ya be warned

NO OFFENSE BUT SHE C L E A R L Y TOLD EVERYONE “dont say i didn’t say i didn’t warn ya” IN 2014 AND YALL MADE HER SNAP 3 YEARS LATER IM LIVING!!!!!! 

  • Isaac: What the hell is that?!
  • Derek confused, looking down at his bags: I went to the farmer’s market....
  • Erica, smirking: I don’t think we can all eat that.
  • Derek: ...
  • Boyd: You weren’t supposed to bring back the farmer.
  • Stiles, looking at his plaid shirt, pointing at the pack while walking away: I’m putting you all up for adoption!

At the people complaining about the very strong possibility of there being no interviews in this era, did you miss the “there will be no further explanation, there will just be reputation” part or….?

Being Tony Stark’s Daughter and Dating Peter Parker Would Include (Part 2):

Summary: Just dating Peter… and being Tony’s daughter.

Authors Note: This was highly requested in the comments and I really enjoyed making the last one, so here ya  go! <3

Warning(s): swearing and deadpool (again)


Being Tony Stark’s Daughter and Dating Peter Parker Would Include (Part 2):

•y'all “tis about to get wilD


•you and peter have a stable relationship™

-y'all don’t really fight

-if you do it’s something stupid

-“I CANT BELIEVE YOU ATE THE LAST BROWNIE, THE AUDACITY, I AM DISGUSTED, YOUR BEHAVIOUR IS ATROCIOUS”

-“ I’m lactose intolerant Peter”

-“YOU ARE A TERRIBLE- wait you are?!?!”

-“HAHAHA SIKE” *cue you running away with the last brownie*


•Tony usually mediates your fights.

-he doesn’t want his spiderlings to be sad.

-not good for his representation in the ‘approving dad’ world

-“(Y/N) I suggest you give Peter back his brownie”

-“I ate it”

-*tony giving you the scolding parent look*

-“what do you want me to do? Shit it out?”

-*cap bursts through the door* “LANGUAGE (Y/N)


•peter still uses pickup lines on you

-“my Spidey sense isn’t the only thing that’s tingling”

-“peter do you know what that means?

-“yes it means I feel all tingly and happy when I’m around you”

-“BOiIi”

-he clearly gets these from Wade


•peter going on dad dates with Tony

-“I can’t believe you remembered our anniversary”

-“I could never forget it Mr Stark”

-“um Peter…you’re dating me?”

-“This is an A B conversation (Y/N) leave”

-your dad and Peter have probably been on more dates with each other than Peter has with you.


•you and peter are always together

-the avengers freak out when you aren’t.

-“WHERE IS THE LOCATION OF BROTHER PETER?? HAS HE JOINED THE DECEASED??? I SHALL AVENGE YEE MAN OF SPIDER”

-“Thor chill… he went to the bathroom”


•Peter always has his hands on you

-whether it’s holding hands, or he’s touching your shoulder, wrapping his arms around your waist.

-he likes to know that you’re always there.


•hUgS frOm BehInD

-y'all this is the only time Peter feels like he’s the big spoon

-he’ll rest his chin on your head and your back will be pressed to his chest

-aw™


•peter using his height to his advantage

-he’ll hide your things in high places

-so you call for help

-usually ends in you standing on him to get what you want.


•HICKieS yO

-it happened when you first showed Peter your room

-Tony told you to leave the door open but y'all didn’t let that bother you ;)

-“YOU HAVE TAINTED MY YOUNG PETER HE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME”

-“ father why do you not express this concern for me”

-“it’s because you’re the devils spawn”


•finally perfecting that spiderman kiss

-“WE FINALLY DID IT”

-“HELLS YEAH”

-“how do I get down?”

- *cue peter’s web snapping*


•stealing Peter’s clothes

-old and new

-he leaves a sweater at your place?

-BAM it’s yours

-buys a new shirt?

-BaM It’s yours

-he eventually runs out of clothes

-Tony buys him a new wardrobe


•having a meme group chat with Ned

-sending memes about spiderman

-peter regrets introducing you to Ned


•going on dates to the zoo

-Peter taking pictures of you admiring things

-a passerby reports Peter to the security guard for looking like a creep

-your dad has to bail peter out


•whenever peter loses you in a large group of people he always knows how to find you.

-“yo Pete where’s your girlfriend?”

-“hold on one sec” *shakes wallet*

-“DID I HEAR MONEY?!?!”

-“found her”


•spoiling peter bc you’re filthy rich and he deserves the world

-“happy birthday baby!!”

-“(Y/N) is that a car???”

-*you smiling uncontrollably*

-”(Y/N) I can’t drive’’

-’’Its a keepsake’’ 


•convincing your dad to take peter on missions.

-instantly regretting it bc peter is a soft boi who needs protection.

-“If you die on this mission, I will kill you”

-updating the suit bc you must protec™

-“I’ve added extra padding to your suit to soften any falls”

-he literally cannot breathe now


•accidentally admitting that Tom Holland is your celebrity crush.

-“but we look exactly alike??”

-“don’t be ridiculous Peter, you look nothing alike”

•dates to museums and science exhibitions

-watching peter nerd out

-v cute™


•going out with Liz and Michelle for girls nights

-peter dropping in on you as part of ‘patrol’

-almost activating ‘instant kill mode’ when a guy talks to you


•you putting on the suit just to talk to Karan

-“am I the only one that thinks Peter smells like avocado? Like does he even eat avocado?”

-“I too have detected this unusual scent Ms Stark”


•Peter freaks tf out when you get sick

-like mental break down freak out

-he googles your symptoms

-which means he always thinks your dying.

-“I DIDNT KNOW WHAT SOUP YOU LIKED SO I BROUGHT ALL OF THEM USING YOUR DADS CREDIT CARDS”

-he brought like 50 tins of soup

-will not let you leave his sight

-“Peter I need to take a dump”

-“I’ll come with you”


•Wade is always crashing your dates

-he thinks you guys are friends

-“Wade will you ever leave us alone?”

-“Of course Peetie! When (Y/N)’s father accepts my adoption papers”

-“Why would a grown ass man need adopting?”

-“It’s to fund my expensive lifestyle”

-Wade also steals Peter’s wallet so he has an excuse to come along.

-eventually getting a restraining order on Wade.


•Star Wars marathons

-you thinking Luke Skywalker is hot

-Peter getting jealous

-he dresses up like Luke the next day.


•he finds your old spiderman fan account on tumblr

-when he does he just stares at you smugly from across the room.

-“what?”

-“oh nothing” ( ͡º ͜ʖ ͡º)

-he starts texting you the ( ͡º ͜ʖ ͡º) face.

-“so you bet spiderman is one sexy specimen under that mask?“ ( ͡º ͜ʖ ͡º)

-you want to die

-"I will delete you from my life”


•going to Starbucks for your anniversary dates


•peter insisting you have him on speed dial just incase anything happens

-you mostly use it to get food

-“hi”

-“(Y/N)??? Are you okay??”

-“I’ll have a double cheeseburger and fries please.”

-“(Y/N) pls”

-“what? I’m hungry”

-“may I remind you that I am  not supposed to be used for ordering take out”

-“then what the fuck are you supposed to be?”

-“your boyfriend”

-“oh yes that too”


•you wear matching outfits to school sometimes

-you are the power couple of the school


•taking Tony’s car for a joy ride

-crashing it bc peter gets nervous and webs up the windscreen

-it’s all good tho

-you use his card to buy a new one

-and blame it on Wade


•cute goodmorning texts

-“make sure to brush your teeth, you have terrible morning breath xox ~ (Y/N)

-"please brush your hair today, yesterday you looked like a yeti that had been run over and drowned in toilet water <3 Peter”


•everyone noticing how whipped Peter is for you

-except you

-peter doesn’t even know what that means he’s so outdated


•Peter has coffee mornings with Steve

-you’re never invited


•sending each other selfies

-your ugliest ones usually end up as your lock screens

-“who’s that horrendous looking creature?”

-“my fucking boyfriend bish”


•you die when peter speaks Spanish

-“pan caliente”

-“ I don’t know what you just said but please let it be the only thing you say at my funeral”

-he said hot bread


•Peter worries about your wellbeing

-he sets up daily reminders on your phone to drink water

-irl it’s just him texting you h20 puns and jokes


•you are very territorial

-if a girl so much as looks at Peter

-you will snatch the weave

-one time you actually pulled out some girls hair

-Peter thought it was hot™

-Steve and Tony did not ™


•stony are your parents tbh


•like your dad you have a lot of issues

-you’re scared peter will leave

-but he never does

-he always comes back


•arcade dates

-Peter gives you a promise ring from a vending machine

-the avengers freak out and think it’s an engagement ring.

-Steve gives you a lecture about patience and how you should wait.

-Tony on the other hand…

-“I KNEW THIS DAY WOULD COME I HAVE BEEN PLANNING THIS FOR MONTHS”

-“Uh Mr Stark, we’re 17 and it’s just a promise ring”

-“You are both disappointments and disgraces to the Stark name”


•caring for him after missions

-cuddles

-back rubs

-Peter is very clingy at this point.


•knowing exactly what calms each other down.


•Training with Peter

-having a run on the treadmill whilst he does weights.

-you trip and hit your head

-Peter drops a weight on his foot bc he’s shook.

-you both go to hospital and agree never to workout together again.


•carnival dates

-peter sees a game and insists he wins a price for you

-he loses

-3 times

-you end up having a go and you win a fish

-peter has the fish for 4 days of the week and you have him for 3

-the fish is your son™

-his name is ‘the fish™’


•stargazing and talking about a future together


•you both trust and love each other a lot

•you love peter a lot

-although you don’t say it often

-you show it though

- but he already knows it

2

The Maximum Ride series by James Patterson

“Some kids get called “bundles of joy'” or “slices of heaven” or “dreams come true.‘” We got “the fifty-fourth generation of DNA experiments.” Doesn’t have the same warm and fuzzy feel. But maybe I’m oversensitive.”

You’re not my Wife

The girl handed you the phone with a giddy smile. “Do you mind taking the picture?” she begged. 

You laughed and took her phone from her. “Sure, sweetheart. But I’ll warn ya, that one gets a little handsy when he is drunk,” you said, gesturing toward Jensen. “And he was drunk off his ass three whiskey’s ago,” you laughed with a wink. 

The girl laughed before stepping between Jensen and Jared. They both towered over her. She couldn’t wipe the adorable smile off of her face. You smiled to yourself as you raised the phone to take the picture. 

You were watching the screen as Jensen planted a firm kiss on the girl’s temple. You had to stifle a giggle as you heard him lean back and start talking to her. 

“Damn, Y/N, you smell so good. Did you change perfumes or something? And when did your hair get so long?” he asked, looking down at the girl. 

You tossed your head back in laughter as you snapped the picture then got Jensen’s attention. 

You snapped your fingers so that Jensen looked up at you.

“Hey, Jensen!” you giggled. 

When his eyes met yours, he smiled in recognition then looked back at the girl he had just kissed. He looked thoroughly confused. 

“You’re not my wife,” he slurred as he pulled away from the girl. “Who are you again?” 

Jared laughed as he pulled the girl into a hug. 

“Don’t mind his drunk ass,” Jared laughed as he squeezed the fan to his chest. “Y/N warned you about how he gets when he has had a few too many,” he said shaking his head. 

“Hey!” Jensen said indignantly. “We’re celebrating, Asshat!” he declared as he looked at you then back at Jared. Your eyes went wide. Jensen had no filter after a lot of liquor. He was about to spill the beans to everyone. 

“Jens, I think that’s enough,” you said, your eyes wide as he looked at you confused still. 

“What, beautiful? We ARE celebrating. We have a damn good reason to celebrate,” he said, walking toward you, snaking his arms around your waist and pulling you close, nuzzling into your neck. 

“I know,” you whispered, letting your hands settle on Jensen’s shoulders. “But the reason we are celebrating  is still a secret,” you reminded him. 

Jensen kissed your neck then pulled away to look you in the eye. “You mean they don’t know you’re pregnant?” he asked. 

You slapped a hand over his mouth, and he just smiled back at you his eyes lighting up as he kissed your palm. 

“What?” Jared and Gen said at the same time as the girl walked away. 

“They do now,” you laughed. “We were waiting until we told both of our parents,” you added, popping Jensen in the stomach. He shrugged innocently as he looked from you to Gen and Jared. “But I should have known once this one started drinking, it wouldn’t be a secret for long,” you laughed. 

Jensen contemplated you for a minute. “Secrets are stupid,” he declared. “Hey everybody! Listen up!” he yelled at no one in particular. “My sexy, gorgeous, beautiful wife is PREGNANT!” he declared triumphantly. “And I’m the lucky son of a bitch that knocked her up. Now THAT part was fun,” he laughed. 

“Okay, that’s enough, Ackles,” you laughed, kissing him quickly so that he would shut up. His tongue tangled with yours before the two of you pulled away breathless. 

“That mean you wanna get started on another?” he teased, running his hand up under your shirt. 

“Down boy,” you said, slapping his hand away. “What am I gonna do with you?” you laughed, kissing him once more. 

“Congrats, guys,” Jared said with a laugh, pulling you both into a bear hug. 

“Thanks man,” Jensen said seriously. “She is one hell of a woman,” he added, looking at you proudly. 

“Oh?” you asked. 

“Hell yeah,” Jensen replied, pulling you into his arms and kissing you with fervor.  

“Don’t you forget it, Ackles,” you teased, running your hands along the length of his back, the mystery picture girl long forgotten.