yoga is the way to go

Things that I learned in my first year at university

1. Some people are not there to work, they’re just joking around. Don't waste your time with them and try to meet the people that really care.

2. One semester passes at the speed of light. Start from day one and try not to let anything unrevised for too long (one week is considered too long).

3. Your teachers will be your saviors. They are the ones who know everything so make sure you have a good working relationship with them (let them see you know stuff and are willing to work) and then when you’re having more trouble learning something they will gladly help you.

4. Be consistent with your routine. A routine helps you get started more easily and defeat the inertia and laziness. Organizing my day as a working day, with study starting at 10 in the morning and classes in the afternoon, helps me focusing on the things I have to do, not waste time, and also have tiny pieces of time during the day to treat myself.

5. Treat yourself. Sometimes I take the bus instead of the metro because I like to watch the views. Sometimes I buy a cake for lunch. Sometimes I take a break in the park and, at the end of the day I go on a walk. Make sure you don’t forget yourself in the middle of everything. You’re the most important thing!

6. Find things that motivate you. A nice looking library, a park, a playlist, everything is valid as long as it makes you ready to work.

7. Choose your group wisely. When making group projects make sure you choose the people who really want to work, and if they don’t talk to your teachers, they will advise you. Also, don’t be afraid to make a group project on your own. You will survive, trust me! And you will learn a lot!

8. The front seat is the best. Choose a good seat in class where you can see and hear your teacher and they can hear you. The front seat is my favorite because it is easier to ignore everyone else and focus on the class.

9. Exercise. Really! Do something like walking every day, or yoga, or whatever you prefer, but make sure you move. It helps your brain and your body.

10. Have fun. At least every week or twice a month, go somewhere you like or visit a new place. Play the tourist and take your mind away from the work. That’s the way to keep your mind sane.

Guys, I know everyone loves reblogging that Spencer gif of him getting punched in the face, but we shouldn’t be spreading the idea that it’s okay to punch Nazis. 

I know whoever punched him had good intentions, but he could have seriously, seriously hurt his own hand. Punching someone in the face is probably the quickest way to break your fingers, so if you’re inclined to remind greasy, cowardly white supremacists that they’re not safe in your city, might I suggest forearm smashes, palms, and elbow strikes instead? They tend to hit just as hard/harder and don’t carry as much of a risk of injury. Maybe take some yoga classes so you can limber up and put your foot in their hate spewing teeth?

It’s easy to get caught up in the moment, but let’s be smart going forward folks.

the nerdy guide to fitness

It’s definitely going to suck at first, but you will accidentally have fun, I promise. Okay folks, this whole sedentary lifestyle thing isn’t working anymore. It’s definitely going to suck at first, but you will accidentally have fun, I promise. Get moving! 

  • Exercise is anything that elevates your heart rate or takes your body outside of its normal comfort zone- you don’t have to go to a gym to do either one
  • Don’t use exercise as an excuse to eat junk! Bad food decisions don’t cancel out. 
  • Yoga/stretching is the easiest way to get your blood flowing with minimal effort
  • Running or biking is a close second 
  • Consistency is way more important than cramming in 3 miles in one day
  • if you’re doing cardio, follow up with a cool down stretch or light jog. Take care of yourself!!
  • Exercise after your school/workday is over (instead of taking a nap). You’ll have more energy to tackle homework, and you’ll get a better night’s sleep. 
  • Make a playlist filled with super bright and obnoxious songs. Works every time.
  • If you use the Pomodoro method to study, try to fit yoga/stretching into the breaks. 
  • If “regular” exersize isn’t your thing:
  • Take 5-10 minutes to dance enthusiastically in your room, that’s so much better than nothing. 
  • Get creative with your friends. Instead of meeting for coffee, go on a hike, frisbee in the park, etc. 
  • Small things like taking the stairs instead of the elevator do add up. 
  • If you drive, park a little farther away.
  • Keep track of your steps. My phone’s health app has a pedometer but they’re really cheap on amazon- please don’t splurge on a Fitbit. 

xoxo, Niya

i’m cute but psycho, she says. she smiles at me.

in my backpack are sixteen emergency items for panic attacks, for shutdown mode, for in case i can’t stop urges i can’t control, in case i am in trouble. i have under my bed razors i can’t bring myself to throw out, even though i’ve been recovered for ages. i forget what i said to him after i say it. i don’t mean any of it, but maybe i did. am i steering this ship or am i just a passenger on it.

i put the hot in psychotic, she says. i hear her laughing.

i can’t feel my lips. back when the hallucinations were bad i didn’t tell anyone but him, because i knew what was happening. when i woke up in a hospital i tried to kill the doctor. my therapy group was full of wonderful people. the girl who was schizophrenic had a beautiful singing voice. i can still hear her crying sometimes.

normal people scare me, he says. i know it’s from tv.

we faltered on the edge of bad things. when he tried to burn his house down he didn’t know what he was doing. he’s being charged as an adult, they tell me. when he saw me looking he said it was his responsibility. the girl with split personalities is sweet. her trauma rendered her largely unable to speak. i sit outside with the other three who raid our own bodies and we pluck flowers and play a game: what if i’d been born normal. what if i had been given executive functions. what if i hadn’t been given depression in bucketfuls until it overcame my lungs. my parents don’t know how to look at me anymore and neither do my friends. they all tiptoe around me like i will break at any second.

try yoga. it’s just a phase. we all feel that way. you have so much to be thankful for. someone has it worse. mentally ill people are dangerous. therapists aren’t real doctors and by extension you have no real problems. go for a run. just choose happiness. you’re not really sick. you’re faking it.

i lace my shoes. it’s nice to have laces back. i will try to work out without letting myself get back into my disorder, but we all know how well that will go. i have been working out since i was six years old. yoga is on my schedule but it’s never active enough. there’s a good chance that out of the people in my group, one of them is being taken advantage of. we are so quick to give ourselves out for the safety of others. the boy who, like me, has burn scars on his skin - he tells me his girlfriend likes that he’s sick. it makes him sensitive. the girl who is schizophrenic gets picked up by her father. i know he hits her. she says she kind of deserves it.

sadness makes for good art, she says. i don’t look up.

when they ask me where i’ve been i say i’ve been out of town. i feel fine thanks for asking. i don’t know who i am when nobody’s looking. i don’t know if i’m even real anymore. i don’t know how to get close to people because they’ll end up finding out and hating me for it, or i’ll be a burden, or they won’t know how to handle it. my family never brings up the hospital again. sometimes i think i dreamed it. 

you won’t find love until you love yourself, he warns. it’s been a long day.

i’m so alone.

2

I’ve been a member of some good gyms in the past. I love a good spinning class; I love a good aerobics class. I go to yoga classes as well as practicing myself. I’m always open to new experiences and when I’m in different cities shooting, I try some local classes sometimes. So, whatever’s around, really. I think classes can be the most fun. And if you want to make it a social thing and you want to go with friends, then that’s the way to do it. Or if you’re a loner and you like to go off and run on your own, do that. There’s no right or wrong, exercise is exercise and it’s incredibly healthy for you and, you know, society. And it’s a positive thing, so however you want to do it, each individual to themselves.

some very important Christophe Giacommeti & Viktor Nikiforov headcanons:

shoutout to @lavenderprose who has the same brain as me when it comes to YOI/Viktor hcs

  • Chris and Viktor have been friends for 10+ years. if the scene with Viktor at juniors is his last year as a junior, that means they met when Viktor was about 15 and Chris was about 13. They have almost certainly been through Some Shit together and know the other one better than they know themselves.
  • every year at worlds, the night after the free skate, regardless of the results, the two of them buy 3 bottles of shitty wine and watch whatever movies they’ve been texting each other about throughout the season. The Notebook, Pitch Perfect, The Avengers, whatever it is, they get wine drunk and MST3K the hell out of it after the medal ceremony.
  • (they keep doing this even after Yuuri – actually, Yuuri was invited one time but couldn’t quite get the hang of the banter. you can’t make up 10 years of friendship for 6 months of dating, no matter how in love you are.)
  • They are fully aware of the idea that they’re dating/have dated/are sleeping together/have slept together etc.  They think it’s hilarious. There’s even a ship name for it – Viktophe – and they regularly browse the twitter tag and send each other screenshots of the funniest ideas.
  • they also read the RPF about them to each other in hotel rooms during events
  • that meme where one person bursts into the room like “I knew you were having sex” and one of the pair is like “oh no one told me I would have put down my book”? that’s them.
  • They have biweekly bitchfest skype/phone calls where they just dish on whatever dumb shit has happened to them recently.  
  • When they were younger and Viktor still had really long hair Christophe would fix it for galas and events. He really liked to try out pinterest/youtube tutorials but didn’t have a model so Viktor would volunteer, then show up to a sponsorship event with like a hairbow updo.
  •  you’d think Yakov would hate him considering the both of them 100% are terrible influences on each other re:acting like drama queens, being massive flirts, buying lululemon yogas with “peach” emblazoned across the ass
  • but actually Chris is a really good influence on Viktor in more important ways. i.e. ensuring he doesn’t kill himself and making sure Yakov knows to keep an eye out on him.
  • there have been at least 3 times Chris has called Yakov at an ungodly hour of the morning insisting he go check on Viktor because he was very worried that Viktor was going to do something stupid
  • chris is almost always right about this. yakov has found his star skater on the ledge and had to coax him down and into the shower more times than he’d like to admit. chris knows viktor, knows his tells, knows when he’s starting to get bad again
  •  by the time they’re 20 and 22, yakov goes to chris if he’s worried about viktor’s mental health but viktor won’t talk about it.  no one’s ever said it aloud, but they all know that Chris may well be the reason Viktor is still alive
  • tl:dr – chris has been worried about his best friend for a long time and when he sees how viktor lights up with yuuri, he gets to breathe easy for the first time in a long time
little ways to cope with stress ♡

➳ make silly faces in the mirror

➳ take a bubble bath

➳ pet a friendly puppy/kitten

➳ dance to your favorite song

➳ eat a rainbow of fruits (& veggies)

➳ take a long nap

➳ read some story books

➳ build a blankie fort then fill it with stuffies & fairy lights

➳ visit a toy store (or several)

➳ watch your favorite movies back to back
➳ give yourself a makeover
➳ color color color

➳ listen to lullabies or soft music

➳ do some yoga
➳ make snow angels

➳ pack a picnic
➳ cook some macaroni & cheese

➳ go on a long walk or scavenger hunt

➳ paint a picture frame or flower pot

➳ go to an animal/exotic bird sanctuary

➳ cuddle up with a bottle/binkie

➳ cry cry cry

➳ put together a puzzle

➳ eat a lollipop (or several)

➳ make a mobile with ribbon & paper
➳ bang together pots & pans

➳ build a block castle
➳ play dress up
➳ build a snowman

➳ go to an art/science museum

➳ bake cupcakes or cookies

➳ visit a candy shop (buy some sweets)

➳ make homemade hot cocoa

➳ brush your teeth & hair
➳ play cute online games

➳ buy a new toy or coloring book

➳ set goals then celebrate them

➳ watch funny youtube videos

➳ make a collage of cute photos for your wall
➳ set up a bird or chipmunk feeder
➳ stay in your jammies all day
➳ have a tea party with your stuffies
➳ make a new “imaginary” friend
➳ marathon your favorite cartoons

6 Paths to a Better Life

Sometimes my life starts to feel a little like a whirlwind - a lot of moving parts that I don’t seem to be fully in control of. When I start to feel a little overwhelmed with everything, I sit down and write myself a life plan. I generally divide my life into the following categories - Physical, Emotional, Skills and Hobbies, Career, Financial, Spiritual. Beneath each category, I write a small summary of what I’m doing well, and what I’d like start doing or do more of. 

Physical
Start with your nutrition. Are you eating a balanced diet that is rich in colour? Your groceries should be vegetable and fruit heavy, with some free range protein (eggs, fish, red and white meat) and dairy as required. The more colour in your groceries, the better. Don’t forget lots of natural fats to help you absorb the nutrients in your veggies and meat. Natural fats like olive oil and nuts are essential to a balanced diet. 

How are you feeling about your body? Don’t be afraid to take control of your fitness and sculpt your ideal body. Yoga and pilates are great ways to feel stronger and leaner in just one week. If you can’t afford to go along to classes, there are a range of fitness apps that offer free workouts. Try a few out and see how they feel. 

Emotional
How are you feeling day to day? If you’re feeling exhausted, anxious or sick of a rollercoaster of both, get back to basics. Are you getting 8 hours of sleep every night? Are you logging hours before midnight? The hours prior to midnight are the most restorative, so get to bed earlier and wake up with a clear mind. 

What’s your inner talk like about yourself? Do you talk to yourself in a way you would never talk to your friend? Negative self talk is a surefire way to leave you feeling like you’re failing at this thing called life, so turn your talk around. Try sitting and writing a list of all the things you’re grateful for in your life. Your soft bed, or your relationship with your grandmother, or your fun co-workers - it could be anything. 

Skills and Hobbies
How are you feeling about your capabilities? When we are in school we’re learning at such an accelerated rate that we can start to feel invincible, like we could do anything. When we finish school we aren’t testing ourselves day to day like in our education, and we can forget how capable we are. Don’t be afraid to take up a new skill, like learning another language (Duolingo is a free app!), learning how to draw (endless Youtube videos at your disposal) or playing a team sport (usually cheap or free). It will remind you of how capable you are to take on a new skill and how great you can be.

Career
How are you feeling about the way you make money. Are you working part time or casually in a job that is not your career? Don’t forget that this is just temporary, a method for you to make income, and you don’t need to invest yourself 110% into it. See it for what it is, a great place to make friends, make bank and stay busy. 

If you’re working in your career, map out your goals. Where do you want to be in exactly 12 months? Same role or different? Share your goals with your boss or superior if you’re feeling confident and you’ll be surprised by how verbalising your goal solidifies it. Then map out your five year plan. Where would you love to be in 5 years? Same company or different? What does your pay pack look like? Keep this somewhere in your room and revisit it occasionally to keep you focussed. 

Financial 
How’s your money situation looking? Are you in debt? Mapping out your debt and deciding upon a weekly repayment is the first step to financial independence. It can be hard to discipline yourself to do this, but the freedom of living debt-free is amazing. Set up a bank transfer and don’t look back. 

If you feel like you have nothing left over, consider taking on a little more work (as long as it doesn’t compromise your mental wellbeing). I took a Saturday night bar shift at my favourite bar last year to save for my overseas holiday. It worked for me because it meant I was drinking less and making money while still feeling like I was out. 

Spiritual
This one is always tricky because it’s completely up to you how you choose to satisfy your spiritual side. Maybe it’s an early morning walk to get a coffee, or maybe it’s watching a weekly TED talk on Youtube, or maybe it’s borrowing a book from the library once a fortnight and reading it under a tree. Spirituality is really dependent on what brings you peace and solace, and it’s different for everyone. Think about the times you have felt the most at peace in your life and seek to recreate them on a smaller scale. Being centered is a really good state for you to be in to take on your life. 

Once you have your plan, it’s a lot easier for you to see the stuff you’re doing really well and the stuff you might want to change. Keep it in your room and revisit it every now and again. It will encourage you to keep focussed on improving while celebrating yourself for your wins. 

guide to becoming relatively productive when you’re not doing anything
  • draw something using the paint tool on your laptop
  • reread a book that you like and reevaluate if you still like it
  • write a poem that does not rhyme if you always write a rhyming poem and a poem that rhymes if you’re more of a free-verse poet.
  • go for a walk. alone. and try to pick some wild flowers on your way home for pressing.
  • exercise. stretch a little bit. work out a little.
  • calculate your monthly dues and see if you’re still financially stable
  • try to exercise your breathing (buteyko exercises), find your inner peace, and/or do yoga
  • make cute little playlists for future purposes
  • play with your cats, dogs, and pets and give them a little bubble bath
  • go to a coffee shop from another neighborhood
  • and sit beside a stranger, also a little challenge: befriend them
  • explore a new place; may it be a cute little city or a strange little town
  • visit an airport and sketch a couple of strangers- their figures and stuff.
  • visit the neighbor that you never had the chance to talk to.
  • talk to your old friend, that one friend that you “never talked again”
  • clean your room, change your sheets, or rearrange some of the furnitures/stuff in there
  • ask someone out- may or may not be the person that you like
  • try to learn something- a new language (the basics and alphabet)
  • plant a tree or a plant
  • sign up for an environmental organization (that may or may not be focusing in saving the bees)
  • try to immerse yourself with a new lifestyle and try to appreciate it
  • sew some of your clothes incision close
  • do a little embroidery of your fave thing on your fave shirt (even if you don’t know how, yes, google it up)
  • write a letter to 30-year-old self
  • make a cute video using your phone
  • reevaluate your life choices- do you like the current you
  • make a little something for your best friend
  • do some little diys/craft from pinterest
Mindful December study and self-care challenge

Okay, so here is my December study and self-care challenge! It’s thought to be motivational and habit-forming, but bear in mind that everyone works differently and is involved in a different field, so if you need to make adjustments to this challenge to fit your personal needs, then do it. Feel free to adjust this and view it as a source of motivation and inspiration. Also, you don’t need to this in the right order. The most important thing about this challenge is that you get to know yourself better and find peace while moving in the right direction personally. 

You can dedicate daily posts to this challenge in which you elaborate the questions, but of course its also okay to post nothing at all or just on selected days where you feel like you have anything to say, especially because this is a very personal thing. If you decide to post something, you can tag them with #al study challenge. I’d love to read about your experiences! 


1. Tidy up your study space and make a mind map of things that you want to accomplish this month, as well as a list of deadlines for December and January. Keep in mind that a clean study space needs to be kept up with during this challenge, so it’s a daily task to keep it neat. Also, remember to drink enough water or tea during this challenge and to sleep well. 

2. Do you have a big project coming up? I need to write a 15-page-essay, so this needs a lot of preparation. Make a mind map for that big project as well. 

3. Create a study routine plan, so that you will accomplish your goal and make it realistic. You know yourself best, so make up a plan that you’ll be able to stick to. Set up the goal of doing at least one thing a day. Of course, more is fine, but don’t overwork yourself. 

4. Start planning your days in the morning (or in the evening before), if you don’t already. Also, try to be mindful. How are you feeling today? What are your plans besides studying? You don’t need to study for 5 hours straight because others do. You can, but it’s not necessary. It’s also fine to take a day off in case you’re not feeling well. Just do some little thing, a short assignment or a reading that is fun. Keep that in mind.

5. Meditate for at least 10 minutes. Sit or lay down comfortably and focus on your breath. Try to control your thoughts by trying to think nothing or of a specific word or thing. It doesn’t matter if it doesn’t work right away. 

6. Try the pomodoro technique for doing a task that you don’t really like and have problems focusing on. You study for 25 minutes, and then do a 5 minute break. Repeat this, and take a long break after 3 or 4 sessions, or stop studying, if you’ve accomplished your goal for the day. 

7. Record yourself reading out some of your notes that you need to remember, go for a walk and listen to it. Did this method work for you? Do you remember more? 

8. Don’t forget that project you’re working on! Read through some literature or do some more revising. Check your progress, and make adjustments on your planning or your mind map if necessary. 

9. Time-log your day to become mindful of what you spend your time on. Eliminate obvious distractions. Remember that it’s perfectly fine to do pointless things just for fun in between, but your daily life shouldn’t be centered around playing Candy Crush. 

10. Do something study-related that has to do with other people. Study with friends, start a study group or read an essay of someone else to see how study methods of other people look like or how they think differently than you. Try to pick something up that you remember and learn from. 

11. Try out a different study space and see how well you do there. You could work at the library, or in the kitchen instead of your desk, or at a café. Reflect how you did there, and you were able to work out more effectively, think about changing your study space. 

12. Declutter. Make space in your room, and therefore space in your head. You could sort some things out that you don’t use anyway, and either throw them away, sell or donate them or gift them to someone. There are great Facebook groups for doing that.

13. Do you move your body regularly? Doing some sort of fitness activity strengthens your ability to discipline yourself, but also your brain and muscles. Try it out! Go to a local gym and do a free trial training or look up workouts on Youtube. You can try Yoga, Pilates, or more challenging stuff like HIIT (High Intensity Interval Training). 

14. Check the apps on your phone. Which do you spend most time on and why? Are they useful in any way, or are they a waste of time? Could you download some more apps that could help you reach your goals, like drinking more water? Remember day 9.

15. How does your sleep schedule look like? Is it regular? Try to go to bed earlier and get up earlier or later and see in which direction your productivity levels go. 

16. How do you motivate yourself? Have you already established a method that works for you? If you don’t need motivation for studying and can rely on your discipline, that’s great, but a little motivation doesn’t hurt anyone. You could make a vision board or watch study videos on Youtube, for example.

17. Have you thought about trying something new in the past weeks or months, like learning a new instrument or language? Why don’t you give it a try? 

18. Do something for your body, as this self-care concerning your outside will also reflect on your inside. Buy or mix your own face mask, take a long and hot shower or bath, put on make-up or put lotion all over your body. Do something you’re comfortable with.

19. In the past 17 days, you have implemented studying into your routine. Did you have any distracting thoughts? If so, what were they about? Were they centered around a special topic? In which location are you able to study best? Think about those things to improve your productivity.

20. What have you procrastinating for the longest time? Do it, or at least start doing it. If you can’t make yourself do it, at least try to start and say yourself you’ll do it for five minutes. Try to do five more, and so on. How do you feel afterwards? 

21. Read something for enjoyment. Light up a scented candle, make yourself comfortable and enjoy the book. 

22. What is your favorite planning method, and which have you already tried? Which didn’t you try yet? Maybe it is time to find out what method is the most effective for you personally. 

23. Watch a documentary that widens your horizon. Either on Netflix, Amazon Prime, Youtube or any other platform you can think of. Suggested topics: Environment, consumerism, nutrition, animals, science.

24. Do you have a personal book which addresses personal development? Which is it? Who, would you say, could this help, and with which issues? What did it help you with? If you haven’t read one yet, why not do some research? You don’t have to buy a book if you don’t want to, of course. 

25. Reflect: What has helped you personally, and in your studies and what didn’t? Maybe repeat some daily challenges on the remaining days of the month. Remember to enjoy the end of the year, make yourself a nice time and don’t pressure yourself too much. Have a nice New Year’s Eve and Christmas, in case it’s celebrated in your culture or in your life or family, personally. 

Working with Earth

Originally posted by pizsimokus

Our Earth is beautiful and majestic. There are many ways that you can connect to our beloved world because it is one of the two elements that you can actually touch. I love our Earth, feeling the vibrations going through my body is one hell of an experience. 

Here is a list of different ways to connect to our Earth. 

  • Go outside. Whether you have a special place in your neighborhood, your backyard, or a park; go to that place and sit there. Place your hands on the Earth and feel the heartbeat vibrate through you. 
  • Do yoga outside, with a mat or not (your choice). Let the Earth steady and form you. 
  • Plant a garden. Fill your space and let it flourish. NOTE: Be mindful, plant things that won’t harm your health or others or pets. Do your research. Gardening takes time, patience, and all of your love. You must dedicate yourself. 
  • Take a walk and collect what comes to you. NOTE: Be mindful. Do not collect anything harmful to your health, do your research and keep a notebook or a book on you that can help you identify plants. Only collect items that happen to fall upon your path. Do not pluck, pull, rip, cut. Not only is it disrespecting, it will hurt the plants and not let them grow properly afterwards.
  • Make a special Earth altar, preferably facing North. Fill it with colors of greens and browns, special items you have collected, crystals, rocks, coins, Mother Earth symbols, statues of trees, etc. Anything that is related to Earth. 
  • Make a sigil that means “I connect to my bountiful Earth and protected by her arms.” or something along the lines. (Again, I am not a sigil maker but something I would like to include for others who are) Wear the sigil on you as you go on walk or take hikes.
  • Be respectful to animals. (I feel) they are messengers of the Earth, (I feel) they watch us for a reason. 
  • Talk to the trees. Learn from the wisdom they have to offer. 
  • Research Gnomes, they are protectors of our Earth. NOTE: Like working with any spirit, do your research and be respectful. I don’t have any resources to give with working with Gnomes but here are a couple ways I have personally used. 
    • Leave offerings (like flowers or rocks you have collected in the past or food like bread) inside a tree or under a rock. NOTE: Be careful, make sure you are not disturbing an animals home.  
    • Leave currency (coins) to offer respect for all they have done to keep our Earth stable. NOTE: Make sure you do this somewhere that others won’t steal your offering. Make sure it is hidden where only Gnomes can get to it. EX. under a rock or if you have a backyard have a special place in the corner of your yard for this kind of offering.
    • Be kind to the Earth. Don’t liter, recycle, and show them you are one with the Earth. They care and respect seeing how we can be caring to our Earth.
    • Join a volunteer group that helps to clean up our Earth or make your own group. Check local listing online for your town.

Elements: 

Air
Water 
Fire

Who Should You Fight: The Bright Sessions Edition

(idk if someones made this already BUT)

Dr. Bright

Chance of winning: 40%

Homegirl’s a doctor, not a fighter, and im pretty sure theres something in the Hippocratic oath about “do no harm”, but is it for therapists? see rating. She could possibly psychoanalyze her way around you and maybe manipulae you for her own goals, and she’s been taking yoga classes so she’s probably really flexible. If youre fit, go for it. 

Sam 

Chance of winning: ???

She’d probably get so anxious that she’d time travel and where would that leave you? Alone and with no one to fight. In any case, why would you ever??? Let her rest, she’s been through enough. 

Chloe 

Chance of winning: 0%

Listen. She’s a telepath, she knows youre next move before even you do. You can say “oh shes just an art student!!” all you want but consider: she’s a sculptor and can probably take your eye out with a scoring tool. Do not attempt. 

Caleb

Chance of winning: 10%

Dude’s a football player, so he’s pretty darn ripped, and probably fast too. Can literally sense fear, will use that to his advantage. Only attempt of you want a challenge. 

Adam

Chance of winning: 90%, but at what cost?

This child is an emo wreck and will end up crying on the floor if you hit him, which is not fun for anyone. Also, his boyfriend will 100% beat you up for it, so theres that. And I will also beat you up. Leave this boy alone. 

Damien

Chance of winning: 0%

listen I know what the rating says, and we all know why its like that but please, p l e a s e fight Damien, everyone will cheer you on. You’ll fail but it will be glorious. Fight Damien. 

Mark

Chance of winning: 50%

He seems like a pretty normal guy? that rating goes up or down depending on what atypical he’s near, but in a fair one on one throwdown? average joe. Go for it for a fun time, he’ll probably take you out for ice cream and a beer afterwards. 

 Agent Green 

Chance of winning: 99%

PLEase fight him it will be easy and hilarious. The guy is a bureaucrat and needs to file forms in triplicate to get authorization to throw down, so time is on your side. Fight Agent Green. 

Wadsworth

Chance of winning: 0%

Don’t do it. 

Self care is good for the skin

My mental health has a huge impact on my physical health, and of course my skin and acne. I have to be mindful to keep my stress levels low in order to be happy and healthy. Here are just a couple of self care tips that I use.

1. get a cup of tea. Fruit tea, green tea, camomile tea, spearmint tea are all good options for your skin. ☕️

2. Go for a walk. Often if I’m feeling down about my skin or something I just wallow in my room, a quick walk round the block really does me good. 🏃‍♀️

3. Appreciate things. If you see a rainbow stop and stare, if you spot a cute cat stop and play with it. Slow yourself down. Allow yourself to stop and appreciate things.🌈

4. Talk to someone. Your parents, partner or friend or whoever, talk to them about how your feeling that day. Or just chat about tv shows or the weather. Talking to people helps me feel less alone and just overall more positive.👭

5. Journal. Whether it’s a skin journal or an emotions journal or just accounts of your day it’s good to get it out on paper. You can throw the paper away if you need to after but writing it out feels cathartic.📔

6. Write out your routine. From skincare to brushing your teeth. Write out what you do and what order you do it in for the morning and nighttime. This stops you from forgetting things and gives you a structure to work to. 🗓

7. Try meditation or yoga. This might not be your thing but just try it. There’s lots of beginner guides on YouTube.💆

8. Have you remembered all you medication? Take your meds and supplements if you haven’t. They could be contributing to you feeling low. 💊

9. Water. It’s an easy way to help your body and skin. Drink your water. 💧

10. Go to bed on time. Beauty sleep is real people. You’ll be helping your health and your skin by getting an early night.🛌

I’m gonna be honest. I hate mornings. I’ve always wanted to be a morning person – to wake up early and energized and hop out of bed with no problem. But, instead I wake up most mornings just wanting to go back to bed. Luckily, you don’t have to be a morning person to have a productive morning.

waking up

  • Getting out of bed is the hardest part. Start with a realistic time to set your alarm – the days I set my alarm for 6 with good intentions are the days I turn it off and sleep way late. I’m much more likely to actually get out of bed if I set it for a little later. 
  • I like to use an app like Sleep Cycle that wakes you up gently.
  • Or go old school and use an actual alarm clock, and kick your phone out of your room altogether. 
  • As soon as you get out of bed, get dressed and make up your bed. You’ll automatically feel more productive and you’ll be way less likely to go back to sleep. 

first things first

  • It’s hard to be productive on an empty stomach – eat some breakfast as soon as you feel up to it. 
  • I find it hard to eat in the mornings, so I’ll usually have a light snack of fruit with coffee when I first wake up, and then eat something a little heavier around 10.
  • Get moving! whether it’s yoga, a quick run (i salute those of you who can run in the mornings), or just a couple jumping jacks. 
  • Get ready for the day before you get to work. This way you 1) feel more ~human~ and productive right off the bat and 2) won’t have to stop working to get dressed later when you’ve gotten into a groove.

get to work

  • Check your planner and make plan for the day
  • Get all your supplies and your space ready
  • Fill up a water bottle so you can stay hydrated!
  • Put away distractions (install a site blocker if you need to!)
  • Put on some music that makes you feel happy 
  • Knock one or two little tasks off your list first, then go on to the hardest task/one you’re dreading
  • Don’t forget regular breaks so you don’t feel burnt out by lunch!

Tim Drake’s New Years Resolutions:

  • Figure out a way to successfully prank Damian
  • Learn to take short naps, not drink a pot of coffee to get through the day without crashing
  • Get passing grades in school with going to class as little as possible
  • Do more yoga because he isn’t flexible like his siblings
  • Stop using memes to communicate when he isn’t comfortable with the conversation
  • Get Bruce into The Clash
  • Comment “first” of every single one of Jason’s photos even if he is not the first
  • Have a permanent blanket fort in his bedroom
  • Voluntarily eat one vegetable a month
I’m Not A Kid: Part 3 (Final Part)

I’m Not a Kid: Part 3 (Final Part) (m)

Word count: 7.7k

Genre/Warnings: angst, smut, dirty talk

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Summary: You finally face Jungkook after he moved away, three years ago.

Parts: one | two (3/3)

It had been three years since you had laid eyes on Jeon Jungkook. Not that you had been keeping count. It was somewhere near almost three. You two were going hot and heavy in secret for two years. Jungkook went to college while working for his father part time. Luckily for you Mr. Jeon had his son working with you most of the time. The two of you actually worked very well together. Then the day came where Jungkook graduated and he came and worked for the company for about half a year but then his dad decided to open, and wanted Jungkook to manage another branch, in another country.

You were devastated to say the least when you had to hear about it from the whole office and not even your boyfriend, Jungkook. Of course you thought the rumors were just that, rumors. But then you had went into Jungkook’s office and he wasn’t there. All of his stuff had been taken out and you just stood there. You remember the feeling so vividly, it made you sick to your stomach. 


You ended up going home early and there he was, on your couch with tear stained cheeks. You have never seen him this vulnerable. The two of you normally were not very sentimental or too open with each other. But there he was, crying on your couch as you made your way over to him. He held you so tightly after he pulled you into his lap. The two of you holding each other so closely while you slow fucked on the couch. You remember how tightly he held onto your hair as he whispered in your ear, that he loved you. That was the first and only time you had heard it. Because after being in sad, sweaty and naked ecstasy- he was gone.

You woke up on the couch with a blanket draped over you and all of his stuff out of your apartment. The two of you didn’t live together but you did miss his toothbrush next to yours and all of his protein powder in your cabinets, among other things. You even missed all the anime on your DVR. You missed him but even more you hated him.

He had never said goodbye or told you he was even leaving in the first place. At least he barely did that one night. You didn’t even know how much time he had left to be with you until you woke up alone. You just wish that you had known or maybe if you were open about your relationship he would still be with you. But you hated yourself for wanting to go back into the past and be with him. 




The first year was the hardest. All you wanted to do was call him or have him call you. But then it finally set in that he had left and you wanted to beat the shit out of him. You wanted him to feel the pain that you felt. You wondered how someone who was so keen on getting you to go out with him in the first place could be such a major ass. If you had stuck with your instincts you would probably be fine, in a better relationship and happy… then again you could’ve ended up with someone like John. The guy that you had ended up leaving at the party when you finally let yourself be with Jungkook.

Maybe this was meant to happen or maybe you were just stupid. Finally around the second year you tried not to think about Jungkook as much. Although it was pretty hard when your boss was his father. After time though you didn’t actually think about him… not that much. Luckily since the man that you once loved, but never told him, father was your boss you knew whenever he would be coming into town.

If you ever figured out that Jungkook was coming back home you went on vacation, on a business trip or just called in sick. You remember in the beginning that Mr. Jeon always told you that Jungkook had asked about you or wondered if you were doing well. Jungkook was also apparently the reason that you got promoted and we’re basically Mr. Jeon’s right hand gal. You had gotten one email from Jungkook giving his congratulations but you deleted it. Maybe it was your petty side but you didn’t want to indulge yourself or parade yourself with questions on whether or not it meant something more.

You got an even bigger office and Claire was also happy to move up as your assistant. She got paid a couple dollars more so she was happy. Work was good, most days. You were making more money and you ended up moving to a bigger and nicer apartment. Mostly because your roommate was getting married. It was hard, you were so used to having someone around all the time and now you were lucky to have her pick up the phone if she wasn’t busy.

It was most times when you were at home, alone. Feeling sorry for yourself or just wanting to know if he was okay that you would end up on Facebook or Instagram or anywhere he posted anything slightly revealing. You would see pictures of him with new friend’s or younger women. It was so hard to look at but you couldn’t help yourself. You tried to put up photos and make statuses just to seem like things were normal in your life. You mostly did it because you wanted him to see that you were fine. Not that you thought he was actually interested in knowing. You were sure he was busy enough with his own life and you should’ve been focusing on yours.

Things did get better with time. You had even dated someone for a little while but it was hard. You really loved being around Sehun but he was so young himself. He got very jealous if you did things without him or just when you were around other men. He was very whiny when you had to stay at work late. He just looked great on your arm and that was what you were focused on. You hated that maybe you weren’t focusing on actually being happy. You had pretty much engulfed yourself in work since Jungkook left so you didn’t really know how to make time for others. You thought he was so beautiful and sweet but you knew it wasn’t going to work out between the two of you and after six months you just had to let him go.

Every once in awhile you would get something from Jungkook. You figured this was when he was feeling lonely or alone like you. After a while you just deleted them or sometimes you kept them just so you could see him. He would send you pictures of himself whether it be his face or his body. He had even sent you two videos over the course of three years. You had never retaliated, too scared that maybe he would never send anything again if he knew you felt the same. Or you were just scared because maybe he wanted to trick you into seeing if you still missed him enough.

One video was of him and his office still wearing his suit while he touched himself. You could hear him grunting as he worked his hand and you would close your eyes and remember what it was like to hear him in you. The other one was last year when you made your and Sehun’s relationship public, changing single to in a relationship. The video was of Jungkook fucking another woman. You remembered the first time you saw, you were angry and sad that he would do something like this. Then again it had been enough time the second time it came around you laughed. Seeing that only made you want to forget him even more.

You figured he was embarrassed with himself because that was the last and final thing he had ever sent you. In a way you were happy but a part of you like getting to see him and his sculpted body. You guess it was just a way that he kept up with you. Even when you were too scared to send anything back. He seemed to be doing well for himself and you respected that. His dad was very proud of him and you were proud of yourself. Even with the help of Jungkook, you were truly paving your way in the business and you were a force to be reckoned with.

By the third year, you really didn’t think about Jungkook much. You were dating here and there. You had ended up going on a couple of dates with one guy that you particularly liked. You spent a lot of time with Jimin and Taehyung. Jimin, being the best and most supportive friend ever. It was very easy to be yourself with him and his fiancé. You ate a meal every Sunday with them and you even went to your yoga classes with Taehyung every Tuesday and Thursday. You had really fallen into a schedule that you enjoyed.

Today was different though, you could feel it in your body that it was different. Your phone had turned off in the middle of the night and you were almost late for work, just starting the day off wrong. A part of you told yourself to just call in but you knew you had a meeting with a big client and you wanted to go ahead and get that over with.

You were in such a rush that as soon as you got into your building was the only time you had to turn your phone back on. When you turned it on you had received multiple texts and calls from Jimin but the slowness of your phone turning on wasn’t helpful and when you finally got to your door, Claire had mentioned someone was in your office waiting for you. You looked at your watch, thinking that your client was slightly early. Rather than having them wait you went straight into your office.

When you walked in and looked at the back of the head sitting in the chair facing wall, you knew exactly what was. You looked down at your phone seeing the text finally was working clearly, pressing on Jimin’s name and reading.

[From: Jimin 8:30 am] He’s here, don’t come.

[From: Jimin 8:45 am] Jungkook randomly showed up.

[From: Jimin 8:54 am] Y/N?

You looked up as Jungkook turned slightly, hearing the door open and close. He stood slowly and smiled as the two of you made eye contact. You were very shaken, not knowing how to feel or what to say so you just stared at him.

“Y/N,” he sing songed, making chills fly up your arms. Wow, you look even more beautiful than I remember.“ Jungkook smiled, standing still but having the strongest urge to go and touch you.

It was silent for a moment but you couldn’t  keep one question in, “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“It’s lovely to see you too, darling.” He chuckled and this all just felt like a game to you. It seems like all he wanted to do was screw up what you had worked so hard to keep normal.

“Really, Jungkook. What are you doing here? Normally I know when you’re coming in.” You said you walked over to your desk and put your bag down.

“So that’s why you’re never here when I’m here.” He said with a sigh.

“Do you really think that I want to be here when you’re here and see you? I was hoping I would never see you again.” You huffed as you got your work out of your bag, standing there with your hands placed on your desk as you looked up at him.

“To be fair, I did call and I even stopped by your old building but I was told that you had moved.” Jungkook sat again and you stood there.

“You really came to my old apartment building? Why the hell would you do something like that? Like I would actually want to see you? Like I would want you to just show up?” You looked at him and he looked down at the ground. You were angry, you thought that you had pretty much coming over it but you were very wrong. You could not believe that he was sitting there right in front of you and all your old feelings just came back into play.

It felt unfair that he could just walk in and you were already taken by him. It was like the beginning all over again. You had to pretend to hate him just so your true feelings wouldn’t peek out. “Plus I changed my number. When I broke up with my boyfriend he wouldn’t stop calling and leaving me voice messages of him singing.”

Jungkook looked back up at you and you swallowed. “That’s right, I forgot about your boyfriend.”

“It was almost a year ago, sometimes I forget about him too.”

Jungkook forced a smile as he played with his hands. “I was happy you found someone.”

You stood there for a moment before you started laughing. Jungkook looked up at you, questioning why you were laughing. “Is that why you sent me that video of you and that woman?”

Jungkook rolled his eyes and put a hand through his shiny black hair. “I was jealous, I’m an asshole.”

“Why were you jealous? You left me. You were the one who just walked out. What? You were jealous that you didn’t find your new love first? Because it took me a goddamn long time to trust anyone after that shit that you pulled.” you slammed your fist down onto your desk.


Jungkook bit his lip as he stared at your desk. “No, of course that was not it. It was selfish, I didn’t want you to be with anyone but me.”

You huffed out a laugh once more, “That is the biggest crock of shit I’ve ever heard.”

“It’s true,” Jungkook said standing up and making you lean back as you stared at him for a moment.

“I’ve seen you with plenty of girls.”

“When?” He laughed, “In pictures?” He stared at you for a moment and you just nodded. “It was only a fucking picture that you saw. You have no idea. There were plenty of people who wanted to go home with me but I couldn’t. And maybe if I did go home with someone their name wasn’t the one I was shouting out.”

“Am I supposed to feel sorry for you? You did this to yourself when you left.” You said harshly.

“You think I don’t know that? I was a stupid 23-year-old kid. I didn’t know what the fuck I was doing. That’s what my mom did, she acted like everything was fine and then she left one day.”

“How did that make you feel when she left? If anything, you should have known that you were upset and sad and you thought about her all the time. That was selfish, you know all about being selfish. I’m supposed to say, poor you because you got to move up and go somewhere else and be surrounded by women who you fucked but got their name wrong? Screw you, Jungkook. You did this to yourself. We both need to get over this bullshit. Besides you’re just going to be going back soon anyway so what’s the point?” You sat down and Jungkook leaned over your desk to get closer to you.

“That’s not true. My dad is opening another branch 45 minutes away from this one. I let my successor take over the other branch and now I will be the head of this new one. I already moved back to the city yesterday.” You felt yourself getting sick to your stomach. “I will be here all week doing some training.”

Suddenly there was a knock at your door and you pushed Jungkook away as you sat. He chuckled to himself, reminiscing the times that you were pushing away while the two of you were in each other’s office and someone knocked or decided to come in.

It was Claire, “Ms. Y/L/N, your client is here to see you. Would you like me to bring him in?” Her eyes shifted between the two of you as she wanted to know what was going on.

“Yes, bring him in. Jungkook was just leaving.” You said and Jungkook nodded.

He started leaving before he turned around and looked at you, “I’m in my old office if you need me.” You just nodded as he left and your client came.


It was so hard for you to focus all week. All you could do was think about the fact that Jungkook was right down the hall. And for some reason all you wanted to do was get up and go see him. You didn’t even know what you wanted to say. You just wanted to look at him. You just wanted to touch him and make sure that he was real. It was crazy to you that maybe just maybe he wanted to be with you again.

During the first couple of days you tried your hardest to stay away from him. Although when you left your door open to get in some fresh air, you would see Jungkook walk by several times and pretend not to look in and see you. It really was like the old days where he would bother Claire to see your schedule and he would sit next to you in meetings.

He didn’t try stuff like he used to, although you could tell he really wanted to. There were some times where out of the corner of your eye, you watched his hand hover to touch you or his mouth would get really close to your ear to whisper something but he would soon back away. Most times he just watched you from afar as you watched him.

He would always be in the elevator with you when you went out to lunch. He’d somehow end up right next to you pressed up against you in his form fitting suit that showed off his figure. Sometimes he would even walk around the office without his jacket on and you could really tell that he had been working out more. You watched as he would make coffee and you could see the outlines of his muscles in his shirt. Pretty much every girl in the office would walk around just to see him in those tight shirts.

Jimin had made fun of him to his face but only was trying to hide the fact that he too thought Jungkook looked good. You tried to ignore that every girl wanted. Especially Claire who was engaged but though Jungkook was trying to win her back like she had even had him in the first place. It was times like these that your pettiness only made you want to fire her just for the stupid things she said.


It was hard, trying to ignore him. But of course since he was back his father and your boss wanted some of that magic that the two of you used to give. ‘You both work so amazing together and I need the best for this account.’ That’s what you remember hearing before you are pushed into your office with Jungkook. You remember seeing Jimin try not to laugh as the door was closed.

Jimin had walked you to your car every day because you had asked. Not wanting someone to persuade you to go home with him. “Do you really need me to walk you to your car? I mean you are a big girl, Y/N.”

“Well, yesterday he asked me if he could come see my new place. So yeah, I do need you to walk me to my car. Because next thing I know I will be on my kitchen counter with my legs above my head while he fucks me. I know myself, Jimin.”

“You think that maybe you need to get it out of your system? I mean he’s only going to be at a firm 45 minutes away. Plus he’s living downtown where you live. Do you think that maybe you just need to just have sex and get it over with and maybe the two of you can move on?”

“You know I am surprised. To think that my best friend wants me to go back into the hands of someone who hurt me so badly.”

“I think you did your fair share to him when you told every girl he was in a picture with for the first year that he had crabs.”

You rolled your eyes, “I was in a state of grief.” Jimin just laughed, “Plus I later apologized… anonymously.”

“This is what I mean. Your whole relationship was very sexually driven. Maybe the two of you just need to fucking talk about your feelings. That’s what Tae and I do.”   

“Could you just tell me more about your sex life and we don’t have to talk about anything else?”

Jimin chuckled as he rubbed your arm. “You’re going to have to talk about it with him. The two of you won’t be able to settle until it’s done.”

“How often do you top?”

“Jesus, goodnight!” Jimin walked away and you laughed. But now here you were in your office with Jungkook, in silence. You didn’t really know what to say but you knew you needed to say something. Jimin was right at least on your behalf. You needed to know why he did the things he did before you can truly get over everything.

“So I got these mock ups and they should be ready tomorrow afternoon. I think everyone is gone for the night,” Jungkook scratched his head. “You probably wants to get out of here. I’m sure you have better things to be doing.”

“This is my work. This is what I need to be doing.” You spoke, watching him as he flipped through the papers and laughed at  what you said.

“That’s just it. You were always so focused on work. I could barely ever get you to do fun things with me.”

“I did plenty of fun things when I could. Work means something to me.”

“I know it does and you’re fucking brilliant at it. I just wish you wouldn’t stress yourself so much. You should get out more, meet people. You remember the first time you gave in to me? When we ended up going to a club and you left that stupid date of yours. What was his name…”

“John.”

Jungkook looked up at you and smiled. “John, that’s right. I remember we ran into him that one night when we went out to eat. I remember him looking at you and talking to you. Sad looking guy.”

“Yeah, and then you took me to your apartment and tied me up. You were so jealous for no reason.”

“I know, it was fun though. One of the best nights of my life. Probably the best sex I ever had too. I just remember you telling me, ‘only you. I only want you.’”

You shifted in your seat uncomfortably. Reminiscing on these memories just made everything feel so real.

“Then again, it’s really hard to choose what the best sex of my life was. I mean anytime I think about it you come to mind. You in general are just the best sex I’ve ever had. That first night in the club,” Jungkook chuckled to himself and shook his head. “I can’t believe you let me fuck you in the bathroom. Then I got to fuck you in your office.”

You felt yourself getting wet so you crossed your legs. Not wanting to show you remembered those nights distinctively as well.

“Then we stayed at work those long hours and I got to fuck you on the kitchen counter in the break room. I even fucked you in my dads office. But my favorite definitely have to be on the photocopier.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at that one. “I remember that. I got a really bad cramp in my back.”

You and Jungkook say there and laughed before he spoke again, “We haven’t broken in this newer office…”

You stared at him and for a moment you were baffled that he even said that to you. Then you realized the child that was in front of you. “You’re such a kid. You know sex is all you think about.”

“I’m not a kid and you know it.” Jungkook sat up.

“Why did you leave?” The four words had slipped out. The question you have been dying to know for three years. “Why did you just leave like that? Why didn’t you try with me?” And finally, “Why did you leave me?”

Jungkook saw the sadness and the pain in your eyes. “I knew you would be angry. I didn’t think that you would want to try. I thought you might try to keep me here and I knew you wouldn’t want to go with me.”

“But you didn’t even ask? You thought you knew me so well. Hell, I thought I knew you well. We didn’t know shit about each other. When we fought we just had sex. When we were sad we just had sex. We fixed everything with sex and that’s not a relationship. I thought I knew you but there were times I was in bed with you, I felt like I was in there with a stranger. Sometimes I woke up next to you and I would just feel dirty.”

Jungkook nodded in understanding, “I get that. There were lots of times I just wanted to open up and talk to you but I didn’t want you to think that I was a kid.”

“Jungkook, talking about your feelings does not make you a kid. It makes you human. Feelings are what makes people fall in love. Feelings are what makes people who they are and all I wanted to do was know you.”

“I’m sorry, everything I did was so shitty. All I wanted to do was apologize but you were right. I was just a kid. I didn’t know how to act or what to do. I took the one thing that was good and I fucked it up because that’s what I do. I- I hated myself for hurting you and not talking to you about anything. The first time I came back I came to your office and you weren’t there and my dad said that you had requested to go on a business trip and I thought that it was pretty clear. It was very clear that you didn’t want to see me.”

“Well, what do you expect me to do?”

“No, I don’t blame you.” Jungkook got up and went over to the side of your desk where he had always loved to sit when he would come inside your office to bother you. “I didn’t realize how I was acting and I was so in love with you. I’ve never been in love before and it scared the shit out of me. Like I said good things that happened to me, I fuck them up and I just knew it was going to be sooner or later before I fucked up our relationship. I guess in a way, I thought I was protecting you or saving you from me… but I just hurt us both. When I wanted to fix it you didn’t want to see me and I just took the message.” Jungkook looked at the floor before saying, “I’m sorry. A thousand times, I’m so sorry. I was such a dick and I really did act like a child, especially when I saw that you were happy with someone else. All I wanted to do was make you happy and I just hurt you.”

You swallowed and closed your eyes. Your body was overwhelmed. Even just hearing him say that he was sorry, well, your body wanted to console him. “Thank you, Jungkook.” You looked over at him and he looked at you. “Thank you for saying you’re sorry.”

“I really missed hearing my name come from your beautiful lips.” You looked at your desk and couldn’t help but bite your lip. “Your voice in general… it’s like I’m home.” He smiled and you closed your eyes. “I missed you,” he whispered, leaning closer. “Did you miss me?” You looked up at him and shook your head. He laughed, “No? Okay then, if you want me to I’ll go.”

You looked over his features for a moment and you knew him well enough to know that he wasn’t going to leave, no matter what. “You just want to fuck me?” You asked. “This is going to be completely like it was last time? We know how well that turned out.”

“I don’t think we acted like a couple because we weren’t out in the open like a couple.” He looked at you but you waited for him to finish. “Of course I want us to be different. I still work for my father but I’m not going to work here. I want to be open about this I want to tell people. I want you to be mine and I want to be able to show people that. It was always so hard for me to stay quiet when I saw other people looking at you. I wanted to fight for you and now I can. I love you and not a day goes by that the feeling has changed. We might not have known each other that well before but I want to spend my life getting to know the real you and even the real me. I want you to see me for who I am. I want you to know all of me. I want you to be able to love me.”

“You really want to do this? You could get some backlash-”

“I don’t give a shit about that. You’re what I’ve wanted and what I’ve needed for three years. If you even think about giving me half a shot I’m going to run with it.”

“Fine, it’s what I want as well.” You said and Jungkook excitedly bent down to kiss you but you stopped him. “If we’re going to start over and do this. We’re going to do it right. You’re going to ask me on a date and I’m not gonna put out. I want to learn about you, I want to get to know you. I want to hear stories of you being on the other side of the country. I don’t want to forget our past but I want to make new and better memories.”

Jungkook held out his hand to you and you took it. You both shook on it, “Can I take you out tomorrow?”

“I’ll have to see if my schedule’s not busy.” You laughed and he rolled his eyes.

“You do have to take breaks from work to be with me, okay? You always focused on the work rather than me.”

“It’s a two-way street. We both have to focus on work and we both have to make time for each other. I will try my best.”

“I appreciate that,” you both smiled at each other before suddenly Jungkook sat on your desk closer to you. “So… I really can’t kiss you right now?”

You laughed, pushing him off your desk as you gather your papers and put them in your bag. Walking out, “Goodnight, kid.”



By the third date you hadn’t put out. Of course you didn’t count the fact that Jungkook got so worked up that he ate you out under the table. Saying, 'Fuck dessert, you were always sweeter anyway.’ You ended up waiting until the sixth date. Which surprised you but made it so much more worth it. You really felt like you were getting to know each other and you were content.

You both were making it a point to see each other as well as work. It was delightful to come to each other’s apartment after work with take out or groceries and eat together. You loved to watch Jungkook cook. It was beautiful to be vulnerable with each other and then make love on every surface of the apartment. It was all exciting and for the first time you felt like you truly belonged with someone.

Eight beautiful months had gone by. After three months, just to make sure that you were both serious about each other, Jungkook told his father. His father was confused but delighted. Figuring that, that was the reason why the two of you work so well together. Of course it was just a matter of time before the office found out and Claire had awkwardly congratulated you.

Sometimes for lunch the two of you would meet in the middle of the two offices at a small diner off the interstate. It was those kinds of times that made your relationship special. You still thought that he was so young but it made you feel young as well, at least in some cases. It was nice and it just felt right, being with him. To think, you hated him at first and then you went for another long time hating him. It wasn’t all easy though now that you two were together. There were of course times where the two of you didn’t get along or worked too much and ignored each other but you worked it out. And when you worked it out, most of the time, it ended in amazing sex that came right after. You thought you were never bored of sex with him in the first place and now you knew you never would be.



You two we’re going out to a club, the club where the two of you hooked up for the first time. You went out just to have fun but in the middle of dancing your night was interrupted when Jungkook saw Sehun. He knew the guys face from a mile away since he had stalked your instagram and knew a lot about the two of you. He knew that it was a long time ago but he was very protective of you.

Sehun saw you and came over to you both, talking to you for a minute. Making a joke, you had a thing for younger guys and you laughed. Jungkook on the other hand was not so pleased. “Hey man,” Jungkook started walking towards him but you stopped him.

“Nice seeing you. Have a good night!” You waved while dragging Jungkook out and to the car.

“I don’t see why you dated him.” You went over to your side and got in. You liked riding in Jungkook’s BMW, it was a black convertible and just an exciting car. Always fun to ride in with the top down. The two of you got in and Jungkook started the car, driving off.

“He was cute and young.”

“A kid,” he said as he got into the street.

“You’d know about that.”

“Fuck you,” he laughed.

It was silent for a moment before you spoke. “I met him at a coffee shop. He accidentally knocked my drink out of my hand and paid for me to have another one. It was like a scene out of a movie.”

“Eh, well you didn’t end up with him.”

“Life isn’t a movie. You don’t just end up with one person. Life plays out, it doesn’t just end like a film.”

“I guess you’re right. I just like thinking you’ve ended up with me…” You smiled, thinking the conversation was over but it was far from that. “So, what was he like in bed?”

Your eyes were wide as you looked over at him. His eyes still focused on the road. You shook your head before you smiled, “Boney, but uh- it worked for me.”

“Did it?”

“Yeah, like I was surprised he could handle me on top of him. He’s so thin but he really fucked like a jackhammer.” you laughed, half joking.  

“Watch it,” Jungkook said and you chuckled.

“He was good, you’re good too.” You focused on the road with him.

Jungkook scoffed, “Just good?”

You smirked to yourself, “Well you’ve been awfully busy working lately. Maybe I’ve forgotten…” you said innocently and he quickly looked over at you before pulling off the road and parking the car slightly next to some trees on a side street. You looked around nervously, dropping the act. “What are we doing?”

“Just good? You know you can’t say shit like that to me. You know I’m not gonna be able to wait until we get home to show you that I’m much better than good.”

You giggled, “Come on kid, I want to go home. We can even go to your apartment. You know I was just messing with you.”

“In the backseat.”

“What?” You looked at him, annoyed at the fact his stupid male ego got hurt so quickly.

“Get in the backseat and I’ll show you fucking good,” Jungkook whispered as he moved toward you. “So, get in the back seat. Now.”

You looked him up and down. The tone of his voice made you feel like you were headed to toe 20° hotter. “Yes sir,” you decided to move back there.

“Mh, good girl.” Jungkook slapped your ass with a chuckle, making you jump as you fell back into the backseat.

“I don’t want to get caught by a police officer.”

“Really? Where is my fun girlfriend to doesn’t mind doing it in public places? Remember the time we fucked in Jimin and Taehyung’s bathroom while they were having that party.” Jungkook pulled you onto his waist. “Where’s she?”

“I’m right here,” you said, looking down at him as you started to circle your hips against his as a deep breath came out of him.

“I know you like doing it in public. Don’t try to hide. Plus we’ve never done it like this before. He grabbed your ass and a giggle escaped. "I love your ass. It’s the perfect size for me to just hold and squeeze.” He said as he squeezed it and you moaned as your crotches brushed up against each other over and over. “Let’s get you out of this dress.”

You nodded as he lifted the material over your head. “No bra? Mh, that’s pretty sexy.” He smirked and you took off his shirt.

“I want you out of those pants, come on.” You said and he chuckled. You got off of him and he told you to face you body against the backseat. You did as you were told, letting your heels slip off as Jungkook reached down to help you take off your thong. He made sure his warm strong hands brushed over your sensitive bundle of nerves along with your wet folds, making your body jump.

You slapped his hand and he smiled at you as he then rubbed your wetness as well as his rock hard dick, making your eyes roll back. You had been staring at the veins on his arms which were making your heat wet but this was really kicking it up a notch.

“Y/N, are you ready for me?”

“I think I can handle it,” you said sarcastically.

“If you say so,” Jungkook said as he, no warning, pushed himself inside of you. Making you gasp and yell, “Jungkook!”

“You said you could handle me. Although, sometimes you can barely handle me. Remember that time I fucked you so hard in the shower and it was so hot in there that you passed around and I had to carry you to the bed? Or that time we made love on my dad’s washing machine at that dinner with his friends while they were in the next room. You were trying to be so quiet but failed.”

“Yes,” you whimpered as he was slowly moving inside of you as you got comfortable. He was big but he felt so perfect inside you. Jungkook put one hand around your throat as he picked up the speed, really starting to fuck you doggy style. He brought your body closer to his as you arched yours. “Yes, oh god. That feels so good.” Your hand went to his thigh as you wanted to feel his strong body pounding into yours.

You could feel the car shaking as Jungkook’s grunts and groans were echoing across the vehicle. “You love when I choke you.” You shook your head and he grinned, “You’d let me do anything to you. My baby is such a little slut for me, huh?”

“Watch it,” you copied him from earlier and he chuckled.

“The fact that you’re letting me take you from behind in my car just proves what a dirty girl you are for me. I love it.” He held onto your hips as your body’s moved quickly together. The sound of your skin slapping together filled your ears as you moaned happily. He gave your ass a slap as he licked and bit your shoulder.

“Yes! Right there, right fucking there.”

“Here? Am I hitting that spot inside you, baby? The one that makes you sing so sweetly for me.”

“Yes, Jungkook, yes. Oh my god, fuck. Jesus Christ that’s it. Give it to me, Jungkook. Harder!” you clawed and he tanned skin of his leg.

“Shit, Y/N.”

“Mhh, fuck-” you gasped at how fast his hips were moving. Jungkook was thrusting inside of you so hard you were screaming out for him in the small space of the car. You were grabbing onto the seats and the windows and windshield were fogged up. You reached one hand behind you has it tangled into his beautiful black hair. “Jungkook, Jungkook yes!”

“Fuck, Y/N. Your pussy is always so damn tight. I should fuck you more, harder, huh? You love when you have a strong, young cock inside of you, don’t you? My dirty, Noona. You fucking love it.”

“I do, I do! Jungkook, you feel so good. Please, I’m so close.”

“I bet Sehun never fucked you like this. I bet he never made you feel as good as I did. He didn’t get to love and worship your body like I get to.” Jungkook’s hand gripped one of your breasts and pinched the nipple as the pleasure shot through your body, making you jump and giggle.

“Jungkook, no one has ever made me feel like you do. No one ever will.” Your eyes were closed so you could focus on not coming yet. “You always make me feel so fucking amazing. My body can’t take it. It can’t take all the pleasure.”

Jungkook gave you a couple of particularly hard thrusts. “Fuck, you feel so good.” You tightened around him, knowing how much he loved it and he shouted, pulling your hair and making your head fall back into his shoulder as his other hand was still on your neck, squeezing, sending you closer and closer to the edge. “You’re such a filthy girl for me, letting me take advantage of you like this in the back seat of my car, on the side of the road. You love the way I’m just taking you, right here. The fact that I can’t even wait until we get home. I just had to have you now. You’re my weakness, your just so fucking good. You’re all mine, all mine Y/N.”

“Jungkook, please.” You pleaded.

“What, baby? Let you come? Come all over my hard cock that’s fucking you just how you like? You want to come all over my cock and I’ll come inside this pretty little pussy of yours…”

“Please, come inside me. You know how much I love when you fill me up.” You begged with a moan as his dick twitched inside of you.

“Holy shit, baby. Come for me, come while anyone could see us.” He whispered the last part and you screamed his name as your eyes shut tight. Jungkook released his hand from your throat and he held onto you tightly, coming inside of you. His moans and grunts making your body shake as you both collapsed in bliss.

It took a moment for the two of you to finally get enough energy to set up in the backseat and grab your clothes. You both looked at each other and giggled as you could have fallen asleep right then and there. 


“Did that do it for you?” He asked as the two of you got dressed in the backseat.

“You always do it for me. You know that I love you. I’m in a constant state of euphoria with you.”

“Sometimes it amazes me that you do. I always loved to annoy you.”

“Yeah, you definitely were annoying but you were what I needed. I think I was what you needed. So I am happy that one night that I gave into you and went to the club. But I’m even happier that we kind of got a second chance.” You smiled as he buttoned his shirt.

“I love you.”

“I love you too. Plus who am I supposed to keep it spicy in the bedroom with now that I’m really getting old.”

“Trust me, you’ll always have me to make you feel young.” Jungkook said and you laughed. He sang your name as he got in the front seat and started the car once again and you smiled to yourself. Never in your life you thought that the annoying kid that followed you around, singing your name. Or asked you out on a date at least once a day, was going to be the person you probably would spend the rest of your life with. And while life wasn’t a movie you were definitely ready to see where this one goes.