you and me the royal we

Hold on to me
I’ll never want to let you go
(Run away with me, run away with me)
Over the weekend
We can turn the world to gold, oh oh
(Run away with me, run away with me)

a commission of my mc, ashanti, taking her girlfriend out for a spin! done by the extraordinary @ekushv!! go forth and commission awesome art from them, guys :D

various starters
  • ❛  you’re a weapon and weapons don’t weep.  ❜
  • ❛  hurt me once, I’ll kill you twice.  ❜
  • ❛  never trust a survivor until you learn what they did to stay alive.  ❜
  • ❛  death is the only god that comes when you call.  ❜
  • ❛  I am teeth. I am royal. you are nothing to me.  ❜
  • ❛  the sun will rise and we will try again.  ❜
  • ❛  we’re just kids. we aren’t supposed to be heroes.  ❜
  • ❛  I like my women like I like my Absinthe: bitter and intoxicating.  ❜
  • ❛  what doesn’t kill me better run.  ❜
  • ❛  she wasn’t looking for a knight. she was looking for a sword.  ❜
  • ❛  don’t dehumanize bad people, because it’s their humanity which makes what they’ve done so terrifying.  ❜
  • ❛  she isn’t just pretty. she is otherworldly and vaguely threatening.  ❜
  • ❛  magic is not good or evil. is a knife evil? only if the wielder is.  ❜
  • ❛  I don’t want your crown. see, I’ve come to burn your kingdom down.  ❜
  • ❛  they broke my wings. they forgot I have claws.  ❜
  • ❛  all that blood was never beautiful, it was just red.  ❜
  • ❛  what do you do when there’s no hero in the story? simple. you kill the monster and crown yourself.  ❜
  • ❛  how terrible it is, to love something that death can touch.  ❜
  • ❛  you may not be interested in war, but it is interested in you.  ❜
  • ❛  I feel divinity in my bones like aching. like fire.  ❜
  • ❛  you make me feel and I don’t like it. I want it to stop. now.  ❜
  • ❛  you are losing my interest and that is very dangerous.  ❜
  • ❛  she will burn your kingdoms down, herself with it, if it means your ruin.  ❜
  • ❛  it’s okay to be scared. it means your about to do something brave.  ❜
  • ❛  she looks like divine absolution.  ❜
  • ❛  I will not be another flower, picked for my beauty and left to die. I will be wild, difficult to find and impossible to forget.  ❜
  • ❛  be careful with words. they can be forgive, but never forgotten.  ❜
  • ❛  you not wanting me was the beginning of me wanting myself.  ❜
  • ❛  I’m tired of fighting. for once, I want to be fought for.  ❜
  • ❛  never run back to what broke you.  ❜
  • ❛  I was quite, but not blind.  ❜
  • ❛  your gut knows what’s up. trust that bitch.  ❜
  • ❛  we all eat lies when our hearts are hungry.  ❜
  • ❛  do not judge my story by the chapter you walked in on.  ❜
  • ❛  I’m just a girl, standing in front of a salad, wishing it was a donut.  ❜
  • ❛  you can miss something but not want it back.  ❜
  • ❛  you can’t save people, you can only love them.  ❜
  • ❛  I came, I saw, I made it awkward.  ❜
  • ❛  we buy shite we don’t need, with money we don’t have, to impress people we don’t like.  ❜
  • ❛  you’re always one decision away from a different life.  ❜
  • ❛  my brain has too many tabs open.  ❜
  • ❛  I’m not saying I hate you, just that you’re like the Monday of people.  ❜
  • ❛  there’s no ‘we’ in fries.  ❜
  • ❛  apology accepted, trust denied.  ❜
  • ❛  death and I have been scandalously intimate for some time now.  ❜
  • ❛  life happens. coffee helps.  ❜
  • ❛  I am mine before I am ever anyone else’s.  ❜
  • ❛  I rely a bit too heavily on alcohol and irony.  ❜
  • ❛  very early in my life it was already too late.  ❜
  • ❛  is that a threat or are you flirting with me.  ❜
  • ❛  was the use of force necessary in completing your objectives?  ❜
  • ❛  I’ll let you drag me to hell if it means you’ll hold my hand.  ❜
  • ❛  I do bad things, and I do them very well.  ❜
  • ❛  you drink too much, you cuss too much and you have questionable morals. you’re everything I ever wanted.  ❜
  • ❛  they will kill you, but first they will have to catch you.  ❜
  • ❛  drugs might kill you but they’ll never break your heart.  ❜
  • ❛  good girls are just bad girls that haven’t been caught.  ❜
  • ❛  a pretty face doesn’t guarantee a pretty heart.  ❜
  • ❛  no airbag, we die like men.  ❜
  • ❛  true evil is, above all, seductive.  ❜
  • ❛  it takes more courage to suffer than to die.  ❜
  • ❛  you must be lucky to avoid the wolf every time. but the wolf? he only needs enough luck to catch you once.  ❜
  • ❛  justice is vengeance in prettier packaging.  ❜
2

“Let me help you, Lena. Let me find you a place to hide.”

“You know my brother- the mad and bloody king- and what he has done. The atrocities the entire royal family, my family, has committed. I do not deserve your help.”

“Everyone deserves help, princess.”

“Spoken like a true knight. But you are not my knight.”

“…I could be.”

Fairy Tail Dragon Cry Spoilers

Hello guys, so today in Japan, Fairy Tail Dragon Cry released. I have seen spoilers a lot today but some I would love to share with you. 


First spoiler, is the starry sky scene. I love it, and I honestly can’t wait to see the movie itself.


Second spoiler, according to a translator on twitter, Natsu says “What do you see? (How do I look?) Lucy…” and Lucy responds with, “Natsu…” and he smiles, “Your definetely natsu” Which makes me scream because I didn’t think that would be her response actually because people were speculating this since we saw the first two trailers and natsu said, “Lucy, What do I look like to you?”


Third Spoiler… I uhh really don’t know what’s going on here but I am pretty sure Lucy was chained up by one of the royal people and Fairy Tail came to the rescue especially Natsu becayse he is the one who broke the chain and now is carrying her it seems.


Forth Spoiler, Lucy in this seems to be crying at first I thought that dude which if I am not mistaken’s name is Zash but I am not completely for sure since I have been mainly looking at the trailers. It seems as if he is threatening her and that’s when it looks like the wall is opened because of who I think is Natsu because he wants to save his bae. (Nalu shipper here duh)


So I translated this page actually! in the first panel natsu is actually screaming: ARGH!!!! Lucy see’s him and says “Natsu?” and as he is going towards whoever, Lucy says “Natsu…Your a bit late!” 


i WAS WAY TO LAZY TO TRANSLATE this page honestly but Natsu is carrying Lucy and I am pretty sure this is the scene was saw from Trailer 3. 


I didn’t translate this one either but yeah, here’s another spoiler.


I don’t know if this is the scene that people have been posting all over instagram where we do see Natsu hold Lucy or if this is just him collapsing in her arms and her confront him. It could honestly be two different scenes or like I said the one I have been seeing ALL OVER instagram that made me scream this morning, lmao.


This is the starry night scene I’m pretty sure. The first attempt of my translations for this, Natsu said “We had a relationship together, and I lost it… Lucy.” and then at the Lucy’s panel had said, “A stella Starry Sky.” and then the one with them looking off said “Love” or “It is cute.” Which I don’t know if this means anything or if I screwed up freaking bad translating but whatever I tried dudes.


The attempt to TRANSLATE this was like me trying to swim, it was drowning me. For natsu’s head and lucy looking up to it, I couldn’t get his translation but for her I got “I will do it. You guard by the guard watch…” and then I also got the translations : “There is nothing more than a crowd, so its hard to emphatize with me… and others…. oh yeah, it must be true.” and for Natsu I got :Come here, here it is/ Rescue Loya (Which is probaly actually Sonya) Actually is the code name.” Which didn’t really make sense to me but I tried. 


MY REACTION AFTER THESE : 

Originally posted by vieilleotaku

Also…

Originally posted by nbcthevoice

COME HERE FASTER!! IT DOESN’T RELEASE IN THE USA TILL JUNE 6TH AND I WANT IT TO COME AS FAST AS ADAM LEVINE HITTING THE I WANT YOU BUTON

can we just appreciate the fact that jamilla holds absolutely no grudge against sana over what happened. when sana said, “i was thinking about messaging you”, jamilla doesn’t say “why would you do that?” or “what for?”

she just says, “why didn’t you? what happened?”

like, i think that speaks volumes about jamilla’s character. her first thought is that of concern for sana. she’s essentially saying, why didn’t you feel like you could message me?

despite the fact that sana royally fucked up and invaded jamilla’s privacy in a way that caused jamilla to feel humiliated, jamilla is still there. she still very much wants to be a part of sana’s life, and wants to help in any way that she can. and at the end of that clip, she could tell something wasn’t right with sana. jamilla hasn’t spoken to sana in a year, and yet, after a five minute conversation, she can tell that something is troubling her.

honestly, get you a friend like jamilla.

8

lit ladies inej ghafa; what about the nobodies and the nothings, the invisible girls? we learn to hold our heads as if we wear crowns. we learn to wring magic from the ordinary. that was how you survived when you weren’t chosen, when there was no royal blood in your veins. when the world owed you nothing, you demanded something of it anyway.

My First Nat20

For Context: So it’s my first time playing DnD, I’m playing with 2 other friends who’ve also never played, and two friends who have one of which is the dm. We’re running a small combat test scenario with our characters vs some bandits and orcs. Our party consists of an Aarakocra Monk, a Human Fighter who’s focused on archery, an Elf Cleric, and myself a Teifling Bard.  The encounter starts when the Aarakocra Monk charges into the cave straight into 2 orcs and a bandit which are taken care of easily by the Monk and Fighter. After a long rest we push further into the cave into another group of enemies, this time two bandits and a single orc. The Fighter uses his sharpshooter shot and completely vaporizes the one bandit and the other bandit runs further into the cave.  The orc is now blocked off from the other bandit by our Monk

Me(ooc): I wanna try and persuade the orc to either abandon the bandits or join our team

                DM: You have to roll a persuasion check then

                *Rolls a 15+3*

                DM: The orc is now seriously reconsidering his allegiance to the bandits

                Elf(ooc) Can I give him a hug to try to further persuade him

                Aarakocra: While you guys do that I’m going to go check out the bandits last known location

The Aarakocra flies across the open cave discovering the bandit ran further into the cave to alert their boss who is now looking right at the monk who is in stabbing range

                DM: The bandit chief is going to attack you with his flurry of blows attack *rolls* two hits and a miss you take 15 damage

                Aarakocra: Welp I’m dead

                Me(ooc): Okay I want to move past the orc into cover and then cast thaumaturgy on my voice to try and intimidate the bandits, but as I pass the orc I want to hand him piece of gold and tell him to get out of here and get a drink.

                DM: Okay, what do you want to say?

                Me:  I say “This is the royal guard, put your weapons down, your hands up, and come out slowly and we won’t execute you on site

                DM: Alright now roll an intimidation check

                *Rolls a nat20*

                DM: D…Did you just roll a nat20…

                Me (Not knowing what a nat20 is): Is that bad?

                DM: *Getting a little annoyed* A nat20 is a guaranteed success, all the bandits put their weapons down and put their hands behind their heads

                Me(ooc): Did I just ruin the encounter?

                DM: THE CHIEF HAD 64 HP, HE WAS SUPPOSED TO TEACH YOU ABOUT PARTY MEMBER DEATHS

youtube

17TH OF MAY SPECIAL

THE GUYS: Dab, dab, dab, dab, dab, dab!!

[HEY BRISKEBY]

MUTASIM: Yes, we love…* Today, it’s the 18th of May, so we’re going to have a, boom, 17th of May special.

ELIAS: What are you doing?

MUTASIM: Bro..

ELIAS: You know this is my Youtube channel, right? And then you come with this 17th of May stuff..

MUTASIM: Look, look, look how tired this guy is and I’m like fresh.

MIKAEL: He has a bowtie.

MUTASIM: Bowtie! I got this, understand?

MIKAEL: [Singing]

ELIAS: But what’s the thing with the 17th of May? Why do we celebrate the 17th of May?

Keep reading

° ✧ GAME OF THRONES PROMPTS. PART II.

possible triggers, read/reblog with caution.

SEASON FOUR :

❛ You lost, friend? ❜
❛ Forgive me for staring… ❜
❛ May I tell you a secret? ❜
❛ I’m here to welcome you to the capital… ❜
❛ How did that come to pass? ❜
❛ You don’t partake? ❜
❛ I was invited to the royal wedding. ❜
❛ I thought we were speaking truth. ❜
❛ The last time I was in the capital was many years ago. ❜
❛ I’ve heard rumors. ❜
❛ I wasn’t there. I don’t know what happened– ❜
❛ You must not have been very good at your job. ❜
❛ Do you intend to execute me or am I free to go? ❜
❛ You know what? You should come with us.  ❜
❛ You got money to pay for it? ❜
❛ You don’t seem to understand the situation. ❜
❛ I place far too much trust in you. ❜
❛ You murdered them and displayed their corpses. ❜
❛ You ready for a hunt? ❜
❛ Though you’re not the champion yet, are you? ❜
❛ I’m sure they have a spare costume. ❜
❛ I would like to keep what remains of my face. ❜
❛ This one is clearly mad with lust. ❜
❛ What good is an empty cup? Fill it. ❜
❛ If you want to live, we have to leave. ❜
❛ I’m not trying to trick you. ❜
❛ They’ll be following you, now. ❜
❛ Are you going to accept their offer? ❜
❛ I will not have you dying on my behalf! ❜
❛ You got to do all seven of the fuckers? ❜
❛ Call that a fight? ❜
❛ It means something to me. ❜
❛ They want to draw us out, pick us off a few at a time. ❜
❛ There's got to be a way to protect them. ❜
❛ Your hatred for my family is…rather well known. ❜
❛ You think we conspired together? ❜
❛ But you want something in return. ❜
❛ That must be hard for you to admit. ❜
❛ I will not disappoint you. ❜
❛ I will not gamble with your life. ❜
❛ I bring your enemies what they deserve. ❜
❛ You want to live the rest of your life in chains? ❜
❛ What do you think they’ll do to us? ❜
❛ We have no training, no weapons. ❜
❛ If you want it, you must take it. ❜
❛ I will answer injustice with justice. ❜

SEASON FIVE :

❛ Trial? I have confessed. ❜
❛ My point is, we don’t choose whom we love. ❜
❛ What I’m trying and failing to say… ❜
❛ I know what you’re trying to say. ❜
❛ I think a part of me always knew and I’m glad. ❜
❛ Do you have any last words? ❜
❛ Perhaps, even you are innocent of that. ❜
❛ I can not disobey my king’s command. ❜
❛ I’m not going to kill you. ❜
❛ You’re going to advise me. ❜
❛ I’m not going to be banished…  ❜
❛ We’re all the same to them, meat for their army. ❜
❛ Why should I spend my time listening to you? ❜
❛ I will have a very large army and very large dragons. ❜
❛ What will we find when we strip away your finery? ❜
❛ Let go of vanity, pride, sin. ❜
❛ Lies come easily to you, everyone knows that. ❜
❛ I just need a moment of your time. ❜
❛ How many centuries before we learn how to build cities like this again? ❜
❛ This is my home. And you can’t frighten me. ❜
❛ It takes courage to admit fear, and to admit a mistake. ❜
❛ I came here to you that I was wrong. ❜
❛ This isn’t a strange place, this is my home. ❜
❛ You’re going the wrong way. ❜
❛ What a waste of a good kidnapping. ❜
❛ So happens, I was heading there myself. ❜
❛ The dead don’t need lovers, only the living. ❜
❛ Don’t you want to chase the rats out of it? ❜
❛ My place is here. ❜
❛ I’m giving you a chance to avenge your family. ❜
❛ I wish I could fight beside you. ❜
❛ I can imagine no higher praise. ❜
❛ I won’t try and dissuade you. ❜
❛ I’m sorry I’m always snapping at you. ❜
❛ If you didn’t snap at me I wouldn’t learn anything. ❜
❛ I’m going to show you how to ride properly. ❜
❛ I can teach you how to fight. ❜
❛ I suppose that’s more important. ❜
❛ You loved your family, avenge them. ❜
❛ There’s no justice in the world. Not unless we make it. ❜
❛ I don’t feel guilty. That’s what’s odd. ❜
❛ They don’t fear you, they don’t follow you.  ❜
❛ And how long will that be? ❜
❛ There are only two like it in the world. ❜
❛ You never told me why you set me free. ❜
❛ You’re not family, you owe me nothing. ❜

SEASON SIX :

❛ Everything they’ve taken from us, we’re going to take back. ❜
❛ It’s a good thing you’re not a boy/girl anymore. ❜
❛ That’s what I do. I drink and I know things. ❜
❛ I’m here to help. Don’t eat the help. ❜
❛ I’ve heard conflicting reports. ❜
❛ What kind of god would have a pecker that small? ❜
❛ My reign has just begun. ❜
❛ We make peace with our enemies, not our friends. ❜
❛ If you did know, you’re my enemy. ❜
❛ If you didn’t know, you’re an idiot. ❜
❛ Fuck justice then. We’ll get revenge. ❜
❛ Violence is a disease. ❜
❛ You’re shit at dying, you know that? ❜
❛ Trust me – if my soup didn’t kill you, nothing will. ❜
❛ We may as well be taking shits back here. ❜
❛ If you ever come back this way, I will execute you myself. ❜
❛ You don’t have to be here. ❜
❛ Perhaps we should take shelter. ❜
❛ Have you ever met the blackfish? ❜
❛ Why did we have to come here? ❜
❛ That is hardly your concern. ❜
❛ The gods have a plan for us all. ❜
❛ Have they hurt you? Have they mistreated you? ❜
❛ Is there no other way? ❜
❛ Come with me…now. The dead don’t rest. ❜
❛ I’m tired of fighting. It’s all I’ve done since I left home. ❜
❛ Where will you go? ❜
❛ After they stabbed you, where did you go? ❜
❛ What do you remember? ❜
❛ They obviously had help. ❜
❛ Next time I have an idea like that, punch me in the face. ❜
❛ If I lost my cock I would drink all the time. ❜
❛ Apologies for what you are about to see. ❜
❛ And we’re going to fight it in there? ❜
❛ Sinners don’t make demands, they make confessions. ❜
❛ I offer my services once again. ❜
❛ Help me get him/her inside. ❜
❛ I have never been much of a fighter. ❜
❛ The three eyed raven says there’s a war coming. ❜
❛ We have to cross here. ❜
❛ I can’t speak for the flames, but he’s/she’s gone. ❜
❛ If we don’t take back the north, we’ll never be safe. ❜
❛ I want you to help me, but I’ll do it myself if I have to. ❜
❛ Don’t you wish we could go back to the day we left?  ❜
❛ I want to scream at myself, “don’t go you idiot.” ❜
❛ That’s what you said. ❜

TRANSLATION -  DONT TALK TO ME 

“acid in the face”

“with hijab?”

“circumcision” 

“did you see how hard he hit?”

“why do you wear that shit?”

Sana: hey, jamilla

*scrolls up*

Jamilla: I’m just trying to protect you

Sana; Thanks, but no thanks

Jamilla: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!?!!!!

Sana: SORRY! There has been a misunderstanding! I thought you had posted crap about me!! Let me explain! I’m calling you now!

Eva: what is this?

Sana: I quit the bus

Chris: what?!

Sana: I’m not going to be russ

Eva: now that we have gotten a bus and people and everything is working out, and then you quit?

Chris: whats happening?

Sana: it just isn’t that important for me to be Russ

Noora: it was pretty important to you a little while ago?

Sana: maybe i have decided that it goes against my values to stand and watch girls lose all their self respect for that royal hat?

Sana: how is it going with…?

Isak: fine! It’s going fine

Sana: sorry again for that my brother…

Isak: its fine, don’t think about it

Teacher: okay, we’re going through alot this lesson. Its mid terms next week and some of you are far behind so its important.. 

Isak: that applies to me, thats for sure. can’t you help me a little, Sana? I am so fucked, I am so far behind

Sana: sorry, you just have to realize the hard truth

Isak: that i get…. a 4?

Sana: that you’re alone

Loki Imagine - Kneel

This takes place during Odin’s sleep when Loki was king. Warning: Smut!

Originally posted by the-lokis-queen

Your P.O.V.

Something was going on here on Asgard. A bad feeling had taken place in me and I felt nervous without a reason. So I walked around the streets, eyeing everyone who walked past me. The people didn’t seem suspicious. Yes, some of them were a little tense but I wasn’t sure why. 

After walking around until it was dark, I was stopped by two royal guards. I saw the bright yellow of their capes and it caught my attention. ‘’King Loki needs to speak with you’’ One of them informed me which had surprised me. Not because Loki wanted to see me, we were great friends. I was surprised as they called him a king.

Out of shock I had been silent. Had Odin died? Was that the reason for my bad gut feeling?

I let the guards take me to the golden palace. As we walked there, I felt the knot in my stomach growing tighter. For the first time in a while, I was nervous to meet Loki. Was he alright? What the hell was happening behind the closed doors?

The throne room was only lit by flames as I finally made my way there. The guards stopped by their spots, allowing me to walk further inside by myself. I was a familiar face here, since both Thor and Loki had been my friends as we grew up. I had slowly become more attached to Loki and the last few times we’ve met, it had gotten quite heated, if that’s what you could describe it as.

I reached the throne, shocked as I saw absolutely no guards. My eyes directed at Loki who sat on the throne. My eyes widened by the sight. He was wearing his black and green suit, his golden head piece and he held a golden spear. I’d be lying if I said he didn’t look good up there.

‘‘I’ve been waiting for you, Y/N’‘ Loki broke the silence between us. He had a mischievous smile on his beautifully sculptured face. The way he spoke made my heart skip a beat. ‘‘King Loki’‘ I breathed out, enjoying the taste of the words in my mouth. Loki’s smile faded and suddenly he leaned against his big hand, looking at me very intensely. The dark look in his pretty emerald eyes sent shivers down my spine. 

‘‘Come closer’‘ He encouraged me and glanced at the steps on the throne. I licked my lips, suddenly finding them dry. Then I did as told, walking towards him slowly, taking cautious steps and looking at his face. He never told me to stop and I found myself almost right in front of me. I wasn’t sure what he was doing but I liked it. He made me feel like I was on an adventure by just looking in my direction. He filled my veins with adrenaline, giving me a pleasant rush.

‘‘Kneel’‘ Loki demanded sharply, making my knees weak. I never broke eye contact as I lowered myself in front of him, kneeling for my king. He seemed pleased as I obeyed him so well. Loki loved that about us. We had discovered new sides of each other lately as our friendship had developed to this intense relationship. I had learned that he was dominating and I was surprised as I realized how submissive I was. It was a perfect combo.

‘‘You’re such a good girl, Y/N’‘ He purred happily and touched my hair with his hand, almost like he was petting me. Judging by the smug look on his face, he knew exactly what he was doing to me. My underwear was most definitely getting soaked and I felt a familiar heat between my legs.

‘’Is there anything I could do for you, your majesty?’‘ I asked him with an innocent look on my face, teasing him on purpose. I looked at his face, nearly overwhelmed by his beauty. The flames in the room illuminated his features with an orange and golden glow. Loki looked absolutely majestic as he sat on Asgard’s throne.

His gentle touch turned rough as he grabbed my hair and pulled me closer to him. I put my hands on his knees so I wouldn’t lose my balance and it seemed like it was his plan as well. ‘’You have ignored me for the past few days, why?’’ Loki wanted to know, never letting go of me. His gorgeous eyes were locked with mine and I felt like I had to tell him the truth, like his look hypnotized me.

‘‘Oh’‘ My lips curved into a smirk. ‘‘I’m sorry, I’ve been busy’‘ I revealed as little as possible. Loki narrowed his eyes and hummed deeply, probably not believing me. I nearly gulped as he examined me so closely and it didn’t help the situation between my legs at all. He made me crave for his touch just like a fish needed water. 

‘‘Naughty girl, you’re lying’‘ Loki noticed, which was good. Partly, I wanted to be caught. He seemed darker than usual, like he had anger inside of him and he hadn’t gotten anything good to think about in a while. I batted my eyelashes at him innocently, hoping he’d take this situation further.

‘‘If your mouth can’t be honest, I’ll better put it into good use’‘ He got an idea that made my body tingle from excitement. He had total control over me but I fucking loved it. He knew me so well and I knew him which made everything even better. ‘‘Are you sure? Someone can walk in’‘ I whispered and looked around the gigantic area. No one was to be seen.

‘‘Let them’‘ Loki replied sternly and then grabbed my hand, placing it on his hard crotch. My eyes widened as I felt how damn hard he was, almost like he could barely contain himself anymore. Imperceptibly, I bit my lower lip. His dick was pulsing and I felt it through the material of his clothes. ‘‘Poor thing’‘ I teased and gave him a light, playful squeeze.

Loki took a deep breath and grabbed my hair tightly. ‘’No teasing’’ He growled deeply, almost like he got even hornier. I was more than happy to help the king out. So I pushed his robe aside so I could get better access to him. I began to pull down his black pants and Loki helped me by shifting slightly. I pulled down the luxurious fabrics until I could free his hard member.

I almost cursed as I saw his dick right in front of my face. Loki had a really long dick with the perfect thickness. His tip was rosy red and there was pre-cum there, making me eager immediately. ‘’Open up’’ Loki demanded, snapping me out of my thoughts. My mouth was watering by now and I was more than happy to part my lips for him.

Loki led my face closer to him and I took the tip of his member into my mouth, slowly giving him a lick to collect the pre-cum. It tasted salty and bitter in my mouth. My hand grabbed his shaft and I took more of him inside, deciding to be a tease and take things slowly. I watched as his facial expressions changed from the stern one to a more joyful look. He inhaled a sharp breath as I circled my tongue around him, knowing exactly what he liked.

‘‘God, you are so pretty down there, my queen’‘ He rasped almost quietly but it encouraged me to make him feel good. I bobbed my head a few times so I could tease his sensitive tip but soon I wanted to go further. I pushed my head even closer to him and hollowed my cheeks, causing Loki to grunt out in pleasure. It was like music to my ears.

Loki pushed himself inside me, hitting the back of my throat each time. I breathed through my nose because my mouth was absolutely full by his enormous length. It was quite obvious he was a God like creature. He was beyond perfect.

I made sure to hollow my cheeks as he fucked my face harshly. I gagged a few times but I managed to take it. Drool began to collect at the edges of my mouth and it slid down my jaw. ‘’Mmhmm’’ I hummed as his cock was deep in my mouth. The vibrations were something Loki adored. His beautiful, pinkish lips parted and he gasped in pure pleasure. He looked amazing as he felt good.

Loki’s raven black hair got messy and a strand fell on his face beautifully. His blue-green eyes turned dark like a stormy sea and his skin was covered in a thin layer of sweat, giving him a slight glow. I pulled myself away from his cock but I yanked him off with his hand, rubbing my thumb on his tip each time I reached it. I could feel thick veins underneath my touch and the pulsating sensation as well.

‘‘I love your cock so much’‘ I admitted dirtily. Then I stuck out my tongue and dragged it along his veins. ‘‘Shit, Y/N’‘ Loki moaned harshly as he looked down, never taking his eyes off of me. I gave him a naughty look before licking his balls, knowing exactly how sensitive he was there. As my hand worked on his shaft, my mouth buried between his legs and I happily licked his most sensitive places. I kissed his shaft a few times, slowly climbing back up to his tip.

As I got to up, I took him into my mouth once again. Loki held onto my hair tightly and it hurt just the tiniest bit but I liked it. I jerked him off as I sucked his tip, whirling my tongue around him and moaning just to be extra. ‘’I’m close’’ Loki warned me, almost too loudly. I let him push my face as down as he could although it made me gag. It filled me with deep lust and excitement.

I bobbed my head with his help and I focused hard on pleasing him. His dick twitched a few times and that’s when I knew he was on the verge of spilling his load in my mouth. So I pulled my head away and took him to his edge by using my hands. I opened my mouth up wide.

‘‘Y/N- holy..’‘ Loki tried to speak but he couldn’t focus on his words. Suddenly his body tensed and the grip on me got harsher. Hot sperm flew out of him and I tried hard to catch it all in my mouth. Once again, I got a warm, salty taste in my mouth. Most of his cum landed on my tongue but some spurted on my face. I made sure to pump out each drop before I took my hand away.

I wiped the hot cum off my face with my thumb and sucked it off. Loki watched intensely as I swallowed everything, leaving nothing to waste. My jaw hurt a little bit but it was worth it. Loki was catching his breath as he was coming down his high. His cheeks got a little bit of color and he looked relieved.

‘‘Delicious’‘ I purred happily and popped my lips. Loki looked at me warmly for a while, almost happily. ‘‘Come here, darling’‘ He told me and helped me on his lap. I smiled gladly as I sat on his legs, wrapping mine around him. Then I rested my head against his as our noses touched lightly.

Loki was cool although he was sweaty. I thought he just wanted me here to sit but he had other thoughts. As I placed my lips on his, his hand traveled underneath my silky dress. My breath hitched in my throat as his skilled, long fingers touched my heat through my thin, soaked panties.

Loki broke our kiss so he could speak. ‘’My, my, is my queen aroused?’’ Loki chuckled quietly, his breath landing on my lips. My cheeks heated and I nodded, desperate for his touch that never left me disappointed.

He teased me by stroking his fingers against my slit. I gulped and realized I had to hold onto something. So I grabbed him by his shoulders and prepared myself for what was to come. He used his other hand to grab my jaw so I had to face him. The stern look was back on his ridiculously handsome face.

The next thing I knew was that he pushed my underwear aside and he pressed his fingers against my needy clit. A shiver ran down my spine and a wave of please hit me. Loki circled his fingers swiftly, making me melt for him. I struggled to keep quiet in here. After all, if I’d moan as loudly as in his bedroom, the entire castle would be filled with echo.

Loki used his magic and suddenly his fingertips were ice cold. The sensation of the cold meeting my hotness was blissful. I bit my lower lip harshly, drawing blood as I struggled to shut up. ‘’Don’t fight it’’ Loki whispered and I realized how darkly he was looking at me. His eyes had a shadow and his smile was vicious in a good way.

Out of the blue, Loki slid two of his long fingers inside me. That’s when I couldn’t control myself anymore. A loud moan left mouth and it echoed. My eyes widened and I tried to cover my mouth with my own hands, only to realize I couldn’t move them. Something was around my wrists. I glanced at my hands and saw handcuffs attached to chains. Loki had totally planned this!

His fingers felt incredible inside of me, rubbing against my wet walls with just the amount of pressure I craved and a little more. ‘’Oh, fuck Loki!’’ I whimpered out in awe, rocking my hips in the rhythm of his fingers. ‘’That’s right, say it again. Let everyone know who makes you feel this good’’ He growled with a raspy voice, suddenly eager to make me scream out his name.

I was in ecstasy as his fingers sunk inside of me and then pulled out, only to hit the sweet spot again and again. I attempted to drown my moans but Loki did everything in his power to make me moan as loudly as possible. A few whimpers escaped past my lips and I began to breathe sharply.

The pleasure he gave me was simply overwhelming. Loki curved his fingers inside me, only adding pressure to the spot I loved. I could feel my arousal soaking his entire hand and probably his pants as well. ‘’Oh my..’’ I gasped and gulped, happy to feel the knot in my stomach forming.

‘‘Come on dear, scream’‘ Loki whispered into my ear which caused goosebumps to appear all over my body. ‘‘It feels so good’‘ I moaned to him, wanting more but I was afraid I’d cause the guards to run inside in worry. I most certainly didn’t want to alarm anyone.

‘‘You’re close, I can feel it. You’re getting tighter’‘ Loki told me darkly. I nodded and cursed a few words underneath my breath. My brain was overpowered by the amazing feeling. As Loki finger fucked me on the throne, my wetness became evident. I could hear how much I needed him.

A smile appeared on my face as I thought about this. It was a very dirty and naughty thing to do, on the throne. But the rush it gave me was astonishing. ‘’Come on’’ Loki growled and added pressure, causing me to flinch. I squeezed his shoulders hard and gritted my teeth together.

His cold fingers hit my sweet spot hard, sending such a strong sense of pleasure through me and each time, he pushed me closer to the edge. After a few moments, I let go and felt as my orgasm approached me like a gift.

My walls clenched around his fingers and suddenly, I grew overly sensitive. My eyes rolled to the back of my head and I couldn’t think for a moment. ‘’Loki! Yes..oh fuck yes’’ I screamed out his name. He seemed pleased as he accomplished that and for a while, I didn’t mind at all. Loki pulled out his fingers but it didn’t stop there.

He rubbed my pulsing clit slowly, making my entire body tremble. I flinched a couple times and tears stung my eyes because it felt so fucking amazing. ‘’You’re so gorgeous when you cum’’ Loki let me know, his words messing with my brain ever more. I focused on his fingers that made me feel like a true Goddess.

He let me ride down my orgasm before he pulled back his fingers. Then he held me on his lap, allowing me to gather myself before he’d do anything else. A few warm tears rolled down my face but they were happy tears. Loki didn’t notice until I sniffled. It caught his attention quickly.

‘‘Are you alright?’‘ He pried seriously and made me face him. I cracked a smile and nodded. The powerful orgasm had knocked me over and I was exhausted. ‘‘I’m more than alright’‘ I giggled and that made him happy. ‘‘Good. I thought I had hurt you which would never be my intention’‘ He admitted quietly and petted my hair again. I loved this. Loki was never soft to others. He was rarely like this to me but these few moments always melted my heart.

*

Author’s Note: You’re welcome! I’m going to burn in hell for this but it’s worth it :)

choices stories explained badly

the freshman: become a grumpy old dude’s entertainment slave to get money for school where you’ll up liking it, then learn that anything that seems too good to be true (i.e. three people lowkey being in love with you at once) probably is and will evidently fall apart. oh and for some reason it’ll be your fault. it isn’t, everyone’s gonna blame you tho. but it’s cool, friendship prevails or whatever and everyone’s gay.

the sophomore: it’s the freshman except everyone looks like suburban middle-class parents now.

the rules of engagement: don’t marry cheating, lying scum bags who are predestined to be named something fratboy-esque like trent. marry hot men you meet on a cruise after three months of knowing them for money instead.

the crown and the flame: uniting divided kingdoms takes a lot of death and money, also you may or may not have some sexy times with the enemy’s son. the fire nation is the last surviving type of bender and bradley james turns into a dragon. avan jogia is hot and mysterious.

lovehacks: date men for work they said. it’ll be fun they said.

the royal romance: who needs a comfy life in new york maxwell i love you when you can have adventures maxwell why won’t you love me back in a far off country with a handsome maxwell prince? leave your life behind. leave your friends. it’s all good.

most wanted: murder, scandal, and revenge. you’re gonna ship massey and dave and there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it. and not to be that guy but where is book two. not to be shady but we’re moving on to the freshman: senior home and most wanted hasn’t even—

endless summer: you just came out here to have a good time and you’re literally being attacked right now. your entire life has been a lie and your gbf was stolen by sentient plants. you’ve sold your morals so that your fave would like you. why is tony stark so sketchy.

haunting of braidwood manor: you go on a haunted slumber party with a family of ghosts because you wanna help your ghost brother and oh hey, ghost girl is pretty cute. actually she’s really cute. the power of the lesbians has made ghost girl a normal girl again. this is my not-ghost girlfriend and we’re in love, thanks for your support best-male-bro-pal-who-i’m-not-interested-in-because-i’m-gay.

hero: everyone bullies you because you’re broke and don’t have the diamonds for this and that’s all we know so far

❂ ————– THE LION KING SENTENCE STARTERS.

’ What do you want me to do, dress in drag and do the hula? ’
’ I despise guessing games. ’
’ Oh, goody. ’
’ Yes. Well, forgive me for not leaping for joy. ’
’ When I’m King, what’ll that make you? ’
’ You’re so weird. ’
’ You have no idea. ’
’ Sing something with a little bounce in it. ’
’ I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts. ’
’ Big ones, small ones, some as big as your head… ’
’ Hakuna Matata. It’s our motto. ’
’ What’s a motto? ’
’ Nothing. What’s a motto with you? ’
’ Did I miss something? ’
’ Let me out! Let me out! ’
’ Please don’t eat me. ’
’ Whoa. Talk about your fixer-upper. ’
’ I can’t go back. What would it prove, anyway?  ’
’ You can’t change the past. ’
’ You said you’d always be there for me! But you’re not. ’
’ It’s because of me. It’s my fault. ’
’ Ahh, so you haven’t told them your little secret. ’
’ It’s not true. Tell me it’s not true. ’
’ No! It was an accident! ’
’ It’s your fault he’s/she’s dead. Do you deny it? ’
’ Then you’re guilty. ’
’ No, I’m not a murderer! ’
’ Friends? I thought he/she said we were the enemy. ’
’ Don’t ever do that again! Carnivores, ugh! ’
’ We’re pals, right? ’
’ I don’t wonder; I know. ’
’ The great kings of the past look down on us from those stars. ’
’ I always thought they were balls of gas burning billions of miles away. ’
’ Fireflies that, uh… got stuck up on that big bluish-black thing. ’
’ Everything the light touches is our kingdom. ’
’ A king’s time as ruler rises and falls like the sun. ’
’ What’s happened to you? ’
’ You’re right, I’m not. Now are you satisfied? ’
’ You know you’re starting to sound like my father. ’
’ The sooner we get to the waterhole, the sooner we can leave. ’
’ So where are we really going? ’
’ Right. So how are we going to ditch the dodo? ’
’ It’s a tradition going back generations. ’
’ Well, when I’m king, that’ll be the first thing to go. ’
’ Well, in that case, you’re fired. ’
’ Nice try, but only the king can do that. ’
’ Your Majesty. I gravel at your feet. ’
’ Why do I always have to save your… Ahhh! ’
’ I know what I have to do. ’
’ Temper, temper. ’
’ I’ve been running from it for so long. ’
’ Ow! Jeez, what was that for? ’
’ It doesn’t matter. It’s in the past. ’
’ Oh yes, the past can hurt. ’
’ But from the way I see it, you can either run from it, or… learn from it. ’
’ You see? So what are you going to do? ’
’ First, I’m gonna take your stick. ’
’ Good! Go on! Get out of here! ’
’ So you’d better have a good excuse for missing the ceremony this morning. ’
’ Perhaps you shouldn’t turn your back on me. ’
’ I wouldn’t dream of challenging you. ’
’ Is that a challenge? ’
’ I’m afraid I’m at the shallow end of the gene pool. ’
’ There’s one in every family sire. Two in mine, actually. ’
’ Pinned you again. ’
’ What’s going on? ’
’ Oh, dear, I’ve said too much! ’
’ Well, I’m brave. What’s out there? ’
’ All the more reason for me to be protective. ’
’ Well, I suppose you’d have found out sooner or later. ’
’ Just promise me you’ll never visit that dreadful place! ’
’ You run along now and have fun. ’
’ I wonder if its brains are still in there? ’
’ Danger? Hah! I walk on the wild side. I laugh in the face of danger. Ha ha ha ha! ’
’ Do you know what we do to kings who step out of their kingdom? ’
’ Puh. You can’t do anything to me. ’
’ Oh, my, my, my. Look at the sun. It’s time to go! ’
’ Hey! Why don’t you pick on somebody your own size? ’
’ I’m very disappointed in you. ’
’ You could have been killed! ’
’ You deliberately disobeyed me! ’
’ I was just trying to be brave like you. ’
’ I’m only brave when I have to be. ’
’ Being brave doesn’t mean you go looking for trouble. ’
’ Whoah. I guess even kings get scared, huh? ’
’ But you’re not scared of anything. ’
’ We were afraid it was somebody important. ’
’ Tell me about it. I just hear that name and I shudder. ’
’ Yeah, be prepared! We’ll be prepared… for what? ’
’ Long live the king! Long live the king! ’
’ If I told you, it wouldn’t be a surprise, now would it? ’
’ If you tell me, I’ll still act surprised. ’
’ You are such a naughty boy/girl! ’
’ You hear that? If you ever come back, we’ll kill ya! ’
’ So it is with a heavy heart that I assume the throne. ’
’ That’s the stupidest thing I ever heard. ’
’ You know, having a lion around might not be such a bad idea. ’
’ Ah, you’re an outcast! That’s great. So are we. ’
’ I’m telling you, kid: this is the great life. No rules, no responsibilities… ’
’ You mean a bunch of royal dead guys are watching us? ’
’ Come on, I just heard about this great place. ’
’ I’m surrounded by idiots. ’
’ I’m kinda in the middle of a bath. ’
’ So where are we going? It better not be anyplace dumb. ’
’ I’ll show you when we get there. ’
’ The waterhole? What’s so great about the waterhole? ’
’ You’re the king? And you never told us? ’
’ You don’t even know what I’ve been through! ’
’ I finally got some sense knocked into me. ’
’ Please have mercy, I beg you. ’
’ You don’t deserve to live. ’
’ Why should I believe you? Everything you ever told me was a lie. ’
’ This looks like a good spot to rustle up some grub. ’
’ I’ll make it up to you, I promise. ’
’ You got to put your past behind you. ’
’ When the world turns its back on you, you turn your back on the world. ’
’ Bad things happen, and you can’t do anything about it. ’
’ There’s more to being a king than getting your way all the time. ’
’ I’m so hungry I could eat a whole zebra. ’
’ Listen kid: if you live with us, you’re gonna have to eat like us. ’
’ Come on, will you cut it out? ’
’ I thought I knew, but now I’m not so sure. ’
’ What’s that supposed to mean, anyway? ’
’ I’m not the one who’s confused. ’
’ You don’t even know who you are! ’
’ This is just the way your father looked before he died. ’
’ So what’s the plan for getting past those guys? ’
’ No wonder we’re dangling at the bottom of the food chain! ’
’ Where is your hunting party? They’re not doing their job. ’
’ Then you have sentenced us to death! ’
’ Well, it sure is a surprise to see you… ’
’ Hakuna Matata. It means “no worries”. ’
’ These are rare delicacies. ’
’ You have forgotten who you are and so have forgotten me. ’
’ You are more than what you have become. ’
’ How can I go back? I’m not who I used to be. ’
’ Will you stop following me? Who are you? ’
’ What’s going on here? Who’s the monkey? ’
Okay Hufflepuff Rant coming through

So, I see so much stuff about Hufflepuffs being cuddly and nice and sweet, and it’s great, because they’re not wrong.

We’re sweet, we like to do nice things for people, it makes us feel good inside. We love to cuddle and snuggle up with people, we love big sweaters and fluffy blankets.

We love to bake and we love sharing what we make with others. We get emotional easily, we put others before ourselves. We love sunshine and sugar and everything nice, it’s true. But that’s not all we are.

We are determined, if we want something, we work for it, even if it’s hard or painful. If it’s worth it we’re in it until we get what we want, or because it’s the right thing to do.

We are stubborn, we don’t like being told what to do. We do things our way, or grudgingly, and trust me we can hold a grudge. If you piss us off we arent just agitated we are royally pissed, like, Ashley-Ketchadorian-you-were-supposed-to-be-watching-the-door pissed.

We swear like sailors, not around family or little kids, but by ourselves or around friends, you better fucking believe we’re going to say whatever tumbles out of our mouths.

We love our friends and accept and comfort them, but if they do something completely stupid, you better believe we’re going to chew them out for it.

Snappy comebacks, good Lord here’s one nobody ever adds. Most people think it might be the slytherins with a quick tongue, or the clever ravenclaws, but oh no, no no no it’s us, the Hufflepuffs. Not even a second to actually think before words come flying out of our mouths. Whether to add to a witty conversation or to bicker with someone, Hufflepuffs will surprise you with this one.

Another thing, there’s also a lot about how sweet Hufflepuffs are, but when they get mad, they get mad, as I mentioned briefly above. But to add to that thought, Hufflepuffs don’t just get mad, Hufflepuffs will verbally d e s t r o y you, if you give them a reason.

So yeah, we bake and we loves cats, good God we love cats, and we love everything and everyone, but we are a lot more than that too.

Have a nice night everyone. :)

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don’t care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let’s shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can’t. I’ll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I’m excited. Here’s the graduate. We’re very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B’s. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That’s me! - Wave to us! We’ll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I’d make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I’m glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I’m not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don’t waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That’s why we don’t need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp… under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of… …9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it’s just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it’ll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as… Honey! - That girl was hot. - She’s my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we’re all cousins. - Right. You’re right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it’s done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you’ll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn’t know that. What’s the difference? You’ll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven’t had one day off in 27 million years. So you’ll just work us to death? We’ll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! “What’s the difference?” How can you say that? One job forever? That’s an insane choice to have to make. I’m relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We’re bees. We’re the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don’t know. But you know what I’m talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I’ve never seen them this close. They know what it’s like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don’t come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You’re monsters! You’re sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don’t know. Their day’s not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That’s more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It’s just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you’re wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren’t they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let’s have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I’d knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn’t it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We’re hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you’re not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We’re going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you’re interested in? - Well, there’s a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It’s a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn’t right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That’s a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son’s not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I’m not trying to be funny. You’re not funny! You’re going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You’re gonna be a stirrer? - No one’s listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I’m gonna get an ant tattoo! Let’s open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I’ll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody “dawg”! I’m so proud. - We’re starting work today! - Today’s the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal… - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them’s yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What’d you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What’s available? Restroom attendant’s open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you’re on. I’m sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey’s always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He’s dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That’s life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should… Barry? Barry! All right, we’ve got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine… What happened to you? Where are you? - I’m going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You’re gonna die! You’re crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone’s feeling brave, there’s a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn’t that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck’s restricted. It’s OK, Lou. We’re gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy’s in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That’s awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let’s move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I’m out! I can’t believe I’m out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It’s got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It’s a little bit of magic. That’s amazing. Why do we do that? That’s pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I’m picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don’t we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You’re reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don’t know, but I’m loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It’s a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama’s little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don’t think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you’re about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There’s a bee in the car! - Do something! - I’m driving! - Hi, bee. - He’s back here! He’s going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don’t move, he won’t sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow… the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan’t fly in rain. Oan’t fly in rain. Oan’t fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don’t need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This… Drapes! That is diabolical. It’s fantastic. It’s got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What’s number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don’t go for that… …kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn’t talk to them. They’re out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they’re flabbergasted, can’t believe what I say. There’s the sun. Maybe that’s a way out. I don’t remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don’t kill him! You know I’m allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I’m just saying all life has value. You don’t know what he’s capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I’m not scared of him. It’s an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It’s a bee law. You’re not supposed to talk to a human. I can’t believe I’m doing this. I’ve got to. Oh, I can’t do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can’t. How should I start it? “You like jazz?” No, that’s no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I’m sorry. - You’re talking. - Yes, I know. You’re talking! I’m so sorry. No, it’s OK. It’s fine. I know I’m dreaming. But I don’t recall going to bed. Well, I’m sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you’re a bee! I am. And I’m not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn’t for you… I had to thank you. It’s just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I’m talking with a bee. - Yeah. I’m talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I’m grateful. I’ll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. “Mama, Dada, honey.” You pick it up. - That’s very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn’t laugh, we’d cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway… Oan I… …get you something? - Like what? I don’t know. I mean… I don’t know. Ooffee? I don’t want to put you out. It’s no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It’s just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don’t be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn’t. - Have some. - No, I can’t. - Oome on! I’m trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don’t help. You look great! I don’t know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He’s making the tie in the cab as they’re flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, “Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?” Is that a bee joke? That’s the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don’t know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can’t do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look… There’s my hive right there. See it? You’re in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I’m right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It’s like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I’ll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it’s no trouble. Sorry I couldn’t finish it. If I did, I’d be up the rest of my life. Are you…? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then… I guess I’ll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again… for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but… Anyway… This can’t possibly work. He’s all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can’t believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don’t. - How’d you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I’m glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your “experience.” Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well… - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I’m not attracted to spiders. I know it’s the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can’t get by that face. So who is she? She’s… human. No, no. That’s a bee law. You wouldn’t break a bee law. - Her name’s Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She’s so nice. And she’s a florist! Oh, no! You’re dating a human florist! We’re not dating. You’re flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin’ stripey! And that’s not what they eat. That’s what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It’s bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up… Sit down! …really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We’re us. There’s us and there’s them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There’s no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He’s in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It’s been three days! Why aren’t you working? I’ve got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You’re barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father’s talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I’m talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I’ll catch up. Don’t be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We’re still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn’t respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don’t listen! I’m not listening to this. Sorry, I’ve gotta go. - Where are you going? - I’m meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can’t decide? Bye. I just hope she’s Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that’s every florist’s dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I’ve got one. How come you don’t fly everywhere? It’s exhausting. Why don’t you run everywhere? It’s faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That’s insane! You don’t have that? We have Hivo, but it’s a disease. It’s a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It’s usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It’s a bug. He’s not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic ‘N’ Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You’ve really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I’ll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don’t have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it’s hard to make it! There’s heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It’s organic. - It’s our-ganic! It’s just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don’t know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You’ve taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it’s on sale?! I’m getting to the bottom of this. I’m getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I’ll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You’re busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you’ll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who’s your supplier? I don’t understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You’re too late! It’s ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they’re on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You’re not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I’m going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I’m going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It’s your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I’m Oarl Kasell. But don’t kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they’re getting it. I mean, that honey’s ours. - Bees hang tight. - We’re all jammed in. It’s a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you’re out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don’t want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood’s about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I’d catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it’s pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee’s got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That’s the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. “They make the honey, and we make the money”? Oh, my! What’s going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn’t last too long. Do you know you’re in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That’s a man in women’s clothes! That’s a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There’s hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That’s a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That’s a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He’s been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn’t stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it’s true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That’s a killer. There’s only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive’s only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I’m Bob Bumble. - And I’m Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we’ll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we’re talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, “I’m a kid from the hive. I can’t do this”? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I’m from, we’d never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It’s a common name. Next week… He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots… Next week… Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They’re scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She’s 81. Honey, her backhand’s a joke! I’m not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I’m helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we’re really busy working. But it’s our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting… - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you’re three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that’s had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit’s a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I’m done with the humans, they won’t be able to say, “Honey, I’m home,” without paying a royalty! It’s an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It’s pretty big, isn’t it? I can’t believe how many humans don’t work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What’s the matter? - I don’t know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn’t the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you’re representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson… you’re representing all the bees of the world? I’m kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we’re ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man’s divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn’t some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there’s no trickery here. I’m just an ordinary bee. Honey’s pretty important to me. It’s important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we’re the little guys! I’m hoping that, after this is all over, you’ll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he’d dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don’t imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn’t hear you. - No. - No. Because you don’t free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They’re very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How’d you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that’s enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you’ve never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven’t. No, you haven’t. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I’m feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say… Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That’s not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you’re devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that’s ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn’t. But is this what it’s come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don’t have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn’t a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn’t someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You’re all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury’s on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I’m a florist. Right. Well, here’s to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn’t think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but… the battery. I didn’t want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There’s a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you’re quite a tennis player. I’m not much for the game myself. The ball’s a little grabby. That’s where I usually sit. Right… there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn’t really a special skill. You think I don’t see what you’re doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That’s just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I’m going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I’ve just about had it with your little mind games. - What’s that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that’s a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can’t seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I’m wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I’ve got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You’re bluffing. - Am I? Surf’s up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don’t even like honey! I don’t eat it! We need to talk! He’s just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I’ve met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you’re one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night… My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I’m sorry about all that. I know it’s got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn’t overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he’s considered one of the best lawyers… Yeah. Layton, you’ve gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it’s gonna be all over. Don’t worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don’t like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I’ll ask you what I think we’d all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We’re friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute… Are you her little… …bedbug? I’ve seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn’t your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but… - So those aren’t your real parents! - Oh, Barry… - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You’re an illegitimate bee, aren’t you, Benson? He’s denouncing bees! Don’t y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I’m going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don’t! It’s what he wants! Oh, I’m hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can’t treat them like equals! They’re striped savages! Stinging’s the only thing they know! It’s their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can’t feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I… I blew the whole case, didn’t I? It doesn’t matter. What matters is you’re alive. You could have died. I’d be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there’s a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can’t explain it. It was all… All adrenaline and then… and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I’m sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We’re just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don’t know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn’t sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don’t check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don’t smoke. Right. Bees don’t smoke. Bees don’t smoke! But some bees are smoking. That’s it! That’s our case! It is? It’s not over? Get dressed. I’ve gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you’ve done step correctly, you’re ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it’s interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don’t make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about… Your Honor, haven’t these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court’s valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I’m afraid I’m going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery’s motion. But you can’t! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It’s a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn’t hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, “Smoking or non?” Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He’s playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I’m OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won’t have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You’ll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery’s right? - What do you mean? We’ve been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we’ll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We’re all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He’ll have nauseous for a few hours, then he’ll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames… But it’s just a prance-about stage name! …unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan’t breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there’s gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We’ve never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We’re shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn’t believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What’s going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They’re home. They don’t know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn’t? It’s the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now… Now I can’t. I don’t understand why they’re not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They’re doing nothing. It’s amazing. Honey really changes people. You don’t have any idea what’s going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They’re all wilting. Doesn’t look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I’m gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn’t think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It’s notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That’s our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course… The human species? So if there’s no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn’t it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I’ll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry… sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They’ve moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It’s the last chance I’ll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I’m sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can’t do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That’s why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I’ve ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I’ve made it worse. Actually, it’s completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it’s greater than my previous ideas combined. I don’t want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they’ve got back here with what we’ve got. - Bees. - Park. - Pollen! - Flowers. - Repollination! - Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia. They’ve got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It’s real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. - Where should I sit? - What are you? - I believe I’m the pea. - The pea? It goes under the mattresses. - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I’m getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let’s see what this baby’ll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic… …without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there’s no stopping us. Stop! Security. - You and your insect pack your float? - Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? - Remove your stinger. - It’s part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we’re lucky, we’ll have just enough pollen to do the job. Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It’s got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we’ll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They’ll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I’d like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Oaptain, I’m in a real situation. - What’d you say, Hal? - Nothing. Bee! Don’t freak out! My entire species… What are you doing? - Wait a minute! I’m an attorney! - Who’s an attorney? Don’t move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One’s bald, one’s in a boat, they’re both unconscious! - Is that another bee joke? - No! No one’s flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What’s your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I’m a florist from New York. Where’s the pilot? He’s unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. - Who’s that? - Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It’s got giant wings, huge engines. I can’t fly a plane. - Why not? Isn’t John Travolta a pilot? - Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We’re headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory… That’s Barry! …is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There’s a bee on that plane. I’m quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They’ve done enough damage. But isn’t he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn’t be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small… Haven’t we heard this a million times? “The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense.” - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We’re going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That’s why I want to get bees back to working together. That’s the bee way! We’re not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. - Hover? - Forget hover. This isn’t so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. - That may have been helping me. - And now we’re not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let’s get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I’d do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don’t have to yell. I’m not yelling! We’re in a lot of trouble. It’s very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It’s not a tone. I’m panicking! I can’t do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it’s my turn. How is the plane flying? I don’t know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow. - Hello. All right, let’s drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can’t see anything. Oan you? No, nothing. It’s all cloudy. Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry. - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I’m feeling something. - What? - I don’t know. It’s strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK. Out the engines. We’re going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That’s it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one? - That flower. - I’m aiming at the flower! That’s a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. - This is insane, Barry! - This’s the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don’t be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Oome on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! - Yes. No high-five! - Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! - Thank you. - But we’re not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We’re the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we’re gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains? We’re bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You’ve earned this. Yeah! I’m a Pollen Jock! And it’s a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That’s our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now’s the time. I got a feeling we’ll be working late tonight! Here’s your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who’s next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don’t forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it’s all me. And I don’t see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I’m sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I’m late. He’s a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can’t get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You’re a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who’s next? All right, scramble, jocks! It’s time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it. Let’s just stop for a second. Hold it. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, everyone.Can we stop here? I’m not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that
—  The Bee Movie
Robb x Targaryen!Reader...

((I hope you all like! Might have gotten a little wordy! ALSO, anon, sorry I couldn’t find a way to add smut!))

Word Count: 2,218

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He sat at the long table between his siblings and his mother. All six were true Starks, watching you with cold gazes that gave nothing away.

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