you are kidding right

10

My favorite tweets from today pt. 2 (sad that I have to make another one of these in the first place. First it was the bathrooms and now this.)

100 questions
  1. Is a kiss considered cheating?
  2. Have you ever faked orgasm?
  3. If you could have one superpower, what would it be?
  4. Do you think you are going to be rich in 7-8-9 years?
  5. Tell us some funny drunk story.
  6. Why are you no longer together with your ex?
  7. If you had to choose one way to die, what would it be?
  8. What are your current goals?
  9. Do you like someone?
  10. Who was the last person to disappoint you?
  11. Do you like your body?
  12. Can you keep a diet?
  13. If the whole world listened to you right now, what would you say?
  14. Do you work?
  15. If you could choose only one food to eat to the rest of your life, what would it be?
  16. Would you get a tattoo?
  17. Something you don’t mind spending all your money on?
  18. Can you drive?
  19. When was the last time someone told you you were beautiful?
  20. What was the last thing you cried for?
  21. Do you keep a journal?
  22. Is life fun?
  23. Is farting in front of people irrelevant?
  24. What’s your dream car?
  25. Are grades in school important?
  26. Describe your crush.
  27. What was the last book/movie that really impressed you?
  28. What was your last lie?
  29. Dumbest lie you ever told?
  30. Is crying in front of people embarrassing?
  31. Something you did and you are proud of?
  32. What’s your favourite cocktail?
  33. Something you are good at?
  34. Do you like small kids?
  35. How are you feeling right now?
  36. What would you name your daughter/son?
  37. What do you need to be happy?
  38. Is there some you want to punch in the face right now?
  39. What was the last gift you received?
  40. What was the last gift you gave?
  41. What was the last concert you went to?
  42. Favourite place to shop at?
  43. Who inspires you?
  44. How old were you when you first got drunk?
  45. How old were you when you first got high?
  46. How old were you when you first had sex?
  47. When was your first kiss?
  48. Something you want to do until the end of this year?
  49. Is there something in the past you wish you hadn’t done?
  50. Post a selfie.
  51. Who are you most comfortable around?
  52. Name one thing that terrifies you.
  53. What kind of books do you read?
  54. What would you tell your 12 year old self?
  55. What is your favourite flower?
  56. Any bad habits you have?
  57. What kind of people are you attracted to?
  58. What was the last thing you cried for?
  59. Is there something you don’t eat? Some food that truly disgust you?
  60. Are you in love?
  61. Something you find romantic?
  62. How long was your longest relationship?
  63. What are 3 things that irritate you about the same sex?
  64. What are 3 things that irritate you about the opposite sex?
  65. What are you saving money for?
  66. How would you describe your bad side?
  67. Are you actually a good person? Why?
  68. What are you living for?
  69. Have you ever done anything illegal?
  70. Do you like your body?
  71. Have you ever made someone feel bad about themselves intentionally?
  72. Ever sent nudes?
  73. Have you ever cheated on someone?
  74. Favourite candy?
  75. Is there a blog you visit every day, or almost every day? Tag it!
  76. Do you play any computer games? What is your favourite game?
  77. Favourite TV series?
  78. Are you religious? Does God exist?
  79. What was the last book you read? Did it impress you and why?
  80. What do you think about vegetarianism/veganism?
  81. How long have you been on Tumblr?
  82. Do you like Chineese food?
  83. McDonalds or Subway?
  84. Vodka or whiskey?
  85. Alcohol or drugs?
  86. Ever been out of your province/state/country?
  87. Meaning behind your blog name?
  88. What are you scared of?
  89. Last time you were insulted?
  90. Most traumatic experience ?
  91. Perfect date idea?
  92. Favourite app on your phone?
  93. What colour are the walls in your room?
  94. Do you watch Youtube? Who is your favourite youtuber?
  95. Share your favourite quote.
  96. What is the meaning of life?
  97. Do you like horror movies?
  98. Have you ever made your mum cry? What happened?
  99. Do you feel lucky or special in a way?
  100. Can you keep a secret?

‪me: I fucking hate pineapple on pizza ‬

‪Robert: you’re cool with pineapple on your pizza right? ‬

‪me: arE you KIDDING?? ITS THE GREATEST COMBINATION‬!!! 😩😩How can you not love pineapple on pizza??? Shit don’t even put slices on it put the whole god damn fruit on my pizza‬👌🏼👏🏼👏🏼🍍🍍

So, there’s this relatively new member of our team who’s a gossip fanatic, she’s always around chatting everyone up and then reporting the juicest news and hot details she’s given, which is a demeanour our main client is pretty bothered by, therefore she always makes sure to shut up and behave around them.

Two coworkers of mine, me, the Big Boss and our client were arranging and planning a few things, when she burst into the room, not noticing the BB and the Client, who were at that moment having coffe behind the door and she went “ooooh, you know what they say about Louis Tomlinson not actually being the father of his child? Looks like it’s true after all, even though it’s been ages!”

We didn’t have time to gesture to her, that my client appeared from behind the door all frowny and straight faced “yeah, the same ages it took you to dig this oh-so-shocking information up, with that quick, sharp rate of yours you’ll have to start working on the next campaign tomorrow morning if I want it out before 2036″.

Hey did y’all know I love Red vs Blue

“just… please, don’t take the kids. i’ll do a̲͇n̬͚y̬̩̝͇t͇͞h̘̼͖̪i̠͖̝̠̠ng̦͕̤̬͝ͅ.”

chase… the kids are alright. you, however… you’re a puppet.

a concept: mr. and mrs. lester have a bet on whether which of their sons will have kids first. every family get together, they attempt to go behind each other’s backs and hint at the concept of children with both sons and their partners, upping the ante each time until it becomes ridiculous and phil and martyn are forced to seriously consider the idea and boast about whose child(ren) will be superior, much to the barely concealed delight of their partners