you can feel the shame

scared kids on tumblr anxious during the inauguration of trump: *have one (1) good feeling about obama*

you demons: *clog the dash with every terrible thing he has ever done, as if we are unaware, specifically and purposefully to take that good feeling away, because you are fucking demons*

When bae texts you and you just stand there smiling at the notification 

Addiction is not pretty girls sniffing cocaine on glass tables in low-cut dresses and drinking expensive liquor that you cant even pronounce.

Addiction is not a “quirk” that you can add to characters in your fan-fiction, to make them tragedy.

Addiction is that feeling of relief when your paycheque comes in, even if its supposed to pay your rent.

Addiction is watching your face hollow out, following suit with your mind.

Addiction is telling your friends and family that it’s “just allergies”, even though you have sounded stuffed up all-year round.

Addiction is that look of disapproval and pity the volunteers at the drug clinic give you, as you throw your used needles into that yellow bio-hazard box, and reluctantly take a pack of 10 new clean ones.

Addiction is sitting in 7 day detox programs, writing out a 90 day recovery plan, and praying that you can actually stick to it. Praying.

Addiction is lies.
Addiction is feelings of shame.

Drugs were supposed to be fun.

They used to help you break down those social barriers, although ironically enough, now you couldn’t care less if you didn’t see another person ever again for the rest of your life.

On the inhale.
You feel your heart pump faster.
Your blood speeds through your system.
You feel feelings of euphoria you didnt know were possible.

On the exhale.
You realize thats another $50 dollars gone.
You remember that thing you had to do yesterday that you slept through.
You remember the cracking in your mothers voice when you picked up the phone and told her you weren’t coming home again.

You remember what you had. You remember what you lost.

Drugs can take you to other worlds, much different than our own.

But they will never take you to a world that mirrors what life was like before.

—  “Writing And Other Drugs” by Chris Manchester (writingandotherdrugs)

im here for alcoholics

im here for alcoholics who drink to ease anxiety

im here for alcoholics with bpd who started drinking on impulse and now they can’t stop

im here for alcoholics who are minors and don’t have their alcoholism taken seriously because they’re “too young”

im here for alcoholics who are students and have their alcoholism brushed off because “all students drink a lot”

im here for lgbt alcoholics who can’t access safe spaces because they tend to involve alcohol

im here for alcoholics who are victims of trauma and abuse

im here for alcoholics who drink because of any mental illness

im here for alcoholics with alcoholic parents, siblings, and other family members

im here for alcoholics in codependent relationships

because the whole existance of alcoholism can be filled with so much guilt and shame. because it can make you feel so alone

im here for alcoholics

not to get wildly specific but you know that feeling of euphoric vindication you get when you’re driving the correct speed and someone is riding your ass trying to intimidate you to go faster and you don’t do it because you don’t believe in living your life recklessly to appease other people so they get in the next lane over so they can speed up in front of you but karma grabs them by the throat and they get stuck behind someone going under the speed limit so they have to drive back behind you because you’re an adequate driver and you know what you’re doing and you can feel the guilt + shame permeating their vehicle as you just continue listening to your music of choice and safely heading towards your destination like lmao i would die for that feeling

Honestly I believe everyone should have friends who can take one good look at you and ask “what’s wrong?” even when you’re putting on a brave face

Friends who know what a cigarette at 1 am means for you 

Friends you’re not afraid to ask a hug from when needed

Friends who can sit with you in silence for two hours and just keep you company

Friends who you can cry in front of and not feel an ounce of shame

Ben

Based on this imagine found at @thefandomimagine

Kylo Ren x Reader

Warnings: A little bit of Force-play (geddit?). A bit saucy. Maybe NSFW.

Word count: 641



“You understand the amount of damage you have been causing lately is getting embarrassingly costly, don’t you?”

He strides into the room, his shoulders slumping further with every step he takes as he pulls his belt from around his waist, tossing it at the chair near the bed. He says nothing but you can feel his shame radiating through the room as it is wont to do as soon as you bring up finances and the effect his awful temper has on them.

Keep reading

I wanted to do this relationship template for Arian, but I also wanted to do the “Self-Knowledge” and “Bold/Italicize Those That Apply” tags for her (which a few people tagged me in!!), so I combined them into one post :D (read below for them all!)

In this template’s case, the colors closest to Arian are what her initial feelings eventually transitioned to over the course of Inquisition. So, for example, she distrusted Sera at first but became best friends with her in the end :)

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i mistook myself for desert. told my body to hush
when it begged for water. ignored the wailing jaws
that burst open on the soles of my feet every time
i walked across the concrete in the middle of july.
i know the battle hymn the inside of my thighs sing
better than anyone else. i look in the mirror
and see a gaunt brushfire. every day is not a day—
it is a feast. i live off both everything and nothing.
i see myself as both unstoppable and terrifyingly temporary.
such is the contradiction of desert girls with small hands
and growing bellies. here i am: choking on the dust
of myself, knowing everything that was once strong
is now alkali. o, how beautifully i sing lies to myself
at night. how clumsy my teeth are while trying to consume
the truth: that the desert will be beautiful no matter what,
but something must be done about the drought.
—  desert girl, Lydia Havens 

#ODINISARESPONSIBLEDOM2K17

Moonlight…


Quite possibly one of the only movies that ran the risk of having me be that “person” in the movies; you know the one that just claps or you can silently hear them cry, and yet feel no shame from these actions. Human, actions.

Moonlight (2016) is directed by Barry Jenkins telling a great story of a young African American male, Little, and his times growing up in Florida (later moving to GA to start a new life). “Little”/Chiron opens the movie within the first few moments after we meet Juan (played by Mahershala Ali) who introduces himself silently and you can tell by his actions approaching the block that he’s the “guy”. Juan and Little ultimately bond over him searching out to ensure Little’s safety as he sees him being chased by a gang of students attempting to attack him for unknown reasons at the time. The relationship between these two develops of the course of years and months until Juan just disappears, and dies.

We learn more about Little and the path that he takes throughout his next teen years. He receives a nickname “black” from a friend name Kevin, his mother is a terrible drug addict looking for any fix she can get (Juan initially was her drug pin without them ever knowing of each other) and Little is basically a grown adult child. He attempts to find love with a fellow classmate, who later betrays him and beats him down in a crowd of people; unbenounced to the “crush” Kevin, Little is deeply effected from this situation. He retaliates in the best way possible but attacks the classmate that initiated the fight and NOT Kevin (showing his soft spot for him). Little is eventually sent to GA for some “alone” time aka jail time, and completely starts over and takes the life that Juan once lived; and still maintains this twinkle in his eyes.

Little randomly receives a phone call from Kevin after several years of them not speaking and you can instantly see his demeanor change to the fragile him from years ago. The call from someone from your past reflecting on the fact that they just randomly thought about you sends a shockwave at least through most, and I completely understand this. I won’t give too many more details away but the conversation that ends the movie completely sent me over the edge! Little’s character is one that’s neglected and then has a stranger come in to show you that love doesn’t have to come directly from family and etc. While his mother loves him she constantly reminds him “you’re my only, I’m your only”, yet she doesn’t exhibit the characteristics of a true loving mother.

In some many ways this story is way more than anything that I EVER THOUGHT I WOULD SEE! It’s 2017 (we’re 8 days in) and I love the progress that I see in America, but I’m also excited for the next steps of progress to come. This movie, the songs, and the characters all sprung some type of “feeling” in me; whether anger, love, or sadness, a feeling was produced. I honestly cannot say how good of a movie this was without saying THIS IS A GOOD ASS MOVIE (pardon the “ass”, but it’s true). The performances from every actor shows to be something that everyone will relate to, they are so raw and down the core that they beg you to see they are truly in character. So, get your drink (I had 2 Bud Lights because my eyes were SHOT) and sit back and relax, you’ll love this classic movie!

if you are ableist and consider those who have mental illnesses to be “lesser” humans then you can, honest to god, unfollow me.

tired of feeling shamed for having a mental illness and also for talking about it.

Spicy Sorcerer gets Kinkshamed

Context: we were looking for information on an artifact for a mission we decided to skip out on completing because it was a bad idea, eventually we were told to meet with a group of what our cleric assumed to be “cultists” because they were wearing hooded robes. one of the party members, our sorcerer, is a former prostitute.

“Cultist”:alright, we’ll need you four to put these blindfolds on. we can’t let you find out how to get to the place we’re going.

Sorcerer: I’m used to this anyway

(the whole group burst out laughing)

Cleric OOC: I want to kinkshame the sorcerer

Cleric: (rolls a nat 20)

DM: (Sorcerer), you don’t see it, but you can feel someone shaming you.

(once we get to the place)

“Cultist”: Alright, you can take your blindfolds off now.

Sorcerer: Do I have to?

(the group elf (i think it was the elf) took off the sorcerer’s blindfold, which he took before descending the stairs very flustered and very embarrassed)

anonymous asked:

Do you have any advice for someone that's still in the closet but has very homophobic parents?

At the end of the day you have to look out for your own wellbeing and stop living for other people. This is something I am still learning but letting people control your life or make you feel shameful for something you can’t control isn’t a way to live.

2

If you’re taught to hide what makes you different, you can end up feeling a lot of shame about who you are.
And that’s not okay.
What’s wrong is the people out there who make us feel unsafe.