There are three things Emma can’t stop thinking about:

1. Regina’s soulmate is dead and never coming back.

2. Zelena killed her own True Love to save her sister.

3. The expression on Snow’s face when she saw Dorothy and Red together.

It’s weird, because they’re not connected, not really. And of course she cares about Robin dying. She hurts because Regina’s hurting but she doesn’t think that’s really it either. She just wants to know what it all means. How can someone be your soulmate if they die and leave you all alone? What is True Love worth if it can betray you? And why the hell has she been hiding half her self from Snow all these years? What made her think Snow White of all people could be a homophobe - her mom who sees the best in everyone, even an Evil Queen.

And there’s another thing that’s linked to all of those, and not. Because she has True Love now, her and Killian, except the whole thing was a trap so what if the test was just a trick? And why does this idea fill her with something that feels a little like hope.

She’s so tangled up in it all - soulmates and True Love and kisses that change the world - and then one day she’s hunting for an old DVD she wants to show the kid, and it’s right at the back of a box she hasn’t looked in for years, the box full of stuff from her old life. That’s when it hits her - what her old life was. What her old world was and how much she seems to have forgotten it. And it’s not like she misses it, not really, but she thinks that in that world she might be able to clear her head at last.

So she makes some excuse. The kid and Regina don’t seem to buy it, but everyone else does, and she drives off to Boston and rents a room in a motel she used to stay in when she had some shady asshole to track down and didn’t want anything leading back to her apartment. And she goes to Old Sully’s, a dive bar she spent a lot of evenings in that she kidded herself weren’t lonely because the regulars all knew her name and would drunkenly slur it as she came in.

Some of those regulars are still at the bar, but they’ve long ago drunk away any memory of her. She orders her first shot and settles back to think. Except instead of thinking she finds herself watching this old couple squashed up next to each other in one of the shabby booths. They’ve got to be in their seventies but the way they look at each other, the smiles and the secret laughter… That’s love. And it occurs to her suddenly that if she went up and asked them if it was True Love and told them there was some kind of test that could let them know for sure, they’d laugh at her.

Three years ago she’d have laughed at herself: soulmates and true love and happily ever after. What bullshit. There’s a reason they only happen in stories. The real world’s messier and less certain and *better*. Her mom and dad, Snow and David, their love is real because it’s lasted, because they’ve worked at it and stuck with it. And her and Killian…

He’s a good guy. Well, for her he is anyway. And he’s a good friend. But what he sees when he looks at her isn’t what she sees when she looks at him. It isn’t what Snow and David see when they look at each other. It’s a dream, and it isn’t even hers.

Then she thinks about Henry, her other True Love, and what she feels so deep in the guts of her means more than any rainbow kiss. But thinking about Henry makes her think about Regina, it makes her think about Snow having no problem at all with her best friend loving another woman and how Emma wishes she’d known that from the start.

What she feels for Regina isn’t always pretty. There are no fairy tales written about a couple like them. But then fairy tales don’t belong in this century and she thinks that her and Regina might just be a story that does. It didn’t happen in one magical kiss, or with a test from the gods or in any clear single moment, except perhaps their very first when Regina opened the door to her and Henry and this whole thing began.

The thing is, she doesn’t need any test from the gods or magical rainbow to tell her what they are. *She* knows that it’s love, and that’s the only thing that really counts.


ICONS + Star Trek TOS #1

  • free to use anywhere
  • credit is greatly appreciated, but not required so long as you don’t claim them as your own
  • 300 x 300 for twitter & easy resizing

available at my icons page

limit two unique icons (with any number of variations) per request

Episode 117: The Sinister Bell’s Chime

-Yugo and Rin Duel!?-
Yugo and Rin have an emotional reunion. However, Rin then challenges Yugo to a Duel!! Yugo feels that something is off about Rin’s strategy, but…!?

-This week’s Reiji: Telling Yuya about his promise to Yusho!-
Reiji talks to Yuya about the promise he made three years ago. In order to stop Akaba Leo’s ambition, he asked for Yusho’s help, but…

I didn’t want to spoil the surprise, but I’m getting another custom Scarecrow plush made and this particular progress photo was just too special not to share.

The artist sent me this shot right before she cut his straw hair down to size. Just look at that mop head! He looks like he’s going through an emo phase~!
🎃 😂 🎃

You know what everyone needs? Particle plushies from! Not only are the designs for the particle absolutely adorable, each particle is stuffed according to how much the particle weighs which means, yes, the photon is as close to massless as it can get and dark matter is the heaviest plushie 

And! If you can’t decide between getting an up quark or a down quark, you can get a nucleon with quarks and gluons zipped inside! And if plushies aren’t your thing, they also have pins, sticks, magnets, more, and even a free ipad app! 

Basically if you love particles and particle physics, you’re going to love

Episode 117: The Sinister Bell’s Chime

Yugo and Rin Duel!?
Yugo and Rin have an emotional reunion. However, Rin then challenges Yugo to a Duel!! Yugo feels that something is off about Rin’s strategy, but…!?

This week’s Reiji: Telling Yuya about his promise to Yusho!
Reiji talks to Yuya about the promise he made three years ago. In order to stop Akaba Leo’s ambition, he asked for Yusho’s help, but…

Does anyone else have certain old memes that just kinda stick with them? For instance, I still kinda mentally refer to the internet as a series of tubes, and have to stop myself from saying shit like “MOAR,” “a winRAR is you,” or “sauce plox.”

I stg…. if people start getting nasty towards Tate bc of a reality tv show….

Tagged by the wonderful angels that are @darlingrick @aaronobsessive @inloveamateursatbest 

nickname: millie is technically my nickname - my full name is aemilia

gender: female

star sign: leo

height: 5′3″

hogwarts house: slytherin

favourite colour: blue

time right now: 18:36

average hours of sleep: anywhere between 4 and 10 hours

lucky number(s): 2, 14

last thing I googled: something for work but i can’t say what because it’s top secret

favourite fictional character: can’t choose just one so here’s a shortlist - robert sugden, donna noble, jake peralta, cassandra mortmain, sirius black, martha costello

blankets you sleep with: just my duvet

favourite bands/artists: right now it’s bon iver but it changes daily

what I’m wearing right now: black and white checked dress

when I made this blog: april 2016 (but my other blog detectivelestrade was made 5 years ago)

how many blogs I follow: 123

what do I post about: on this blog it’s just emmerdale, but on my other one it’s basically a mess of fandoms, politics and social justice issues

do I get asks on a daily basis: i do and they never fail to make me smile

why did you choose your url: because the sugden fam is my life and i adore each and every one of them and will defend them at all costs

i tag: @fangirlqueen87 @portinastorm @pavedwithhearts @hissing-miseries @mrsugden @justleavemebreathless

anonymous asked:

What ring did Tim give Téa?? I've never heard of it D: !!!! Is there a story on it online or something?

Tim designed a ring and gave it to Téa for her birthday this year. The ring made its first appearance in 2.20, where Elizabeth adopted the ring as her own after going through a jewelry box at the farm house. Téa/Elizabeth has been wearing it ever since. You can see the ring on her right ring finger :)

what lapis is:
-an abuse survivor who fought back after being completely helpless for thousands of years
-someone who made mistakes in fighting back
-someone with intense ptsd and long lasting trust issues that can cause lash outs
what lapis not:
-the abuser
-an inherently bad person for being a mentally ill abuse survivor

The Long and Short of It

My ex-husband and I have always had issues. They’re not mine to share, but they’ve been there. We continually slapped band aids on them but neither of us committed to fixing the issues. We bought things, went places, sunk ourselves in experiences and material goods instead of healing the ever growing rift in our marriage. This is something we both freely admit.

A year ago, I made the Decision. Things had to change in order for us to be sustainable. But nothing did, we continued to follow old, non-sustainable patterns. We failed. And so, early this year, as even more was exposed about who we were growing to be and how we were growing apart, we decided to split. Fifteen years gone and we knew it simply wasn’t doable anymore. So he moved into the guest house and we filed and separated and began dating other people.

I dated a bit and had fun, and then stopped after a couple months when it wasn’t fun anymore. My ex dated and still continues to. As the good friends we are, we discussed our dating lives and remained very friendly. A few months ago, I was contacted online by a local man, I’ll call him J. He was fascinated by my work and what I do and was interested in meeting with me. He owns a skateboard company and has a passion for helping struggling kids through skateboarding lessons. I blew it off for a bit and then decided to meet him for a last minute lunch.

And that was when everything changed. We had a three hour lunch and were astonished by our shared and mutual goals for making the world a better place by starting with kids. We discussed shared ideas and had so many a-ha moments. Synchronicity was everywhere. Frankly, I was terrified. Somehow I knew that this man and I were supposed to work together in the world, be partners in every way, and it was the last thing both of us wanted. He and I had carefully mapped out individual life plans, and they didn’t include relationships or love. As they say, life is what happens when you are busy making plans.

As these things often are, this new relationship was unexpected and knocked my feet out from underneath me. I know one thing, I’m meant to be in it and I’m meant to do my work in the world alongside this man. It’s been hard for a lot of people to understand. It looks batshit crazy from the outside. But inside, in my heart, it makes total sense. Like so many other things over the last six years, it is one more I am being called to do. One thing I am proud of about myself is I go where God calls me, even when the rest of the world rolls their eyes. I stand in my truth, come hell or high water, and I own both my successes and failures equally.

This is what matters. That I am doing what is right for ME, and that my kids are okay and doing well. They are. My kids are happy and adjusting and see the shine in my eyes. They get it (even though I know they have their moments of thinking I’m batshit crazy too). We laugh every day in our cozy new home and jokingly call this time in our lives the Bohemian Revolution (a name taken from my brilliant friend Cat- she called the period after her divorce the same thing). I’ve always been so open about my life, in hopes that others may learn from my choices, as well as my mistakes. Sometimes that opens me to more criticism than I’d like, but I think the benefits outweigh the hate mail. My hope is that others will find their own path and stick true to what they know they are called to do, despite the opinions of others. I’m using this time as a spiritual practice. To learn how to stand tall in my choices even while being pelted with rocks.

We are good. I am good. J is good, as his his seven-year-old son, who I adore and Sugar Biscuit loves to play with. My kid’s dad is good. The most important people in my life are all okay. My ex and my new partner honor, like and respect each other. I get to live and work alongside someone who shares the same gifts, talents, and passions, and  WE ARE ALL OKAY. J and I launched programs and are working on curriculum to bring healing to children and families who are underserved using skateboarding as the tool. My book is almost ready for market and my radio show is going really well, the plans to start my non-profit are coming together. My kids are excited for the coming school year. J’s skateboard company and private lesson business is going well, and my kid’s dad is headed to Peru for a three week trip and I am SO excited for him to have that experience.

There was a lot of gossip, drama, assumption and negativity around the blossoming of this new relationship. People said it was an affair, that I am a horrible/selfish/evil/hateful person. Honestly, it was really just a beautiful, overwhelming, joyfully terrifying collision of two people who have things to do together in this world and who listen to Spirit and are willing to free fall and jump, hand in hand, knowing they will be caught and all will be well because they are going exactly where they were told to go.

So, this is where we sit. My old life and my new life and all the threads that connect the two, woven mostly of my children. I had no intentions of being where I am, and certainly none of hurting anyone, least of all my kids or their father. I made the choice to end my marriage before I even knew J existed, not because of him. I am continuing to do my best to balance their needs and mine, and I will never ever stop doing that.

As for J and I, I am just incredibly grateful. I’ve been blessed by the people in my life, and he is no exception. He is a blessing, and I am shining with the smile of a thousand suns. I am sorry for the ways our being together might hurt people, but I am not sorry for what we are creating together, or what we have, because it is simply beautiful. And so, here we are, moving forward, co-creating, just a couple of people trying to make their way in this world and shine little light on the darkness.

no offense but why do people make these scribble poetries with mad simple sentences that look like a 5 year old made them and get that many notes. nothing that looks like this should get 73k

I’m having a little art block but not the bad kind of art block. like… I feel like I’m waiting for my system to load all the updates I’ve installed. 

I’ve learnt a lot of new shit this past year, made lots of progress, arted A LOT, and I’m… digesting all of this. 

and while I do I don’t really feel the need to be drawing, I’m just letting it all click into place. 

it’s kind of a really relaxing thing, to be aware I’m not under obligation to draw all the time and I can let myself have this down time to do other things and wait for the muse to come knocking back.

also because the few things I felt like drawing, came out looking way better than most of the shit I did in the past 12 months, so I’m pretty sure I’m not un-learning to draw


with Multiple Maniacs getting a re release I wanted to repost my review I made last year for my John Waters series. It’s really cool that one of Waters’ rarer films is getting a better and actual release. So now you can see Divine get raped by a giant lobster and all the other gross stuff that happens in this movie newly restored and looking better then ever. 

Also I really love the new poster. Never felt Multiple Maniacs got a proper poster til this release. So I updated the video image in honor of that. 

Multiple Maniacs Review

”It always seems impossible until it’s done.”

                                                                         -Nelson Mandela

Personal Development and Career Goals


I am already 16 years old and I think that I already have achieved things no matter how simple they are. Being a student in La Salle Academy for 11 years made me achieve a lot of things. First, I was able to mingle and socialize with others in school which I think is a great achievement. Second, through the 11 years, I was able to maintain good grades which made me achieve honors. Third, I was given the opportunity to be a part of the Student Council and having the experience to be the Treasurer is an achievement because I was able to learn new thing and gained experiences which I think is an achievement. Lastly, I was able to proceed to Grade 11 despite all the worries and tiresome tasks given to us.


I think that being a daughter, sister, and a friend are the responsibilities that I am playing daily. Being a daughter, it means that I should be responsible so that my parents can depend on me and also show respect to them since they are my parents. Being a sister, it implies that it is my responsibility to show good behavior to my sibling since setting myself as an example to them is a responsibility. Being a friend, it means that I should show respect to them since they are also humans.


It is my goal to become someone who would make a difference even if it is the tiniest action that I can do. I aspire to become a doctor(in God’s will) to help those who are in need of my service. Right now, my simple goal is to be genuinely happy.