yeah i know i actually have friends

i wonder if root was ever as iconic as john was among new yorkers like we know john was “the man in the suit” but was root ever “that one chick who is everyone” like was there a forum for people trying to figure out what the hell she actually did for a living or how she could possibly do all the jobs she’s been seen doing did people just have casual conversation like yeah that one brunette who was our barista last week was my yoga instructor this week and their friend will be like oh cool i just saw her as an italian chef i hope she’s living her dreams

Today, I fucked up... when I made my Uber driver have an existential crisis

This happen to me about an hour ago. My car broke down and had to call Uber for a ride across town to work (which is about 40 minutes away). I work for a pretty big company and when he saw the address the conversation started. (For my privacy and the privacy of others, I’m going to change the name of my job and the people I’m speaking of.)

UD: “Hey man, you work JOB? How do you like it?”

Me: “It is pretty good. Pay is great, people are nice…can’t really complain.”

UD: “Bruh that is really good man. Gotta work hard these days, don’t know if you’ll have another chance, you know?”

Me: “Yeah man. I get you.”

UD: “I actually got a friend that works up there. He use to make websites all the time and he was excited when you guys hired him.”

Me: “I’m glad to hear that. What is his name?”

UD: “My boy Frank.”

Me: “Frank…Gallagher?”

UD: “Hell yeah, he is super smart and had a streak of bad luck with jobs. Then he got hired there and we knew he was set.”

Me: “Um..When was the last time you talked to him?”

UD: “Its been about 2-ish years. Me and my girl had a kid and lost contact with a few people but now that you reminded me of him, I’m going to hit him up soon.”

Me: “I don’t know if that is possible, Frank died like 2 years ago.”

UD: “…..What? Nah man. We must be talking about two different people.”

Me: “I’ve been working there for a while and we have had only one Frank Gallagher to work for us. He died in the summer of 2014 I believe.”

UD: “No, he didn’t. I’m going to call him right now because I’m pretty sure we are talking about two different people bruh.”

calls Frank on his phone and the number is disconnected

UD: “He probably didn’t pay his bill. You know how us black people are with our bills and shit. Hahaha”

Me: “Ummm…I trained him when he was hired. I’m sorry you found out this way but he was the only one.”

UD: “He wasn’t some young dude. He is about my age, like 40…”

Me: “or early 50’s? Black, slender, short with salt and pepper hair. Chipped tooth? Yeah, Frank. I know him because I really like him. Worked harder than any other young guy I’ve ever trained. He died, man. I’m really sorry you found out like this.”

Uber Driver starts to cry and pulls over

UD: “I….what…we were around the same age. What the fuck?!”

Me: “I’m sorry…I don’t know what to say” looks at the clock on my phone

UD: “He is way to young to die man. We are both in our 40’s bruh.*

He eventually collected himself and kept driving. Still got to work on time. I took a picture of Frank that I had on my desk and sent it to him, so he could realize we are talking about the same person.

TL;DR I, a stranger, informed a friendly Uber driver that one of his friends died and we shared a very emotional car ride together.


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annie-pie replied to your post “I have never, not once, had a parent friend say that becoming a parent…”

I think I must have blocked this out - did he actually say that?

“Congratulations on that. Has that changed your writing? Having a son”

“No, I don’t think it’s changed me writing too much. Writing in particular, I don’t find, I’m not really, you know it’s not as if I’m writing songs about me son. I mean, I love him obviously, but um, yeah I don’t know. I don’t think it’s affected, I mean it’s affected how I am as a person a little bit”

“What has it done?”

“I mean, I’d like to say it’s made me a bit more mature. I don’t know if that’s actually true.”

Loving with a Little Twist by hrrytomlinson


“What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know Niall! I just promised my mother I’m bringing my boyfriend - a boyfriend I don’t have - to Thanksgiving dinner. What should I do? I can’t call back and be like, ‘Oh yeah mom, that boyfriend I said that I have, I don’t actually have. Sorry to disappoint you.’ My life is ruined.” Harry returns to suffocating himself with the pillow.

Niall laughs and Harry growls at his best friend’s unwarranted happiness in this life-ending situation. Harry is fucked. Fuck. He needs a boyfriend. Fuck.

Harry/Louis Thanksgiving themed fake/pretend relationship // word count: 29k


Felicity was the perfect companion for an experience like this. The size of this film is very new for me and I had the perfect friend and confidante to talk about all the fears and things that you have to go through and overcome, you know?
                                                                    ✫ ✫ ✫ ✫ ✫ ✫
I’d seen Diego in Y Tu Mama Tambien, which I had been a big fan of when I was growing up. I just thought it was the coolest film ever. It was excellent working with him. He and Jyn in the story have a very lovely dynamic, and he’s very open, very collaborative and easygoing, and loves drinking espressos in true Spanish style…

Molly tries casual dating during season four
  • *end of a rather nice dinner date*
  • Guy: I'd like to do this again some time.
  • Molly: *smiling* Yeah, me, too.
  • Guy: How about a film this weekend?
  • Molly: Oh no, sorry, I have Rosie this weekend.
  • Guy: You have a child?!!
  • Molly: Goddaughter.
  • Guy: Oh that's nice. Are you very close?
  • Molly: Yes... erm, I'm helping her father out a bit... you know... his wife... my friend, she died... recently.
  • Guy: Oh God, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to upset you... Cancer?
  • Molly: Err yeah no, she was actually... shot.
  • *guy stares open mouthed*
  • Molly: That's kind of a ... long story. what if I tell you on our next date? *hopeful*
  • Guy: O-Ok.
  • *awkward pause*
  • Guy: Ok good. What about next Thursday?
  • Molly: Yes! Wait, no. Damn, I have Sherlock duty next Thursday.
  • Guy: Sherlock duty?
  • Molly: I'm helping... a friend.
  • *doesn't mention that she incidentally still loves said friend*
  • Molly: He had a bit of an... addiction problem. It's actually not that different from the babysitting. I just watch him so he can't take anything or cook up anything weird in his lab, you know?
  • *guy stares even more open mouthed*
  • Molly: Ok, you know what? Jonathan, it was nice to meet you. I hope you have a good life.

hiiii, here are a bunch of fics I’ve enjoyed and loved reading throughout the month of november. I recommend that you read these great fics in december, if you haven’t already!! there’s GREAT fics in here… some really seasonal stuff and even MY OWN FIC! please check them out!!

(all fics with a star are my favorites and if there are two stars then it was a favorite favorite)

1. Loving with a Little Twist (29k)**

“What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know Niall! I just promised my mother I’m bringing my boyfriend - a boyfriend I don’t have - to Thanksgiving dinner. What should I do? I can’t call back and be like, ‘Oh yeah mom, that boyfriend I said that I have, I don’t actually have. Sorry to disappoint you.’ My life is ruined.” Harry returns to suffocating himself with the pillow.

Niall laughs and Harry growls at his best friend’s unwarranted happiness in this life-ending situation. Harry is fucked. Fuck. He needs a boyfriend. Fuck.

(a thanksgiving fake/pretend relationship au, written by me!!)

2. When the Stars Come Out (30k)*

Louis was about to reassure Harry further when Gemma bounded back over to him, slipping a hand around Louis’ waist. Harry’s eyes followed the movement. And then that lip gnaw again. Christ. How was he supposed to survive this weekend?

He turned his attention to Gemma as her palm came to rest right above his heart. Laying it on a bit thick, dear. Or at least that’s what he hoped he’d conveyed with the simple tilt of an eyebrow.

In response, she went up on tiptoes and laid a noisy kiss on the hollow beneath his cheekbone. Louis didn’t take his eyes off Harry, who watched the scene play out with a blank expression. Once Gemma dropped back to the ground, Harry shifted away from them, his gaze dropping to his feet.

[Or the one where Louis pretends to be Gemma’s boyfriend for her horrid cousin’s wedding but fate is a nasty jerk and throws Harry in his way.]

3. Both Showing Hearts (113k)**

Louis Tomlinson is, in fact, not straight.

Harry Styles isn’t sure what he is.

Together, they figure it out, and maybe fall in love along the way.

Or, the Uni AU where Louis helps Harry figure out his sexuality, Niall crashes a bachelorette party, Liam works in a printing centre, and Zayn happens to need lots of printing done.

Keep reading

She’s No Angel

Originally posted by trashwilldo

A/n: Hi, I’m back. I tried something different.I don’t know how to explain it but Matt, a merely radar technician, seems to enjoy bullying and pushing the much-beloved reader to the edge. (I also apologize for the errors) Also, I changed some of the things but yeah, I hope you enjoy!

Part 2

“Did you hear about the new guy?” Lucky said. You shook your head. He knew that you would never know about these people with the hours you work. You were lucky to actually have friends at all, even if there were mostly troopers because of Lucky. They continued walking down the hall as he filled you in about some guy named Matt. With a sudden halt, you snapped out of it, with Lucky’s blaster stopping you.“There he is.” He cocked his helmet. You saw a rather large blonde man folded up on the floor trying to rewire a calcinator. You could obviously tell he was confused and didn’t know what he was doing. “Angel, watch this.” Lucky puffed his chest out. Instantly, you grabbed his arm. “Lucky, no! Stop!” He turned to look at you, even with the helmet on, you knew a smirk was plastered on his face. Lucky was definitely one the most sociable and admirable by many of his peers. Ranking top 5 in his class and working directly under Phasma, Lucky carried himself with a certain authoritative stride. Being lost in your thoughts, it was too late to stop his bullying. “Whaddup Matt?” Lucky said as he kicked a wrench away from Matt. Oh, and if looks can kill. Quickly and quietly, you made my way to retrieve the wrench. Even though you didn’t see him, you could feel his eyes watch my every move. “I-I’m sorry. I apologize on behalf of him.” you stuttered. His brown orbs seemed to peer into my soul. “Here you go.” You handed him the wrench. Soon a throbbing sensation was felt in your head. He just kept staring and never taking the wrench. ‘Ok take the wrench please, my legs are aching and this weird look is scaring me.’ He quickly snatched the wrench out your hand and glared. Rude. You stood up brushing your uniform off and walked down the hall. “Urgh!” You tripped in the vacant hallway, turning around to see if there were others. Only to see Matt smirking. He was an odd one.

Keep reading

And Now: A Conversation that Likely Happened in the Disney Universe
  • Moana: Yeah... The ocean is a friend of mine. It's pretty great, actually: having a friend like that.
  • Anna: I know, right? Disney Princesses always have the best connections with things: animals, nature, animated furniture...
  • Moana: Oh, I'm not a princess. I'm the daughter of a chief. There's a difference.
  • Anna: Oh, sorry! But don't worry. People still call Elsa a Princess all the time even though she's actually a Queen.
  • Moana: Oh! You're a Queen?
  • Elsa: Yeah. Our parents died in a shipwreck.
  • Moana: ... Oh.

yo! small reminder that, i have a RedBubble shop were some of my art is available on various merch (above are a few examples). Feel free to check it out, buy something for yourself/a friend!

Any support towards my merch, wether it’s just reading this, spreading this message around or actually buying something, means the world to me…so…yeah…THANK YOU!! u r gr8 and i hope you’re doing good <3

feel free to let me know what other designs you wanna see in my shop too and i’ll see what i can whip up~

I also do commissions!

Headcannon: Lena and Maggie know each other through a mutual ex or friend. (Because the LGBT community is actually that small)

M: Didn’t I meet you at Diana’s birthday party last year?
L: Oh, yeah! I went because she was friends with the woman I was seeing.
M: Wait, you were there with Anna?
L: Yes.
M: I didn’t know she was seeing anyone.
L: Oh, we’re not still together.
M: That’s good. I dated her a few years ago and I can tell you, you definitely dodged a bullet there.
L: I’m going to have to hear more about that, detective…

What not to say to a K-Pop fan...
  • Friend: heyyyy we should hang out this weekend
  • Me: yess that would be awesomee
  • Friend: yeah, we can have a nice 'K-Pop free' weekend~!
  • Me:
  • Friend:
  • Me:
  • Friend:
  • Me:
  • Friend:
  • Me: I'm actually busy oops
  • ---
  • Friend: omg yes K-Pop is so cool
  • Me: REALLY!?
  • Friend: yess I love Psy
  • Me: ...and?
  • Friend: and? I only know Psy
  • Me:
  • Friend:
  • Me:
  • Friend:
  • Me:
  • Friend: what?
  • Me: no
  • ---
  • Friend: oh what are you listening to?
  • Me: k-pop
  • Friend: K-Pop?
  • Me: yeh
  • Friend: what, is that Chinese?
  • Me:
  • Friend:
  • Me:
  • Friend:
  • Me:
  • Friend:
  • Me: Yes. The 'K' stands for Chinese
  • ---
  • Friend: can you plz play some music
  • Me: yyyeeeesssss
  • Friend: but it can't be Korean
  • Me:
  • Friend:
  • Me:
  • Friend:
  • Me: too bad it's gonna be Korean
  • ---
  • -Admin Jinnie

Dang, the Septiplier fandom really done did it.

I’ve seen a lot of good rants on this topic, and how we should be more respectful towards Mark and Jack. I’m just gonna add a little bit of mine into the mix.

Like, do not EVER force real life people into a relationship just to satisfy your own fantasy. That is gross and immature and can lead towards broken friendship and verbal harassments to actual couples. Which is wrong.

I’m not saying that you guys should stop shipping, but I want to say that you should tone the fuck down. Instead, picture this:

You can ship Markiplier with Jacksepticeye, sure.

You cannot force Mark Fischbach with Sean McLoughlin into a relationship. They’re actual people with lives outside of YouTube. They have families and friends and lovers. You cannot harass them. You cannot force them without their consent. You cannot push them so far that they cannot even bear to interact with each other. That is disgusting.

But yeah, go ahead and ship it. You just have to know that there are boundaries. You’re not a matchmaker or whatever, and I know you know you’re old enough to realize these kinds of things are not okay. 

Just grow up and respect these boundaries. Be a good shipper. 

“HaHA Lolz I has ADHD XDXDXD!!!”

Yeah I know it’s so hilarious when:

  • I cry over the fact I can’t finish my homework
  • I have the crippling fear I’m annoying my friends
  • People deny the fact that it’s an actual mental disorder
  • I’m forced into study halls where I can’t focus
  • I procrastinate literally everything and the weight of it crushes me
  • People claim “It’s made up to sell drugs”

yeah lol adhd is so much fucking fun

13. Imagine spending Christmas in Hogwarts with your best friend Newt

Originally posted by hardyness

“It’s for you” your shy friend Newt gave you a small package wrapped in yellow paper

“Did you make it?” you tried on clumsily made scarf with embroidered nifflers

“Yeah. This year we decided to made gifts by ourselves. Remember?” he smiled while his eyes wandered beyond you

“I know. I really like this creatures. Nifflers, right?. And I’m sorry, but my gift isn’t hand maded. I just couldn’t help myself.” your eyes shined as you took out little box from your pocket. It was full of little holes.

Newt slowly opened box. Inside it were little tree and a sleeping young Bowtruckles

“You know that it’s illegal. How did you get them?”

“Oh Newt. You know that I have my ways” you blinked and your friend hugged you tight

Originally posted by mitten

*not my gifs*

“Homestuck is bad because it actually turned my friend into a maniac who won’t rest until everybody loves Vriska and agrees with everything she says” - anon

some girl in 7th grade: omg you never told me who your crush is!!!

7th grade me: yeah bc i dont have one

girl: no but you have to! everyone likes a boy so you have to, too!

me: oh rlly? uhh ok *sweating* mmmm idk maybe i guess i kinda like that one boy i barely ever talk to and who is so out of reach that i don’t ever have to be confronted by him

the one time i tried to confess to a friend that i had obsessive-compulsive disorder, they said, “no you don’t, your room is way too messy, haha”

a human being literally said that to me

I don’t know why I get so upset when my parents talk about me meeting a guy and having a boyfriend. Actually its probably because I have commitment issues. Yeah I just can’t imagine myself settling down with a guy for the rest of my life. Oh my best friend? Yeah I’ll be with her forever. We’ll be best friends, who knows maybe we’ll even live with each other. But as friends. You know because we both have commitment issues and can’t marry guys? Think of how cheap the rent will be if we split it. And she can help me with cooking and cleaning and we’’ll tell each other about our days. We’ll be totally straight together. Just gals being pals. Nothing gay here.