ya fart

So I heard it was a special somebody’s birthday today! (ok, I may be a tad late but I tried haha) I hope you had a fantastic day, Jack! I’m so proud of you for all of your hard work and dedication. You’re inspiring! Best wishes to you!!

6

is it really march 1, 2017???? making justin drew bieber 23?? and making myself be a fan of his lousy ass for 7 fucking years? im shook. in disbelief. happy birthday to the man who causes me so much grief, emotion but shout out because he (barely) knows my existence!!! kudos to you for distracting me from college work and for making me barely functioning in the real world. but honestly i hope this year is filled with so much love and happiness you damn fool. i can’t wish this old ballz enough fullness and genuine bliss an to have a fabulous birthday. im happy to have been a fan for so long, god knows it wasn’t easy!! love ya lots ya old fart. be happy babe, 23rd never looked better xx

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo haley

HAPPY 53rd BIRTHDAY MAJIMA!!!! [ MAY 14TH ]

(this is v v v rushed and I wanted to add more characters but ran out of time hgosidighaiodsfjj)(also crappy birthday hat version under the cut)

Keep reading

steinbecks  asked:

plot twist: mako put the googly eyes on his nipples. korra walks in, bursts into laughter, and runs out because she has to pee

jfc… my aesthetic: shirtless mako with googly eyes on his nip nops

3

Blade to blade, they were identical. After thousands of hours in lightsaber sparring, they knew each other better than brothers, more intimately than lovers; they were complementary halves of a single warrior.

Fangirl rule #32
When a guy you’re hitting on is acting like a total douche - draw hot fictional guys to ease your anger! (because anger leads to hate, which leads to suffering, if you catch my drift).

Oh, and I’m totally blaming shorelle for this! She draws the best Anakin and SW fanart on tumblr ♥

And apparently, I like making myself sad
BRB, BROTP feels

|||OTL

THE  CROW  SENTENCE  STATERS.

  • Buildings burn, people die, but real love is forever.
  • Can’t rain all the time…
  • Police! Don’t move! I said, "Don’t move!”
  • I thought the police always said, “Freeze!”
  • I used to think they were kind of trivial. 
  • Believe me, nothing is trivial.
  • Little things used to mean so much.
  • Your daughter/son is out there on the streets waiting for you.
  • What are you talking about?
  • You heard me rapping, right?
  • Victims; aren’t we all?
  • Is that gasoline I smell?
  • They’re all dead. They just don’t know it yet.
  • A building gets torched, all that is left is ashes.
  • Don’t you ever fuckin’ die?
  • Can you put me up for the night?
  • Abashed the Devil stood and felt how awful goodness is.
  • It’s more like surfing than skating.
  • I wish the rain would stop just once.
  • What? What are you talking about?
  • Who gives a shit? It’s ancient history.
  • You mean that place downtown? Yeah, I remember.
  • Why? What do you want? What is it? What?
  • Did you send us these complaints?
  • I knew I knew you. But you ain’t you. 
  • You can’t be you. We put you through the window.
  • This is the really real world, there ain’t no coming back.
  • There ain’t no coming back.
  • We killed you dead, there ain’t no coming back!
  • I have something to give you.
  • I thought, you know, you were invincible!
  • Thirty hours of pain all at once, all for you.
  • I thought I’d use your front door.
  • What are you supposed to be, a clown or something?
  • Look, I’m beggin’ you, alright? Don’t kill me.
  • So many cops, you’d think they givin’ away donuts.
  • Aw, this is already boring the shit out of me. Kill ‘em!
  • How the hell did that thing get in here?
  • ” A whole jolly club with jolly pirate nicknames!
  • I’m sorry if I spoiled your wedding plans there, friend.
  • Hey, that shit ain’t even loaded, man.
  • You shouldn’t smoke these. They’ll kill you.
  • Look what you’ve done… to my sheets.
  • For a ghost you bleed just fine.
  • Goddamn creatures of the night. They never learn.
  • You have one chance to live.
  • Look, man take anything you want. “
  • Don’t you know this game?
  • You are seriously fucked up. 
  • I mean, you need professional help!
  • Would you look in the mirror?
  • Holy shit! God-damned foreign cars!
  • I can see why they took away your gold shield!
  • Yeah? And maybe you’re not such a big shot, either!
  • Say hello to the last fella who wouldn’t cooperate with me.
  • All the power in the world rests in the eyes, fella.
  • It’s fun, it’s easy, and you gonna learn all about it.
  • Murderer? Let me tell you about murder.
  • I’m not sure about the face, though.
  • Fire it up! Fire it up! Fire it up! Fire it up!
  • Who the fuck are you supposed to be, man?
  • I don’t even fucking know you, man. 
  • I’m sure you’ll remember. You killed them, on Halloween.
  • My livelihood got flushed and went swirling. “
  • I want you to set a fire so goddamn big, the gods’ll notice us.
  • I feel like a little worm on a big fuckin’ hook.
  • Oh for fuck’s sake, die, will ya?
  • They make you fart, big time.
  • What’s all this happy horseshit?
  • You burn yourself playing with matches?
  • This is a first. Do I bow or do I curtsy?
  • It’s all been done before, you see what I’m sayin’?
  • Grave? What grave? What about my fucking grave?
  • I call it blood, detective. I suppose you’ll write it up as “graffiti”.
  • Don’t any of your street-demons have real grown-up names?
  • I think you can rule out accidental death.
  • I see you have made your decision, now let’s see you enforce it.
  • People once believed that when someone dies, a crow carries their soul to the land of the dead.
getoveryou

this was going to be my magnum opus but god had other plans i guess, i keep checking my phone but it’s blank and it will stay that way after what went down

i used up my best metaphors for previous poems, now i’m just left with the truth except i’m not used to this kind of loneliness – it burns

you left in a blaze of nothing, you abandoned the ship before it ever left port

you you you but i’m tired of talking about you…

today’s an old day but the hours are new and my bloody nose has dried and my veins aren’t stinging anymore, i think i have it in my power to get over you

Super!Mingyu // Super!Seventeen AU

A/N: Hi guys~ This is my first AU! This was inspired by posts by other amazing writers and prompts so I decided to make a bunch of them. This one is a mash between Best Friend!AU and Super!AU and is quite long so buckle up! Be sure to be on the lookout for upcoming Super!Seventeen posts and thank you for reading! Enjoy! :D

P.S. Many fart jokes. Mentions of gummy bears. 

Notes to be taken: In this AU..

  1. Not everyone is a super
  2. Some supers live normal lives despite their powers while others work for the government, military, etc.

Originally posted by waejin


  •  lmao ok where do we even start with this guy
  • You’ve basically known Mingyu from kindergarten
  • He’s a pretty low key kid tbh, you never would’ve thought he’s a super
  • So the story starts when one day, in kindergarten, in the middle of the finger painting class, you farted ya it’s gross, get over it. Kids only eat, sleep poop and cry while farting inbetween.
  • So you’re kind of the silent-killer type of farter ok aka no sound but deadly
  • There’s another kid in class who’s infamous for having farting episodes 
  • So the whole class plus the teacher was like “ugh not again Kevin wstg we have enough of ur sh**” and are accusing him of this crime poor Kevin
  • Nobody suspected it was you (‘sorry Kevin’)
  • B U T  T H E N
  • You feel a tap on your shoulder and turned around to see this one kid with a bad haircut and trail of snot on his face
  • And you can’t help but zone in until he said
  • “I know it’s you”
  • Lol you’re f***ed.
  • Your know you gotta do something before he reports you to the teacher and you can’t have your entire kindergarten career and reputation just crumble into dust over a fart 
  • So what did you do?
  • “I’ll share my gummy bears with you but you will n e v e r tell a soul”
  • “Ok" 
  • Well that was easy
  • Anyways
  • From that day on Snotty aka Kim Mingyu follows you around like a lost puppy and sits with you during snack time for the sake of gummy bears kid knows his priorities
  • Everytime you won’t share your candies with him, he blackmails you by threatening to tell the teacher that it was you who farted that One Faithful Day
  • You kinda regretted it now that you have to sacrifice your gummy bears but h e y, better than getting your reputation ruined and get called Ms. Fartsfor the rest of kindergarten amirite?
  • So fast forward to elementary school
  • Surprise surprise you’re going to the same school as Mingyu 
  • He still follows you around btw
  • Also, you outgrew him so you call him Shorty now instead of Snotty
  • “How’s the air down there, Shorty?”
  • “Walk in traffic, Y/N”
  • Still asks for gummy bears during lunch period
  • Tbh it’s getting annoying at this point bc whenever you whip up your lunch bag he’d go nuts
  • "Is that spaghetti I smell?”
  • “Bring your own lunch, Mingyu.”
  • But then it starts to happen every time
  • He’ll know what you bring for lunch even before you unbox it
  • You’re getting suspicious
  • Is he half dog or something? How does he even know?
  • And then things get weirder
  • So basically Mingyu becomes the class guard aka that kid that stands in front of the classroom when there’s no teacher to inform the class when the teacher is coming
  • People starts complaining because Mingyu would come in and be like "The teacher’s coming ! !” but there’s nobody in the hallway?? so Mingyu pls explain???
  • “No I swear! She’s coming!!!”
  • Ofc nobody believed him and the class was in utter chaos when the teacher finally came in
  • “Mingyu, how did you know?”
  • “I heard her walking" 
  • And you’re like "lol what”
  • Anyways
  • He also becomes that annoying kid in class 
  • He’ll say that the class is too hot/too cold when it’s totally fine?? 
  • And when a teacher raises their voice he’d cover his ears
  • Also there was a time during a math test you and thought that you were going to ace the test because you’re top in class at least in elementary school if you’re bad at it lmao but surprise surprise Mingyu aced it too
  • But later during the day he comes up to you and apologized and said that he copied your paper
  • And you’re like ???? 
  • “Mingyu you sit two seats behind me how is that even possible???”
  •  He’ll be the first to know when it’s pizza day (“I can smell the pizza lol”)
  • But brings his own lunch to school
  • Claims that the cafeteria food smells and tastes weird
  • he never eats the food from school bc he claims that it smells weird and because he’s a picky eater
  • But basically Mingyu is physically hypersensitive to everything and people think he’s just whiny and annoying so the only friend he got is you
  • So you kinda took pity in him and you started to enjoy his company anyways so you let him hang around
  •  As long as he has his hand sanitizer with him at all times
  •  Fast fast forward to middle school 
  • Yayy time for puberty and hormones! fun fun fun 
  • Except it isn’t fun
  • Puberty is as fun for supers as it is for normal teenagers
  • It’s terrible enough to suddenly have a bazillion of zits appearing on your formerly-smooth face
  • But the fact that Shorty had a major growth spurt over the summer and is basically a f***ing tree now 
  • “Who’s short now, Y/N?”
  • And brags about it every time he has the chance
  • It’s also around this time that Mingyu has been acting even stranger
  • He’s easily distracted by a background noise, even if others don’t seem to hear it
  • He’d jump right out of his seat whenever the bell rings or any loud noises really 
  • At one point, a teacher got so angry and started shouting and when you looked at Mingyu he’s cowering in his seat with his hands low key on his ears, wincing every time the teacher raised their voice
  • He also becomes more secluded
  • Leaves the classes right after the bell rings, decided to take his lunch to a more quieter place under a tree at the school yard, avoids group projects..
  • You’re really concerned for him although you’re a bit hurt that he seemed like he’s keeping something from you
  • So you decided to ask him one day
  • “Mingyu are you ok? Is there something you’re not telling me?”
  • “Hahaha w-what makes u say that" 
  • You gave him a pointed look and it’s scary and he got reminded that time during elementary school you bit Sarah in the arm for cutting the queue
  • If that’s what ppl get for cutting your queue then what would happen if you find out that he’s different
  • He’s scared that the only person he’s been friends with for years would abandon him when they finally realize that he’s a freak
  • At that point of time, he just wishes that he could be like the other kids
  • But he also remembers that you’ve been there for him after all these times
  • You (kinda) tolerated all the times he sneezed in your hair 
  • “One more time, Mingyu and I will cut you.”
  • And the times he broke your toys after not realizing his own strength 
  • Also that dark time during elementary school when Danielle and her group of friends verbally bullied him for being “weird” and “different”
  • You stood up to them for him
  • You got yourself suspended and your parents called for punching the bullies in the face
  • That night you came to his house with a bag full of gummy bears and both of your favorite movies and you guys just hung out in his room
  • That when you said “Mingyu, I know you can’t even hurt a fly so if you need me to punch someone in the face I will”
  • Wow when did you become such a violent kid
  • But he knows it’s just your way of saying “I’ll always be there if you need me”
  • And honestly, you’re already a knight in shining armor to him the second you broke Danielle Davis’s nose
  • So he decided to tell you
  • How he knows what you’ll have for lunch
  • Why he’s so distracted all the time
  • And why he’s such a sensitive kid
  • He has heightened senses
  • *silence ensues*
  • He can’t help but starts to sweat as you stare at him, unblinkingly 
  • He wanted to strangle you, to force you to talk, to just say something
  • And then you do
  • “Wait ok so in kindergarten, you knew it was me who farted because of your super senses?”
  • lol. ded.
  • He just looked at you disappointedly “Seriously, Y/N, that’s the first thing that pops into your mind?”
  • “Well I’m sorry I can’t help it. But really can you really tell who farts in class. Also I’m really sorry for you, dude, smelling farts in HD must’ve suck.”
  • Ok but you’re kinda offended and sad why he kept it away from you for such a long time but soon realizes that people are judgmental jerks who’d just label Mingyu as an outcast if they find out
  • But basically, Mingyu is super duper relieved that you’re totally cool with it and you guys moved on from it
  • Fast forward to high school
  • *Achievement Unlocked: You got an S/O*
  • It’s not Mingyu ok
  • You met your S/O the first day of high school
  • They’re really sweet and caring and overall a nice person
  • Mingyu was more skeptical and protective when you first started to date but took the backseat when he realized that you can take care of yourself (lol remember Sarah and Danielle?)
  • Cheers you on your relationship and becomes your confidante and go-to person to talk about your relationship
  • He doesn’t mind at all.
  • He’s just happy that you’re happy what a cinnamon roll ;A;
  • Until one day he saw your s/o at the mall, hanging out with some girl he doesn’t recognize
  • They seemed pretty close and their arm would ever so often casually hangs on the girl’s shoulder
  • Mingyu’s general perception of your s/o has been good so far so although he was kinda surprised to see them hanging out with a girl that’s not you, he just thought that she might be their close friend or a family member or something so he brushed it off
  • He checked with his superhuman hearing and it’s not like they’re talking about anything suspicious or anything
  • But Mingyu being Mingyu, he was curious and wanted to look out over you
  • So he figured, if your s/o was up to no good, he’d have to find out himself
  • So he began to stalk investigate your s/o
  • You kinda picked up and would jokingly said “Don’t you dare steal them from me” and he’ll be like “No, no its not like that!” (lmao also he wouldn’t dare ofc)
  • But then Mingyu found out that your s/o has in fact, been cheating behind your back with a girl from school
  • He’s so surprised and more importantly, enraged that they would even do that to you
  • What have you ever done to deserve such trash of an s/o??? You deserved to be served and taken care of like royalty
  • That evening he went to your house to break the news to you
  • “Y/N, I have something to tell you”
  • You don’t believe him. You don’t want to believe him.
  • Your s/o has been such a caring and thoughtful person. They wouldn’t do that to you right?? 
  • So you do what you thought was right.
  • You got angry and told Mingyu that he was just being jealous, that he’s just mad that you now hang out with someone else. You told him to make some friends so he can get over it.
  • Mingyu got even angrier over the fact that you chose to defend your s/o and is hurt that you wouldn’t believe him, your best friend
  • But at that exact moment he also had an epiphany
  • He was jealous
  • He was sad that you now have someone else to hang out with
  • He was sad over the fact that you might drift away after all these years
  • He also realized that he cares so much about you
  • So so much that maybe it’s not the friendly kind of caring anymore
  • He realized that after all this time, he might be in love with his best friend
  • But he’s so angry so he decided to storm off and have you find out yourself, knowing how stubborn you can be
  • You don’t talk for the next few weeks 
  • He decided to avoid you completely and would change seats if you’re in the same class as him. He wouldn’t even spare you a glance in the hallways
  • You sit alone at lunch, with nobody to eat your gummy bears
  • This is the first time you guys had a fight this big
  • One day, during class, you decided you had enough and you made a mad dash out of the classroom to find Mingyu and tell him you were sorry (Teacher: kids these days smh.)
  • Otw there, you passed the janitor’s closet and heard some noise
  • You decided to be a snitch and took a peek
  • And there they were, your s/o and a girl, making out in the small cramped space, unaware that you’re watching
  • At that moment, all you can feel is your heartbreaking
  • You feel tears well up in your eyes, your body grows rigid and cold
  • You felt so so betrayed and lost that you don’t even have the energy to barge up to them and beat them yourselves
  • So you took a detour to the nurse’s office, your mission long forgotten
  • You laid down on a cot for a good half-an-hour before you heard the curtain being opened and at first you thought it was the nurse who decided to kick you out but then you felt a large hand brushing the top of your head ever so gently
  • And by God, nobody was allowed to do that to you except for
  • “Y//N, I came as soon as class is over, are you feeling ok?”
  • You looked up and there he was, looking at you with concern and yet with the softest face
  • And it felt so sincere that you broke down completely in front of him
  • He just held you as you cried into his shirt, blabbering nonsense and being a snotty mess
  • When you were much better, you told him what happened
  • And then he had a look in his eyes
  • He kissed your forehead and just left 
  • You’re confused because Mingyu?? what are you doing m8???
  • You didn’t heard from him until later in the afternoon
  • He got suspended
  • For punching your s/o smack in the face
  • You didn’t know what to do. Should you thank him??? be concerned???
  • Since when did he become so violent?
  • lmao he learned from you
  • But later in the evening, you came to his house, a bag of gummy bears in one hand and your favorite movies in the other
  • Neither of you said anything at first. You didn’t need to.
  • You both just climbed up his bed and started eating and watching the movies
  • Halfway through the movie, you glanced up at him
  • “Thank you”
  • He didn’t take his eyes off the screen “He deserved it. Should’ve know what was coming for him.”
  • You’re not satisfied so you sat up and took his face in your hands and his eyes finally finally met yours
  • And oh how lovely you looked in you sweatpants and oversized t-shirt, and yeah looking up kinda hurts his eyes because of the light but it’s casting a soft halo around you and when he met your gaze, it’s fierce and determined
  • Your eyes are still a bit red and puffy from all the crying earlier but to him, at this very moment, you're perfect.
  • You said “I’m sorry for not listening to you. I’m sorry for being such a jerk. I’m sorry for saying those hurtful things to you-”
  • But he cuts you off, his lips ascending onto yours into slow searing kiss
  • You lost your train of thoughts and while you thought that he’s the one with the heightened senses here, at that very moment it’s as if you had it too
  • Everything felt so warm and you don’t even know whether it’s from the close proximity, your body heat or the room. Your heart went overdrive and you’re scared that he might hear it He totally could
  • But most of all, it felt right
  • You know maybe you should’ve been aghast or the very least, disgusted, that you’re actually kissing your own best friend but it doesn’t feel like that with Mingyu
  • You can feel all his emotions in that one kiss and nothing ever felt so sincere and so warm
  • You didn’t know but at that very moment, Mingyu was experiencing the exact things, although everything is thrice more intense
  • After what felt like an eternity, he finally pulled away and there you are, gazing into each others eyes, breathing fast, cheeks flushed
  • “I’m sorry I did that.. and no! before you kill me, you’re just the most beautiful person I’ve ever met and you deserve someone who can see that and appreciate you and take care of you with all his hea-” he said before you pulled him up for another kiss
  • “I love you, too, you giant idiot.”
  • And at that very moment, you realize that after all, you might been in love with him
  • You remembered the kid with the weird haircut and snotty nose who caught you farting back in kindergarten and thought: “Who would’ve thought?
Very unpopular opinion here, But I think Googleplier has emotions.

“How can he have emotions he’s a robot?“

Well let me tell ya a thing

This was in the first google video called “Google IRL” ( if you didn’t know where the nerd came from). Here Matthias says “OK Google, do my laundry”.

As you can see Google is not happy. He even growls in the video after Matthias says it. Robots don’t really do that, they just do what their primary objective says.

Need more proof?

Originally posted by markipliergamegifs

This was from the most recent Google video ( Thank you mgg for making this gif so I didn’t have to)

Google makes this face after Bing tells him “Haven’t seen ya around ya old fart” normally robots don’t really care if they are called names. They just kinda do what they are meant to do, or you know.. try to kill humanity.

Google is more than just a robot, maybe that’s what makes him an ego, maybe that's Mark in there with his emotions.

I mean Mark is never scared to show his emotions.