you be careful out there in the real world

Deep Ass Starters.
  • Sometimes it's hard to get in depth with your muse and their backstory, because you can't figure out how to bring those things up with others. Here are a couple of starters intended to make things a little more personal!
  • "What's holding you back?"
  • "I'm not comfortable with this conversation."
  • "Will you /ever/ be comfortable with this conversation?"
  • "Let me in sometime!"
  • "It's not that easy, you know."
  • "Help me understand."
  • "It's hard to connect with someone when all they do is push you away."
  • "Why are you always so cold?"
  • "Why are you always so happy?"
  • "Are you really happy now?"
  • "Who hurt you this badly to make you this way?!"
  • "What, did your ex mess you up that badly?!"
  • "Why do you keep fighting it any time you feel?"
  • "It's a problem, I get it."
  • "This is all kinds of messed up."
  • "That's not exactly a good coping method."
  • "So what happened, with your parents, really?"
  • "What was your childhood like?"
  • "Everyone has at lest a little bit of mommy/daddy issues. It's nothing to be ashamed of."
  • "My parents aren't exactly perfect models, either."
  • "You were bullied? What for?"
  • "Was it hard? Coming out, I mean."
  • "You can't just run away all the time."
  • "You can't just hide all the time."
  • "Are you still thinking about them?"
  • "I'm not the enemy here. But this makes me wonder who the real one is for you."
  • "Is the reason you're so cold and defensive because you feel threatened?"
  • "How long has it been since you last spoke to them?"
  • "You never talk about it, why?"
  • "How come you're so different around them?"
  • "It's like you don't have a care or worry in the world."
  • "You seem so perfect. I don't get it."
  • "What was your ex like?"
  • "I don't think I was ever good enough for them."
  • "Are you not comfortable being intimate?"
  • "Why don't you feel comfortable being intimate?"
  • "Letting someone see you that vulnerable, it's a scary thing."
  • "Are you scared of being hurt?"
  • "Have you ever been taken advantage of?"
  • "Why are you afraid of saying I love you?"
  • "I never understood how someone could say those words so easily."
  • "You're hurting others the way you've been hurt in the past, don't you think that's ironic?"
  • "You use people to make yourself feel better."
  • "I'm scared of being used again..."
  • "Losing someone isn't easy, but you're making it harder than it needs to be."
  • "How long has it been since you lost them?"
  • "You're too attached."
  • "I'm not attached, I'm just comfortable with what I'm familiar to."
  • "Maybe the real reason you're so controlling is because, deep down you'd rather have them in your grasp than lose them."
  • "Why did you ever break up?" / "Why did we ever break up?"
opposite/sister signs

Aries & Libra- war vs peace.. aries expresses the self forcefully, reckless and spontaneous. libra forms bonds, soothing and patient

Taurus & Scorpio- beauty vs darkness.. taurus lives for the beauty of life, scorpio is contantly reminded of what death feels like

Gemini & Sagittarius- trivia vs wisdom.. gemini gathers up as much (random) info as possible, sagittarius focuses on understanding it

Cancer & Capricorn- care vs duty.. cancer loves you and nurtures you, capricorn feels responsible for your well-being

Leo & Aquarius- love vs connection.. leo wants to love you, touch you, warm you up, aquarius seeks to connect and engage with your mind

Virgo & Pisces- reality vs fantasy.. virgo sorts out the mess of the real world, pisces daydreams away the chaos

-crystal melbourne | within the zodiac

youtu.be
Mischief Managed | Harry Potter Fan Film
Before the Order. Before the prophecy. Before Harry. Remember to watch in HD! Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs are proud to present (and star in)... MISCH...

A new Marauders fan film has just come out, and let me tell you IT’S AMAZING!!!
I’ve never seen anything that feels so authentic and REAL, and the amount of effort and care put into this astounds me! This is such a lovely piece of fan work, spread the word and support everyone who made a Harry Potter film we’ve always wanted! ❤

A Stash of Tiny Study Tips

STAYING MOTIVATED

  • Create realistic goals: get ___ grade on next ____
  • Manageable let down; get back on track
  • Keep track of grades: focused, know where stand, no surprises
  • Start small
    • Low risk confidence builders
  • Take time to relax/give self rewards
    • Days off, breaks, rewards
    • All work & no play =/= living
  • Little organization goes a long way
  • Reward achievements!
  • Keep balance with exercise, clubs, friends
    • 2h/d: friends and exercise
  • Remember that hard work pays off
    • Isn’t a breeze to try to get a 4.0 GPA; but it’s possible
    • You’re smart enough and can achieve it
    • 90% there with these tips, 10% is just pure hard work
  • Only chill on weekends
    • Monday-Friday: school mode
    • Have time for some fun
    • If work as hard as should during week, will need weekends to blow off steam
  • Be self-motivated
    • Grades can matter, not everything, but follow through on what needs to be done
    • Not most important part of college but underperform? You will regret it
    • GPA cutoffs exist and matter to employers
    • College is full of distractions and opportunities
    • Nobody will hold hand and the work will suck but all the prouder of yourself to be
      • Suck it up, buckle down, get it done
        • If think need break, probably don’t
  • Turn off the little voice
    • Realize not alone in questioning ability
    • Avoid people who tend to burst bubbles no matter what 
  • Physical triggers to stop
    • Incentive to get something done when know have something else during the day
    • Don’t have a gaping abyss of study time
  • Work has to get done, in the end
    • Books, examiners, and especially your future self isn’t going to care about your excuses for not doing the work
    • Take the first step
      • It will almost be fictional how hard you thought the task was going to be
      • Just keep going because you simply can’t afford NOT to do anything today, nonzero days
      • Leeway, don’t give your perfectionism control over your life

MUNDANE HABITS

  • Sleep! Think and function, mind & body
    • CAN sleep if keep up with coursework instead of procrastinating
    • Will miss out on some fun stuff
    • Need to stay awake in class
    • Figure out what need for full speed
    • Stay relaxed
  • Stay physically healthy
    • Diet and exercise
    • 1 hour exercise during week
    • Weekends off
  • Traditional breakfast not necessary if value extra sleep
  • Systematic habits: neat, prepared
  • Master material
    • Look for real world applications
    • Learning is a process: be patient, don’t expect to master off the bat
  • Designate study area and study times
  • Do trial runs
    • Practice tests
    • Ask a TA to listen to your oral performance
    • Study groups
  • Don’t copy other people’s psets and solutions

BEFORE SEMESTER

  • Spiral bound notebook, can color code with folders/etc if need be
    • Lecture notes: front to back
    • Reading notes: back to front (if fall behind on)
    • Seminar notes: mixed in with lecture notes, different pen color/labeled
    • Outline format
      • Bullet points for everything
    • Same NB for one set of class notes, separate notebooks for all classes
  • 5-subject notebook
    • Midterm and exam material in it
    • Mesh sources, study guide
    • All study material from week/month in one place
  • Pick the right major
    • Indulge in favorite hobby feeling
  • Pick professors & classes wisely
    • Take a small class
    • Pick classes that interest you so studying doesn’t feel torturous
      • Want to learn

GRADES SPECIFIC

  • Prioritize class by how can affect GPA
    • More credits: more weight
  • Work enough to get an A in your easy classes: take something good at
    • Don’t settle, don’t slack off, don’t put in minimal effort to get that B/C. Just put in a tiny bit more effort to ensure A
    • Will have harder classes and need to counteract
  • Take electives can ace
    • Anything but an A in an elective is kinda mean and an unnecessary hit for your GPA

FIRST DAY/WEEK/HALF OF CLASSES

  • Get to know teaching style: focus most on, lecture/notes
  • Pick and follow a specific note taking format
    • Outline
    • Date each entry
    • Capture everything on board
  • Decide productivity system
    • Google Cal
    • Todoist
    • Agenda: remind meetings, class schedule, important dates/midterms/quizzes/tests, no homework 
      • Always wanted to be prepared
      • Rarely last minute
      • Have plan, stay focused
    • Homework notebook
      • Good redundancy
  • Study syllabus
    • Know it thoroughly
    • Plot all due dates after class
    • Penalize if fail to abide by
  • Study the hardest for the first exam
    • Seems counterintuitive
    • Hardest/most important test
    • Pay attention to content and formatLess pressure: just need ___ on final to keep my A 
    • Easy to start high and keep high
  • Go into crunch mode at the beginning
    • End softly
    • Get plenty of sleep, exercise, and good food in the finals days before the exam

DURING SEMESTER: PEOPLE

  • Get to know professors: go to office hours, care about grades/course/them
    • Easier ask for help, rec letter
    • Get to know interests and what they think is important
    • Figure out their research interests, 60% of their job is research
    • Learning is dynamic
    • Discussion helps
  • Get feedback early when not sure what doing
    • Take comments constructively
  • Consistent class participation: ask questions, give answers, comment when appropriate
    • Understand material
  • Find a study buddy in each class: don’t have to study with
    • Somebody can compare notes with, safety net
    • Pick somebody who attends, participates, and take notes regularly
    • Make some friends
  • Participate as fully as can in group activities
    • Be involved
    • Learn – not be taught
  • Be punctual
    • Good impression, on human professors
    • DON’T BE LATE
  • Skipping class =/= option: It’s “cool” to get attendance award
    • Make all the classes: it’s hard to feel confident when missing key pieces
    • Get full scope of class, everything will make a lot more sense and save a lot of time in long run
    • Mandatory class: higher graduating cumulative GPA
    • Go to class when no one else does/want to show up, reward
    • Get to know professor, what’s on test, notice, r/s build, material not in reading
    • Unless optional and super confusing professor
  • Sit in one of the first rows
    • Don’t fall asleep
    • Fake interest if you have to
  • Tutors

DURING SEMESTER: THINGS TO DO

  • Take notes! Provided is bare minimum, accessed by students who aren’t attending lecture
    • Based on lecture and what read –> test; it’ll be worth it
    • Write it down
    • By hand
    • Bored? Doodle instead of going online
  • Read all assigned–even if need to skim
    • Seems cumbersome and maybe impossible
    • Figure out what’s important
    • Look at the logical progression of the argument/what’s important/what trying to prove
    • Understand everything that you do read–even if don’t read everything
    • PIck 2 examples from text per topic
  • Complete course material on time
    • DO NOT WAIT UNTIL DAY BEFORE IT IS DUE
    • Begin as soon as possible
      • Sometimes it’s just straight up impossible
    • Have it look attractive
  • Library doesn’t just mean = study
    • Social media in the library is still social media
  • Confusion is terrible
    • Read other textbooks, review course material @ another uni/by another professor, google the shit out of it
  • Review
    • Do not wait, do throughout semester
  • Exam prep
    • Ask for model papers, look at style & structure, thesis, how cite
    • Get old tests
      • Look at type of questions (detail level and structure)
      • Can solve old exams cold
      • If give out paper exams in class: probs won’t repeat questions, focus more on concepts but still learn the questions
    • Have class notes and psets down cold
      • Do all the practice problems
      • Read through notes a few times; rewrite into a revision notebook
        • Highlight major topics and subtopics
        • Different highlighter for vocab terms
        • Overall picture, go from concept to detail
          • Look at overall context and how specific idea fit into whole course
          • Ideas, don’t memorize all your notes
    • Better understand = more able to use and manipulate info and remember it. Understand = manipulation.
      • Charts, diagrams, graphs
      • Lists
      • Practice drawing labeled structures
      • Flash cards for memorization
        • Every school requires some degree of grunt memorization
        • Say it aloud, write it down
        • Get friends to quiz you
      • Self-test: severely challenge self, have a running collection of exam questions
      • Explain difficult concepts to your friends; force yourself to articulate the concept
    • Never pull an all-nighter
      • Do not spend every hour studying up to the exam
      • Eat, shower, sleep
    • Don’t wait until night before exam to study
      • Prep takes time even if reviewed throughout semester
    • Ask about format–don’t ask the professor to change it for you
    • Law of College: it will be on the exam if you don’t understand it
      • Ask professor, internet, textbooks
  • Night before exam
    • Jot what want to remember/have fresh
    • Read through in morning/before exam
    • Physical prep
      • Sleep, have test materials
  • Day of exam
    • Don’t cram every single spare minute
    • Go to bathroom before exam
    • Never miss an exam/lie to get more time
      • You won’t be any more ready 2-3 days after when supposed to have taken it
  • Slay exam. Get A. 

WEEKLY 

  • Friday morning: go through each syllabus, write down in HW notebook
  • All hw during weekend; study/reading assignments during week
  • Save everything
  • Divide big tasks into small pieces to help propel self
  • Standard study schedule: block off lectures, labs, regular commitments
    • Note the weeks that have assignments and tests that will require extra studying
    • Don’t oscillate too heavily every day with study times (i.e. don’t study 2-3 hours for weeks and then 10-12 hour days right before an exam)
    • Eat and sleep to make more extended work periods liveable and enjoyable

DAILY

  • Set an amount of time would like to study every day
    • Try to study most days
    • Avoid vague/zoned out studying –> waste of time
    • Do a little bit daily but don’t let studying be your whole day
  • Review notes: 30mins/day, each class from that day
    • Look at important ideas/vocab
      • Prioritize new vocab because language is most fundamental and important tool in any subject
      • Circle abbreviations and make yourself a key somewhere so you don’t forget what the hell that abbreviations meant
      • Check spelling
    • Rewrite/reorganize notes if necessary
      • Format of ideas is just as important as the concepts themselves, esp. when it comes time for exam review
    • This helps you retain the material so you’ll be ahead next time you walk into class
    • Chance to ID any knowledge gaps that you can ask about for next class
  • Keep up with reading
    • Skim text before lecture or at least main topic sentences
    • Jot down anything don’t understand; if lecture doesn’t clarify, ask the professor
    • After lecture: skim again, outline chapter, make vocab flashcards
    • Highlight similar class and lecture notes
      • will definitely be tested on
    • Review and make study questions
  • Study
    • Disconnect from anything irrelevant to study material: help focus and your GPA
    • Don’t limit studying to the night
      • Study whenever, wherever between classes
        • Variety helps focus and motivation
      • Especially if tired at night and can’t transition between subjects
    • Try to study for a specific subject right before/after the class

Red days are when the wolves howl all night and in the morning the birds return with torn out feathers. The days are filled with ambulance sirens. My hair is on fire. Everything moves in slow motion. The flames, the heat, my body soaked in kerosene. The screams in the distance. The monster in the corner, gawking. The stripped birds. And then: the wolves. 

Blue days are heavy and I spend them speaking in spiderwebs. My reflection is clouded and the air is always too humid. The world does anything it can to make my bones weigh me down. My hands, a noose. My head, a haunted house. My heart, turned into a stress ball for when you needed it most.

Green days are spent wondering if it was painful when the sky had stars sewn into it. Wondering if the pain was worth it. Cactus spines stuck underneath skin when you try to drink the water. I am walking the precipice, one foot in the real world and one stuck in dreams. I am an inventor these days, writing fables for a childhood I can’t remember.

Purple days are murky and the owls have dangerous omens. I am on the tightrope. I am living out my childhood dream of being a ballerina. I am the circus act. I am the caged bird. I am spinning on my axis. The bystanders hold a collective breath. They are, after all, just paying for a pretty show. They don’t care about what comes after the fall.

Yellow days are a safe haze, coating my hands in syrup. My blood stays on the inside of my body. My skin actually does its job. Everything is safe and sultry. There is lemonade without sugar. There is your messy mouth again. Everything moves in reverse. There is my candy necklace. There are the sunflowers. There is the sunset we named after us.

Pink days are sunrises and fairy floss. I write about flowers and paint my face in watercolors. There are sugar angels on the counters. The spice containers are overfilling. I am happy and whole. I am kinetic energy and the explosion that comes with. I am rosy cheeked, and roses growing from my wrists. There is no pain. There is only the beauty I’ve torn myself apart to create. I am on the edge of a cliff. I have my wings. When I jump, I am a bird set free.

—  Color Coordinated Days, Angelea Lowes
All The Times You Slept In Bucky's Bed

Summary: In which you’re tired (literally and figuratively) of Bucky waking you up every night with his nightmares so you take matters into your own hands.

Bucky X Reader

Warning: Smut and Fluff

Words: 4,004

A/N: First reader insert fic that I decided to do for @marvelous-fvcks writing challenge. I had prompt 18 “God, I am too tired for this.”- I’m addicted to reader insert fics now. Expect more in the future.

_____

The first time you slept in Bucky’s bed you had gone three days without much sleep. Your bedroom was right next to his so every noise he made woke you up. It just so happened his consistent nightmares caused him to yell and moan in his sleep which in turn woke you up.

You groaned, head pounding as rest was stolen from you and rolled over. Your eyes found the bright red glow of the alarm clock. You allowed for your eyes to adjust before reading the numbers and groaned once more. 2:36am

You sat up, head aching with the motion, limbs protesting as the desire to remain in bed was overwhelming. You stared longly at your pillow contemplating if you should just give in and go back to sleep and deal with Bucky tomorrow when another cry tore through the air.

“Oh for fucks sakes,” you muttered standing up.

You left your room and found yourself in front of Bucky’s doorway. You knocked, three short raps, before opening it.

“Bucky it’s me.”

He didn’t hear you though, oblivious to the world as he thrashed around the bed. His eyes were screwed up tight, his expression the pinnacle of pain. His hands were clutched in his sheets, twist and tearing the fabric with the strength of his grip.

You cautiously walked over to him, aware he was the Winter Soldier and he might lash out in a moment of disarray. You grabbed his shoulders and shook.

“Bucky wake up.” He didn’t seem to hear you, his whimpering echoing in the room.

You shook him harder and spoke louder. “Bucky wake up!”

He gasped his eyes flying open, the gray hues flying wildly around the room until they stopped on your face. It was like he couldn’t see you and was staring through you. His eyes focused and with it came a ripple of confusion followed by the dawn of realization.

“Y/N s-sorry. Did I wake you?” You never heard him speak with such dubiety before, as if he was uncertain of himself. You breathed in heavily, your ire of interrupted sleep fading. This was not the Bucky you saw during the daytime. That Bucky was somebody who carried himself with a sense of pridefulness and attitude.

This Bucky was a broken and scared man. This was the man who had been tortured by Hydra into becoming a shell. An empty shell for them to forge and utilization. Even tho his form was huge; laying in bed coated in perspiration, his eyes wide and afraid, his limbs trembling, he looked like a small and feeble child.

You let out a breath and motioned at him with your hands. “Scoot over.”

“What? Why?”

“I’m getting in bed with you,” You said simply. His eyes widened almost comically and he started sputtering. Definitely not the Bucky you knew during the daytime.
He made no movement though, so you huffed impatiently, eyes traveling to the ceiling as if in a silent appeal, “God, I am too tired for this.

You climbed into his bed and begin nudging him over. Eventually, he got the hint and scooted, allowing you enough room to lay down beside him and throw your arms over his chest.

“What are you-”

You cut him off, shushing him as your fingers found his temple and began a slight massage, “My Ma used to do this for me when I had nightmares. Just relax and go back to sleep.”

It took awhile for his tense body to start to slacken under you and before long his snores are echoing around the room. You let your hands fall and began to stand up from the bed when his body jerked and he let out a sharp hiss. Already the nightmares are starting up once more for him.

You sank back down on the bed and threw your arms around him. In turn, His arms unconsciously came around you too, gripping you tight as if you’re the anchor to the real world that he desperately needed. The whimpering and shivering ceased again and you realized he’s not going to last long unless he’s holding onto something.

Too tired to care you shifted your position to a more comfortable one and closed your eyes. Sleep cane quick and easy to you laying in Bucky’s arms and if you weren’t so exhausted you might have wondered why. But instead, you drifted and slept well into the next day, wrapped up in Bucky’s arms.
____


The second time you sleep in Bucky’s bed it was the next night. You were up late in your room, filling out paperwork that you had been neglecting for Fury and his nagging was reaching the annoying stage so you sat down in your room at 3pm and kept working well past sunset.

It was nearly midnight when you heard the first strained cry coming from the room next to you. You froze, cocking your head to the side to hear better almost convinced that maybe you just imagined it.

But no; he cried out again and you sighed. You stood, cracking your back in the process, and make your way to his room.

Bucky thrashed around violently this time, a stark contrast from last night. You hesitated, unsure on how exactly to approach him without getting hit or kicked from his flailing limbs. After a few seconds of trying to figure it out, you threw caution to the wind and advanced forward.

“Bucky,” you called out but he didn’t hear. His face contorted in agony and a scream made his way up from his throat; muffled only by his clenched teeth. You stepped forward and called out to him louder this time but just like the night before he didn’t hear you.

‘He’s going to hurt himself,’ you thought and stepped up to the edge of his bed. You leaned forward, bracing yourself on one knee and grabbed his shoulder

“Bucky wake up,” you said, your voice louder than normal as you shook him.

Unlike last night he doesn’t wake up gently. This time he sprung forward, grabbed you, and threw you onto the bed; trapping you beneath him. One hand found itself wrapped around your neck squeezing but not too tightly that you couldn’t breathe. The other hand is pinning both of your wrists above your head.

You let out a shaky breath, “Bucky it’s Y/N.”

You were calm on the outside but on the inside, your heart hammered against your rib cage at a mile a minute. Your brain was a tornado of thoughts, mapping out ways for you to get out of this should the need arise.

He stared at you, his eyes glowing in the moonlight. His eyes didn’t register your existence again just like the night before. He’s still trapped in his nightmare and his brain hasn’t caught up with his consciousness yet. Slowly though the dullness around his pupils ceases and awareness trickles forth as reality settles in.

“Y/N?” He questioned, his grip slacked on your neck and wrist.

“Good morning sunshine,” you grinned, hiding the fact that you were unnerved by his aggression. You slipped your hands from under his and cupped them together, rubbing where he held them in an effort to return the feeling to your extremities.

He jumped off of you, almost like a violent flinch. “Oh God Y/N I’m so sorry I-I didn’t mean-”

You cut him off with a wave of your hand and sat up. “Don’t worry about it. You didn’t hurt me.”

He stared at you in disbelief, raking his eyes over your body as if he didn’t trust you and you were hiding some debilitating injury he caused.

You ignored him instead and moved over on the bed to give him enough room to lay down. You patted the bed and grinned at him. He gave you a dubious look and you patted again, firmer this time, encouraging him to join you. Still looking uncertain and a bit confused, he slid under the covers next to you.

You laid down next to him and repeated what you did last night. It took him a little longer than the previous time for your ministrations to relax him and put him to sleep. No doubt he was unnerved by his attack on you.

But soon his frame relaxes and his breath deepens as sleep overcomes him. This time you don’t bother to get out of the bed, instead opting to roll over and fall asleep next to him.
_____


The third time you slept in Bucky’s bed he invited you to.

You raised a delicate eyebrow as he corned you the next night, moving you away from the ears and eyes of everyone else.

His face was flushed a bright red extending down his neck judging by the hue you saw when he pulled at his collar. He wrung his hands together and looked everywhere but you.

“You uh… the past few nights… in my bed,” He tripped over his words, awkwardness filling the every being in his body, which amused you because he reminds you of a pubescent boy attempting to talk to a girl for the first time and not the super soldier trained assassin.

You wondered if he was going to ask you why. Did he think you were in love with him? Was he in love with you and the bed-sharing was sending him mixed signals? Was he not and it was upsetting?

He was still stumbling over his words- God he sounded like Steve- and you were growing impatient wanting him to get to the point.

“Barnes,” you said firmly and he finally stopped long enough to look at you.

“Can you sleep with me again tonight,” he blurted out, his face turning a deeper shade of red, “Because when you’re sleeping next to me for some reason I don’t have any nightmares. It’s just that I swear, I’m not trying to get into your pants. I just feel it would mutually beneficial because neither of us is getting any sleep since my nightmares wake you up and this seems to help. Nothing sexual, I promise. Not that you aren’t attractive enough because you are an incredibly gorgeous-”

“Okay,” you calmly cut off his rambling.

“-Woman… what?” He looked shocked as if he wasn’t expecting that answer.

“Okay,” you repeated.

“Wait, really?”

“Yes.”

He breathes out a breath of air and runs his fingers through his hair. “Okay. Alright good. Thank you. For this. I’ll make it up to you somehow. Maybe I can get you some food? What do you like? Pizza? Ice cream? Or would you prefer something more practical like clothes or gun or-”

“Barnes.” You cut him off again.

He chuckles awkwardly, “Right going now.”

He walked past you and joined Steve and Sam at the other side of the room. You followed his every movement, pondering on why you’ve seen a different side of Bucky three times now. This fills your head with unanswered questions.

Maybe he is in love with you. Maybe you just saw him at his most vulnerable and he is not used to that so you tripped him up. Maybe the Bucky you see daily is a mask to hide the fragile mess Hydra left him in. Maybe it’s all of the above or not at all.

You’re burning with questions but the answers don’t matter.

And so that night you crawled into Bucky’s bed before the nightmares have even begun and position yourself next to his body letting sleep wash over you.
_____

It’s been several weeks since you started sleeping in Bucky’s bed, so on the 27th night, you find yourself walking into his room after a mission automatically. Your joints are aching and you’re pretty sure your body is one big massive bruise.

You’re dead on your feet and all you want to do is sleep. You peel off your clothes, shedding all but your shirt and panties before climbing into his bed.

You don’t even consider the implications of sleeping in your underwear next to a man. But Bucky does and that night he doesn’t sleep his eyes glued to your dips and curves.

Every sigh you make sends a pool of want and need to his lower abdomen. And so he spends the entire night awake fighting an internal battle within himself.

When the first signs of light protrude over the horizon he practically sprints out of bed and spends the rest of the day in the gym working off his frustrations.
____

The 28th time you sleep in Bucky’s bed he’s getting back at you for what you put him through. You had realized of course when you woke up and saw you weren’t wearing pants. You felt bad for the guy but in your defense, you barely knew how to say your name let alone the implication of sleeping in the bed with a man in nothing but your panties. (And a little part of you wonders why it was so automatic to do that)

Still, that night you make sure to wear appropriate attire but it seems Bucky is not ready to forgive you. He’s dressed in only his boxers and nothing else.

You gulp, eyes roaming all over his body. He smirked when he noticed this before patting the bed next to him. “What’s a matter, doll?”

He’s teasing you and you know it. Your breath shuddered as you carefully climbed in next to him and laid down far enough apart that he can’t touch you but close enough that you feel his body heat.

That didn’t seem to be the end of it tho because he turned onto his side and slung his arm over your body.

His fingers brushed against the exposed skin above your pant line, sending a jolt of electricity dancing across your skin. Your senses burst into overdrive and suddenly you’re aware of Bucky.

How his body molds perfectly to yours. The heat radiating off his skin. His breath on the back of your neck making your hair stand on edge.

Everything in you screamed to take him then and there, but you will your breath to even out and your heart to stop slamming in your chest.

Even still, that night you don’t get any sleep.
____

The next night you both called a truce and slept in shirts and shorts and as far away from each other as possible. Still, the sexual tension remains and it bleeds out of the bedroom and into daily life.

When you’re on missions, training, or even just relaxing the want and need is thick in the air between you two. So much so that the others have started a betting pool to see how long you’ll last. (You pretended not to notice how they conveniently leave an empty space next to him at the dinner table for you to sit that. Or how they’re all suddenly too busy to go on missions with him and volunteer you to go instead.)

It isn’t until the 76th night of sleeping in Bucky’s bed that anything happens. That night Tony had hosted a gala and after one too many drinks you found yourself dancing with Bucky and neither of you can keep your hands off each other.
By the time you leave the gala the want and need in your lower abdomen has grown so considerably you barely make it to the elevator before you crashed your lips into him.

He gripped your thighs and pulled you up to wrap your legs around his waist. The elevator opened and he carried you to his room not breaking the feverish kiss between you two.

You made it to his room before he slammed you against his door and attacked your neck. Hands are roaming everywhere between you two. One of his slipped passed the slit in your dress and found itself rubbing your underwear making you moan.

“You’re fucking soak,” he growled.

“I’ve been wanting to do this for a while now,” you confessed and rolled your hips against him. He growled again from the stimulation and carried you to the bed.
Both of your clothes are off before you even know what’s going on and he’s trailing a path of kisses from your chin, down your neck, between your breasts, past your navel, and to your thigh.

You gasped feeling his mouth attack the bundle of nerves you desperately wanted him to touch. Your body is like fire, burning with desire. Your hands fly to his hair when he sticks in two digits and curls them.

“God- fuck,” you can’t even find the words to say. The heat grows in your lower abdomen and with a cry you’re falling over the edge.

When you come down you find him kissing you again, whispering praises to you. You wrapped your legs around his waist again and grind against him, the feeling of longing and want throbbing in your lower abdomen.

“Please Bucky,” you whisper to him and with a kiss, he enters you.

It’s like nothing you’ve ever experienced before. It’s like all your senses have been dialed to a thousand. It’s like a supernova exploding in your mind. You’ve had sex before but this is different.

A part of your brain whispers to you wondering why.

But it silences as you feel the heat growing again and you cum with a cry. Bucky follows shortly after, his forehead pressed against yours, his fingers entwined with yours too.

He rolled off and cleaned you off, before settling down next to you. This time you’re both wrapped in each other’s arms and you fall asleep, feeling his lips pressing against the top of your head.
____

The next morning your brain asks why again while you’re watching him make breakfast (and ignoring the exchanging of money between hands from the rest of the group).

It hits you like a train. You’re in love with him. It’s obvious now that you think about it and you wondered why you never saw it before.

But you keep it to yourself.

Until the 149th night of sleeping in Bucky’s bed. He’s injured on a mission and in the med bay and you refused to leave his side. Instead of going back to his room, you climb into the hospital bed next to him and wrap your arms around him.

“What are you doing, the bed would be more comfortable,” he asks.

“I can’t sleep without you there,” you answer.

“Why,” he chuckles.

You hide your face into his neck. “Because I love you, you idiot.”

Silence.

And then. “Look at me.”

You shake your head.

“Look at me, doll. Please, Y/N,” he pleads.

You hesitate before lifting your head to look at him. Your heart nearly stops at the look of pure happiness and adoration on his face. It takes your breath away.

“You love me?” He whispers, stunned as if he can’t believe it.

You nod your head. “I realized it the night of Tony’s gala.”

“That was so long ago!”

You frown and feel heat creep up to your face. “I… uh didn’t know how to tell you.”

“Y/N, I love you too,” he says. You let out a breath, feeling tears of happiness spring forth before you crush your lips to his. You want to ask him how long and when did he realize but you’re interrupted by Dr. Cho coming into the room and yelling at you for making out with her patient.
____

It isn’t until the 365th night of sleeping in Bucky’s bed that you finally have your answer.

He wakes you up at midnight kissing your shoulders and nudging you with his nose.

“Wake up doll,” he whispers against your skin.

“Mmm Bucky what time is it,” you yawn.

“It’s midnight.”

“Why are you waking me up at midnight?”

He straddles your back and lays down, engulfing you in warm. “Because I couldn’t wait to wish you a Happy Anniversary.”

This catches you by surprise and causes you to laugh. “Bucky it’s not our Anniversary.”

“Yes it is, wanna know why?”

“Hmm” you ask closing your eyes again.

“Because a year ago today I was woken up from a nightmare by this girl who I thought was an angel at first. She was so beautiful. And then she crawled in bed with me and I was absolutely positive I had died right there and this was heaven. Right then and there was the moment I knew I was I love with you.” He shifts his body and brings his hand up to your face.

“At that moment I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me Y/N L/N?”

Your eyes shoot open and in front of your face in his hand is a ring. Your eyes are wide as if hardly daring to believe. Your brain has ceased to work, too stunned to remember how to breathe.

You pivot your body and sit up, “Oh my god Bucky.”

The tears start to flow from your face as what can only be described as pure joy is bursting through you.

You manage to nod your head and choke out a small “yes” before he’s holding you and kissing you.

The ring is slipped on your finger and suddenly you picked up and spun around both of you shouting in happiness. The draws the attention of everyone else who bursts in through your door.

“What’s with all the noise,” Steve asks.


You can’t even manage the words and Bucky isn’t paying them any attention, looking at you in his arms. Instead of saying it you hold up your hand with the ring on it.

A beat.

“Oh my god Y/N!” It’s Natasha that’s first to react and she’s hugging both of you. The rest of the others follow suit congratulating both of you. Champagne is brought out and you’re all celebrating your engagement.

That night nobody gets any sleep.
___

The 730th night of sleeping in Bucky’s bed, it becomes your bed too.
___
The 1,647th night of sleeping in Bucky’s bed is the first night you awake without him there.

Your heart clenches in agony and you sit up, your eyes burning with unshed tears. Your chest is heavy with brokenness and simultaneously you feel hollow and alone.

Your hand finds the spot on the bed where Bucky’s body is supposed to be but it’s empty and cold. He hasn’t been there in a while.

You get out of bed and make your way next door to your old room which you haven’t used in a while. When you open the door your heart stops hammering upon seeing Bucky in the far end of the room.

You moved to him promptly and when you reached him, you put your arms around his chest and laid your head on his back.

His hand came up and cupped yours. “Everything okay doll?”

“Yeah, I just had a nightmare about you,” you muttered against his back.

“What about?”

“I don’t remember now,” you stated, the fear of the nightmare alleviating as you took in Bucky’s scent and warmth and touch.

“What are you doing in here baby,” you ask. He shifts and turns around and kisses your forehead.

“Daydreaming.” He answers.

“About what,” returning one of his kisses. He moves down your chin and neck.

“The future,” he says kneeling in front of you and kissing your swollen belly. “With you and our baby.”

“You’re daydreaming in the nursery when you could be dreaming in bed,” you chuckled. Your hands thread through his hair and he leans into the touch, eyelids fluttering closed.

“Come back to bed baby. We won’t get a full night sleep ever again for the next 18 years. We should relish in it now,” you say and he laughs, following you back to his bedroom.

“I love you Y/N.”

“I love you too.”

An Open Letter to the Hetalia Fandom

We are not the people we were before, we changed, and we can continue to change. Sure this fandom has done many horrible things in its early years and honestly I wasn’t even in the fandom at that point in time, and the point is some actions were plain wrong, we know, but it’s honestly disheartening.

Please, please, I’m calling out to the true fans who cares about this fandom I learned to call my family, let’s prove that we can do good, prove them wrong for the things they still think about us. I’ve met more real people than I could ever meet in the real world. Please, I’m begging you, don’t let this fandom die, don’t let them degrade us, prove that we are good people with good intentions, that we can be real mature people who can contribute to society. Make them see what I see, a fandom that welcomes all people no matter what age or race.

Please share the word.

((I am tagging people who made me see that hetalia isn’t as bad as people say, please help me get the word around.

@hetafacts for getting the truth around the fandom and keeping it alive.

@urufu-arts for being brave enough to stand up and make a fundraiser for the victims of the Hurricane Harvey.

@ask-demon-denmark for being a good friend, and to everybody else.

  @annotated-hetalia for helping us connect with the world with real world facts from the hetalia comic strip and series

. @hetascanlations for translating Himaruya’s webcomic and sharing it to the world.

 @k-y-t-s-k-o for being an inspiration to me and many more artists out there.

  @ellawritesficssometimes for reliving and proving that our fanfiction can be great no matter what context.

 @ciakirkland for introducing me to this beautiful world. You will always be in my heart. 

And to the ask-blogs, artists, writers, archives, translators and everyone who supports and loves this fandom. Thank you for giving everyone something to love and protect, thank you so much

Sometimes you’ve gotta conquer the world and sometimes you need to grab an extra blanket out of the cupboard and sit on your balcony or outside your house or on your lawn at 1:12am with your feet slowly getting used to the cold, your mind free to wander and tears free to fall. And when the sun starts to rise, you’ll gather up yourself, walk back inside, and start again.

You’re Not Dad

A/N: Not that anyone cares I’ve been hella busy and haven’t had time to literally write anything and I still really don’t, but I’m going to anyways bc I have some inspiration. Enjoy. Feedback is always appreciated(:

Characters: Dean x sister!reader, Sam x sister!reader

Warnings: swearing, angst, overprotective Dean, mention of death, yelling, very close relationship b/w Dean and reader? let me know if I missed anything

Tagging: @winchesters-favorite-girl because I think she might be interested and I really love and look up to her as a writer. I hope you don’t mind.

Originally posted by canonspngifs

Originally posted by zest-wincest

You loved your brothers more than anything in the world. I mean, you were practically raised by them. John was never around, your mom was just some quick fuck that John had on a hunt. As soon as demons got word that John Winchester knocked up some chick and he had another child, they came and killed your mother when you were only a few months old. Thankfully, your mom got John on the phone as they were trying to get in and he was in town so he saved you. Not your mom though. Dean had been 16 at the time, Sam was 12. You were by far the baby of the family and Sam and Dean made it their mission to protect you from everything. And when I say everything, I mean literally everything. You were never even supposed to have been born. But nevertheless, here you were seventeen years later, alive and kicking, living in the bunker with Sam and Dean, the two best brothers in the entire world.

Keep reading

Three Days Grace

Aries- “Animal I Have Become”, “Break”, “ Nothing’s Fair in Love and War”, and  “I Hate Everything About You”

Taurus- “Time of Dying”, “The Real You”, and “Over and Over” 

Gemini- “Someone Who Cares”, “Scared”, and “It’s All Over” 

Cancer- “Fallen Angel”, “Over and Over”,  “Let You Down” and “Home” 

Leo- “Break” and “Let It Die” 

Virgo- “The High Road” 

Libra- “The Good Life”, “Take Me Under”, “Unbreakable Heart”, and “Lost in You” 

Scorpio- “I Hate Everything about You”, “Chalk Outline”, and  “Gone Forever” 

Sagittarius- “Never Too Late” and “Get Out Alive” 

Capricorn-  “Animal I Have Become”, “Misery Loves My Company”, “Tell Me Why”, and “World So Cold”

Aquarius- “Just Like You”, “Human Race”, “Riot” and “I am Machine” 

Pisces-  “Pain”, “Lost in You”, and “Painkiller”

there’s something to be said for nights in. nights with friends and siblings and lovers spent wrapped up in blankets, on balconies, in bedrooms, on sofas… putting the world on pause for those you care about. but there’s also something to be said for nights out. nights with those very same people in streets, parking lots, crowded cars, music turned high or playing low… where the world is in motion all around you.

Yes All Men

I was thinking recently about how women are expected to “protect ourselves” but then men typically get upset when we’re wary of them.

Ted Bundy was a normal, unassuming looking guy. He murdered well over 30 women, displayed their severed heads, raped their corpses. 

He often caught his victims by wearing a fake cast or sling, appearing helpless, preying on the learned nurturing and helpfulness women have instilled in them. He’d have them help him take something to his car and then knock them out. 

This is why you shouldn’t ask women to give men they barely know the benefit of the doubt. You shouldn’t discourage women from listening to their own instincts by calling them mean or bitches for being cautious. 

So if a woman is ever wary around you I don’t care how nice you think you are, don’t take it so fucking personally. It’s literally a matter of life and death, and in the real world we can never know which men actually view women as human beings and which view us as potential prey. 

What you may find attractive
  • Aries: Sarcasm, wit, busy bodies, cleverness, kindness, someone who needs a hero.
  • Taurus: Thoughtfulness, intelligence, patience, sensitivity, someone who can take a realtionship slow.
  • Gemini: Laughter, humor, intelligence, long conversations, playfulness, someone whose easygoing about relationships.
  • Cancecr: Romance, charm, compliments, giggles, emotions, someone who will be very attentive and always by your side.
  • Leo: Intensity, openness, playfulness, romance, humor, friendliness, someone as playful as you.
  • Virgo: Gentleness, curiosity, mystery, sweetness, dark eyes, someone who wants a very real realtionship, no games.
  • Libra: Compliments, talkative people, flamboyance, humor, sweetness, someone who wants a very affectionate realtionship.
  • Scorpio: Deep thoughts, wit, charm, classic style, intriguing conversations, someone who understands you, and knows you don't give love to just anyone.
  • Sagittarius: Independence, realism, intelligence, go getter attitude, someone who can keep up with you.
  • Capricorn: Realism, romance, kindness, honesty, charisma, calmness, someone who understands your lifestyle and won't try and change you.
  • Aquarius: Originality, independence, off beat personality, creativity, someone who wants to go out with a bang in this world.
  • Pisces: Romance, care, giggles, charm, thoughtful compliments, someone who is as romantic as you.
  • Check Venus!
If Planets Could Talk to You About Life

Mars: Life is rough, but hey, you’ve got me to help you through it. Just keep going in my direction.

Venus: I agree with Mars, life is often rough, but I’m here to help you find the parts of it that aren’t so rough.

Mercury: Let’s take a look at life, observe what’s going on around us so we know what to do.

Moon: Life is scary, but as long as you keep me close it won’t feel so bad.

Sun: When life gets rough, you can always fall back on me. I’ll remind you why you’re alive.

Ceres: C’mon now, we need to take care of life so it’s not rough later.

Juno: Here’s a part of your life that you should let somebody else handle. It’s not something you need to do.

Jupiter: Life is an adventure, it’s up to you to find out how to explore it all.

Saturn: Yes, I know life has its limitations, but you never learn if you always do everything right the first time. Failure is what makes achievement worthwhile.

Uranus: Limitations are for squares, there’s something else you can do to get around them.

Neptune: Life in the real world might get scary, but there’s always another world you can go to for a bit if it becomes too much.

Pluto: No easy way to say this, life can get hard. Really hard. You have to get harder when it does.

“My mom is better than yours” - Batmom x Damian Wayne

Summary : The Kent family have invited your family over for dinner, and of course, as usual, Damian and Jon don’t quite…behave. 

I just wanted to write a short little cute fic with Damian and his mama because I just love the idea of Damian being super proud of his Batmom and blahblahblah maybe it’s a bit too long sorry. I hope you will like it

My masterlist blog : https://ella-ravenwood-archives.tumblr.com

_________________________________________________

Bruce thought it was extremely cute, how Damian’s eyes always seem to shine when looking at you. How his face brightens. Even how ashamed he is when you scold him when he’s too cocky, or simply being a plain brat. 

The kid thought you were just the best damn thing on this planet. 

He admired everything you did…

The Batman had to admit it, sometimes, he was a bit jealous. 

But mostly, he just thought it was really cute, to see his boy completely accepting you as his mother. Hell, he was even calling you “Mama” (damn period dramas) now !

You were the one he considered his mom (Talia actually tried to kill you a few times because of that, jealous beyond everything of you and the love “her” son seemed to have for you…She tried harder when Damian told her that she was “never his mom”, that you showed him what a real mother was, and also, when she realized how in love Bruce was with you, while she had to drug him to get him to sleep with her…Yeah, pretty jealous. You always pulled through though, mostly thanks to your boys, husband and superfriends).

Well, to be honest, he never doubted the fact that you’d get along with him. You had a special effect on people. If you really put your mind to it, you can convince anyone to do what you want, you can win anyone’s heart in a little flutter of your damn beautiful eyelashes…

When Damian first met you, he was most disagreeable, and you…grounded him. “Young man, in your room, no dessert for you tonight”, and he was so stunned that he did it, though he didn’t even listen to his father at the time, and thought he knew everything better than everyone ! He knew you only for a few minutes, and he already had more respect for you than for anyone else. 

Sometimes, Bruce suspected that you might be a meta-human, because the power you could have over people with your magnificent aura was…something. But he tested you in every way possible, and he had to admit that, you were just like him. A simple human. A simple human with incredible abilities. 

Yes. Bruce always thought it was extremely cute the way his son, your son to the both of you, almost worshipped you. 

Well, your older kids did too. Again, there was just a way about you…

You started dating Bruce when he first took young Richard Grayson in, about twelve years ago (right after Talia drugged him actually), when he was barely 8 years old and heartbroken because of his parents’ death…And though you were merely twenty, quite younger than Bruce really, you took your job as a surrogate mother for Dick very seriously. Quickly, the boy asked you if he could call you mom, if his own mother would be mad and…well, the hug you gave him was answer enough. Though he was twenty and had his own flat in Bludhaven now, Dick was still quite the momma’s boy. 

It was pretty much the same with Jason. You winked at him and told him it was pretty cool and brave to try and steal the batmobile’s wheels, and boom, you had him wrapped around your little fingers. He lived for your bedtime stories and cuddle when he had trouble sleeping. 

Tim was even easier to treat you like his mom. After only a few months he was already introducing you as his mother, and that was that. Just natural. Unlike Jason and Dick, his birth mother wasn’t exactly…the best, and you gave him a chance to have a real mom. One that would die for her son, do anything for him,  even if it meant staying up all night to sing him soothing songs while he had the flu, putting ridiculous costumes to go trick or treating with him, or, more recently, since he was now 15 (already ?!), gaming with him until you’d both pass out out of exhaustion. 

Quite like Tim, Damian never had the love of a “real” mother. How it should be. The mom taking care of her son, no matter what. Not letting him do whatever he wants, but making sure he’s happy…and so, just like his older brothers before him, he came to simply adore you. 

Keep reading

serious advice for those new to tumblr/young and on tumblr

–Don’t let this website become your life.
–Please take this seriously, while you may see a lot of funny posts about ‘I’m deleting’ and ‘I hate tumblr’ the community as a whole on this website is seriously bad.
–Formulate your own opinions, and don’t let this site brainwash them into you.
–The mob mentality that often follows arguments blows stuff really out of proportion, and in the end it doesn’t matter, I promise you.
–POST WHAT YOU WANT, NOT WHAT WILL GET YOU FOLLOWERS.
–Anons are mean. Turn them off if you have to. You aren’t weak for doing so.
–Take care of yourself. Download xkit and blacklist stuff you don’t want to see.
–Sending hate is never worth it.
–The social justice you see here is not an accurate representation of real-world activism. You do not EVER have to post a social justice thing if you don’t want to.
–You do not need to be part of a minority to be loved
–If you are part of a majority, you matter and deserve to love yourself all the same
–Mental illness is NOT pretty
–IF SOMETHING APPEARS IN YOUR INBOX ASKING YOU TO CLICK ON THEIR BLOG TO TEST A VIDEO GAME OR SOME SHIT, FOR FUCK’S SAKE, DON’T CLICK IT

Just, don’t get too swept away by this site. Go outside. Blog other places. Watch Netflix for a while. Do what you gotta do.

Some Tips on Being a Senior Student

There are sooo many posts on how to make the most out of your first year of university/college, but very few on what to do when you’re reaching the end of those years and are about to enter the Real Real World. This post is to help you make that last year count!

1) Focus on your grades!

This is the time when having good grades is the most important. By now, you’ve gotten into some sort of studying rhythm and know what works for you, so use that to your advantage to put in a little extra effort and push. No-one really cares about your grades from previous years if your grades at the end are awesome. If you have some kind of capstone project, make sure that it is done really well so that you can use it as an example of your work!

2) Get familiar with Careers’ Services

If your university has a Careers’ Services office, make an appointment with them. Chances are, they will have tonnes of professional advice on how to improve your CV/resumé, interview training, and connections to companies that want to hire graduates!! Often, these services are free!! Use them!! 

3) Spice up your CV!

As awesome as your transcript and degree may be, plenty of people will have the same degree as you. Go over your past few years and make a list of all the extracurriculars you did. Did you write for the university newspaper? Treasurer of the MSA? Run a pretty successful instagram and blog? Add it to your CV (resumé for you Americans). If you’re not sure about how to make it sounds “professional”, don’t be afraid to list it in terms of the skills you learn rather than your actual position (if in doubt, refer to point 2).

4) Build a professional wardrobe

When you’re out shopping for clothes and you see a cute blazer or comfortable shirts/blouses on sale, give them a try. It’s so much better to show up for a interview in clothes that you’ve gotten used to and are comfortable in, than a brand new suit that’s awkward and feels like you’re playing dress-up in. Try incorporating some “professional” clothing pieces into your everyday wear every now and then so you can figure out what you like wearing and what’s your style. It’s also a lot cheaper to build up a wardrobe over time rather than buying things all at once for your new job.

5) Organise your opportunities

Get a spreadsheet with job/post-graduate applications going. Sort by application date. If you hear of a cool-sounding graduate programme, make a note of it and research it as soon as possible. Competition can be tough, so be prepared for rejections. If you’re thinking of taking a post-graduate gap year (which is what I’m considering at the moment), look for short courses, internships, part-time work or how you’re going to save money to travel and organise that. There are lots of options!

5) Network effectively

By now, you probably have a favourite professor or three who thinks you’re a pretty decent kid! Rather than trying to go to everyone’s office hours (probably the most common college advice on studyblr), talk to your favourite profs in passing, ask them for projects or how their day is going. They’re really great people and excellent mentors.

6) Keep contact with friends and family

I know it’s difficult, but it is really important to have that social and emotional support available. It can be tough, but you will really appreciate having people who you can call on or just to spend time with. 

7) It’s okay to not have anything figured out yet

Science majors and Humanities majors often have the same problem - the incessant “so what are you going to do with that physics/english/history/biology/philosophy degree? Become a teacher?” questions. If you want to be a teacher - that’s awesome - but if you don’t, this question can be the most frustrating. Yes, you know that you won’t be getting a 5-figure starting salary like your cousin who did an engineering/medical/accounting degree, but at least you spent your time studying something you enjoyed! It’s okay to not have an immediate plan of action for what you’re going to do after graduating, but you’ll figure it out eventually! There really is no rush.


I hope this post is helpful! If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to message me or send an ask! Don’t forget to take the coolest graduation pictures ever! Happy studying!

xx Munira

anonymous asked:

As you're LGBTQ+ yourself, what is your opinion of straight people telling us what it is to be LGBTQ+?

Dear anon you will not like this. Unpopular opinion coming.

Listen, i don’t care. I hate this whole ‘we have to hate straight people on this site’ bullshit that is going on. Yes, I’m LGBTQ+. Yes, I live and know and talk to a dozen straights daily. Does it affect me if they say something offensive? No. I simply don’t care.  Because my life is my life and their life is their life. The real world is a lot more diffuse and harder to differentiate into boxes than tumblr makes it out to be. There are not ‘the straight’ and ‘the LGBTQ+’. There is your boss, your clients, your parents, your friends, your colleagues, your fellow students, your professors and so many more. And you have to adapt to every single one of them - as straight or LGBTQ+. If you’re straight and you hate your job you need to put just the same mask of Mrs Sunshine on as you would do as LGBTQ+. I’m also a firm believer that sexuality is a private thing and doesn’t need to be written all over your front; hence, you don’t have to tell it to everyone. It can always happen that someone says something insensitive. Hell, sometimes people don’t even know they said something insensitive - but contrary to what tumblr makes you believe it is okay to say ‘Hey, that’s not okay’ and most people will listen. You don’t need to insult them or bash them or block them or be oh-so-offended. If you stay civil about it people will be civil too and mostly even apologize. I get it: words hurt. But the hurt goes away and people can be educated. You can’t have everything. But war and hate is not the way to go. 

advice for the signs
  • aries: you're full of ideas and they're always amazing! you are so much smarter than you give yourself credit for, even though you try to appear like you're a bit of a daredevil, you don't always like to come too far out of your cozy little comfort zone. but I promise, if you come out a bit more you can experience so many exciting things, and your abilities will make you shine like a star in the night sky.
  • taurus: not only are you are a badass, you're also super cool. if there are any haters its only because they want to be like you - really though. you just have an aura about you that pulls people in and once they get to know you, they don't ever want to get away. people want to overindulge in you, and if that wears you out then take a break and don't feel bad about it, your friends know you'll come back at the end of the day.
  • gemini: you're not a two-faced backstabbing bitch, you are a beautiful person who struggles with having to listen to an angel and a devil on your shoulders all day, which I can only imagine is super tough but you've done an incredible job to even come all this way and you should be so proud of yourself, I know I am. and lets take a moment to appreciate how you can walk into a room and suddenly be everyone's best friend with your natural charm and easy-going nature. you could take a bullet in the chest and your smile won't even falter. you're so determined to get what you want and you're so passionate and just everything you do is admirable. keep going, you rock this world.
  • cancer: if we're being real here, you don't actually cry *that* much. this is what it is - you have so many emotions swirling inside of you and they are like a beautiful storm of bright lights. and you should continue to let that out and share that beauty with everyone! but even with all that, you can be pretty hardcore and you are so strong, inside that whirlpool is a fire than burns bright, you should show people your intense passions as well as your caring side.
  • leo: you are amazing, and everyone around you knows it. if you're being too hard on yourself, lighten up a little because so far you've done everything right. everything happens for a reason, and if you feel guilty or sad about something just remember that your experiences have shaped who you are today - a beautiful, wonderful, magical creature with sparkling eyes, a loving soul and fabulous hair.
  • virgo: you work so hard to be on top of the game and I know how stressful that can be, but trust me when I'm saying that if you're doing the best you can, please don't push yourself any further. I'm sure you know what it feels like to get 3 hours sleep only to just scrape everything in on time, but you're doing just fine and please remember to reach out to your friends and loved ones and talk about how youre feeling. honestly, letting out any negativity makes you feel so, so much better, and you deserve the best.
  • libra: it's not that you're indecisive, you just like to weigh out all the pros and cons of a situation before you go into something - which is such a good idea, and I admire you for that. I bet you wish you had a crystal ball and could see the future to know how your decisions will turn out, huh? but the reality is that you should stop worrying about about the future and live in the moment. if you're not focusing on the present, you won't get to where you want to be in the future, and we definitely don't want to see you somewhere where your talents aren't being showcased.
  • scorpio: your personality is just so magnetic and you're so hypnotic, so many people absolutely adore you and would do anything for you - but sometimes they might not be 100% certain that the feelings are mutual. now, I know you love your friends and family so, so much with a fiercely strong love, but would it kill you to tell people that you love them and how you're feeling sometimes? everyone is here to help you and guide you on your journey to reaching the stars, but you can't build your rocket ship without the help of others.
  • sagittarius: you are incredible and so smart, it actually makes people stop in their tracks when you open your mouth and spout some beautiful, philosophical words of wisdom. or even just opening your mouth to say anything. everything about you is great but I'm not sure you appreciate yourself as much as you should. all the friends you have who love you should be an indication of how great you are. if you don't learn to love yourself, you might not be able to see through and out of your own little bubble and actually notice how much people care about you. because they care so, so much. don't you ever doubt that.
  • capricorn: your motto is work hard and don't take shortcuts, which is amazing and everyone admires you for that. it takes a lot of hard work and dedication to be you, and even if nobody mentions it, everyone is impressed. you're gonna go far, kid. but know that even if you're stuck in a rut right now you just need to jump a little higher and climb out. if you're stressed, talk to someone you trust and just open up and tell them what youre feeling. help them help you, and everything will be okay.
  • aquarius: we're not emotionless, we have a lot of feelings and we just choose not to express them because we're scared of people being overwhelmed by us, and we like to trust someone 100% before we open up. and there is nothing wrong with that. you're so good at listening to people's problems/how they feel and your advice is 10/10, but if you don't take time to talk to people about how you're feeling, you bottle everything up and one day it'll get so full that the lid will burst - and I know you're afraid of letting out all your feelings in one go, I definitely am. the only way around that is to let it out, bit by bit, slowly and over the years, to maintain your composure and sanity. and nobody will see you any different or judge you if you open up to them.
  • pisces: you're passionate, your creativity is out of this world, you're so good at helping people and you don't have a selfish bone in your body. you're always so up for helping people, and that is amazing! you're compassionate like no other, and your ideas are off-the-charts crazy cool. and you're not weak! you are perfectly capable of putting up your barriers, you just like to trust people enough to keep them down a lot of the time. and you're definitely not weak either, you've probably lived through some heartbreaking experiences, and you're still able to walk around with your head up and your heart open. now thats real strength.
The scariest thing about Hannah bakers suicide

I haven’t seen a death scenes that have left such a mark on me like Hannah Bakers. It wasn’t even when she was taking her life that freaked me out. It was the absolute nothingness that came when her parents found her. It was silent except for the bakers distress. You see this girl constantly having to fight the world that won’t give her break that you so desperately wanted to reach out and say you cared but you couldn’t because you’re a real person and she isn’t. You wanna be there but you can’t and it makes you scared and uncomfortable and there is nothing you can do.

(sorry for any typos)