yes i am quite bitter the game ended the way it did

accelerate; one

pairing: reader x bts

genre: literally everything, college!au, fuckboy!bts, asshole!namjoon

warnings: cheating, slutshaming, alcohol, virgin shaming?, angsty, namjoon is rude as, fuckboys

author: admin m


Min Yoongi wasn’t your type, not today, not tomorrow, not ever. He lacked worry, he lacked care, and most of all, he lacked an appreciation for loyalty in relationships. Ah yes, the last year of college and he was still a fuckboy. His black hair and soft smile drew girls in, ridiculously so. Didn’t fool you, though. Nothing could draw you into such a slimy, cheating man. 

So, when you did find the one, it was of course, the man on a complete different spectrum than Yoongi. Kim Namjoon swept you off your feet with the charms of a charismatic salesman- the less annoying, pushy kind, of course. He had made the last year of college bearable, and the friendship you had forged trickled into a romantic escapade, filled with gifts and flowers. Namjoon cherished you, made you feel like the most adored princess.

Curtains blocked the sun from your eyes as you rested upon your single bed, listening to your beloved roommate Lisa complete her attack on her boyfriend’s sex techniques. Too much tongue? Didn’t let her cum enough? You weren’t sure which one it was. Being a virgin yourself, you often felt out of touch with her when she discussed her sexual rendezvous. You hadnt gone further than the handy you had given Lee Jihoon in grade nine behind the bleachers. He hadn’t even came, tucked himself back in his pants still hard and running away shyly. Good times. A sudden silence and Lisa slipping beside you on the bed pulled you from your memories. “Y/N, look at this, and breathe, okay, gorgeous?” You cocked an eyebrow as she passed you her phone, open on a random girl’s instagram. She carefully clicked the story feature. God, time couldn’t have passed slower. The latest update on her story was her grinding against your boyfriend, Kim Namjoon himself. He was chuckling, gripping her thighs, as his friends cheered him on. (You recognised the voices of Jungkook, Seokjin, Hoseok, Taehyung, Jimin, and lastly, Yoongi.) Yoongi’s presence was noted due to the fact Namjoon had hidden you from the older man in fear of him coaxing you with his fuckboyish ways. Hypocritical, you thought bitterly. The video quickly disappeared, and so did every thread of trust you had in your body. “Y/N, babe, it’s okay, okay? He was an asshole..” You nodded numbly, turning over with a huff. Options played through your mind quickly. Ignore or confront. Ignoring seemed easy, bitter, harsh. Exactly like his actions. Good.


Every night since that stupid day was the same. Drinking, crying, and most importantly, ignoring Namjoon. Classes were a blur, mixing with the smell of vodka and lack of hygiene. Namjoon was studying literature, unlike you, who was studying psychology, so luckily, you avoided him during class time. Every attempt of contact was shunned, leaving him clueless. 

It was a Friday, and so far, you were doing okay. You had managed to sober up somewhat- defensive when Lisa claimed the clear liquid in your waterbottle was definitely not water, because, okay, maybe it was vodka, but also, it tasted bitter and burnt your throat and made you feel alive so who gives a flying fuck? You were prepared for a weekend of sleep, Lisa reminding you all week she would be at her boyfriend, Minghao’s,  and for gods sake, Y/N, take a shower. The final lecture ended, and you scooted out, making your way towards your dorm. It was a brisk walk, but long enough to be stopped in your tracks by six familiar, smirking boys. Park Jimin, pretty with pink hair and a cardigan. Kim Taehyung; a tall, slim brunette with a killer jawline and boxy grin. Jung Hoseok, radiant skin splashing against his black hair, a contrast that never failed to confuse you. Jeon Jungkook, a freshman who had weaved his way into the fuckboy orgy with his boyish good looks and athleticism. Kim Seokjin, the broad shouldered gentleman who Namjoon told you had broken more hearts than he had fingers. And finally, Min Yoongi, a ghostly looking man whose raven hair matched whatever heart he had locked up in his chest. You’d attended high school with them all, excluding Jungkook, and knew them well. They were typical fuckboys, just like Namjoon had turned out to be. The group had avoided you most of your high school career, especially Namjoon, until the start of the previous year, when they’d suddenly flocked you like a moth to a flame. In this case, you almost believed they were the flame. They had known your boyfriend had been cheating yet couldnt be fucked saying a single word. Maybe they knew you were too naive, maybe they wanted to hurt you. Or maybe, just maybe, the relationship was simply a game, entertainment for the seven men. They eyed you curiously, taking in your appearance. Your usual preppy, prim and proper clothes had been disregarded for leggings and a slouch sweater, hair in a messy bun that showcased your exhausted face. Stress acne littered your skin and quite honestly, you looked a hot mess, minus the hot, and probably minus the mess too, because it was far worse than that. Jungkook was the first to speak, whistling low. “I must say, Y/N, after what I’ve heard about you, I wouldn’t expect to see this. Avoiding Joon so you can what, get drunk and slut around? Smells like it, anyway.” You felt fury build in your veins. Stupid fucking fuckboys. “Cat got your tongue, Y/N, or is what Namjoon suspects correct, and your mouth is swollen from sucking too much dick?” Hoseok’s bitter words made you sick.

“He cheated on me.” The boys looked at you, confused.                                     “Louder, sweetheart. Not all of us are accustomed to your cutesy silent shit.”     You snapped. “He fucking cheated on me, you fucking dicks. He went and grinded against that girl, he went and did that shit. All the while I am in the dark about it all. Not a simple, ‘hey, Y/N, your boyfriend of almost a year is sleeping with some random girl off campus,’ no, of course not. You had your fun, didnt you? Messing with the quiet kid in your classes, poor little naive Y/N. Fuck off, don’t come near me again.” You spat, glaring up at each of them. Their expressions softened, smirks dropping. “Listen, Y/N, we’re sorr-” you shook your head, cutting Taehyung off. “Oh, and tell your stupid little gang leader that the next time we talk will be the last. I want you all out of my life.” And with that, you left the six boys, abandoning whatever streak of calm you had left.

Arriving back at your dorm, you sat at your desk, sobbing quietly. The pictures you had of you and your friends and Namjoon were thrown everywhere as you held back the urge to throw up. Everything was fucked. Your pity party was drawn to a close when a knock on the door sounded, and without hesitation, you swung the door open. Behind it stood Kim Namjoon. Kim Namjoon, with his soft silver hair and oversized glasses. Kim Namjoon with his big thrasher hoodie and tight jeans and big hands that you yearned to feel on your skin. Kim Namjoon who had disregarded every moment you two shared. Kim Namjoon who had fucked everything up. You grunted, shaking your head. He gazed at you sadly. “Please let me explain, please, I just, I was horny and-” you waved a hand in frustration. “So you decided to be a manwhore and cheat on me when you could’ve easily come to me, you know I would’ve done whatever to make you happy.” You muttered, shutting your eyes. He nodded, moving closer to you, attempting to grip your hips in his large palms. You pushed him away. Namjoon stood back, waiting for more. “Why? Why didn’t you just come to me, instead of whoring around and cheating on me-” He cut you off, anger evident as he slammed a fist against the doorframe. “Nobody wants a fucking frigid virgin to fuck, Y/N!” Your heart dropped, mouth forming a tight ‘o.’ He realised his mistake, tripping over himself, his words jumbling out a frantic apology. You stopped it, smiling sharply at him. “You’re right, Kim Namjoon. No one wants a frigid virgin.” And with that, you slammed the door on him, locking it and crawling into your bed.

Monthly Reads | January 2017
❤ THANK YOU TO ALL WRITERS FOR YOUR HARD WORK AND SHARING YOUR STORIES! ❤

Special mention⭐ & Top 5 + 16 more stories under the cut:

⭐ 2017 HL Prompt Challenge ⭐

“A small group of us came together to do a prompt challenge with fast deadlines to have some fun and see what we can do, and this is the result. Hope you enjoy!”
Authors: taggiecb, afirethatcannotdie, QuickedWeen, waytoomanypeopleintheaddisonlee, Awriterwrites, allwaswell16, LadyLondonderry, lululawrence
Prompts so far: Foundation, Bloodsucker, Hinge, Scream (revealed today)

Where Your Heart Is

by anhcor & tvshows_addict | College AU | hate to love | slow burn | 154k

Louis is ready for his brand new adventure. So what if he suffers from a genetic condition that prevents him from being touched? College is going to be awesome. It has to. Karma kind of owes him right now. Forget about his overprotective mother, or Liam– his entirely too chipper step brother– or his mess of a roommate. Forget about the gloves he has to wear at all times. He’s here to expand his knowledge, write and drown himself in books – No matter how distracting ‘Hallway Boy’ may be– The obnoxious, flirty frat wannabe determined to become the bane of Louis’ existence.
Or, a college AU set in San Francisco where two lost boys who seemingly have nothing in common find inspiration, each other, and themselves in the process.

Black With Autumn Rain

by whimsicule | thriller | crime | magical realism | 93k

“Thank you,” Geoff says, taking a sip of his tea. “What did you tell him?”
Louis has a sip as well, lets the tea burn down his throat too quickly, too hot, and he feels it all the way down to his stomach. “The truth. Essentially,” he replies after a moment, licking his lips, relishing the slightly bitter taste of the brew that’s never quite strong enough for Louis’ liking. At least it’s not decaf. “That my dog scented it. That I didn’t touch the body. That I came here first thing.”
Geoff nods pensively. “Did he believe you?”
“Probably not. There’s only so many people who can drown on dry land before it gets fishy.”

or: Harry is a journalist, Louis has lots of secrets and the moors aren’t exactly the ideal place to rekindle a lost romance.

Hold My Heart

by Awriterwrites & phdmama  for H/L Exchange 2016 | famous/non famous | Mile High Club | Actor!Louis | Doctor!Harry | 14k

“Excuse me, mate, I’m the window seat here.” The voice was soft, apologetic, and accented in something a bit unfamiliar — northern England, maybe, Harry thought.
“Oh,” Harry jumped to his feet and moved aside, “I’m sorry, I didn’t see you standing there.”
The other man laughed as he swung a bag into the overhead compartment and slid into the seat. “You were well caught up in that book, mate. What are you reading?”
Harry paused, wondering how to explain the fact that he was reading an epic and x-rated romance that was the story of a relationship between a prince and the man he’d enslaved. “Oh, you know, just some fiction my sister recommended.” He turned to look at the man and froze.
Sitting next to him was Louis Tomlinson.
***
Or, the one where famous Louis Tomlinson offers his hand and a lot more to his seat mate on a transatlantic flight.

What do you mean he’s coming?

by MediaWhore for HL Famous/Not Famous Fic Exchange | Childhood friends | famous/non famous | actor!louis | photographer!louis | 15k

When Harry accepted to be his sister’s Maid of Honour, despite how non-traditional of a choice he was, he didn’t think writing a speech for the wedding reception would be this hard. Now, not only does he have less than two weeks left to find something moving and inspirational to say, but Gemma just confided in him that her old childhood best friend is going to be in attendance. The one who moved to LA and they haven’t seen in fifteen years because he was too busy becoming an Academy Awards winner. But hey, no pressure. It’s just Louis Fucking Tomlinson.

Harry is screwed.

Singing to tiny dancer

by BriaMaria | Famous/Non famous | Actor!Louis | 22k

“Yes!” Harry punched a fist into the air. He laughed at the confusion that wrinkled the little space between Louis’ brows.
“What?”
“You’re flirting with me,” Harry smiled, letting his dimples pop.
Louis’ face went blank for two seconds and then he rolled his eyes, one side of his mouth lifting. “Am not.”
“You soooo are,” Harry sang out, poking him in the shoulder. “You like me.”
“I was simply showing you how to actually bring… what did you call it? Your A-game.”
Harry adopted a patronizing expression, sure it would piss him off. “And you did great. Really.“
“Oi, fuck off,” Louis said, but he was actually laughing now. Outright. It was gorgeous and Harry wanted to live in this moment forever. It was the very best one he’d experienced. He wanted to always remember the image of Louis’ crinkled eyes, the sound of his breathy giggles, the smell of citrus that radiated off him as he swayed in his amusement. And Louis didn’t even know his name.

Or … When everything gets to be a bit too much for A-list actor Louis Tomlinson, he runs back to the town he had never really called home and the boy who was the only one he did.

Keep reading

Tommy Shelby walked into the London house, tension leaving his shoulders as crossed the threshold.  London had been a gamble.  A huge gamble.  Tommy was all in at this point, in more ways that one.  He wasn’t goign to come out of this alive.  Not if Major Campbell had his say.  Tommy didn’t particularly care if he lived or died.  He’d been living on borrowed time since the war.  His own life meant very little.  But Tommy would be damned he’d let Campbell win.  If Tommy ended up in a grave when all this was said and done, he’d make sure that Campbell was in the ground with him.

Between the expansion an his mission for the inspector, Tommy couldn’t sleep.  Not in Small Heath.  There were too many plans, too many permutations, too many contingencies racing through his head.

But this house was his refuge.  It was only when you were with him that those burdens seemed far enough away to allow him to breath.  It was only beside you that he could manage to sleep for more than two hours at a time.  You were his sanctuary, his port in the storm.  You had been since this whole mess had begun.

Keep reading

7 Years - BadBoy! Jeon Jungkook X Reader - Part 16

Part 16 already!?

This came out kind of late because I got a little bit carried away with writing. I can’t help but cringeeeeee at the end. Omg please tell me if you do too because I will actually change it if I have to.

Thanks for reading and supporting too! Love you guys 💗

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9  Part 10.1  Part 10.2  Part 10.3  Part 11  Part 12  Part 13  Part 14  Part 15  Part 16 - Here  Part 17  Part 18  Part 19  Part 20 - Final


Taehyung would have to remain in hospital for at least two more days so you decided to somehow make his stay more bearable. Your initial idea was to bring some game consoles like your Nintendo which in the end you went through with since Jungkook had informed you that Taehyung enjoyed playing action games a lot. You took it upon yourself to search for games you knew he’d be able to enjoy to the fullest and although it took most of your afternoon, the joy that spread across his face was completely worth it.

Obviously, you couldn’t stay with him as you had to return to school the next day so after bidding him farewell, you started on your way home. As you were coming to the end of your walk home, you noticed two boys hanging around on the other side of the street, both beaten up quite badly. It took you a few seconds for you to realise there was a girl with them too, shamelessly flirting with the taller of the two. It wasn’t hard to connect the dots and make out that these were the two boys Taehyung had gotten into a fight with, whom later got their revenge.

You couldn’t stand to look at them whilst knowing what they had done to your friend and all the grief they had caused. The group was a mess when Taehyung was admitted into hospital and to see these two boys laughing and having fun made your blood boil. Maybe it was because you didn’t fully understand how gangs worked but that didn’t matter to you when someone who was trying to help, although maybe in the wrong way, had ended up getting seriously hurt.

Your eyes followed the movements of the girl who was now flicking her hair over her shoulder. Did she perhaps not know how dangerous these boys could be? Or was she the type to uselessly get involved with danger and bring a bad name to herself?

Anyhow, You were sure she looked familiar.

-

Arriving at school the next day, you walked straight to Areum’s class. You hadn’t had time to meet her in person since you arrived back in the country. Entering her classroom, you spotted her sitting beside the window and mad your way over.

When you reached her, you placed your hands over her eyes and leaned down beside her.

“Guess who?” Areum gasped in joy whilst removing your hands from her face and you shared a brief hug before you sat down on the desk in front of her own.  

“How was your trip Areum? Did you take loads of pictures?” When her hobby was mentioned, her face brightened even more and she nodded enthusiastically.

“Loads! I ran out of space halfway through though and had to delete a lot.” You were in the middle of replying when a certain student caught your eye.

It was the girl from the day before, the same one who had been flirting with the two boys who ended up putting Taehyung in hospital. So that’s why she seemed familiar, she attended your school.

“About a month ago there was another problem with a girl getting harassed. She goes to our school and she was begging me to help her, to pretend I was dating her or something”

But it can’t be her, why would she be blatantly flirting with the same boys she was supposedly getting harassed by? Unless…

“Maybe she’s the wrong girl…” Areum looked back and forth between you and the girl before deciding to snap you out of your thoughts.

“Why’re you looking at Na Young? Wrong girl for what?” Slowly drawing your gaze away from the girl you now knew as Na Young, you decided to fill Areum in on your thoughts.

“Tae is in hospital because he was attacked as revenge for protecting a girl that goes to this school. I saw her yesterday with the same boys Tae got into a fight with. Am I jumping to conclusions or is that weird to you too?” She seemed shocked at your explanation and you realised that you hadn’t actually told her anything about what had happened. Areum didn’t press for details however and instead began to sneak glances at Na Young.

“I don’t know… she’s a great student like you but she gives me weird vibes. Doesn’t seem like anyone else feels the same though.” In all honesty, Just looking at her made you feel cautious. She suddenly turned her attention to both you and Areum, shooting a kind smile. Your mouth twitched into a smile out of politeness and you glanced at Areum who was mirroring your expression.

You wouldn’t have been all that bothered if Na Young’s smile didn’t seem more forced than your own.

-

Taehyung had somehow managed to call you during your lunch break, claiming that your Nintendo had ran out of battery and requested that your being your charger. A charger is something you should have brought in the first place but your thoughts were scattered and it completely slipped your mind.

You had ended up agreeing to bring it after school which was why you were currently searching your drawers for it.

“Looking for this?”

You spun around to find your sister swinging the charger, a blank look on her face.

“I’m not even going to ask how you knew I was looking for that.” A slight smile graced her lips and she walked into your room, handing you the charger before looking up at you with the most innocent look she could muster.

“You’re sixteen now, that’s just creepy to look at… what do you want?” She dropped her innocent expression and stood up straight, attempting to come across as confident.

“I want to go visit Jungkook’s friend Taehyung at the hospital too.”

You blinked once. You blinked twice.

Your younger sister had only ever met Taehyung once and that was when he came over to your house to pick you up and hang out with the boys. Then you suddenly remembered how he had left a lasting impression on your sister. She practically looked up to him and it wasn’t a surprise since most of the time she acted childish and loud. You supposed she bonded with him quite quickly once she noticed how he had a similar mentality to her.

In other words, you believed she had a slight crush on him.

“Oh… if you want to I guess.” A grin quickly spread on her face and she raced back to her room to get ready.

What had you just agreed to?

-

The hospital reception was exceptionally empty this particular day and you headed straight for Taehyung’s room, your sister in tow.

Upon arrival, you knocked a couple of times, entering when you heard a reply from the other side of the door. Inside you found Taehyung sitting up against the headboard of the bed and a smiling girl sitting on a seat beside him. It was only when you drew closer that you realised said girl was Na Young.

“Y/N! My guardian snack angel is here!” You couldn’t help the smile that creeped onto your face as a result of Taehyung’s own contagious smile. Na Young meekly smiled from her side of the room and you stopped yourself before you furrowed your eyebrows.

So you were right then. She was the girl Taehyung stood up for. But then why was she with the two boys who she ‘oh so desperately’ wanted to stay away from?

“Hello Y/N. It’s nice to finally meet you. Taehyung is always talking about you and how your his favourite girl friend.” You sensed poorly hidden bitterness in her tone and by the way Taehyung’s eyebrows shot up, he sensed it too.

Brushing it off, you walked further into the room and placed your bag down on the table beside his bed before deciding to reply.

“Well, I am technically his only girl friend aside from Areum.” The smile never dropped from her face but you noticed a slight twitch on the corner of her lips. Turning towards Taehyung, you leaned down to give him a hug which he returned with joy.

“I brought you the charger and some snacks too. Wait, I won’t get in trouble for feeding you all these snacks, will I?” He shrugged his shoulders as he dug around the bag you handed him, pulling out a packet of crisps and the Nintendo charger.

Finally remembering you brought a guest, you glanced at the sort to see your sister peeking her head around the side of the door.

“Oh Taehyung, S/N wanted to visit you.” Once again, a grin appeared in his face and he enthusiastically beckoned you sister over. She too smiled and walked forward before presenting her own bag of snacks and games.

“I promised that I’d lend you this game, so here it is.” She whipped out a game case and Taehyung clapped his hands in excitement, cheering.

“Yes! I was waiting for this, thank you so much!”

The next hour was spent making conversation although Na Young didn’t contribute as much as the rest of you. When your sister suddenly stood from her seat, she declared that she was going to buy a drink from the vending machine on the ground floor and left the room. You conversed for a couple more minutes before Na Young claimed that she needed some fresh air and took off.

You took this as your one and only chance to make sense of your thoughts.

“Tae, when did Na Young approach you about her situation?”

He paused the game he was playing and looked up in contemplation before replying seconds later.

“I guess the week before you left for Japan.”

Maybe that wasn’t the best question to ask.

“Well, when you confronted the boys was she there and if she was did she act weird?” It seemed your questions had made him curious since he furrowed his eyebrows in slight confusion.

“Yeah she was there and I’m not really sure but what’s with all these questions? Is something wrong?” You really didn’t want to be the one to tell him but you were the only one who actually saw Na Young the day before with the boys who attacked Taehyung.

“I… I don’t know, it’s just weird. Are you sure Na Young was actually in trouble? I saw her yesterday with the same boys you confronted. There was no way I could mistake them for anyone else.”

Taehyung’s eyebrows dipped even more and he shifted in his bed.

“Wait, what? You mean Na Young lied to me?” Taehyung didn’t sound all too hurt, if anything he sounded shocked that someone had actually approached him and lied straight to his face. He wasn’t the type of person you would willingly approach. He may have a bubbly exterior but many students had heard of his notorious fights and they didn’t tend to end well.

“We shouldn’t jump to conclusions. All I’m saying is you should be cautious because it seems like she knowingly put you here. God knows what for.” Taehyung stared down at his sheets for a few moments before his expression reverted back to its carefree look.

“It doesn’t matter anyway, she’s not important to me.” You sighed in relief at the fact that Taehyung seemed to remain unaffected by what was most likely the truth.

“Where is S/N? She’s been gone quite a while.” It was only when Taehyung mentioned your sister that you realised it had in fact been fifteen minutes since you last saw her. Buying a drink definitely doesn’t take that long.

“Hold on, I’ll be back.” Pushing yourself up, you walked out into the hallway and climbed down the nearby stairs. When you reached the ground floor, you spotted the vending machine your sister had supposedly gone to. She was nowhere to be seen so you decided to search the hospitals garden. As soon as you stepped out, you were grabbed, dragged to the side and pushed done onto your knees.

A glance to the side revealed that it was your sister who had pushed you into hiding. Not wanting to make any noise, you raised an eyebrow at her and she tapped her ear, silently telling you to listen.

“He’s leaving the hospital tomorrow. I don’t want to get involved again! Why didn’t you finish him when you had the chance? I’m not doing that! Well, tell Gun Ho to go fuck himself!” It wasn’t hard to figure out that the voice belonged to Na Young and you weren’t even half surprised at her side of the conversation you just eavesdropped in. You could almost say you saw it coming.

That didn’t stop you from feeling immense anger at her and your sister could practically see that too. However, you knew she wouldn’t stop you from doing what you felt you needed to do. Getting into your feet, you brushed your knees off and stood behind Na Young, waiting for her to finish her phone call. When she finished yelling into her phone, she placed it back into her pocket and spun on her heel, jumping slightly when she came face to face with you.

“Oh, hey-”

“Cut that shit out. I heard your conversation and I saw you yesterday. What the fuck do you think you’re doing.” She didn’t even flinch when you revealed that you knew everything, she just readjusted her bag straps.

“Just doing what I’m told to.” You could have body slammed her at that exact moment. You couldn’t believe she had the audacity to say that to you without the slightest hint of remorse.

“Oh, I guess messing up the lives of kind hearted people is normal for you then? Because Taehyung only had the purest intentions in mind when you came running to him for 'help’ even if he did end up beating the shit out of your little boyfriends.” She rolled her eyes at you and stepped to the side, trying to walk around you. Before she could do so, you blocked her path once again.

“I don’t even want to know why you’re doing this, I just want you to leave Taehyung alone because trust me, it’s not going to end well for you.” She scoffed and crossed her arms, placing her weight on one foot and giving you a quick once over.

“Are you threatening me? Do you know who you’re messing with?” You let a slight smirk cross your lips and Na Young’s eyes narrowed at you.

“I’m not threatening you. I’m looking out for you. It wouldn’t be nice if Taehyung’s friends found out that you caused all of this. They’re very protective of each other, you know?” She held your stare for a few more moments before she let out a deep sigh.

“I’m going. I never wanted to be a part of this in the first place.”  She stood up straight before mumbling a goodbye and walked straight out of the hospital.

“That was kind of cool but you could have made it less cheesy.” Your younger sister stood beside you, watching the doors Na Young had just left through.

“Well I didn’t exactly plan it, did I? But I’m surprised it ended the way it did.”

Your sister switched her gaze to you before placing her hands on her hips, breathing out through her nose.

“If I’m being completely honest, me too.”

You hoped that would be the last time you had to interact with Na Young.


The ABCs: A Riverdale Fanfiction-One

Introduction/AN: Hello everyone! I am so excited to finally be posting part of this story that, if you’ve been following me you’ll know, I’ve been debating about even writing for a few weeks but I’m already loving the way it’s turning out. It’s an AU with a few OCs (including the main female character) but I hope you like it anyway. Kind of a spoiler, kind of not a spoiler it will end up being a Jughead/OC pairing but it takes a while to get there so bear with me this is going to be a journey. 

Also I’m probably not going to do any Riverdale stuff other than this.

Word Count: 1,551

Warnings: None that I can think of?

Story Summary: (Haven’t figured out how to summarize this story yet…)

Chapter Summary: Archie, Betty, and Jughead teach Veronica about the Riverdale ABCs.

Originally posted by nessa007

Chapter One: Pop’s Diner

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Goddamit, Atlus! I just want to be gay with Ryuji. And Mishima. And Yusuke. Maybe Akechi. 100% with Iwai.

Oh yes, Anon!
I miss the good old times where we still had a canon gay romance option…
*stares off into the distance, thinking about the angel Jun Kurosu was*

I’d date them all! <3
Though I have to admit, I am glad happy with the romance options of Persona 5. The only one I don’t like is Makoto so that’s a huge difference compared to Persona 4, where most girls were obnoxious as hell to me.

Okay now this turned longer than I thought but… Bear with me.
Ryuji and Yusuke would probably have a quite basic romance route, I imagine them playing out quite like their usual social link with some slips into the romance world!

Ryuji would probably confess his love after a training session, when both of them are out of breath and sweaty, trying to calm as the sun sets. Ryuji would get silent all of a sudden before he starts breaking the silence with a “Dude, there’s something I’ve been wanting to tell ya.”
He’d first confess that he was gay, waiting for Akira’s reaction and after that he’d confess if the reaction showed understanding.

Yusuke would go normal as well until he makes the request for Akira to be his model more and more, next he’d want to show Akira his artbook, revealing that he had been drawing nothing else but Akira for a quite a while, stating how Akira was always on his mind. “Such grace, such devine beauty… Akira, I fear I can’t think about anything else anymore.”
His confession would be super dramatic.

Mishima there would already be a little harder! You’d need at least level 4 of kindness to ask him out! Yuuki would confess in the park starting off with a “You know, now that I’ve changed, now that I am not the weak self I used to be… I…” he turns silent then and the protag gets the chance to ask further before he continues with “THE PHANTOM THIEVES STOLE MY HEART!” bubbling out of him as his whole face is flushed a deep red and he falls silent again with a gasp. Then the Protag gets the chance to ask him out or turn him down IN A NICE AND UNDERSTANDING WAY. (Don’t want baby boy to get hurt)

NOW AKECHI HERE WOULD HAVE SO MUCH DRAMA POTENTIAL
His romance route would be quite similar to Shinjiro from Persona 3! He’d try to turn you down several times, stating and giving hints that he’s not the one who he seems to be, that he doesn’t deserve such kind of affection. Once you kinda forced you way into dating him, much like the female MC did, Goro would turn silent, giving a somewhat sad/resenting smile, not long after this event the canon returns and plays out like usual giving a bitter end to this romance.
((Though there’d be a way to save Akechi in a New Game+ where you end up finding him hurt in the Metaverse if you decide to take on one of Mishima’s last requests, resulting in a heartbreaking dialogue))

Iwai would be a little harder to get as well, you gotta have maximum Guts and Charm in order to get gun daddy’s approval.
He’d start out like a tease, always turning you down when you engaged into his flirtatious actions. He’d say stuff like “Damn, you’re younger than Kaoru, you shouldn’t be reacting like this.”
At some point he’s break the silence as Akira works in the store starting off with a “Man, you ain’t a easy one, y'know?” as he stratches the back of his head. Akira gets a normal, a flirtatious and an innocent answer possibilitiy, normal and flirtatious will engage into the romance route.
Iwai would continue, “Man… Falling for a brat like you, I’m really pathetic.” And then it’s all up to Akira to charm the older man in order to get him to finally date you.
The last sentence before th scene ends would be “How the hell am I supposed to explain this to Kaoru…”

anonymous asked:

if it was jungkook who got no lines in the song, you would probably be reacting very differently... hoseok getting no lines isn't a big deal to you because he isn't the member you care about, but he actually does matter to other bts fans. not caring for members like hoseok is something that is recurring among people who bias the younger members, particularly jungkook.

To be genuinely honest, I really would not be affected if Jeongguk had little to no lines in a song, but that is just me. This is because I know that BTS make decisions like these for particular reasons that we know nothing about, and also because none of us have a single clue as to what goes on during their song / album production process. If Jeongguk were to not have a single verse in a song (Or a multitude of songs, for that matter) – sure, it would be weird, just like it is in the situation with Hoseok. Though I would be reacting the precise same way that I am now, no matter who the member is, because clearly the boys are satisfied with the decision themselves. I have not said anywhere that Hoseok getting no lines ‘isn’t a big deal to me’ – I just understand that there must have been a reason behind why he did not, as bizarre that it is that such a decision was made for their featuring song on the repackage comeback. I am preferring to view this from a logical, mature perspective rather than twisting the entire ordeal into bitter chaos and a game of blame. 

And also, don’t you even dare try to say that Hoseok is not a member that I care about. I honest to god adore and respect every single one of those boys equally and the only reason that I ‘bias’ Yoongi and Jeongguk is due to how attuned I am to their personalities, and because I enjoy creating personalities for them to write fics about. It has nothing to do with their talent or skill, so do not try to shove words into my mouth like you 1. know what you are talking about, and 2. know me and can read my precise thoughts based on a placid opinion I have shared. I see you trying to be vague by saying ‘not caring for members like Hoseok is something that is recurring among people who bias the younger members, particularly Jungkook’ – but did you know that I literally stanned every single one of the members (Yes! Hobi was my third ‘bias’ if that is so unbelievable to you!) over the past two years before I even ended up at Jeongguk? No. So go and project that ridiculous statement into the sun, thank you.

Anyway, I just realised that I deleted the post saying I am not discussing this topic any further, as I have expressed my opinions towards the situation quite clearly already. So please respect this and do not message me about the whole ordeal anymore as it is just stirring more drama due to people taking what I am saying the wrong way and clearly brushing over my thoughts because I am not a sole Hoseok stan, thus I do not wish to have any more involvement.

Questions part 1

A continuation of a not at all fluffy Darkiplier story. The previous chapters:

I would suggest you read them rather than try to pick up in the middle. 

Originally posted by markfangirl

“Where am I?” I chose the most obvious first question. The cavernous room looked like a fancy monochrome restaurant, but the absence of other tables and other people told me otherwise. It couldn’t be real, not quite. It was far too convenient, and only a few steps from my real kitchen.
“You are in the centre of my attention,” the man in the suit replied with a small smile. He gestured around the space, stylish but empty as it was.

Keep reading

Limerance Chapter 2

Viviane aspires to join the Winter Court’s guard, but Kallias is not favorable to the idea. The guard is a dangerous position to hold and the High Lors heir knows deep within that Viviane would not be suited for it. This leas to Kallias and Viviane having their first fight. 

“One day I am going to join the guard!” Viviane exclaimed with excitement as she swung down from a low-hanging pine branch and landed with ease beside Kallias. A few years had passed since their first fateful encounter in the gardens outside the Winter Court castle.

During that passing of time Viviane and Kallias strengthened their friendship and became known to play or study together. They were inseparable.

“What guard? The High Lord’s Court guard?” Kallias raised a curious brow as he matched Viviane’s stride back toward her home.

Surely that is not what Viviane meant. It took many years of training to join and even more skill that the usual fae

Then there was also the matter of gender. Viviane was a female and more often then not males were the only ones accepted into the forces inside the castle walls. In fact Kallias only recalled a handful of females that had worked their way to the guard over the past centuries.

Yet even if those obstacles were not there for some reason Kallias couldn’t see Viviane holding a position among some of the more ruthless and reserved.

It didn’t suite her lively personality. Viviane should be able to interact with others and bring life to conversations. Not standing among the halls or going to battle against the Winter Court enemies.

Kallias dared not imagine Viviane on the front lines.

Keep reading

Troy Otto x OC One Shot Series Part #3

Hello my lovelies, as promised, here’s part 3!

Chapter 3

Arya didn’t like Troy. In fact, she despised him. His smug attitude and penchant for picking arguments with her pissed her off. It got worse after she had accidentally discovered his aroused state during one of their more heated arguments. Since then, Troy had bumped heads with Arya at every turn. He constantly forced her to interact with the soldiers at the base; have meals with them, drink with them and go on border patrol with them. He said she had to ‘participate’ in the community if she wanted to be a part of it. She had instantly pointed out that she never wanted to be a part of the community and that if he’d just let her go, she’d be on her way back to LA. He hadn’t liked that suggestion much, judging by the slamming of his office door.

It was awkward at first; for both the guys as well as Arya. The guys knew Troy had somewhat of a soft spot for Arya so they didn’t trouble her much. They tended to leave her alone but now that they were all having dinner together, neither one of them knew what to say. Troy’s men looked to him for guidance but their Leader’s eyes were fixated on the pretty girl with a scowl on her face.

Keep reading

The Bodyguard #7

Originally posted by jack777

Word count: 1356 // I know it is too long for a drabble…hope that is okay…

Warnings: Mention of death a little angst.

Author’s note: Sorry for the delay everything got fucking deleted as I was about to finish it days ago -.- Fuck my life! I also struggled a little but I hope it is okay :D

Check out my masterlist ;)

#1   #2   #3   #4  #5  #6

Get your own drabble here :D

Request: 6,12,13 for the drabble game with Jackson Wang? Thank you ♥

Sorry! I forgot! Its the mafia au!! Thank you!

6: “Look at me when I’m fucking talking to you”

12: Falling in love with the enemy

13: “What is a pretty girl like you doing in this place?”

Keep reading

The King’s Favor. Part II

The ceremony was held in the great hall of kings and it had progressed smoothly. The royal family, their many relatives and the elites of Erebor were present to bestow their blessings on the little prince. The halls were decked with the finest tapestries and decorations and hosted large tables bearing enough food and ale to feed all of Erebor for a week. It was a royal celebration and it couldn’t fall short of grandeur.

You had a mildly busy day.

Keep reading

In another life (14/14) - revamped

Hi,

Some of you might have seen this fic already in it’s earlier form. I really wanted to get it out before the finale but by doing that I ended up rushing it and wasn’t really happy with the finished product. Since I posted I kept dreaming up new scenes and ways to add to the plot…. so I did.

The fic is probably 3 times longer than when I first wrote it. It’s been a labour of love for the last few days and I really enjoyed writing this one. I like writing all my fics, (I wouldn’t do it otherwise) but I really enjoyed exploring this world.

Anyway… story under the break or you can read here (it’s fairly long)https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12629339/1/In-another-life

 I hope you like it.

Chapter 1

“You will pay for your betrayal Warlock,” The Queen said, a calm rage emanating from her.

Magnus locked his jaw and stood firm, he may be a sole Warlock in the middle of the Seelie Court, but he would not be intimidated, “You’re hardy one to talk about betrayal…..your majesty,” the undeserving title added as an afterthought with an over the top bow.

“Clearly you’ve been spending too much time with Shadowhunters ….” she said, voice souring on the word, knowing she would hit a nerve.

“This is nothing to do with Alec,” he seethed, knowing full well what she was really getting at.

“Really?” the Queen said, a wicked plan brewing in her mind. “Well then, if you truly don’t need him in your life anymore, you won’t mind if keep him ….occupied.”

Don’t touch him,” Magnus warned, eyes shifting, fully prepared to take on the whole room if he had to.

“Oh, don’t worry dear boy,” she smiled, reminding Magnus of her superior age…and power, “I won’t touch a hair on his pretty little head.”

Magnus covered his eyes with his arm as a flash of blinding white light filled the room. He had to blink several times to re-adjust to the almost pitch dark of the dive bar he now stood in.

“What can I get you?” a familiar voice said from across the bar.

Looking up he was greeted by a smile he hadn’t earned in quite some time, “Drink….do you want one?” Magnus registered that the words were being spoken slower this time, clearly not the first time the question had been asked.

“Alexander?” He questioned, “what’s going on here?” Magnus rested his hands on the bar and sat down slowly.

“Like, what….today…. or in general?” Alec smiled, mind pre-occupied and not catching the stranger’s drift. Magnus watched in confusion as Alec wiped the bar and hung the wash cloth over his arm.

His rune free arm Magnus noted. What the hell had the Queen done? Why doesn’t he know me?

“So, am I getting you a drink or what?” Alec said, both hands resting on the bar as he stood in front of Magnus, “or have you maybe had enough?….. Don’t take this wrong but you seem a little out of it.”

“Ugh, ….yes…..I think perhaps it is time for me leave,” Magnus agreed, wanting to get to the bottom of what was going on but also not wanting to leave Alec there when something was so clearly wrong.

“Ok, well, can I call you a cab?” Alec asked,

“No…. thank you. I can manage,” Magnus replied absent-mindedly, he had a feeling that “a portal is faster.” probably wouldn’t help this scenario.

“Ok, well…. take it easy,” Alec said as he turned away, “oh hey wait,” he paused fixing Magnus a look which had him hoping that the effects of the Seelie Queen’s little game had worn off. Alec’s next words making his heart sink.

“How did you know my name?”

“Just a lucky guess… I suppose,” Magnus smiled sadly,

“Very specific lucky guess,” Alec said, not buying it. Hadn’t he told people he didn’t need anyone setting him up on blind dates anymore! Not that he minded if the man in front of him was the result. There was a strange familiarity that Alec couldn’t place…. must have been in the bar before he assumed.

“Anyway, no need to be so formal next time…” he stepped out from behind the bar with a beaming smile and extended his hand. “I’m Alec.”

Magnus took Alec’s hand, “Magnus.” he smiled back. He conjured up the memory of the first time they had introduced themselves, trying to push it through to Alec’s mind but he was met with an unrelenting resistance.

“Ok, well,” Alec stepped back, shaking his head slightly, feeling strange all of a sudden, “don’t be a stranger.”

Magnus pushed the door open, taking one last look, he whispered, “I’ll try, Alexander, I’ll try….”

Chapter 2

“Oh… Jace…Isabelle, please tell me you’re still you?” Magnus exclaimed as he rushed towards them through the Institute.

“We might all be mindless operatives of the Clave Magnus but we’re not completely interchangeable just yet,” Jace replied, bitter on Alec’s behalf.

Magnus raised an eyebrow but swallowed down his reply. He deserved that and besides, there were more important matters at play.

“Alec’s not here Magnus,” Izzy explained kindly, kicking Magnus when he was down wasn’t going to help anyone and he was clearly upset by something, “I haven’t seem him all day actually, which is kind of odd.”

“You have no idea,” Magnus said, eyes betraying his calm exterior “we need to talk,”

X X X

“So, let me get this straight, you piss of the Seelie Queen and my brother pays the price…nice Magnus, real nice.”

“Jace…” Izzy warned, as Magnus uncharacteristically backed down, this was taking it’s toll on the Warlock. Jace caught Izzy’s eyes and raised his hands in a “I surrender” gesture,

“So ….he has no idea who you are? Who any of us are?” Clary asked,

“Well, I didn’t really stop to ask his life story…” Magnus retorted, his snarkiness rearing it’s head in his frustration.

Throwing her a small smile in apology he added, “I don’t know…all I know is that he didn’t know me. Now I don’t know if it’s just me, as some sort of punishment, or if the Queen took everything. His runes were gone so it’s likely that he doesn’t know anything about our world…but as I couldn’t very well ask without him thinking I was a crazy person I ……”

“No, you did the right thing, coming here.” Izzy consoled, putting a hand on his shoulder, “we’ll figure this out.”

“What do we tell the Clave?” Jace asked, watching Magnus’ expression sour, “Look, I don’t want to involve them in this anymore than you do Magnus but the Head of the Institute taking a sabbatical to tend bar isn’t exactly something we can hide forever… People are already asking where he is”

“Jace is right,” Clary agreed, “we can only cover for so long.”

“Well, let’s assess the damage first,” Izzy mused, “tonight… we’ll all head to this bar. See who he recognises and who he doesn’t. Figure it out from there…”

“I’ll reach out to some friends of mine, see if they can offer any assistance,” Magnus said standing to leave.

“I don’t know about that,” Jace said, “Alec isn’t himself right now, if word gets out that he’s out there like this…he can’t protect himself …. I don’t want him to get hurt Magnus.”

“Then that makes two of us,” Magnus answered, calling back on an old conversation they’d shared, “I’ll only speak to people I trust. I know that we’re still at war, but there is nothing more important to me than his safety…I assure you.”

Magnus paused to take a breath as he stood in the corridor, his own words repeating in his mind. He sighed as realisation finally dawned on him… he would never be able to truly walk away from Alec, no matter what he told himself.

This is the kind of conflict he had so desperately wanted to avoid but here he was again, torn between his people and the man he loved… no matter the distance he put between them, he would always be pulled back in.

Chapter 3

“Hey, it’s Magnus right?” Alec said nonchalantly, as if he hadn’t memorised everything about Magnus before he’d left that afternoon, “and you bought some friends,” he added, hoping his disappointment wasn’t obvious.

‘Get over yourself Alec’ he told himself, ‘he’s not here for you.’

“Don’t they ever let you go home?” Magnus joked, phishing for information, taken aback again at the sight of Alec before him. Unaware of the predicament he found himself in, Alec was so much lighter, no duties resting heavily on his shoulders.

“I live upstairs,” Alec said before he could catch himself. Since when he did share that kind of information with someone he barely even knew. “What can I get you guys,” he asked, quickly recovering, feeling uneasy under the watchful gaze of Magnus’ friends.

'Maybe they’ve come to check if you’re date worthy,’ he thought to himself, 'maybe not’… his mind changed as he caught the blond’s glare.

“Well, I guess that answers that question,” Jace said to the group, watching as his brother worked in front of him, with no recollection at all.

Three rounds and 21 questions later and Alec had ended up telling them where he grew up, who his favourite high school teacher was and rather bizarrely that he liked to sleep on the right side of the bed…how they got that kind of information when they were the ones drinking not him he didn’t know.

“Well, the Queen did a good job on the back-story,” Clary whispered just out of Alec’s earshot,

“He has no idea who we are,” Izzy said sadly, “what are we going to do?”

“I got a call from Catarina just before we arrived,” Magnus leaned in, “this type of enchantment is rare and requires an inordinate amount of magic, but for someone of the Queen’s power, it’s just another everyday spell. As much magic as I have, I can’t match that.”

He cast a forlorn look in Alec’s direction, painting on a fake smile as Alec caught his eye, holding it a little longer than was really necessary.

“You’re saying there’s nothing we can do?” Jace asked, “we just have to hope the Queen has a personality transplant and brings him back?”

“Well there is…no…it’s not possible,” Magnus started to explain but stopped himself, no point stirring up false hope.

“What?” the three Shadowhunters asked eagerly,

“Well, there is one small, and I mean small chance that he …..might break the enchantment on his own… but with a fabrication like this, by someone so powerful, it’s unlikely, which is why I hesitated to mention it. For Alexander to remember on his own, his connection to his old life would have to be more powerful than the one he’s living in now, he would have to want to remember…”

“How he is supposed to want to remember something he doesn’t know exists?” Clary asked, almost tripping over the complexity,

“And there in lies the problem,” Magnus sighed. Alec’s new life at first glance was far superior to the one he had left behind, enticing him back home, to a life that constantly took from him the only things he wanted would be easier said than done.

Chapter 4

Magnus quickly became a regular in the bar, keeping a not so subtle eye on the Shadowhunter from a table that had quickly become his second home.

“Why don’t you just ask him out?” Alec’s friend, that Magnus vaguely recalled as Emma, said, nudging Alec in the shoulder. Alec looked up and caught Magnus’ eye before dropping it embarrassed. Alec didn’t know that Magnus was using his magic to eavesdrop, but he felt the blush rising in his face all the same.

“Yeah right Em,” Alec breathed low, “is there room for two in this parallel universe you’ve created.”

Magnus almost scoffed at the irony of Alec’s question but schooled his face to behave as he nursed his cocktail.

“Come on Alec, look at him. Do you really think that someone that looks as good as him, not to mention drinks cocktails at noon, comes to this crappy dive because he likes the ambience…” her eyes casting a disparaging look around at the dilapidated décor.

“Who knows why he comes here?” Alec said, busying himself behind the bar, “but I’m pretty sure it’s safe to say that the Magnus Bane’s of this world are way out of my league.”

Magnus knocked his glass over as a bolt of angry energy released itself unaided from his hand. Did Alec really think that? Had he always thought that? Had Magnus walking away from him that day realised a fear that Alec had never spoken aloud.

“Got you another,” Alec smiled as he placed Magnus’ signature cocktail on the table, “on the house,” he added waving off the hand that was heading to Magnus’ pocket.

“Are you ok?” Magnus asked, gesturing for Alec to sit,

“I’m not really supposed to,” Alec refused politely, “Ah screw it,” he said taking the seat opposite from him, feeling a burning need to break the rules. The bar was practically empty, what harm would it do.

“You don’t seem yourself today,” Magnus continued,

“Oh yeah,” Alec teased, relaxing in his seat, “you know me that well huh?”

Magnus opened his mouth to speak, so many answers on his tongue but none he could say.

“I’m fine,” Alec said breaking the tension, “just got a few things on my mind… I told you I live upstairs right… well the guy that owns this place is selling up, so I got to find a new job, apartment, hasn’t been the best week, but I’ll manage…”

“Oh Alexander, I’m sorry…” Magnus drew his hand back at the last second, realising that he had been about to reach out.

Alec cocked an eyebrow at the use of his full name again. He usually hated it but from Magnus, somehow it just felt right. Magnus caught the look on Alec’s face and misread it, 'ok, maybe dial back on the Alexander,’ he thought to himself. They wanted to trigger Alec’s memory but they couldn’t rush things.

“Well, as it happens there’s actually a vacant apartment in my building” ’or there will be once I work some magic’… “what?” Magnus stopped as Alec just leaned back and laughed in response to the offer.

“Sorry,” he smiled, “I just ….. I’m flattered that you think I could afford to live in your apartment building… thanks really but um, I think I should set my sights a little lower.”

An intense burning ignited in Magnus’ chest as he listened to Alec talk about himself that way again. He hated it.

“You should never settle for anything less than you deserve, Alec” he said, his words holding a deeper meaning. “and as it happens, I own the building, so I control the rent and for you… I could ….”

“Magnus… I appreciate it really,” Alec said standing, “but you barely even know me so…”

Magnus took Alec gently by the wrist to stop him from walking away, a spark of something coursing through them both on contact. A faint glimmer of recognition entering Alec’s eyes. Alec drew his hand away uncomfortable, this all felt so strange, but also so right.

“I should get back to work.” he said gesturing to the bar and leaving without a reply.

X X X

Magnus didn’t return to the bar for a few days, Warlock business and a fear that Alec might not want to see him keeping him away. Instead he sent some of his most trusted Warlocks to keep an eye on Alec and report back.

Magnus was surprised to see his caller ID light up with the name Alexander, he didn’t remember giving Alec his number, not in this incarnation anyway. Was this a sign?

“Hello Alec.” he said as he answered the call,

“How did you know it was me”?

“Caller ID is a marvel…”

“You don’t have my number,” Alec stated, “and… I don’t have yours but somehow it was in my phone…”

“My friend’s must have added it when you weren’t looking” Magnus covered badly, brushing over how he had Alec’s number “they do like to meddle. Is that what you called for, to check I wasn’t stalking you?”

“Um…no actually, I was hoping that maybe that offer for the apartment might still be open, I know I was ungrateful before but…”

“No explanation needed,” Magnus said, silently thanking every deity he knew, “I’ll send you the address. Meet me there at 1?”

“Yeah, great thanks. Bye Magnus,”

“Bye, Alec,” Magnus placed his phone on the bookshelf and clapped his hands together to ignite his magic. “Right, one apartment coming up…”

Chapter 5

“Oh crap, sorry,” Alec exclaimed reaching out instinctively to take the elbow of whoever he had run into, steadying them both as the boxes he’d piled precariously in front of his face fell to the floor.

Looking up he came face to face with Magnus’ eyes, the sight of them so close to him turning his stomach upside down. Alec flushed and pulled his arm back embarrassed, Magnus must be able to tell what he did to him. Casting his eyes down he dropped to one knee to gather his things, he didn’t have much to bring over from his old apartment so he’d figured he’d do it one trip, he was regretting that now at the mess he’d made.

“You like to read?” Magnus asked as he helped refill the boxes with Alec’s books.

“When I have time… which I suppose I’ll have more of now,” he added wistfully, “no job yet,” he explained as Magnus gave him a look, “but don’t worry, I can still make the rent.”

Magnus smiled to himself, if the Seelie Queen had intended to push them apart with her deception her plan was failing, as every day it bought a new opportunity for Magnus to ingratiate himself into Alec’s life. He had relented in calling him Alexander after their last encounter, it only ever earned him a confused look and he found it easier that way to separate this new version of Alec from the one he knew and loved.

“Well, it just so happens that I’m in need of a new bartender at Pandemonium,” Magnus smiled in an elegant stretch of the truth. He picked up one of Alec’s boxes and they walked to the elevator in sync.

“Are you messing with me now?” Alec laughed in disbelief,

“I would never,” Magnus said placing a hand to his heart in mock horror,

“Really?” Alec asked as they exited the elevator and stopped at his door, “I’m a stranger, you’ve already given me a place to live practically rent free and now you’re offering me a job too? Are there hidden cameras in here?” he joked as he pushed open his door.

Magnus’ faltered a bit as Alec highlighted that he was a stranger, that feeling was never lost on Magnus but hearing it said out loud was a different matter. He wanted so much to see Alexander when he looked into his eyes, but a stranger just looked back at him instead.

Magnus knocked the feeling back and laughed as Alec placed his box down just inside the door, “You need to learn to accept good things when they happen Alec,” Magnus smiled placing down his box too, hoping the advice would penetrate the magic closing Alec off from him and reach it’s intended target.

“Is that just a polite way to say don’t be so uptight?” Alec laughed, hands fumbling in his pockets.

“I would hardly call you that,” Magnus laughed, genuine this time. Uptight was the last thing this version of Alec was, he had scarcely seen him so loose and carefree before. The sight of it actually made his heart ache a little.

“Yeah, my brother would disagree with you,” Alec joked, grabbing a glass of water and holding a second glass out to Magnus in offering.

“To us” Magnus said, clinking Alec’s glass…“Your brother”? Magnus continued when Alec showed no sign of understanding.

“No,” Alec stalled confused, “I uh… I don’t have a brother… I don’t know why I said that,” he muttered more to himself than to Magnus. “Oh… I uh… think you dropped this downstairs,” he said holding out a small fabric object to Magnus. Deflection was one of his go to tactics when he didn’t want to talk about something.

The look of unrestrained relief on Magnus’ face as he passed the item over made Alec’s heart leap. Clearly this was something precious, whatever it was.

“Thank you Alexander,” Alec heard, half remembered, as Magnus’ fingers grazed his, “Thank you,” Magnus repeated, he could see that Alec had spaced out for a second and could only hope that it meant what he thought it did. “I’d be devastated if I lost this.”

“Luck and protection,” Alec muttered, “that’s what it’s for …..right?” He had no idea how he knew that but somehow he did.

Magnus smiled in acknowledgement unable to speak for the emotion that was coursing through him. Alec was remembering… remembering him.

“So… about the job,” Magnus asked, changing tack and leaving it open for Alec to respond,

“You’re serious?”

“Rarely,” Magnus smirked with a wink, “but in this instance, yes.”

“Well, yeah… I’d be crazy to turn you down… Thanks again… I seriously owe you.” Alec said, voice brimming with gratitude. He didn’t know what he done to be lucky enough to have Magnus fall into his life, but he wasn’t complaining.

“Well then, Welcome to the Pandemonium family Mr. Lightwood,” Magnus said, his hand outstretched in mock formality.

“It’s an honour Mr. Bane,” Alec joked back, freezing as his hand closed in Magnus’ and the room started to change around him.

He was in a place that was strange yet familiar at the same time, The Downworld Council, his brain informed him, not that he knew what that meant. Magnus stood in front of him, hand in hand with him still. Alec opened his mouth to ask a question but the vision faded as quickly as it had emerged.

Magnus caught the change in Alec’s demeanour but knew better than to acknowledge it. He needed to let the memories come back naturally, forcing them could overwhelm Alec’s mind and he could lose him in a completely different and irreversible way.

“You can start tomorrow,” Magnus said withdrawing his hand and walking to Alec’s door. He stopped in the hall for a second. Waving his hand he turned the wall to glass for the briefest of moments to take one last look. Alwc was so at ease as he milled around his loft unpacking, lighter and at peace. Magnus wanted Alexander back so badly but he also wished that in some small way that this part of Alec could stay as well. The best of both world’s as the saying went… but he knew that for so many reason, that could never happen

Chapter 6

Alec had moved into Magnus’ building about a week ago, not that he could really call it moving when all he had to his name was those few boxes of books and a duffel bag of dark t-shirts and some cargo pants to his name. Most of the shirts were green for some reason that Alec didn’t fully comprehend.

“Yeah I’m coming, one sec.” he called to the unknown visitor knocking on his door, pulling on a pair of pants and trying not to fall on his way to the door. “Magnus, hey, sorry, was just getting out of the shower…Magnus?” he repeated when Magnus didn’t respond.

Snapping himself back to reality Magnus stepped into the apartment which was an almost carbon copy of his own. He’d hoped the familiarity would help Alec find his way back to them…back to him.

Rummaging through his bag to find a clean shirt Alec called over his shoulder, “You uh, need something?” He had never been shy about showing his body before, he knew objectively that he was attractive, but felt a strange scrutiny coming from Magnus’ gaze.

As grateful as he was to see Alec shirtless again, it was the lack of runes that had him captivated this time more than his physique. “Just came to see how you were settling in,” Magnus said, averting his gaze when he knew he’d been caught, “Is everything ok?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Alec said pulling the shirt over his head, “the apartment is great. I can’t thank you enough Magnus, really… you saved my life. I owe you big time.”

'You owe me nothing" Magnus wanted to say but knew he couldn’t. Alec’s memory loss aside, that was a conversation that neither of them were in a position to have. When they had parted last Magnus had been closing Alec out, figuratively and literally, he winced as he remembered closing the door in Alec’s face. It had been for the best …..

“Are you uh, are you sure I can’t pay you more for this place, or I don’t know, lend a hand with maintenance or something. I mean this is more than I imagined when you said you had an empty apartment…and the job too…” Alec stammered, overcome by a nervous energy.

“All I need is for you to enjoy the space, it was going to waste before, and knowing that it’s being used by someone that needs it is enough for me.” …Ok, so none of that was strictly true but it was close enough.

“Well, thanks…again. I’d uh, offer you a drink but I’m off the clock” Alec joked.

“That’s fine, I really only came to see how you were settling in.” Magnus smiled, “and to let you know that if you ever need anything. I’m just upstairs…for anything.”

There was a heavier messaged laced within those words and Alec could feel it, he just didn’t know how to process it. Ever since he’d seen Magnus that first day in the bar, his whole world had been slightly off kilter. Nothing felt right but then again, everything felt right…he couldn’t explain it.

“I’ll see myself out,” Magnus smiled backing away, “just remember…”

“You’re upstairs,”

'Believe me, I don’t need anything else to remind me about but you being right upstairs.’ he thought. He’d hardly slept since he’d moved in, thoughts of what Magnus might be doing just above him driving him crazy. He was drawn to him unlike anyone he had ever known before.

The door closed behind Magnus and Alec stepped out onto the balcony for some much needed fresh air. He had the feeling that another sleepless night was on the cards, but what would it be this time? Disjointed visions of memories he couldn’t possibly have or fantasies of the man with the beautiful eyes that he couldn’t get out of his mind.

X X X

Magnus peppered soft kisses up Alec’s chest, hands resting on either side of Alec’s body as he stopped to place kisses to his neck. Alec’s hands tangled into Magnus’ hair as he tipped his head back, a soft moan escaping his lips as Magnus rocked his hips against his own…

Ok’ ….Alec work up with a start… It was going to be one of those nights.

Of the choices he had, waking up to fantasies…memories?…no fantasies of Magnus all over him was better than screaming himself awake with some kind of creature trying to rip him to pieces but the lack of sleep was taking it’s toll.

Alec pulled himself away from his sweat soaked sheets and headed for the kitchen. Downing his glass of water he ran a tired hand through his hair and lay back in his bed, stuck half way between awake and asleep. He felt the ghost of someone’s presence at his side as his eyes dropped closed…

You’re not the only one that’s vulnerable…”

When things get crazy, don’t push me away…”

I told you things I’ve never told anyone…”

I can’t have both…”

“I love you too,” Alec whispered to himself as he imagined Magnus saying the words, sleep taking him soon after.

Chapter 7

“Alec? Are you home?” Magnus called, one foot inside Alec’s open front door. If anyone asked he would strongly deny that his heart had lurched inelegantly to the floor at the sight of the usually saftey conscious Alec’s door left ajar.

“Oh hey,” Alec called, poking his head around the balcony corner where he had been all along just out of sight. Magnus let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding and hoped that it had gone unnoticed. “Oh shit… Did I leave the door open?” Alec asked realising what he must have done, “Sorry, I had my hands full and just kicked it closed. I’ll be more careful.”

“No need to apologise,” Magnus answered getting his emotions under control, still hovering in the doorway. Yes he owned the place but this was Alec’s space and he wouldn’t dream of intruding uninvited.

“God… um, come in… sorry… come in,” Alec stammered, flustered as he realised his bad manners.

Magnus tensed slightly, he was sick of hearing Alec apologise, no matter how lightheartedly. He was in this situation because of a mistake Magnus had made. Magnus was the one that needed to apologise this time, and for so much than their current predicament.

Magnus raised an eyebrow at Alec’s still sparse loft, for some reason Alec still didn’t have any furniture despite having been there a few weeks. They’d seen each other in the halls a few “accidental” times but baring that Magnus had tried to keep a restrained distance so as not to overwhelm Alec’s now mundane brain with too much at once.

“Not planning on staying?” Magnus half-joked, scared of the answer but masking it with a suave smile.

“Yeah of course I am?” Alec replied, “Oh right um… furniture…I bought a bed, the rest will have to wait a while.”

Alec instantly regretted saying the word bed in Magnus’ presence as he felt a flush rising in his cheeks. It wasn’t his fault alright, Magnus looked especially hot today. He’d opted for a slightly toned down casual look, a dark red henley showing off the barest slivers of his chest, which was adorned with a multitude of different necklaces. His black slacks hugging his hips just right, a pair of suspenders hanging casually from his waist. Alec marvelled at how Magnus made it look effortless and knew that this particular outfit would be making an appearance on dream Alec’s bedroom floor that night.

Clearing his throat as casually as he could Alec stepped out onto the balcony, he needed some air. Magnus joined him and they enjoyed the view in silence for a few moments.

“You know I have furniture I could lend you if you want.” Magnus offered,

“You’ve done more than enough,” Alec smiled gratefully, “besides I have this outdoor set my old neighbour gave me… she always used to joke that I used to spend more time outside than in.”

“Really?” Magnus was intrigued, he’d never really thought of Alec as an out-doorsy kind before.

“Yeah, I guess I like the freedom of it… if that makes any kind of sense.”

Magnus just smiled in response as he took in the relaxed slope of Alec’s shoulders as he talked about it. “Well there’s more space up on the roof…”

“The roof?” Alec said, voice distant and thoughtful as he pictured it in a minute detail that by rights he had no business knowing. “I bet that’s nice.”

“It is,” Magnus agreed, “You’re welcome to use it… whenever you want.” Alec clearly wasn’t getting his vague offerings so it was time to be more explicit… to spell it out to him, as it were.

“No I couldn’t,” Alec declined politely, “that’s your space, I don’t want to intrude…”

“I wouldn’t have offered it was an intrusion Alexander,” Magnus’ voice softened as the name slipped out against his will.

“Ok sure… I’ll check it out,” Alec said, not really sure that he actually would. The only access to the roof was through Magnus’ place and he didn’t want to disturb him every time he needed a breather. He had his own balcony after all, how much more space did he really need… although the thought of sharing a space that he knew would be so uniquely Magnus piqued his interest more than he would admit.

Magnus sensed Alec’s unrest and realised instinctively what was on his mind. Alec didn’t want to be a burden… this version of Alec didn’t know that nothing would ever be too much for Magnus to do where he was concerned. Magnus surveyed Alec’s profile carefully and wondered, had Alexander known that either? Had he done enough to prove that to him before the whole world went to hell?

Magnus clenched his jaw and held back a sigh as a bitter thought filled his mind. Even if Alexander had ever known that, Magnus had almost certainly ripped that feeling away when he’d left him in an Institute hallway, tears streaming from his eyes.

“There’s access to the roof from your fire escape,” Magnus said, chasing that thought away with a burst of magic behind his back that Alec’s turned face couldn’t see. “ So… even if I’m not home, just go on up whenever you want.”

Alec looked over toward the fire escape with a puzzled brow, “Huh, how did I miss that?” he laughed to himself before approaching the ladder.

“Go ahead,” Magnus encouraged as Alec’s hand stalled on the rung asking permission. The light catching Alec’s face as he smiled ripped Magnus to the core. God he missed waking up to that smile.

He followed Alec up the ladder almost tripping over him, Alec had stopped just short of the ledge and was taking everything in.

“Everything ok?” Magnus asked, voice steeped with hope at the thought that some small memory might have returned.

“Uh yeah… just got a serious case of de ja vu,” Alec said running a hand through his hair, “It’s been happening a lot lately.”

“Oh… really?” Magnus feigned ignorance as he busied himself with anything but looking at Alec. He couldn’t hide the disappointment in his face and Alec didn’t need to see that.

“It’s a great view from here,” Alec deflected,

“Yes it is,” Flirtation dripped from every word like honey as Magnus fought to change his own mood.

Alec flushed knowing that Magnus wasn’t talking about the city below. He looked Magnus in the eye, emboldened by the compliment, a heady wanting in his eyes meeting Magnus’ own. Magnus was shocked by the reciprocation his seemingly harmless comment had stirred. He had steered the on to dangerous ground. Alec wasn’t himself, he didn’t understand why this couldn’t happen…not like this.

Magnus had no right to want what he wanted, he had to be the one to put a stop to this before it started, before they ended up in a bigger mess than they already were.

“Stay as long as you want,” he rushed out in one breath as he retreated, heart pounding in his ears.

Alec deflated instantly at the rejection, he’d really thought for a minute that maybe Magnus felt something for him too.

'You have no clue what I feel’

'And even if I did feel something for you, you want me to give up my life for you?’

“What the hell is wrong with me?” Alec braced himself against the wall as the visions passed. This was happening more and more and had him questioning his own sanity. He could only blame it on the lack of sleep for so long.

Chapter 8

“So how are you holding up?” Izzy asked as he she joined Magnus in Alec’s office. They were still at war and every time Magnus came in for the Downworld Council meetings, now led by Jace, he made a stop to Alec’s now unused office before he left. He was sitting at Alec’s desk, stroking his hand against the smooth surface when she found him.

“Isabelle,” he smiled, but without it reaching his eyes, “I’m fine, thank you,”

“You know, I don’t think either you or my brother actually know what that word means.” She perched on the edge of the desk, Magnus’ shoulders falling as he let down the facade.

“It’s like I’m losing him all over again,”

Izzy leant forward and took Magnus’ hand, “Magnus I love you and I don’t mean to be blunt but you hardly lost him. He didn’t go anywhere, he was here every day putting on the same brave face you are…waiting for you to love him again.”

Magnus recoiled at the thought, breath catching in his throat, “I never stopped loving him Isabelle…never.”

“I know,” she comforted, “and I’m not trying to blame you for any of that, this stupid war is a shitty situation for everyone. ….You both love each other, why not try to work things out… when he’s back to his old self I mean.”

Magnus appreciated her certainty that Alec would return to them the way he was before, sadly, he didn’t match that enthusiasm. There had been fleeting moments of recognition but largely, Alec remained the ghost of his former self and it broke Magnus’ soul every time he saw it, knowing it was his fault.

“One thing at a time,” Magnus stood from the table to make his exit and looked back at her fondly. He valued her friendship in these moments more than he could say.

“Don’t blame yourself for this,” she said seeing through the finely crafted veneer he showed to the world, “Alec wouldn’t want that.”

“This is my fault Isabelle, who else should bare the blame but me?”

“The Seelie Queen for starters…” Izzy scorned, “She did this, not you.”

“She only did it because I made the mistake of trusting her…she’s using Alec to punish me …. I can’t allow that to happen again.” Magnus justified,

“Don’t do that either,” Izzy warned, elaborating at Magnus’ questioning face, “use what’s happening here to distance yourself from Alec further. He’s not a child, he doesn’t need you to “push him away for his own protection” or whatever it is you think you’re doing.“

Magnus wallowed in the words momentarily, Izzy was right of course. Alec was the Head of the New York Institute for goodness sake, he could make his own choices.

"I’ll take the advice on board,” Magnus said formally, armour back in place as he left the room with a courteous smile.

“By the angel,” she said head in hands, “they’ll be the end of me.”

Chapter 9

“Here again?,” Magnus had returned from the Downworld Council and retreated straight to the roof knowing that he would probably find Alec there.

“I can go,” Alec said quickly. He knew he’d overstay his welcome eventually.

“You don’t have to take everything I say as a reproach you know,” Magnus replied, not schooling his tone fast enough. The residual guilt from his conversation with Izzy coming out terse and cold. “You’re always apologising,” he continued, warming his tone in an apology of his own.

“Yeah well maybe I have a lot to apologise for…” Magnus froze, in that moment he could have sworn he was talking to Alexander again. He knew the pain in that voice, the pain he had put there.

'I’m not good at apologies,’

'I should have told you about the Soul Sword’

'You never have to prove yourself to me’

Alec clutched his head, overpowered by an onslaught of fresh apparitions. They had become increasingly frequent and he couldn’t take this anymore, he was losing his mind.

“Alec, what’s wrong?” Magnus said rushing to his side, holding him by the shoulders to steady him.

“I think there’s something wrong with me,” Alec whispered brokenly. Magnus shuddered at the frailty in Alec’s scared voice.

'There’s nothing wrong with you,’ Alec clenched his eyes shut as Magnus’ words reached his ears without having been spoken.

“It’s ok Alexander,” Magnus soothed, rubbing Alec’s back and pulling him into a hug before lowering them both on to the day bed.

They sat in silence, Alec’s head on Magnus’ shoulders. Magnus didn’t need to ask for an explanation and Alec was too exhausted to wonder why Magnus wasn’t more curious. Somewhere along the way they fell asleep, Alec curled into Magnus’ side, wrapped inside his arms where the world couldn’t reach him anymore. Their hands entwined and to an outside observer the scene was one of a happy couple, relishing each other’s warmth but the truth was a much colder reality.

Alec stirred first as the rising sun glinted off the ledge, glancing his eyes briefly. He extricated himself carefully from Magnus’ arms, thankful that he didn’t wake him. Alec could trudge back to his place in unobserved embarrassment. What must Magnus think of him?

X X X

Shaking the stiffness from his shoulders Alec ran the shower, pausing to look at his own reflection as the water warmed. He blinked and rubbed his eyes as someone he didn’t recognise looked back at him. The face was the same but the look was stern, a thick black tattoo reaching from the collar of the stranger’s shirt resting just under his jawline.

“Emotions are nothing but a distraction” the mirage told him firmly,

Alec gaped at the sight before him as it faded away to reveal himself underneath, eyes haggered and weary. It was in that moment that he knew he couldn’t do this anymore. The dreams he could explain, he was infatuated with Magnus, it didn’t take a genuis to work that one out… but the constant feeling of de ja vu, the fragments of someone else’s life, that wasn’t normal and he couldn’t brush that under the carpet anymore.

He needed to see someone about this before he was too far gone to separate reality from fantasy.

Chapter 10

Alec’s hand shook as he put pen to paper. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d written a letter by hand, if he ever had.

Jesus Christ, what are you 12? It’s not a love note, just get on with it’

Alec took comfort in the fact that the internal voice chiding was Actually supposed to be there this time but he still wanted to tell it to go to hell all the same.

He’d called in sick to work and holed himself up in the loft since the 'incident’. Magnus had knocked his door a couple of times but seemingly had given up when his attempts were ignored. In reality, Magnus had cast the occasional magical eye down through the floor. Not long enough to actually call it spying but enough to reassure himself that Alec was safe and just needed space.

Alec had decided on a letter because he knew the second he saw Magnus he’d turn into a rambling idiot. He’d embarrassed himself already, the letter seemed like a safer option. Taking a deep breath he let the words flow from his mind and reach the paper in his bold, yet careful, handwriting.

X X X

Magnus heard the soft patter of bare feet at his door and waited for a knock. Centuries of life hadn’t taught him patience so far, but he was trying. Sinking slightly when the sound didn’t come, he peered at the letter on his floor in curiosity.

He held it in his hands with a loving reverence , soaking in the last few specks of Alec’s aura that clung to the paper. Running a finger beneath the seal he took a deep breath and braced himself.

Magnus,

I wanted to say thank you for staying with me the other night. I can’t explain what happened or why, but I’m working on figuring it out.

I know we don’t really know each other all that well but I trust you and I’m grateful to you for looking out for me the way you have. It means a lot.

You might not see me around for a while, I need to get my head together and I just wanted you to know that it’s not personal and I’ll see you around when I’m in a better place.

Thanks again,

Alec

Magnus stroked his fingers over the words before fixing himself a drink. He was both pleased and terrified by the content of the letter.

Alec was struggling with his reality that much was for sure. The thought that he might be coming back to them almost made Magnus’ heart burst with joy, but knowing the torment it must be causing Alec deflated him just as fast.

Letting the liquor dampen his senses, Magnus resolved to put on a face brave enough to confront this dilemma …in the morning.

Chapter 11

Alec had been in therapy for a few weeks when he next heard from Magnus, he was no closer to understanding where his delusions were coming from, but he was able to cope with them a little better when they did.

He smiled as he peeled the vibrant envelope off the outside of his door, he’d just finished a shift at the club, Magnus must have put it there knowing it would be the first thing to greet him when he got home that morning.

Sitting on his new couch he read:

Alexander,

You are cordially invited to brunch on the roof terrace tomorrow.

Yours, Magnus

Alec smiled at Magnus’ iconic flare for the dramatic before an intense feeling of guilt turned his stomach.

I’m just asking for a strand of hair, let’s not be over-dramatic.’

'Well I wouldn’t want to be over-dramatic… Get out’

"1, 2, 3…"Alec counted to 10 and breathed deeply as he let the feeling pass. Stretching out on the cool leather he tried to analyse what this fiction could mean. It was his therapist’s advice. Alec had never been one for an over-active imagination and his doctor had reasoned that these illusions must be some kind of coping mechanism . A way of processing elements of Alec’s physical life that he was struggling to deal with.

Alec had to admit that he didn’t really buy that explanation, all his visions centred on Magnus and he certainly had no problem understanding why that might be. Sure, he’d been repressed about being gay at first but he’d gotten over that a long time ago so it just didn’t make sense. Why would he even want a strand of Magnus’ hair anyway…

Closing his eyes he decided to rest for a minute before he tried to figure this one out.

X X X

Alec was woken by a gentle but insistent knocking. It wasn’t Magnus’ and he didn’t really know anyone else in the neighbourhood so needless to say he was intrigued.

"Ugh hi?” he rubbed his eyes sleepily so he could focus on the woman at his door. He recognised her from that first time Magnus had bought his friends to the bar but her name escaped him.

“Hey,” she said cheerfully, “Magnus just wanted to check if you got his invitation?”

Izzy chose to keep back the part where Magnus was currently pacing a hole in the roof. Alec was late to brunch, he wouldn’t admit that he was scared he’d been stood up but she could read him like a book.

“Brunch… wait that’s today?…”

'Shit, how long was I asleep?’ Alec asked himself, he hadn’t had a full nights sleep in weeks, let alone a full day and night in a row. Typical it would happen when he needed to be somewhere.

“Yeah I did…uh… crap I guess I overslept… just give me half an hour to freshen up and I’ll be there…shit, sorry.”

“Sure,” Izzy smiled at her brother’s awkwardness, she had missed him terribly.

X X X

Alec felt vaguely human again after his shower, but wished he’d chosen a different outfit, climbing the fire escape in his new sky blue button down and jeans was no easy task. He’d wanted to look nice when he met Magnus again for the first time in what felt like forever.

“Hey, sorry I’m late” he called to the group. They parted quickly at the sound of his voice, all eyes locking on him. He got the feeling that he had interrupted something and squirmed under their gaze.

“Looking sharp,” the blond called over to him approvingly.

The red head smiled politely and took a seat next to the brunette who gave him a friendly wink. Magnus on the other hand just stood stock still, eyes locked on Alec intensely. Alec could feel a heat rising up his chest at the gaze and couldn’t tear his own away. There was a chemistry there that neither could deny.

“Uh hum” The blonde coughed indiscreetly, breaking their connection. Alec flushed and cleared his throat looking away.

“Champagne?” Magnus asked equally affected by their reunion. He had missed Alec more than he could say but the overriding sensation in his body was lust. Alec had taken his breath away once again.

“I’m not much of a drinker,” Alec politely refused,

“No?” Magnus asked fondly, remembering the series of upturned faces Alec had pulled whenever he had tried something new. “ A bar tender who doesn’t drink, interesting?”

“I’m not much of a bar tender either,” Alec quipped, the self deprecation clearly a joke this time. Magnus was relived to hear laughter in Alec’s voice, he was in a better place than when last they’d met.

They caught each other’s eyes again sharing an unspoken conversation, the air turning thick. “So Magnus, you introducing us or what?” the blond interrupted again, he seemed to have an uncanny knack for that.

“Of course…forgive me” Magnus flourished, “ Alec these are my friends, Jace, Isabelle and Clary.” he pointed each one out in turn. They all missed Alec as much as Magnus did and they thought it was time that they coaxed him back out of his fortress of solitude, maybe seeing a few other familiar faces would help. They’d glamoured their runes so they would appear as normal as possible though, best to start off slowly.

“Hi,” Alec waved kind of lamely in response, he was nervous.

They all stood in awkward silence for a minute, none of them wanting to test the water first.

“So uh, you guys do this often or is this a special occasion?” Alec took a seat next to Izzy when they finally made a move, he felt at ease around her.

“Alec you offend me… if this was a special occasion I would have dressed up!” Magnus teased,

“I’m pretty sure you couldn’t dress down if you tried,” Alec smiled, taking in the view appreciatively. Today Magnus wore a deep blue silk shirt, co-ordinated with a patterned waistcoat, neck scarf and shock of blue in his hair.

“Flatterer.” Magnus replied, unable to stop the husky flirtation that overcame his voice. He’d warned himself against this but he found he couldn’t stop.

The trio of Shadowhunters shared a knowing look. Alec may not remember who he was but if his reaction to Magnus was anything to go by, he was still very much in there.

X X X

“Damn sorry,” Alec said, standing to take a call and walking towards the roof ledge for privacy.

Brunch had quickly dissolved into pre-dinner drinks, the sun hanging low in the sky. He felt an easy camaraderie with his new companions, but maybe that was just the few champagne’s he’d finally allowed himself to have.

“Everything ok?” Izzy asked as Alec rejoined the group.

“Yeah, just one of the other bartenders called in sick, so I’ve gotta go,” Alec explained apologetically.

“Stay,” Magnus encouraged languidly, “I’m sure I could conjure up another pair of hands to help at the bar.”

Clary couldn’t contain her tipsy giggle at Magnus’ deliberate double meaning. Alec looked between the two clearly not getting the joke.

“Hey, I’ll have you know I don’t shirk my responsibilities thank you very much,” Alec admonished in mock seriousness.

“No, you don’t,” Magnus agreed seriously before choosing his next words carefully. He knew what he was about to say was brazen but he wanted so badly to trigger something in Alec’s mind.

“Go do your job bartender… I’m not going anywhere.”

The momentary change in Alec’s expression told Magnus that he had struck a chord. He felt somewhat guilty for the inner upheaval he knew he was causing but he was desperate. He needed that recognition more than he needed air.

'You can’t have him back either way,’ Magnus’ mind chided, ’You can’t have both…remember’

Alec backed away with a half hearted “Bye” and silently counted to 10 as he climbed down the fire escape. It would have been easier to take the stairs down through Magnus’ place, but he found he couldn’t bring himself to do it. The action too familiar in the scariest way.

Chapter 12

It was Magnus’ turn to be haunted by memories that night as he lay under his red sheets alone, arm stretched out over the empty space where Alec belonged.

'They’re beautiful …. you’re beautiful.’

'I’m just kidding’

'Were you really afraid I was gonna go?’

Alec’s casual laugh flickered through the air around him and he felt his heart pick up speed as he remembered Alec’s touch, soft yet commanding. Arousal sparked through Magnus as the memory turned heated. He allowed his eyes to shift as the electric remnants of that night coursed through him, bringing him to the brink of a pleasure he hadn’t known since he had left Alec behind.

He glanced at the clock, just after midnight, Alec would be at Pandemonium for a few more hours yet.

With an unquenchable thirst to see him Magnus threw back the sheets and marched purposefully to his closet. Pandemonium would be getting an impromptu visit from it’s illustrious owner tonight. He was walking into the lion’s den by letting this temptation control him, but he was the lion he reminded himself, the den was his to control.

X X X

Alec’s poor heart leapt out of his chest as he caught sight of Magnus strutting down the Pandemonium stair case, quite literally like he owned the place. He was dressed to the nine’s and then some, hair now styled in a larger than life mohawk, eyes lined heavily with black and his shirt slashed open to the waist. If Alec hadn’t known he was gay before tonight, this ensemble would have confirmed any doubts.

Magnus oozed lust and danger with every step and it wasn’t long before he had a crowd of onlookers following his every move.

“Drool’s not a good look on you, Alec” Em said as she found the object of Alec’s distraction.

If tonight’s Magnus was sex personified than the Magnus who had given both he and his friend a job was heaven itself. Alec marvelled at how one person could be so many different things.

Magnus had placed a strong glamour on the club when the mundane and former Shadowhunter had come to work there. They wouldn’t see anything they shouldn’t and more importantly no-one would recognise Alec for who he used to be. His safety was paramount.

“Whatever,” Alec blushed sullenly, stealing glances back at Magnus whenever he could.

“Oh, lighten up, you’re too easy to mess with,” Em laughed, hugging Alec’s arm, “Look, I mean, damn I get it… If guys were my thing you’d have a fight on your hands.”

“He’s not interested in me like that,” Alec downplayed. Sure Magnus flirted with him and there had been a connection between them on the roof tonight, but Alec got the impression that 'flirt’ was Magnus’ default setting so it didn’t really count.

“Oh yeah right…my mistake, he just hands out apartments and jobs to all the cute boys.” Em teased, “He wants you bad…”

Alec felt his blush deepen as desire pooled within him at the thought and looked back over to Magnus, this time catching his eye. The fire he found in them turned his knees to jelly and he was glad he had the bar to lean on.

“You want him too, admit it… you like the mysterious ones.”

“He’s not being cryptic, he’s being coy,” Alec recited absently,

“What?” Em reacted to the very un-Alec thing to say, “and I said mysterious not cryptic.”

“I uh, I don’t know, I think it’s something I heard once?” Alec said, too dazed by Magnus to realise it was another memory trying to break through.

Magnus dug his palms into his chair, he could hear every word and the thought of Alec remembering that moment, the fact that he hadn’t denied wanting him too was threatening to tear through his resolve. He shouldn’t have come here tonight, images of the first time he had lain eyes on Alec were too easily conjured within this place. He was still on edge from his unfulfilled dream and his control wouldn’t hold out all night. This had definitely been a bad idea.

X X X

“Need a ride home?”

Magnus’ voice startled Alec, he thought he was alone as he tidied around the now empty club. In truth he had been, Magnus had left hours ago, his nerves too painfully on edge to stay any longer, but he hadn’t liked the idea of Alec travelling home alone… or that was the excuse he gave himself.

“Sure,” Alec said, trying to hide the shock in his voice, “I just need to finish up a few things?”

“I’ll wait,” Magnus leaned against the bar and watched Alec work. It gave him time to figure out how they would actually get home. He’d neglected to factor that in when he had portalled himself there. Sending off a quick text he relaxed and admired the view.

Alec wore a simple white shirt and black slacks, standard attire for all his staff, but there was nothing standard about the way Alec pulled it off. He’d rolled the sleeves up to his elbows, out of the way, and the neon club lights cast a warm red glow over his skin. Magnus yearned to reach out and touch…

No’ he told himself. He couldn’t take advantage of the situation, touching was out of bounds.

“Ok, I’m ready,” Alec said, pulling Magnus back to reality.

“The car’s waiting out front,” Magnus held out an arm to lead the way.

“Nice!” Alec said, taking in the sleek black town car in front of them.

Magnus held the door open for him, gesturing for him to scoot over to the far side, so he could slide in next to him, “Well, I’m glad you approve.”

A loaded tension filled the car as they travelled in silence, each taking stolen glances that were cut short when the other met their eyes. There was an intense energy buzzing back and forth between them and neither could relax. They wanted each other and both somehow knew that now, one way or another, before the night was over, something was going to give.

X X X

Alec waited by the elevator as Magnus discussed something with the driver. He could just as easily gone straight up to his apartment, and he had a feeling that’s what Magnus was giving him time to do by stalling outside. He was giving him an out, an opportunity to end the night there and then,…but Alec waited.

A mixture of relief and fear washed over Magnus as he saw Alec waiting for him, calmly standing his ground in front of the elevator.

'Don’t do this Magnus’ his head warned him.

Wordlessly he ignored his instincts and joined Alec in the elevator, his heart skipping several beats as Alec pushed the button to his own floor but not Magnus’…an unspoken invitation.

Alec couldn’t hear the sound of the elevator over his own beating heart, it felt like it was going to charge out of his chest. He stepped out onto his floor not daring to look if Magnus had followed.

Magnus stood between the hall and the elevator, his hand holding the door open. His body trembling in anticipation.

'You can’t do this,’ his head scolded,

'I can’t not,’ his heart replied.

Realeasing his grip he stepped out, stepping inches behind Alec’s back, causing him to fumble his keys as Magnus’ breath tickled his neck.

'Your skin tingles when they stand close enough to feel their breath’

Alec turned and leant against the locked door, head tipped back slightly by Magnus’ proximity. Magnus placed a hand on either side of the door, holding Alec gently in place, not that he could bring himself to move anyway.

Alec felt the warmth of Magnus’ breath against his cheek as they moved ever closer and trailed a hand loosely up Magnus’ abs to his chest, feeling the softness of his skin. Magnus rested his forehead against Alec’s, savouring the touch, breathing Alec in. His right hand left the door to cup Alec’s face, lips just inches away, his whole body pressing Alec into the door now as Alec flattened one hand to his chest, the other holding gently on to his hip…

And that’s when he saw it…

That same look of determination in Alec’s eyes from the first time they had kissed, for Alec, this was that first time all over again. Pulling back before their lips met, Magnus sighed, “I’m sorry… I can’t do this.”

“What?…I…"Alec stuttered, his hands now left empty, "Am I doing something wrong?”

Magnus died a little at the words, that lack of recognition the worst 'I told you so,’ he could have gotten. “No such thing.” His voice cracked on each word before he squared his shoulders and stood firm, “it’s not you…” He cut the cliche off but it was too late, the damage was done.

“It’s complicated … We can be friends,” Alec churned out coldly as he turned his back to Magnus unlocking the door. The coldness masking genuine pain, but a pain that felt too deep for what this moment was. Magnus didn’t owe him an explanation, it was just one almost kiss…so why did Alec feel this so acutely.

“Alec…I,” Magnus was cut off as the door closed firmly in his face.

“Damn, that’s what that feels like ’

Feeling utterly ashamed of himself, Magnus withdrew to his penthouse. How was he going to fix this new mess he had made?

Chapter 13

"Magnus…hi!” Alec spluttered, voice almost a falsetto as they all but collided in his doorway. Magnus’ hand was still poised to knock as Alec almost barrelled into him.

Magnus lowered his hand and took a step back, straightening his still pristine shirt for something to do with his hands. “You’ve been avoiding me.” The words were blunt but didn’t hold any heat to them.

“No… I uh was… You know… Work … Busy…no I haven’t.” Alec stuttered gesticulating widely.

Magnus had to bite back a smile at the familiar trait. He kind of loved making Alec lost for words. “I haven’t seen you in days and when I did it was the back of your head as you deliberately walked the wrong way to your floor so you wouldn’t have to pass me.”

“Yeah well,” Alec floundered, arms folded as he leaned a hip against the door frame.

“Alec… I just came to apologise for…” Magnus waived his hand in the air, as if the memory would spring from it without him having to actually say the words…'almost kissing you.’

“No need, I understand.”

'oh but you don’t’ Magnus wanted to cry out.

“I guess I should apologise too.. I overreacted.” Alec unfolded his arms, taking down one barrier at a time. Alec shrugged his shoulder gently to indicate that he didn’t know what to do here. They just stared each other down silently. Magnus folded one arm around his waist and rubbed his mouth with his hand, trying to find the right words. Nothing short of the truth was good enough but he couldn’t give it.

Magnus leaned back, pivoting on his heel as a sign that he meant to leave. Alec felt a cold dread seep into his bones at the thought that this was it, that he might lose his chance to tell Magnus how he felt..“

'On every mission I’ve ever been on, I’ve never felt that type of fear…Magnus I…I love you.

"Magnus wait,” Alec called out, Magnus had started to walk away while he was trapped in his daydream, “Magnus I …I like you.”

The blood froze in Magnus’ veins as Alec’s voice and cadence matched that historic moment in their relationship, the diluted words stung sharply.

“I like you too,” he felt almost sick lessening the moment this way, but Alec wasn’t to know.

Alec reached out, holding the underside of Magnus’ forearm for fear he would run from him. “I’d like to see if this could be something.” He confessed.

“So would I.” Magnus moved Alec’s hand back and placed it against Alec’s own chest, before covering it with his own. “But I’m not in a place where I can do that right now. I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have led you on the way I did, it was unfair.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me,” Alec said kindly, if anyone understood not being in the right head space it was him. He released Magnus’ hand and they stood in front of each other, strangers once more. “How about we start again and see where it goes.”

“I’d like that,” Magnus accepted the gesture but he knew now, more than ever, that he would never walk that fine line again. He would be the best friend that Alec had ever had if that’s what it took, but until it was Alexander’s eyes looking back at him again it would go no further.

Chapter 14

Magnus listened for any sounds of Alec moving downstairs. Since their difficult door way conversation they had largely kept to themselves. Magnus didn’t trust himself not to break despite his assertion that they could be friends but he couldn’t avoid Alec forever if they wanted to stand any chance of ever getting Alexander back.

Magnus didn’t know what excuse he would could up with for accidentally running into him but he’d cross that bridge when he came to it.

“Oh Alec? What a surprise” Magnus said feigning shock as he rounded the corner of Alec’s floor.

“Magnus,” Alec blushed, he’d just woken up from a particularly memorable dream and was sure Magnus must be able to tell. But Alec had figure if dreams were all he was going to get he might as well put some effort into them.

'I’m all for effort

Alec closed his eyes for the briefest of moment, choosing to ignore his ever present and ever frustrating inner voice more often than not these days.

“Doing some laundry?” Magnus asked, stating the obvious really as Alec stood there laundry bag in hand.

“Ugh yeah,” he replied awkwardly. They hadn’t really mastered the art of small talk that didn’t have flirtatious undertones yet.

“I’ll help.” Magnus said brightly,

Alec laughed and relaxed, “Um, no offence Magnus but uh, I’ve seen your clothes. I dread to imagine how much that shirt alone cost you. You don’t strike me as the kind of guy that does laundry.”

“Well no,” Magnus agreed, albeit not for the reasons Alec suspected. Magic had many benefits, “but perhaps I could keep you company.”

“Sure,” Alec smiled, “speaking of company. I saw Izzy and the others on my floor last night when I got home. Were they going to some kind of rave or something… they had some pretty interesting ink going on?” Alec stopped as Magnus froze in place, “I didn’t mean to be rude…”

“You saw them?” Magnus asked. The only time Alec had seem them before they had been glamoured their runes to keep them hidden from him. They had no need to do that when they made their late night patrols but Alec shouldn’t have been able to see them at all, let alone their runes.

“Yeah, but it’s no problem” Alec backpeddled, afraid that Magnus thought he was complaining about the lateness of the hour, “it doesn’t bother me. Just forget I said anything.”

“No, no, Alec. I have asked them to be more considerate about the hours that they keep. I’ll speak to them.” Magnus covered, offering no explanation as to why they were there and what the tattoos meant. Alec waited but Magnus clearly wasn’t going to continue so he thought better than to ask.

“How about we take a trip up to my place?” Magnus asked trying to change the subject., “Laundry can wait. I’m no bartender like yourself but I do make a mean cocktail…” If Alec was seeing things he shouldn’t be able to that meant that his brain was likely more Shadowhunter than mundane now… That he might be able stand that little extra push in the right direction.

“Sure, why not. After all the times I’ve waited on you I’ll let you do something for me for a change."Alec joked, a strange sensation passing over him at that thought, as though what he’d said was wrong somehow… backwards. Flashes of recollection sparked in his mind and disembodied words filled the air.

There’s a greater demon on the loose. I need ….“

Magnus, I know I have no right to ask for favours but…“

Izzy located the rift…“

"Something wrong?” Magnus asked cutting off the flood of memories abruptly as Alec counted under his breath unable to ignore it this time.

“No, no… let’s go?” Alec said, he had to get out of there. He was still uneasy about being in Magnus’ space but maybe the change of scenery would clear his head.

X X X

“Well here we are, Chez Magnus,” Magnus joked as he opened the door with an exaggerated flourish… by hand. Not being able to use magic around Alec was difficult but he’d become accustomed to it.

Alec nodded in approval taking in the surroundings. Why had he avoided coming here for so long… it was just an apartment.

“Oh you moved the blue chair,” he said unthinking, pointing to the chair’s new corner position.

“Yeah,” Magnus replied automatically, “I needed a change…” he stalled, confused eyes meeting Alec’s own as he turned, the significance of that statement registering with them both. This hadn’t been what he’d intended by bringing Alec here, he’d intended to test out old memories one at a time until something stuck… This was too soon.

“How did I know you moved the blue chair Magnus?” Alec asked, fear and uncertainty in his voice, as more memories assaulted him. Images of Magnus sitting at his desk, a kiss on the balcony, holding Magnus in his arms on that very chair. He tried his breathing exercises but the constant barrage of memories was overpowering him…“I’ve never been here before…”

“Alec, just relax,” Magnus said approaching and taking Alec by the shoulders. He could tell that Alec wanted to bolt straight for the door. He was terrified and confused and Magnus knew making him stay wasn’t fair but they were on the verge of a breakthough.

“I need to get out of here,” Alec whispered, “I think I’m going crazy… I have to go…”

Alec gripped a table to steady himself, eyes locking on a strip of photo’s tucked into a painting, his own face looking back out at him. “How… that’s us…what?…”

Magnus cast his arm to the side ascAlec made a move to run and the door slammed shut with a flash of blue.

“What…what did you…what are you doing… I can’t ….breathe…” Alec clutched his chest and fell to his knees as his brain revolted against him. Mixing together old and new, the real and the fake overwhelming his mind until the blackness overtook him and he lay limply in Magnus’ arms.

“It’s ok Alexander, I’ve got you… I’m here.” Magnus whispered into Alec’s hair as he cradled him.“I’m here.”

Chapter 15

“How are we going to explain this all to him?” Jace asked frustrated, of all the ways they had discussed breaking the news, scaring it into him hadn’t been part of the plan. “I can’t believe you used magic Magnus, we agreed we’d let him set the pace.”

“I’m well aware Jace, but given that you weren’t here then I suggest you don’t judge my actions…”

“Well, I’m just saying…” Jace sighed feeling guilty. He couldn’t blame Magnus, didn’t everyone revert to what they were used to when they were scared. “I just down know where we’re supposed to start…”

“How about with… you’re a Shadowhunter…” Alec’s voice came from behind them, a hard edge to it that could only mean one thing… “I remember,” he said, answering the unspoken question. He held up his arms, now adorned with runes again, as proof.

He couldn’t meet the gaze of anyone in the room. It all just felt wrong, he was himself again, but he wasn’t. He knew the past, he knew who he was, but he also remembered who he had been, if only for a short time, and how he wanted to be that Alec again.

Izzy ran to him, locking her arms around his waist, pulling him out of his own head. He held his sister tight as the normalcy of that action soothed him. “I can’t be here.” he pleaded into his sister’s hair as he hugged her. Locking eyes with him she smiled sadly, and shared a knowing look with Jace.

Settling back into the military stance that was iconic of Alec the Shadowhunter, he forced his eyes to meet Magnus’ who so far had been silent.

“Magnus…” Alec’s voice caught in his throat, pained at the thought of how they’d been so easy and free in each other’s company the last few months. How they could have had everything they wanted in that other life… “thank you for the apartment. I’ll be out of your way tonight…”

“You’re never in my way, Alexander” Magnus said, the name slipping unnoticed from his lips, hoping the olive branch he was offering was clear.

“I have to go,” he said flatly, a sheen in his eyes that betrayed his cool exterior.

Magnus watched Alec walk down the hallway until he was completely out of sight, hoping with every step that Alec would turn around. When he finally stood there alone he took a deep breath and returned to his apartment. Consumed by an emptiness he had hoped never to feel again.

X X X

It had been a hard couple of weeks, but gradually Alec had re-adjusted back to his old life. He’d re-taken control of the Institute just a few days ago and things were starting to feel normal… well mostly anyway.

He still dreamt of Magnus every night, he could tell the fantasies from memories this time, and there was a healthy dose of both. He knew he owed Magnus more than the meagre thanks he had given him before running as fast he could from the loft, he just hadn’t been able to work up the courage yet. He felt embarrassed that his want for Magnus had been so plain all those weeks when Magnus clearly still didn’t want to be with him.

I’m not in a place where I can do that.’ Magnus may as well have just repeated “I can’t have both,” and been done with it.

Now, standing here outside his door, he hesitantly drew his hand to knock, hoping this time he’d be let inside.

“"Alec?” Magnus said surprised, he hadn’t been expecting to see him. “What?” Magnus asked as a crooked smile crossed Alwc’s face and he rolled his eyes.

“Alec,” he said his own name, it sounded wrong, “I guess that’s what you call me now..”.Hey, it’s a step above Shadowhunter so I’ll take it,“ Alec added dryly.

Magnus opened his mouth to reply but found he didn’t know what to say. He just took in the man standing at his door and tried to get the measure of who he was now.

He had the look of Alexander, standing tall like the soldier he was, a slight softness to his eyes that he only got when looking at Magnus, but he spoke like Alec, a carefree wit that Magnus was silently glad he hadn’t lost.

Magnus took this all in as the silence encompassed them and he realised in that moment that Alec had always been both of these people, he remembered the untroubled laughter that had echoed from his bedroom the first time Alec had spent the night. Alec hadn’t really changed when he’d lost his memories, he’d just lost the need to keep that other side of him so guarded.

"I was out of line when I called you that,” Magnus apologised,

“No you weren’t,” Alec disagreed, “we’d been taking advantage of your magic for too long, I should have seen that sooner. You were right to call me out on it.”

They stood awkwardly in the doorway, neither wanting to make the first move. Alec broke first. “Magnus,” Alec said, clearing his throat and shifting his feet uncomfortably, remnants of the other Alec breaking through the stoic front, “I need to talk to you …I mean, would it be ok if I came in… please?” he corrected. Hadn’t he just said that they had demanded too much of Magnus in the past, that needed to change.

“Of course,” Magnus said noting the change and swinging the door open wide. “How have you been?” he said, chiding himself for such an inane question, but he didn’t know what else to say.

“Myself… for a change.” Alec joked,

Magnus gave him a wry smile, “We never did have that drink,” he said gesturing to the drinks cabinet. Alec showing up like this had caught him off guard and he felt like he was 10 steps behind and failing to catch up.

“No thanks,” Alec waved off the offer, he needed a clear head. “I just wanted to say thank you for everything you did… when I was the other me.”

He had wanted to say when I wasn’t myself, but the truth was, he had been himself, just with a few less weights on his shoulders.

“I know my previous actions would suggest otherwise Alec, but I am always here if you need me.” Magnus said,

“I know,” Alec nodded, “Well, I just wanted to say thank you, it didn’t seem right to do it over the phone, so I’ll go…” Alec started towards the door when Magnus called his name.

“Alexander,” Magnus voice cracked as he let each syllable ring out, “You have nothing to thank me for, this…everything that happened to you… what she put you through… that’s all on me and I am so sorry.”

“It’s ok,” Alec smiled kindly, as he turned his back to leave.

“Don’t do that,” Magnus discouraged. Alec stopped in his tracks hoping that Magnus was asking him not to leave, but knowing that was too much to ask as Magnus elaborated. “Don’t absolve me of what happened, you have a right to be angry with me.”

“But I’m not,” Alec explained, “We’ve both made mistakes, let’s just leave them in the past where they belong… ok”? He added asking permission almost.

“Ok?” Magnus sighed, relief mixing with anticipation. They had reached some kind of common ground but there was still a gaping hole in it that they couldn’t bridge. Magnus knew the ball was in his court now, he had been the one to walk away, if he wanted to fix this he had to be the one to speak up…but he was too terrified to find his voice.

“Right … well, I’m leaving…thanks again and goodbye I guess.” Alec said letting out a defeated breath before stilling in the doorway, shaking his head. “Ok look, I’m not good with words but I can’t just leave it like this again…Magnus, I love you and… no, actually that’s pretty much it really… I love you and I just need you to know that ok?…”

Magnus looked at Alec in awe, amazed by how, with a string of simple words and a matter of fact shake of his head he could say so much.

Alec wasn’t asking for anything from him. He was telling him, “I understand how you feel,” …. “I’m here no matter what happens next.”… “I love you even if you don’t love me back.”

He was just letting Magnus know that he was loved, unquestionably. That was just the fact of the matter and it was Magnus’ to do with as he wished. Magnus didn’t know how he had been blessed with this love but he knew better than to let it go again.

Magnus smiled and stepped into Alec’s space, reaching out to fix a collar that wasn’t crooked, knowing that Alec would understand the moment he was recreating. Alec smiled and shook his head, smile stretching uncontrollably across his face as he realised what Magnus was doing.

“You’re great at words,” Magnus beamed as he took in that smile. Keeping his hand on Alec’s arm he caressed his shoulder with his thumb. “Myself on the other hand… I find that I’m suddenly at a loss…Alexander,” he whispered, relishing in the contented breath Alec released at hearing it. “Alexander,” he repeated, breathing it against Alec’s lips, close enough to touch but holding back ever so slightly.

Closing his eyes he slid his hand up Alec’s arms to cup his face, Alec melted into the touch. The last time Magnus had done this he had been saying goodbye, he opened his eyes briefly and shook that thought away. He closed the distance and tasted tears on Alec’s lips, swallowing back his own as he pulled Alec close. He had his Alexander back and he would never let go again.

Chapter 14

A light breeze dancing across his skin woke Magnus and he smiled reaching out for Alec, freezing when he found the bed empty and cold yet again.

'Please be outside, please be outside’ he whispered the mantra to himself as he threw on a robe and went in search of his boyfriend.

“Hey, did I wake you?” Alec asked as Magnus wrapped his arms around Alec’s waist from behind. “Jesus, Magnus your heart is racing. What’s wrong?”

“I thought you left,” Magnus’ voice was muffled, his head buried into Alec’s chest now they faced each other.

Alec pulled Magnus into a desperate hug peppering kisses to his temple before whispering in his ear, “I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”

The rhythm of Magnus’ heart steadily slowed as they held each other, “Come back inside, it’s cold,” Magnus whispered tugging gently on Alec’s hand.

They settled back into bed, holding each other close. They had fallen into bed pretty much as soon as they had reunited, not wanting to waste time with words, but now that they lay there in the dark, the silence seemed full of words wanting to be spoken.

“Are you ok?” Alec asked, the feeling of Magnus’ heart beating that hard still in his mind. He never wanted Magnus to think him not being there in the morning meant something that terrible again.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” Magnus scooted closer and ran a hand down Alec’s face. Alec caught it when it reached his cheek and moved to hold it against his chest.

“I’m serious Magnus, I know I’m the one that forgot everything but … it can’t have been easy being the one that was forgotten either, I’m…”

“Alec, I swear, if you apologise for that I’ll…”

“You’ll what?” Alec challenged warmly, a smile on his face.

“"Never you mind,” Magnus grinned, before pausing slightly, “It was difficult and I was terrified at the thought that I would never get to speak to you again, the real you… when I had so much I needed to say.”

Alec placed a soft kiss to Magnus’ lips and cradled the back of his head as they rested foreheads together, “You don’t have to say anything Magnus,” Alec reassured, knowing that he was referring to their previous fight.

“Yes I do,” Magnus pulled back to look Alec in the eye, “I was wrong, I thought I had a choice to make, but the only one imposing that choice on me…was me.”

“And you usually give such great advice,” Alec teased, letting Magnus know that all was forgiven. He’d meant what he said before, mistakes were made on both sides. It was the past and that was where it would stay.

Magnus let out a joyous laugh that he hadn’t been able to muster in a long time and pulled Alec to him, kissing him long and deep. Alec shifted his weight so that he lay on top of him, knee nestled between Magnus’ legs. “I love you,” he kissed into Magnus’ lips.

Magnus flipped them so Alec was beneath him now, hands pressed to his chest, “I love you too… in every life.” Alec slid his hand to Magnus’ neck and pulled his face back down to his, carding his fingers through Magnus’ hair, his face now completely encompassed by Magnus’ hands.

Alec chased Magnus’ lips as he leaned back to remove his robe, throwing it haphazardly to the floor. Magnus laughed into the kiss as their lips were reunited, now sitting in Alec’s lap, both of his hands pushing through his hair, his once perfect style now going in all directions. Magnus always looked great, but all messed up like this was how Alec liked him best. This was for him to see and no-one else.

Magnus closed the distance between them, pressing his finger tips into the muscles of Alec’s back, head tucked in Alec’s neck as he ran his hands down to his waistband. Alec squirmed away from the touch, ticklish and the sound that he let out could only be described as a giggle. “Not a word,” he warned as he flipped them both back over, strong arms holding Magnus beneath him.

Magnus bared his neck in laughter at the look on Alec’s face, the sound turning breathy when Alec placed wet kisses down his throat. The warmth seeped into Magnus’ skin and he squeezed his eyes shut as he felt the shift overtake him.

“Look at me?” Alec asked softly, beaming as Magnus revealed his cat eyes slowly. “there you are…still beautiful.”

Tears he’d been holding back flowed freely now, Magnus couldn’t have been happier if he had tried. He ran his hands down Alec’s back with a renewed fervour, palm flat, feeling every muscle, finally resting it in the small of Alec’s back.

Soft kisses turned breathless and gentle touches took on new intensity as they got lost in each other completely. Holding each other close as the night met the morning, they were ready to take on this new life together.

I Destroy Them... (Song Request)

Fandom: Game of Thrones

Characters: Margaery Tyrell, female reader, Loras Tyrell *mentioned*, Olenna Tyrell *mentioned*

Pairing: Margaery x Reader

Warning: Smut (f x f)

Summary: For anon who requested:

Could I please get a Margery Tyrell X Reader smut based on Destroyer by Saint motel? I need more Margery always x

Here you go! Listen to the song here

Originally posted by snows-os

“Alright, I know. Please just stop. I feel bad enough as it is without you rubbing salt into the wound.” You sighed, slumping down into a stool by the hearth with a cup of ale in your hand. You knew your friend was right; you shouldn’t have fallen for it. For her. After all, she was highborn, you were lowborn. But you couldn’t help yourself.

“Well, you’re going to have to pull yourself together or else you’ll be looking for a new job. Just don’t let her see that she’s got you.” Your friend told you as she stirred the soup she was cooking over the fire.

Keep reading

The Twin

The original prompt, by @heavenlytheshield, was for JJ to have a twin that she wasn’t aware of, who came to work at the BAU, and for her to fall in love with Spencer, but for the sake of time and efficiency, I altered it so that JJ already knew she had a twin. :) 

Side note: I was so happy because there’s all these pictures of AJ and Matthew that I could use for this fic. <3

My twin sister’s name is Jennifer Jareau (LaMontagne), and she’s older than me by all of two minutes, which she never flaunted in my face because that’s not who JJ is, but I’m still a little bitter about it, because that’s who I am. Jennifer has always been the more level-headed of the two of us, while I’ve always been the more emotional. For me, it’s the little things that get me-all the time. For her, she gets really, really, really emotional-when she gets emotional, which happens about once every 10 years. 

Did I mention that I’m the one who’s prone to exaggerate, as well? 

I’ve never really been one to take things that belong to my sister. I tried that once, and it ended very badly for me. There’s a reason she’s tactically trained and I’m not, let’s just say that. 

However, when I was offered a position as an assistant technical analyst with the BAU, it was a job I couldn’t resist taking. JJ or not, this job was a dream. I couldn’t quite figure out how to tell her, so I just didn’t. I accepted the job and showed up. 

Of course, there’s that thing where I look exactly like my sister, who works with these people every day. So when I walked into Penelope Garcia’s lab, she stared. 

“Um, hi,” she said. 

“Hey, I’m (Y/N), the new assistant.”

“You-I’m sorry, I just…you look like someone we work with,” she said. “Like, freaky-scary look a lot like her.” I smiled. 

“Jennifer Jareau, right?” I said. 

“Yeah, did you meet her already?” she asked. 

“I’ve…literally known her longer than anyone else. I’m her twin sister.” 

I watched Penelope’s jaw drop. 

“Her-JJ has a twin?” she asked. 

“She does,” I confirmed. 

“Wow. Why didn’t she tell me that my new assistant was her twin?” Garcia asked. When I cringed, she seemed to realize what was going on. 

“Ohh, she doesn’t know, does she?” she asked, and I shook my head. 

“I couldn’t quite figure out how to tell her,” I answered. 

“Well, she’s going to know very soon,” Penelope said, “because we have a team meeting.” 

I was so nervous as I followed Garcia into the conference room. Of course, just my luck, Jennifer was already there. She looked up and stared at me. 

“(Y/N)?” she said. 

“Hey,” I replied. 

“Are you-did you get the analyst job?” she asked. I nodded. 

“Um, JJ?”

I looked up at the sound of a voice, and made eye contact with a tall, thin man with messy curls and hazel eyes. There was something about him that just looked interesting on sight, and I held his gaze. 

“I didn’t know you had a twin,” he said to JJ, his eyes flickering to her before back to me. 

“Well, I do,” she replied. “Clearly.” 

“Guys, this is (Y/N), who is obviously my twin sister,” JJ said. 

“Why didn’t you tell us that she was Garcia’s new assistant?” the dark-haired female Agent asked. 

“I didn’t know,” Jennifer told them. 

“Oh.” 

“Which I’ll deal with later,” JJ continued, giving me her JJ look, which I’ve never been able to replicate, even though she and I are identical. 

“For now, let’s introduce you to everyone,” she said. She pointed at the dark-haired woman first. “Agent Emily Prentiss,” she said. She went around the table, introducing me to Agents Morgan, Rossi, and Hotchner. She got around to the tall guy, who smiled at me. 

“(Y/N), this is Dr.Spencer Reid,” she said. 

“Hi,” I said. 

“Alright, let’s get to work,” Hotchner said. 


I’d been working with the BAU for nearly a week, and JJ and I had come to an agreement. I was in the lab when there was a knock against the doorframe. I glanced around to find Spencer Reid standing there. 

“Hey, Dr.Reid,” I said. 

“You don’t have to call me that,” he replied. “Spencer or Reid is fine.” I smiled and nodded as he handed me a cup of coffee. I looked between him and the cup quizzically. 

“Non-alcoholic Irish cream, liberal amounts of sugar, a little bit of vanilla,” he rattled off. “Right?” I nodded slowly, raising the cup to my lips and taking a drink. It was perfect; better, even, than the way I make it. 

“Yeah,” I replied, and smiled. “Thank you, Spencer.” 

“You’re welcome. I-I have an eidetic memory, so that’s why I knew how you take your coffee,” he explained. 

“You have an eidetic memory?” I asked, and he nodded. 

“That’s…absolutely incredible,” I replied. “Eidetic memory in adults is exceedingly rare.” He nodded his head. 

“Yes. But so is my IQ and the number of words I read per minute.” 

“Which is?” I prompted. 

“My IQ or my word count?” he asked. 

“Both.” 

“I have an IQ of 187, and read twenty thousand words per minute,” he said. I stared at him. 

“That’s unreal,” I said. “You’re actually a genius.” 

“Well, I don’t believe in the accurate quantification of intelligence, but essentially, yes,” he told me. I smiled at him. 

“You are really something, Spencer Reid,” I said. 

“What do you mean by that?” he asked. 

“I mean you’re…extraordinary,” I replied. “I’ve never met anyone like you before.” 

“Most people aren’t particularly fond of me,” he said. 

“Why?” 

“Because I rattle off facts and statistics, because I grew up in Vegas and win every game of cards, not to mention every game of chess. Because I sometimes come off as a know-it-all, and it frustrates people.” 

“It doesn’t frustrate me,” I said. “I find you very likable, actually.” 

“You do?” he asked, sounding surprised. 

“Yes,” I nodded. “I can’t imagine why anyone doesn’t like you.” 

“That’s…kind of you,” he said. I shrugged my shoulders. 

“I’m only being honest.” There was a moment of silence. 

“(Y/N)?” 

“Yeah?” 

“I was wondering if you’d like to have dinner with me sometime?” His words came out in a rush, and I smiled. 

“I would love to, Spencer.” 

Angel VIII - Writer!AU

Originally posted by awwsehun

Summary - Being the assistant of the writer Do Kyungsoo is rather.. interesting.
A/N: Don’t beat me up pls.. :x 
Warning: This might be really angsty..

Chapters:

(1) / (2) / (3) / (4) / (5) / (6) / (7) / (8) / (9) / (10)

You have heard that everyone in their lives will experience the taste of bittersweet farewell at least once, but they never told you that it would have been this bitter. Especially because you were never going have that farewell with Kyungsoo.

Keep reading

The Joker x Reader  * How it all started* (Part 1)

Prequel to : The Joker X Reader 4 (part 1)  

http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/150118262261/the-joker-x-reader-4-part-1-read-part-2-here

The Joker X Reader 4 (part 2)

http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/150368518196/the-joker-x-reader-4-part-2

    You enter the club, inhaling the scent you missed so much: cigarettes, alcohol, perfume, sweat, all blending together in an intoxicating cocktail. The music is blasting in the speakers and the strong base is making the ground shake. You are heading towards the bar when you are grabbed and pushed on the dance floor.

  “Dance with me, beau…”, the guy says, trying to make a move on you.

   “Get lost!”, you shriek with a bitter look on your face, not letting him finish, while slapping his hand away. “I didn’t give you permission to touch me, did I??”

    He ignores your request, reaching for you again. You dodge his hand, move a step closer and firmly squeeze his crotch, tightening you hold to the maximum. The young man tries to push you away but he can’t: it’s not the first time you’re doing this. He whimpers in pain, hitting your arm. You won’t let go. “You were just leaving, right?”, you smirk, finally releasing your grip. The guy bends over, covering his probably already bruised pride and slides down the glass wall, squinting his eyes in pain.

************

    The Joker is upstairs in the VIP lounge, watching everything that’s going on in his club from behind the smoky windows. He suddenly starts laughing maniacally, crossing his legs. “Auch, I bet that hurt!”. Frost is glancing out there too, trying to see what amused his boss so much. “Frosty, who’s the girl with the lacy yellow dress and bright red hair?” J points out with his cane in the crowd.

     “Ahh,” Frost answers when his eyes find you. “That’s Miss Y/N,sir.”

     “That’s Y/N?!” the Joker grins. “We’ve been doing business with her for a while…Maybe I shouldn’t let you take care of things so much, Frost. I’m missing on opportunities to meet…” he pauses, biting his lower lip “…new people.”

    “Of course, boss” Frost smiles, nodding his head in agreement.

     J passes his fingers through his green hair, holding it in place for a few moments, watching you take a sit at the bar and order a drink. “Tell her everything she wants is on the house.”

    “Yes, sir” Frost replies, already on the phone.

**************

     You start sipping on your whiskey when the bartender leans towards you: ”Everything on the house tonight, miss.”

  “What? Why?…” you ask, surprised.

  The bartender points towards the VIP lounge. “Boss says so.”

   “Oh, he’s here?” you lift your glass towards the smoky windows and mutter “Thank you”. You hope he saw it.

    He did.

*************

    You end the conversation on your cell phone, debating on what to do with the information you just got.  After a few moments you decide, so you take your drink and you head towards the stairs. Up to the VIP lounge you go.

    “Hi, Frost”, you snicker, seeing he’s already coming for you.

    “Hello, miss Y/N, it’s been a while". You take his arm as he leads you upstairs. The heavy security moves out of your way.          

    “Can I see Mister J?”

   “He’s already expecting you, Miss Y/N.” Frost parts the gold beads for you and stays behind.

    You enter the luxurious room and your eyes rest on the green haired man sitting on the velvet couch. His white shirt is unbuttoned almost all the way down and you can see a lot of tattoos on his pale, toned body.

    “Baby doll,” he grins at you, revealing his silver grill, “we finally meet.”

    “Mister J, it’s a pleasure”, you reply with a flirtatious tone, continuing to analyze him.

    “Kitten, turn around, let me see you.”  You giggle, slowly spinning on your high hills, taking a sip of your whiskey as you face the Joker again.

     “Prettttyyyy…” he purrs, gesturing you to come sit on the couch.


      You take two steps towards him when your favorite song starts blasting in the club. “Mmmm, I love this song,” you sigh, closing your eyes, starting to swing your hips to the beat.

    “Mister J, dance with me,” you plead, finally putting your drink down on the mahogany table nearby. The Joker catches the serious look that lingers on your face for just a few seconds. He is a bit intrigued; he senses something is not quite right. Nevertheless, he gets off the couch and comes to meet you in the middle of the lounge. His eyes narrow, and before he finds himself in front of you, you hear his warning:

     “I don’t like games, baby doll. Are you going to tell me what the deal is? Or do I have to make you?”

    You immediately drop your fake bimbo act, completely changing your demeanor and tone of voice: “The SWAT team will raid this place soon, looking for you. I’d say you have about 10 minutes left.”

    “Hmmm…” that’s all you hear before you get pushed out of the away and he heads towards the exit. He suddenly stops in front of the door, keeping it open.

   “Are you coming?”

***********

    He’s speeding like a lunatic on the streets of Gotham, almost hitting cars and people a few times. That seems to amuse immensely, he can’t stop laughing. What a strange, interesting man, you think to yourself, opening your side window so you can feel the wind in your hair.

   “Don’t worry, doll, I’ll tell Frosty to drop your car at your place tomorrow. Where do you live?”

  “It’s OK, Mister J, I’ll steal another one. Not very fond of the color of my current one anyway. I really love your purple Lamborghini”, you turn towards him, just to meet his intense, blue gaze. Why the hell isn’t he watching the road?

   “Where…do…you…live?” he insists, pausing after each word, taking his hands off the wheel.

    “Umm..” you try to concentrate, pulling down on your short dress, “ Silver Meadows Hill.”

    “Fancy place”, he grins, with a sinister smile on his face. “Do they know what you do for a living?”  Hands on the wheel again, good.

    “They think I’m a dentist,” you confess, amused at the fact that this is very entertaining for him. He laughs again.

    “Well, actually I am a dentist; I went to school for that and I have a degree. It’s the perfect cover up.”

    “Beautiful and smart, I’m impressed,” the Joker winks and for some reason you fell your cheeks getting warm. That’s weird, you never blush. “Want me to take you home?” he suddenly offers, yanking the wheel and running over the curve.

    “No, not yet, I want to party some more. It’s my birthday today.” You don’t even know why you told him. That was stupid.

    “I’ll be damned, doll; we really need to party then. How young?” he asks, interested.

    “26.”

     “Ahhh,26, a good time to be alive,” he slams the breaks right in the middle of Gotham bridge. Holly crap, is he entirely crazy? You sure hope so. He’s definitely not boring.

    “Here, for you” he says, reaching for the glove compartment while leaning on your legs for support. You feel awkward but you resist the urge to kick him in the face like you normally would if some other guy would be doing this to you. He pulls out a box and leaves it in your lap, starting to drive again.

     “Are you sure?” you ask, uncertain, looking inside.

     “Yeah, yeah, I have another one, all yours”, J confirms, accelerating. You take out the beautiful gun that’s been personalized with diamonds and the Joker’s trademark clown face.

      “Wow, this is beautiful, thank you, Mister J”. Your heart is pounding, you love guns so much. You can tell this is an exquisite one just by holding it.

       “No problem, doll, I have to repay you somehow, right? How much money do you want?”

       “Oh, no money, Mister J, I don’t need pay for the information this time. But I definitely want this,” you chuckle, waving the pistol at him. He smirks, lifting his shoulders. “That’s fine,Y/N, I told you it’s yours. Oh, we’re getting there,” he raises his voice, excited.

       “Where are we going, Mister J?”

       “To celebrate!”, he replies, grinning his silver teeth at you. For some reason your mouth opens and you ask: “How old are you, Mister J?”

      “HA,HA,HA,HA!” his sinister laughter resonates in the car. “How old do you think I am, baby doll?”

      “Thirty…four?” you try to guess, but the truth is you find it hard to estimate.

      “Close enough,” the Joker smiles, scrunching his face like he heard the cutest thing ever. “ I saw what you did to that guy in the club,” he changes the subject and you get the hint.

     “Well,” you say, licking your lips, “I don’t like men to touch me without my permission.”

   “I touched you,” he replies and you can’t help but feel a bit of cockiness mixed with pride in his voice. “Does it mean I have your permission?” His eyes widen, waiting for the answer.

 TO BE CONTINUED

Also read - MASTERLIST :

http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/153664676321/joker-x-reader-masterlist

That went way better than expected.

Turns out both people like reading those little stories, and I also like writing them. Fortunately, I’ve still got more than few ideas in my head, so I guess I’ll keep adding more when the inspiration strikes.

Anywhere, here’s a new vignette. 


Housewarming



A knock on the door broke her concentration. Natasatch pulled her red eyes away from the tablet, looking at the entrance. In a quick motion, she laid the device on her cot, and slithered to the center of the room, a Gremlin drone following each movement. Straightening out the hoodie an engineer told her to wear, she made sure to stand as straight and non-threatening as she could manage before she answered.

“You can enter now!” She called, her speech much clearer than merely a week before.

The heavy bulkhead beeped, then slid open, and the Viper was greeted with the sight of a familiar human crossing the threshold. Malcolm gave a smile when their eyes met, as he pulled a loaded trolley covered in mismatched boxes and supplies, and Natasatch let herself relax. 

Amusingly, he needed to duck to avoid the Gremlin as it accidentally swooped too close to his head. Shooting the drone a frown, he turned his head back to his alien friend. “Hey Nat. Everything okay?”

Keep reading

So I saw your post about baby Bokushi and older brother Oreshi and I thought I'd write a little snippet...

(Just saying before I start, it’s a little twist, and instead Bokushi is born again as a kid but OUTSIDE Oreshi’s mind.)

Making his way through the Rakuzan campus, the redheaded captain, Akashi Seijuro was walking to the gymnasium hand-in-hand with a little boy. The boy was at least two feet shorter, bearing the exact same red hair of the older boy. The only difference was with his eyes. Instead of the identical red eyes that Akashi had, his left eye was golden. The younger boy looked up at Akashi with an impossibly neutral expression.

“Are we almost there yet?” Akashi sighed.

“Almost. Just be patient.” The boy said nothing more, and went back to looking ahead. Akashi tried rubbing the tired out of his eyes. How did he end up in this situation? He was just a normal person, trying to live a normal life. Why did he deserve this? What had he done to the universe to receive this sort of punishment? Putting aside the possibility that he had been cursed, he continued to make his way towards the modern building, still bitter over his rather rude awakening.

Keep reading

Some Thoughts and Theories on Teddy and his Relationship With Vincent (A.K.A: Why My VinLou Ship Should Win Dammit!)

So on my regular re-read of BFF, I’ve come to notice a few things about Teddy and Vincent’s relationship that I think bear mentioning. Right now, we are at the stage where we are all wondering whether Teddy is having what may be the most inconveniently timed epiphany in regards to his feelings for Vincent, but I would like to raise the possibility of Teddy confusing his feelings for love when they aren’t. I would like to consider the possibility that his feelings are closer to admiration or maybe even jealousy to some degree. And I don’t mean jealousy over Vincent’s love, but Vincent himself. Let me explain:

1. Teddy has body image issues. He is skinny and scrawny and no matter how many people tell him that it isn’t important or that he looks good, he still can’t take his shirt off in public. Vincent wasn’t very attractive either when they first became friends, and while everyone likes to applaud Vincent for staying friends with Teddy after he got hot, I would like to take a moment to think about it from Teddy’s side. He has this new best friend who, even though he was just as dorky, swooped in and beat up John and stopped his bullying. And then one day he went through this ugly duckling transformation and now suddenly this new friend he has is popular and attractive. He has this amazing body now, the kind that Teddy wishes he could have. Maybe not the kind Teddy wants to make love to, but the kind he wants for himself. I bring this up after seeing the little collage at the start of chapter 20. Yes, it’s Teddy thinking about Vincent’s body, but it is sandwiched between scenes of bullying, where Teddy was made to feel bad because of his own physical appearance. That doesn’t seem like a time when Teddy would be thinking about anything sexual. I personally read it a little more like envy. Like, here is Teddy’s body that he hates, but look there is Vincent with the ideal form. 

2. Teddy is definitely jealous of Vincent’s relationship with his father, probably because he feels like Vincent is the son his father always wanted. 

Now, Teddy’s parents like Vincent a lot. I mean, they even bought him a car! And they’re nice to him, basically providing the example of good parenting and a good married relationship that Vincent never got at home. Also things like this: 

At first, I assumed that Teddy would be happy that his parents like his best friend, and I’m sure he is. But he is also jealous of it. Like the time Dr. Bijapur wanted to offer to walk onto the field with Vincent during the last game of the season. Teddy was very adamantly against this, and not because it might be embarrassing or anything, but instead…

Now this doesn’t mean that there isn’t genuine affection there. The two of them are close, best friends, which leads me into my next point.

 3. Teddy is kind of clingy. And I’m basing that off of several factors. For starters, there is his friendship with John which came to an unfortunate end. The two of them were very close, BFF’s since they were babies. In fact, it was in the flashback to their friendship that I first saw the words “Best Friends Forever” actually used in the comic.

As the title of the entire comic, I can’t help but feel like this is important. The John and Teddy relationship has been set up to play a very important role in this story, much more important than I assumed John would be in the beginning, and I can’t help but suspect that that is because Teddy’s previous relationship with John is influencing his current relationship with Vincent. How? Well, John was Teddy’s original Best Friend Forever. With the death of his mother and his descent into douchebaggery however, that friendship came to a bitter end. Enter Vincent, Teddy’s new Best Friend Forever. Even without romantic feelings, Teddy values Vincent a lot and would hate to lose him. At the beginning of the comic, Vincent is really the only friend Teddy has, and even after he becomes friends with the cheerleaders Vincent is still the only friend he really opens up to. And Teddy is fiercely protective of that friendship. I mean, just remember the revenge he sought when the guys crashed Dude Night? 

If you remember, this resulted in the guys getting stood up for the dance. 

Teddy, who everyone believes is so sweet and nice and innocent, is not afraid to play dirty to protect his relationship with Vincent. It’s that important to him and I can’t help but feel like some of that is due to his own insecurities. Vincent is handsome and popular he has no reason to stay friends with Teddy, especially considering that Teddy has already had one best friend turn on him. 

But where am I going with this? Well, several places. For starters, Summer Break. Where Vincent almost kissed him. Teddy noticed. I know Teddy noticed because he told Penelope, and then later Vincent asked if they needed to talk about it. It is obviously a thing that they have both acknowledged. Vincent even said as much to Louis.

So, all agreed? Teddy has clearly acknowledged that what happened was a thing, but then continued to act as if it never happened. But he knows that it did, and Teddy isn’t stupid okay? There are only so many reasons to try and kiss somebody, so I’m pretty sure that he knows somewhere, maybe even just in the back of his mind that Vincent has feelings for him. And I can’t help but wonder if somewhere equally deep inside, he is relieved. Because if Vincent has feelings for him, he isn’t going to leave him. And I don’t think that Teddy is in love with him, but the way he acts sometimes… He has to know how that kind of behavior comes off. People have even confronted him about it and Penelope was concerned that he wasn’t being careful enough of Vincent’s feelings. And I would like to think better of Teddy, but he has been known to be a bit devious to get what he wants, and maybe it’s accidental. Maybe he doesn’t quite realize what he is doing. But I sometimes wonder if he acts the way he does, knowing Vincent’s feelings for him, to help ensure his place in Vincent’s life. because if Vincent is still in love with him, Vincent isn’t going to leave him or turn on him like John did. Hell, Teddy is even turning down Princeton to go to a less prestigious school with Vincent. Sure, he said that Princeton was too WASP-y, but his father brought up a good point: So is Victoria High. I don’t quite believe that argument. I more readily believe that Teddy is scared of being on his own, without Vincent. Of having to make new friends or maybe of growing apart from Vincent as people sometimes do when there is distance between them. Going away to college can be scary and I believe that Teddy is scared. Do I believe he is handling his fear in a healthy way? No, not at all. Neither does his dad, actually. 

No. I don’t really think that Teddy knows that. Regardless, I think that all of his fears and insecurities are only exacerbated by the fact that for the first time, things are changing… How? Well…

4. Teddy never had any problem with Vincent dating Kamri. In fact, he even encourages it at times. He likes Kamri and he likes her and Vincent together. But if you’ll notice, Kamri never came between the two of them. Hell, when the comic starts Vincent and Kamri are in bed together and he is still talking about Teddy. But then, Vincent and Kamri were never in a real relationship because Vincent has always been gay and in love with someone else. I don’t think Teddy has ever had to experience the adjustment period that comes with trying to balance a best friend with a relationship because Teddy has always come first, regardless. But now there is Louis in the picture. Louis who is male, and gay, and someone who Vincent could conceivably develop feelings for. Have an actual relationship. And even though Teddy is unaware of their secret fuckbuddy arrangement, he is still feeling the effects of it. Vincent is spending time with Louis that he would normally have reserved for Teddy, and the secrecy makes it all the worse because to Teddy he is suddenly lying and sneaking around and not being totally honest. Teddy doesn’t know what exactly is up, but he knows that it’s something and I imagine that his own personal insecurities make this especially worse.  

4. Then there are the things we’ve learned about Teddy through his relationship with Penelope. 

And this was over Penelope, a girl he was kind of dating just to date. To get experience or something. And I mean, he did like her. He wasn’t in love with her, but he did like her. I think he was a little put out that she didn’t want an actual, exclusive relationship with him though. So if we think about this as foreshadowing, there was Teddy and Penelope. And they liked each other. But Penelope had a boyfriend. And Teddy wasn’t necessarily jealous, but he was competitive and a bit possessive. And if you look at the Teddy/ Vincent/ Louis situation, I could honestly see it playing out in a similar way. I think that Teddy has gotten used to being first in Vincent’s life (Literally first. Vincent has a crap relationship with his parents, Teddy is actually the most important person to him) and has never had to share and I don’t think he wants to now. 

Now, these are just my theories based on my own personal observations. The observations of an avid VinLou shipper. Maybe I’m right. Maybe I’m wrong. Honestly, the comic has surprised me before. In the beginning I had assumed that it would be Teddy in love with Vincent, not the other way around. That part honestly surprised me. In the beginning I thought that Louis was a much smaller character and now he is part of my OTP. I thought that John was an insignificant jock character, just there to be kind of an asshole. I was wrong. One of the great yet frustrating things about this comic is that it isn’t usually predictable. 

I am sure that there are plenty of VinTed (TedVin? Vinddy?Tedcent? Bijafawkes? What even is the Vincent/Teddy ship name?) shippers with their own theories and I would honestly like to hear them. I think the biggest hole in this is the Teddy-boner scene from the ski chalet, and asking Louis about his sexuality. How he knew he was gay. Now teenage boys get boners all the time and Teddy may just be confusing his feelings towards Vincent, of not wanting to lose him, as something romantic. That’s the only real argument I have against those things and I admit, it’s incomplete. I will conclude, however, by saying that I do love Teddy. I know that someone of my opinions may sound as if I think he is a horrible character and I don’t. I don’t think that any of his actions, whether I am interpreting them correctly or not, are coming from a bad place. I think that he loves Vincent, and whether that is a romantic love or not, that he doesn’t want to lose him. But I do also agree with Louis in the latest chapter (23.4) Teddy is being a bit of a selfish asshole, so while I love the character I can’t say I’m fond of his behavior. 

I agree with Penelope when she said that Teddy needed to spend more time alone. 

She means you need to learn to be a little more independent Teddy. The codependency in their relationship is one of the main reasons why I no longer ship Vincent and Teddy together. 

Do you agree? Do you disagree? I love talking about this comic (And reading very long text-post theories and speculations. I hope you do too. If not….sorry not sorry) so please, share ALL the theories with me. I can take it!