wrong sir

absolxguardian  asked:

Something weird I noticed on my reread of Slippery Slope. Lemony mentions his grandmother when describing what happened in the stronghold and the Baudelaires would never experience. Considering he and his siblings had been kidnapped and he'd only be able to meet with VFD operatives pretending to be parents I'd assumed his family was new to the VFD. This one little throwaway line has me thinking and I'm lost.

I don’t think Lemony’s family was new to V.F.D. The Snicket mansion was built with Sir’s special emerald wood, which is mostly for the headquarters or the organization. The cheesemakers of the Volunteer Farm Dairy are also mentioned as members of V.F.D.

In fact it is said that V.F.D. usually kidnaps the children of people who were already part of the organization. In the reunion transcript of the V.F.D. building committee, it is explicitly said that the volunteers ask the parents’ permission before taking in the children, which would require them knowing about the organization.

On the day you officially join the organization, you will hear a noise outside your home. It may sound like the howl of a wolf, the cawing of a crow, the hissing of a snake, the chirping of a cricket, the engine of an automobile, the keys of a typewriter, the striking of a match, or the turning of a page. The noise will come in the middle of the night, the middle of the morning, or, in very rare cases, late in the afternoon. Ask your parents what the noise was. If they reply “nothing”, they are replying in code, because there is never “nothing” outside one’s home. If you are interested in volunteering, answer your parents with the following question: “If there’s nothing out there, then what was that nouse?” We will be listening, and will know it is safe to act.
[The un-Authorized Autobiography, pp. 190-191]

So the Snicket family has clearly worked with V.F.D. for at least one generation. Besides Lmony never says his grandmother was part of it, only that his grandmother’s almond cookie recipe was used at one of their headquarters. But we know Lemony lived there for some time so it’s equally possible that he simply introduced V.F.D. to his nana’s recipe. We know from “All The Wrong Questions” that Lemony is very partial to almond cookies and a great cook.

Sunny would never operate the projector in the movie room, or practice the art of the fake mustache in the disguise center, or sit in the parlor at tea time and eat the almond cookies made from my grandmother’s recipe.
[The Slippery Slope, Chapter Twelve]


Correct me if I’m wrong, but sir didn’t this used to be the cute part of the song?😩

Hamilton songs in a nutshell

Alexander Hamilton: everything goes wrong 

Aaron Burr, Sir: everything rhymes also BRRAH BRRAH

My Shot: hype af also plot

The Story of Tonight: raise a glass to freedom

The Schuyler Sisters: aND PEGGY also enter Eliza and Angelica

Farmer Refuted: fuck u britain and u too samuel seabury

You’ll Be Back: king george is a yandere

Right Hand Man: haMILTON WE NEED YOU

A Winter’s Ball: fuckbois everywhere

Helpless: Eliza x Hamilton otp

Satisfied: heartbreaking regret™

The Story of Tonight (Reprise): the act I shitpost also aaron has a british wife

Wait for It: deep af™

Stay Alive: fucking charles lee

Ten Duel Commandments: this song is cool now but wait until later in the play

Meet Me Inside: alexander you had ONE JOB jfc go home

That Would Be Enough: literally don’t die that’s all I ask of you

Guns and Ships: lafAYETTE also we’re screwed we need alexander back

History Has It’s Eyes On You: hamilton I’ll let you fight but don’t be an idiot


What Comes Next: lol good luck by yourself

Dear Theodosia: Aaron tries his best, Hamilton shows off his son

Non-Stop: alexander hamilton shut the FUCK UP

What’d I Miss: thomas jefferson in the FUCKING HOUSE

Cabinet Battle #1: epic rap battles of history af

Take A Break: un deux trois quatre cinq six sept huit neuf

Say No to This: alexander does a massive bad

The Room Where It Happens: Compromises are made

Schuyler Defeated: alex: what the shit burr?? burr:  ¯\_ ツ _/¯

Cabinet Battle #2: we cannot square up

Washington On Your Side: we gotta expose hamilton

One Last Time: washington more like washingdone

I Know Him: John Adams for president? lol you wild

The Adams Administration: bye hamilton 

We Know: yeah I cheated on my wife but I didn’t steal money

Hurricane: it’s a bad idea but an idea nonetheless

The Reynolds Pamphlet: he exposed himself?? yo he wild

Burn: the heartbreak of act II

Blow Us All Away: nononononononono


It’s Quiet Uptown: sadness squared

The Election of 1800: jefferson wins and burr is salty

Your Obedient Servant: yknow what fuck you hamilton square up

Best of Wives and Best of Women: shit’s going down son

The World Was Wide Enough: hamilton is fucking dead

Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story: crying ensues

in his heart of hearts

written for @bellamyspirate for Bellarke Secret Santa 2016

beta’d by the lovely @missemarissa

“Guardsman Blake.” Captain Miller falls into step beside him on his way to home from his post on Sunday evening. “There’s been a change in assignments.”

Bellamy stops walking and steps to the side of the corridor, turning to face his superior. “Sir?”

“You have been reassigned to Medical, effective tomorrow morning.” Captain Miller pulls a keycard out from his pocket and holds it out. “Same hours, just a different location.”

Bellamy takes the card with a frown. “Did I do something wrong, sir?”

Since graduating from his guard training, his post had been monitoring the youth rec center. It wasn’t the most glamorous position, but sometimes one of the kids would play the piano in the corner of the room, and he always liked to listen to the music. He was in no position to argue with his commanding officer, but he wasn’t too keen on spending all his shifts with sick people.

“On the contrary, actually.” Captain Miller steps closer and lowers his voice. “Councilwoman Griffin requested you specifically.”


Abigail Griffin was as close to Ark royalty as you could get without being the Chancellor. She had a seat on the council, was the Chief of Surgery, and her husband was the engineer responsible for solving the Ark’s recent oxygen deficit. While Bellamy was sure that Jake Griffin was a genius in his own right, people often forgot that a mechanic from his own Factory Station, Raven Reyes, had a key part in solving the problem.

“Her daughter is a medical apprentice now, and Councilwoman Griffin requested that only the best of our recruits is assigned to her shift.” Captain Miller tells him with a conspiring wink.

Bellamy bristles. Though he appreciates the compliment, this is just the kind of behavior that reminds him that the people from Alpha station are nothing but entitled pricks. What makes Princess Griffin so special that she needs a better guard than anyone else?

Instead of saying any of this, Bellamy nods and pockets the keycard. “I’ll be on my way then, sir.”

“Good man.” Captain Miller claps him on the shoulder. “And Guardsman Blake? Let’s keep that information between us.”

Bellamy smiles tightly. He’s always been good at keeping secrets. [AO3]

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Winter Lust Playlist : Side A

Originally posted by dorksinspace

Key wayne ft Ty dolla $ign ~ Go Without Her  

Jacquees ~ Persian Rugs rmx 

Tory Lanez ~ Wit it// We did it  

Tory Lanez ~ Rain 

Kehlani’s Freestyle Piano cover(interlude) 

Bryson Tiller ~ The Sequence  

Partynextdoor ~ Wait 4 you  

D.R,A.M. ft  SZA ~ Caretaker  

Kranium ft Ty Dolla $ign ~ Nobody has Know 

Vybz Kartel ~ Enchanting  

Dj Sir Crks ft Sango & Tamia ~ So into you(interlude)

Partynextdoor ~ Codeine bumping (when u gone i get slowed)

KR ~  Bout That 

ELHAE ~ Love a Nigga

Bryson Tiller ~ Right My Wrongs 

Sir ~ I Love You( OUTRO ) 

Bonus(Tell her why ?) Side A : SPZRKT & Sango ~ The Motive//Used to the melody

Side B coming soon in december Hope you all enjoy this !!!

dont know if dogs have dreams but one of my dogs woke up barking angrily, i go to him and say “ young sir whats wrong “ he looks up at me, wags his tail and goes back to sleep like the fuck was that about

Mr. Oh || Crack!Convo

Sehun: “(Y/N), where’s my coffee?”

(Y/N): “On your desk, sir.”

Sehun: “Really? Where on my desk, (Y/N)? Because it isn’t here.”

(Y/N): “Mr. Oh, it was here moments ago. I don’t know-”

Sehun: “(Y/N). Do you know where your boyfriend is?”

(Y/N): “At work, sir?”

Sehun: “Wrong. He’s probably at his booty call’s house at this very moment.”

(Y/N): That was uncalled for, sir. He told me he’s working-”

Sehun: “And you told me my coffee was on my desk. I guess we’ve both been lied to.”

What did I just write omg

Vimes stood up. “You know what I always say,” he said.
Carrot removed his helmet and polished it with his sleeve. “Yes, sir. ‘Everyone’s guilty of something, especially the one’s that aren’t,’ sir.”
“No, not that one…”
“Er…'Always take into consideration the fact that you might be dead wrong,’ sir?”
“No, nor that one either?”
“Er…'How come Nobby ever got a job as a watchman?’, sir? You say that a lot.”
“No! I meant, 'Always act stupid,’ Carrot.”
“Ah, right, sir. From now on I shall remember that you always say that, sir.”
—  Jingo,  Terry Pratchett (pg. 84)
Familiar Strangers - Six: Genma

Okay, this is the part I’ve been looking forward to since I started this self-indulgent story of mine. (-whispers- The Life and Times of a Shinobi Den Mother by @blackkatmagic has absolutely nothing to do with how much I adore Genma. Nup, not a thing. -shifty eyes-)

The first sign Genma got that something was wrong was the two sets of shoes sitting innocently in his front hall. He stopped on the threshold, staring at the footwear. Almost all of his friends wore the standard blue shinobi sandals, not kunoichi heels or black shinobi boots. But what sort of intruder just left their shoes in the hall like a guest?

The second sign he got was the sound of unfamiliar voices coming from his living room. They were quiet enough that he had to strain to pick out the words, but they weren’t trying to hide their presence. So Genma did what any good shinobi would do. He shut the front door silently, then leaned back against it to listen in.

“-wrong. The world cannot change this much in the space of one day.” Female, young, probably a teenager, by Genma’s best guess. She would be the owner of the kunoichi heels, most likely, although girls her age didn’t tend to go for them, as they were favoured by village-bound and retired kunoichi. Pride usually stopped the young, up-and-coming, active kunoichi from wearing them. And this one sounded like she had a lot of pride. She sounded controlled and in control, in a way that suggested there was a lot of anger she very carefully wasn’t showing. “Dead clans and people going rogue and a different Hokage don’t just happen overnight. So someone did something to make the world this messed up, and when I find them, they’re going to bleed until they fix it, and then they’re going to burn.”

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