you are all hating on this which i don't even understand

anonymous asked:

I love Kirishima. A lot. And I love your blog because it mainly focus on him. I love how he brightens the show and how great his character is. But the thing is I saw some of your posts shipping him with bakugo. I don't ship him with bakugo though. I like their friendship and all. I think it's the most beautiful progress I have seen in BNHA. Their dynamic pair is good. May I know why you ship them? And please don't hate me.

Reasons to Ship Bakushima

Since you already like their friendship and think they make a good dynamic pair, you probably have a good idea of why people like their relationship. There are a countless number of reasons to ship them and their relationship has so much going for them, so I feel like whatever answer I give won’t be enough. I’ll try my best to answer this. Maybe it’s best if I list some of the main reasons why I ship them. 

1. Kirishima is important to Bakugou’s character development. 

Early on, he encourages Bakugou to have friends and allies by being a friend and ally to Bakugou himself.

Kirishima does such a good job making himself a friend and equal to Bakugou that he becomes the only classmate Bakugou can accept being rescued by without hurting Bakugou’s pride. This is a huge step for Bakugou’s character development because it shows Bakugou can learn how to accept help from someone without his ego being bruised. 

The character development Kirishima gives Bakugou helps Bakugou become a better hero by encouraging Bakugou to be a nicer individual and to work with other people. 

2. Bakugou CARES about Kirishima. 

Usually Bakugou doesn’t give a crap if someone is sad. However, Bakugou has been shown multiple times trying to cheer Kirishima up when Kirishima is sad, which is something he hasn’t done for other classmates. Bakugou cares about someone besides himself, and the classmate Bakugou cares about the most is Kirishima. 

Bakugou doesn’t care about people like a hero should. As Bakugou learns to care about Kirishima, he can become capable of caring about other people, further showing how Kirishima helps Bakugou become a better hero.

3. Despite Kirishima admiring Bakugou and wanting to be his friend, Kirishima doesn’t let Bakugou walk all over him. 

He’ll tease Bakugou like any friend would, even if Bakugou doesn’t like it. 

And he doesn’t let Bakugou get away with shit. He understands Bakugou needs to improve his behavior and will call Bakugou out on his bad behavior. 

Kirishima won’t let Bakugou get away with not calling him by his name either. Kirishima not only wants Bakugou to be his friend, he also wants Bakugou to treat him with respect. Kirishima doesn’t want to be Bakugou’s minion. He wants to be his equal. 

4. This point goes without saying, but similar to how Bakugou cares about Kirishima, Kirishima REALLY cares about Bakugou. 

Kirishima is one of the people who is most worried for Bakugou when Class 1-A hears the villains are after Bakugou.

And despite the dangers for him and his classmates, Kirishima is willing to break the rules to rescue Bakugou because he is one of the students hurt most by Bakugou’s capture. 

Kirishima checks to see if Bakugou passed the hero license exam and is worried about Bakugou when he sees Bakugou doesn’t pass.

5. Bakugou respects Kirishima. 

Bakugou sees Kirishima as a useful ally because their Quirks work well together and is willing to accept Kirishima into his cavalry battle team as a result. Then during that cavalry battle, he listens to Kirishima when Kirishima tells Bakugou to calm down, and Bakugou even refers to Kirishima by his name, something Bakugou rarely does and only does with people he respects. 

Kirishima puts up a good fight against Bakugou during the Sports Festival, showing Bakugou that he’s more than just his hardening Quirk, making Bakugou respect him even more. 

Not only does Bakugou respect Kirishima enough to be rescued by him without hurting his pride, but Bakugou remembers words Kirishima told him months later. Kirishima told Bakugou he’d be unshakable during the cavalry battle, and then Bakugou recalls those exact words months later. Bakugou doesn’t remember things unless they’re important. The things Kirishima says have a huge impact on Bakugou.

Furthermore, Bakugou thinks Kirishima is so strong that he states Kirishima can be unbreakable like All Might. Considering how highly Bakugou thinks of All Might, that’s a huge compliment and shows how much Bakugou respects Kirishima’s abilities. 

6. Bakugou is good for Kirishima’s character growth. 

Kirishima looks up to Bakugou for his unwavering determination and strength and tries to be a strong hero more like Bakugou. When Kirishima expresses how little he thinks of his Quirk and abilities, Bakugou gives Kirishima advice and helps Kirishima create his new super move, Red Riot Unbreakable. 

As demonstrated by Red Riot Unbreakable, Bakugou helps give Kirishima conviction and a more unbreakable spirit, making Kirishima more of an unyielding wall, which will improve Kirishima’s hero career. Kirishima wouldn’t be the mighty brute force he is now without Bakugou. In addition, the things Bakugou says improve Kirishima’s confidence. For instance, Red Riot Unbreakable raised Kirishima’s confidence and makes him feel stronger, which is important for Kirishima’s self-esteem. Keep in mind, Bakugou usually says things to hurt and lower other people’s confidence, so it’s very remarkable that the things he says helps Kirishima’s confidence instead. 

Although, it’s difficult for Bakugou’s threats and insults to faze Kirishima anyway. 

Considering Kirishima’s low self-esteem, Bakugou is an important person who’ll help raise Kirishima’s confidence. In addition, both Bakugou and Kirishima suffer from painful inferiority complexes, with Bakugou’s inferiority complex manifesting into a superiority complex. They can both relate to their issues and help each other. 

Overall, Bakugou and Kirishima’s relationship gets lots of development throughout the series. They mean a lot to each other and help their characters grow. They’re arguably best friends. They’re so close that Iida automatically turns to Kirishima when asking about Bakugou’s whereabouts. 

I don’t expect this answer to convert you into a Bakushima shipper anon. It’s cool if you don’t ship it. This is a very loaded ask because there’s so much I can say about this. I don’t think this answer does this ship or their relationship justice because I can go on and on about why Bakugou and Kirishima are great for each other and why their relationship is important. If I didn’t list some reasons why I like them, then my answer would get disorganized and incoherent. By the way, thanks for asking this specific question. I’ve never really stated why I like Bakugou and Kirishima’s relationship, and it’s nice to finally get my thoughts out there. Although, I could still say more on the topic. 

annabethsowl  asked:

Hi ashlee! Sorry to bother you but I've seen you and a couple people blogging about my immortal and I was hoping you could explain what's going on? From what I understand we just found out who the author is? But I'm not familiar with the actual story of my immortal. At least I don't remember ever coming across it. Thanks in advance!

It’s this 44 chapters long Harry Potter fanfic that was written back in 2006-2007 by ‘Tara Gilesbie’, published on fanfiction.net, and it’s so atrocious it’s great. The main character is a vampire goth (or ‘goffik’) called Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way but sometimes her name is spelled Enoby, the spelling overall is terrible, the plot is nonsensical and weirdly sexual, the characters and world are completely bastardised and on top of that the author sprinkles notes about her preferences and life story throughout the actual chapters and in the author’s notes. It’s so ridiculous, you truly have to read at least the first chapter to get an idea of how weird it is. There’s references to Hot Topic, to self-harm, to characters constantly hooking up, Hogwarts is divided into Goths and Preps, Harry and Draco are exes and everyone’s names are constantly being misspelled… It’s truly a wild read. Buzzfeed did a pretty god job picking out some of the best bits for its ten year anniversary, if you can’t sit through the whole thing you definitely have to read this.

It so completely disregarded Harry Potter canon and was so hated at the time that it got thousands of negative reviews, which made it infamous, and the author’s notes got more aggressive in response to the feedback. It was hacked twice, and then the author ‘got bored’ of it, and then she got locked out of her account.

It got really famous because no one could decide if it was genuine or a parody. It was so terrible a lot of people thought it must have been satire, but it was so long and so bad that a lot of people also thought it couldn’t have been made up because of the effort that went into it. It was like an over exaggerated example of all the worst bits of emo internet culture in the early 2000s, and some people saw it as a brilliant commentary on the state of fandom while others saw it as a blight on people who were trying to get fanfiction to be taken seriously. The debate raged and My Immortal even became required reading for a course at Princeton, but the author managed to stay anonymous and one of the greatest mysteries of the internet.

Recently, an unrelated scandal occurred in the YA publishing world where an ‘author’ named Lani Sarem attempted to buy her way onto the top of the NYT Bestsellers List with a book so terrible it garnered comparisons to My Immortal. People started speculating (half joking, half serious?) that maybe she was the author, My Immortal had been completely serious, and she had never grown up or changed her writing style at all and was now trying to scam her way to a profit with it. 

This is obviously terrible, and it actually coincided with the real author of My Immortal making her first public statement on the internet in years, after she rediscovered and updated the bio of her fictionpress.net account, which had a similar account name, creation date (and apparently the same email and password) as the fanfiction.net account that had hosted My Immortal. After that first update she came back to say, no, she was not Lani Sarem. And then she came back again to reiterate that she was the real author of My Immortal, and, in the process, dropped hints that she had an agent, an editor, worked with amazing women in the publishing industry, and that she couldn’t say anything else about My Immortal ‘for now’.

Linking directly back to the Lani Sarem scandal, an editorial assistant at Wednesday Books made a (now deleted) tweet saying, “we have a book with the girl who wrote My Immortal. Definitely not the same person as this nut.” 

Someone took this information and began hunting for clues as to who this author could be. They came across mention of a book called Under the Same Stars by Rose Christo, being published by the pretty damn impressive publishing house Macmillan. Now, I’ve heard two different stories at this point: Both might be true, maybe they happened at the same time or maybe one after the other, I’m not sure. But I’ve heard that they then found Rose Christo on Twitter, and discovered a screenshot she’d posted of something else that had another tab with what appeared to be the fictionpress account open. The other thing I’ve heard is that someone found Rose on tumblr and searched through her blog for mentions of My Immortal, and found a post where she admitted (in a round about way) to being the author (because she didn’t want Ebony being called a TERF, as if this story wasn’t wild enough to begin with!!).

Either way, people were now undeniably linking Rose Christo with My Immortal. And it turns out they were right, and Rose was the author, and Under the Same Stars is actually a story that details the time of her life when she was in the New York foster system, searching for her younger brother and writing My Immortal (which was a troll fic, she has confirmed) with her foster sister, referred to throughout the fic as Raven. 

Here’s the official description of the book:

In the early 2000s, Rose Christo was separated from her five-year-old brother and shuttled between foster homes in Brooklyn to the Bronx and back again. Desperate to be reunited with her sibling, she traveled the five boroughs, unable to find any trace of him, as New York State’s child care agencies failed to help her time and again.

Then, with the help of one beloved foster sister, Rose created an infamous piece of Harry Potter fanfiction titled My Immortal, posting it online under the pseudonym XXXbloodyrists666XXX. The “44 chapters and 22,000 words of hysterical, typo-laden hyperbole” went viral as the most notoriously terrible fanfic ever read by the community. For years, fans, writers, and editors researched, debated, and contested the story’s origin and its mysterious author: Was this grammatically challenged rant actually written by a suicidal goth teenager named Tara Gilesbe living in Dubai, or was this a hoax perpetrated by a group of professional authors making fun of fanfiction?

The truth is a gripping, compelling, and surprisingly funny story of how a young girl infiltrated and used the fanfiction community to search for her brother by baiting their attention with a deliberately badly written tale, creating a 10-year mystery that garnered pop culture media attention and remained unsolved — until now.

Understandably, everyone lost their minds, because all the backstories people had hypothesised for the author of My Immortal were so far from Rose’s real life story (or the glimpses we’ve gotten of it so far). 

She had been hoping to remain anonymous until the publication of the book was properly announced, when it’s subtitle The search for my brother and the true story of My Immortal, would have whipped up this same internet frenzy. But the whole thing with Lani just caused people to go snooping and the news came out earlier than she had planned, which is actually quite frustrating and upsetting for her, I’d imagine. But she seems to be taking it in stride.

You can read her FAQ, where she answers a few questions about all this in her own words, and you can read about the other books she has published here. I also recommend checking out her blog in general for some great insight into issues effecting Native Americans. You can buy her books on Amazon, too, if you want to read any others before Under the Same Stars comes out.

Even though we all know who the author is now, My Immortal remains one of the greatest things to ever come out of the hell-time that was the early 2000s, and is like a time capsule of all the worst bits of internet culture back then. After following this mystery for a decade, I’m really, really glad to know that the author has done so well for herself.

Thoughts on the Mercy nerf from a Diamond Mercy main.

Here are some observations I’ve made from trying Mercy out with the rez cast time. The cast time of rez has several hidden effects to the Mercy gameplay - all of which make life for a Mercy player difficult.

1) Those two seconds spent casting rez are two seconds where I can’t heal my teammates. I now have to consider whether my teammates will survive for two seconds while I’m not healing them. If a teammate dies, but a lot of the team are at critical heath, I cannot afford to stop healing them to rez. This may result in a missed window of opportunity to rez that teammate. It makes no sense for me to rez a teammate only for another one to die immediately after - not worth it.

2) You can fumble a rez now. The current rez requires line of sight - this was not a big problem until rez also got a cast time. If I activate rez but then look away from my teammate (like if I’m getting ready to guardian angel away), the rez will finish casting and begin cooldown but my teammate won’t actually be revived. This means I have to stay looking in one direction for 2 seconds and take that extra time to turn around to get out of there afterwards. Aka - even more reason I’m extremely vulnerable while rezzing.

3) Heroes sometimes die - specifically the tanks. You know who’s supposed to be in the thick of the fight on the front lines? Tanks. You know who provides protection to a Mercy so she can successfully rez? Tanks. Basically if a tank dies, it is highly unlikely that I will be able to rez them without getting killed myself because a) they probably died in the front lines with no cover, and b) the dead tank is the one that’s supposed to give me cover to rez.

4) Say goodbye to King of the Hill maps! If there is a team fight happening on the capture point and one of my teammates dies, there is little to no chance of rezzing that teammate successfully unless I activate Valkyrie. There’s almost no cover on any of the capture points in koth, which makes that casting time excruciatingly long. 

5) Making Mercy stupidly vulnerable during rez is forcing me to revert back to the Old Ways of hiding. Mercy was originally reworked because people complained that Mercy players weren’t participating in team fights enough. With the introduction of the casting time for rez, I find myself playing it way more conservatively. I’ll hide if necessary. This is having the opposite effect of how Blizzard wanted Mercy players to play.

Overall opinion: For the first time in my 300+ hours on Mercy, Blizzard has successfully made me hate playing her. I have tried to be understanding and adaptable to all these changes she’s been seeing for the last few weeks. But this nerf has pushed me over the edge. It just doesn’t feel great to play her anymore - I loved playing Mercy because I love speed and fluidity with my movement and I love healing in general. But this nerf breaks Mercy’s rhythm completely. The fact that the stars have to align in order for me to do my job is ridiculous. Resurrection is Mercy’s defining ability - and they have made me feel the most vulnerable when I’m using that ability. This feels like a giant middle finger from Blizzard to Mercy players (or really just support players) - they didn’t take quality of life of the Mercy players into account at all. It’s not fun to play her. But that doesn’t matter because shitty dps players can at least hit me now that I move slower than the bots in the practice range.

Tower of Dawn

     So I think it’s time this fandom had a sit-down and talked some things out. Today’s topic: ableism. Before all of y’all start jumping on me and dismissing me and trying to say I have no right to talk about this, let me tell you a bit about myself.

     I was born with spina bifida. For those of you that don’t know that is, it’s when a baby’s spinal chord and nerves don’t develop properly. I had my first surgery to help this condition when I was eight days old. The excess amount of scar tissue in my lower back had begun to wrap around my spinal chord, which for obvious reasons is dangerous. I had the same surgery when I was four years old, and that’s when my life changed forever. I’d been able to walk before using a leg brace, but due to a mistake by the surgeon, my left leg was left paralyzed. I was a normal (and I hate using the word normal here, normal is an absolutely useless construct of society, but for lack of a better word at the moment, bear with me) kid, mobile and able to move around as I pleased, and then I couldn’t. I’ve been using a wheelchair since then. I’m not telling you guys this because I want pity. I don’t. I’ve accepted it as part of my life, and I love myself just the way I am. This little explanation is here so you guys can understand exactly where I’m coming from when you read the rest of this post. So with all this in mind, here goes my not-so-little rant.

     DISCLAIMER: I will be calling people out in this post and tagging them because I am done. 1000%, completely fucking done with this fandom. And if this causes a shitstorm, fuck it, because this needs to be said and this fandom needs to learn to stop being hypocritical pieces of crap.

     I love these books. I love Sarah’s writing in general,  and I would read literally anything she wrote. These books, Aelin’s story, Feyre’s story, are so important to me. I don’t have words to describe how much they mean to me. I love talking about them and healthy and constructive conversations about them. And some of the jokes that have been made  by the fandom are some of favorites. I’ve made some of them myself. I’ll joke alongside all of you about wingspans and gold nightgowns for as long as you want.

     I want to make something perfectly clear: this rant is in no way a reflection of my thoughts about her books. This post is exclusively about the fandom’s disgusting behavior.

     So let’s start with this post that I saw earlier.



     Disability is not kinky.

     For those of you that can’t understand that, let me repeat it.

     Disability is not kinky.

     DISABILITY. IS. NOT. KINKY.

     This whole post is horrifyingly ableist. And before you guys start claiming that “I have disabled relatives, I can’t be ableist!” (@rowan-stole-my-heart, I’m looking at you. Remember that conversation last year? Nice to know you’re still disgusting), that’s like saying “I have African-American friends, therefore I can’t be racist!”, which is such an inherently flawed line of arguing that it would require a whole other post to address, so I’ll just say don’t try it. I can’t even begin to fathom the mental process all of these people went through to think that this was even remotely acceptable in any way, shape, or form, so let me break this down and explain to you why this isn’t.

     This, my horrifyingly inconsiderate friends, is a form of fetishism. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, fetishism is the pathological displacement of erotic interest and satisfaction to a fetish. Now that you know what that is, let’s move on.

     This whole fandom has been complaining about a lack of diversity in Sarah’s books since I joined the fandom. Diversity doesn’t just mean POC, which is exactly what this fandom conveniently forgets. Diversity includes POC, people with mental illness, people with physical disability, LGBT+ people, and so much more. And when Sarah finally adds someone who embodies a slice of that diversity, you all have the gall to reduce his situation to sex jokes. All I can say is how dare you. How dare you reduce someone’s life and reality to a kink, to something to be made fun of, to something that spices up your dash and makes it NSFW just because you wanted to make fun of a book cover you probably weren’t satisfied with. In doing so you are insulting the thousands upon thousands of people that are in the same situation. You’re reducing them – reducing me – to a fantasy that you can use and then dismiss the next moment, without regard for anyone’s feelings. Do you have any idea how difficult of a topic sex is for people with disabilities? We are laughed at for wanting sex. Our anxiety when it comes to that is ten times that of any able-bodied person, simply because we don’t fit into the box that society wants to shove everyone into. And you’re making it that much worse because you have the audacity to think the fact that someone can’t move their legs is funny.

     It hurts. Reading that post hurt like hell. Because in your eyes – in society’s eyes – people like me aren’t human. We’re just something to ride, right? Yeah, I didn’t miss that little gem of a comment, @readinglikewildfire.

     And because I know this is coming, no, Chaol isn’t just a character.

     But you know what, I get it. It’s just sex, right? A small joke made, no harm done.

     Wrong.

     You’re perpetuating yet another harmful concept cooked up by a disgustingly ableist society. Sorry, but your privilege and utter ignorance are showing. I will concede a bit and agree that we can treat fiction for what it is – something that isn’t real – up to a certain point. But you guys just crossed a line. For those of you saying that you feel guilty for laughing, you absolutely fucking should, because this shit isn’t funny.

     The fact is if that post had been making fun of race or mental illness, then the fandom would have ripped these people to shreds and they would have been reported many, many times over. But it’s not, and instead I can count on my fingers the number of people that stood up to say this was wrong, because it’s just another wheelchair joke, right? Who cares? To those that did, I thank you from the bottom of my heart, especially @throne-of-omg-the-feels and @midnight-wonder.​ It’s nice to know there’s still some hope for humanity left. And to @nerdperson524, I agree with you. People do need a laugh, even those that live their lives stuck in chairs. But that post? It’s downright offensive.

     So that’s it. I’m done blowing things out of proportion, as some of you will say. If you think I should have approached you privately and messaged you about this instead of publicly calling you out, then maybe, just maybe, you shouldn’t have PUBLICLY insulted mocked degraded an entire subset of the human population. And maybe that makes me a bad person. It certainly means I’m not being the bigger person. And I could honestly care less. I am tired. So sick and tired of constantly being the bigger person, of just staying quiet when I see things like this because what’s the use? The entire world is filled with this shit and it’s not like I can fight every time I see this kind of injustice. Nothing’s going to change, no matter what I do. But this? This is where I draw the line. Congratulations.


@crochanblackbeak @feysandsmut @the-bookish-soul @rowan-buzzard-whitethorn @abraxoswyvernnn @carrion-princess

The Types and Their Level of Scariness
  • <p> <b>INTJ:</b> At first they might seem worrisome because of their intense stare and nihilistic sentiments, but all it takes is one harsh critique about something important to them and they'll crumble. Their bark is infinitely worse than their bite. Will write a series of salty "blind item" blog entries about you for months. 6/10; too passive-aggressive to be truly scary.<p/><b>INFJ:</b> Hard to get to know, but when they like you, they REALLY like you and you'd better not do anything to break their trust because all of those warm, fuzzy feelings will 180 into pure end-times-level wrath. If you've ever encountered an angry INFJ, you've seen the face of the devil himself. 10/10; scary af<p/><b>ENTJ:</b> While they're capable of verbally disemboweling someone they dislike, they won't actually come after you unless they're bored and feel like starting drama for shits and giggles. Threw a punch once and didn't like it too much. Will tell you to go choke on a bag of dicks with the biggest, brightest smile on their face. 6/10; scary only in theory<p/><b>ENFJ:</b> They love you so, SO much and they want you to do your absolute BEST at EVERYTHING you EVER do like REALLY really, so when you don't meet their expectations, they will get more and more assertive about you achieving your dreams (read: their dreams) until they eventually snap and stab you to death in your sleep. 9/10; file a restraining order and you might be okay.<p/><b>INTP:</b> Too lazy to truly get mad about anything. The only really scary thing about INTPs is their complete disregard for cleanliness. You'll find Chinese takeout boxes from six months ago covered in maggots by their bed, but you won't find nary a discouraging word coming out of their mouths. Only does damage to living things in RPGs. 2/10; scary hygiene but harmless.<p/><b>INFP:</b> Is someone who spends a lot of time writing poetry, getting drunk and crying hysterically about things that happened ten years ago really that scary? I mean, they'll probably throw a whiskey glass or a vase in your general direction and curse you out for a solid ten minutes, but then they'll go right back to crying in fetal position. 4/10; just walk away, dude.<p/><b>ENTP:</b> They'll fuck with you just for the sake of having something to do that day. They'll fuck with you sometimes for no reason whatsoever. They fuck with people because it's just in their nature. Occasionally they'll take things too far and you'll wind up in the hospital but probably never in a morgue. Might send you flowers during your hospital stay. 8/10; scary neurotic<p/><b>ENFP:</b> They're either your best friend or your worst enemy and there is literally no in-between. Sometimes they'll get mad at you for reasons you don't even understand. Rarely ever will they try to physically harm you, though. They'll just whine about "fake people" in their DeviantART journal and mope about for a long time before randomly deciding you're their friend again. 4/10; Super confusing but not scary.<p/><b>ISTJ:</b> The embodiment of "walk softly and carry a big stick". Will sit outside of your bedroom window for days with a shotgun, ready for you to make a wrong move so they can blow you to smithereens. Don't try calling the police, because they're probably a police officer or at least connected to one in some way. In other words, you're fucked. 10/10; lawful evil personified.<p/><b>ISFJ:</b> They love you with all their hearts but they also hate the things you do, ie "love the sin, hate the sinner". Usually harmless, but some of them quickly lose their shit when double-crossed. Might mix poison in your sweet tea and then bury you underneath a bed of roses in the backyard. Prays for your certainly-damned soul every night before supper. 7/10, only scary when provoked.<p/><b>ESTJ:</b> Their big mouths and intense, confrontational attitudes can put the fear of God into you, but for an ESTJ to truly be scary, they'd have to physically harm you and they don't want to jeopardize their careers over something that foolish. Will judge you hardcore from afar but that's about it. 5/10; talks shit but you won't get hit.<p/><b>ESFJ:</b> They're the undisputed champions of guilt-trips, and they'll guilt-trip you over things so incessantly that you might suffer a loss of self-worth in the process, which could lead to severe depression and no will to live. Will attend your post-suicide funeral in a really expensive dress and tell mourners how you could have "really been something". 6/10; scary shady<p/><b>ISTP:</b> No chill towards people they dislike. They will straight-up brutalize your ass in one-on-one combat and you will lose. Will put you in the hospital, wait until you've been released, and THEN put you in a morgue. Probably will laugh about killing you over cold ones with the boys for decades to come. 10/10; cold-blooded killers.<p/><b>ISFP:</b> There is no such thing as a scary ISFP. They might get hurt with you but they just let that shit go after a while. More likely to channel their negative feelings into an artistic outlet than something destructive. No time for pettiness or holding grudges. 0/10; anti-scary saviors<p/><b>ESTP:</b> Also has no chill towards people they dislike, but their hair-brained schemes at revenge are often poorly executed. Will threaten to "beat your ass" for months but won't actually do it unless they're drunk or high. Once they do get physically aggressive towards you though, you are deader than dead. 7/10; flee town before things escalate.<p/><b>ESFP:</b> Often incorrigibly shallow, they'll start rumors to sully the reputation of their enemies before they'd actually consider getting their hands dirty. Rarely ever starts fights but they sure do love jumping into other peoples' fights and finishing them. Will get one of their besties to film the entire beat-down and put it on Snapchat. Hair and makeup somehow stays flawless the entire time. 3/10; more petty than scary.<p/></p>

anonymous asked:

hey i kinda miss your old style. like without the metaphors. you had a good humor! you still do but i just don't see any of those anymore :/. will you make any more soon?

Something I’ve been thinking about.

Warning: Lots of text ahead. Putting it behind a “Keep reading” thing.

Keep reading

You know how sometimes we make meme and social media references in real life?

The aliens certainly didn’t.

The captain had no idea what to expect from his decision to bring a second human aboard the ship. His only guidance in the matter had been the rather unhelpful suggestion to acquire one already pack-bonded with Human-Megan. Unfortunately, given human nature, this could apply to any number of humans, and attempting to ask Human-Megan herself for an organized list of them all proved useless. (He had been immediately accused of being a “stalker”.)

However, he did eventually become aware of a certain human who had been a “sister from another mister” for most of Human-Megan’s life. Upon inquiring about this new human, he was met with enthusiastic approval, mostly in the form of the repeated, painfully high-pitched word “yes”.

And so Human-Lynn was brought aboard.

At first, the crew were presented with nothing they were unfamiliar with. There had been a temporary scare upon first viewing Human-Lynn, due to the vibrant and multicolored crop of hair she bore. However, Human-Lynn had quickly ended their confusion by explaining the concept of hair dye, which, although it had left a few crewmembers nauseous, was understandable for human standards.

In addition, Human-Lynn was considerably less emotional, or so it seemed. Upon encountering disagreements with the crew, she would begin laying down insults in an almost offhand manner, and nothing seemed to cause her to be visibly furious. However, Human-Megan had assured them that she was simply “sassy” and “sarcastic” in nature, and that when she began to insult them in such a calm manner, she was indeed furious (although it was difficult to imagine that a being could be simultaneously calm and furious).

But then came the strange, and often illogical, conversations that often ensued between Human-Lynn and Human-Megan.

For instance, there was their first passage through a nebula since Human-Lynn’s arrival. Human-Megan, although she had borne witness to nebulae before, looked on in wonder almost identical to Human-Lynn’s. Both were seemingly rendered immobile, mouths slightly agape.

“Gorgeous.”

“Yeah,” Human-Megan affirmed.

“What’s the…how does this even…” After a moment of failed articulation, Human-Lynn let out a deep sigh. “Science side of Tumblr?”

“Space dust do the glow-glow,” Human-Megan responded almost seamlessly.

“Thank you, science side of Tumblr.”

Several more occurrences of seemingly cryptic conversations where yet to come. Occasionally, the two would make eye contact and mutter “same” for seemingly no reason at all, and once during the first meal rotation Human-Lynn had stood and bellowed, “AND HIS NAME IS JOHN CENA!” much to the surprise and momentary panic of her fellow crewmembers.

At last, a member of the cultural research department approached the two during their third meal rotation and inquired about the nature of their seemingly meaningless conversations. It was his duty, after all, to collect data regarding new species, especially in regards to behavior.

He was met with general laughter, a sound still rather jarring to hear without appropriate warning.

“Holy…crap,” Human-Lynn breathed, wiping a tear from her eye as she shook with laughter. “An alien…wants to know…about memes. I never thought I’d see the day.”

“Memes…?”

“Yeah,” Human-Megan affirmed. “They’re like…I don’t know…references to popular culture on Earth? They’re usually pretty stupid, and either considered hilarious or grounds to murder someone because they’re that stupid.”

“Grounds to…murder someone?!”

“Not literally, dude. We’ve discussed this. Not literally.”

“There’s a lot of memes,” Human-Lynn continued in her friend’s place. “Spongebob is a few…oh, there’s the dog in the burning house. You know, the ‘this is fine’ meme?”

“Yeah, and Moon-Moon, and 'you shall not pass’–”

“John Cena–”

“Screw you, I hate John Cena–”

“These are not the droids you’re looking for, that one’s a classic–”

“And then there’s some that aren’t really memes, they’re more like Tumblr legends. Like the science side of Tumblr, and John Green, and Superwholock. But Lynn and I like to use those in real life because we’re weird.”

The researcher nodded, a gesture he had it adopted from the humans he studied, although the concepts they were referring to were far beyond his understanding. Perhaps this was one of those cases where you had to simply let humans be humans, regardless of how strange it was.

“I believe I have heard of these…memes,” he mused after a moment. “So…what is Rickrolling?”

Immediately the grins dropped from the humans’ faces.

“We don’t talk about Rickrolling,” hissed Human-Megan. “We never–EVER–discuss–Rickrolling.”

“Understood.”

I believe Spencer’s twin is coming.

In this post I want to give a list of reasons why Twincer is my prime suspect as AD. I know a lot of these ‘clues’ come from interviews, but they’re still really convincing for me at least. I’ve definitely missed some of the clues from within the show because they’re not as easy to spot - we need to know for sure if Twincer is happening, then we can dig further. (The fun won’t instantly stop once the finale airs.) But for now, enjoy these, and at the end, I give my theory as to the motive.

Please note: none of this is overly new. This is just the summation of everything we’ve been talking about on my blog for the past couple months. I wanted to put all the ideas into one post, rather than 31529 mini posts scattered here and there. I will be updating this as we find more. 

  1. The famous airport scene from 715.
    We all already think it’s weird that "Spencer" asked Ezra to not tell anyone he saw her there with Wren. What’s weirder, is the fact that Wren and “Spencer” were arguing. Amongst muffle, I heard Spencer say "stop calling me that" (let me know if you heard differently). Did Wren have a slip-of-the-tongue moment and call her Spencer rather than the twin’s real name?
  2. Dr. Cochran’s story is very telling.
    We all already know the ambiguous implication that Mary had more than two babies, because Dr. Cochran said he dealt with “two of Mary’s babies”. What’s more interesting is the second baby he dealt with. The first baby (Charlotte) he gave to Jessica. He said that the second baby that he delivered was placed in family county services. This could not have been Spencer, since Spencer was delivered to Veronica within 5 minutes of birth. So, who was that second baby that was placed in family services? I believe it was Spencer’s twin. Why? Dr Cochran referred to that second baby as “underweight but tenacious” - lo and behold, the next episode, Toby calls Spencer tenacious. This was the writers foreshadowing the similarities between this second baby, and Spencer. Twins. 
  3. We all know Hanna’s ‘dream’ in 701.
    It makes no sense that Hanna was able to dream ‘Spencer’ saying the name A.D. since Hanna was kidnapped before these initials were even revealed. Perhaps Hanna was visited by Twincer; the one holding her captive.
  4. A.D. needs to stand for something. 
    Spencer’s twin could literally have the initials A.D., since we know she would be Mary Drake’s child. Her first name would start with A and the D would stand for Drake. 
  5. Brendan and Ian both confessed to being confused by the identity of A.D.
    They needed the backstory to understand it. Is that because they had no idea who has the name “Alex Drake” (for example) ?
  6. Tyler said before 7B aired that “you’ve never met AD. You kind of have. You’ll know what I mean”.
    This can be interpreted in two ways: you’ve never met Twincer but since you know Spencer, you kind of know who AD is. Or. You’ve seen Twincer over the years, but thought it was Spencer. Either way, Tyler’s comment screams twin-theory to me. This could apply to any twin theory, but in this context, I’m using it for Spencer.
  7. Ian said (0:57) that “fans will be satisfied to a point. Right when it seems it’s gonna be really great, it might do a little [downwards hand motion]”….
    That cheeky smile on Ian’s face when he said “it seems it’s gonna be really great”… what could be greater than a liar being AD? Ian could be referring to the fact that they initially show us Troian under the hoodie, making us think Spencer is AD. Then, after commercial break, they will reveal it’s just her twin, hence the “it might do a little [downwards hand motion]”. We will be satisfied to a point, he said. It’ll start off amazing by thinking it’s Spencer, oh wait, it’s another twin.
  8. Ashley said (0:14) that she didn’t even know the A.D. reveal is possible.
    Because she did not expect a second pair of twins to come along?
  9. “It’s like there are two of you living in this house. You, and you’re evil twin, and we’re not sure who’s coming down to breakfast". 
    said Veronica to Spencer in 423. Foreshadowing at it’s finest.
  10. Spencer doesn’t remember this flashback.
    Was it her twin? And oh how coincidental, that the writers tell us a time Spencer doesn’t remember, in the same scene Veronica makes the above comment about Spencer’s “evil twin”.
  11. “Where are they?”
    said Mary as she entered the Hastings house (flashback from 717). Who is they? The twins? She proceeded to say that Spencer is the only good thing she’s ever made. Maybe Mary knows Spencer’s twin is evil, and is neglecting her. 
  12. “You look very much like your sister. Almost like twins”.
    said Mary to Spencer in 701. The writers wanted us to think that Mary was talking about Spencer and Melissa, since Mary was holding a picture of the half-sisters. But, were the writers, and therefore Mary, hinting towards Twincer? Is Mary being blackmailed/forced (by Peter?) to keep quiet on Twincer, and she had a slip-of-the-tongue moment here?
  13. Marlene is very aware of the Twincer theories.
    Back in 2014 she said that Troian sent her an online fan theory regarding Spencer having a twin who is A. Marlene was blown away by it and she thought it was a very well thought out plan with detailed evidence across the series. Watch from 1:35. Whilst you may be saying “there’s NO WAY Marlene spoilt her own show’s ending in an interview!!” - I feel like she had no idea the show would go on for 7 seasons, and once they got renewed, she panicked. “Shit, we need a new Uber A. Let’s go with that brilliant fan theory Troian sent me”. She probably regrets making this interview now. You can tell her passion for Twincer in this interview. She talks so damn highly of it.
  14. Marlene has said that the person who plays A.D. had known for a while.
    We know that Marlene told Troian the entire ending of the show years in advance. “Just like I had story time with Marlene, you all now get story time with Pretty Little Liars” said Troian.
  15. The girl in the coffin in the opening has the exact same black puffy shirt as Spencer.
  16. Why does it seem that A.D. is always going after the Hastings?
    Why shoot Spencer, out of all the liars? Why demand Aria to plant the audio device in the Hastings? Why not ruin the Marin household? The jealous twin wants her ungrateful sister dead, hence the shooting, and the jealous daughter is angry she never got adopted. Too much of the story is Hastings-oriented. 
  17. “They’re all some pretty. Good. Theories.”
    Was Janel’s response to being asked about the Spencer-twin theories. (22:20)
  18. And, I’ll just leave this here. Good one @prettylittlesessions​ !
  19. “Spencer’s” weird comments in 718.
    In 718 “Spencer” says to Toby “you know what its like to be the outsider. Removed from friends and family”. What made her say this? Nothing was said or done in 718 to prompt our Spencer to say this. 
  20. Keegan said there are no more Spoby kisses in 7B.
    “I can honestly say that there is not another Spoby kiss.” Yet - there was one in 718. Either Keegan lied, or that was Spencer’s twin. (10:15)
  21. “It’s somebody you have seen.”
    says Marlene in regards to who AD is. Was she talking about the Spoby kiss in 710, which Twincer referred to in 718 when she kissed Toby again? Marlene was very careful to avoid saying “it’s someone you KNOW”. We don't “know” Twincer. But, we have seen her.
  22. “That’s not the Spencer I know”
    said Toby in 718. Writers are foreshadowing.

Setting all this aside, I want to add my theory on the backstory and motive:

  • Twincer, who’s name is A_____ Drake, was born in Radley, as Dr. Cochran told us in 7A. 
  • Twincer was raised in Radley - not because she needed to be at a psychological hospital, but as a form of daycare, because Mary was deemed an unfit mother, and also she kept Twincer a secret from Peter… he already hated her (to the point of planning her murder, later on) enough for having one baby together, imagine Peter’s reaction to having twins.
  • There, Twincer met and bonded with her sister Charlotte. Charlotte became Twincer’s only friend. (Twincer might even be Bethany, since we already know of this bond between Bethany and Charlotte, and how Bethany was drawing Charles being taken away by a monster. But for this theory, let’s just forget Bethany for a second.)
  • When Mona came to Radley and started telling Charlotte about everything she did to her sister, Charlotte and Twincer wanted to play. They wanted a turn at harassing Spencer and her friends.
  • For Charlotte, as we know, it was the feeling of finally succeeding at something in life that made the game her drug. For Twincer, it was something far darker.
  • Harassing Aria, Hanna, Emily and Alison is all about driving a wedge between the girls. Twincer wants to break up the girls. Turn them against each other. Hopefully by throwing fire at the girls, they will break up, ultimately, to ruin Spencer’s life. Again, jealousy. Twincer’s plan is backfiring because it’s exactly A’s threats that makes Spencer say “we need each other more than ever” and “always stick together”. The writers keep making the point of SPENCER being the one to make the comments about “always” sticking together. Twincer cannot break Spencer and her bitches. This is fueling Twincer’s anger. Nothing is working.
  • That’s why AD/Twincer recently shot Spencer. “If I can’t break the girls up to ruin Spencer’s life, why not just become Spencer?” Twincer shot Spencer in an attempt to assume her identity and squeeze her way into the loving friendship group that she could never crack. “These girls are so loyal to each other… they don’t even break up after even my threats. Damn, I want to be a part of this. It’s my turn to live a happy life. You had your turn Spencer.”
  • Note: I do not believe that AD has been operating since season 1. Mona’s time as A is completely independent from Charlotte and Twincer’s story. Mona started the game, and now someone is ending it, and she wants to know who. Charlotte and Twincer are their own duo; their own A-team, which stemmed as a result of Mona coming to Radley. Charlotte revealed herself - next up in the A team is Twincer, who is carrying on the game she once played with her sister. 

There’s a post going around about pretty much how the marauders would be homophobic back in their hogwarts years and I want to put my opinion out there real quick 

okay. So… We’re talking about the 70s, there was indeed a lot of prejudice back then and it wasn’t easy to come out. 

With that said, we’re talking about four boys in which:

Boy #1 is a half-blood wizard and werewolf. Also not heterosexual. As any young person growing in a poorly informed environment regarding sexuality (let’s be real, I don’t think the school library would have a lot of books explaining puberty at all, maybe Troll’s Puberty For Dummies, but that isn’t really helpful) he would be scared and it would take time for him to come terms with who he is and who he loves, this taking in account older Remus as we know him. I have made a previous post about this matter, in which, in my HEADcanon I say that I think Lily would be the first person Remus would turn to only because in my HEADcanon they are really close friends and well, Remus needed a female touch in the matter But, ultimately, he would come out to his friends and everything would have worked alright because they all love each other and Remus, slowly but steady, also learns to love himself. Werewolf and all. 

Boy #2 is also a half-blood who gets to see what prejudice does in the muggle world and how it grows into hatred and violence all these nasty problems. As a eleven, twelve, thirteen, etc  year old, he doesn’t get why people would have these kinds of reactions towards people who don’t share the same romantic interests as themselves. He doesn’t get either why the colour of the skin is something of a big deal to muggles or why the purity of one’s blood is a big deal to wizards. Peter is a boy who watched the muggle and the wizard world grow in hate over matters that shouldn’t be problems and he would not question nor hate his friends over any of it because he doesn’t want to be like that. He’s very naive as child and that helps him in a path to acceptance rather than hate.

Boy #3 is a pure blood born and raised to be part of the wizard high society but with loving and understanding parents who didn’t blink twice over accepting his son’s best friend into their home to step in as the parents the boy didn’t have. The Potters raised James to be a good, understanding person. He was cocky, yes. But he was not a bad person, he was not a bigot. He helped the 1st years that were being bullied by the group of blood purists that were in Hogwarts at the same time as he was, and he didn’t even blink when one of his best friends told him he was a werewolf. James Potter believed in loyalty above all, he would have opened his arms towards his pan/bi/demi/ace/homo-sexual friends and even throw some playful jokes in about how he always knew Sirius liked to stare at his awesome arse. He would not turn his back to his friends for something as shallow as one’s sexuality.

Boy #4 is also a pure blood but from a very traditional family in every aspect of the word. Sirius Black grew in a toxic environment but he knew those weren’t the right ideals to have. He knew it and he fought against it to the point he had to run away from home. Sirius was a rebel and he knew what he was and was perfectly fine with it and he knew his friends would too because in them he found family, in his friends he found home.

Besides all this, don’t forget that the boys accepted Remus lycanthropy to the point they turned themselves into illegal animagi to be able to help his friend who every month would turn into a raging, murder-y, furry creature. If you think for one second that they accepted all that but had problems if any of them stuck their d*cks in arseh*les instead of v*gina, I don’t even know what else I can tell you

This is probably going to get hate, but I don't care. I believe this needed to be said about the TOG and ACOTAR fandoms.

Look–I’ve seen some things floating around Tumblr lately. And I’m going to be as realistic as I can here. Many won’t like my brutal honesty, but I don’t care at this point. I believe this needs to be said.

These said posts have been tagged anti-sarahjmaas, anti-tog (Throne of Glass), anti-acotar (A Court of Thorns and Roses) acomaf (A Court of Mist and Fury), acowar (A Court of Wings and Ruin), and the like.

But honestly, if you hate the thing, why the hell are you bothering to post about it–especially when it’s the whole book or series. I understand everyone’s going to like and dislike certain characters, ships, and plot points, but if it’s the whole, big scheme of things that you hate… Just don’t say it. Move on with your life and find books you actually like and obsess over those. Not ones you hate so you can ruin it for everyone else. I mean, seriously, who joins a fandom when they don’t like it? There’s the distinct prefix fan- which suggests you like it.

And don’t even get me started on when you say anti-sarahjmaas. You are literally saying you don’t support the person–not just the books. Do you even know how disrespectful that is? I don’t think you do, so I’m just gonna lay it out for you.

You wouldn’t say it to someone’s face that you’re anti-them. Think about it. You’re literally saying you despise and loathe, with every part of your being, that you hate everything about them. Their mind, soul, and body. Their religion, their sexuality, political standing, racial identity. And, if you would say it to them, you’re just awful. Hate to break it to you. Well, actually I don’t.

Basically, what I’m trying to get across to you, is to think about what you say. Yes, I know, a seemingly impossible task. Outrageous, right?

But WolfTheBookWorm, why would you ask us to think before we speak? You wail to the heavens.

Because you need to actually respect people, and if you don’t want to, just leave.

Also, I would like to add this: An author generally takes comments to heart, whether they’ll admit it or actually let it bring them down or not. I know–I am one, amateur or otherwise. You’re insulting their work–something they bleed, weep, laugh and cry over.

So just think for once–it isn’t that hard. And respect people–all people. Other fandomers. The author. Everyone.

*sighs* I’m glad I finally said it.

With that said, have a nice day, stop hating so much, and goodbye.

–WolfTheBookWorm

i have too many feelings about michelle jones so here have headcanons and peter x michelle

this was obnoxiously long because i have no control so lots of stuff is under the cut and it became very fic-like at the end there, whoops. 

one (THIS ONE!) | two | three | four | five | six | seven | eight | nine

  • so michelle moved with her family to new york when she started high school
  • and mj was actually pretty sad to leave her friends back in chicago because it had taken a long time to make those friends and she always feels awkward around new people
  • so she isn’t very happy about The Move
  • she comes from a loving family
  • like, she gets kissed every night before she goes to bed, her parents read her bedtime stories until she was ten, she used to wear matching outfits with her mother, family movie nights were every friday
  • her parents were really good to her for the most part and just loved and supported her
  • they’re also pretty smart and since mj has pretty much always been inspired by them so intelligence and the acquisition of knowledge is really important to her
  • hence reading and academic decathlon, but she’s also into math and science too because she’s very driven and doesn’t have that many friends in new york so what else is she gonna do?
  • and her parents are an interracial couple and they’ve encountered a lot of hate and mj was always so sad when she walked out with her mother and people would give them weird looks
  • so she’s tried to end hate whenever she can and fights to give a voice to those who are silenced
  • but now cue mj going to high school in new york
  • she joins academic decathlon ofc because who do you think she is she lives for this shit
  • and then! there is this little shithead on the team PETER PARKER
  • like who the fuck does this kid think he is
  • answering all these questions, acting like he’s sooo smart just because he happens to know a lot of facts and is really good at physics and speaks spanish really well and also happens to be really dorky and adorable and okay maybe he’s kind of attractive too and maybe mj starts throwing herself more into academic decathlon and possible CONSIDERS joining band but that’s ONLY BECAUSE PETER IS A SHITHEAD AND SHE NEEDS TO SHOW HIM HE ISN’T THE ONLY TALENTED ONE OKAY
  • anyway

Keep reading

*cracks knuckles* Okay, so we’re doing this.

Let’s talk about Sherlock North.

Sherlock North is a new Holmesian adaptation that was announced yesterday.  It is described as a contemporary crime fiction series, taking place in Finland during Holmes’ Hiatus.  While on the run, he ends up solving some cases in a small town with the help of someone named Johanna Watson.

In the space of twenty-four hours, the tag is FULL of people saying it’s going to be awful, that it’s homophobic and engaging in ‘het-swapping’, that Watson being a woman is boring and overdone, etcetera etcetera.  The entire tag is full of this.  Twenty-four hours old, not even close to being filmed or produced, and the tag is full of people decrying it as bad.

I mean, we know NOTHING about this adaptation.  There’s a Holmes, there’s a Watson, takes place during the Hiatus, that’s it. Boom.  What the hell is there to hate yet?

Those of us who are veteran Elementary fans are familiar with this, of course.  We’ve lived through this before, and still live through it because people continually fail to understand that if you’re ragging on something, you should avoid landing it in the tag.  But let’s go ahead and address some of the things people are saying about Sherlock North.  Let’s take a look at the claims and see if they hold any water.

Because Watson is a woman, it means that Holmes/Watson won’t be a homosexual pairing; that’s homophobic.

Come here.  Sit down.  I’m going to hold your hand through this, because this is going to hurt.

Holmes and Watson aren’t a canon gay pairing.

I wanted to say it quickly, like ripping a bandaid off.  It’s going to hurt, it’s going to sting, but it also needed to be done.  The truth of the matter is that Sherlock Holmes and John Watson, in the original canon, aren’t a homosexual pairing.  Now, we can certainly talk about how we interpret the text (I am a lifelong Holmes/Watson shipper; I will go down with that ship), and subtext, and coding, and all of these things, but the fact of the matter is that, in canon, Holmes and Watson are never actually written as romantically together.  Again, in terms of subtext and the way we interpret it?  Absolutely, it is easy to see them as being in love and so married and all.  But it isn’t canon.  It’s all interpretation.

What this means is that making Watson a woman is not, in itself, homophobic.  They are not ‘het-swapping’ because neither character was written as explicitly gay.  It’s just not possible.  No one is removing a real homosexual relationship from the story.

I know, it fucking sucks that it’s 2017 and we’ve never had a mainstream media Holmesian production with an explicitly queer Holmes or Watson, LET ALONE an explicitly queer Holmes and Watson that are in a relationship together.  I know that a lot of the people in the Sherlock North tag right now are angry, betrayed, bitter BBClock fans who thought that their show would make the subtext text, only to find that that didn’t happen.  And it sucks, I get that.  But that doesn’t make a totally different show homophobic.  And being hurt doesn’t excuse lashing out at a show and making unfounded accusations when, again, it was literally announced twenty-four hours ago and we know nothing about it.

If this is your argument against Sherlock North, how about you go watch some adaptations with queer characters?  How about The Adventures of Jamie Watson (and Sherlock Holmes), which is on youtube?  In that show Watson is bi, and Holmes is ace, and a number of the supporting cast also have LGBTQ identities.  Or S-her-lock, which can also be found on youtube.  Watson is trans and Holmes is an aro-ace.  I can recommend both of those adaptations wholeheartedly.

Watson as a woman is boring; a woman as the sidekick and help-meet, how original.

That’s primarily a matter of opinion, and you’re welcome to it, but I have to say, I’m offended on canon Watson’s behalf.  That’s all you think Watson is?  A sidekick? A help-meet?  I know Holmes calls him that in canon, but it’s also Holmes who claims that all emotion is useless and then tries not to cry when Watson gets shot.  I wouldn’t think of him as a reliable narrator, is all I’m saying.

And Watson as a sidekick is… I mean, I guess technically Watson COULD fit into that role, but that rather diminishes what a good Watson is.  A good Watson is brave, and loyal, and stubborn, prone to a temper at times, clever, a full partner in the investigations, compassionate and insightful, generous, self-sacrificing… what I’m saying here is, if you read the canon and just saw Watson as a sidekick, I suggest you go read it again.  And bring along the lenses that help you interpret the text as queer, because those lenses will definitely help you remember that narrators are often unreliable.

Watson as a woman is overdone.

Let’s see, in terms of mainstream media adaptations, I know of FIVE where Watson is a woman while Holmes is a man.  FIVE. They are:

They Might Be Giants (1971), with Joanne Woodward playing Mildred Watson; The Return of the World’s Greatest Detective (1976), with Jenny O’Hara playing Joan ‘Doc’ Watson; The Return of Sherlock Holmes (1986), with Margaret Colin playing Jane Watson; 1994 Baker Street (1993), with Debrah Farentino playing Amy Winslow; and Elementary (2012-), with Lucy Liu playing Joan Watson.

Five women Watsons. If we expanded the selection to include women Watsons against women Holmeses in mainstream media… we have six. That sixth one is Russian, btw. Not sure how mainstream it actually is, given that it doesn’t even have a Western world release.

If that’s your idea of overdone, I hate to break it to you about men Watsons and men Holmeses…

They only ever make Watson a woman so that Holmes and Watson can be in a romantic relationship together without having to incorporate a gay romance- THAT’S homophobic!

See point one regarding the homophobia.

But in the adaptations where Watson is a woman, IS there always a romantic relationship between Holmes and Watson?  Is this actually a thing?  This is a rhetorical question, I know the answer- no, they’re not always a romantic item when Watson is a woman.  In the most popular of the five adaptations above, They Might Be Giants, yes, Watson and Holmes are in a romantic relationship by the end.  The film is a cult classic, so I can see why it has imprinted on everyone’s mind, and why the heterosexual-appearing (bisexuality is a thing! As is pansexuality! As is asexuality! Not all of these are visible from the outside!) relationship between a woman Watson and man Holmes is something everyone remembers.

But in the other four? One can maybe argue sexual chemistry in some of them (it would take some arguing, though; it’s more subtext than text), but there is no actual romantic relationship between Holmes and Watson.  So if the creators of these productions made Watson a woman in order to have a romantic relationship with Holmes without queerness, they did a horrible job of it, because they forgot to actually include the romantic relationship.

(Fuck, those of us who watch Elementary just want Holmes and Watson to fucking HUG.)

Making Watson a woman isn’t progressive, it’s regressive; even if you get rid of the romantic relationship stuff, they often remove Watson’s key characteristics, like Watson being a doctor, or Watson being in the military.

Every single woman Watson is a doctor of some form.  Some of them aren’t practicing doctors, it’s true; neither was canon Watson when we first meet him, and in the stories he doesn’t actually start practicing medicine again until after he marries Mary Morstan, which happened in ~1887/1888 (don’t get any Holmesian started about dates…).  1888 was a full seven years after he met Holmes.  So even canon Watson, while having a medical degree, was not a doctor when we first meet him.

As for the military stuff… look.  In the first place, in the US military, women couldn’t serve in combat until 2013.  For the UK, restrictions on women in combat weren’t lifted until 2016 (though they could serve as combat medics and join other, technically non-combat groups).  But in the second place, and more importantly, our canon Watson served in the imperialist, colonialist British military in the Victorian era, a deeply awful time when the military engaged in genocides.  England is somewhat ashamed of that heritage, at least on some level (not on enough levels, of course, and not enough to get them to knock it off even now, but that’s neither here nor there).  Why the fuck would we want Watson serving an imperialistic goal, especially if a show doesn’t have the time or resources or, hell, interest to unpack what all of that means?  Very few shows can engage well in the complexities of military service, even ones ostensibly centered around them (*squints at NCIS*).  Frankly, I’d rather my Watson not serve in the military this time around if it means not having to deal with showrunners struggling and failing to make sense of the military mindset.

(ETA: Winslow was with the Red Cross during the Panama invasion. Thanks @sanguinarysanguinity!)

(Disclaimer: my entire family is military; believe me when I say this shit is complex, and needs a lot of energy devoted to it to do it right.)

The name fucking sucks.

Well.  I won’t argue with you there.

(Anybody know if this is just a translation of what the name is???  Because then I understand why it’s so bad.  Is it just a working title?)

The sum up

Take a look at all of those complaints I listed.  These are the complaints I saw over and over and over again when I went through the Sherlock North tag today.  Are you sensing a theme here?  Is there something in common with all of these arguments?

I want an explicitly queer Holmesian adaptation as much as the next H/W shipper.  I dream of it.  If someone gave me money to make my own adaptation, hells to the yeah would make them queer and in love.

But that doesn’t actually seem to be anyone’s main problem, to be honest.  The main problem people seem to have is that Watson is a woman.  

Someone can argue till they’re blue in the fact that the reason they’re upset about a woman Watson is because they want a gay Holmes and Watson relationship, but the fact of the matter is, we don’t have that relationship in any media, at all, and yet people still watch that media anyway.  And you can certainly be sad about the potential for a gay relationship being gone.  I do get that, and respect that.  

(Sidebar: in the world of things I find hilarious is the fact that, in this adaptation, Holmes and Watson COULD BE a gay couple!  They could be happily married!  Because John Watson could be back in London, sad because his husband was killed by Moriarty because THIS TAKES PLACE DURING THE HIATUS. Johanna might be a totally separate character!  Or Johanna IS our Watson, and Holmes didn’t know Watson before the Hiatus in this adaptation.  You know why that’s a possibility?  BECAUSE WE KNOW EXACTLY THREE THINGS ABOUT THIS ADAPTATION.)

But the hate?  That’s some bullshit right there.

If your issue is that Sherlock North is yet another adaptation where Holmes and Watson won’t be a gay couple, I do understand that disappointment. I would also like to point out that just because Holmes and Watson won’t be a gay couple in Sherlock North doesn’t preclude queerness, so you will want to rephrase that argument.  Watson could be a lesbian.  Holmes could be ace.  One or both could be bisexual.  Remember that queerness is this whole big range of things.  We don’t know enough about this production yet to say one way or another.  Just remember that two white dudes touching isn’t the only way to be queer, and that disappointment over the lack of white dudes touching shouldn’t lead to woman-bashing.

And if a woman Watson is your issue you don’t need to worry.  There are literally hundreds of other mainstream media adaptations with man Watsons.  In some of them, there are barely any women at all!  You can avoid women to your heart’s content.

Ultimately, most of the arguments against Sherlock North are just ridiculous.  It may suck.  It may be brilliant.  But it doesn’t have a cast, or a production crew, or any fucking funding yet, so we literally know not a single thing other than a general, broad concept.  So take a deep breath and step back.  Go hate women elsewhere.

(You know what I would like to see?  Some of this same outrage if Sherlock North ends up being a predominately white cast.  But if it has a white cast, suddenly we’ll hear all about how Scandanavia is just so white, it only makes sense for the cast to be white… and if folks got upset about race problems, they’d need to examine their own favourite Holmesian adaptations more critically, and we all know that ain’t gonna happen.  *sips tea*)

How them 2000s live actions kids shows be
  • Normal Girl: *internally* I'm just a normal high school girl. I suck at math. I hate my parents. When someone asks me about my opinion on complex socioeconomic issues, I just go "What the heck!?" and start "texting" or something like that. My life would be just like yours, except for one thing: I have an amazing power... I can talk to cetaceans!
  • *at the docks, a bell tolls as our normal protagonist hears the voices of cetaceans bubbling in her mind*
  • Normal Girl: *staring deeply into the ocean*
  • Best Friend: Ahoy! What're you doing?
  • Normal Girl: Just staring into the oceanic abyss, thinking about how much I hate my parents. *internally* I have to keep my ability to speak to cetaceans secret or else... uh...
  • Best Friend: Haha, I feel that, friend. What a colorful life we teens live, our seaside environment awakening a rumbling darkness within ourselves of which we mull on our own with nothing but the unbounding depths of the ocean as our one escape. An escape which serves to only maim our fragile egos with newfound adolescent anxieties.
  • Normal Girl: What are you even talking about?
  • Best Friend: I don't know. I haven't slept in a week. Let's go to the mall.
  • *at the mall*
  • Normal Girl: *internally* My town might as well be called Lamesville. Nothing ever happens here, but the mall can be pretty fun. It's only place in the whole town with anything in it that isn't fish or excessive amounts of woodlice.
  • Best Friend: ...So I'd just dance and I'd dance until my feet broke. When that happened, I'd just get up and dance on my broken feet. And I did this until they were raw and blood was everywhere. I kept waking up in the morning extremely exhausted after this dream. I decided to record myself one night and it turns out I was dancing in my sleep. I haven't slept since I saw that. *leans in close to the normal girl* I'm afraid of what I'll do in my sleep.
  • Normal Girl: Wow, sounds weird... I guess. *sips coffee*
  • Best Friend: OMIGAWD! It's Chad Alphakid. He's coming this way!
  • *the normal girl and her best friend squee*
  • Normal Girl: *externally* That's Chad Alphakid. Who is he? He's only the hottest most coolest boy in this entire lame city. I've been crushing on him since I was like twelve.
  • Chad: Uh, okay.
  • Normal Girl: Did I just say that out loud!?
  • Chad: *sits at the table* Listen, I don't care what you or your friend think of me. I need help!
  • Best Friend: Have you murdered somebody?
  • Normal Girl: Do you need a girlfriend?
  • Chad: No, it's the ocean. The sound of her waves crashing against the shore is like a faultless siren song. There isn't a single night where I don't have visions of floating within her cold embrace. The allure of her boundless depths beckon to me like a lover. I'm afraid that if I don't get help soon, I'll find myself taken away by her to a fate unknown.
  • Normal Girl: *internally* Great, this is a chance to finally use my power to speak to cetaceans to my benefit! *externally* But why do you need us to help you?
  • Chad: You guys are the biggest fucking degenerate weirdos in this washed up town. If anyone knows how to deal with this, it's you two.
  • Best Friend: Haha, truuuuuu!
  • Normal Girl: I'm not a weirdo! I'm a completely normal girl.
  • Chad: Dude, you fucking talk to fish.
  • Best Friend: You do talk to fish.
  • Normal Girl: I don't talk to fish! *internally* I talk to cetaceans, they're mammals, not fish. Also, that's supposed to be a secret, dammit!
  • *at the shore*
  • Chad: Ah, Mother Ocean! Take me!! Take me!!! *attempts to run into the ocean, but gets held back by the normal girl and her best friend*
  • Best Friend: Simmer down, aqualad!
  • Chad: Why did you fools take me here, if not to release into the embrace of sweet Mother Ocean!?
  • Normal Girl: We talked it over and we decided that the best way to get you over your obsession is make you hate the ocean.
  • Chad: Does it involve you talking to fish?
  • Normal Girl: Yes, I mean no. I mean, fuck! Cetaceans aren't fish.
  • *the normal girl sits at the edge of shore, her eyes rolls up in her head as she proceeds to make fucked up porpoise sounds*
  • Normal Girl: *falls over limp*
  • Best Fried: She died.
  • Chad: Does this mean that I'm free to wade into Mother Ocean and meet my fate among her ever chaotic waes?
  • Best Friend: *lets chad go* Yeah, dude. I'm too far gone to care about things anymore.
  • Chad: *strips off all of his clothes* Good. I now understand that there was no avoiding this. This was always a forgone conclusion. My fate is with the waves. Sayonara, weird best friend guy.
  • Chad: *runs into the ocean*
  • Best Friend: *kicks the normal girl's body* Guess she really is dead.
  • Best Friend: *walks home as the night encroaches* My closest friend is dead, and Chad is probably dead too. I wonder where my fate lies?
  • Best Friend: *yawns* Maybe I should go to sleep and just dance myself to death finally. No, I don't think I could go to sleep even if I wanted to anymore. I'm probably going to die from exhaustion in the next few days, not having felt rest or comfort again. Or maybe I'll just stay awake forever. I feel like I was supposed to have an epiphany here, or some type of awakening. But, there's nothing. I feel like everything I've ever done has been pointless. God, I'm just really tired.
  • *back at the shore*
  • Porpoise: *beaches itself*
  • *a gray fleshy version of the normal girl crawls halfway out of the porpoises mouth*
  • Normal Girl: There goes my corpse! *drags her weird porpoise body towards the corpse* Why did I die with such a dumb expression on my face? Lame! I hope Chad didn't see.
  • Normal Girl: *looks around with beady eyes* No one's here. I can finally do this.
  • Normal Girl: *kisses her dead body on the lips* Blargh!
  • Normal Girl: *spits out blood* I bit my tongue when I died. Gross. I guess I can cross making out with my dead body and becoming a mermaid off of my bucket list, though.
  • Normal Girl: *sighs*

roxyblade  asked:

Hi Carrie. I don't know if you're doing prompts or anything but I needed to ask anyway. You're always able to help me when I need it (when my mum was diagnosed with cancer and when I broke my elbow). I had to have my 12 year old German Shepherd put to sleep last night (April 28th) and I feel so empty and lost now. I don't know what to do and I was hoping you could write something to cheer me up/help/distract me?

i’m so sorry to hear about your dog. this is a little late, but i’ve been travelling and stuff and i’ve only seen this message just now. sending you lots of love, and i hope this ficlet cheers you up a bit

Derek loves his family, he really does. But sometimes he wishes they weren’t so… weird. And it’s not that he doesn’t have fun at the annual Hale-Extravaganza, the ridiculous family reunion that they hold every summer at Lake Bellasue. When he was a kid, he looked forward to it every year, how all the Hales from all over the country would gather and he’d get to see his favorite cousin from Texas and see Aunt Jo and Uncle Monty argue over jam and his grandma would make all the best food. It’s two weeks of potato-sack races, scavenger hunts, s’mores, swimming, and more, and the only time Derek sees his cousins and stuff. 

Even if they weren’t werewolves, they’d still be weird. For instance: Derek is wearing a bright pink t-shirt (Cora’s design, this year) that proudly declares HALE PACK WEST COAST BEST COAST because in about an hour he and the other kids (Derek is twenty-two years old, and he can’t believe he still has to play all these games) on his team are gonna face off against the cousins from New York. 

The matching t-shirts, Derek could probably explain. There are a lot of families who do that. There’s at least two other reunions (none quite as large as the Hales) at this lake, which is a popular vacation destination. Derek’s never took much notice of the other people there; just usually kids on spring break from the local college partying and swimming and racing around on jetskis and stuff. 

But this year is different.

“Hey, Derek!” 

Oh, fuck, he’s shirtless again. Derek can see every one of his moles playfully scattered across his chest. There’s a mole right on his hip, and Derek freezes. 

“Hi,” he manages, his throat closing up. Derek is painfully aware that there is glitter on his cheeks, and probably mashed potatoes still in his hair, and he’s wearing mismatched flipflops. 

Theoretically, Derek should be annoyed by Stiles– everything from the backwards hat, the board shorts, the litany of “dudes” that flow from his mouth, the fact that he is one of the obnoxious spring breakers. But the first time they ran into each other, Stiles immediately got into an argument about him about Star Wars (Derek absolutely does not count the extended universe as canon, and Stiles does), and then proceeded to help Derek’s two year old niece tie her shoe and well… Derek is, for the lack of better word, very, very distracted this family reunion.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Dude can you do a continuation of the sparrow thing where hanzo gets nicknames at overwatch and his reaction to it

Heck yeah I can, and I’m gonna make it McHanzo-flavored to boot

—–

Hanzo follows Genji to Overwatch after a couple of months, after the knowledge that he lives has eaten too far into him to ignore. Genji is wary, as he should be, but nonetheless incredibly pleased that Hanzo has joined him.

The first time Genji calls him Brother, for the first time in ten years, Hanzo excuses himself after and has a panic attack in his room.

People in Overwatch are … friendly. More or less.

They all start with that distrust of him, that is true, and he doesn’t blame them one bit. He is surprised they allowed him to join them at all, and probably would have thrown them off the high Gibraltar cliffs if Genji hadn’t vouched for him.

Genji has other names, now; everyone refers to him with fondness. Lena calls him Luv, which Hanzo learns is a general term of endearment for her. Lucio and Hana call him Ninja, which strikes Hanzo as a little too literal. 

Most of them call him either Hanzo or Shimada-san, depending on how aware they are of Japanese honorifics. He expects epithets more like Murderer or Traitor. It would be no less than he deserves.

The only one who doesn’t shy away is the cowboy, who doesn’t call him much of anything outside of partner, the same way anyone else would say friend.

“I do not think they want me here,” Hanzo admits to Genji one evening. Because why would they?

“They do,” Genji assures him. “You are a valuable asset. And they like you, when you’re being pleasant. Do not worry, brother.”

Hanzo manages not to have a panic attack this time, but it’s a near thing.

When the nicknames do start, Hanzo is startled, almost afraid. 

Lucio’s nickname for him is Legolas, a reference that Hanzo doesn’t understand but is assured is appropriate–and once Reinhardt hears it, he is nothing less than ecstatic and also starts saying it. Lena’s is still Luv, like it is for most people, or sometimes Broody if she’s teasing. Hana just call him an old man, which he accepts in good humor because he probably does seem old, compared to her. It is better than what she could be calling him. 

McCree eventually calls him Archer, but Hanzo thinks he would not mind him just calling him by name just to hear it in McCree’s rich, drawling voice.

One of the things McCree calls everyone else is an odd one: Darlin’. It’s the kind of thing one would expect to hear only between significant others, but McCree just shrugs and says, “I dunno, I don’t really notice when I say it. I just say it to people I like sometimes.”

Hanzo monitors its usage. McCree mostly calls the women darling, moreso when he’s trying to be sweet (or get something) and with the people he’s known the longest. Once, he even says it to Genji.

Hanzo realizes he has never heard it aimed his way. When the realization hits, his stomach twists and churns with cold, vicious jealousy. For a brief second, he hates that once again, his own brother is being shown the kind of affection he never is.

Horror and shame dawn on him immediately after, and he can’t bear to look Genji in the eye for the rest of the night.

McCree kisses him one night, after a mission that was just this side of too close for comfort. Hanzo accepts it, kisses back, takes what he can before McCree realizes his mistake.

But McCree never shows a hint of regret, and Hanzo doesn’t have the courage to end it before he ruins it. 

After that night, McCree’s names for him take a turn: now it’s darling and sweetheart and, on one or two occasions, gorgeous. Hanzo sometimes forgets that these terms are aimed at him, sometimes that they’re aimed only at him.

They’re not really nicknames, Hanzo realizes after a little while. They’re pet names. Affection. Perhaps, he thinks wildly, maybe even love.

Hanzo can’t remember if he’s ever called anyone, aside from his family, anything but their name. But he tries it one night, takes McCree’s word and turns it back to him, the word darling feeling unfamiliar and childish as he murmurs it against the warm skin of McCree’s neck. 

McCree says nothing, but he grins a bashful sort of smile, and Hanzo resolves to make that the only thing he ever calls him again.

Dating Draco Malfoy Would Include...

Originally posted by legendrarrymalfoy

***not my gif

~ Him telling you how beautiful and smart you are every two seconds

~ “You’re so bloody gorgeous, darling. Honestly, you could tone it down a bit. You’re making me look bad.”  

~ Doing homework by the Black Lake on nice days

~ Him sneaking into your dorm late at night 

~ Stealing his clothes 

~ He would complain about it but secretly think it was so attractive

~ He would show you off with so much confidence

~ Going to every Quidditch match and cheering on Draco (even if you’re in a different house)

~ Him ordering Crabbe and Goyle to get things for you 

~ Them hating you

~ Holding hands during long walks around Hogsmeade

~ Draco would be so confident in you and believe you could do anything you set your mind to. It would just be so encouraging. 

~ Narcissa would frequently steal you away and Draco would be so annoyed

~ Professors taking points from Slytherin and your house for PDA

~ So mUCH PDA

~ Sneaking into the kitchens well after midnight and cooking five course meals 

~ Draco would be such a good cook omg

~ Narcissa would’ve taught him how

~ Holding hands under the table during class

~ When Draco became prefect, he would give detention to anyone that so much as looked at you wrong

~ After dating Draco for a while you would turn into such a badass just like him

~ He would be so proud

~ Going to the Yule Ball together

~ Him loving dancing with you after that

~ Draco would tease you all the time

~ Christmas at Malfoy Manor

~ Baths in the prefect bathroom

~ Stupid pick up lines

~ “Are you a snitch?” 

~ “What?” 

~ “Because you’re the greatest catch here.” 

~ “Hey, Y/N? I don’t need ‘accio’ to make you come.” 

~ Really good sex

~ Sneaking firewhiskey into the Slytherin Tower

~ Draco would be so touchy 

~ SMIRKS 

~ He would obsessively make sure you’re content 

~ “Y/N, are you cold? Do you want some butterbeer?” 

~ “No, I’m fine. Thanks, though.” 

~ “Here babe, take my scarf. Crabbe, go get two butterbeers.”

~ Watching the Black Lake from the common room and pointing out all the creatures

~ Him taking you on broom rides and doing crazy tricks to impress you

~ Which usually scares the hell out of you

~ But you loved being in the sky

~ Harry Potter would not be allowed to even breathe in your general direction

~ A first year Hufflepuff accidentally bumping into you and knocking your books out of your hand

~ Draco pinning him against the wall and threatening him until he cries

~ “Draco, what the hell is wrong with you!”

~ “He hurt you!” 

~ “It was an accident! Bloody hell, Draco! He’s eleven!” 

~ “’M sorry darling, just instincts…” 

~ Him helping you with homework 

~ You getting so stressed because you don’t understand and just having a mental breakdown because O.W.L.S are so close

~ Him just doing your homework for you

~ Snape recognizes his handwriting but doesn’t say anything

~ Yelling at him about the word “mudblood” 

~ EVERYONE in the entire school would know that you were his 

~ When the basilisk is out and about he walks you to every class even if he’s late for his own

~ Since Draco is a literal genius you two would both put your names in the Goblet of Fire

~ He would love to kiss you

~ The kisses would rang from little pecks to him literally trying to suck your face off

~ Harry would hate you

~ Ron would think you were the hottest creature on the planet

~ Hermoine would secretly admire how smart and independent you were

~ Lucius loving you and always telling you embarrassing things about Draco 

~ Lucius would be like a second father to you 

~ He would be so hard on Draco, but the second something upset you he would be threatening to kill

~ Him and Narcissa would send you on shopping sprees all the time

~ Draco would love shopping with you

~ “Will you try on lingerie for me?” 

~ Little arguments all the time

~ Exploring Hogwarts and knowing about lots of the castle’s secrets

~ Discovering the Mirror of Erised together

~ “What do you see?” 

~ “You.” 

~ Him loving to play with your hair

~ Jealousy 

~ SO MUCH JEALOUSLY

~ You sharing notes with Goyle and Draco ignoring you both for the rest of the day

~ “Draco, what is your problem? I need love and attention, stop ignoring me.” 

~ “Go get some attention from Goyle.” 

~ You HATING Pansy Parkinson

~ Her knowing and trying to get in arguments with you every day

~ Her twirling her hair and batting her eyelashes at Draco in the hallway, “Dracy, are you still helping me with my Potions later? You promised.” 

~ You just walking up and snogging Draco right in the middle of their conversation and whispering something super dirty in his ear

~ “N-No, Pansy. I,” he has to stop and clear his throat “I don’t think that I can.” 

~ Him just loving you so, so much 

~ Draco would just be the best boyfriend

~ Like despite everything he goes through he always puts you first 

~ He just loves you so much ugh 

~ It would be so good

This was probably entirely too long but I love everything about Draco Malfoy so I can’t help it.

anonymous asked:

Okay, serious talking now. What would be the worst point in each paladin to attack. We know about Lance's insecurities, but what else? What about the others? I want to read your opinion because you do awsome meta and character analysis.

???????? Wow, thank you ;A; And I’m not sure if I can answer this well for all paladins but I’ll try^^ [tl;dr at the end because this post has gotten really long]


Let’s start with Lance. Lance honestly has many points to attack, which is probably why this fandom is so focused on langst. It’s easy to create content for that because we have so much to work with:

1. his insecurities about his role on the team and in general

I already wrote a lot about it here (and also here a little), desperately trying to figure out how strong these insecurities are but there is no doubt that they exist^^ Surprisingly, they actually seem to be very strong, to the point that fandom only exaggerates them slightly. Lance is just pretty good at hiding them.

2. homesickness

Lance is homesick. Really homesick. He’s homesick to the point that he would leave a party to hang out alone and get lost in his memories:

He is also the one that references his life on Earth the most often. “I missed 14 days for a stomachache in 3rd grade that I never really had”, “That’s the tagline of 6 of my favorite movies” - those are little things, not very important in the overall picture but they prove that he thinks back to his past. 

3. fear of death/unnatural things that are dangerous

Lance isn’t afraid of aliens, that’s not what I mean with it - I’m talking about the episode Crystal Venom where the castle was trying to kill him. Here is an analysis on how deeply that episode really disturbed him. As for his fear of dying - he is the one that has been confronted with death the most of all the paladins (excluding Shiro - but Shiro has lost/repressed lots of his traumatic memories). Here’s proof:

S1E1. He thought Hunk had died in the explosion when they were trying to retrieve the yellow lion. S1E4. The explosion nearly killed him - “you would have died if Hunk and Coran hadn’t gotten a new crystal” (Pidge, S1E6). S1E9. He almost got sucked out of an airlock. S2E2. The snake monster thingy got free of the stone and Lance was in the direct line of fire.

He was the one screaming “we’re gonna die, we’re gonna die!!” in S2E5 when they had to hold the lenses for the wormhole maker. Lance is scared of death not despite but because he knows it the best of all of them. He almost died multiple times and he saw his friends almost dying multiple times (the Hunk thingy I included above, when he saved Coran from the explosion, when he thought he had to save Coran in “Crystal Venom”, when Pidge in the cube episode got shot down and didn’t reply to them). Look at his reaction vs the reaction of the other paladins when they thought Allura had died:

They are all shocked and disbelieving, meanwhile Lance:

He’s neither shocked nor disbelieving, he’s just hurt. One of his deepest fears became reality and there is nothing he could do about it.

Keep reading

Writing Tips - YOI Edition

I decided to start my little series of writing tips with a Yuri On Ice specific post because that’s the fandom I’m most familiar with. While I’ll make examples from the anime, keep in mind that most of these things can be taken in a more general way and applied to other fandoms as well.

These are only tips and if you don’t follow them that’s perfectly fine, your fanfiction is valid.


LANGUAGES:

Different characters speak different languages with each other, and implementing that in your fic can make it feel more realistic. That doesn’t mean that you have to include a full dialogue in a language other than the one of your fic (although a few words thrown here and there like terms of endearment are always good, and even a couple of full sentences are fine, just remember to translate them in the notes), but there are ways to show this even if you don’t do that. Simply have your POV character hear a dialogue and not understanding it, and asking about it later (or just wondering about it in their head). Another small thing is to not have the POV character be surprised by this (unless for very specific reasons): they’re used to being in international environments and to hearing different languages being spoken by other skaters, so it’s usually not a big deal to them.

Another tip is to understand what being bilingual (or tri- or multilingual) means. We don’t randomly start mixing two languages. The only instance where I’ve had that happen to me is when for some reason a word in one of the language I speak has to be in my sentence, then it might happen that I actually keep talking in that language. 

Example:

Gli ho detto che è bravo nel multitasking, and like-”

As you can see, the “and like” is some of those things we’re used to saying to connect sentences (like “you know” and other stuff), so it’s something easy to slip into if we’ve just said a word in English. You also see I stopped the sentence there because that’s what I feel happens, you don’t go on speaking in a different language for ten minutes, you usually notice right away and stop yourself.

That’s a very specific example of course, but what will mostly happen in your fic is that a character will switch back and forth effortlessly.

Examples: 

Yuuri is talking to Victor in English, then his mom brings them homemade katsudon and Yuuri thanks her and holds a short conversation with her in Japanese. Then he goes back to speaking to Victor.

Yuri and Otabek are speaking on skype in Russian. Otabek’s sister enters his room and asks him in Kazakh to help her with her homework, and he tells her (in Kazakh) that he’ll be right there, then he proceeds to explain Yuri what happened in Russian and they say goodbye and hang up.

Yuri and Victor are talking at the rink in Russian, then Yuuri skates towards him, and both Yuri and Victor switch to English to include Yuuri in the conversation.


Who speaks what language:

Generally speaking, all skaters interact in English.

Victor, Yuri, Mila, Georgi, Yakov, Lilia, Nikolai all speak Russian among each other. They might use English around other people if they don’t want to be rude to them, but in general they’ll have a tendency to keep speaking in Russian to each other, no matter how fluent in English they are.

Victor speaks fluent French as well as Russian and English, so it’s safe to believe that he and Chris speak French when they communicate.

Looking at the Japanese side of things, Yuuri, Yuuko (probably her husband too), Minako and Mari all speak fluent English, contrary to Yuuri’s parents who don’t appear to speak it at all. The triplets are 6 years old so they most definitely only speak Japanese. I headcanon that Minami doesn’t really speak a good English since he doesn’t appear to have competed much or at all outside of Japan, but I don’t think we have enough info about him so do what you want with him.

Otabek’s first language is Kazakh. It uses the same alphabet as Russian but it’s a different thing, but Kazakhs generally learn Russian and Otabek is definitely fluent in it. He’s also lived in the US and in Canada so he’s fluent in English as well. When he interacts with Yuri you should keep in mind that they’re speaking Russian.

Of course, when writing post-canon, it’s entirely possible and even very likely that the couples (or even friends, for example Yuuri and Phichit probably learned a little of Thai and Japanese respectively) pick up each other’s languages. Victor will learn Japanese, Yuuri will learn Russian, Emil will learn Italian. I headcanon that in some couples only one of them will learn the other’s language (for example I don’t think it’d be very useful for Yuri to learn more than a little basic Kazakh), but that’s absolutely up to you.

Another thing I personally like to do in my fanfics whenever there’s characters with different nationalities is to remind the reader that everyone has different accents. You don’t have to point it out in every sentence, but even just doing it once in your whole fic will make it feel, once again, more realistic. Another accent fun fact: at the beginning it’s hard to understand an accent you’ve never heard before, but it gets easier the more you keep hearing it. Try to think of ways to show that in your fanfic if that’s something you want to do.


NICKNAMES: 

Another important aspect in YOI is the use of nicknames, like Yurio or Katsudon. The thing is, not everyone uses them, and not in every context. If you want to use them in a fic and be true to canon, learn who uses them and why.

Yurio 

is a nickname given by Mari to Yuri P. to avoid confusion between him and her brother Yuuri. Yuuri, Victor and Yuuri’s family and friends are the only ones using it. Yuri hates it. He wouldn’t use it for himself, so avoid using it in your fic unless:

  • the characters I mentioned above are talking to him
  • one of the characters above is also the POV character (especially if it’s first person)
  • Yuri himself is complaining about it

Especially avoid using it when:

  • it’s Yuri’s POV
  • it’s the POV of someone close to Yuri or who knew Yuri before canon (like his grandpa, Yakov, Mila, etc)
  • it’s Otabek’s POV. He’s his friend (or more) and he would use his given name (unless for some reason he wanted to annoy him - which he probably would at some point lol)

Yura/Yurochka 

I don’t feel educated enough to talk about this myself, I could only say what I saw in the anime but you should definitely read this post because it’s well done and explains who would call Yuri Yura or Yurochka.

Katsudon

Only Yuri calls Yuuri Katsudon (sometimes he switches it for pig). Victor called Yuuri little piglet or something at the beginning of canon, but definitely doesn’t do it later on.

(Beka)

This is not canon yet, but it’s a really widespread nickname for Otabek within the fandom, that only Yuri (or Otabek’s family) uses.


In general, I think nicknames rub off on the people we talk to. So for example, when I write Otayuri I sometimes have Otabek think of Yuuri as “Katsudon”. Why? Because at least at the beginning he would only hear Yuri talk about him, and Yuri would refer to him with that nickname. He would probably not call Yuuri like that directly in a dialogue, but that’s all just speculation. I just added this bit because I think it’s one of the many ways to both build someone’s characterization and show instead of telling the kind of relationship two characters have.


Other writing tips: (coming soon!)

general pt.1 | general pt.2 | plot | dialogues | characterization

Coda to 12x13

With Dad he never had the chance to be the good son, was always the one who was sulking, misstepping, kicking back; and it was Dean who was mediating, negotiating, policing, Dean who had Dad’s trust and respect and even, occasionally, praise. 

So sue him if he saw some inversion of that tension in Mom and Dean’s relationship, Dean’s sulky rejection and Mom’s apparent unease with the fact they were hunting; sue him if he thought maybe he could be the bridge between them, if he pictured in some prideful selfish part of himself Mom grateful for his understanding, saw Dean making tentative peace with Mom and the both of them thanking him for clearing the way. Sue him if he thought maybe some way down the line, he could talk to Mom about Stanford and the fact that it was so fucking hard to get there, that he worked himself to the bone for it and he did it and hear her say that she’s proud. 

He tries. He tries. He watches Dean scowl every time they see their mother and he works, honestly works to try and smooth things over, talks to Dean and talks to Mom and tries to help them see the other point of view. And if he catches Dean texting surreptitiously, later, he’s pleased about it. It’s good, right? That was the point, and there’s no reason she should message them both. They’re together all the time anyway. He doesn’t care. He even fucking helps Dean think of Scrabble words to play against her, “come on Einstein,” Dean says, “what can I do with three Gs and a K?” Sam doesn’t have that stupid app anyway. So. 

He knows his self-esteem’s for shit and it’s something he’s trying to work on. It makes him oversensitive and that’s not fair on everybody else. He can’t expect, shouldn’t expect, people to read his mind; if he doesn’t explain his feelings then how can he expect other people to act on them? He knows and so he’s careful not to let it bother him, when Mom turns up Dean’s music and eats Dean’s cold bacon and laughs conspiratorial with Dean about the car. He sucks it up when he tries to ask Mom how she’s doing and she snaps at him, when she says to him “life’s not about getting what you want,” as if that were news. As if she hadn’t asked him, back on that first night before she got to know him a little better and decided that he wasn’t worth the effort (fuck off, Sam, take your fucking pity party somewhere else), if she hadn’t asked what brought him back in – like she might have space for a world in which Sam could admit that he’s not sure he wants this, not always, not forever. 

He doesn’t know how to stop acting like this, praise-desperate and appeasing. It’s fucking pathetic. He’s still doing it when she drops the bombshell; has barely closed his lips on shushing Dean’s grumpy greeting, is still smiling carefully big to set his mother at ease when she outright tells them that she’s working with the Brits. 

“But,” he says, and he can’t help it, deafened almost by the sudden thundering of his blood in his ears. She’s nervous, but she’s not… she’s looking at Dean, more than him, and he can see in his mind Dean’s stony expression but he can’t get himself together enough to turn his head and look. 

“We don’t… trust them,” Sam says slowly, and how is he supposed even to begin to articulate the reasons why? “Broken ribs,” he says. “Burnt feet.” The blowtorch, so bright and he cringing away, trying hard to be strong (‘screw you’) and the women unshaken, laughing, the charred-meat smell and the all too familiar sizzle-pop sound of his flesh. And Lady Bevell’s face, amused, and her body underneath him and Sam flushed hot with shame, ‘was it good for you’ and the lurch of his stomach as he understood what she’d done. Has Mom. He can’t stop himself from thinking it, Mom in a bar and the man, Ketch, his stupid round-vowelled accent as he tells the story, ‘of course your youngest couldn’t help but succumb to my lady’s charms’. And Mom incredulous, disgusted, discounting the whole experience because Sam asked for it, after all. No wonder she doesn’t want to look him in the eye. No wonder she doesn’t – and his stomach heaves again, queasy, and he pushes back his chair with a clatter because he needs to get to the bathroom, somewhere, needs to get out. 

The smell from the paper bags on the table is heavy in the air and Sam’s so loaded with mixed up feelings and he opens his mouth and says, stupid, “I fucking hate burgers anyway.” That’s it, then, it’s all right up behind his face and he has to get out before either of them sees it, running down the corridor to lock himself in the bathroom where he can hyperventilate and throw up like he’s fifteen and just argued with Dad. 

He can hear voices raised behind him as he goes, Dean hard and angry and he’s glad for that, selfish, some part of him glad at the wedge between them, glad for the conflict that’s put Dean on his side. 

(Later, a knock at the door and Dean’s voice, “Sammy?” Sam lets him in, slides back to the floor where he’s sat against the bath. “Sam, what happened with those Brits?” says Dean, and Sam shakes his head, hides his face against his thighs. “Sam,” says Dean, with a thready kind of urgency, “you don’t… man, you never…” He clears his throat. “It’s not just the foot.” 

Sam shakes his head, still pressed tight against the denim. He’s not gonna talk about it. He’s not. 

Dean’s fingers touch his hair, just lightly. “I told Mom she should have brought you rabbit food,” he says. It’s well-intentioned but it makes Sam’s throat close up.) (Dean over the dinner table like “Sammy made the soccer team,” and Dad like “Didn’t I say we’re leaving next week?”) 

(Dean the person and Sam the other, the object, the burden.)

(Crusts off your sandwiches, baby? Guess it’s not your memory, Sam.)

here’s a checklist for those of you getting mixed messages about fetishization of mlm (men loving men) especially with the whole anti-anti/antis thing getting everything all muddled.

am i depicting mlm in a good way in my work of fiction?

  • can you switch the pronouns of the smaller/younger half of your pairing and be holding really sexist fanfic?
  • is consent ignored for the sake of the Sexy [and what you’re writing isn’t specifically tagged/marketed as noncon kink?]
  • is a character who is unfeminine in canon suddenly feminized in your fic for the sake of being the ‘uke’/’bottom’ in your ship?
  • are your characters ‘turning gay’ for each other with absolutely no context of people outside the ship, their own potential exploration, or the concept of bisexuality? [’closet keys’ are a thing and so are exceptions; it’s all about how you handle it esp. in regards to how the characters in question react to others and the queer/lgbt community at large]
  • if there is an age gap in your ship, are you treating the age gap as part of the romantic appeal in a work of fiction not specifically tagged/marketed as kink? [ie. is it ‘sexy’ or ‘cute’ that one is 10 years older than the other, or is it just a fact of the relationship? you don’t even need to demonize age gaps, quite the opposite - but there’s a running issue of mlm as pedophiles and 12 and 22 year olds in relationships is big nope.)
  • are things that are fairly normal in heterosexual ships (kissing, holding hands, snuggling) treated as highly sexual in your mlm ship?

if you’re doing any of these, take a step back, try to look at your work from a new light, and see if you can change any of these details.

and alternately…

  • feminine boys are great! especially when they don’t fall into a million other ‘uke’ or ‘villainous crossdresser’ tropes
  • age gap relationships especially when they take into consideration the difficulties of generational differences (queer/LGBT generational gaps even between 22 and 30 year olds are a Thing) are great!
  • talking about consent in fics, especially grey/often unexplored issues, is awesome!
  • kink fics aren’t inherently fetishizing or bad - kink covers a super broad spectrum which i am not covering here. assume everything on this list is talking about mature-and-lower-rated fanfiction with narrative intentions!

am i respecting mlm in fandom spaces and the wider world outside of my fanfiction?

  • when real-world issues come up concerning mlm and/or the queer/lgbt community, am I immediately connecting it to my favourite ship? (ie. the Russian concentration camps… aren’t about Viktuuri)
  • when mlm I personally know or interact with express concerns about yaoi, shipping, etc. am I taking it personally and/or deflecting criticism with ‘well, I’m not straight’, ‘my gay friend said X’, or ‘well, it’s only fiction’? [this doesn’t mean you need to accept all criticism; however, active listening is important especially when this criticism is well meant]
  • when mlm exist in fandom spaces am I making it unsafe for them to express concerns about their safety, ask for things to be tagged, etc.?
  • am I supporting mlm in telling their own stories as well as writing my own, or am I exclusively seeking out, reading and supporting [stories, comics, fanfiction] by non-mlm?
  • am I asking mlm to validate my inclusion of mlm in my stories/do emotional labour/free research for me without respecting their boundaries?
  • when i draw on previous reading for my stories, are any of them by mlm (essay, stories, articles) or are they all by non-mlm? [many fanfiction authors in this way unknowingly and unthinkingly perpetuate stereotypes created previously by other fanfiction authors - fandom is largely dfab and even with the growing contingent of trans men this is still a problem]
  • is my entire identity wrapped around shipping men together/am i avoiding heterosexual and/or femslash ships out of pure impulse?
  • when mlm bring up issues of representation, is your first response anger?

alternately..

  • read thinkpieces, articles, or books about growing up gay! they’re good reads anyway
  • if somebody who is an mlm offers critique or expresses frustration, try to stop and think it over. often we’ve been met with the same roadblocks over and over again.
  • just because white cis gay men are overrepresented in IRL gay movements doesn’t mean that gay men are. black, latino, Asian, NDN gay experiences, bisexual male experiences, trans male experiences, etc. are severely underrepresented - and even from a creative standpoint, most straight male creators are much happier to throw lesbians into a work than to write in a gay man who gets to be happy. (not for good reasons, mind you, but i am not the person to write about lesbian representation and the deep flaws with that currently)
  • try to be honest and self-aware with yourself about why you respond to criticism - taking it out on people who often have enough to deal with isn’t fair. [if somebody’s seeking you out to be an asshole, this obviously doesn’t apply.]

am i using ‘fetishization’ as a buzzword instead of an actual concept!!!

  • does my ‘activism’ involve more anon hate than discussion?
  • am i applying fetishization to the mere concept of enjoying two men together/to kinks I don’t personally enjoy?
  • am I using it as a way to shut up people I don’t like?
  • am I beginning and ending conversations with it instead of discussing potential ways of improving both atmosphere and specific instances?
  • am I ignoring my own failures in favour of policing others? (when I do this it’s fine; when you do it, it’s bad)
  • am I accusing mlm of ‘fetishizing themselves’ when they do try to create content that centers their own experiences and it doesn’t look like what you expect?
  • am i entering arguments and discussions with decisions already made about how it should end?

alternately…

  • be open to perspectives that aren’t your own. it doesn’t matter who you are, you can’t possibly know every story in the world. intersectionality!!
  • understand that you are capable of fucking up. it doesn’t matter how many sjw or activism points you’ve earned. accept, examine and engage with criticism.
  • if something personally bothers you, you can just block and move on. it is sometimes difficult to find the line between ‘this bothers me because it’s wrong’ and ‘this bothers me because of my personal baggage’, and it takes time.

i’ve gotten a lot of messages about ‘wait am i a Bad Person’ and hopefully this helps. this obviously isn’t in-depth but it’s a start - and I’m happy to answer questions, with the proviso that 1) i am one person 2) i am not answering questions about fics specifically for titillation/kink purposes and 3) i am not doing emotional labour or being the Token Gay Friend.