you are too stuck up to be silly

September is stuck under my nails.
I slip into the moments 
we spend before work, when the dog
sneaks into our bed and gets so jealous
when our faces come too close.
You kiss me in every silly way
we can think of
and make fun of the way
I curl up into my coffee.
We talk politics over pancakes,
and while we might never see the same way,
I know we share the same vision of happiness.
 
On the drive to work,
I plan the way we will escape this;
sneak out of the system during the night
and watch the sunrise from the coast.
The mornings won’t just be moments
and we will stop wasting our lives
rushing to work.
We’ll have land to grow,
and room to dream,
and I’ll forget how it feels to miss you.
—  Schuyler Peck, Morning Moments
Shorty- Sam Winchester

Anon:

Hellos! I just love your imagines. May I suggest a Sam Winchester fic where the reader is very short (like 5'0) and Sam teases her about it. The teasing starts out as fluffy and Sam tells her why she’s super cute. Smut perhaps??? XO


“Sam if I have to tell you one more time I’m going to shot your hand off!” this threat just earned a chuckle from the giant that thought it was acceptable to rest his elbow on the top of your head.

“Common it’s comfy” he chuckled but moved off you.

You crossed your arms over your chest and scowl “Well go lean on Dean.”

“Will you two shut up, I’m trying to concentrate.” Dean scowled trying to read a book about witches.

Sam put his finger to his lips and you stuck your tongue out in return, he could be so silly at times. You knew his short jokes we’re just him playing but sometimes he just went too far.

“Common lets go out and give Dean some privacy hu shorty?” he smiled and motioned to the door.

You grumbled under your breath “at least I don’t have to duck to get through certain doors.”

The both of you decided to go to the bar that was next to the motel. It was sleazy but you could get a cheap drink.

“Do you want to sit at the bar?” Sam asked pointing after holding the door open for you politely.

You shook your head. You actually would like to sit at the bar but you knew had make a joke about your feet not being able to touch the foot support of the bar stools.

You knew you were short. Really short. Or at least short enough to have everyone else tower over you. I mean, yeah, five foot two isn’t really that bad, but come on, you’re an adult. Shouldn’t you have grown more or something?

“Want something to eat?”

You nodded, you were actually staring but then again when were you not, your appetite was worse than deans and surely that should help you grow.

“Want a kid’s meal?” Sam chuckled looking so smug with himself.

“No I don’t. I’m short. I’m not a child.” You spoke bitterly and it seemed to take Sam off guard.

His eyes widened at your tone and he held up his hands in defence. “Hey I’m sorry, I was just joking.”

“Well I’ve had enough Sammy.” The bar was almost empty so you could raise your voice at him slightly.

“Of the jokes? I was only teasing y/n, I didn’t mean any harm by them?”

“Well they’ve been getting on my nerves. Just because you’re a giant and I’m a less than normal sized person doesn’t mean you can pick on me.” You get up ready to go back to the motel room but his hand came out and grabbed your wrist to stop you.

He didn’t stand up so he was almost your height and he looked into your eyes.

“I didn’t want to hurt your feelings or anything. Being short is nothing wrong, I think it’s really cute. I guess that was just my way of flirting.”

“Flirting?” you blushed madly.

He started to ramble about how he can’t talk to you without making a joke encase you wouldn’t want to talk to him but in the middle of the rambling you couldn’t help but look at his lips and move forward, kissing him to shut him up.

He placed his hand behind your head after he realised and you ran your fingers in his hair.

“I’m sorry” you blushed after the kiss broke.

~Paris

aight u lovely muffins, I finally have internet back, but I have to hit the hay (gotta get up at 4:30) but i’ll be around in the morning for sure! You guys should *ahem* totally send some cute or silly asks for my boi to respond to in the morning! we could use some light hearted stuff to distract from the total shit-show life is currently!

I’m super proud of my country for how it handled the attack today. I’m just not looking forward to how Mr Toupée is going to try and spin it across the pond. As sucky as this is I’d like to focus on how awesomely quick our services got to the scene, how fast the threat was tackled and tbh how fricking great it is that because of our gun laws the tossbag didn’t have one. Keep carrying on, my screwed up silly bint of a country. You may be a bit stuck up, but I’d not want to be anywhere else.

And that’s more or less all I’ll say on the matter because too much coverage means panic and them winning. I love you all and all my best wishes to anyone affected in the capital.

The second

You’re restless tonight, which happens occationally.

Too hot, too cold, left side, right side, back, front, unable to sleep and yet too tired to focus on anything… The struggle is real.

Finally you give up and stare unseeing into the darkness beside your bed. And then parts of it seem to be moving.

Head is under the covers before you even register the wave of fear.

It’s silly. Nothing is really there. Its just your mind playing tricks on you.

But you cant escape that little whisper thats terrified, thats sure something awful is waiting out there and would get you if you stuck your head out.

There’s no sounds though and it gets hot fast… Surely a breath of cooler air won’t hurt.

That’s when something - someone- lands on top of you.

You’re screaming and thrashing before you know it as the person sits on you and laughs as he pokes at you, pressing his face against the comforter so you can feel the fabric move as he speaks.

“Come out and play~”

You can’t even think straight or really fight back pinned as you are by your bedding, but you struggle and struggle and struggle against him until it happens.

Your foot kicks off the blanket.

Almost immediately theres two sets of hands on the leg - on for your ankle and one for your upper thigh - and the person laughs and says “gotcha!” just as they begin to pull.

Your yanked over the side of the bed, landing hard on the ground in a tangle of sheets.

It’s day light.

Nothings wrong.

You cry.

“Only animals’ eyes are supposed to glow at night” - Derek Hale

Request for anonymous: Derek hale #18?

A/N: Sorry if this took too long! It was kind of complicated coming up with an idea and I had to think about this one for a little while. I’m sorry it’s really short and silly. Still working on some other requests, hopefully they’ll be out really soon. Hope you enjoy!

… … … … … … … … .

“Derek!” you shouted.
“I need help!”

He sighed and turned around to see you standing right in the middle of the livingroom. You always got in trouble one way or the other.

"What’s wrong now?” he asked.

“My shoelace got stuck in the crack of your old ass floors” you said while waving your hands in frustration.

He made his way over to you, bent down and tugged your shoelace loose.
Today the both of you had had an awful quiet night and you were pretty bored, so you decided to play ‘2 truths, 1 lie’, because why the hell not.

“I’ll go first. You know how this works, right? I tell two truths and one lie, and you have to guess the lie.” you told him.

“I know. I’m not stupid” he laughed.

This was a fun game to get to know each other, but Derek seemed to know you very well because you had already dated for a while now.

“I’ve broke my leg once during soccer practice. Sometimes I like to collect bugs and eat them. I have a super vision. What’s the lie?” you said.

The excitement was getting real. Both you and Derek were really competitive and sore losers when it came to competitions and games.

“Well…” he started.

“I’m not too sure about the bug thing, because after all you’re a slightly odd girl” he said “but something tells me you don’t have super vision, so I’ll go with that. That’s the lie” he continued.

“WRONG!” you shouted.

“Wait… Super vision? What? How? What?” he asked you with a really confused look on his face. 

At this point he was really confused, and you could just feel him thinking hard about this one.

“Well, yeah. I can see clearly in the dark just like you!” you said excitingly.

“What the hell are you talking about?” he stood up and asked.

“My friends like to blow dog whistles around me because I’m the only one that can hear it” you told him.

“Uhm…”

“Also, my friends sometimes tell me my eyes glow in the dark!” you continued.

Only animals’ eyes are supposed to glow at night…” he said with a puzzled look on his face.

“What if I told you I was an animal?” you said.

Betty and Mildred

Summary:  Something’s not right at Oak Park Retirement Home.

Author:  Dean’s Dirty Little Secret

Characters:  Betty White, Mildred Baker, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester

Word Count:  1869

Warnings:  None, just extreme sassiness

Author’s Note:  This stemmed from a conversation with @mamapeterson about needing Betty White on an episode of Supernatural. I thought she’d make a great companion for Mildred (from episode 11.11). I apologize if I tagged you and you think this is too silly to be tagged in - feel free not to read.

Originally posted by hunterchesters

Keep reading

so I’m hopefully gonna FINALLY update the uprising fic (wow it’s been like….2 months geez) this week but I’m posting some favorite bits today just as a thank you for all your patience (translation: because i feel like it). Here’s an admittedly silly snippet of Pearl and Greg’s mostly-serious Epic Heart to Heart About Where They Stand.

“Well, now that’s out in the open, is there anything else we need to clear up? I mean, as long as we’re stuck in this place.”

“I mean, probably. I’ve got things.”

“Yeah. I’ve got things too.”

“Yes. Well. Alright then.” Pearl takes a deep breath. “If Rose had been—”

“Do you have ears?”

“Excuse me?”

“I just—I’ve wondered for years…I always felt like it wasn’t polite to ask but man, I gotta know. It’s been bugging me forever.”

“You really never asked Rose?”

“I don’t know, there was just never a good time.”

She raises her eyebrows. “You knew her for about…fifteen years?”

“Can you just answer the question? All I need is a yes or no.”

“Oh alright, if it’s so pressing—no, I don’t have ears.”

“No kidding! So what do you hear with? Eyes? Gem? What?”

“Gem, it’s—all our senses are in our gems. They just transmit to our eyes and stuff. It’s sort of like your nervous system I guess, except incorporeal and resonance-based and nothing like that at all, really.”

“Can I see?”

“See what? My absence of ear? It’s hard since I can’t take the hat off.”

“Show me sometime when we get back to earth. I’ll remind you. Gosh, all this time and you didn’t have ears. That’s amazing.”

“I’m a lot more amazed that you knew Rose for a comfortable eighth of your life span and never got around to…you know…moving…her hair…”

“I mean, there was so much of it. It was kind of overwhelming.”

Pearl frowns but also nods. “Yeah, okay. That’s…that’s fair.”

3

Eeeyup. Princess of silliness.

[Well if we use “ponies” and “boobs” in the same sentence that would technically means we are talking “crotch-boobs” and we don’t want to go that way… fortunately I know what you mean, and the answer is nope, the royal puppies are off the charts. Pinkie’s tatas are that big because all the sugar she eats goes up there (some goes to her hips too but mostly to her knockers)

Tadmod dude, you have no idea how much that made me laugh… and now that I’ve the song stuck on my head I’m eagerly awaiting for the rest of the lyrics. Don’t let me hanging compadre! :3

PS. “A” stand for “almost boobs” and “G” for “gravity field" 

- The more you know ~⋆ ]

The morning of The Day of Triumph! The end of a mildly hellish week (which was preceded by a really hellish week). At the beginning I wasn’t doing  too hot, but I managed to get my spirits up! I procrastinated, and then beat myself up about it. And then I felt bad about the quality of work I did do, and beat myself up about it. I got stuck on a paper and, yes, you guessed it, I beat myself up about it! But now I’ve gotten some positive feedback from my teachers, and I wound up finishing that silly ethics paper a week ahead of time! I also had finished another paper (due today) that most of my classmates stayed up half the night to do (while I slept like a baby). All in all things are looking up! Stay positive guys, and if you forget, remember that it’s possible to get back!

~Cap’n Queer

ps. Also I’m getting a haircut tomorrow so that’ll be a nice pick-me-up!!

7

Aside from being amusing (I know that’s the only point of any of it but hear me out anyway) this kind of bothered me too because you saw them melt the plastic pellets that make the balls and then the balls all come out the same without their colors, and the only thing the factory does to them is color them differently? How do they get their special properties then?? 

Meowth got stuck in a completed looking Luxury Ball for a minute and it made him feel luxurious but how is that property added if they’re all just the same thing besides color??