Duarte which only infuriated Ginny further. That wasn’t her fault, she could do nothing about him feeling that way, and still his anger angered her.

On this particular occasion, Mike had overheard Duarte teasing her about going out for a drink with him, a game her spare Pitcher had begun playing with her almost immediately upon the win of their first game, and Mike had waded away only to confront her later on about being inappropriate. Usually the two of them were good about keeping their disagreements to the two of them, but this fight had a witness and soon after Ginny had stormed away, Livan had followed.

“I didn’t know you and Lawson were a thing.” He stated after the closet door clicked shut behind him. She threw a nasty look over her shoulder at him as he leaned casually against the wall with his arms crossed.

“Were a what?”

“You’re sleeping together.”

“Are you on drugs? We’re friends. If that.”

“We’re friends, mijita. That’s not what the two of you have.”

“Did that out there look like a relationship to you?”


“All this is funny coming from you.I think that woman from the bar last night makes five this week.”

“Thats sex, Mami. Not dating.” He laughed and she rolled her eyes while crossing to snatch up her glove though her insides had begun to fizzle like a freshly opened soda. He was wearing a smirk that made his dimples look like craters when she returned her eyes to him. He shrugged “and maybe you see friends but I think Lawson’s mind is somewhere else. Almost like he’s jealous.”

“We’re just friends. That’s it.”

“That’s too bad. Sex with Lawson might’ve helped you.”

She scrunched up her face in an expression she hoped looked more perplexed than nervous as he crossed the room to sit the wrong way around on her chair. “Helped me with what?”

“Your tension.”

“Ha…I don’t hav- I’m not tense.”

“When is the last time you had sex?”

“What?” She balked pausing in the middle of stepping out of her cleats. He folded his arm over the back of the chair, and then rested his chin on top of them so that he could grin up at her.

“A long time, yes?”

“I can’t tell if you’re joking or not.”

“Am I wrong?”

“Yes!…I don’t know. Why are we even having this conversation?” She replied before chucking her shoes into her cubby. She moved to half hazardously twist her hair up onto the top of her head, and could hear him chuckle to himself.

“I told you about my girlfriend back home.”

She threw a smile over her shoulder. “That was information you offered up on your own.”

“It’s cool, we don’t have to talk about it. I’m just surprised is all.”

Ginny was well aware that he was baiting her but she couldn’t help herself. His interest was refreshing and she was actually having some much needed fun. So this time she spun all the way around. “Alright, I’ll play. Surprised about what?”

“Tranquilo, mama, it’s not a bad thing.”

“I know it’s not. I still want to know.”

“You’re not what I expected.” He stated simply. He kept a tight hold on the chair as he leaned back in a stretch, and Ginny could hear the metal groan under the shift of his weight. She noted the way his biceps rippled beneath his sleeves.

“Is that right?”

“Yea, I imagined you were the type that knows what she wants and isn’t afraid of that.”

“Are you making your point soon?”

He sat up like a stretched rubber band had been released. “I saw those that photoshoot, Mami. You’re confident with your body; I’m think you’re confident in how to use it too. So why don’t you?” He asked, absentmindedly using his thumb to run the length of his bottom lip.

“It’s not a need.”

“So where do you put all of that pent up energy? You’re an athlete. You’re in peak physical shape and are practically made up adrenaline, endorphins, and three meals a day. Getting on the bike doesn’t always help with all that restlessness.”

“How like a man to think sex solves the problem.” She scoffed over the dull thud of her fingertips drumming against the glove still her hands. He chuckled and shook his head.

“You don’t really think about yourself outside of all of this, do you? I’m not just talking about your hobbies cause you don’t look like you have any-”


“I’m talking about your needs.”

“What do you know about my needs?”

“I know you need to loosen up.”

She couldn’t disagree with this which is probably why she was nodding before fully realizing it. She straightened. “There are other things that can help me relax. Like reading or shopping.”

“Do you really do those things?”

“I don’t have time.”

“You mean you don’t make time.”

She pursed her lips in indignation before sucking her bottom lip into her mouth. “Why do you care?”

“Your frustration is distracting.” He said matter of fact and she snorted.

“Don’t be an idiot.”

“I can almost taste it.”

“Oh yea, and what does that taste like?”

“A little sweet, a little sour.” He described and instantly they were having a different conversation. An anticipation littered the rooms atmosphere like fire flies at night. She blinked at him for a few moments and then shook her head.

“Well, I appreciate your concern, but I think I’m good.”

“Okay.” He said casually as he rocked backwards. She balled up her shirt and threw it at him.

“I’m serious.”

“I didn’t say you weren’t.” Livan laughed as he dodged the assault. Ginny set her hands on her hips.

“But you don’t believe me?”

“Do you believe you?”

“And what’s your solution? I have sex with you?” She jested, and was only partially shocked when his smirk ignited slowly until again his dimples were deep pools. Her mouth fell open as an incredulous laugh popped out of her mouth. “Really, Duarte?”

“I doesn’t have to be me.”

“But you’re offering?”

“As a concerned friend and teammate.”

Ginny could feel her face warm. “Wow.”

“It doesn’t have to be sex. There are other ways for me to relieve your tension.”

“You are bold.”

“You’re not saying no.” He replied pointedly and she didn’t see the point in lying.

“I don’t know if I want to.”

“Yea?” He questioned teasingly before pushing himself out of the chair. Ginny kept still as he crossed to her like she were witnessing a lion on the hunt from the prey’s point of view.

“I want to see how far you’ll actually take this.”

“As far as you’re comfortable with.” He stated bluntly as he snuck closer. She hummed her amused suspicion as the back of her shirt grazed the cold surface of the wall. She felt her body respond when he stopped only inches from her. Still he hung back to survey her. “Do you even know what you like, Ginny?” He asked and it was a genuine question. She raised an eyebrow, a strange dizziness setting in, and then shook her head.

“It’s been awhile since I’ve worked that particular muscle.” She said. The thick glove still in her hand now felt like a weight, but she clung to it like safety net. “I’d need someone to help me reach it. You know…apply the right kind of pressure.” She added and the implication rang in the air.

Livan didn’t celebrate his win, he didn’t even put on that smug face he’d worn from the moment he’d stepped foot in the clubhouse, he just took her by the waist one hand at a time and edged closer. Ginny nearly cried out when he turned her to face the wall. He pressed himself against her and she could feel his lips on the back of her neck; drawing a line towards the soft skin behind her left ear.

“I got you, Mami.” He said quietly and she could practically hear the smile in his voice. His left hand kept her pressed firmly to him while the right snaked around the front to disappear beneath the smooth fabric of her panties. He used two fingers to make circles around her center and the nerve endings began firing off like controlled explosives. Her knees nearly buckled but Livan was able to keep her on her feet; never stopping his rhythm.

Ginny let her head tip back to rest on his shoulder; exposing more of her throat for his mouth to explore. After just a few minutes, Livan’s other hand found its place beside the other before blazing a trail further between her thighs to dip a fingertip into her center. The room swam, and she muffled a moan by biting down on her glove. It clattered to the floor when he drove a second finger deeper within her, and curled it upwards ever so slightly. Ginny splayed her own hands on the wall in a struggle to steady herself. Only nothing felt solid enough. It was almost as if she were melting into him.

The sudden hard knock on the door was like a crash landing. Livan threw a hand over her mouth and both fought to stifle their laughter as they nearly toppled over together. Still, he somehow kept control, lowering them both to the floor, and pulling her into his lap. He kept his hand over her mouth, the other one continuing its work, while the knocks sounded again. Mike’s voice floated through.


Ginny tried to focus on the words he was saying but Livan was now handling her at such a pace that the heated vibrating that had started behind her naval had spread throughout her body, and burst from nearly every pore.

“C'mon, Ginny. I’m sorry.” Mike grumbled. Livan chuckled in her ear as she deflated into him, and took his hands back.

“Do you want me to answer for you? Tell him you’re stretching?”

“Careful, Duarte. I might start to think you’re using me just to get under his skin.” Ginny replied breathlessly. She hadn’t actually expected to feel relief and now that she could hear Mike’s voice, part of her was already insisting she feel guilt, but in this moment she was weightless. Still she waited to hear Mike’s voice and only caught the sound of his footsteps fading as they moved away. Livan nudged her.

“Are you complaining?”

Ginny snorted and shook her head as she sprawled out in his lap. She already knew what he would want in return. Livan raised his eyebrows expectantly.

“Just say it. You know you want to.”

“I’m not calling you Papi.”