Friendly reminder that Coach Lucia Tereschenko died on a train that was carrying crates of precious cargo, and now haunts the Little League baseball diamond (Episode 84: Past Time).
Reminder that Lucia saw the Planet Lit By No Sun as she was dying on top of the train carriage after there was an attempt at stealing the crates. The planet has already been linked to the crates in Episode 13: A Story About You.
Another reminder that a train arrived at the Little League baseball diamond, and the deer-masked beings (established in Episode 29: Subway as having something to do with trains) were very intent on getting their crates back complete with their minature buildings (Episode 91: The 12:37).
Reminder that The Destroyer (aka Huntokar) is the god of the tiny city beneath Desert Flower Bowling Alley and Arcade Fun Complex. The buildings may very well belong to said civilisation.
Very friendly reminder that Huntokar, according to Simone Rigadeau, destroyed the world in 1983 (Episode 103: Ash Beach).
So, how exactly does a harbinger of the apocalypse end up becoming involved in protecting a tiny city? What is the Planet Lit By No Sun, and what does it have to do with anything? How does this all tie into the events of Deft Bowman, and will it finally answer why time is so dang weird?
Me amigos, ‘tis be ye cap'n @promptguy. Thank ye fer all th’ submissions. I translated some to be more scurvy pirate. 'tis might be th’ best list so far.
“Which lovely booty ye be eyein’? th’ curvy wench’s or th’ shit-barnacles ye can’t spy wit’ ye eye in yon chest?”
“oh me god! th’ boat be leakin’!” “No, that’s just bilge rum”
Scribe 'bout a scurvy pirate that be scared 'o th’ ocean
Ye discover that Prompt Guy be actually th’ Flyin’ Dutchman
A pirate ship encounters sirens who use their song to lure them. th’ band 'o pirates give a go’ to escape but 'tis later revealed that th’ sirens don’t want sink them but join them
'tis ye first day on ship, 'n ye’re in learnin’. All th’ other members on board be experienced 'n professionals at their ship except 1. That one be ye “trainin’ laddie”… a child Jack Sparrow.
“walk thee fuckin plank ye scallywag”
Ye be th’ cap'n 'o a crew 'o Githyanki band 'o pirates, 'n ye be huntin’ ye quarry in th’ astral plane. th’ problem be, ye quarry consists 'o a ship full 'o illithids, or mind-flayers, who had previously enslaved ye kind wit’ their mental powers
Ye got captured by band 'o pirates. be tellin’ a story on how ye end up becomin’ cap'n fer that scurvy pirate ship. Bonus points if ye scribe a way ye do it that dont murder anyone nor end up wit’ physical harm.
Bin got a pair words fer ye scurvy dogs: “Shark Bait.”
Poseidon, th’ God 'o th’ Sea, has chosen ye as his vessel. He whispers in ye mind, “by sea be th’ only way to travel.” ye embark on a journey, killin’ anybody who dares take an airplane or car.
Ye’ve always thought that havin’ a peg leg’d be cool, but arh, the maintenaince yeh have to do to keep up yer cool appearance!
“ye’re seriously makin’ me swim th’ plank again?!”
A pirate cap'n goes on a mission to reclaim th’ pirate ship that was stolen from him 'n free his crew members from imprisonment
Ye have traveled long 'n far in search 'o an infamous treasure that ye 'n ye crew have be searchin’ fer fer 16 years. Upon discoverin’ it, ye open th’ chest only to find a map leadin’ to another treasure. th’ value 'o friendship.
They shout that treasures best be hidden on land. Yer cap'n be sayin’ they’re all lyin’. Yer cap'n be sayin’ th’ best place to be hidin’ treasure be in th’ heart 'o a storm.
Ye ship be sunk, ye maties abandoned ye, but ye still have th’ gold… 'n spiced rum.
Ye be kidnapped from ye home in th’ dead 'o nightfall 'n brought onto a ship wit’ a crew 'o 100 band 'o pirates. As ye look on in fear, they all bow below before ye. One 'o them introduces themselves as ye First Matey. ye be now their cap'n.
Ye muster onboard a scurvy pirate ship, hopin’ to get some doubloons 'n th’ comradery ye sorely missed in th’ navy. But turns out th’ ship ye ended up on has a secret ye would never have guessed…
A forbidden lust story between a sea cap'n 'n a siren he meets at sea.
Ye’ve always wanted to be a scurvy pirate. ye even got ye chance when a fleet 'o them attacked ye town. th’ problem? ye’re a 'land-lubber’ 'n 'tis isn’t a nice world. ye’ll have to prove ye can handle bein’ a scurvy pirate just to make it out 'o th’ brig
Ye’ve just taken control 'o a merchant ship only to find that th’ entire crew be more scared 'o th’ 4 year barnacle-covered girly offsprin’ 'o th’ wealthy tradesman ye’ve locked away. When she smiles, ye spy wit’ ye eye storms in her eyes - 'n then she laughs…
Ye find a cursed treasure. When a piece 'o gold be spent it disappears. How do ye spend ye loot.
“No women allowed on board!” says th’ cap'n. He finds out, one by one, that every member 'o his crew be a woman wit’ a fake beard.
That scurvy scalawag Blackhearted Benton just stole yer ship wit’ all yer lovely booty! GET IT BACK!
“Stop playin’ yer dratted cello, matey, 'n help me sword fight off Blackbeard!”
Ye be th’ first astronaut to be sent to explore th’ galaxy. Suddenly, ye re stopped by space band 'o pirates, 'n be forced to choose between roamin’ aimlessly forever or joinin’ their crew.
Ye got into th’ piratin’ business fer one reason - so ye can afford a ship in Malibu.
“Remind me; if women be bad luck, why do we have a female cap'n?”
Mermaid band 'o pirates. They find new islands 'n take down their enemies wit’ th’ help 'o sea creatures. Their ship be called “Poseidon”
Band 'o pirates that set out to be villains accidentally return as jolly guys by screwin’ plans up
Ye be a feared scurvy pirate who can control all th’ monsters roamin’ th’ seven seas, however ye worst enemy can control th’ oceans themselves.
tell an entire tale in pirate talk, me hearty…
Ye character just got accepted into MIT 'n be sailin’ towards th’ “scurvy pirate Certificate” (pistols, riflery, rowin’, fencin’.) wee do they be knowin’ that these courses be taught by actual band 'o pirates.
An underground illegal racin’ rig has be started that involves scurvy pirate ships battlin’ though a rum track in a Need fer Speed style wit’ steampower-ups included
Ye awaken on a scurvy pirate ship, last thin’ ye remember before 'tis was shoutin’ to a guy in th’ tavern at port. th’ cap'n had bought ye 'n ye be now sailin’ on th’ ship, what happens while ye be at sea?
“HAND ME THAT MAP OR SO HELP ME I’LL CUT IT OFF YA HANDS!”
You turn on the Pirate Speak in Minecraft under language options as a joke, but then ye start findin’ that yer land lubber mates in reality arrrre beginnin’ ta talk like ol’ sea dogs, and even tha signs ‘round yer town turn inta Pirate Speak. Soon a squaky bird takes to perchin’ on yer shoulder. Tha townsfolk begin ta ask fer yer okay on things o’ trivial matter. Yer first mate, who lost 'is leg years ago ta scurvy, suddenly had a peg 'stead of a prosthetic. Congrats, matey– yer tha cap'n of tha town
“Arrrr! the hour to loot EA 'o their precious Sims lovely booty!!”
'tis not uncommon fer a scurvy pirate to loose a hand or a foot on his travels. ye 'n ye crew dig up a chest full 'o hands 'n feet.
Ye swore on a loved one’s grave that ye would someday sail to th’ legendary Grand Arcada, an ocean which none have ever found. this day, ye awoke to find ye ship stolen from ye - 'n th’ strange people seem to be changin’ ye course…
A pirate loses his scurvy pirate accent 'n has to go find a different ship because they don’t fit in anymore.
Ye find an ancient treasure map, 'n indeed, under th’ “X” thar’s buried treasure. But what’s under th’ “Y” 'n “Z”?
Ye cap'n has caught a deadly disease, 'n be on th’ verge 'o Davy Jones’ treasure chest. ye 'n ye crew decide to pull one last raid wit’ them. th’ big one.
Th’ band 'o pirates 'n th’ vampires have come to together to stop th’ ultimate evil. How do ye defend yourself?
Cap'n Gus has a secret, his magic beard grows more wild 'n tangled wit’ every wind it ensnares. Cuttin’ a hair causes a mild breeze, a lock 'o his beard unleashes a strong wind. Now, captured 'n condemned to execution, he asks if he could shave
Ye be th’ cap'n 'o th’ most infamous scurvy pirate ship on th’ seven seven seas, ye 'n ye crew have be through pretty much everythin’ together. Currently ye be on th’ hunt fer mer-people, they fetch high prices on th’ black market fer their beauty. What ye crew dont be knowin’ however be that ye be a mer-person 'n ye 'n ye kind only have tails when ye peglegs get wet.ye’re in th’ middle 'o a bath in ye quarters when ye first matey bustles in to speak to ye 'bout th’ ship’s course.
Ye be a notorious scurvy pirate. ye’ve always be able to outrun th’ navy, but 'tis the hour they’re gainin’ on ye. ye agree to make a deal wit’ one 'o th’ lesser captains. What do they shout to ye?
Arr, ye main character be kidnapped by a scurvy pirate at sea! It turns out th’ sea isn’t what it seems to be when he throws ye overboard to die….
Ye cap'n has be noticeably feelin’ down, how does one scurvy pirate cheer up their cap'n back to their jolly self?
What do ye do wit’ a drunken sailer?
Ye’re a pirate who’s totally new to th’ business 'o stealin’ treasure from authoritative figures 'n don’t really be knowin’ what ye’re doin’. Suddenly, a dragon shows up 'n offers to tutor ye in piracy. What next?
“What be land? I have forgotten.”
Ye’re an undercover employee 'o th’ british government onboard a pirate ship on 'tis way to an uncharted island. ye mission be to find out what th’ band 'o pirates be goin’ thar fer.
A pirate wit’ a rubber duck hand instead 'o a rusted hook
Lesbian pirate flirtin’ wit’ sirens
Ye were sent by th’ British government to spy on a notorious cap'n. ye join his crew 'n climb up th’ ranks 'til ye become his first matey. A few days before ye be to betray him, he tells ye a secret that changes everythin’. What be it?
Th’ cap'n has gone missin’ overnight. ye, a mere chef, be th’ only one who can manage to control th’ crew. ye need to find whar ye cap'n has gone to.
She was they best cap'n to sail th’ sea’s. She was Black Beard.
Band 'o pirates be pillagin’ ye village, lookin’ fer somethin’. What they’re lookin’ fer be a wee unorthodox
Th’ year be th’ far future, 'n space travel has be achieved. th’ human race has be denied entry into th’ galactic federations set up hundreds 'o years before their time. So, instead, we become space band 'o pirates. All 'o us.
All ye pirates be sufferin from th’ evil scurvy, no matter how much citrus or undercooked meat they brin’ on th’ poop deck. they shout yer crews favoured wi th’ devil, but wee do they be knowin’ ye’ve just found th’ third cure to th’ scurvy
“fer th’ last the time, don’t be puttin’ me tattered eyepatch in th’ dryer!”
Ye look almost exactly like th’ female version 'o ye twin brother. Unfortunately, ye twin brother just so happens to be th’ notorious cap'n 'o a pirate crew. One day, he be killed, 'n th’ crew asks ye to pretend to be him so as to continue
Th’ mermaid they pulled from th’ ocean turns out to be a jolly fighter. Maybe too jolly. Sh just killed th’ cap'n.
Ye got scurvy. How ya gonna hide it from th’ cap'n?
Ye pirate ship be stuck in 5 O'clock traffic. Somehow.
Ye’re a stowaway on th’ dreaded cap'n LongBeard’s ship, tryin’ to find out whar he hides his treasure. Only problem be, ye’ve gotten caught sneakin’ around below deck.
Ye’re th’ only jolly scurvy pirate in ye crew. ye’ve be tryin’ to keep it a secret, but then ye ship happens to sail past a group 'o sirens…
Ye command one 'o th’ fiercest scurvy pirate ships in th’ seven seas. Just th’ mention 'o ye crew sends fear into th’ hearts 'o men 'n women. th’ only thin’ be, ye’ve never stepped foot on a boat.
Ye’ve be travelin’ th’ seven seas fer a while now. Nothin’ can stand in ye way; ye 'n ye crew be unstoppable. 'til one thin’ crossed ye paths. What be that one thin’ 'n how do ye overcome it?
Ye be th’ toughest scurvy pirate around. ye won many fights, pillaged many towns, 'n plundered dozens 'o ships. nothin’ could stand in ye way to riches, not even- oh god be that a baby on ye ship? who brought a baby?
Ye be sailin’ th’ seven seven seas when yer lovely booty grows peglegs 'n starts swimmin’ off. How do ya catch a swimmin’ treasure hoard?
Ye be a sea cap'n. Suddenly, ye ship lifts into th’ air. ye’re bein’ raided by sky band 'o pirates!
Due to men believin’ eatin’ fruit was too feminine, th’ seven seas be now ruled by female band 'o pirates who beat their weakened males counterparts. Now, ye’re at a parrrty drinkin’ ornge spiced juice wit’ th’ victors.
All ye pirates knows only women be sailors. Can ye think 'o anythin’ more unlucky than to have a scurvy dog onboard a ship? Still, rumour has it that th’ fiercest scurvy pirate ship 'o them all has a only-male crew.
Ye meet Sodomy McScurvyLegs 'n buy a fitness regime. It opens up a whole new seven seas fer ye, an endless sea 'o knowledge… 'bout lovely booty.
Turns out 'tis eyepatch be cursed to ne'er come off! Too bad ye put it on t’ wrong eye!
Yrr secret island has been made into a parking lot and is overrun by scurvy lawyers while you were pirating. How do you fight lawyers? Your treasure is under that asphalt.
Th’ cap'n 'o a magical sailin’ pirate ship takes several orphans under her proverbial win’s as new crew members
“I lost m'hand to a shark, but I lost me eye to…”
A rollickin’ scurvy pirate adventure from th’ point 'o view 'o th’ ship’s sea monster: th’ cat
A classic pirate adventure wit’ a cursed object. Part 'o th’ curse be that th’ scurvy pirate cap'n 'n crew can never leave th’ ship 'n must come up wit’ creative ways to plunder, pillage, 'n eventually break th’ curse.
Cuddle band 'o pirates- th’ fluffiest, snuggliest scurvy pirate crew ye can imagine, inexplicably survivin’ through skill 'n pluck in a grimdark hyper-edgy universe, rebellin’ against th’ grim 'n gritty status quo wit’ unflinchin’ optimism 'n hugs.
“How th’ muck did ye get onto me ship 'n why be ye naked”
“So ye meanin’ to be tellin’ me th’ map, which ye bought off a street vendor at Ivery Island, be an authentic map that leads to a literal buried treasure. scurvy dog, speak 'bout cliche.”
Ye be highly disappointed when ye discover that th’ famous deadly 'Kraken’ be actually just a nutcracker.
Two pirates travel th’ seven seas lookin’ fer lovely booty, but it turns out all they really want be each others lovely booty
Ye finally come home from a year at sea 'n have to explain to ye main wench how ye got syphillis
A scurvy pirate find th’ greatest treasure to be had: an island covered in lovely booty.
Ye’re a pirate explorin’ uncharted waters when suddenly a giant hand made out 'o rum rises out 'o th’ ocean holdin’ a small baby wrapped in seaweed. th’ hand places th’ younglin’ on th’ deck 'o ye ship 'n disappears back into th’ depths. ye now have a child 'n a lot 'o questions.
captains, greedy 'n tough 'n mean. But th’ strange thin’ 'bout him be that he wears a metal mask, 'n no one in th’ crew has ever seen him without it. One nightfall, ye resolve to spy wit’ ye eye th’ cap'n’s real face, so ye sneak into his cabin 'n sneak a peek 'o him sans mask. 'n what ye spy wit’ ye eye makes it clear to ye why ye cap'n would hide his face.
Perhaps givin’ band 'o pirates Google Maps wasn’t th’..best idea
Ye somehow became a pirate cap'n. One problem - ye be knowin’ nothin’ 'bout navigation…or ships…or fightin’ in general. But ye look well in a pirate coat 'n a hat, so thar be that.
Ye’ve be captured by pirates, 'n thrown in th’ brig. th’ cap'n’s trusty parrot flies in, 'n says he can help ye escape.
“Matey, yer lovely booty be th’ only one I be diggin’ fer t'night.”
Ye’ve found pirate treasure by sheer dumb luck, but now th’ ghost 'o th’ lady pirate it belonged to be hauntin’ ye. 'n if that wasn’t that be all you can take, she’s got a crush on ye.
Yer on a boat when suddenely yer First Mate throws 'imself over with no apparent reason. You dive in after him and find a grotto. What’s beyond it?
Ye be that one guy on th’ ship that can swim. Somethin’ has jammed th’ rudder, stoppin’ th’ ship from makin’ it to port.
Pretend ye’re a pirate 'n ye’ve just buried ye treasure. Draw a map 'n scribe below detailed instructions on how to find it again.
What prompt do ye like th’ most? Reblog if ye be a true scurvy pirate.
DIG’S ART MODAFOKA!!! /O/ because she allowed me to post (ﾉ≧ڡ≦) and i’m more than happy to share it she made fanart too for @im-toxicixy ‘s AU X3c yes we both love it okay long time no see ART like real art man!
A/N: I felt like it’d been a while since I’d written anything that focused on Yoongi, so I really wanted to write something~ I started this a few weeks ago and then got distracted by life and finishing up college for the semester, but I finally finished it so here I am~ Hopefully you all enjoy it lol
Clubs aren’t your thing—but you give them a chance, because
you don’t want to seem like the party pooper amongst your group of friends.
Despite their efforts to get you to show some skin, though, you still end up
walking into the club wearing a tank-top, skinny jeans, and a pair of laced up
high-tops. You weren’t here to be hit on—you didn’t want some creep trying to
slide his hand up your inner thigh. You were here to socialize, down some
drinks to get over your regret of coming, and then hopefully leave with the
first friend in your group who would call it a night.
So, you saddle up to the bar, waving at your friends as they
scuttle out onto the dance floor—all high heels and short skirts. Once they
disappear into the throng of grinding bodies, you spin on your stool, turning
to rest your elbows on the counter top—
…and the bartender is right in front of you. Skinny, but
well rounded—dark hair hanging slightly into his eyes, black button up fitted
to his torso perfectly. His face remains void of any emotion, but when he
catches your surprised stare and the slight part of your lips, he smirks.
“What can I start you with?” he asks, voice deeper than you
had expected, a bit rough, but still clearly heard over the music of the club.
You pause at the question, your mind blanking.
“I…I’ll take a rum and coke, unless you have something
better to give me,” you say, trying to scrape up your remaining shred of
composure. The male cocks an eyebrow, looking a little contemplative.
“You wanna get drunk? Or do you just wanna buzz so you can
still punch the guy that tries to steal your panties? I mean you gotta throw me
a bone here.”
“I don’t even fucking know, man,” you say honestly, leaning
back a little to motion at yourself. “Look at me. I mean—it’s not exactly like
easy access is written all over my jean-clad legs.”
The bartender hums, reaching down to snag a shot glass.
“I’ve been looking at you for a minute or two now and you’re surprising cute
despite the outfit,” he comments, reaching behind him to grab a bottle of Kahlua.
“Clearly you’re not here to let anyone finger you in the back alleyway,
though,” he continues, chuckling when he catches your blush and stunned look.
With skill, he snatches up a bottle of Grand Marnier and
Bailey’s too, layering the liquors in a shot glass with exact precision. When
he’s finished, he gently slides it towards you, meeting your questionable
“It’s good. Sweet liquor for a sweet girl. Take it—it’ll
help you loosen up a little.”
“Are bartenders usually this flirty?” you question him,
downing the shot in one go (because damn this dude is making you warm already).
“Only to those who perk our interest,” he responds, taking
the shot glass from you after you set down. You laugh, feeling somewhat
“Yeah? Should I consider myself lucky then?”
“Depends on your definition of lucky,” he chuckles, eyes
fliting to the side when another couple up the bar slurs for him. Smile
dropping from his lips, he quickly moves around, throwing some ice into a
glass—filling it a third full with rum and the remainder with coke.
“Suck on that till I get back,” he says briefly, sliding it
to you, and you watch him, brows lifted in surprise as he quickly goes to tend
on other patrons.
Taking the cool glass into your hand, you gently swirl the
contents before taking a long sip.
You’re not sure what that bartender is aiming for, playing
with your emotions like this, but…dammit, you really don’t mind.
Ten minutes later, dark and mysterious bartender is back in
front of you, elbow propped on the counter, interest sparking in his irises as
he listens to you ramble about all the things you don’t really like about
clubs. You hadn’t exactly meant to just…open up to him, but…you’re beginning to
think your tolerance is a bit lighter than you had assumed.
“I’m baffled you’re even here,” he muses, refilling your
glass. “It seems like you’d rather be at home, reading a book, or doing some
kind of other dorky, yet cute thing.”
“Right? I don’t
know, man—I wanted to not seem like the boring friend, but even when I’m here
I’m still hiding at the bar,” you say, sighing, and rest your cheek in the palm
of your hand. The bartender breathes a laugh, regarding you thoughtfully.
“You could always go.”
“Yeah, but…,” you begin, eyes flitting up to his, and his
stare has you feeling a bit weak. “You’re here.”
At that, that man pauses, any movement stopping as his eyes
fall from yours, lowering to regard the countertop. You watch him, cheeks hot,
regret sinking in your stomach. Luckily, after a few seconds—instead of walking
away or anything else that could potentially break your heart—he meets your
gaze again and opens his mouth to respond.
…however, just as he does, the same drunk couple form before
shouts for him at the other end of the bar and, sighing, the dark haired male
hurries away. You’re once again left staring after him, hands fidgeting against
your half-downed glass.
What the hell are you doing?
A little less than 20 minutes later—mister dark and
mysterious having somehow disappeared from the bar without you noticing, you
push your finished drink to the side and slide off your stool. You don’t want
to drink anymore—you really don’t want to be here—and now that the flirty, cute
bartender is gone, you’re not quite sure what to do with yourself.
More than anything, you just want to tap out and go home,
but, before you can, one of your friends spots you near the edge of the dance
floor and hurries over. Grabbing your wrist, she tugs you into the mass of
people, and you can’t think to tell her that you’re really not in the mood for
dancing—especially considering that she has already dragged you into the middle
of the action.
So, reluctantly, trying to let any of your worries go (as
well as thoughts of the dark-haired bartender—who you may or may not have
fallen for), you begin dancing with your friends. At first, things go well—you
loosen up a bit, swing your hips, feel the music—but after a few minutes you
feel a pair of hands land on your hips. Glancing down—catching sight of pale,
long fingers—you realize that this isn’t one of your girlfriends.
“Sorry–,” you begin, taking a step forward, trying to let
the person know that you’re not about that tonight—but the fingers only
tighten, and you feel a males chest lightly press against your back.
“You said weren’t about dancing, yet when I stopped by the
bar on my way out for the night and noticed you were gone, I find you out here
on the dance floor,” the deep, familiar voice speaks, and fuck the heat you’d felt before is igniting your blood once more.
“My shift was over. I left to grab my stuff and planned to come
back to the bar to take you home with me, but—”
“I…what??” you say, flushing red, turning your head to try
and face him, but his fingers dig into your waist, holding your still, and his
lips press heatedly against your neck. That has you gasping, grinding back
against him as his teeth and tongue work at your throat.
“My name is Yoongi, by the way,” he says, sucking
particularly hard, and your knees nearly buckle.
“Yoongi,” you repeat, testing the name on your tongue. But
his name alone rolling from your lips has Yoongi growling quietly, one of his
hands sinking lower to grip your ass through your jeans. You bite your lip to
keep from moaning, lifting one of your hands backwards to tug his hair.
“If you were going to take me home then take me already,”
you breathe, grinding your ass back yet again, and before you can gather your
head you’re being pulled off the dance floor, Yoongi’s grip tight on you wrist.
Hey guys! It’s me again, and I sorta wanted to write a Tom meet-cute because I daydream about those 25/8? This is just soft, fluffy and sweet, I hope you like it!
Author’s note: Tom is my screensaver and I went to Barnes and Noble today and the girl that was ringing me up was really, really nice and we were talking about Marvel because I was buying a comic, (I finally found Spider-Man Blue, three cheers for me!) and she was literally like, “oh my gosh, you and Tom would be super adorable together! I can just see it now!” And I sort of died? So this is just a story branching off of that?
“Is that your boyfriend?” The saleslady asked, referencing the girl’s phone, as a smile that stretched from ear to ear crossed over her features. “He comes in quite often, has mostly good taste in books, although, sometimes his choices are questionable at best. Likes fantasy and adventure, some good, some not.”
The girl’s eyes widened and her mouth flopped open and shut like a guppy’s as she attempted to stutter out an appropriate response.
Tom Holland was the girl’s screensaver, and no, he most definitely wasn’t her boyfriend because he had no idea that she existed. Even if he had stumbled across her fan account, she’d just be another fan to Tom, maybe she’d even stand out for being an ultimate creep.
“He’s a very polite boy, you’re so lucky! My daughters are only interested in self-obsessed assholes.” The lady began to scan her choices, continuing to rant about her daughter’s apparent bad taste in men.
The girl was still struggling to comprehend her situation. The saleswoman clearly knew Tom, who apparently came in often, as did she, so she couldn’t really say that he wasn’t her boyfriend without looking like an utter and complete weirdo.
Pondering, she bit the inside of her cheek. Their paths had never crosses, so what could be the harm in indulging in a little fantasy? “We’ve been dating since last Spring,” She said, not daring to look into the kind eyes of the saleswoman.
“Ah, I see. I bet you two look absolutely adorable together, maybe turn him onto some high quality literature next time he comes in, eh?” The woman smiled from across the counter, waving the girl’s new Philip Roth books in the air before handing them over.
Reaching for her five purchases, the girl smiled and nodded, “I’ll do my very best!” She called and waved as she left the store.
Over the next few days, Tom wandered back into the bookstore. Navigating his way down the store’s narrow aisles, Tom searched for something that he could read on the plane that he’d inevitably be boarding sometime soon. He paused every so often to pick up a book, glance over the summary on the back, and reshelve it to it’s proper home.
After shuffling down another section, he came across the very same saleswoman who had helped the girl moonlighting as his girlfriend.
“How come you guys never come in together? She knows some good authors, I’m sure she’d love to help broaden your horizons.” The saleswoman said, maintaining her position, crouched over to straighten and tidy the shelves.
Tom looked around, unsure of who the woman was speaking to, because as far as he knew, none of his friends knew about this store. They opted for Barnes and Noble, while he prefered to dig.
“Yes, you. I just met your girlfriend and she’s lovely. Great taste in books.” The woman said again.
Scratching his head, Tom wasn’t exactly sure what to say, so he played along, not wanting to be rude. Surely she must be confusing him with someone else, because he didn’t have a girlfriend to share books with, as much as he’d like one.
“Yeah, we just have different schedules, she’s usually in class when I peruse the bookstore.” Tom said, bending down to help the woman on the floor.
“She’s very cute, and very sweet. It’s nice to see young people reading something that isn’t their twitter feed.” The woman said, taking one last glance at the fixed up shelf, before nodding decisively and standing up.
Tom stood as well, chuckling, “My Dad’s an author, so reading has always been apart of my life.”
“You guys are lovely, let me know if I can be of any help.” The woman began to walk away and Tom shook his head and laughed.
“How do you know that my girl is my girl? We never come in at the same time.” Tom asked suddenly, curiosity leaking into his bloodstream.
“She comes in more often than you, buys more books than you, and you’re her screensaver. It’s quite cute, actually.” The saleslady called out.
There it is, Tom thought, she might be a fan. He couldn’t think of any other reason that he’d be her screensaver. Shoving his hands into his pockets, Tom smirked and picked out not one, but two books. One to leave at the register for her the next time that he came in, and one for him to read while he was on the press tour.
“That is so thoughtful! She’ll love it!” The woman said from behind the cash register, clapping her hands together. “I’ll make sure that she gets it, alright? Wanna put a little message in it, promise I won’t peak! I’ve got a pen right here!” She chirped happily.
“Yeah, alright, I’ll actually do that. Could I please borrow your pen?” Tom asked.
Drawing a heart to conclude the note to his ‘girlfriend’ that he’d never met, he said thank you one to the lady one last time and left the store.
The very next morning, the girl pushed her wallet back into her purse at the bookstore’s register, waiting for the same saleswoman to finish ringing her up.
“Saw your boyfriend yesterday, left a little something for you.” The saleswoman smiled, turning around to sift through the books on display behind her to find Tom’s choice for the girl.
The girl felt the fiery licks of scarlet coloring her skin again. Her hands shook, surely Tom thought that she was a mega, ultra stalker. He’d probably left her a note begging her to kindly fuck off. She wished Mother Earth would swallow her up the same way it did to Sita in ‘The Ramayana.’
“Don’t be embarrassed, silly, it’s endearing.” The woman handed her a book titled, ‘Twenty Love Poems and a Song of Despair’ by Pablo Neruda. “He’s paid for it, of course, and he left you a little note on the first page. Lent him the pen myself.”
“He really shouldn’t have,” the girl stuttered, her hands almost noticeably shaking as she held the book within her palms.
Inside, Tom had scribbled out,
Seeing as you’re my girlfriend, I thought it was only fitting to leave you at least twenty love poems. Left you a song of despair as well, seeing as we haven’t met yet.
Your devoted boyfriend, Tom
“Could I go back and pick one out for him as well?” The girl asked, feeling a tiny bit braver after reading Tom’s cheeky message for her.
“Of course! I love this, I wish more couples did things like this for each other, it’s endearing!” The saleswoman smiled, shutting the register.
After picking out an appropriate novel, she left the store, smiling, blushing and practically gliding on air.
Later that very afternoon, Tom was chased by the overbearing coldness of the afternoon breeze, and his own excitement over whether or not she’d received his present, back into the bookstore.
Not even bothering to look at anything, he came to a halt in front of the saleswoman, who upon seeing him enter, tore through her display to retrieve the novel that she’d left for him.
“Did she get it? Did she like it, I haven’t heard from her yet.” Tom asked, beaming at the woman.
“She loved it! She loved it so much, in fact, that she’s left one for you as well.” She handed him a novel called ‘One Day.’ “She’s left a love note for you as well!”
Tearing the book open, Tom came across her delicate handwriting sprawled in black ink.
Here’s to hoping that I meet you one day.
With all the love in my heart-
Your mystery girlfriend
Fighting the urge to hug the book closer to his chest, Tom made a choice.
“I’m going to go pick her a book out right now, and I’m going to wait right here until she comes back in. I want to give her this one in person.” Tom turned on his heel to search for the perfect book for to give her, when the saleswoman informed him that she’d already been in today.
“Alright then, I’ll be back first thing tomorrow.” Tom blushed, but continued on his way down through the shelves, desperate to find the perfect book for her.
Deciding on ‘You,’ by Caroline Kepnes, Tom paid and left the store, planning to return right when the bookstore opened.
The very next morning, Tom was perched in a cushy, plush chair, obscured by stacks and shelves housing novels, waiting for her. He’d positioned himself perfectly, ensuring that he could see the register at all times, but that the people at the register wouldn’t be able to spot him, unless they knew where he was hiding.
He was completely on edge. Every time the door opened, he’d practically leap to his feet, only to be met with disappointment because mostly everyone who wandered in off the street was either male, or too old to be his mystery girlfriend.
Finally, when Tom had all but lost hope, a girl so otherworldly beautiful that Tom truly debated in his mind whether or not the girl was even a girl, he briefly wondered if she was an ethereal fairy of sorts, floated into the room.
Her hair reflected light the same way that waves in the sea did, and her voice was so soft and warm that it sounded as he imagined his favorite hot drink would taste. She waved hello to the saleswoman before diving into the poetry section, hidden deep within the store.
Jumping to his feet, Tom rushed to finally meet her, rolling the book he planned to give her in between his palms.
Checking his hair one more time, Tom came to a stop next to her.
“Excuse me miss, I was just wondering if you happen to be my mystery girlfriend, who apparently has better taste in books than me?” Tom’s confidence was evaporating as she turned around to face him.
She was even prettier up close and Tom wanted to scratch his own eyes out for beginning the conversation with such a shit line.
Thankfully, she smiled, a strawberry jam colored blush widening across her delicate features. “That would be me, but unfortunately, you’ve caught me off guard and now I don’t have anything to give to you.” Her eyes refused to meet his own for more than a few seconds.
She could barely believe any of this. First, her celebrity crush and her happened to both shop at the same bookstore. Then, he goes along with the charade of being her boyfriend, and even leaves her gifts, and now, he was standing in front of her.
He looked like Prince Charming and her brain was turning to mush.
“Lucky for you, I don’t mind. But, I do have a book for you.” Holding the novel, ‘You,’ out to her, he began to sway from foot to foot, nervous that she’d hate it.
“Funny enough, that’s one of my favorite books,” She laughed, “But are you planning to kill me?” She referenced the plot of ‘You,’ which was more or less a horror story, hardly the conventional romance.
Stuttering, Tom attempted to clear his name. “I just thought it was fitting, seeing as we met in a bookstore, and so did Joe and Beck,” the main characters who become romantically involved in the novel, “And really, I just wanted you to have the line about the mouse in the house.”
“Are you going to get a cat to chase me out?” She teased, and Tom laughed.
“Absolutely not, you’re just all I’ve been thinking about. I wanna know you, and learn from your apparently epic choices in literature.” Tom said, leaning in closer to her.
“Than sit, and I’ll pick you something out?” She questioned, shyly moving to sit on the floor, her arm curled around more than a few options.
The pair scooched into one another one the floor, and the saleswoman watched, smiling from her spot at the register. Her two favorite customers were finally together.
Her eyes twinkled as she turned the radio onto a station that played only love songs.
They read love poems, and love stories together, so it only seemed fair that they listened to only love songs as well.
thought i’d try out posting my writings on tumblr (yay). we’ll see how that goes. nothing triggering i should think, some mental health musings only.
It’s cold (tiny shards of ice against his skin) when he sits (almost down, down, down) on the edge of the rooftop. The wind blows like it could topple him to the ground, but it doesn’t, and instead Alec merely sways like an unruly sea, back and forth and back and forth. His fingers are gripping the ledge and he uncurls them, lets them flex long and then curl back against the concrete. It’s like breathing, except he can’t breathe, hasn’t been able to in a long time. Not breathing in a way that he should.
The balcony doors open behind him and Alec drags himself closer to the sound, because he’s not ready for the disapproval (it’s always wrong, he’s always wrong, never right). But the words don’t come. Soon, there are warm fingers wrapping around his wrist.
Silence. Alec doesn’t look up from the street; his lids feel heavy, like his entire body was sculpted out of lead.
“Alexander,” Magnus finally breathes out, soft and like a whisper, but strong still.
“Magnus,” Alec says. The name feels good on his tongue, it rolls like perfection, and Alec finds himself repeating it. “Magnus.”
Just a little Kalluzeb I had to write after that damn fanalie. Spoilers for season 3. Also available on ao3.
Kallus was still standing at the back of the Ghost when Zeb walked up to him.
“Hey Kallus, I was curious, if - ah - if anyone had looked you over…” Zeb trailed off while gesturing at Kallus’ face.
Kallus managed to hold back a wince as he gave a half smile. “No. It’s fine really. There are others that need the attention more than I do.”
Zeb rolled his eyes and his ear flicked, “Come on, I’ll patch ya up.”
Kallus hesitated for a moment, but the look Zeb threw over his shoulder was too much. He couldn’t refuse.
While walking to the small medbay they had on board, Kallus felt like everyone was staring at him. He felt so out of place, still in his ISB uniform.
Zeb gestured to a seat, while he grabbed some supplies. “This really isn’t necessary, Zeb. Honestly. I’ll be fine.”
“Shut it. You kept us from dying. Now sit still, this is probably going to sting.” Kallus pretended not to notice the smirk Zeb had while saying that last part.
Kallus winced, but didn’t move. Zeb’s hand was gentle on his chin, as he helped keep him steady.
“You know,” Zeb started after a moment, keeping an eye on what he was doing. “We really are all grateful for what you’ve done for us. You gave up everything just to help us, to help the entire rebellion. I - we want to thank you for doing that.”
Zeb still hadn’t attempted to make eye contact, and if Kallus was honest with himself, he was grateful for it.
Kallus wasn’t able to say anything for a few moments, trying to decide the right words. “It was the honorable thing to do.”
Zeb smiled as his ears perked forward. He took a step back as he wrapped one hand around the other, doing the small traditional bow.
After a moment Zeb placed one of his large hands on Kallus’ shoulder turning him around “C’mon Kal, let’s see if we can get you set up with some new clothes. I’m sure we’ve got something,these are a little outdated for you.”
Kallus gasped, he definitely landed on that shoulder at one point, “Fine, but if you hand me a one armed sweater, you are dropping me off at the next habitable planet.”
Zeb laughed heartily. Kallus was glad to have had the chance to hear it, and hoped he would hear it much more often.
Y’ever think Kaidan gets hot and bothered watching Vanguard Shep out in the field? I mean… like in between nearly dying. Cause let’s be honest, Vanguard Shepard is a fucking juggernaut. Kinda hot. JUST saying.
Miss Daniels, Miss flower girl, sweep me away on your wind motivated petals to somewhere where the sun never stops shining. Where the soil is rich and the rain keeps us young, Miss Daniels, Miss flower girl, please take me there.
Could we get another installment of The Getaway please?
Any plans to continue The Getaway?
Wrapping her large scarf around her neck, Claire waited in the draughty bus station walking from end to end as she tried to decipher the local routes. Hungry and cold, it’d been just over two days of heavy travelling and the extended journey was beginning to take its toll on poor Claire.
Requests: “could I request a
credence’s smut that he’s confident and he and the reader are at a party and
she provokes him and they have sex in somewhere at home? I love your fics ♡”
Pairing: Credence Barebone x Reader
Word Count: 2087
Warnings: Smut, alcohol, DIRTY TALK AH
“This party blows.” You droned, leaning your head into Credence’s
“Aw c’mon, it’s not that bad.” He smirked.
“It really is. Can we go home soon?”
“No, I told Newt that I’d stick around at least until the toast.
You know how much this means to him.”
“Ugh, don’t remind me.” You groaned. “But you have to admit, he
has no idea how to throw a fun party.”
“We can make it fun.” He shrugged. You narrowed your eyes at the
young man, beginning to nod with him as you simultaneously thought of the same
The room twirled as you sat on a couch
with Credence, watching people talk, dance, and enjoy themselves. You turned to
him, finding his eyes to be just as glazed as yours with a stuporous look.
“You having fun yet?” Credence asked,
poking at your sides. You flinched, giggling as you caught his hands in yours.
“There’s still more fun to be had.”
You mumbled, your lopsided smirk growing as you placed a not so subtle hand on
Credence’s thigh. He took in a sharp breath, simply watching your fingers slide
up at a tantalising pace.
“(Y/n)! Credence!” A voice called.
Credence whined as you withdrew your hand instantly. “I’m so glad you two
came!” Queenie drunkenly wobbled over, Jacob on her tail.