hey um so i'm a few years into college and i'm still kinda new to the whole dating thing. i've dated a few guys in the past but the most i've done is kissing and those guys all ended up breaking my heart really bad (yikes). i'm really shy and introverted and honestly kind of a shut in but i really want to get out there and meet guys ya know? i was wondering if you had any advice as to how i'd go about doing that. tysm 💖
um tbh i dont know what to say bc i’ve literally never been shy my entire life. my issues with dating have been because the guy is a total asshole or because the guy is way too introverted lol. but do you use tinder? it’s probably the easiest/quickest way to set up multiple dates that could give you good practice at the very least.
i guess my advice is to interact with the person before meeting e.g. texting so you can know a bit more about who they are and what they like, which might ease initial tensions on a first date and you can also determine whether or not your expectations align. don’t try to be an extrovert if that’s just not you, but honestly like really really try to converse and be open!! i really hate it when i can’t move past small talk because a dude is too closed up, and then i end up oversharing to fill the holes in the convo.
and then choose something casual for your date like a drink (watch your bartender pour it) or a coffee so you can escape if need be. if you go out for food, it’s a longer process where you have to wait, order, wait, eat, wait, pay, etc. you’re trapped if service is slow lmao.
just keep in mind that dating is a tedious process and you’re not likely to meet your soulmate immediately. there’s lots of flops along the way as you’ve experienced so i wouldn’t stress over it or invest in anyone before meeting them. i don’t believe in forcing/faking anything so i mean if you’re not comfortable enough with the person to make a good connection then that’s the way it is and you keep trying with different people.