What if mama kouyou secretly ships soukoku and whenever tachihara tries to make a move on chuuya kouyou just stands behind the poor guy whilst saying,"forgive me child but your efforts are useless because chuuya is already taken."(random thoughts XD)
- Except Kouyou is probably is a scheming fox lady so she probably knows threatening Tachihara is not gonna bring her idiot of an OTP back together.
- So she lets Tachihara does what he does best (”Hi Chuuya-san would you like to go on a da- I mean platonic hang out with me this weekend”) but she snaps a bunch of pictures everytime Chuuya smiles at Tachihara.
- And then she sends them all to Dazai with a really eloquent caption that basically translate to “Lmao look how happy your ex-partner is isn’t he cute he seems to move on already but you wouldn’t care would you he’s your ex (-partner) after all”.
- From 500 miles away, Fukuzawa sneezes and asks Kunikida if the heater in the office is broken again because the room’s temperature seems to suddenly drop can they just budget a new heater for the kittens.
- Kunikida, knowing the actual cause (bless him) and doesn’t want to spend money on a new heater, throws Dazai out of the room and it’s suddenly warm again.
- “Ane-san, I already said I didn’t care about him, stop sending me pictures of the hat rack” Says Dazai, in a cheerful voice, adding new cracks to his cheap ass phone for the 20th time that month.
- “Sure, I’ll go out with you (to the platonic hang out this weekend)” Chuuya’s voice comes from the other lines, because Kouyou might or might not be holding a bug right next to her phone instead of answering. Ane-san that’s just shady stop it.
- That day Atsushi reports that he has never seen Dazai-san run so fast in his entire life (”Are they having a sales on chazuke is that why he was running”) and Akutagawa reports that Chuuya-san is not available for missions for the next 3 days due to hip problems.