you and all your friends are dead

anonymous asked:

Season 3 of Flash has been such a disappointment even that finale was underwhelming and everything they do is so predictable I hope next season is better

Agreed. I hear they’re getting some new writers, which can either be good or bad lol but hopefully it’s good. I just want the Season 1 vibe to be back. I miss the happier and lighter show. The show that focused on superhero stuff and fighting instead of soap opera relationship nonsense. 

There’s been a lot of problems with the flash this season but that’s been the biggest problem. Too much focus on relationships, all of them being written horribly, not getting much of the friendships at all and not seeing the team getting to spend time together and hang out like they used to.

Unfortunately the worst part of the season has been Barry. And I love Barry with all of my heart, he’s been my favorite character for a long long time. But Flashpoint happened and then it was like Barry completely changed. (I like to pretend it’s Barry’s evil twin Larry because I really don’t recognize him at all) He was completely selfish, he didn’t care about anyone but Iris. We didn’t even get to see him interact with many characters alone besides Iris. He has such a great connection with every character and we missed seeing that. I get that Iris would be his top priority, there’s no question about that. But to act like everyone else doesn’t matter as much and do things that threaten their safety or take away their happiness? Not the Barry we know and love. He didn’t care about Caitlin’s powers at all, selfishly making her use them when he knew how dangerous it was. He let Wally get taken by the speedforce without giving it a second glance. Cisco’s brother dies in Flashpoint and he does nothing about it but goes back in time the second he thinks it could possibly save Iris. He makes Julian talk to him through Savitar even when he said multiple times he didn’t want to. And it was all just for him and his own happiness. Never would I thought the motto of the season would be what Killer Frost said in episode 7 “You get your happy ending everyone else be damned” because that’s literally how he acted the whole time. 

This whole storyline with Iris’ impending death was the thing that really fucked it up. In the beginning of Season 3, things were going well and we saw everyone getting their own storyline, having stuff going on and everything was balanced. Then suddenly this happened and it was all about Barry and his relationship with Iris because she was going to die. Meanwhile we all knew they’d never kill her which makes the storyline a waste to begin with. Everyone else besides Caitlin really who had her Killer Frost arc became like background characters. And honestly, I wouldn’t have minded this storyline if it was actually about IRIS. If we saw her making the most of her last months, having a part in saving her life, being “badass” like we were told she would be. Being the hot shot journalist she supposedly is but we never see. But no. Instead it was about Barry like always and their relationship instead of about her. 

Then the small things they did on the side like Savitar and Killer Frost didn’t get enough focus at all. We didn’t learn anything about why Caitlin became Killer Frost, why the evil inside of her overpowered. Why was she working with Savitar? How was she so “Caitlin” like at the end of the finale out of the blue? What were her motives this whole time? And I bet we won’t ever get these answers. I can only hope we’ll see her finding herself like she wants to do but I don’t have high hopes. And for Savitar, we didn’t get much background about him at all either. 

Then poor HR dies for no good reason whatsoever and what does Barry do? He works with Savitar, the guy who killed him as if it was no big deal. You bet your ass he wouldn’t have thought about doing that if Iris was the one dead like Savitar planned on. It was so ridiculous to see Barry and even Iris try to reason with this guy when he was hellbent on killing Iris and then ends up killing one of their friends anyway. Again, this show is losing the superhero/battle aspect and turning into this emotional cheese fest. 

So yeah, in general this season wasn’t great at all and I can only hope that they’ll start fixing things for the better next season. Honestly with that finale I have no desire to even continue watching but I will anyways (mainly for Grant and to see Caitlin finding herself and what’s next for her.) 

Blood Money BTS | part 4

Pairing: unknown

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 (part 5 next Wednesday 9:00 central timezone)

Originally posted by tearsavi

Opening the door to your apartment with the spare key you walked into a kitchen that still had a cup of water on the table. Magazines were on the counter and you saw your flowers still on a shelf with your worn books. Smiling you walked into your room, turning on the string lights that were strung up all around. Your eyes were met with the sparkling lights, Polaroid pictures of you and your friends, of places were immediately illuminated. Your desk still held your computer and you could still see some clothes around the floor. A knocking on your door surprised you, what surprised you more was that it was Irene.

“Where have you been girl?!” she says, walking in, “I came by a couple of days ago and there was no answer! I haven’t seen you since that nightclub shooting I thought you were dead. But the police never reported a dead girl your age. I was so worried y’know!” she scolded.

“I know sorry,” you smiled sheepishly, “I was super busy I had a shift to catch at the hospital then I met up with my brother and spent some time with him for awhile.” you lied, but not completely. You did meet up with your brother, just not in the context she was thinking.

“But you never answered my texts or calls!” she pouted, you just laughed thinking of a quick response.

“Sorry! My phone broke, remember the shooting?” you said, it was amazing how easily you could lie.

“Oh, do you wanna get another one?” she paused, “we can go out today!”

“Sorry! I have another shift to catch in five and a half hours, I just wanna chill at home you can come in though!” you stepped back to let her in. Closing the door behind her you went to make a pot of coffee. Soon the aroma filled the house and you poured yourself and her a cup.

“So, how was it with your brother back in Daegu?” Irene asked, “Did his hot friends show up?”

“Irene!” you scolded lightly slapping her shoulder, she just giggled, “You have a boyfriend mind you!”

“I know but that doesn’t mean I still can’t look at the menu!” she shot back, you just rolled your eyes before setting your coffee down. “I’m gonna take a shower.” you called before entering the bathroom.

“Okay!” she said before setting her cup of coffee down. Sighing you got into the shower wishing the water could wash away your worries. Little did you know that your best friend wasn’t well, such a good friend. “Sorry y/n.” Irene murmured before quickly walking into your room to your laptop. Fingers hitting the key she pulled up your brothers name, looking at him she nodded to herself. Looking around she couldn’t see that brown leather journal you wrote in though, “Damn it y/n.” she muttered, sighing she looked in your closet, all of your clothes were gone except for a couple of garments strewn around your room. “Look’s like you did more than visit your brother.” she murmured before taking pictures on her phone. “It looks like you’ve moved out, I wonder where you’re staying.”

“What are you doing?” you asked opening the door to reveal your friend taking pictures of your room.

“O-oh, sorry I was going to redo my room and was taking some ideas.” she laughed nervously, you narrowed your eyes before shrugging it off.

“Whateve’s, It’s time for you to go anyways.” you said smiling and leading her out of your apartment. “Byeee!” you said before shutting her out.

“Bye!” Irene said faking enthusiasm before turning away to swipe at the suspicious pictures she took. “Mark’s not going to be happy about this…” she murmured unaware that you were watching her from the peep hole.

“Who’s Mark?” you whispered before sighing and getting ready to take your shift at the hospital.

“Hey y/n!” Yugyeom said as you entered the hospital,

“Hey Yeomie!” you said cheerfully, “how are you?”

“I’m great it’s you i’m worried about.” he said furrowing his eyebrows.

“Why?” You asked,

“You’ve looked really tired these past few days….” he trailed off

“Well yeah, I intern here and get like no sleep of course i’m gonna look tired Yugyeomie.” you pointed out before the head of your group called you over to get working. “Bye!”


“Hey! Seokjin,” Namjoon called over, “come here I have something!”

“What?” Jin asked walking to where Namjoon stood in the parking lot.

“Look,” Hoseok pointed to a tall man with brown hair wearing an expensive looking business suit. “That’s gonna be our next target.”

“Him?” he asked, they just nodded. “How are we gonna get him?”

“That’s Taehyung’s job with the rookie, apparently our friend here likes fresh meat every couple of nights.” Namjoon muttured,

“You don’t mean….” Jin started, they all just nodded. “No, no we’re not getting my sister to seduce and sleep with him Namjoon what if something goes wrong?”

“It won’t, she won’t even sleep with him all she has to do is lead him away from the bar in a couple of days Taehyung will take it from there.” Hoseok reasoned, “it’s not that bad I promise!” Jin frowned but relented for now.

“Fine, but if she’s not ready then-” he started but Namjoon just held up a hand.

“I know I know. Don’t worry princess.” he said before all three of them crept away.


“Where is he?” you muttered wrapping your coat closer as if you could keep the heat in.

“Hey, you get me today!” Namjoon said but his look was not kind. Rolling your eyes you sighed.

“I’d rather walk.” you hissed before opening the door begrudgingly. “But it’s cold out there so hey, yay?”

Namjoon drove away, but something in the rearview mirror caught his eye. Yugyeom.

“Who’s that?” he asked motioning to him,

“Oh him? That’s another intern at the hospital his name is Yugyeom. Why?” you looked back, but he was gone.

“Nothing never mind.” he said, “So what makes you think you can just come and go as you please from the base huh? Did it ever occur to you that maybe you were a prisoner?” he asked, you just rolled your eyes again,

“I don’t care, really you can keep me there but nothing’s going to stop me from finishing my internship. I advise you too Namjoon to let me because when I’m done it’ll benefit you more than you realize.” you shrugged before closing your eyes and drifting off to sleep.

“Damn she’s not wrong….” he muttered gripping the steering wheel so hard his knuckles turned white.

Blinking you opened your eyes to the soft gray of your room, groaning you rolled off your bed and took a shower before walking down to the kitchen.

“Hey y/n!” Taehyung called before giving you a tray of food, “Go give this to our Jungkookie and check up on him it’s been around a month since he’s been confined to his room, he’s getting antsy. Especially because we have a lot to do soon.”

“Fine, wait what are we doing?” you asked, pausing at the doorway.

“Well more like what are you doing.” Taehyung sang before going back to making pancakes.

“Ugh fine, don’t tell me then.” you pouted walking away to Jungkook’s room. “Ya! Kook I have your breakfast get up!” you shouted before opening the door to find him curled up under a bunch of fluffy blankets. Setting the tray down on his desk you crept up to him and carefully peeled back the blankets to reveal his sleeping face. “Aish, you look so cute sleeping like this.” you whispered leaning in a little more to inspect a small scar on his cheek. Slowly, you reached out a single finger to lightly trace it when he suddenly grabbed your wrist.

“So do you always touch sleeping boys or is it just me?” he asked cracking open and eye and blinking at you. You opened your mouth to say something but nothing came out.

“What?! No!” you finally managed to get out, but Jungkook just smirked.

“So it’s just me huh?” he drawled out lazily, finally yanking your hand out of his grip you grabbed his food tray.

“H-here’s your food.” you muttered before patting his head, “But first I need to inspect your wound, c’mon you know the drill Kooks.” you said sitting down next to him.

“I know I know you want to see me strip.” he waggled his eyebrows playfully as you rolled your eyes. Carefully you undid his bandages to reveal that it was time to take the stitches out.

“Okay, carefully we’re gonna walk down to the kitchen just a minute,” you paused before shouting “JIMIN!”

“Yeas?” he asked popping his head into the room,

“Can you go to my room and on my floor near the bed is a bag with some medical supplies bring it to the kitchen would you?” you asked, he just nodded.

“Wow ever so obedient.” Jungkook remarked before slowly getting up.

“Easy there pony,” you said putting an arm around his waist to steady him, opening the door you led him out and down the stairs to the kitchen where Jimin was patiently waiting. “Okay Jungkook let’s have you sit on the counter.” you instructed as he laid down. “Jimin can you hand me the small surgical scissors?” you asked before feeling Jimin hand them to you. “Okay.” you murmured to yourself before gently easing the blade under the stitches and clipping them.

“Oh y/n! What are you doing here?” Hoseok asked walking in because Taehyung was making some bombass pancakes.

“She’s finally taking out my stitches!” Jungkook said before you told him to stop talking.

“Okay….” you hummed before setting the scissors down and getting tweezers to take out the stitches. “You’ll feel some discomfort but don’t worry I know what I’m doing…..probably.” you laughed to yourself before yanking the black string ever so lightly.

“Here’s a warm rag to wipe away anything.” Jimin offered which you took gratefully and wiped away some of the pus and blood.

“Okay, so it’s not a fatal wound though but it’ll be tender and there’s some bleeding still because it’s not fully healed but you’ll be fine.” you smiled and cleaned up before bandaging it some.

“Thanks! Does that mean I can go out now?” Jungkook asked eagerly.

“Woah there don’t get ahead of yourself Kookie.” you said laughing,

“What did you call me?” he asked raising an eyebrow, you froze realizing your slip up with a cute nickname.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You responded suddenly very fixated on stirring the batter.

“Oh no you don’t I heard you call me Kookie…..is that a pet name y/n?” Jungkook said suddenly putting his hands on your waist. “Do you want me to call you something cute too?” he smirked feeling you tense up.

“Ya!” you were about to spin around when you heard a screech of a car pull in and some yelling for help.

“We’re going to talk about this you’re not escaping the embarrassment y/n!” Jungkook called as you ran up the stairs.

“Oh thank god you’re here y/n I didn’t know what we’d do if you were taking a shift at the hospital!” Jin called as you turned into the kitchen.

“What in the world happened to him?” you asked pointing to Namjoon and Yoongi.

“Deal went bad.” Yoongi muttered, he wasn’t as bad as Namjoon who was panting having been shot at. “Help him first.” he pointed at Namjoon when you went to help his cuts. Nodding you led Namjoon over to the kitchen counter.

“Here,” Jimin panted, “I brought you your med stuff along with some sterilizer.”

“Thanks Jiminie.” you said before getting to work grabbing the tweezers. “I have to get the bullet out first.” you told Namjoon, “This is gonna hurt but you’ll feel better I promise.” Then, you leaned forward and used the tweezers to fish around for the bullet in his abdomen.

“What in the hell happened?!” Jungkook yelled Taehyung quickly following as they walked into the kitchen.

“I told y/n, the deal went bad. Exo and their little maknae’s started shooting at us as soon as our guard was down those fuckers.” Yoongi cursed, glaring at a wall.

“Gotcha!” you smiled before pulling a bullet out. Grabbing a warm cloth you wiped away the blood and peered into the hole. Then nodding to yourself you cut open Namjoon’s shirt, you stared at his chest, he had some scarring across it but other than that he was very fit. He just raised an eyebrow,

“Like what you see sweetheart?” he asked smirking.

“If you can crack jokes like that then you should focus on not moving. You’re very lucky that the bullet didn’t hit any organs Namjoon.” you said before cleaning out the wound.

“What would have happened if the bullet did hit an organ?” Jin asked,

“Most likely he’d die.” you said making the room go quiet.

“You wouldn’t be able to help him?” Taehyung asked,

“No, I not only don’t have the resources here nor the expertise for that. Plus infection would probably kill him. Either way he’d have to go to the hospital which would result in prison.” you stated before finishing up. “Take him to a room on this floor, He’s not going to be able to do anything for a while I’ll stay up here and take care of his health. Yoongi c’mere I have to look at you.” then you had Yoongi scoot over and you wiped and cleaned his wounds. “You don’t need stitches but get him some advil he’s going to be in some pain and drink some water for god’s sake you’re dehydrated.” you scolded lightly smacking his shoulder before shooing them away from the kitchen and cleaning up your space. “Oh, Jin!” you called,

“Yes? Did you want anything y/n?” he asked

“If you guys plan on keeping me here then I’m gonna need my own work space. You all have yours, I want mine with supplies and everything.” you said before pouring a glass of water and walking to Namjoon’s room.

“On it ma’am.” he whispered before walking downstairs.

“Drink this in a couple of hours. Not now because we want to let your body heal.” you said before sitting down on the ground.

“Okay,” Namjoon paused, “Are you really okay with, this?”

“Okay with what?” you asked,

“Y’know, having to join our gang, although I guess it’s better since your older brother is also here….”

You paused, “Do I look like i’m okay with this?” you asked,

“To be honest, you seem to not really care.” Namjoon said,

“Well i’m not, maybe it’s the shock but i’m panicking internally.” pausing you looked out the window, “Although I guess i’m okay as long as you let me go to my shifts to get my med degree….”

“Ah, yes you seem to really want that.”

“I’ve worked for it my whole life.” you pointed out,

“True, we used to listen to Seokjin ramble on about how accomplished his younger sister was. He was so proud of you y/n.” Namjoon said,

“Hey, can I live up in the actual house?” you asked,

“Why? It’s safer down there.” he pointed out,

“I now I just, like the house better…” you sighed,

“Sure I guess.” He said before shaking his head,

“Well I’m gonna go then and let you rest. Bye.” you said before quietly leaving.

Walking down the stairs you found all the boys in the kitchen eating pancakes, Yoongi wrestling with Hoseok laughing.

“YAH!” you shouted immediately when you saw him, Yoongi froze mid headlock staring at you like a deer in the headlights. “What do you think you’re doing?” you asked putting your hands on your hips,

“Um, showing some affection?” he tried, you stared at him dead in the eye. “I’ll go um, sit down and rest.” he whispered before slowly walking to the couch and taking a seat next to Jin. “You’re sisters kinda scary.” he whispered, Jin just laughed,

“I know man I know. She used to scold me all the time for not washing the dishes, but hey she’s watching out for you you’re a wounded man Min Yoongi!” Seokjin paused catching you staring at Yoongi with something that resembled affection in your eyes, “If I didn’t know better I’d think that’s her way of showing affection for you, she might like you!” Jin whispered before laughing at Yoongi’s shocked face, “Or not?” when he noticed Yoongi’s face was flushed red. “Hmmm.” he hummed knowing Yoongi’s secret,

“Namjoon’s out of commission for at least two to three weeks so I suggest very highly that you all lay low for a while.” you said, looking around as they nodded.

“If he’s gonna be that hurt we should go back to the main base then.” Hoseok told everyone,

“Main base?” you asked,

“Yeah, you didn’t actually think that this was where we did our work?” he responded shock on his face, “Oh no this place is much to small and surrounded by people. Our main base is much bigger and surrounded by mountains where we can really function. That’s why this place was so understocked when you got here, we don’t usually use this but with you here we thought it’d be better for awhile.” he explained, you nodding before sighing.

“Plus we’re the only ones who know where the main base is, as you’ve noticed some other guys keep coming and going, they don’t know where the actual headquarters are. Safety purposes.” Taehyung said, you just nodded.

“So when do we leave?” you asked,

“As soon as Namjoon can walk.” Yoongi said eyes closed,

“Then about a couple days or so.” you said to yourself before nodding.

“Oh!” Seokjin said, “Back at headquarters we’ll have a med bay for you to do your work!” he smiled, you just nodded.

“So…” Jungkook said, “Kookie huh?”

“Don’t.” you held a hand up,

“Awww c’mon baby! It was a cute name!” he said smirking,

“Excuse m-baby?!” you almost shrieked,

“Well you called me Kookie so I decided to come up with a name for you too!” he grinned,

“Oh my god.” you whispered before rolling your eyes and grabbing Jimin by the arm, “C’mon let’s wrestle.” you said walking toward the other end of the room where you practice.

“What?!” everyone said, staring at you,

“What?” you asked,

“You never wanna wrestle, ever.” Taehyung said,

“Well here I am so,” you shrugged before you were flattened on your back.

“You said you wanted to wrestle so c’mon stop yapping!” Jimin said playfully. Eye twitching you stood back up before lunging to punch him in the stomach, he laughed and dodged before punching you again, quickly you grabbed Jungkook’s switchblade laying on the counter and opened it with a flick of your wrist.

“No weapons!” Jimin said eyes widening, “Do you even know how to use that thing?”

“Wait I wanna see her fight with a weapon she’s never fought with one before!” Taehyung said, everyone was intrigued now,

“I know stupid I’m the one that was supposed to train her! But all we’ve been working on was hand to hand!” Sighing Jimin shook his head, “Just don’t hurt yourself man.” before he opened his blade. Smirking Yoongi laughed internally because you were a fast learner. He was you watching Jimin whenever he practiced fighting with Jungkook and caught you practicing by yourself late at night alone with a spare blade, sometimes he’d even join you. Jimin swiped his blade but was shocked when  you dodged under and cut him down his arm before jumping away, “What the-?” he asked before grabbing your arm and cutting your cheek,

“She’s a quick one Jimin!” Jungkook yelled, laughing.

“I know!” he snapped grabbing your leg when you tried to kick him. “Ha! Got you now!” he gloated but you just smirked,

“Jimin watch out!” Taehyung yelled when you suddenly jumped up and twisted around with your other leg just barely missing him when he let go and retreated. Tossing the blade to your other hand you swept his legs from under him and jumped on top straddling him with the knife at his throat. Suddenly he hit your knee knocking you off balance and reversed the situation,

“I win again!” he laughed before helping you up, “You’ve gotten much better though your form is just fantastic! Although how’d you learn to fight with a knife?” he asked,

“I watched you fight Jungkook then practiced on my own.” you shrugged before tossing the knife back to Jungkook, “Here Kooks take back the knife.” you said before sipping some water. 

Everyone just shook their head at you while Yoongi his a small smile being the only one who knew how hard you practiced at night with him.



Notes: Who do you want y/n to be paired with? 

Are you #teamyoongi or #teamjungkook?? 

stop romanticizing recklessness. our lives are too fragile to not care. do not think it’s an achievement to chug a bottle of whiskey while your friends record you, do not do drugs to keep you awake all night because “you can sleep when you’re dead”, do not think it’s cool that people view you as the fun one because you’re always down to party.

life is beautiful and more people care about you than you could ever realize, it is literally your life in your hands and it can spiral out of control so fast and a lot of times people don’t realize this until they find out too late or the hard way.

people get pissed that Zelda’s portrayed as this fuckin damsel in distress and they’re like “TROPES ARE DUMB NINTENDO IS SEXIST”

and i’m like…
have you…
actually…
played a Zelda game???

when has Zelda EVER ACTUALLY been kidnapped by Ganon PAST THE FIRST GAME?

  • in Zelda 2 and I think Minish Cap she was in a cursed sleep
  • In ALttP she was hiding and I believe later sealed away in another world for a while
  • In OoT she was sneaking around as a ninja trying to help you
  • In Four Swords Adventures and A Link Between Worlds she was sealed away
  • in Wind Waker she’s a pirate who travels with you
  • In Twilight Princess she LITERALLY HELPS YOU KILL GANON AND PARTICIPATES IN THE FIGHT
  • in Spirit Tracks she’s DEAD (AND RETURNS FROM THE DEAD AS A GHOST TO HELP YOU ANYWAY.)
  • in Skyward Sword she’s training to unlock her potential as the LITERAL GODDESS INCARNATE
  • in Breath of the Wild she spent her days studying to unlock her power and then spent a hundred years using it to keep her kingdom safe while all her friends and family FUCKING DIED ALL AROUND HER

she’s sealed away and put to sleep so many times because she NEEDS to be disabled

YOU KNOW WHY?

BECAUSE NOT EVEN DEATH CAN STOP ZELDA FROM KICKING YOUR FUCKING ASS

ZELDA CRIED IN BOTW BECAUSE SHE FAILED TO STOP GANON AND LITERALLY ALLOWED A GENOCIDE TO HAPPEN
SHE’S NOT CRYING BECAUSE “WAH I’M SCARED I NEED A MAN TO PROTECT ME”
SHE’S CRYING BECAUSE SHE WAS TOLD HER ENTIRE LIFE IT WAS HER DUTY TO STOP THE LITERAL END OF THE WORLD. AND SHE FAILED.

SO YOU CAN TAKE YOUR DAMSEL ACCUSATIONS AND GLUE THEM TO ZELDA’S FOOT

SO THEY GET SHOVED UP YOUR ASS WHEN ZELDA KICKS IT

7

Dan and Phil x Harry Potter x Life is Strange Crossover

A Concept: You play as Daniel Howell, a young half-blood wizard who mysteriously receives time-rewinding powers at the beginning of his first year at Hogwarts. He realizes his powers do not adhere to the same spatiotemporal constraints as time turners: they do not obey the Novikov Self-Consistency Principle, and can only rewind up to five minutes at a time.  Unbeknownst to Dan, his powers are finite - the rate of depletion is available only to you, the player, in a meter on the right of the screen. For the first half of his time at Hogwarts, you use Dan’s powers to remake decisions to make life easier for him and his Muggle-born best friend Phil. Then, in his fourth year, Harry Freakin’ Potter returns from the maze with a dead body and life for Dan gets really dark really quickly. You realize too late you should probably have conserved your powers for the war.

There are four fixed events in the game: Befriending Phil, Cedric’s death, Dumbledore’s death, and Dan’s powers running out sometime during the Battle of Hogwarts.

100 Harry Potter Prompts: Part 1

This list is #$@&%*! amazing, amigos! Thanks for all the submissions. Here is part 1:

  1. Parseltongues aren’t the only ones who can talk to certain animals; There are a number of hereditary abilities that allow wizards to understand and communicate with other species. You are a young wizard who can understand birds, and it is driving you CRAZY.
  2. 10 years later, on the day of the battle of Hogwarts. George is standing in front of the mirror, looking himself in the eyes, wishing that his reflection was someone else.
  3. Harry Potter prompt: The Basilisk from the Chamber of Secrets is back! …but now it’s the size of a thread snake.
  4. A muggle angered by the fact that there are only 10 dragons in this world and 7 of them are European, sets off to find more dragons.
  5. Your entire family is full of Hufflepuffs, so during your sorting you begged the Sorting Hat to place you there. Now you’re older and definitely a Slytherin and you need to hide it.
  6. Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes has an adult section in the back.
  7. after Ron picks up the wrong hairs for a polyjuice potion Hermione is making, the two find themselves in each other’s bodies.
  8. You are the new heir of Slytherin, capable of opening the Chamber of Secrets and talking to snakes. On your first visit you find the monster dead. Not that you care, you never hated muggles anyway. Instead you start giving guided tours, charging a couple of Sickles for each tour, trying your best not to make the teachers notice.
  9. You’re a muggle born sorted into Slytherin of all places. The other students warn you that the Bloody Baron hates muggles, but to your surprise, the ghost has somewhat of a different view on muggleborns like you…
  10. Harry DOES get sorted into Slytherin when he asks not to be and becomes best friends with Draco as well.
  11. No one knew Voldemort was the last line of defence against them. Now he’s gone, and they are coming.
  12. Many years after the Dark Lord Voldemort was killed, a new dark lord has come. He’s part of the ministry and the new candidate for minister of magic..
  13. When Harry Potter dies in his first year at Hogwarts, Hermoine Granger takes on the duty of defeating the dark lord and succeeds in her task in the second year. The wizarding world is safe once again. Describe how she managed this.
  14. Write about Hermiones struggles and success as Minister of Magic.
  15. The dementors may suck the souls out of their victims with their kiss, but what happens to the soul after that?
  16. As a young gifted wizard, Sirius Black once found the Mirror of Erised; but what did he see as he glanced upon its glass?
  17. Hagrid comes every year to celebrate Harry’s birthday
  18. Harry never got a letter. He goes through his day to day life as a muggle, never noticing obnoxiously weird things around him. Write a day in the life of harry the muggle
  19. You’re invited to Tom riddle’s 6th birthday party
  20. Magical patronuses are extremely rare. It’s said that only the pure or the purely evil can conjure them. You’re a Slytherin trying to prove what they say about Slytherins is wrong. In Defence against dark arts, you just found out your patronus is a Hungarian horntail.
  21. “Don’t worry, Potter,” said the Dark Lord, “killing will get easier. And as my right hand man, you’ll need to get used to it.”
  22. Au where Snape is the chosen one and Harry is the Potions master
  23. In second year, Draco writes in the diary of Tom Riddle instead, and gets some pretty sound advice.
  24. “You went to school for seven years and THIS is what you use your skills on? Just- Just tell us why THIS branch of Animagi…?”
  25. Harry’s a girl, and has to deal with all the Voldemort shit when she has cramps so she’s extra pissed off.
  26. The Nimbus 3000 just came out, you are one galleon short but you desperately want it, how will you get your hands on the new broom?
  27. You somehow stumble into Filch’s office and grab the nearest artifact before you escape.
  28. Both Harry and Neville are the ‘chosen ones’. Only together are they able to defeat the Dark Lord. Unfortunately, everyone thinks only Harry is the ‘chosen one’. Follow Neville and co. as they discover the truth.
  29. Divination has a new muggle-born teacher, who seems more intent on teaching useful life lessons than magic.
  30. “You’re a wizard, Hermione.”
  31. “How many times have I told you to leave your dragons in Romania?!”
  32. “You’re a wizard, Harry.” “No shit!”
  33. All the Harry Potter character have switch roles, so that the heroes are now the villains. Who’s who and what happens?
  34. Mcgonagall, after noticing Harry’s letter is being ignored, goes to the Dursleys to check on the young wizard.
  35. Harry wonders what the fuck kinda school this is when Dumbledore says “ The third floor corridor is out of bounds for anyone that doesn’t want to die a most painful death.”
  36. Hermione Granger is one of those kids who is in classes meant for those a few years older than her, she is a genius.
  37. You are a muggle, yet direct magic doesn’t affect you, you wander into Hogwarts, you are not harmed by the shriek of mandrake plants, a basilisk cannot petrify you, magical devices break at your touch. you are a magic null.
  38. You thought you’d made a simple mistake in potions. As you sit outside the headmaster’s office, straining to hear the grave conversation from behind the door, it dawns on you that your error couldn’t have been as simple as it seemed.
  39. Harry goes on a journey of self-love by hiking around an Arby’s parking lot at 2am.
  40. The series is entirely the same but Voldemort and Snape have swapped noses .
  41. A day in the life of Dobby.
  42. Lucius is sacrificed by Voldemort and dies in the Wizarding War leaving pregnant Narcissa disillusioned and scared. She seeks help from Dumbledore and becomes a double agent.
  43. “Hmm, courage… yes… plenty of intelligence too! Very loyal… but crafty… hmm. Tricky, very tricky. I’m sorry, but you don’t seem to belong in any specific house. Better be… HOGWARTS!!!”
  44. Harry and Ron/Hermione and Ginny become the canon ships.
  45. Hermione and Ron visit America for a family vacation. Write about their adventures.
  46. Sassy harry calling Snape and Dumbledore out on their bullshit   24/7.
  47. Ravenclaws have a chamber of secrets, but it’s just a library of infinite knowledge too nerdy to touch.
  48. Post-apocalyptic Draco and Harry, where Draco needs the help of Harry in order for both of them to survive.
  49. You thought you were a muggle-born witch/wizard and then you find one of your long before ancestors in the portraits of the school’s corridors.
  50. You can do magic without a wand. You are the second most wanted after Voldemort.
  51. Disco balls and disco and lgbt folks at Hogwarts
  52. A student is accepted into Hogwarts only to find out it was a mistake and they don’t actually have any magical abilities. Tell their story of trying to make it through Hogwarts after all these years.
  53. Remus Lupin adopts Harry.  He never lived with the Dursleys. Tell us his happy Wizarding Childhood.
  54. You’re a historian writing a critical paper on The Battle Of Hogwarts. You believe the existing discourse has ignored the significance of one woman: Mrs Norris. Write a paper discussing her much-maligned role in the Battle of Hogwarts.
  55. A story about the lonely, never-useful life of Snape’s shampoo bottle.
  56. Rumour has it the new Defense against the Dark Arts teacher has already arrived and is hiding. Whoever finds them gets 500 points for their house.
  57. write the wizarding sex ed pamphlet that gets handed out to fifth years.
  58. everything’s the same except every character is a lizard.
  59. Describe the three trials in the next Triwizard Tournament.
  60. “Nobody knew about the fifth Hogwarts founder, and the secret they hid in the castle… until now”
  61. Minerva McGonagall is quite puzzled by Dumbledore’s recent hires for Defense Against the Dark Arts, and would like to have a serious talk with him about it.
  62. You decide to try flying on a broom just for shits and giggles. It works, and now you need help. A lot of help.
  63. The previous magical protection of the prime minister has been retired. You have taken their place.
  64. The Wizarding World decided it’s time to explore space.
  65. Doleres Umbridge is now the head teacher of Hogwarts and president Snow form panel is the minister for magic. They have reinvented the triwizard tournament to have aspects of the hunger games. Tell the story of this year’s tributes.
  66. “When I wished to be part of the world of Harry Potter, I was hoping for an acceptance letter to Hogwarts, not for the bridge I was crossing to be demolished by death eaters on my way home from work!”
  67. You are a squib from a long line of witches and wizards who has never made any contact with the Muggle world. Today is your first day of high school.
  68. Hermione blinked. “You’re right, Ron. I’ve been doing it wrong all this time.”
  69. Through a series of events, you land yourself in the world of Harry Potter. The catch? You’ve never read a word from the books and have absolutely no clue what’s going on.
  70. The entire series but everyone is emo as hell.
  71. You are Harry Potter’s less famous twin sibling. All you want is a quiet wizarding school life.
  72. Write the science behind magic.
  73. You are in the infamous library where no books have titles. Somehow, you pick up Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone. You want to help in any way you can.
  74. “The wand chooses the wizard” except this time three have chosen the same master. And they’re attempting to duel each other.
  75. Re-write one of the quidditch chapters from the perspective of the snitch.
  76. Harry being raised by Sirius and Remus because they actually caught Wormtail
  77. Dumbledore reads My Immortal and thinks it’s really good.
  78. “The Death Eaters stole this from the Muggles. What is it, Hermione?” “Ron, I…I think it’s a Nuke.”  "WICKED! Dad’s gonna love this!“
  79. Draco and Ron get in a wizard’s fight; Harry has to reveal his love for Draco by protecting him.
  80. While looking through Filch’s files of rescinded objects, you find something extremely dangerous. Just as you put it in your pocket for later investigation, you get caught by Peeves the poltergeist.
  81. A deaf Ravenclaw, a disabled Slytherin, a mute Gryffindor, and a black trans Hufflepuff help together to cope with each other’s’ problems.
  82. You’ve just received a Howler in front of the whole school. What does it say and how does the school react?
  83. A very derpy Dementor who doesn’t even try and suck souls, but just wants to be friends with everyone and gets sad easily so everyone has to cheer it up.
  84. As it turns out, Neville is the strongest wizard of all.
  85. Write a love story about Dumbledore and Grindelwald.
  86. Your boggart and your reflection in the Mirror of Erised show the same thing.
  87. Who maintains the enchanted ceiling at Hogwarts? How did they get the job and what’s their life like?
  88. Finally, Hogwarts gets its Wi-Fi hotspot.
  89. After a traumatising first year at Hogwarts, Ginny Weasley has to learn to deal with the long-term psychological effects of having been possessed by a dark wizard.
  90. Someone didn’t focus enough when trying to apparate somewhere and somehow wound up on Mars.
  91. You show someone the Mirror of Erised for the first time. You ask what they see, and they just look at you strangely. “What? Did you forget how mirrors work? I just see us.”
  92. A story written from the perspective of a student who died in the battle of Hogwarts, and is now a ghost there.
  93. Hogwarts wants to open a school in another part of the world.
  94. It’s been a hundred years, or so, and you’re still stuck in this dusty, shabby place. As a wand, it would be nice if you could finally choose the perfect wizard to wield you.
  95. You hide pictures of Voldemort in most  unusual places to freak other students out
  96. AU where all spells are imaginary. They’re basically running around with sticks yelling nonsense.
  97. The DA learned their most important lesson from Hermione - always bring a gun to a wand fight.
  98. Write about the day the magical world discovered internet (and proceeded to make their own WizNet)
  99. Harry Potter where Harry’s dad survived but is left emotionally destroyed by Voldemort’s attack.
  100. Harry Potter lowers his wand at himself. He swore he would rid the world of Horcruxes. He was about to make good on that promise.

 Let’s make a new list right away. Do you have a prompt for us?

Best quotes from the new dnp craft video

“Friends are important. then you have more knives”

*laughing* “Lying makes you go to hell!”

“This one’s long with a big head. Like him!”

“Throw the smallest over your shoulder! No one wants that.” 

“I’ve selected as many knives as i have friends. Two!”

*heavy breathing*

“Next, grab your potato! Grip it with all your strength.”

“Slice it like it will remember it.”

“Chopping things fills me with good memories.”

“Sometimes its nice to look up at the stars and remember that theyre all already dead.” 

“The universe is so big….and cold.”

“If you make a mistake while cutting, just think about it for the rest of the day!”

“Phil. Too hard. You hurt it.”

“Space is violent.”

“I only trust my potato with my true friend”

“Im going to place mine [potato] in the trapdoor under my bed.”

*satanic shit*

Sad Rock Songs

here are the songs that I listen to when I’m sad they’re ranging from alt to post hardcore so a little bit for everyone
Listen here (https://open.spotify.com/user/1178564415/playlist/68q6lTQWt6yQD907WcXAcD) on Spotify thanks to @chrondodite “Ten”- Yellowcard
“Sing For Me”- Yellowcard
“What a Catch, Donnie”- Fall Out Boy
“The End of All Things”- P!ATD
“The Light Behind Your Eyes”- MCR
“Fake Your Death”- MCR
“If It Means A Lot To You”- ADTR
“Stone Walls”- We The Kings
“Just Keep Breathing”- We The Kings
“I’ve Given Up On You”- Real Friends
“The Messenger”- Linkin Park
“Coffee Break”- Forever The Sickest Kids
“The Kids Aren’t Alright”- Fall Out Boy
“MSK”- Yellowcard
“Missing You”- All Time Low
“Future”- Paramore
“Last Hope”- Paramore
“The Only Exception”- Paramore
“Demon Limbs”- PVRIS
“King Of Anything”- Beartooth
“Mt. St. Joseph”- A Loss For Words
“Hate To See Your Heart Break”- Paramore
“Legendary”- The Summer Set
“Better Off Dead”- Sleeping With Sirens
“Lead Me Out Of The Dark”- Crown The Empire
“Call Me”- Shinedown
“Therapy”- All Time Low
“Pieces”- Sum 41
“Snuff”- Slipknot
“How to Save a Life”- The Fray
“Remembering Sunday”- All Time Low
“Monster”- Paramore
“Hated”- Beartooth
“Disenchanted”- MCR
“Bullet”- Hollywood Undead
“Hate Me”- Blue October
“Hold On Till May”- Pierce The Veil
“The World Is Ugly”- MCR
“This Is Gospel”- P!ATD
“Crash”- Sum 41
“Believe”- Mumford and Sons
“Demons”- Imagine Dragons
“Only One”- Yellowcard
“California”- Yellowcard
“Lift A Sail”- Yellowcard
“This Song Saved My Life”- Simple Plan
“Golden”- Fall Out Boy
“Human Interaction”- Tonight Alive
“Amelia”- Tonight Alive
“Only Love”- PVRIS
“Empty”- PVRIS
“Clairvoyant”- The Story So Far
“Dark On You”- Starset
“Jenny”- Nothing More
“Take On The World”- You Me At Six
“Placeholder”- The Story So Far
“Sleeping At The Wheel”- Matchbox Twenty
“Beacon Hill”- Damien Jurado
“I Of The Storm”- Of Monsters and Men
“Paper Walls”- Yellowcard
“COMA”- Issues
“The Lines”- Beartooth
“Save You”- Simple Plan
“Terrible Things”- Mayday Parade
“Stay”- Mayday Parade
“Miserable At Best”- Mayday Parade
“Roses”- Against The Current
“Paralyzed”- Against The Current
“Monster”- Starset
“You Found Me”- The Fray
“Where The Story Ends”- The Fray
“Third Eye”- Florence + The Machine
“I’ll Be OK”- Nothing More
“Disloyal Order of Water Buffaloes”- Fall Out Boy
“Hear Me”- Imagine Dragons
“Lonely Girl”- Tonight Alive
“Let It Die”- Starset
“End Of Me”- A Day To Remember
“Reassemble”- A Day To Remember
“Crash”- You Me At Six
“Little House”- The Fray
“For You”- All That Remains
“Never Too Late”- Three Days Grace
“God Went North”- Nothing More
“Heaven”- PVRIS
“If You Wanted A Song Written About You, All You Had To Do Was Ask”- Mayday Parade

settle down | (m)

• pairing: min yoongi x reader, roommate! yoongi
• genre/warnings: smut, angst, fluff, slow buuurrrn, enemies to lovers
• words: 14,930
→summary: An unfortunate event finds you living with the man you practically despise over the summer. However, maybe through a series of fortunate events, you find yourself falling for him…
• note. this is a remastered version of the originally story I wrote called ‘and july’ (found here) that I wrote for suho back when I started this blog, albeit slightly (very?) different.

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Imagine - Zach gets jealous

Originally posted by sensualkisses

@ambrosebabyy Request: “Can I get a Zach Dempsey imagine ? Were he sees Bryce all over me and gets really protective?”

@thrtreasons Request: “jealous!zach…. i just… oh my god sorry i am sooooo zach trash”

@hanna-ranay Request: “Honestly an imagine about Zach would truly be appreciated, if you can. If not, it’s okay. Thank you!”

Jessica Davis was having a party at her house tonight, and of course you, being her best friend, had to go. You, Jessica, Justin, Zach, Bryce, Monty, and several other students from Liberty high were sitting in the living room playing suck and blow. You were sandwiched between Bryce Walker and Zach Dempsey.

You would never admit it to anyone, but you had a huge crush on Zach. And you’re pretty sure Jessica knew, she is your best friend after all, how could she not. But you were too shy to act upon your feelings towards him and you believed that he would never want to be with someone like you. Even though you hung out with Jessica and the more popular kids at Liberty high, you were still known as quite the nerd. And someone like Zach Dempsey don’t go for nerdy girls like you, they go for skinny cheerleaders who are drop dead gorgeous. 

Anyways, the game of suck and blow had already started, and you were pretty nervous to say at the least. Because you had to put your mouth against Zach’s with only a thin card in between the two of your lips. It was getting closer and closer to your turn until some girl pressed her mouth against Bryce’s passing the card on to him. He turned towards you, card on his lips. Bryce scooted closer to you quickly, sandwiching you more between him and Zach, until the point where you were chest to chest with Bryce and your back was pressed firmly against Zach’s muscular chest. Bryce then proceeded to place his card covered lips against yours, and quickly, in the process of passing the card onto you, snuck his hand around you to grab a hold of your backside and give it a good squeeze. His actions shocked you and you jumped, emitting a little squeal which was muffled by the card between yours and Bryce’s lips. Still in shock from what is happening right now, you faintly hear a deep growl from behind you…

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Top 10 Btvs Quotes

Buffy the Vampire Slayer is without question the defining piece of media of my life. I watched it as it aired all throughout my adolescence and it profoundly shaped my life and self in so many ways from big to small (hell, even the way I talk and randomly slap together prefixes and suffixes as a phrase called for can be traced back to Buffy).

While it has its issues, the show taught me to believe in myself, to keep going, to treasure my weirdness and the strange and awkward things that don’t fit are the best things about me and what makes me me. It showed me that superheroes come in all shapes and sizes, with and without capes, in and out of the spotlight. It defined the kind of person I wanted to be and I know there’s a whole generation of people that feel the same.

In honor of the 20th anniversary here’s a list of my personal top ten most meaningful Buffy quotes. There are a billion and fifty amazing, quotable moments and these aren’t even necessarily my favorite. These are the ones that meant the most to me, the ones that stuck with me and I think of when I need them.

“No weapons, no friends, no hope. Take all that away and what’s left?”
“Me”


“I’m the thing the monsters have nightmares about.”


"Seize the moment, ‘cause tomorrow you might be dead.”


“To forgive is an act of compassion, Buffy. It’s-it’s… it’s not done because people deserve it. It’s done because they need it.”


“I made it up. I’m making it all up. So what kind of hero does that make me?”


Originally posted by i-want-to-b-found

“No guy is worth your life, not ever”


“When I say ‘I love you,’ it’s not because I want you or because I can’t have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I’ve seen your kindness and your strength. I’ve seen the best and worst of you. And I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You’re a hell of a woman.”


“I guess I just realized how amazingly screwed up they all are. I mean, really, really screwed up, in a monumental fashion. And they have no purpose that unites them so they just drift around, blundering through life until they die… which they… they know is coming, yet every single one of them is surprised when it happens to them. They’re incapable of thinking about what they want beyond the moment. They kill each other, which is clearly insane. And yet, here’s the thing – when it’s something that really matters, they fight. I mean, they’re lame morons for fighting, but they do. They never… never quit. So I guess I will keep fighting too.”


“They’ll never know how tough it is, Dawnie. To be the one who isn’t chosen. To live so near the spotlight and never step in it. But I know. I see more than anybody realizes because nobody’s watching me. I saw you last night. I see you working here today. You’re not special. You’re extraordinary.”


Originally posted by amythegloriouspond

“The hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live. For me.”

Things Said/Heard During Finals Week
  • “I’m teaching myself French in one night. It’s going great.”
  • “Want some Raisinettes?”
  • “Let my people go…”
  • “I love the book on your head.”
  • “It’s an aesthetic. The cigarettes, the Raisinettes… it’s solid.”
  • “Oh, thank god, I found a banana in my pocket.”
  • “It’s… it’s less phlegmy than that. More sensual.”
  • “That’s a fucking… bird.”
  • “REAL RECOGNIZES REAL”
  • “Oh, I’m paying for my sins. We all are.”
  • “Nothing matters any more. Do you want ice cream?”
  • “It’ll all be alright in the end. Depending on how you define ‘alright’ and how you define ‘end.’”
  • “I haven’t slept all night, I’m vibrating slightly but constantly, and I’m pretty sure I just tasted god. How are you doing?”
  • “A note to people writing last-minute papers: caps lock might seem like it’s your friend. It isn’t.”
  • “Chicago-style citations means we don’t put any ketchup on the bibliography page, right?”
  • “The good news is that GPA is actually pretty insignificant in the face of all of our inevitable deaths, so…”
  • “God, I wish I had the core strength to consider stripping as a fallback.”
  • “Lifehack: Sleep when you’re dead. We’re all dead inside already. So sleep whenever.”
  • “I haven’t seen the world outside the library in so long.”
  • “It’s like the song says, you know? There’ll be peace when you are done.”

how to be a donna tartt character

wear old-fashioned clothes in all black or all white, odd glasses are a bonus

have weird nicknames with your friends and only refer to each other by them

intellectualism™ is important. make sure everyone knows that you love homer more than them

moral ambiguity is slightly more important. wanna scam people with fake antiques? wanna murder a friend? wanna steal your stepmom’s dog and drugs and run away across america? wanna semi-accidentally steal a painting and worry about it for years? wanna get into an ecstatic state and murder some random farmer? no time like the present

speak a few languages, preferably dead ones or russian

embrace your angst. amplify your angst. worry

consume copious amounts of substances. smoke, develop a drug problem, get sick drinking as often as possible

forget having actual romantic relationships with people, instead opt for romanticizing someone and obsessing over them and then confessing your love unsuccessfully or being totally gay for your best friend and then denying it later when they try to bring it up

Dare | Jimin (M)


Fluff | Crack | Smut | Bff!Jimin | Policeman!Jimin

word count: 32.6k+

You and Jimin have been playing an ongoing game of dare since the fourth grade, the only thing off limits —much to his disappointment— was daring you to marry him.

A/N: i’m…. so.. ecstatic to be finished with this MONSTROSITY 


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Stiles can’t shower at his house anymore, not since the sacrifices. Just seeing the tub gives me flash backs to going under the water at Deaton’s, the thought of actually getting into one is enough to send him over the edge into a full on panic attack. 

He showers in the locker room now, in the open space where he knows he can’t go under. He knows that it’s not a permanent solution, but for now it works. 

After everything with the Nogitsune Stiles stands in the locker room showers for at least an hour. He can’t get the feel of blood off of his hands. He scrubs himself until he’s red, until his skin is tender to the touch, and then he scrubs more. 

There were too many places with bad memories attached now, but Stiles gets through them, he has to. He still can’t look at a bathtub without feeling sick to his stomach. That’s where it started for him, that’s how the Nogitsune got in. 

So he still showers at school, he avoids talking about his feelings and his struggles because it’s his fault that Allison is dead, that Isaac is gone, that Scott’s a werewolf. It’s all his fault and he knows that, so he stays strong and steady on the outside, if not a bit defiant. 

It all works out fine until the school is locked for summer and Derek is missing and Lydia is grieving the death of her best friend so he can’t talk to her, and Scott is off trying to better himself so he can’t bother him. 

After a week of sink showers Stiles finally gets an idea and breaks into the loft. Well breaks into is a very loose term, he has a key and he doesn’t think Derek would mind him using his shower. 

That plan works well until Derek is back. By then the school is open again, but he knows that Derek can tell he’s been there. There’s no way he doesn’t smell Stiles in the bathroom, on the couch, in the bed. 

But Derek doesn’t call him out on it, instead he squeezes Stiles neck and reminds him that his door is always open if he needs to get away. Stiles knows that if anyone would understand how he’s feeling, it would be Derek. He knows that, but he can’t bring himself to tell him anything. 

He does go to the loft sometimes, mostly to use Derek’s shower and always when he knows Derek is out. That plan works as well as he other plans, meaning it’s great until it isn’t.

It’s a Sunday and Stiles is stepping out of a hot shower at the loft, he had a bad night, dreams of dead brown eyes and sticking swords into friends had kept him up. He had been alone when he got to the loft, but when he steps out of the bathroom Derek is sitting on the couch reading a book. 

“None of this is your fault,” Derek tells him, not looking up from the book, “You didn’t ask to be possessed, you didn’t want to be sacrificed, none of this is on you.”

“Or is it all on me,” Stiles says, toweling his hair dry and looking at Derek, “If I hadn’t dragged Scott into the woods that first night none of this would have happened.”

“By that line of logic this is actually all my fault,” Derek says with a sigh, making Stiles think that Derek really believes that it’s his fault, “The fire never would have happened if it wasn’t for me.”

“We both know the fire would have happened without you,” Stiles says because it’s true.

“And if Scott hadn’t gotten bitten someone else would have,” Derek counters, “It’s not your fault.”

“Maybe,” Stiles says, sitting down next to Derek. It feels like the right time to tell someone why he can’t shower at home so he adds, “I can’t go near a bathtub after being sacrificed.”

“The smell of smoke still makes me sick,” Derek admits and Stiles bumps his shoulder against him. “We’ve all got our damage. You’re not letting yours keep you from living, that’s important.”

“You too,” Stiles tells him, “Maybe we can try to move forward from all of this shit together. It’s easier with someone else helping.”

“Yeah, it is,” Derek says quietly, looking at Stiles with a soft look that he’s only seen a few times before. 

And maybe Stiles still can’t take a bath, but with Derek (and a therapists) help he starts taking showers in a bathtub. And maybe Derek can’t watch open flames, but he can smell smoke without throwing up because Stiles helps him open up (and takes him to therapy once a week).

They move forward together. And eventually they’re both well enough emotionally to admit that they love each other. Every day is a journey for them, but they’re on that journey together, that’s what matters. 

i always get a little miffed when i see apollo refered to as “the only man artemis ever loved” because no he wasn’t there was this dude named orion who accidentally stumbled on her hunting camp one time and she got all “hey fuck off im not having any of your rapey shit” but he was just like “dude wtf no its night time in the forest and youve got a campfire i just want to get warm” and she was like “???? okay?? this is weird and i don’t trust you but whatever” and they got to talking and they became the bestest hunting buddies ever and then apollo showed up like “oh HELL no youre not having your way with my sister” and tried to kill orion but artemis was like “damn it you sunbaked asshole think before you attack do you really think i couldnt have killed this guy on my own if i wanted to? hes cool af okay ima be mad as hell if you hurt him” and apollo was like “oh okay i get it i have to be sneaky about the fact that im a jealous fucknut who wants to kill this dude just because youre hanging out with him instead of me” so he gave orion a dream where he got killed by a fucking 10 foot scorpion and when he woke up there was an actual 10 foot scorpion outside his house so he did what any reasonable motherfucker would do and grabbed his gods damn sword to try and kill it but it was too strong and it pushed him back into the sea so he just goes “fuck this shit ima swim for it” and then apollo went to artemis and was all like “hey i saw this dude rape and kill a girl and i could have killed him myself but i thought youd want to do it” and artemis is all “youre damn right i do” and she shoots an arrow through orion’s face from so far away that his head looked like a tiny dot on the water at which point apollo just starts laughing like “haha lmao you said i couldnt kill him so i got you to do it for me also btw i lied about seeing him do some shit see ya” and fucks off to leave artemis alone with her dead best friend so she does what gods always do when shit goes down and hangs orion in the stars and goes to kill the scorpion but you know apollo didnt like that too much so he tries to send his fuckening scorpion up there to get orion a second time but artemis fuckin swats it and the scorpion ends up on the other fucking end of the sky so it never comes anywhere near him and theyre not even up there during the same months so since orion’s up there trying to hunt down that fucking scorpion and it’s trying to obey apollo and kill him, they just chase each other in circles for all eternity BUT orion got the better end of that deal because his belt is one of the most recognizable asterisms in the sky and i fucking dare you to tell me what scorpio looks like.

So he only wants you when your clothes are off and if that’s not the case he doesn’t want you at all. So you have a decision to make, do you take the boy and loose yourself? Or keep your innocence and loose the boy? Either way you’re left empty.

So you’re crying on the bus home because the boy you gave yourself up to 2 weeks prior, decided he would rather stay at home that meet the girl he stole everything from.

And your best friend is too busy getting high with a random group of girls to pick up the phone. She’ll pretend she accidentally clicked decline later on and you’ll forgive her because she’s still all you have.

So this is how it goes. You give pieces of yourself to everyone and end up with nothing . And at the end of the day you’re always just so fucking sad. And sometimes it seems you’re better off with nobody to let you down. And other times it seems you’re better off dead.

OFF THE CUFF HOMESTUCK THOUGHTS #3: THE SELF PILE DOESN’T STOP FROM GETTING TALLER OR: THE PROBLEM OF DEAD MARIOS

DISCLAIMER

IMPORTANT THEORETICAL FRAMEWORK

[CHECK THE TAG FOR MORE THOUGHTS]

So, a long-ass time ago, Rose and Dave had a conversation like this:

TT: After you go, what do you think will happen to me?
TT: Will I just cease to exist?
TG: i dont know
TG: i mean your whole timeline will
TG: maybe
TT: Maybe?
TT: Is there a chance it’ll continue to exist, and I’ll just be here alone forever?
TT: I’m not sure which outcome is more unsettling.
TG: the thing with time travel is
TG: you cant overthink it
TG: just roll with it and see what happens
TG: and above all try not to do anything retarded
TT: What do you think I should do?
TG: try going to sleep
TG: our dream selves kind of operate outside the normal time continuum i think
TG: so if part of you from this timelines going to persist thats probably the way to make it happen
TT: Ok.
TG: and hey you might even be able to help your past dream self wake up sooner without all that fuss you went through
TT: I think the true purpose of this game is to see how many qualifiers we can get to precede the word “self” and still understand what we’re talking about.

This is the most important sentence in Homestuck.

I am dead serious.

Well, OK, I mean, it’s pretty important for understanding some major Homestuck themes and shit or something like that.

Also, I totally should have said: Pre-Retcon Doomed Timeline Non-Dreamself Rose but ultimately about to become Dreamself Rose who semi-merged with Pre-Retcon Alpha Timeline Rose and Doomed Timeline Dave aka Davesprite AKA future Davepetasprite^2 or as we all call them around the office, Davepeta, had that conversation.

Maybe you begin to see what I’m going to talk about here.

One of the major frustrations a lot of people had with the retcon was that the characters we ended up with at the end weren’t the ones we’d come to love and know throughout the story. Was it even worth it, to lose the characters we loved to the tyranny of Game Over? The victorious kids, with the exception of John and Roxy, were other people, with other histories, other goals, and other choices.

Allow me to submit that that may be the whole point.

SBURB is cruel. We’ve known that for a long time. It’s cruel not as Caliborn is cruel, but as the cosmos is cruel, as a supernova is cruel. It wants what it wants, and doesn’t care about how that intersects with the needs of humanity. It wants to make universes through a complex game-playing method, and drags hapless, vulnerable adolescents along for the ride. And most of the time it doesn’t even succeed, leaving its champions to rot in a doomed timeline or similar! Skaia’s victory is an amoral creation myth where individual human beings are just the carved pieces on the chessboard. (I mean, the other ones. Not the carapacians.)

Again, let’s consider the theme of VIDEO GAMES vs. REAL LIFE.

Homestuck, let’s be real, is basically some postmodern horror timey-wimey Jumanji. For a generation way more familiar with pixels than cute little tokens It’s easy for teenagers and in fact, basically everyone, to fantasize about escaping their life and slipping into some game world forever, where they get to do awesome things and be a heroic person.

Homestuck makes that literal. Congratulations, everything you ever knew is dead. You will never see it again, except your internet friends, who turn out also to be your family and other important people. I mean, from a distance, SBURB sounds like an awesome game, right? You figure out who you are and get to wear a cool costume displaying that identity. You get to make anything you want and enjoy this hyperflexible mythology tailored to YOUR CHOICES. HS fans talk all the time about how cool it would be to play a real version of SBURB. That’s a big part of the appeal of SBURB fan adventures. They put you and your friends in the story. Or your favorite characters! It sounds like a fantasy come true.

The thing is, as fantastical as it is, it’s also really fucked up, and ultimately you and your friends are being used. By a giant frog to let it have its babies. By the universe. By a smug blue cloud thing that doesn’t care about you at all.

SBURB does not care about you at all.

The funny thing, SBURB features a mythology with so many layers and nuances and seemingly human motifs about growth and self that you might search for some grand ultimate meaning behind it, but it’s not even human enough to have a personality, to be something you can argue with or fight. It just is. It’s all the cruelty and power of a god without any of the dazzling personality. It’s empty. It just wants to make universes all day long, or fail trying. It is a great, weird tadpole-making machine that eats children.

One of the big ways it doesn’t care about you is its attitude toward the self. Humans and trolls and whatnot prefer not to be relentlessly duplicated. SBURB says, oh yeah, let’s make tons of copies of the player characters and use them for a lot of different purposes.

There’s the dreamself, an essential bifurcation of identity (you are now and were always the dream moon princex) that sometimes gets merged into god tier but sometimes doesn’t. There’s doomed timeline selves, who exist ultimately to augment an Alpha timeline whose Alphaness is decided very arbitrarily and frequently by Lord English. There’s the you who exists before a scratched session and the you who exists afterward, who are two different people but started as one baby in an act of ectobaby meteor duplication, your player self and your guardian self. Dead timeline yous fill up the dreambubbles made by the horrorterrors and get endlessly confused with each other. Any one of these could be the you experience being at any given moment, and which one it is entirely arbitrary. Don’t like being Dead Nepeta #47? Tough hoofbeast leavings, kiddo.

To top it all off, in Terezi: Remember, we learn that every single time we thought someone changed from one self to another, was resurrected or something like that, it was another act of duplication. For every time someone’s died, there’s another version of them waiting in the Dream Bubbles, surprised that they’re not the main character anymore. And we have no way of knowing which is which. Even John, good old everyman John, may or may not be the person who died three or four times. It’s really impossible to say whether we’ve been following the same person throughout our story, or just the illusion of the same person, like a horrifying cosmic flipbook.

The retcon is a return to this same theme. Ultimately, there’s very little new in the changes John makes to reality except that they drive the point home.

John’s friends all died. John and his friends won the game. These things are both true at the same time, except those things may not have happened to the same people. There was a happy ending. Hooray! For, um, some folks who may or may not be the ones we care about. In fact, it’s very confusing, because from Rose’s perspective, Roxy is dead but came back to life, and from Roxy’s perspective Rose is dead but came back to life, except also she came back to life as a weird tentacle catgirl of pure id and self –indulgence. So there’s that. Um. Which Rose are we rooting for again?

Or wait: is it none of them, because the first Rose died in a doomed timeline, hundreds of panels and a number of years ago?

There’s a tension here which one experiences between saying it’s okay because it’s still the same people, and saying it’s not okay, because it’s not the same people at all. This tension is exactly what we’re meant to wrestle with. To put it another way, Homestuck asks if identity can work in aggregate. Are all Johns John, all Roses Rose, and do they all share in what they accomplish? Or are the final victors only accidents created by the whims and needs of the frog baby machine?

What I’m saying, basically, is that the retcon, in the sense that it pointed out our confused relationship with these characters, was already here.

In interviews and questions put to him over the years, Hussie constantly compares HS and SBURB to other video games, particularly Mario, which he frequently returns to as a baseline of comparison that most of his readers will know. One answer, from a recent Hiveswap interview, is particularly revelatory. To the question of “Why do you kill off all your characters?” Hussie replies:

[…]HS is supposedly a story that is also a game. In games, the characters die all the time. How many times did you let Mario fall in the pit before he saved the princess? Who weeps for these Marios. In games your characters die, but you keep trying and trying and rebooting and resetting until finally they make it. When you play a game this process is all very impersonal. Once you finally win, when all is said and done those deaths didn’t “count”, only the linear path of the final victorious version of the character is considered “real”. Mario never actually died, did he? Except the omniscient player knows better. HS seems to combine all the meaningless deaths of a trial-and-error game journey with the way death is treated dramatically in other media, where unlike our oblivious Mario, the characters are aware and afraid of the many deaths they must experience before finally winning the game.

The big man hass the answer.

Homestuck is the story of those dead Marios.

Other works, like Undertale, have engaged with this topic as well. But one of the major differences between Undertale and Homestuck is that in Undertale, between “lives,” one’s consciousness is preserved. In Homestuck, it’s discontinuous, and the value of the overall trial-error process is called into question by the fact that you, the player, may not even get to experience the victory. What meaning does victory hold if that is the case?

So, to put it in a nice thesis format:

One of the central themes of Homestuck is the challenge of reconciling an arbitrary and destructive pattern of growth and victory with the death and suffering you experienced along the way. Homestuck asks: is victory worthwhile if you’re not you anymore? And would you be able to know?

What even is the self? Is there such a thing?

If you were left feeling somewhat disconcerted by our heroes’ tidy victory and departure to their cosmic prize, or by how which Rose gets the spotlight is so deeply, deeply arbitrary, there’s a good reason for that. You’re supposed to be.

The philosophical problem of Wacky Cat Rose is insignificant next to the bullshit of SBURB.

And don’t forget—John and Roxy’s denizens helped them achieve the retcon. Ultimately, the victory they achieved was mediated by the same amoral system of SBURB, and was a victory over an enemy, Caliborn, whose power was created, perpetuated, and ended by that same system.

Okay, so here’s where it gets contentious. There’s an argument to be made, which I’m not sure how I feel about, that some of the character development that could have been in post-retcon Act 6 was left out precisely to push this feeling and play up this tension. Note that this is not the same thing as saying that they were deliberately badly written, but that they’re deliberately written to make us uneasy.That Hussie deliberately played with the balance between making these retconned characters feel familiar and making them feel eerily different to leave us feeling uneasy with the result.

I’m not sure I like that idea. It smacks a little too much of that “everything is perfect” thinking that comes sometimes from the far Metastuck camp. Some of the differences may also be the result of flawed writing. (See: Jane and Jake’s character arcs, which I might talk about later.) And I want to be able to critique those flaws. Ultimately, I think we still needed more time and development to figure out who these new people were—even if our goal was ultimately to compare them to their earlier selves. And again, more conscious acknowledgement of the problem from our heroes—especially John, the linchpin in this last and biggest act of duplication—might have helped drive this theme home.

Still, I think the Problem of Dead Marios is one of the most fundamental questions of Homestuck, maybe THE biggest question. It’s essential to understand it to understand what Hussie’s doing—or attempting to do— in the retcon and the ending.

I don’t know that Homestuck offers us a clear answer to that question. There are some confusions around the issue, too. Where do merged selves fit in, exactly? Clearly they’re a big part of the discussion, because Hussie spends some time in Act 6, especially near the end bringing the identity-merging powers of the Sprites to the forefront. (See also: the identity-merged nightmare that is Lord English.)  Can we even come up with a clear answer to what it means when a dead Mario returns to life grotesquely fused with Toad? How does he beat the game? Does he tell himself that the princess is in another castle? Or what if he merges with Peach? Are they their own princess? How do they know if they’re in the right castle?

Um. Anyway—

Interestingly, it’s not all grotesque—spritesplosions suggest that personalities that are too different don’t stay together long, so a fusion might rely on some inherent compatibility between the two players. Erisol’s self-loathing, sure, but also Fefeta’s cheerfulness. Davepeta seems to be a way of bringing out the best in their players, a way of getting Davesprite past his angst and Nepeta past her fear. Honestly, I know a lot of people don’t like Davepeta as the ending of these two characters’ arcs, but I can’t help but love it. They’re the ultimate coolkid. Cool enough to know they don’t have to be cool. Regular Dave got there, too, of course. But was his retcon assist from John ultimately any different?

Then, of course, we come to Davepeta’s speech to Jade in one of the last few updates before Collide. Davepeta suggests that there is such a thing as an ultimate self beyond the many different selves one piles up throughout the cosmos. A set of principles that describes who you are that’s larger than any individual instance of you. Your inherent Mariohood. (Maybe this is comparable to your Classpect identity, which attempts to describe who you are?) Davepeta even tells Jade, strikingly, that one might learn to see beyond the barriers between selves. Be the ur-self, in practice, rather than theory. This would be incredible news for Jade, who wrestles with the issue of different selves perhaps more than any other character. (There’s a lot to say about Jade.)

Honestly, I wish this ur-self idea had been developed more, and I honestly expected it to be. It doesn’t fully come to fruition, I feel. (Same goes for Davepeta’s character. Ohhhh, ZING!) I’m not sure it entirely makes philosophical sense, especially with fusion—I mean, doesn’t Davepeta themself disprove it? Or at least complicate it? Like, are they part of the ur-Dave or the ur-Nepeta? They seem to imply they’re BOTH? Does that even work? Does that mean that Marieach is all the Peaches and Marios at once?

(In fact, Bowser/Peach/Mario are but the three manifestations of one eternal principle. Also, Bowser/Peach are the true power couple. Read my fanfiction plz.)

And what, say, of Dirk, who ultimately ends up rejecting aspects of his other selves? It feels like there’s a lot more you could say here, and I wonder if Hussie would have said more, if he’d had time. What’s weird is, none of our victorious kids never reach an ur-self (though to their descendants, they become archetypal to some degree), which one might have expected. They’re just individual selves who happened to get lucky. Does that make them representative of the whole? It feels like something’s missing here, or like something got dropped at the last minute.

Same goes for the idea of the Ultimate Riddle. You’d be forgiven for missing it, but there’s been this riddle in the background lore of SBURB that seems to have something to do with personal agency in this overwhelming, overarching system. Karkat called it predestination, saying something like “ANY HOPE YOU HAD OF DOING THINGS OTHERWISE WAS JUST A RUSE.” But others have interpreted it more positively. My favorite interpretation, from bladekindeyewear: the answer to the Riddle is that YOU shape the timeline through your existence, personality, and choices, even when it looks like it’s all predestination. Ultimately it’s your predestination, your set of events, based deeply on your nature, that you are creating. Someone like Caliborn can use his innate personality to achieve power; someone like John might be able to use it to achieve freedom.

I definitely expected something like that to be expressed more explicitly. Like, a big ah-ha moment that helps John or Jade or whoever understand how to escape Caliborn’s system. Something like that would have been very helpful for a lot of our heroes, actually, who’ve been pushed around by Skaia and SBURB together, in finding a cathartic ending.  Once again, I wonder if something was dropped or rushed because there wasn’t time to put it all in. There’s places where you can see hints of that Answer being implied, maybe? But it’s kind of ambiguous.

You can see how the Answer to the Ultimate Riddle ties into some of Davepeta’s ideas. If your personality, the rules of your behavior are a fundamental archetype that goes beyond each individual self, then the answer to whether it matters if one self of yours makes it through to victory is an emphatic YES. You are all of those people, and by winning one round with Skaia, you’ve won the whole game, despite all the arbitrary challenges and deaths it heaps upon you along the way.

This may strike some as too positive for Skaia’s brutality, or again, some way of excusing flaws in many characters’ arcs, or unfair things that happen to them. To be fair, I don’t know that Davepeta’s necessarily meant to be taken as authoritative or the voice of Hussie. They may simply be offering a purrspective.

Hussie not choosing to come right out and engage with the Ultimate Riddle leaves the question of Dead Marios and what they mean for the victorious versions of our cast very open. I like that in some ways—let the reader decide—but I can’t help but wish we had more to work with in making that decision. Plus, it might have brought the thematic messages of Homestuck all the way home to tie them more closely to our characters and their experiences—character development being one of the things most people found most lacking in the ending.

NEXT TIME: All that wacky gnostic stuff probably

The Name Game

The Name Game (m)

Word count: 3.1k

Genre/warning: smut, literally no plot - I legit was having some Tae feels and wanted a dirty talk, fuckboy one shot. So this is the result.

Also for my baby girl, @borderlinehc hope you enjoy. 

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Summary: You invite some of your friends over for a small party. When a tame night in turns into a dirty one. Your friend Hoseok comes up with a fun game for you all to participate in.

You were rushing around your house getting everything ready at the last possible second. It was only some of your closest friends coming over but you still wanted the house to look good. Especially if Taehyung might show up. He said he had to work but he would try and get his shift covered. You felt like such a teenager but you really did have such a big thing for him.

Keep reading

Hamilton characters as things my friends have said
  • Alexander: -about a broken oven- i will be your oven...and roAST YOU
  • Burr: maybe I should tell him my backstory and he'll go away right away
  • Mulligan: i was a pervy child i think...i don't remember
  • Lafayette: -screeches in a foreign language-
  • Laurens: -after learning a corgi's butt floats- rain drop drop top his booty go bop bop
  • Washington: yes, while i may have gotten all i needed to get done, i am dead inside
  • Peggy: i have the courage of a chicken nugget
  • Angelica: i like my boys how i like my liz; stoic and ready to start a revolution
  • Eliza: i just want to make lots of money so we can gift each other things
  • Jefferson: so yeah, unless you're married or own an aerosmith tee strAIGHT FROM THE SEVENTIES...get out
  • Madison: i accidentally listened to its quiet uptown and ruined my life
  • King George: I do not like the 4th