you can delete my commentary if you really want to but i worked hard on it

An.an 2016.3.30 No. 1997 Omiryu interview translation

Scans can be accessed here, thank you to @banira-san!

(Brackets) indicate notes that are originally in the interview, while {t/n: brackets} indicate my commentary, which I will keep to a minimum because no one wants to hear me screaming. How did I manage such a feat… the truth is, I went back afterwards to delete my brackets…

Comments and suggestions are very welcome -I have tried my best to translate this but I am by no means an expert, so please correct me if I get anything wrong.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I saw your long distance s/o headcanons for Yuri Plisetsky and was wondering if you could do the same for Viktor, please, thanks.

I’m so glad the long-distance headcanons are so popular! The headcanons for Yuri Plisetsky can be read here. Thank you for the requests! These are so fun, since I have a long distance friendship with one of my best friends :) ((p.s. if y’all want a long distance friend, I’m willing to be that friend!))

[Viktor Nikiforov]

  • Your relationship blossomed out of an innocent Instagram post on your end
  • The figure skating season was under way, and you being a huge fan of the sport, decided to make something for your favorite skater, Viktor Nikiforov of course you basic bitch jk ily
  • Before a competition in the Grand Prix, you post a photo of your pet in an outfit similar to the one Viktor wears in his skating program with a wish of good luck to him
  • You tag him in the photo, and expect nothing more than a few likes from his fans and some awws from the animal-lovers community
  • too bad you set your expectations a little too low and were not expecting the shit that was coming for you ho ho ho
  • Viktor happened to be scrolling through Instagram at saw the notification of being tagged in and mentioned in a post
  • Curious, he looks at your post, and his stomach fills with butterflies
  • Knowing that someone spent the time to create a smaller version of his outfit for a pet to wear was the sweetest thing ever to him, and he needed to know the genius behind this flawless artwork
  • He had no intentions other than to thank you for your wishes and to compliment you on your post
  • but both of you are going to be getting more than you bargained for haha winky face
  • Viktor sends you a DM with a cordial ‘thank you’ and tells you how much he appreciates the post you made
  • You don’t answer for some time, and that bothers Viktor somewhat. He doesn’t know why, but he can’t help but await for your reply
  • He finds himself wondering who you are, what you’re doing, how you’re feeling, etc.
  • pssst that is called love my friends
  • When you do reply, Viktor feels elated for no apparent reason
  • He initiates a conversation without even thinking about it, but that mindlessness becomes something much more beautiful
  • You talk about your pets for hours, Viktor gushing about Makkachin and you about your pet
  • That somehow turns into imagining the two of you adopting a pet and raising it together
  • It is then that Viktor realizes he’s made more than just a friend
  • Phone numbers are exchanged and your text conversations become more deep and personal than just your interest in animals
  • Viktor learns about your personality and you explore his, both of you beginning to fall in love with each other in conversation
  • You guys send each other lots of selfies on Snapchat, playing with the filters and posing with your pets
  • he screenshots all of them and puts them in a folder and looks at them all of the time but you didnt hear it from me
  • You’d think he’d get distracted from his career while he spends so much time on his phone to communicate with you, but the thoughts of you that evade his brain drive him to be better at practice and to achieve perfection in competition
  • You watch every performance on TV, sending him snaps of the performance with your running commentary for him to look at later and after he’s won probably tbh
  • The response to those snaps is usually a selfie of Viktor holding his medal and blowing you a kiss with a heart emoji too probably aw
  • He promises to come visit you as soon as he finds time or if he comes to your country, and he can’t wait to just give you a big, warm hug
  • One morning after a few months of talking to Viktor, you wake up to a text from him asking you to be more than just his ‘Internet Friend’
  • “You mean you want to be romantic Internet friends, Viktor?”
  • “Yes! Romantic Internet Friends that go on dates!”
  • You’re laughing in response to his text when a FaceTime call from Viktor flashes on your screen
  • You’re hesitant to answer, since you had just woken up, but you accept it anyway
  • Viktor’s beautiful face fills your screen, and you can see it in his eyes how he’s admiring you
  • “Hello, my beloved! You look so lovely in the morning!”
  • “Just imagine waking up and getting to see this every morning, Viktor.”
  • Viktor’s face flushes red at your comment, but he mostly feels lovestruck at the sound of your voice
  • You blush twice as hard as him, since you realize that the bold comment was the first thing he’s ever heard you say out loud
  • Your beautiful long-distance relationship with Viktor has come so far already, but there is so much more to come for you in the future~

[Yuri Katsuki]

  • The way he met you is actually very comical
  • Back when he was training in Detroit, there was a night where Phichit and Yuri were hanging out together
  • Phichit got on the topic of dating, and it all went downhill from here
  • “Yuri, why don’t you ever date? I mean no homo but you’re super cute and nice and anyone would be lucky to have you-“
  • “Phichit st OP you know i have a weird thing for Viktor rn jeez
  • Some arguing leads to Phichit signing Yuri up for a dating website
  • not naming names but this website is strongly based off of Tinder mkay
  • Phichit is scrolling through nearby profiles and keeps a running commentary about every face that shows up
  • Yuri is red-faced the whole time and really just wishing Phichit would leave him alone
  • But he glances at the phone screen at the perfect moment and sees your stunning face
  • Phichit is about to swipe left and Yuri grabs his arm so flipping fast
  • “Move dammit who the fuck is this creature Phichit how dare you almost swipe left fuck you man”
  • Yuri spends an hour or two cradling the phone in his hands, carefully reading every aspect of your profile over and over and slowly falling in love with you
  • He finds courage he didn’t know he had and swipes right
  • Before his confidence can falter, he forces himself to send you a message to say hello
  • He waits so anxiously for your reply that he can’t stand it
  • You answer immediately, and his heart hammers in his chest so hard it hurts
  • you comment about how cute he is in his profile picture and he nearly dies
  • Yuri cuts right to the chase and asks you to meet up immediately like right now you’re only a few miles away let s g o
  • His excitement was for naught, since you promptly inform him that you’re in a taxi on the way to the airport; you’re nearly late for your flight home and don’t have any time to meet him
  • You both express your disappointment, but continue to talk to each other about your interests and such. You exchange messages all night, neither of you getting any sleep
  • Your relationship with Yuri progresses quite quickly, exchanging phone numbers after only a week of talking on the dating website
  • needless to say he deletes the app right after that
  • Snapchats are sent daily, with selfies, the food you’re eating, what you’re up to, etc.
  • More than anything, you spend a lot of time texting, since talking on the phone gives Yuri some anxiety
  • Your first FaceTime session is the most adorably awkward thing to ever happen in the history of this planet let me tell you
  • Yuri calls you first. and you have to wait a moment to answer since you’re so nervous
  • But once you’re connected, it takes a moment for both of you to drink in each other’s virtual presence
  • Neither of you would talk at first, both too nervous to say anything
  • You break the silence with a small ‘hello,’ and his heart melts in his chest at the sound of your lovely voice
  • After that, he knows you’re the one he’s meant to spend his life with
  • This relationship lasts a long time; you talk for almost two years before you make it ‘official’
  • He never officially asks you to be his significant other; it kind of just happens by accident
  • You were watching one of his skating competitions on TV, and he was being interviewed by the reporters after he received his score
  • He was so flustered by his victory in his flawless performance, he can’t hold back that answer that comes to his mind when asked how he’s been so successful this season
  • “I dedicate my hard work to (Y/N), the most wonderful and perfect significant other I could ever ask for!”
  • yeah it killed you but tbh I’m pretty sure he was more surprised than you were
  • Your relationship has come a long way, and the next step is to meet in person and go on an official date~

PART 1! [PART 2] [PART 3]…alphabetical by author….

Dustfall by AmandaDBone

johnlock

AU omegaVerse - a strange maroon dust falls over London and soon everyone starts to exhibit strange changes. John and Sherlock go about their business but as time passes the changes in themselves draw them together with a few hiccups but ultimately leading to smut.

AU, omegaLock, alphaJohn, alphaMolly, omegaStrade, alphaMrsHudson, tentacles (alpha females have tentacles…not really my thing but its its minimal), dubcon (as is found im most omega fics), plot, smut, relationship plot, (its hell’a hot if you like omegaVerse)

Midnight Blue Serenity by BeautifulFiction

johnlock

Sherlock takes a case requiring him to dress the part, stubble, eyeliner, ear rings and tight jeans… John has never seen him like this and he is fascinated. Together they work the case, Sherlock as a bartender and John one of the bouncers.

fluff, smut, case fic, plot, relationship plot, (this fic has a little bit of everything and Sherlock being sexy on the dance floor with John to top it off)

A Quiet Murmuration by cathedral_carver

johnlock

Sherlock almost gets them killed and John wants an apology in return, asking for 1000 kisses.

fluff, relationship plot, (this is cuteness, CUTENESS! If your having a bad day this will give you the fluttery feel goods)

Correspondence by Cleo2010

johnlock

Sherlock & John correspond by letter as Sherlock works a case for Mycroft and absence makes the heart grow fonder as they fall in love.

fluff, angst, plot, relationship plot, (also cuteness and feel goods)

Curious Case by Cleo2010

johnlock

Sherlock has managed to burn his hands and can’t take care of his ‘needs’ for himself and therefore Sherlock is forced to ask John to assist him…

smut, fluff, relationship plot, (I’m not sure this requires any more commentary on my part cause its pretty clear where it leads to)

as you consume the longitudes by coloredink

johnlock

John has a terrible time dating Sara and it’s not because of Sherlock, in fact Sherlock is unbelievably sweet. Sherlock is still himself by deducing what went wrong on Johns date but its with the feel of season three that you know he loves John so much that he would do anything for him.

fluff, smut, perfect fluff, relationship plot, (oh my gosh Sherlock loves John so much in this fic is almost painful and its beyond perfect. It definitely gives you that flutter in your chest.)

The Internet Is Not Just For Porn by cyerus

johnlock

Sherlock has a boyfriend in Canada that he texts all the time and everyone at the Yard thinks that he is fake until one day he is not.

fluff, (and Super Cute!)

Gone Is My Past by cyerus

johnlock

AU dogJohn - John is a bomb detection dog turned human. He has a hard time coping with his new human body and emotions. Humans are so confusing and complicated but Sherlock understand.

fluff, angst, (I think it is important to say this is not johnlock in the sense of sexual relationship, it is johnlock in the companion friendship way only…because John is a dog) (and it is so very very good)

The Heart On Your Sleeve by flawedamythyst

johnlock

AU - Everyone has a tiny heart birthmark on their wrist and when they fall in love the heart gets darker and darker red. Sherlock keeps his covered with buttoned dress shirts and John strangely wears a watch all the time now.

AU, angst, fluff, plot, relationship plot (so very very cute)

On the Steadfast Approach of an Oncoming Darkness by joolabee

johnlock

AU end of the world - This fic is so So SO GOOD it makes you feel so many emotions. Sherlock and John travel together under the dying sun, to the sea, as the world ends.

angst, ANGST, A N G S T, (did I mention angst? well, add emotional pain and tears while your at it. I have never cried so hard reading a fan fic as i cried reading this one)

Upon Waking by joolabee

johnlock

This is an amazing story, John can only be awake while Sherlock is asleep and vice versa. They rely on the other eventually going to sleep so they can wake up to eat and live their lives. Ironically they become closer as they are pulled further apart.

fluff, angst, plot, relationship plot (this story/premise behind this one is very clever and intriguing)

A Slip of the Finger by Katzedecimal

johnlock

John accidentally types the wrong phone number into his phone one evening and ends up texting with a very bossy unknown man.

fluff, angst, (This is the complement fic to A Finger Slip by Pawtal which is currently down due to a mistake on AO3 where it was deleted. I would also recommend A Finger Slip but obviously can not link you to it until she re-posts it.)

Evening Ride by LapisLazuli

johnlock

PDA - John takes the tube to and from work… basically John is turned on by the tall dark and handsome man standing entirely too close to him.

smut, ‘relationship’ plot, (and a tiny horny plot)

Scrutiny by lifeonmars

johnlock

John doesn’t take to well to the realization that Sherlock knows exactly what he dose in the bathroom every morning and exactly when he takes too long. 

fluff, relationship plot, (I personally have a deduction kink and this fic delivers that and then some! you will not be disappointed if you share this kink)

Deflowered by Lorelei_Lee

johnlock

AU mobBossJohn - Sherlock is a rent boy and John is ‘The Doctor’ a mob boss who purchases Sherlock’s virginity.

smut, fluff, dubcon (the tags claim it is dubcon but Sherlock wants John from the start, its not dubcon) (This a fuck hell’a hot!)

Never Change a Running System by Lorelei_Lee

johnlock

Sherlock manages to get some cuts on hiss backside during a case and while John is helping apply plasters Sherlock gets an erection. Sherlock has a difficult time figuring out how to make it go away and after quite a few days John has had enough.

smut, fluff, relationship plot, (this is so freaking hot, John suspects Sherlock of having a sex addiction)

A Question of Intent by Mildredandbobbin

johnlock

AU omegaVerse - John comes home to Sherlock in heat and tries to resist and even goes so far as forcing Sherlock to take his contra-heat pills before getting the hell out of the room but Sherlock is too far gone and follows him.

AU, omegaLock, alphaJohn, smut, fluff, relationship plot, dubcon (this one actually is a bit dubcon but considering its Sherlock and John and their bromantic relationship its not really that big of surprise to either of them) (I really like this one because the writer switches it up a bit and omegaLock gets to top alphaJohn)(also this was the first omegaVerse I ever read)

Shatter the Darkness (Let the Light In) by MojoFlower

johnlock

AU genieLock - John runs across Mike who takes him to an antiques shop where he buys an old lamp. It is revealed to him that he has purchased a magic lamp with a genie. Sherlock can grant him one wish before he will be forced back into the lamp but the only thing John wants is to keep Sherlock.

AU, smut, fluff, angst, plot, relationship plot, (originally i didn’t think this would be a story I would like (not sounding like my kind of thing) but I quickly fell in love with the story) (very satisfying to read and has a good ending)

The Importance of Torn Papers by MyLittleCornerOfSherlock

johnlock

Sherlock over hears John talking with Harry as they discus little notes that their mother used to leave for them in their lunches and decides to start leaves little notes around the flat for John.

fluff, Fluff, did I mention FLUFF?, relationship plot, and fluff, (so disgustingly cute, you explode)

Just A Little by peevee

johnlock

Basically the description by peevee for this fic is perfect “In which John and Sherlock aren’t having sex, until suddenly they are.”

smut, fluff, (I love this one very much, I have a kink for just the tip penetration and this one is written perfectly)

A Good Coat and a Short Friend by professorfangirl (lizeckhart)

johnlock

Sherlock is usually very private with his affections however on this night something is different and John experiences the PDA version of his friend.

smutt, fluff, (it may be smut but it is really rather sweet)

Amenable by Resonant

johnlock

John decides to kiss Sherlock for the first time and it leads to a series of awkward encounters that are strangely satisfying for everyone involved. It is also a bit sexually frustrating but that is the entire point. It’s one off those fics that make you think to yourself “These two adorable idiots.”

fluff, smut, relationship plot (awkward super adorable fluff)

DNA by Resonant

johnlock

Sherlock comes back from the ‘dead’ and starts a ‘DNA donation’ business. In other words Sherlock is payed to sleep with women to get them pregnant in the cause of bettering the worlds gene pool.

smut, angst, plot, relationship plot (don’t be discouraged by the threesome, because the story is from John’s POV and is about how he deals and realizes what he really wants from Sherlock… if you know what I mean)

Once, twice by Rhuia

johnlock

BodySwap - Sherlock and John end up with their bodies swapped and while John is a bit mortified by this turn of events Sherlock takes every opportunity to experiment. As you can imagine Sherlock soon knows exactly how John likes to be touched and this leads to a bit of smut… a bit of Super Hot Smut!

smut, ‘relationship’ plot (fuck hot bodyswap smut)

Slow and Steady by SailorChibi

johnlock

virginLock - John doesn’t realize that Sherlock is a virgin and Sherlock is not sure he can handle having sex if it is going to be overwhelming like that every time. All Sherlock wants is to have the time to analyse and process the data.

smut, fluff, (very well written, virginLock is perfect, he is not ignorant he just wants to experience sex at his own pace)

War Paint by Spadesinspades

johnlock(-ish)

Sherlock creates the persona Sebastian Moran to infiltrated Jim Moriarty’s network, taking full control while John thinks Sherlock is dead and seeks revenge for his death by hunting down Jim’s second in command.

angst, plot, (John is so fucking bad ass in this, I can’t even begin to express the BAMF levels)

The Pretence of an Unacknowledged Truth by stickleworting

johnlock

AU omegaVerse - omegaLock takes alphaJohn to meet his family as his fake bond mate so they will stop harping on him to find a mate. Sherlock synthesizes a fake bond scent that leads to complications at his parents house.

AU, omegaLock, alphaJohn, fluff, smut, relationship plot, dubcon (the tags on the fic say dubcon but its not even that really) (this is a fucking hot smut fic) (this is actually a pretty good omega fic to read if you are just starting to read omega fics)

Transport by thisprettywren

johnlock

Mike works at a pleasure house(?) and sometimes John covers for him. Sherlock gets over stimulated from the work and to reset, he needs to get off and so he uses the services of that particular business.

smut, relationship plot, bdsm, (the bdsm is very psychological in this one and its beautifully written, It is used as a tool to calm Sherlock, its not about sex its about his mind.)

Give An Inch And They’ll Take A Mile by strangegibbonTSylvestris

johnstradelock

pure porn. no plot, however what makes me like this one so much is how John and Sherlock make it clear that they really want Greg with them because they like Greg for being Greg and not just as a third body in bed. They honestly want him to be a part of their relationship. 

smut, (and also sweet… but mostly smut) (this is actually part two of Triptych but I prefer this part)

What Meets the Eye by worldaccordingtofangirls

johnlock

AmnesiaLock - Sherlock loses his memory and instead of telling anyone he cant remember he decides that he will just deduce who everyone is. He makes a minor error when deducing that John is his husband.

fluff, plot, relationship plot, (very adorable fluff)

The Great Sex Olympics of 221B by XistentialAngst

johnlock

John thinks Sherlock should take his advice about sex over Sherlock because he has had more but Sherlock is basically Sherlock and has to conduct an experiment to see who really is more knowledgeable.

smut, fluff, relationship plot, (When I first heard about this fic it was not described to me very well and I was really concerned cause John and Sherlock are planning on sleeping with strangers to see who is better but its fffucking hot, *fans self*)

~♥

Colorful Critiques: This Isn't Fate Feedback

Title: This isn’t Fate(Working title)

Word Count: 3244
Summary: Melinda is a were-tiger on her way to her first class of the semester where she is introduced to her Elemental Theory Classmates. (this is just the first chapter of my book)
Specific Concerns: Introduction of the MC and other characters from her perspective
Triggers: A little Racism (What about phobias? I have lizard people and snake people and also a Spider-lady)
Rating: G
Race/Ethnic group: My MC is black and there are a few side characters in this chapter who are also poc. Tobi is Desi, or at least that’s how I pictured them, Leonard is black, and the teacher is also Desi. A lot of characters are also not human enough for skin color.

Feedback: 

For this particular piece (and many more to come), I am analyzing specific issues and concerns as it relates to Black characters and their descriptions. I’ve chosen specific paragraphs where I found issues that relate to the submitter’s original concerns. The issues are bolded and my commentary is found in bullet points after the bold and italicized headings. 

Melinda stared moodily at her reflection squinting her eyes and turning this way and that to stare at her nose. The broken appendage said nothing, you know how noses are. “Why didn’t I duck,” she muttered at it and prodded it with a finger. Pain lanced through her face and she sighed and gave up on the whole endeavor. She patted her cloudlike halo of auburn curls into a more manageable position and pulled on a cream colored sweater that one of her packbrothers had knitted for her and shuffled around in the laundry basket for her pair of breeches that still held the warming spell from the previous day.

Describing Black Hair

  • This isn’t exactly a bad description of Black hair, but it still isn’t really clear that she’s Black here. You might want to start with her skin tone before going to her hair so that the reader can get a better picture. Also “manageable” doesn’t really fit as a description because it doesn’t qualify anything. Manageable compared to what? It’s not a detailed description because anyone can have unmanageable hair, you don’t need to be Black nor does Black hair always have to be described as being unmanageable.
  • If the character states that she thinks her hair is unmanageable, that’s a different story. When it comes up in a narrative, the authorial voice should be more objective in description, especially in third person POV. You can describe her hairstyle and leave it at that. “She patted her cloud-like halo of auburn curls into a ponytail.” It does a little subtle characterization this way and does start to give me a little more description about the character.   

“Hah!” with a triumphant grin she pulled them out of the box and pulled them on the yellow fabric warming as it came into contact with her dusty brown skin. After another quick look in the mirror, where she glared at her nose again, she grabbed her rucksack and headed from her dorm room. At the doorway she paused and grabbed a knitted hat from the keyhook next to the door and slipped it on, yanking it down past her ears. Wispy curls of hair peeked out from the brim of the hat and tickled her face but at least she wouldn’t freeze to death now. One deep, preparatory breath later, she stepped outside and locked the door behind her.

Description of Skin Color

  • This paragraph is a little better at describing the character. The skin tone and hair type is described without invoking a negative connotation the way the word “manageable” does in the first paragraph. I wouldn’t recommend using the word dusty, not because it’s a bad description, but variations of it are used during the course of the excerpt. After a while, it’s hard to really picture the complexion of Melinda’s skin, so perhaps something more qualifying. Here’s the skin tone guide for reference.  

Pacing

  • On a general note, this part of the story spends a lot of time focused on Melinda getting ready. I’m not sure if this is the first chapter, but the first two paragraphs can easily be summed up as: “Melinda stared at her reflection in the mirror, poking and prodding her nose. ‘Why didn’t I duck?’ she thought to herself, drawing her fingers against the curve of her nose. She sighed and hoped for the large bump to go away as she pulled her wispy auburn curls into a ponytail. She pulled on a cream colored sweater knitted by one of her packmates and a pair of warming breeches that contrasted with her golden brown skin.”
  • This is just something general that I noticed during the excerpt. There were a lot of parts that can be condensed and summarized into just a few sentences or paragraphs. I mention it here because the way it’s paced makes some of the things that you are trying to do a little difficult.

The pebble scaled lizardfolk next to him giggled and stood. “To get it out of the way, yes, I am sexless and yes I prefer zie and zir.” Zie was thick bodied with an equally thick and less flexible tail than zir companion. Melinda thought zie looked like zie came from one of the desert people, all muted green and dust colored. “My name is Zeke,” Zie quirked a smile, “I know, my parents weren’t terribly original. I’m a dual healing and shaperate major and I thought for the longest time growing up that I was male even though my body wasn’t like my friends’. It wasn’t until they started to go through puberty that I realized I didn’t have what they had. I knew there was something wrong when I referred to myself as male, and I’m very happy with my body.” Zie smirked again, “But sometimes I’ll slip back into former habits.” Zie settled zirself back on the cushion next to Jordan, who looked as if he might spontaneously combust from embarrassment when zie nuzzled his shoulder with zir blunt muzzle.

Pacing Issues and Pronouns

  • I love love love the use of the pronouns and I would suggest to keep using them. I was getting tripped up on them, but I couldn’t figure out why when I read this through the first time. Now that I’m going back through the story, I think the use of the pronouns ties into the pacing issues and sentence condensing mentioned before.  For example this sentence “Melinda thought zie looked like zie came from one of the desert people, all muted green and dust colored” could easily be changed to “Zie was muted green and dust colored like the desert people” or any variation of the sort. I would say keep using the pronouns, but use them as you would with other pronouns. For example, you wouldn’t say “He settled himself back on the cushion”, you would just say “He settled back on the cushion”. In this case “Zie settled back on the cushion” flows smoother. This issue comes up again, so just keep this in mind.  

The other Naga, a male with skin darker than Melinda’s and whom had rough, sandy colored scales and a muffled rattle at the end of his tail spoke up, “My name is Leonard. I’m male, and I’m a healing major.” He shrugged. “There’s not really anything interesting to know about me. I guess… I had spurts of spontaneous healing even before I reached puberty.”

Description of Skin Tone and Weaving Description into Action

  • Again, the description isn’t really clear. The comparison only works if we have a clear idea of what Melinda’s skin looks like. Melinda’s description gets a little lost in the morning routine. This is an easy fix. Either make Melinda’s description of her skin tone a little more prominent. You don’t have to mention it every time the reader sees Melinda, but there are actions she can do that can be woven into the narrative. For example, after Melinda challenges Reginald and he fires back, she can blush in embarrassment or get flushed with anger. You could say “Melinda blushed red against her warm brown skin”. If you are going to use a comparison, just make it clear what it’s being compared too. Since Melinda’s description hasn’t been mentioned since the beginning, it might be beneficial to mention it here. Or you can just describe Leonard’s skin tone separately from Melinda’s too. 

“Alright. How’s this? I help you pass this class and you tell me more about your pack life since none of the libraries here have any information about your culture?”

General: World building

  • I’m curious as to why Misha wants to know this. How does Melinda feel about this? I know she agrees to it, but is this an appropriate question that people can ask in this particular world? Not that this question is implying this, but from what I can gather about the world (and maybe Melinda’s nonchalant attitude about the question is a tell), it’s almost like asking someone “Can you tell me about being Black because there are no books on the culture?” Again, not to say that this question implies that is being asked, but some of the world building nuances can be brought in at this point. Can people ask this question? What does Melinda think about it? Why does Misha feel confident enough to ask?  

Overall: 

  • Seems like it’s going to be a good story. I’m curious to read more. 
  • Good world building.
  • Be careful with pacing and passive voice. 

[[Full Excerpt Under the Cut]]

  • If you are adding commentary, constructive criticism only. (you will be deleted and blocked from this site if you have posted flames and/or hateful comments). 
  • If you are being critiqued, do not take anything personally. Take this experience as a lesson learned and grow as a writer.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

If the Doctor loved Rose more than he loved River, why did he abandon Rose to have a life with his double? Why not be with her - the one he loved more than anything? There was no reason for her to have to live in that parallel universe. He WANTED to let her go. So they both could move on and heal. He did love her sure, but he knew that River would be there for him in the future, that she'd know his name and it gave him hope that he'd love again. And more ardently than ever before.

Oh Nonny…

First things first: check your canon, and stop trying to make the Doctor think like a human. He didn’t ~abandon~ her and there was a HUGE reason to leave her there. He let her live “the one adventure he could never have” per Doomsday with a version of himself that could grow old with her and give her a real life. It wasn’t about moving on and healing - it was both so 1) he wouldn’t have to watch her “wither and die” and 2) so she would be able to have the life she wanted to live with him. TimeLord!him could never be a partner for her in the way that she would want him to be (as per her reaction when she learns TenToo will grow old at the same time she does)—so he gave her the gift of Human!him who could—and who clearly wanted to. This isn’t just subtext—it’s in DW Confidential with Tennant and Gardner, the MP3 commentary with Gardner and Collinson, and let’s not forget the DVD commentary with RTD where he pretty much comes out and says just that.

Second things second. River isn’t exactly ‘there’ for him. She jumps around in his timeline and they snark at each other for foreplay. By the tone of your ask, I can tell that you ship them but … you have to work really hard to accomplish that, it’s no easy feat, and you have to overcome the timey-winey brainwashing my-life-is-all-about-you squick which even RTD nixed as a plot point for Doctor/Rose precisely because he thought it would be too squicky (google the abandoned s1 script he was all LOL NO to). The first time canonically he sees her after she dies for him, what does he do? Snarks at her. The creator of the ship doesn’t even back it the canonicity per The Brilliant Book—and both Kingston and Moffat call the robot “marriage” questionable at best. The only thing ardent about their relationship is how hard poor Matt Smith and Alex Kingston had to work to give that couple any illusion of chemistry—it’s not about “love” in the narrative, it’s always comments about lust/handcuffs/screaming, pure and simple. We’re never shown “love”—in fact, we’re frequently shown the opposite. For example, love is NOT letting the person you supposedly care for rot in prison so you can go delete yourself from history, only to rebroadcast yourself the very next season lol. Kingston and Smith were troopers at trying to force a square peg into a round hole, but sex jokes =/= love, and that’s something I’ve never quite understood about the shipping of this pairing. The extent of his sadness over her death is about 10 seconds long and is relegated to a DVD extra of all things. And it’s a DVD extra bc Moffat went on the record on Twitter saying he didn’t think it was important/interesting enough for most fans to care—meaning that unlike Rose, River had NOTHING to do with Eleven’s arc. He never mentioned to Clara that she was a woman—and Moffat was happily giving interviews shipping Eleven and Clara even while River was still in the picture!!! Eleven’s dying thoughts were even of another woman! If my significant other ever loved ME that ‘ardently’ and was ‘there for me’ to that extent I’d divorce his sorry ass in a heartbeat.

I’m sure there are more people with better and more coherent answers to this bc it’s 2:30am and even thinking about such poorly written scripts is exhausting, so feel free to chime in.

On The Loop and Other Things

Hey gang. Lieberman here.

I’d like to address a number of things here. Criticisms that I’ve seen, concerns that people have about the channel, about me, and about the Sourcefed fan community. I wish that more of these things were obvious, and that posts like these were unnecessary, but that does not seem to be the case. Let’s clear the air really quickly.

1. Let’s talk about The Loop. When I started it the first time around, my intention was to make a purely informational news show that let me discuss the political, scientific, health, and food topics that, at the time, Sourcefed was not covering. It gave me a space to let people know about the stories I thought were important, or fascinating. I was really proud of the show, which shot on Friday mornings at 11:30am, and was edited in about 5 hours. Ultimately, it got cancelled when I was asked to help start Nuclear Family.

When I was asked to bring the show back, I was asked to put my point of view into the show, which I was at first resistant to. I know that the reason that people enjoyed the show the first time around was BECAUSE it was informational, not opinion-driven. That was the point of the show in the first place. And I understand why the new iteration is upsetting to people. It’s undeniably different.

However, as Sourcefed’s main videos are now free to address a wider array of serious topics, a purely informational show about serious topics isn’t quite as necessary as it was when every one of our videos was about giant spiders, twitter beefs, or Taylor Swift.

I’m trying to figure out, week by week, how to make a show that is informative and entertaining to you, the audience, and to me, the creator. I get about three hours a week to research and write this show. That’s it. I get to read it to Joel once before we shoot it. There are no researchers. There is no one else writing the jokes. It’s just me, at 6:30am, fighting off sleep as I try to understand, interpret, and comment on complex global issues.

I’m going to get things wrong. I may say “year” instead of “week”. It’s bound to happen. I apologize.

However, I won’t apologize for having an opinion. I won’t apologize for sharing it. I won’t apologize for the jokes, which, in general, are getting better. I am proud of the show.

It’s not a news show. It’s a commentary show. And if you don’t want my commentary, don’t watch it. You don’t have to. It’s a free video, posted in a free country. I won’t please everyone.

That’s not to say that if you disagree with me on the issues, or on how I perceive a situation, that we are at odds or that you shouldn’t watch the show. I encourage a healthy debate on every issue that we discuss.

However, if your root problem with the program is that I am the host and voice of it, you can improve your life immeasurably by not watching it. I’m not going anywhere. Period.

2. The Hillary video. Yes, the formal follow-up is still coming. I submitted the latest version of it before we went to VidCon, and we’re still figuring out what we can and can’t post. We are in communication with Google’s search team, and while we have some answers from them, those answers don’t necessarily offer more than you already know. We still have questions that they cannot answer due to proprietary information, and I’m not sure if telling you about that will have repercussions for me. TL,DR: It’s coming. Patience is a virtue. Thank you for waiting.

3. Yes, I’ve gained thirty pounds in the past year. Get over it. If you really need to waste your precious life governing my body or my choices, delete your account. You should be ashamed of yourself.

4. Don’t hate Joel. The man works incredibly hard to make these channels better, and to ensure Sourcefed’s future. He’s also the most open, transparent, and decent programming director / channel manager that our company has ever had. Cut him some slack. Again, growing pains.

The whole “exciting changes” thing? I’ll freely admit that was us trying to put a positive spin on what was a difficult and confusing time at our company. Joel is actively crafting a bright future for these channels, one that we can all be proud of. That takes time and a lot of work from all of us.

We’re hiring on new talent. We’re reconfiguring our schedule. I hate to ask you for your patience yet again, but that’s what we need from you. We want you to be proud to be Sourcefed fans for many years to come.

5. Comment Commentary got cancelled because viewership had dropped sharply, and because it basically shut down our office in order to get it shot and edited in time to post. Every editor in the building had to work on it at once to get it up in time. That’s just not sustainable without views to back up that intense workload. I’m really sorry that this was never communicated to you properly at the time.

Many of us here, myself included, thought that clear communication was the best course of action on the topic. We were shouted down. It happens. Again, I’m sorry about how it was handled. That wasn’t cool. Not one bit.

That’s all that I want to talk about right now. I hope that even if we don’t agree (and some of us won’t) you can respect my views on these topics. Thanks. Lieberman.

“Behold! I have created a thing!”

Us cosplayers, especially in this age of social media, are kind of almost forced to put ourselves and our work out there for everyone to see. No one’s actually forcing us to do it, but peer pressure is not just something teachers and other adult humans tell you about to stop you from doing stupid stuff.

We share things online with our followers, because on some level, we want someone to tell us that we’re actually achieving something. 

If we truly only made stuff for ourselves, we would be more than happy to just look at ourselves in the mirror and snap a selfie. But instead we share our stuff with complete strangers - or “followers” as we often refer to them, like we’re some bizarre cult leaders, standing in the middle of a crowd, holding up a photograph of a half-finished costume and yelling “Behold! I have created a thing!”

And so we put ourselves out there, we share pictures of our faces and our costumes, or pictures we’ve taken, or videos we’ve filmed. We do this for a multitude of reasons, and whether it is because we’re really proud of what we do or because we’re seeking validation, or maybe even looking for constructive criticism, one or more of the following things is bound to happen:

No one says anything.

We’ve all been there. You post something you’ve made, or thought about, or seen, and you get a grand total of one like from that one strange person on the other side of the world who never comments but always likes everything you post. And that’s it. You feel like the metaphorical tree, falling all alone in a forest with no one to see or hear. Do you really exist? 

There’s not actually much to say about this, ironically. Your work just didn’t really impress anyone, or Facebook really is being weird again with the whole reach thing, or you posted at a time when no person on the planet is online. It’s not a big deal, either way, because you like what you made, right? You wouldn’t have posted it if you didn’t, right? It’s not like you’re only posting stuff to see those magical numbers go up and the “Person X liked your page” notifications to pop up, right? RIGHT? 

… Either way, it’s not the end of the world. Trust me.

Someone says something negative. 

You worked so hard to make something and a person on the internet doesn’t think it looks good. Or thinks your face looks squished in. Or that you’re an attention whore. And it hurts. You worked hard on this stuff. You wanted to share your work and someone decides to throw poo in your face. How is that fair? Didn’t they teach manners in whatever school this person went to?

Now, I’m not saying this doesn’t suck. I’m just saying that it doesn’t necessarily suck as much as you think it does. If multiple people constantly bombard you with completely uncalled-for negative comments, that’s called bullying and harassment and that truly is a vile, evil thing of them to do, and I don’t think anyone could really just shake it off (and now I have Taylor Swift playing in my head; thanks, brain).

There is, however, the occasional disconnect on what is a negative comment and what is actual constructive criticism. And I do realise that saying this makes me sound like a seagull of the worst kind (I mostly lurk, fyi), but bear with me.

See, someone saying you’re ugly and that your costume sucks? That’s a negative comment. The best way to reply to it is probably not to do it at all. Just ignore it. Really. If you don’t want to look at it, delete it. The comment brings nothing constructive to your life and it’s your page/blog/whatever, so do what you like.

Someone saying they don’t agree on a choice you’ve made while making a costume or telling you your face doesn’t work, is sort of on the line between “douchebag” and “has a point but lacks social grace”. Because they’re at least making an effort at being specific about what they don’t like, but they’re not exactly offering any tips on how to improve on it. They are, however, sort of starting a conversation, which offers you the perfect opportunity to ask them to elaborate. Which in turn means they’ll either actually provide you with their insight on how to improve your work, or they’ll just bugger off because oh sweet lord, someone noticed their grumbling.

Someone saying they don’t agree with a choice you’ve made and offering alternative options for doing what you’re doing is, actually, if only vaguely, constructive. Someone telling you you face looks squished in but that you could be able to work around that by getting better at the whole make up thing is a rather blunt way of giving feedback, but it’s feedback nonetheless.

It’s your choice what to do with this vaguely and barely constructive commentary, really. If you’re not into it, it’s perfectly reasonable. If you, like me, were trained by the forces of blunt criticism (I have a degree in journalism, our feedback sessions were brutal), you may choose to take whatever bits of information you find hidden under all the salt in these comments and use them however you like.

Someone says something positive. 

This is the goldmine. The treasure at the end of the rainbow. The basket of kitties and a litter of puppies. A group of fluffy little ducklings all happily waddling about, and doing that adorable little tail wag thing that makes your heart melt (seriously, it’s the cutest thing ever ok). You post something and someone tells you it looks great! You look great! You did good! Good job you! You did stuff! You’re great! Or at least kinda nice! Go you!

Positive comments are nice, I’m sure we can all agree on that. However, I do think that in a weird way, the same rules about a comment being constructive apply to both positive and negative comments. It’s nice to hear someone thinks your work is nice, but there’s not really all that much you can do with the information other than feel pleased for about five seconds. 

Obviously we prefer hearing nice things to hearing mean things, that’s only human, but the information value in “you’re so pretty” and “you’re so ugly” is equally low. But we’re still only tempted to delete one of these comments, and even if we do, it’ll probably haunt us for days to come, when the other one is forgotten pretty much immediately. 

Should you really care, either way?

What you do with the commentary revolving around your work is entirely up to you. Your reactions do say quite a lot about you, though I’m not arrogant enough to make assumptions on what, exactly. If you truly are looking to improve your craft and aren’t just out there to seek approval (which is totally fine, by the way, as long as you don’t claim otherwise), you should definitely learn to listen. 

Because, like one of my journalism teachers liked to say, “Others may be right as well.”

- Elina