To Anyone who Thinks They're Falling Behind in Life (and aren’t good/creative/ect. enough)
“You don’t need more motivation. You don’t need to be inspired to action. You don’t need to read any more lists and posts about how you’re not doing enough.
But, honestly, here’s the thing that nobody really talks about when it comes to success and motivation and willpower and goals and productivity and all those little buzzwords that have come into popularity: you are as you are until you’re not. You change when you want to change. You put your ideas into action in the timing that is best. That’s just how it happens.
And what I think we all need more than anything is this: permission to be wherever the fuck we are when we’re there.
You’re not a robot. You can’t just conjure up motivation when you don’t have it. Sometimes you’re going through something. Sometimes life has happened. Life! Remember life? Yeah, it teaches you things and sometimes makes you go the long way around for your biggest lessons.
You don’t get to control everything. You can wake up at 5 a.m. every day until you’re tired and broken, but if the words or the painting or the ideas don’t want to come to fruition, they won’t. You can show up every day to your best intentions, but if it’s not the time, it’s just not the fucking time. You need to give yourself permission to be a human being.
Sometimes the novel is not ready to be written because you haven’t met the inspiration for your main character yet. Sometimes you need two more years of life experience before you can make your masterpiece into something that will feel real and true and raw to other people. Sometimes you’re not falling in love because whatever you need to know about yourself is only knowable through solitude. Sometimes you haven’t met your next collaborator. Sometimes your sadness encircles you because, one day, it will be the opus upon which you build your life. We all know this: Our experience cannot always be manipulated. Yet, we don’t act as though we know this truth. We try so hard to manipulate and control our lives, to make creativity into a game to win, to shortcut success because others say they have, to process emotions and uncertainty as if these are linear journeys.
You don’t get to game the system of your life. You just don’t. You don’t get to control every outcome and aspect as a way to never give in to the uncertainty and unpredictability of something that’s beyond what you understand. It’s the basis of presence: to show up as you are in this moment and let that be enough. Yet, we don’t act in a way that supports this lifestyle. We fill every minute with productivity tools and read 30-point lists on how to better drive out natural, human impulse. We often forget that we are as we are until we’re not. We are the same until we’re changed. We can move that a bit further by putting into place healthy habits and to show up to our lives in a way that fosters growth, but we can’t game timing. Timing is the one thing that we often forget to surrender to.
Things are dark until they’re not. Most of our unhappiness stems from the belief that our lives should be different than they are. We believe we have control — and our self-loathing and self-hatred comes from this idea that we should be able to change our circumstances, that we should be richer or hotter or better or happier. While self-responsibility is empowering, it can often lead to this resentment and bitterness that none of us need to be holding within us. We have to put in our best efforts and then give ourselves permission to let whatever happens to happen—and to not feel so directly and vulnerably tied to outcomes. Opportunities often don’t show up in the way we think they will.
You don’t need more motivation or inspiration to create the life you want. You need less shame around the idea that you’re not doing your best. You need to stop listening to people who are in vastly different life circumstances and life stages than you tell you that you’re just not doing or being enough. You need to let timing do what it needs to do. You need to see lessons where you see barriers. You need to understand that what’s right now becomes inspiration later. You need to see that wherever you are now is what becomes your identity later.
Sometimes we’re not yet the people we need to be in order to contain the desires we have. Sometimes we have to let ourselves evolve into the place where we can allow what we want to transpire. Let’s just say that whatever you want, you want it enough. So much so that you’re making yourself miserable in order to achieve it. What about chilling out? Maybe your motivation isn’t the problem, but that you keep pushing a boulder up a mountain that only grows in size the more you push. There’s a magic beyond us that works in ways we can’t understand. We can’t game it. We can’t 10-point list it. We can’t control it. We have to just let it be, to take a fucking step back for a moment, stop beating ourselves up into oblivion, and to let the cogs turn as they will. One day, this moment will make sense. Trust that. Give yourself permission to trust that.”
Thomas I hope you're okay with all the current drama, I personally believe that you did nothing wrong at all. You're always making sure you're inclusive and doing the right thing, sorry your fandom's exploded :(
Hey!! Yeah, I’m doing fine!! Please don’t worry, these sorts of things happen sometimes and it gets very hard to address and handle all at once! I have made mistakes though, so please don’t feel like you have to defend all that I do, that’s not your responsibility, and I’ve been doing what I can to make sure things were addressed!
There was a piece of art of myself that was posted a while back that I put under a Read More and tagged nsfw because it was, and it was revealed later, after the artists’ bio was updated, that they were not of appropriate age, and that was a complete mistake on my part to make sure! I’ve always made a point to clarify, if people asked me, that if they were to do any nsfw art of me and submit it, that they should be of appropriate age to be doing so. My tumblr started as a personal blog and I thought tagging things appropriately would be enough, but this occurrence absolutely made me rethink how my blog was laid out and how much more consideration I needed to be putting into my blog and who was viewing it, so I made a public apology for it yesterday (in the #TSask) and decided to restructure my blog in order to make sure this never happens again. Posts I deemed too questionable, I have removed and if they ever go up again, they would be going up on a sideblog of some kind. I absolutely appreciate those who brought this up to me. I should have been the one to catch it, and I need to be far more vigilant about what I post from here on out!
There was also the post I responded to about why I felt it right to include asexuals and aromantics of any combination in the community. I’ve been having many really awesome and respectful conversations with people on both sides of this argument and its been really good, for me and I think for a lot of them, to gain understanding on where we’re both coming from. I am so grateful to those who came to me and got to discuss with me incredibly important things to remember and respect: the early struggles of the trans and gay community, the Stonewall Riots, the travesties and systemic oppression that still happen around the world today that need to be fought. We also got to discuss issues like arranged marriages that affect people on all areas of the spectrum. We talked about different demographics of the community and where they would like to stand or not stand. And the importance of limited resources made available to people of the community were discussed with me as well. I’ve been so absolutely grateful to those of you who came to me and are still coming to me to talk through these things, because I don’t claim to know everything, and many of the discussions were ended wonderfully respectfully. In the end, obviously, I have no, or maybe just really little, say in what defines the community. In what I say, I am absolutely making no attempt to prioritize people over another, because there are some extreme things that need to be fought. I can only be in control of myself and who I deem to be valid and who I would like to offer my support. I truly am trying to put myself in everyone’s shoes and see where they’re coming from. And I am so grateful so many of you came to me so respectfully to talk! That’s amazing! That, I think, is the most optimal form of discussion for people on both sides. I don’t like seeing anyone on either side attacking each other, and it’s so devastating to see so much of it.
I truly hope this helps bring clarity for those of you who were confused or looking for an update! The internet can be a confusing place and the truth can be mangled, but I am doing everything I can to make sure I amend for any bad decisions and hear you all out as best as I can. I’m only human, and I truly do care about you and where you’re all coming from, so I hope you can all bear with me!
I will never understand the idea of “if you love something set it free” and the sentiment of “if its meant to be it will happen” like yeah, sometimes things work out and thats serendipity and thats great but usually if you have something that you love or you care about, you cant just give it up and hope it comes back. If you have something or someone that lights a passion in your heart and soul, you gotta fight for it because you’re lucky that you’ve found such a thing in this world
the thing with history i find is there is somethings we will never know the answer to, no matter how hard we look and how hard we want to find that, and at some point that has to be accepted? you can put out a very through meticulously researched paper and sometimes what you get is “yeah maybe, maybe it happened that way, maybe not” and you have to be okay with that because it’s just the truth
Q: What can we expect from the new series of
Cillian: I can’t really tell you anything without giving the whole thing away. But you sort of see them
rewind and go back to their roots, away from the
material gain of the last season.
Q: There’s hype
your job – fame,
You’re not a fan
of that, are you? CM: I hate that other
side which has
nothing to do
with me and that won’t ever
attention is never
I have to contend
with. I’m left to
my own devices
for the most part.
Q: But it happens… CM: Yeah, of course it does. And sometimes I get a
good laugh out of it. I was in a chipper in Galway
– keeping to myself, getting my cod and chips –
and I could see this elderly lady looking at me.
You just know when they’re going to come over,
it’s the moment of bracing yourself. And on cue
she says: ‘Are you Cillian Murphy?’ And I say:
‘Yes, I am.’ And she goes: ‘Your eyes – you know
what? They’re not even that blue!’
Q: You moved back to Ireland recently. How has
the transition been from London?
Really great. We’ve been back a while now and
feel pretty settled… We
thought, our kids are growing up, do we want
them to be London teenagers or Irish teenagers?
We both grew up Irish teenagers ourselves;
there’s something very sacred about that and
that was a big decision-maker for us.
Q: You started out as a musician back in the day,
do you ever think you might revisit that?
CM: No, I have very limited talents as a musician and
I haven’t got any better. I knew I was never going
to be good enough to reach the heights I wanted.
No, I’ll stick to the day job. Music is a hobby.
Summary – Children
can be so cruel; can Dean make it all better?
Word Count –
Warnings – Is Daddy!Dean a warning? I think Daddy!Dean should be a warning…
A/N –Request by @youtubehelpsmesurvive:
“First of all, I’m a really big fan of your writing!! I was wondering if you could
do a Dean x reader story based off either the song Wanted…by Hunter Hayes. AND I had two requests for a
Daddy!Winchester story, so I’m going to combine them both in this one.
Dean truly loved the life he had now, but he was about to
pull his hair out in frustration. You
were away visiting relatives out of state, and he was left as the sole
caretaker of your six-year-old daughter for the week. He was at a loss to figure out how to do the
fishtail braid that the little girl was demanding he put into her hair.
I need more half Filipino yams and I haven’t seen a lot of it then someone mentioned it on @tsukkiyamaheadcanons and I just needed to do this
- Yams’ mom is Filipino and his dad is Japanese
- When Yama speaks Filipino he sounds really different from when he speaks Japanese. He’s more expressive, and to some extent, kind of agressive? He’s more comfortable cursing but the cursing is so abundant (I’m very much like this. You know that thing in stories and bilingual characters suddenly switch languages in a conversation like its something they can’t control? Total bullshit. I forget that I’m bilingual, too, because I’m around people who also speak both English and Filipino but yeah. That doesn’t happen)
- Sometimes it’s just easier to speak in Filipino to express how pissed off he is
- “Putangina — wag ka nga, nakakaasar…ay, gago, ano bang klaseng buhay to, umayos ka nga, punyeta…” He learned those from his mom who thought he couldn’t hear her with the door closed
- Tsukki can’t understand what he’s saying but from the way Yama spits out the words he’s definitely cursing
- Yama does the thing when you hold the back of your parents’ hand and touch it to your forehead when they come home; you also do it with your grandparents or aunts and uncles, or friends of your parents. It’s called mano, and sometimes you say “mano po” or “bless” when you do it
- I’m just wondering if Yams was baptized Catholic and raised Catholic or?? Maybe Muslim. The possible religions his mother could be,
- Super biased but his mom is from Mindoro
- (It’s where I’m from)
- He’s never really visited his relatives from his mother’s side, but they’ve spoken over the phone and he’s seen pictures and heard stories from his mom
- I hc that Tsukki is one of those ppl that very casually joke about wanting to die and I imagine yams is the same its just that he says them in Tagalog under his breath: “Lord kunin niyo na po ako,” “Ayaw ko nang mabuhay,” “Patulugin niyo na ako habang buhay please,” he learned those from nihilistic Internet friends from the Philippines
- (Do some of you who understand relate or are laughing rn??)
- He’s probs hummin or singing some angsty love songs (he be singin some Ang Huling El Bimbo by Eraserheads and I’m weeping don’t look at me)
- He sings Ang Huling El Bimbo while he’s walking home with Tsukki who doesn’t understand but likes to listen because Yams has a nice voice and Yams just starts crying and he’s like “What’s wrong??” And Yams just wipes his tears and reaches out for Tsukki’s hand and he’s like, “Nothing, I just want to hold your hand,”
- (If you know the song this is AAAAAAAAAAAH)
- Please also consider: Tadhana by Up Dharma Down, Kailan by Yeng Constantino, and Migraine by Moonstar88
- He sings a lot at home with his mom, and sometimes his dad; someone just breaks into song and the other starts joining in and they belt out the end even if they can’t reach the high notes (I’m just speaking from experience; there is even a karaoke machine at my grandma’s house
- He loves?? Talking shit when no one can understand him?? It’s Marvelous,
- It’s funny when no one can understand him but it’s also very lonely
- Saying “I don’t care” sounds better for me when I say it in Tagalog; “wala akong pakialam.”
I’ve had Soft Kitty stuck in my head all day, thanks to this prompt. ;)
This one is for BullySquadess, in tribute to her story The
Ladybugs and the Bees. It is hilariously awesome, and if you haven’t
read it, you’re missing out!!
Chat Noir landed lightly on Marinette’s balcony and peered in through
her open trap door, frowning in disappointment when he didn’t see her.
There was a pile of blankets on her usually tidy bed, but the rest of
the room was empty. “Princess?” The pile of blankets on the bed below
him moved, to reveal a tousled head of blue-black hair and he jumped in
“Chat?” Marinette blinked owlishly at him, and then gestured for him to come in. “What are you doing here so early?”
uh…” He let himself down through the trap door, and tried to think
fast. He was there because she’d gone home from school early, and he
was so anxious to check on her that he hadn’t wanted to wait until dark
to come for a visit, but he couldn’t tell her that.
mind.” Her arm snaked out of the blanket mound to tug on his arm, and
he allowed her to pull him down beside her. “So long as you’re here,
you can come snuggle with me.” She threw the blankets over him and then
tucked herself in against him, with her back to his front.
propped his head in his head, and surveyed their position in
bemusement. “Well, this is…new.” She stiffened, and he mentally kicked
himself for saying the wrong thing. He rushed to continue. “Not that I
mind, in the least. I just wasn’t expecting it. Are you—I mean, is
“Um, I’m just not…feeling like myself,” she
replied, and he could see a blush spread over her cheeks. “You know,
um, lady things?”
“Lady th—oh! OH!” He felt a blush heat his own face. “Is there, er, anything I can do? To uh, help?”
“N-not really. Just cuddle, and keep me company? I mean, if you don’t mind staying for a while?”
smiled and tucked a pillow under his head, so that he could relax. “I
can’t think of anything I’d rather be doing, Princess.”
discovered two things when she woke, sometime later that evening.
First, that she and Chat had shifted in their sleep, so that she was
laying on her back, with his body pressed against the length of hers,
his face nuzzled into her neck, and his warm hand resting low on her
belly; and second, that he was purring. It was a low rumbling sound that she could feel as well as hear, and she smiled wonderingly. Chat Noir purred!
She touched his chest experimentally, and giggled to feel the vibrations in her fingertips.
“Ngh.” The purrs stopped, and Chat pushed himself up in confusion. “Wha—Marinette?”
She giggled again. “We fell asleep.”
“Oh. Right.” He rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. “Are you feeling better?”
“I—yes!” Marinette realized with some surprise that she actually was
feeling better. She’d had menstrual cramps bad enough to send her home
from school, and as usual, nothing she took could touch them.
Normally, she was lucky if they lasted only a day or two. She looked
thoughtfully at Chat. “Did you know that you purr?”
He blushed, and his black cat ears drooped. “Yeah, that happens sometimes. Is that weird?”
laughed. “No more weird than the fact that you run around dressed as a
black cat,” she replied, flicking the bell at his neck. “I like it.
And I-I think your purring might be why I’m feeling better.”
“Really?” His ears rose hopefully. "Can we keep snuggling, then?“
Marinette nodded, and he curled around her once more, purring happily.
Not my best work, ever.
For whatever reason, I had a really hard time with this, and I’m not
entirely pleased with the results. But I read recently that cats purr
at a frequency that encourages healing, and I wanted to use that
somehow. I’m tempted to go back and mess with it some more, but–nah.
(I need to go to bed and technically, I should have had this posted at least 30
minutes ago.) Thoughts??
Summary: The reader and Chris have been friends for a long time. Chris gets invited on a triple date for Valentine’s Day and without wanting to be a third wheel, he tries to convince the reader to come with him even though she hates the holiday.
Author’s Note: I wanna thank @mrs-squirrel-chester for being an awesome beta. I am absolutely the worst person ever! I meant to put this out last week (i.e. Valentine’s Day) but due to writer’s block I wasn’t able to do so. Call me Jean-Ralphio cause I’m
Warnings: None just tons and tons of Fluff… Oh and Chris being a total meatball (Should that be a warning?)
You heard your phone go off in your purse as you opened the trunk to your car. Setting it inside your trunk, you dug through your purse, finally pulling out your phone and saw Chris’ name flash on your screen.
“Hey Chris.” You answered, holding your phone between your ear and shoulder, grabbing your gym bag.
“Y/N!” He shouted. “I’ve called you three times already! What were you doing?” He sounded urgent.
“I was driving Christopher.” You deadpanned, swinging your gym bag over your other shoulder and slammed trunk shut. “Everything okay?” You asked.
“Everything’s fine.” He answered, “Are you home?”
“Yes Chris I just got home why?” You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion.
“Oh good, cause I’m inside waiting for you.” He said.
“What?” You looked up and saw Chris at your window and waving at you with a huge grin on his face.
“Motherfu-” You quickly hang up and jog over to your front door.
Summary: You blame Jaehyun for making your life at school hell. But when he offers a deal that’s just too good to pass, who knows how your opinion of him might change? Idol: Jaehyun of NCT Words: 2653 (ohmygod) Warnings: Language and rumors
You were basically selling your soul to the devil. Making this deal with Jung Jaehyun was definitely a mistake. Yeah, you knew that perfectly well, and, yet, your hand still confidently signs the piece of paper in front of you as your mind screams for it to stop.
You set the pen down and slide the contract towards Jaehyun, which he accepts with a smile.
“It’s a pleasure to do business with you. The terms of the contract take action tomorrow,” he says, folding the document and placing it in the inner pocket of his jacket. He gives another sickeningly sweet smile and walks out of the empty classroom, leaving you to your thoughts.