you are so dumb i'm cry

DN Characters as Things my Friends and I Have Said
  • L: There's a special place in hell reserved for you and I'LL SEE YOU THERE
  • Light: Oh hey you know what time it is? *shows me his watch over which he taped a scrap of paper reading TIME TO DIE*
  • Near: I just want to go back to kindergarten were all you have to do is play with toys and clap in a certain pattern life is haaaaard
  • Matt: *turns to me* you know what? just fucking fill me with bull- *sees teacher* balloons! Fill me with balloons! so I can float into the stratosphere and die
  • Mello: hey what'd you get on the test- ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME
  • Misa: The art teacher tried to tell me black isn't a primary color, but then why do they say other colors are the new black? Doesn't that make it first??
  • Ryuk: Who needs free will and the ability to make your own choices when you can have APPLES?
  • Rem: my existence is a void.
  • Beyond: *hears police sirens* FUCK
  • Naomi: who needs boys? In fact who needs people? Why do people even exist, and where's that asteroid when you need it?
  • Mikami: *literally crying* and he just THREW out his paper in the trash. The FUCKING TRASH. WHAT KIND OF HEATHEN DOESNT EVEN RECYCLE?!?
  • Kiyomi: *imitating overheard conversation* And then she like told me my hair looked dumb and I was like but bitch you're always dumb, whaddup??
  • Matsuda: *walks into exam 15 minutes late* ALRIGHT LETS DO THIS *snaps pencil*

kidsxuisine  asked:

Some of my family laughs at me when I mention being upset due to the death of my dog, Socks. He died last month and I still cry every night, because he actually helped me through depression and anxiety, and he was like my best friend. I'm kind of questioning whether or not my sadness is justified. They say 'it's just a dumb dog'. Have you ever lost a pet, and if so, do you feel the same way?

OK, so I don’t want to say your family members are being total shits, buuuuut … well, let me tell you a story.

I am 32 years old. I still think about my first cat, Pansy, who I got in third grade after earning S’s for Satisfactory six weeks in a row on my handwriting. She was the most wonderful cat — a big, beautiful Maine Coon with a quiet “Plrrrrp!” sound that she would always greet you with. She liked to follow me around the house, let me carry her like a baby and was, everyone in the family agreed, the best cat that ever existed. My mom called her “The Little Furry Goddess” because she was always so serene and happy. 

She died when I was in 8th grade; we suspected, though could never prove, that the kid next door killed her. At the time, I was undergoing constant bullying in school, with no friends. I sobbed relentlessly. When we gave her a funeral in the backyard, I saw my dad wipe away tears, something I’ve only witnessed one time in the two decades since. 

Yes, she was just a cat. She cost maybe $10 at the pound. She weighed 15 pounds and had a brain the size of a walnut*. Those things are true, but so are these: She was my best friend. She was one of the only good things in that shitty, shitty time in my life. She has been dead 20 years and I can still feel so sad and miss her. Because she was fucking great. Because she brought me so much joy and comfort when I really needed it. Because I spent more time with her than with any human.

And now, I’m a grown-ass woman and I still love that cat who was only part of my life for four years. But in the intervening years, I’ve had other cats, and now Eleanor. Marigny and Eleanor in particular have brought me so much joy and happiness. I refuse to believe that either of them are mortal.

Which is a very, very longwinded way of saying that you never, ever need to feel dumb for being sad over a pet. I think they’re little lumps of God that live with us. They make things better. I hope you feel better soon, too.

So you like those anime pirates

I was looking through someone’s blog to try and find the one piece ask meme they reblogged, but it was too far back and i’m impatient so i just made my own ‘cause i’m a literal trash can. so have these one piece asks in no particular order

copy/paste these emojis into the ask box of your local resident of anime pirate hell and watch them slowly disintegrate as they’re forced to choose between things they love. fun for the whole family

⛵️ - Fave pirate ship? (like boat ship)
🔫 - Fave canon arc?
🚽 - Least favorite canon arc?
💩 - Least favorite character? (in general)
🙅 - Least favorite Straw Hat?
😀 - Most favorite Straw Hat?
😍 - OTP?
💀 - NOTP?
🙇 - A headcanon about <insert character>
☠ - Fave pirate symbol?
🏰 - Fave marine?
❌ - Least fave marine?
👾 - Fave villain?
🎾 - Fave battle?
😭 - Saddest scene?
😆 - Funniest scene?
😜 - Funniest character?
😳 - Any crushes?
👌 - Fave character design?
🃏 - Who has the Best Hat? (the true question)
🖍 - Fave filler arc?
🗡 - Least fave filler arc?
🆚 - Sub or dub?
☯️ - Anime or manga?
⏰ - How long have you been into One Piece?
🍎 - Fave Devil Fruit power?
🍏 - Would you eat a Devil Fruit if you had the chance to?
🐼 - Fave side character?
☔️ - Scene that made you cry the most? (not necessarily the saddest scene)
🌧 - Saddest backstory?
😎 - Funniest joke?
😱 - Most attractive character?
😐 - Most annoying character?
😕 - Scariest character?
👍 - Most powerful Devil Fruit power?
🗣 - Got any theories for how it’s all gonna end?
👏 - Fave techniques of <insert character>
🙏 - Favorite episode?
😏 - Favorite scene?
👂 - Favorite quote?
🙌 - Are you up to date?
❓ - What unanswered questions do you have related to One Piece?
▶️ - Fave opening?
🔙 Least fave opening?
👀 - Fave eyecatcher?
🏝 - Fave country/island visited?
🎆 - Something you can’t wait for??!!
🔝 - “One Piece is better than <insert something else you also like>”
🔍 - What do you think the One Piece is?
🔪 - A character who fills you with frustration?
💓 - Which character do you relate to the most?
™️ - How has One Piece changed you?

have fun answering these dumb questions and feel free to add your own if your heart so desires


listen. sometimes it’s going to be so hard you’re going to come home, cry, and question your entire being. you’re going to let yourself down. it’s going to feel absolutely crushing.

and then time will move it all under the carpet. you’re going to drink some water, get more sleep. you’ll pet a dog and laugh at a dumb joke your friend tell you. these small moments will be your saviour. catch them in the palm of your hands and hold them like the most precious thing you own.

just give it some time, my love. give it a little bit more time.

MELANIE MARTINEZ LYRICS RP STARTERS
  • "You've seem to replace your brain with your heart"
  • "Everyone thinks that we're perfect"
  • "Smile for the picture"
  • "Go back to being plastic"
  • "Kids are still depressed when you dress them up"
  • "He doesn't think I'm that fucking dumb, does he?"
  • "You call that ass your own, we call that silicone"
  • "All the makeup in the world won't make you less insecure"
  • "It's all fun and games 'til somebody falls in love"
  • "You already bought a ticket and there's no turning back now"
  • "Mr. Houdini, you're a freakshow"
  • "You build me up like building blocks just so you can bring me down"
  • "Fuck your degree"
  • "You think you're smarter than me with all your bad poetry"
  • "Why do I always spill?"
  • "God, I wish I never spoke"
  • "I'm sick of all the games I have to play"
  • "I love when you call me fucking dumb for the stupid shit I do"
  • "It's not like I'm asking to be your wife!"
  • "It's my party and I'll cry if I want to!"
  • "I'll cry until the candles burn down this place"
  • "I'll cry until my pity party's in flames"
  • "He chased me and he wouldn't stop!"
  • "Tag, you're it!"
  • "I'm fucking crazy"
  • "Do you like my cookies? They're made just for you"
  • "A little pit of sugar and lots of poison, too!"
  • "Honey, do you want me now?"
  • "Someone told me 'stay away from things that aren't yours' but was he yours if he wanted me so bad?"
  • "Pacify her! She's getting on my nerves"
  • "You don't love her, stop lying with those words!"
  • "Loving her seems tiring"
  • "Don't be dramatic, it's only some plastic"
  • "No one will love you if you're unattractive!"
  • "Is it true that pain is beauty?"
  • "Will a pretty face make it better?"
  • "Do you swear you'll stay forever?"
  • "Baby soft skin turns into leather"
  • "We paint white roses red, each shade from a different person's head"
  • "This dream is a killer!"
  • "I really hate being safe"
  • "The normals, they make me afraid"
  • "The crazies, they make me feel sane"
  • "I'm not! Baby, I'm mad!"
  • "So what if I'm crazy? The best people are!"
  • "Tell the psychiatrist something is wrong"
  • "You like me best when I'm off my rocker"
  • "All the best people are crazy"
  • what she says: i'm fine
  • what she means: i'm so sad powerless got canceled. the show was diverse. it was funny. the cast was all so talented. the jokes didn't dumb themselves down for you. the show never laughed at the audience but always wanted you to laugh with them. it was uplifting and not mean spirited. it's the kind of tv show you crave in a world where - especially shows based in a superhero setting - are always so dark. and it was canceled.
LISTEN UP READ THIS MOTHERFUCKERS

IVE BEEN PINING AFTER MY BEST FRIEND AND I WAS TOO SCARED TO SAY ANYTHING.

AND SHES GONE AND GOT MORE BALLS THAN ME CAUSE SHE TOLD ME SHE LOVES ME!

(Turns out we accidentally fell into the “we’re both gay but think the other is straight so we’re just pining now” trope without even realizing it cause we’re dumb)

WELL I LOVE HER AND NOW SHES AGREED TO DATE MY DORKY ASS AND IM SO LUCKY AND ITS DURING PRIDE MONTH AND EVERYTHING AND NOW WERE JUST TWO ACE GIRLFRIENDS AND MY SKIN IS CLEAR AND IM SO HAPPY IM CRYING HAPPY FUCKING PRIDE MONTH YALL

  • Papyrus: Sans, can I share something with you from earlier today?
  • Sans: What is it, Pap?
  • Papyrus: Well, I sent you a text early in the morning. Because I have to go out of town for one weekend.
  • Sans: Yeah.
  • Papyrus: So I said "do you have any preference whether I go this weekend or next?"
  • Sans: Yeah?
  • Papyrus: Your response.
  • Papyrus: At 9:30 in the morning.
  • Papyrus: "motherfucking Jesse Eisenberg JESUS Christ fuck dude mother fucking Facebook movie bullshit JESUS can you fucking believe this shit".
  • Papyrus: No punctuation.
  • Papyrus: Random capitalization.
  • Sans: *laughing hysterically*
  • Papyrus: So I respond "I have no idea what we're talking about right now".
  • Papyrus: 45 minutes pass, I get a text from you.
  • Papyrus: "God damn created Facebook then fucking lawyers and shit right fucking winkle boss twins God damn rowing the boat God damn this shit I can’t even fucking believe this shit have you seen this shit fuck I just watched this shit fuck Jesse Eisenberg man"
  • Sans: *now crying from laughing so hard*
  • Papyrus: I respond "Sans, you're scaring me". An hour passes.
  • Papyrus: You respond " motherfucking Spider-Man Spider-Man you put in the time fuck put in the time motherfucking build shit with his bare hands fucking best friend shit Jesse Eisenberg"
  • Papyrus: "i'm very tired"
  • Papyrus: I just said "No problem, I'll tell your dumb jokes for you today".
  • Papyrus: IMMEDIATE response, like five seconds later, "no man I’ll just talk about the facebook movie all day shit man you must be so interested in the shit I have to say about the Facebook movie fuck dude I just watched the year and a half ago fuck Jesse Eisenberg man man he fucked over Spider-Man and crazy winkleboss twins rowing"
  • Papyrus: "Trent resin or did the soundtrack fuck this guy who invented facebook I don’t like dying I can’t think of who the fuck invented Facebook all I can think is the guy who played the guy who invented Facebook who the fuck invented Facebook"
  • Sans: *rolling on the floor dying of laughter*
  • Papyrus: And then, in all capital letters, two hours later,
  • Papyrus: "MARK ZUCKERBERG"
Seventeen's world tour announcement
  • Me: oh! Seventeen are having a comeback in May. Better save up $50 to buy albums!! :) 💕
  • Pledis: no you dumb bitch you better get another damn job because seventeen is coming to a city near you to preform and slay your soul and if you miss them now you will cry for the rest of your miserable obsessed life so you better start scraping up pocket change right now you fucking IDIOT!!

anonymous asked:

Fuck I'm literally crying bc I was looking through your au story and the posts and shit and I saw the one about Lee bursting into tears bc he grabbed a fry with hesitation and it made me so emotional bc I'm recovering from an ed too and not I'm just sitting here sobbing bc holy shit I love him outside this au and now it in its like I love him and now look up to him?? Idk I can't word shit rn and that sounds really dumb and nerdy but just thank you for that 💕 its just an oc Ik but it means a lot

This. THIS is why I’m doing this. THIS is why I’m going out of my comfort zone to talk about mental illness of all kinds. For you. For anyone like you.
I almost feel like I should be the one thanking you. Actually, I’m gonna do it anyway. THANK YOU.

9

A dog has no use for fancy cars, big homes, or designer clothes. A water log stick will do just fine. A dog doesn’t care if you’re rich or poor, clever or dull, smart or dumb. Give him your heart and he’ll give you his. How many people can you say that about? How many people can make you feel rare and pure and special? How many people can make you feel extraordinary?

The signs as Melanie Martinez songs
  • Aries: Play Date
  • - I don't want to play no games, I'm tired of always chasing, chasing after you -
  • Taurus: Teddy Bear
  • - You were comforting and quiet, How did love become so violent? -
  • Gemini: Mrs. Potato Head
  • - Don't be dramatic it's only some plastic, No one will love you if you're unattractive -
  • Cancer: Cry Baby
  • - You seem to replace your brain with your heart, You take things so hard, Then you fall apart -
  • Leo: Cake
  • - I'm not a piece of cake for you tu just discard -
  • Virgo: Alphabet boy
  • - Yout think you're smarter than me with all your bad poetry, fuck all you ABC's, alphabet Boy -
  • Libra: Sippy Cup
  • - How did you afford this ring that I love honey, just another shift at drug company, he doesn't think I'm that fucking dumb does he -
  • Scorpio: Mad Hatter
  • - Tell you a secret, I'm not alarmed, so what if I'm crazy? The best people are -
  • Sagittarius: Milk and Cookies
  • - Do you like my Cookies? They're made just for you. A Little bit of sugar and lots of poison too -
  • Capricorn: Carousel
  • - This horse is too slow, we're always this close, almost almost, we're a Freak Show -
  • Aquarius: Pacify her
  • - Someone told me stay away from things that aren't yours but was he yours if he wanted me so bad -
  • Pisces: Training Wheels
  • - Wanna make you mine but that's hard to say, is this coming off in a cheesy way -

I don’t know who bought me this but I’m honestly about to cry I just had my last day at my job yesterday and it was a really hard thing for me to do and just this couldn’t have come at a more perfect time and it’s dumb but I feel so hopeful and like everything will work out and be okay now. I really needed a good luck charm and I’m glad I have one that reminds me that people care about me

anonymous asked:

Do you have advices on how to deal with paranoia ? I'm having panic attacks and i can't stop crying because of dumb shit

I’m sorry it’s affecting you so badly, I do have advice!

You should take steps to address your paranoia. One way to begin is by addressing your foundations: your wellbeing and how you live your life. Keeping your lifestyle regulated helps in grounding.

・Eat nutritiously and take in lots of water. This seems simple but your diet holds a lot of influence over you, having the ability to up your energy, clear your thoughts, and pacify your moods.
・Try to get on a healthy sleeping schedule. Lack of sleep causes numerous problems and can intensify symptoms. I know insomnia is a big struggle, so here are some sleep skills:
1. When trying to go to sleep, turn off or dim lights before lying down.
2. Separate yourself from distractions that will keep your attention heightened. Turn off your computer, put your phone away, etc.
3. Set your day’s schedule so you’re doing activities that will tire you (ex: exercising) as the day goes on.
4. Alcohol, cigarettes, caffeine, and large meals before going to bed can make it harder to sleep, therefore it’s better to avoid them before you intend on sleeping.
5. Don’t stay on your bed constantly. Take your phone, computer, books, etc to other environments and begin associating your bed with sleeping.
6. Spend an hour before going to bed doing something calming like listening to relaxing music and drinking chamomile tea.
・Actively avoid unnecessary stressors. Distress is often linked with worsening symptoms.

Now for the thoughts themselves:
・Try to identify any triggers for your thoughts. Remember and analyze your past episodes while looking out for patterns. It’s useful to write this down so you have something concrete to keep adding to and looking back on. If you notice certain situations and states play a role, you can use this knowledge to protect and comfort yourself, by trying to avoid the trigger if possible and by having something to remember and compare to, thus helping to realize the paranoia.
・A great technique I’ve seen mentioned many times is to Assess Evidence. Write down the thought you’re having and under it make two lists, one detailing evidence for the thought and the other detailing evidence against the thought. By doing this, you challenge your line of thinking.
・Talk to a trusted friend, family member, professor/teacher, professional, etc about your thoughts. This can be useful in the moment or after. This can calm you down and rationalize what you’re dealing with.
・Don’t react right away to the thoughts. Pause and try to break it down, consider how it came about, what meaning are you giving to it, what’s the bigger picture, what are other ways of looking at the situation.
・Do activities that will soothe your senses and distract you. Draw, listen to music, play with a pet. Things like Weave Silk are good!

- Mod Alex
Sources: one, two, three